投稿類別：英文寫作類

篇名： An Expression of Love - Hugs

作者： 江庭芳。台北市立士林高級商業職業學校。高二 12 班 呂蘊宜。台北市立士林高級商業職業學校。高二 12 班 簡慧琳。台北市立士林高級商業職業學校。高二 12 班

指導老師： 洪儷倩老師

PDF created with pdfFactory trial version www.pdffactory.com An Expression of Love - Hugs

Introduction

Have you hugged anyone lately? Do you know how powerful this little action can be? Sometimes a hug is worth more than a thousand words. When we are depressed, what we only need is a big warm hug to soothe our mood. The strange thing is, it seems that any hug will work! We’ll feel better even if we hug a stranger. How is this possible? And what is the secret behind this miracle?

Speaking of hugging strangers, many of us may have heard about “Free Hugs”, but never know what it means. According to the official website of Free Hugs, “Free Hugs” was started by Juan Mann, who was a lonely Australian flying back from America with no family and friends, on June 30, 2004. With such solitary, he decided to interact with strangers. Perhaps, there would be someone as lonely as him out there and just needed a hug to move on. And then, the “Free Hugs” event started spanning around the world. Everyone wants to lighten others’ life by a simple hug. Simply, “Free Hugs” intends a social movement, implying hugging random strangers in public settings. It is an act of kindness to reach out as well as brightening up strangers’ life.

So how can a hug have such a great influence on people when the definition on the dictionary is only “to put your arms around someone and hold them tightly to show love or friendship”? Satir (2004), an American Psychologist and Educator had once said, “We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.” Once she wrote about how Americans are “losing touch” with this very important communication skill. During a study conducted by University of Miami School of Medicine, Touch Research Institutes, it was noted that French women touched their children more often than the American parents so that French kids were said to be less aggressive than their American counterparts while playing at a playground. But in this faulty world, nothing is perfect. It’s hard for us to fully believe in all those intact assumptions, saying hugs are flawless. Don’t hugs have a flip side? What if the purpose of the hugger is to offend you or even kill you in the back? Are hugs still a pleasure or a dark shadow which will never be washed? Of course, the happiness that hugs bring to us is thousand times more than the unhappiness. For some how, we are curious about the pros and cons of hugs.

There are divergences among hugs in different cultures. A hug sounds easy to understand, but when we look deep into the background of every culture, we’ll know that not every society has such a hugging expression like the westerners. Though it’s a

1

PDF created with pdfFactory trial version www.pdffactory.com An Expression of Love - Hugs

way of expressing love, easterners are still shyer and avoid body-touching movements in communicating with people, especially the elders. In the past, in China, a hug wasn’t a way of greeting. It was only for husbands and wives or mothers and children; it was a really private and personal action. How they greeted people was by bowing or only by a few words of saying hello. As there were less body-contacting actions in the past, there is no surprise that easterners are less familiar with hugs. On the contrary, most of the westerners grow up in a hug-as-a-greeting society. They are familiar with hugs and perhaps love to hug people! So, do hugs count as family interior actions or international public manners? Due to the globalization, it seems that the young generation of easterners is much more confident with hugs than the old generation. Therefore, in this project, we’d also like to find out whether there is a difference between easterners and westerners in giving and receiving hugs.

Overall, we certainly think hugs benefit us a lot. It not only promotes our spiritual excitement but also comforts us when we are in a terrible mood. In this report, we are taking you to the world of hugs, trying to find out the answers to the following questions: Why are hugs so powerful? How can “Free Hugs” be so popular? Does everyone have the positive attitude toward hugs? What is the difference between easterners and westerners in giving hugs and receiving hugs?

Method

In order to answer the questions mentioned above, we first surfed on the Internet to find out some related information about hugs. Moreover, we personally experienced “Free Hugs”, trying to lighten up strangers’ life on streets. Finally, we delivered 200 questionnaires to people of different ages and cultural backgrounds, easterners and westerners separately, yearning to know how people from different ages and cultures feel about hugs.

Results and discussion A. Free Hugs 1. The origin of “Free Hugs”

The campaign of “Free Hugs” now has become more and more popular around the world. Among different versions of its origin, the most commonly-known one was the real story of Juan Mann, who was shadowed by the loneliness when he was back to his hometown, , Australia. His parents passed away and he had no friends. He stood at the arrivals terminal, looking at other passengers meeting their friends and

2

PDF created with pdfFactory trial version www.pdffactory.com An Expression of Love - Hugs

family, opening their arms to hug each other for pleasure. He wanted someone waiting for him out there, too. So, he got some cardboards and a marker to make a sign with the words “Free Hugs”. The first person who gave him the hug told him how her dog had died this morning and that morning was her only daughter’s death anniversary. She told her how lonely and sad she was, and the only thing she needed was a hug. After the hug, they put their arms on each other’s shoulder and they smiled. This campaign gradually becomes a global action, which is really an encouraging activity for everyone to join in.

2. The popularity of “Free Hugs”

The reasons why Free Hugs hit the world by storm in 2006 weren’t just because of the powerful infections of hugs, but of the saying that hugs are able to fix some abashed situation better than the language. Youtube, the video website, also played a big role in popularizing the” Free Hugs” campaign. If there’s no Youtube for people to upload and download videos, free hugs won’t be that popular around the world as well. With the modern technology, a young man’s unwitting idea had disseminated worldwide and even has changed the world.

3. The experience and observation of “Free Hugs”

In order to know “Free Hugs” better and to experience it in person, our group started the “Free Hugs” campaign in the eastern part of on Sunday, 13, December, 2009. At first we were too embarrassed to do anything, holding the “Free Hugs” signs and putting the most awkward smiles on. When we found people just passing by when we didn’t do anything, we started to yell “Free hugs! Who wants a free hug?” And then, we began to put out our arms and try to give people free hugs. Miracles happened! People started to give us their hugs. The more hugs we receive, the more pleasantness we have. Giving a stranger a tight warm hug is really something, especially when the person sees the sign at distance and hang their arms far enough for you to see. For us, it doesn’t matter who the person was because a hug is powerful enough for us to beam. As the campaign went on, we discovered some fun facts about people.

1. Couples: When we met couples on streets, no matter it’s a foreigner or Taiwanese, the guy would always refuse to give hugs. Even their girlfriend said it’s okay, the guy would still say no unless the girl hugged first.

3

PDF created with pdfFactory trial version www.pdffactory.com An Expression of Love - Hugs

2. Foreigners: Foreigners weren’t that open-handed as we thought. Five out of ten said no to us. We guessed the stereotype of “foreigners love to hug” is from foreign movies, but in reality it might not be true, especially to strangers.

3. Taiwanese: Taiwanese males were shyer to give hugs than the females. Some Chinese that we met on the street said they would prefer bowing to hugging. We supposed it’s because we were all girls. Many Taiwanese gentlemen were afraid to approach us, not to mention giving a hug.

4. Families: If it’s family with children, parents would always ask their children to give hugs first. Some of the children would be really shy to do so, starting to play hide and seek with us.

Also, some people would ask for our purpose first before they give us a hug. After hugging so many people in a day, we really think hugging is a great way to express our love and feelings, and it really has the power to brighten one’s life.

B. All about Hugs

After our “Free Hugs” campaign, we are mainly curious about two things. First, do different ways of hugs really show different expressions and will they really work? Second, what is the secret power which makes hugs so powerful? In the following section, we are going to find out the answers.

1. Different types of hugs

Do we really give different hugs to different people or in diverse situations? During our “Free Hugs” experience, we hugged children, boys, ladies, middle-aged men, old men, and even puppies. Each of the hug we gave was somehow different. It

4

PDF created with pdfFactory trial version www.pdffactory.com An Expression of Love - Hugs

seems that we have various ways to embrace strangers. How about in our reality life, do we give different types of hugs to different people? According to our findings, there are mainly five different types of hugs described as follows.

a. Frame Hug - It’s commonly used as “hello hug” or “good-bye hug” in a formal situation, and also for the people who you don’t really know. You might need to briefly brush your cheeks with each other.

b. Bear Hug- It’s also called “Over Hug”. Bear hugs often go with intimate relationships. It’s not sexual related but a feeling of secure. Usually people will wrap each others’ waists tightly, squeeze with cheeks, and pressed cheeks together.

c. Heart to heart Hug- This is similar to a hello hug, but more for closer relationships, usually lovers. They hold one another’s shoulders by making their hearts as close as possible. This heart to heart hug normally will come along with a kiss.

d. Team Hugs- Teammates are face to face, shoulder by shoulder in a circle. Team hugs can help the group together achieve more, improving the feeling of being supported.

e. Winner Hug- It usually occurs after you achieved a success or your sport team won the season game. You might be so excited and start to jump and punch fists in the air.

As you can see, there are types of different hugs and we really give different hugs in diverse circumstances and to different people. Are you curious about why it is? Let’s move on to the next section, the psychology of hugs, to find out all the answers.

2. The psychology and therapy of Hugs

People can produce mutual love, trust and endorsement when they hug each other. Embrace is considered a natural reaction, also a feeling of loved, mercy, needed and all kinds of happiness. Hugs have amazing effect to express support, treat diseases and help growth. Some medical agencies even use hug therapy to remove anxiety and sadness in order to enhanced patient’s will. It is also stated that hug therapy is able to prevent mental trauma. A research study at Swedish University of Agricultural Sciences indicates that hugs can fight dejection and straighten immune

5

PDF created with pdfFactory trial version www.pdffactory.com An Expression of Love - Hugs

system. Hugs can make you younger and more powerful. One hug a day helps you bond relationship and decrease the frustration.

The magic of hugs can be seen from the following example. There was a premature baby lying on an incubator almost out of breath. For the sake to save the baby, the nurse came up with an idea of putting the twins together in the same incubator. Surprisingly, her twin sister put her arm on her younger sister’s shoulders, which was a way of embracing. At that time, dying child’s low blood oxygen index had gradually picked up, heart rate was stabilized and body temperature returned to normal. From the case, we can see that a hug or embrace can be so powerful to save one’s life.

3. Negative reports about hugs

The social climate in China’s is more conservative than in , but it has also rolled a wave of Free Hugs. There was a group of teenagers organizing “hug teams” on the Internet, creating their own idea of “exchanging a hug for one dollar” action to raise donations for charities. Although they started the campaign with good intentions, it had received some criticisms in China. Some thought there are much more great things that should be done out there besides hugging; the others thought that there are different culture backgrounds between the east and the west and it’s too early for them to hold this campaign as an oriental. Easterners are used to the action of bow, smile, and hand-shaking. Easterners might be reluctant to give hugs to people directly like westerners. Some people even criticize that hugging in public settings is easy to remind sexual desire or sexual violence. Therefore, we can know that there are still some people who can’t accept hugs as a greeting, not to mention giving other’s warmth. They somehow still hold a negative attitude toward hugs.

C. Comparisons of Easterners’ and Westerners’ views on hugging

1. Stereotype

There is a stereotype of people thinking easterners and westerners express their emotions differently. Orientals tend to be shyer to use body language or tell their love directly, but that doesn’t mean they are less eager to have hugs. It’s the society that leads them to lose the custom of body touching. Most of eastern parents usually use materials, solid rules and actions to teach their children and they tend to neglect the children’s inner world’s feeling, emotional needs and care. One of our Taiwanese friend even told us that he had tried to say “I love you” to his family before. But his

6

PDF created with pdfFactory trial version www.pdffactory.com An Expression of Love - Hugs

father answered, “Are you drunk?” and his mother thought he was ill. Because of those traditional images in eastern culture, it makes some people afraid to express their love directly.

In Western culture, parents, children, siblings, and friends are usually hugging and kissing. Therefore, these expressions are not only common for them but also be seen as a routine in their life. Most of them also realize that body expressions can't be replaced with the language.

2. Frequency and Reasons of giving hugs

In order to clearly understand more about people from various cultural backgrounds’ opinions of hugs, we surveyed 200 people in total, separately westerners and easterners. According to our results, we found more westerners have the habit of hugging people every day. From the figures below (Figure 1and 2), it can be somehow concluded that westerners show their emotion by body-touching more than easterners. Seventy percent of westerners hug people every day while there are only 35% of easterners hug others every day.

30% 35% YES YES NO NO 65% 70%

Figure1 Percentage of westerners Figure 2 Percentage of easterners hugging people everyday hugging people everyday

In our study, we also surveyed people about who they usually hug with. Surprisingly, hugging friends is the greatest (30%), followed by family and lovers, which are 28% and 13%. Therefore, it can be seen that nowadays most people are only used to give hugs to those of intimate relationships.

Talking about the purpose of hugging, from our study, it shows that no matter for easterners or westerners the major reason of hugging is usually for greeting and showing their love. To give or receive comforts is the second. In fact, there is no

7

PDF created with pdfFactory trial version www.pdffactory.com An Expression of Love - Hugs

difference between easterners and westerners.

3. Views on Free Hugs

In order to know how people feel about free hugs, we also put some interesting questions about free hugs in our survey. Fifty percent of both westerners and easterners said they would like to give free hugs to strangers on streets. However, while we were distributing questionnaires, some people told us that “Free Hugs” is a ridiculous idea. They believed hugging is an expression of personal feelings, showing others that they love and care about them. For them, it’s not for random people. In addition, a married woman told us when she was young, she loved hugs, and she loved to hug everyone. But after becoming one’s wife, she thinks her body only belongs to her family, especially her husband. So now, she only hugs people she knows and who are females.

According to our survey, most people think that they would give free hugs to people because they think it’s meaningful. But approximately 12% to 13% of people would check strangers’ appearance first. Some girls told us if the guys are good looking, they would hug them without a hesitation. A few people love the idea of surprising people with a hug. They think touching is important!

14% meaningful activity 30% international etiquette 16% not sure it's motivation appearance and gender I'm shy 8% 7% I love hugs others 12% 13%

Figure 3 Reasons why westerners give hugs to strangers

8

PDF created with pdfFactory trial version www.pdffactory.com An Expression of Love - Hugs

meaninful activity 15% 21% international etiquette not sure it's 17% motivation 15% appearance and gender 13% I'm shy 19% I love hugs

Figure 4 Reasons why easterners give hugs to strangers

Conclusion

Hug is not only a movement of body touching but an action of connecting people, and mostly it has positive influences on people. The “Free Hugs” campaign was started by Juan Mann whose purpose was to lighten random people’s life with a big warm hug in public settings. Due to the modern technology, especially the website “Youtube”, the popularity of free hugs has increased sharply. Westerners and easterners are both crazy about “Free Hugs”. As we personally experienced free hugs, we were surprised by the powerful bonds of hugs and touched by the inspirations that people gave us.

Hugs also can take the evil away and give heartiness. Hugs are seen as an international language. Besides using the spoken language, we should also be aware of this silent but powerful language, enjoying the warmth while we’re hugging people. When we are not able to speak or there are too much for us to say such as in sadly saying-goodbye situations or the long-awaited reunions, the best way to express our love and appreciations is to open our arms and give them a deep hug first. Our survey results show the stereotype of expressing love by body language, which somehow exists between the east and the west. There’s a little difference between the east and the west. Orientals have lesser hugs with people daily, but sometimes they still hug each other to receive or give comforts.

We didn’t know a simple hug can have a great impact on people until we finished this thesis. It makes us cherish and appreciate every received hug. Also, it helps us find a new way to comfort friends in depression when we don’t know what to say but want them to know we’ll always be at their side supporting them and sincerely hope

9

PDF created with pdfFactory trial version www.pdffactory.com An Expression of Love - Hugs

they’ll soon recover from the gloomy weather. The “Free Hugs” campaign assisted us to build up self-confidence, and it lets us realize that our hugs are priceless and have the power of lighting up others’ day. Asking random people to give hugs and fill out the survey on streets enhance our courage of doing things better. Nobody has every said doing research project is an easy job, and with no doubt, it’s not. Because of the challenge, we are proud of ourselves that we finally accomplished this task and are able to widely use the knowledge into our daily life.

References

l 凱絲．琪婷 (2005)。彼此擁抱。(黃漢耀譯)。台北市:張老師文化。 l . Retrieved November 17, 2009, from http://www.freehugscampaign.org/index.php?categoryid=1 l What are the purposes of hugs? (n.d.). Retrieved September 13, 2009 from http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/1436629 l Satir, V. (2004). Retrieved September 1, 2009, from http://thinkexist.com/quotes/virginia_satir/ l Study of touching behaviour in humans. (n.d.). Retrieved September 13, 2009, from http://psychology.wikia.com/wiki/Haptics l Hugs. (n.d.). Retrieved September 24, 2009, from http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/A603668 l 12 Hugs to Happiness. (n.d.). Retrieved September 24, 2009, from http://www.hugology.com/vicbearshugology12hugs.htm l Do you give different hugs to different people, or are all your hugs the same. (n.d.).Retrieved September 24, 2009, from http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/1218413 l Free hugs priceless in a culture of violence. (n.d.). Retrieved October 5, 2009, from http://www.news.com.au/free-hugs-priceless-in-a-culture-of-violence/story-0-111 1112309381 l A Hug a Day Keeps the Blues Away. (n.d.). Retrieved November 18, 2009, from http://www.easier.com/31293-a-hug-a-day-keeps-the-blues-away.html l The Rescuing Hug - The Healing Power of Touch. (n.d.). Retrieved November 18, 2009, from http://www.wellsphere.com/mind-body-article/the-rescuing-hug-the-healing-po wer-of-touch/427648

10

PDF created with pdfFactory trial version www.pdffactory.com