SOMEONE YOU LOVE Bookletxx
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Someone You Love Someone You Love Someone You Love FUNDED BY : AIDS TRUST OF AUSTRALIA, FRUITS IN SUITS, LOTTERYWEST, Information for Parents, Families and COMMONWEALTH DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH AND AGED CARE Friends of Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual or AN INITIATIVE OF THE ‘HERE FOR LIFE’ YOUTH Transgender people SEXUALITY PROJECT 1997, WA AIDS COUNCIL. 2 FUNDED BY : AIDS TRUST OF AUSTRALIA, FRUITS IN SUITS, LOTTERYWEST, Someone You Love COMMONWEALTH DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH AND AGED CARE A letter from PFLAG (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) This book has been include, PFLAG, The children are coming out written to assist Freedom Centre, The to their parents, hence parents, families and AIDS Council and the Gay more parents are seeking friends of lesbians, gay and Lesbian Community support and information. men, bisexuals, Service. You will always be transgendered and PFLAG has a voluntary welcome at our groups. intersex people (GLBTI) with the sometimes Helpline that is staffed Giz Watson and Dianne every day. We have an difficult process of Guise have been great office that is staffed each coming to terms with support to us during the Thursday afternoon. We the changes that are Parliamentary debates on taking place in the lives have a small library of the proposed changes to of the children whom books on GLBTI issues. legislation. they love. We meet on the second Saturday of each month We hope that reading this It is important to at Women’s Health Care book will be a positive remember that they are House, at 1.30pm. still the same children move for you towards Please feel free to that you loved yesterday, developing a deeper contact us, use the before you learned understanding and library or attend our something new about support for your child or meetings. them. Most people have loved one. strong feelings about As a result of the recent their children’s sexuality. changes to the legislation Pat Wilson, President, Many parents go through in this state, more PFLAG WA Inc. a process similar to grief. For the first few weeks Copyright: ‘Here for Life’ Special thanks to all Produced by the ‘Here for you may find yourself Youth Sexuality Project the families who Life’ Youth Sexuality Project crying a lot, and not 1997, WA AIDS Council. shared themselves Team: Graham Brown, Pia knowing where to turn for Not to be reprinted or through the comments Coates and Melissa Gillett. help. You may feel that reproduced without and photographs in Revised and reprinted by you are the only person permission. this book. PFLAG members January who has a GLBTI child. Thanks to Parents, 2004 A joint project of the Gay But you are not alone, Families and Friends of and Lesbian Community Photography by Nadine and there are Lesbians and Gays Toussaint Service (WA) and the WA organisations that can (WA), all the young ph: 0412 866 658 AIDS Council. Funded by help you through these people at the Freedom [email protected] the Commonwealth Centre, all the youth difficult times. These Department of Health and workers and Design by Lauren Willhelm, Family Services ‘Here for counsellors and Designmine Pty Ltd Life’ Youth Suicide everyone who assisted Prevention Initiative. with this book. 3 4 The answer to "what people, behave in all kinds Do lesbians really want causes someone to be of ways. Stereotypes and to be men and gay men GLBTI is probably the assumptions arise out of really want to be same as the answer to ignorance and prejudice. women? Common "what causes someone to Sometimes a stereotype be heterosexual?" The about a group doesn’t fit The very nature of same Questions research so far has anyone in that group, sex relationships provides highlighted only one thing - sometimes it fits a few an impetus away from about GLBTI - we do NOT know what people, sometimes more. rigid gender roles and Before we get started we’d like to clarify People causes anyone's sexual But a stereotype never fits stereotypes. However the meaning of some of the words used in orientation. Gay, lesbian, everyone in any group. this has nothing to do How many GLBTI people this book. transgender and bisexual Physical appearance and with wanting to be the are there? people have been raised in opposite gender. Heterosexual : People whose sexual and romantic mannerisms have nothing all kinds of homes, as feelings are primarily for the opposite sex. The number of young to do with a person’s Transgender (or have heterosexual people. people who are attracted sexuality, they are part of transexual) people do not What is clear is that this Homosexual : People whose sexual and romantic to people of the same their personality. identify with the sex or feelings are primarily for the same sex. People who is a complex, multi-faceted gender is generally gender they were born feel this way often identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. issue. believed to be Do GLBTI people have with. This has to do with approximately about 10% more sexual partners Gay : People whose sexual and romantic feelings are Is Homosexuality the feeling of not being of the population (2). than heterosexual people? primarily for the same sex. In Australia this can mean natural? born into the right Estimates vary depending men or women, though tends to be used mainly for GLBTI share the same physical body. Confusion men who identify themselves as gay. on the comfort levels of Being GLBTI is as natural amount of interest in about one’s gender is a people being surveyed. and as healthy as being sexual activity as very real issue, but does Lesbian : Women whose sexual and romantic feelings That works out to be one heterosexual. For the heterosexual people, not necessarily have are primarily for other women. person in every extended approximately 200,000 neither more nor less. anything to do with family. Sexual and people in Australia who Bisexual or Bi : Refers to people whose sexual and Just like the heterosexual sexuality or sexual romantic feelings are for both men and women. romantic relations are GLBTI, it is a natural between people of the part of who they are, and community, the GLBTI orientation. Being gay, Transgender : People who do not identify with the sex same gender have been for them to be community has a diverse lesbian or bisexual or gender with which they were born. This has to do found in every known heterosexual would be range of lifestyles and doesn’t mean someone is with the feeling of not being born into the right culture and religion in unnatural. The vast relationships. transsexual or physical body. transgender, and being society. It happens in majority of psychologists Maintaining relationships is every social, economic, and psychiatrists consider transexual or Intersex : An individual who has characteristics of often more difficult for it unethical to try to transgender doesn’t both sexes. racial, and religious same gender couples, as change a person’s sexual make someone gay, group. People who feel society does not provide this way are in all orientation. (3) lesbian or bisexual. (For Homophobia : An individual’s or society’s any of the supports for misunderstanding, ignorance or fear of gay, lesbian or professions, they are our (3) USA Psychiatric Association; USA more information on Psychological Association; British these relationships that it bisexual people. friends, our families and transgender issues, ask Psychiatric Association provides to heterosexual our colleagues. We all the organisations listed Coming Out : A phrase that can mean something couples. No social, legal, know a number of GLBTI Can you identify GLBTI at the back of this book different to everyone. It has to do with developing an or religious support is people, but we may not people by the way they for referrals.) awareness that you are gay, lesbian or bisexual. This provided and often no be aware of it. behave and dress? often leads to being more open with others about family support. With the sexual identity. Do gay men abuse (2) Bell,A and Weinberg,M (1978) GLBTI look and act so high rates of divorce Homosexualities : A Study Of Diversity children? Sexual Orientation and Sexuality : The direction of Among Men and Women. New York, much like everyone else amongst heterosexual sexual and romantic attractions. For some this is Simon and Schuster. that most people assume marriages, it's probably Paedophilia and other mainly towards people of the opposite sex, for some it What causes someone they are heterosexual. amazing that so many forms of child abuse is mainly towards people of the same sex and for to be gay, lesbian, Gay, lesbian, transgender same gender couples do occur mainly in the home some it is towards either sex. transgender or bisexual? and bisexual people, like all stay together. environment by a family 5 6 Continued overpage > Common Questions asked thinking this through for guilt when they first find and their families may months, even years. This out about their child or have very real and by families concerning does not mean a lack of loved one’s attractions legitimate fears and trust, lack of love, neither for the same gender. concerns. member. 95% of child their loved ones is it a reflection on your However, there is no abuse is carried out by relationship. If you are a evidence that different Could a counsellor or heterosexual identifying Why did they have to tell transgender or bisexual parent it can be painful to parenting styles or family therapist be helpful? people.(4) realise that you don’t situations have a bearing me? was a conscious decision.