SEPTEMBER 2019 MONTHLY MUSE CONTENTS BEST ON THE WEB LISTEN UP LAUGH OUT LOUD YOU’VE GOT TO SEE THIS NERD STUFF WHAT’S GOING ON SMALL SCREEN, BIG SCREEN SOMETHING FOR THE LOO TALK OF THE TOWN DIGITAL LANDSCAPE LOOKING FORWARD

CLICK ON THE HEADER TO JUMP TO CONTENT KLAUS KREMMERZ HELLO HELLO HELLO SMALL SCREEN, BIG SCREEN SOMETHING FOR THE LOO TALK OF THE TOWN DIGITAL LANDSCAPE LOOKING FORWARD BEST ON THE WEB LISTEN UP LAUGH OUT LOUD YOU’VE GOT TO SEE THIS

NERD STUFF KLAUS KREMMERZ WHAT’S GOING ON PORNHUB LAUNCHES CAMPAIGN TO CLEAN OCEAN TRENDING

The filthy lads over at PornHub have decided to clean up their act - and the ocean. They’ve released the “Dirtiest Porn Ever”, a sexy vid set on a beach strewn with plastic. Throughout the film, people wearing PornHub-branded boiler suits clean up the mess around them (not that mess though, that’s some other poor bastard’s job). Every time the film’s played, a donation is made to Ocean Polymers, so watch it and do your bit!

CLICK HERE TO VIEW PLACE IMAGE HERE THIS ALPACA-HUMAN DANCE OFF DESERVES ITS OWN UWE BALTNER SOMEONE TO FOLLOW DISNEY MOVIE FUNNY VIRAL

The middle-aged German rap sensation has taken It’s a story as old as time. A human woman in a parka jacket and jogging bottoms. An excitable alpaca the web by storm with his high-energy covers of with nothing to lose. A dance off for the ages. One winner. One loser. One viral video. You watching it. hip hop and dancehall tunes. In all fairness, for a You wondering why you’re watching it. You losing your job for watching a dancing alpaca at work. You man who looks like either an EU negotiator or a unable to look your family in the eye. You packing your things up and deciding to embark on a life dentist, he can ride the beat like a pro MC. Give spent living in a van. You finding the freedom you’ve always dreamt about. him a follow and take a moment to enjoy perhaps the only funny German ever. Anyway, check out the video, it’s funny.

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PLACE IMAGE HERE WHY DO I LIVE IN A VAN? TRENDING ON YOUTUBE

The #VanLife is a trend that’s sweeping across YouTube and Instagram, as sustainable van-dwellers share their tales with millions of viewers. Jennelle Eliana has built up a huge following, as she details her life on the road with her pet snake. With soaring rent, the appeal of living in a van is growing ever more tempting - particularly if you’re a beautiful Instagrammer who lives in southern California.

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WHAT’S GOING ON KLAUS KREMMERZ SMALL SCREEN, BIG SCREEN STILL WOOZY RADIO RADIO

For the most chilled playlist on Spotify, check out Still Woozy Radio, featuring the eponymous Oakland artist and a whole host of others. As the summer winds down, give these tunes a listen and keep reliving the sweet memories of those five days it didn’t rain.

Warning: this playlist may make you so relaxed, you lose control of your body, your mind and ultimately, your bowels.

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DRAKE’S A$AP ROCKY RETURNS CARE PACKAGE AFTER PRISON NEW ALBUM NEW MUSIC VIDEO

Mr Drizzy Drake, Canada’s most famous export Having been freed from a Swedish prison by (sit down, maple syrup), has put out a collection Donald Trump is one of the year’s strangest news of odds and ends released between 2010 and stories, A$AP Rocky has dropped yet another 2016. Despite being a thinly veiled attempt to eye-catching video. Featuring pigs dressed as clean up yet more listens from a humongous and policemen and some unnerving prosthetics, ravenous fanbase, let’s be honest, these old tunes “Babushka Boi” depicts Rocky and his crew still slap. Curse you, Drake: you’re a corporate robbing banks and gunning down cops. Looks like machine with a winning smile and we’ll keep that prison stint really taught him a lesson! falling for it every time.

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SMALL SCREEN, BIG SCREEN KLAUS KREMMERZ SOMETHING FOR THE LOO EMOTIONAL STUNTMAN WITH BRADLEY WHITFORD - FULL DIRECTOR’S CUT FUNNY OR DIE

According to these Funny or Die short, it turns out Bradley Whitford, AKA the dad in Get Out, has been taking the emotional brunt for every actor in Hollywood for the last thirty years.

Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lecter? That was Bradley. Jack Nicholson in The Shining? PLACE Also Bradley. Bryan Cranston in Breaking Bad? Some of Bradley’s finest work.

Check out the full video here for a fascinating insight into Hollywood and also to save you IMAGE having to Google Bradley Whitford.

HERE

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE PERILS OF INSTAGRAM - THIS ROCK-PAPER-SCISSORS MATCH THROUGH A PLANE I THINK YOU SHOULD LEAVE WINDOW IS JUST THE BEST FUNNY VIRAL

In this sketch from Netflix’s excellently surreal “I Airports, as we all know, are same of the most boring places on Earth (closely followed by dentists’ Think You Should Leave”, we see the struggle of waiting rooms and the clothes department of Marks & Spencer). writing the perfect Instagram caption for your cute brunch pic with the girls. Crafting the perfect That’s why when this endearing video dropped of a man stuck on a runway playing rock, paper, humblebrag can be a little more challenging than scissors with an airport worker, it quickly went viral. It struck a chord with anyone who’s ever been it seems... driven insane with boredom by a delayed plane.

So while rock, paper, scissors may only have one victor, they’re both the real winners here.

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SOMETHING FOR THE LOO KLAUS KREMMERZ TALK OF THE TOWN THE STAINED CLUB SHORT FILM

Check out this hard-hitting short from the students of French animation school, Supinfocom Rubika. Beautifully crafted and already sweeping up a host of awards, it’s a complex and engaging piece that doesn’t need to do much to suck you fully into its world.

Once again it proves that naive characters and charming animation is one of the most affecting methods of exploring dark issues.

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THE WORLD’S LARGEST IOANNA SAKELLARAKI DATABASE OF CLIMATE EXPLORES GREECE’S LAST PROTEST POSTERS PROFESSIONAL MOURNERS PLACE DESIGN PHOTOGRAPHY This month, Glug, a creative events programme, is Ioanna Sakellaraki is more than just an excellent putting the most ingenious protest posters name. Check out her series focusing on the final recently designed at your fingertips. This giant professional mourners still working in Greece. IMAGE database will give you access to these climate Going all the way back to the ancient Greek change posters so you can help save the planet at tragedies, these tearful lads are able to weep a moment’s notice. Thanks guys! without even having to think about our political situation. HERE

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TALK OF THE TOWN KLAUS KREMMERZ DIGITAL LANDSCAPE SONY PS5 LAUNCH DATE WHICH GAME IS THE IGN COMMUNITY MOST LOOKING LEAKED IN INTERNAL EMAIL FORWARD TO AT GAMESCOM? GAME NEWS GAME LIST

Someone’s been naughty! A leaked email has Firstly, let’s get this out the way: yes, that is a semi-robotic Keanu Reeves of the future. And yes, we gone round that appears to announce that the can only hope this is what will be happening in 2077, rather than just the burning remains of the planet PS5 will be released on 21st February 2020 hurtling towards eternal damnation. (maybe). In other news, this article lists IGN’s games to look out for this Gamescom, including Pokemon Sword Of course, a leaked email should not be taken as & Shield and, of course, Luigi’s Mansion 3, the creepiest thing to happen in an Italian mansion since gospel, but it’s still sent the Sony nerds into Berlusconi’s bunga-bunga parties. meltdown.

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DIGITAL LANDSCAPE KLAUS KREMMERZ LOOKING FORWARD WILLIAM BLAKE: THE ARTIST EXHIBITION

William Blake. Poet. Painter. Candlestick-maker?

Alas, no. But the multi-talented legend is currently having his artwork exhibited at the Tate Britain and you’d be a fool to miss it. All the classics are on show, including the famous piece pictured below, entitled “Big Naked Lad Does His Maths Homework”. A true masterpiece.

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DOG SHOW LONDON DESIGN FESTIVAL ART EXHIBITION FESTIVAL

Check out this art show chosen by dogs (sort of) This month marks the capital’s biggest design for dogs (kind of) featuring nothing but dogs extravaganza of the year. The 2019 iteration of the (yes). festival will feature everything from a sunset under the sea to a fake Italian disco, so get on Among the art on display is work from David down there to experience it all. Shrigley, Joan Jonas and Lucien Freud. So if you’re a fan of canines and high culture then this is pretty much your dream event.

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LOOKING FORWARD KLAUS KREMMERZ BEST ON THE WEB IT: CHAPTER TWO FILM

The terrifying, big-foreheaded clown of your nightmares is back - no, not Piers Morgan - it’s Pennywise!

The sequel to IT is about to hit cinemas and the characters from Stephen King’s hit may be older, but they’re still being haunted by that cheeky little murderer who lives in the storm drains. What’s he like??

CLICK HERE TO VIEW PLACE IMAGE HERE TIMOTHEE CHALAMET AS THE IRISHMAN TRAILER (2019) KING HENRY FILM NEW TRAILER

Scorsese. De Niro. Pacino. Pesci. This isn’t the menu at an Italian restaurant, but instead a list of some Timothee Chalamet has a husky voice and a of the biggest names in the business, who are coming together for the most hotly anticipated Netflix bowl-cut. Robert Pattinson has a shoulder-length film yet. Can we wait? Forgeddabouuuuutit. blonde wig. Lots of people are being beheaded.

There’s a lot going on here and we’re intrigued. Based on the life of murderous mafioso, Frank Sheeran, it’s sure to involve plenty of guns, blood and

men eating pasta in their vests. Plus, it features a digitally de-aged De Niro, so you can see what he Netflix’s new medieval bloodbath has all the looked like twenty years ago! (Don’t bother just Googling it, this is much more fun.) ingredients to do some big numbers and we’re pretty damn excited to see it.

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BEST ON THE WEB KLAUS KREMMERZ LISTEN UP ‘THE SAUCE’ AND THE RISE THE BRAZILIAN BUTCHERS WHO TOOK OVER THE WORLD OF BRANDED PODCASTS THE BUREAU ON INVESTIGATIVE JOURNALISM NEW YORK TIMES

McDonald’s recent meta-podcast about the High-level corruption, animal welfare violations and major hygiene breaches. No, this isn’t a Monday disappearance of their own dipping sauce is just morning with Boris Johnson, it’s the story of the meatpacking mafia who’ve become some of the most the latest in a string of massive brands releasing powerful people in the world. their own podcasts. This fascinating investigation has lifted the lid on the many dubious goings-on and the rise of “dirty Give this article a read and find out why Facebook, meat” (ahem). Check it out and find out more about one of the biggest scandals you’ve probably never Microsoft and even New Balance have recently heard of. taken to the airwaves to reach out to customers.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW CLICK HERE TO VIEW WHY WORDS ARE VITAL TO THE CURIOUS QUEST TO CREATE THE UK'S FIRST ARTIFICIAL ADVERTISING SURFING BEACH CREATIVE REVIEW WIRED

If you’ve ever read any of these zany captions 20 minutes outside Bristol, a huge 70 acre wave pool is set to open this October, allowing you to throughout our Muse, you’ll be aware that they’re experience different waves from all across the world. obviously the best bit. It’s been created by a surfer/osteopath, who saw surfing as the ideal therapy, both physically and And this article agrees (well, not directly), insisting mentally. He described a Mediterranean beach environment as being the ideal image of that words are the most important creative aspect multi-generational community - so he’s moved that vibe to Bristol. of advertising. So take that, images! No-one cares about you anymore! Long live the copywriters! Just remember to include the mass sunburn to make it authentic.

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PLACE IMAGE HERE YOU’VE GOT TO SEE THIS NERD STUFF WHAT’S GOING ON SMALL SCREEN, BIG SCREEN SOMETHING FOR THE LOO TALK OF THE TOWN DIGITAL LANDSCAPE LOOKING FORWARD BEST ON THE WEB

LISTEN UP KLAUS KREMMERZ LAUGH OUT LOUD FIRST ADS BANNED FOR CONTRAVENING UK GENDER STEREOTYPING RULES THE GUARDIAN

A Philadelphia cream-cheese advert depicting bungling dads and a VW ad showing a woman sat with a pram have become the first to fall foul of new UK gender stereotyping rules.

They may be pretty strict, but these new rules are sure to enrage middle-aged dads across the country, which is always a comical bonus.

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ICELAND HOLDS FUNERAL THE FOODS YOU'LL REALLY FOR FIRST GLACIER LOST TO NEED TO STOCKPILE FOR A CLIMATE CHANGE NO-DEAL BREXIT THE GUARDIAN WIRED

The Icelandic Prime Minister has helped unveil a Turns out that after a no deal Brexit, we’d be a bit plaque marking the melting of its first glacier. With short on milk, meat, fruit, vegetables, chocolate all its other glaciers also expected to lose their and pretty much everything you enjoy eating. status in the next 200 years, the plaque contains a letter to future generations. In fact, we now import 40% of our food, so we can look forward to subsisting purely on stewed Will we all succeed in averting this seemingly marrows and Greggs sausage rolls until we all die. inevitable fate? Let’s bloody hope so. Fantastic news.

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YOU’VE GOT TO SEE THIS KLAUS KREMMERZ NERD STUFF EATING & ENTERTAINMENT DRINKING

While Spotify and Apple Music boast As people seek to better understand broad catalogues and tailored their individual dietary needs and recommendations, alternative music adapt their meals accordingly, eating streaming platforms are finding out is becoming something of a success, as some people seek to minefield. Catering to various food connect with regional artists. Music restrictions – from gluten to meat to PLACE RELEVANT consumption has become dairy – is a challenge for many dining digital-first, with discovery driven by establishments and even more so in-app suggestions and tailored when potentially deadly allergies are IMAGE HERE recommendations. involved.

CLICK HERE TO READ MORE CLICK HERE TO READ MORE LUXURY

The joy of popping tags from box-fresh products is diminishing slightly as people show a greater appreciation for second-hand treasures. Increasingly TECHNOLOGY SHOPPING conscious of the ethical and environmental impact of their purchases, many shoppers are embracing pre-loved goods and rental services to experience high-quality trappings in a more sustainable manner.

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Whether it’s scrolling Instagram for Sales of vegan products have given food inspo, checking work emails Dr Martens a kick in the right while on the bus, or Googling direction. Profits at the footwear medical concerns, the online world is brand loved by skinheads and goths omnipresent in modern life. But with alike were up by 70% in the year to an abundance of apps at our March. This amounts to around 5% of the company’s total sales, PLACE RELEVANT fingertips, many people are feeling overwhelmed. To counter this, some showing that slowly but surely, vegan are looking to digitally declutter and leather seems to be on the rise. make space for new ways of living that carry less of a mental health toll. IMAGE HERE

CLICK HERE TO READ MORE CLICK HERE TO READ MORE [email protected] CHEERIO DONTPANICLONDON.COM

SEPTEMBER 2019 MONTHLY MUSE