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Congratulations on Your Engagement!

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Congratulations on Your Engagement! Congratulations on your engagement! It is our responsibility prior to witnessing your wedding vows to ensure that you and your fiancé (fiancée) understand that the Sacrament of Marriage is a vocation, a promise of love and fidelity to one person for your entire life and that your wedding day celebrates the beginning of your life as husband and wife. Everything about the celebration should help you, your families and your guests experience the presence and blessing of God. Anything that is not appropriate for prayer in a holy place is not appropriate for your celebration in the church. Hopefully this document will help you as you prepare for this new and exciting step in your life. Scheduling Weddings are celebrated at St. Michael Parish for active members and members of their families. (Active members of St. Michael Parish are those who are registered, contributing and participating in the life and worship of the parish community.) Only one wedding is celebrated at St. Michael’s on any given weekend. Weddings are NOT celebrated during Lent or Advent, or on any date that conflicts with a previously scheduled diocesan or parish event. Weddings are scheduled at 1:00pm on Saturdays, or on Friday evenings between 4:30 – 6pm. Please contact Donna in the Parish Office at least six months prior to the desired wedding date to reserve the church. (Only engaged couples should contact the office regarding scheduling.) A $100 non-refundable deposit is due within two weeks of this arrangement to secure the date on the church calendar. Once you have reserved the church, you and your fiancé (fiancée) will be contacted by one of the parish priests for an appointment to begin your series of meetings establishing your marriage file with the church. Please note: If you or your fiancé (fiancée) have been in a previous marriage, no date can be set for your wedding until you have received a declaration of nullity from the diocese. Documents Catholics will need a new copy (issued within the last six months) of their baptismal certificate, with sacramental notations. To obtain a recent copy of your baptismal certificate, simply call the church where you were baptized and ask to have a copy sent to you or directly to the church. Non-Catholics who have been baptized must get a copy of their baptismal certificate or a letter from their church of baptism also. (This certificate does not have to be newly-issued.) Copies of the baptismal records should be presented to the priest at the first scheduled appointment. A marriage license from the state of West Virginia must be obtained from the Ohio County Courthouse and presented to the parish office one month prior to the wedding. Once you obtain the marriage license from the courthouse, it is only valid for 60 days. Therefore, do not pick up your marriage license too early. Please note: The priest cannot legally perform a wedding without the marriage license. Marriage Preparation The necessary preparation for the marriage involves two parts: 1) a series of meetings with the priest to compile the marriage file and 2) the couple’s preparation through either an engaged couples weekend or participation in the parish sponsor couple program. If the couple preparing for marriage lives outside of the parish or outside of the diocese, the couple should complete their marriage file in the parish or diocese of their current residence. The file should be forwarded to our parish at least one month in advance of the wedding with all the necessary permissions included. In addition to the necessary meetings with a parish priest to complete the necessary paperwork, all couples preparing for marriage participate in some form of a marriage preparation program. St. Michael Parish offers a program called Together in God’s Love as one means of providing this preparation. In this program, an experienced couple meets with an engaged couple five or six times over the course of two or three months to share reflections on topics of value to the engaged couple, 1 such as communication, problem solving, finances, children, differences in expectations due to upbringing, and religious practice. Another option provided by our diocese is the Preparing for Christian Marriage Weekend for Engaged Couples. This retreat program, led by a team of married couples and limited to 15 engaged couples, is an opportunity for engaged couples to spend time in a retreat setting (6pm Friday to Noon Sunday) which affords the opportunity for interactive as well as reflective sessions, presentations, conversations and prayer . Information along with dates and locations can be found by accessing the diocesan website www.dwc.org/pfcm or emailing Rebecca Royse, Director of the Office of Faith Formation - Marriage & Family Life, at [email protected]. Most dioceses and many parishes offer other marriage programs that are accepted by St. Michael Parish in lieu of the couples’ weekend or sponsor couple process offered here. If you and your fiancé (fiancée) can more conveniently arrange for marriage preparation elsewhere, please contact our parish for approval of the program you would like to use. Proof of participation in a marriage preparation program needs to be provided to the parish office for your marriage file. Wedding Celebration St. Michael Parish does not provide facilities for dressing prior to the wedding. The wedding is a liturgical celebration in the Roman Catholic Church which highlights the union two people have found in Christ. If both parties are of our Catholic tradition, celebration of marriage in the context of the Mass is expected. However, if either bride or groom is not of our Catholic tradition, it may be better to celebrate the marriage in the context of the Liturgy of the Word which allows everyone to participate fully. Couples are provided with a resource book entitled Together For Life by Joseph M. Champlin to assist them in the preparation of the ceremony. The usual ministries for the celebration include altar servers, reader(s), gift bearers and extraordinary ministers of Holy Communion. It is highly desirable that members of the wedding party, families or guests participate actively in the celebration. If you would like St. Michael Church to supply altar servers, there is a fee of $15 per server that is due one month before the wedding. Extraordinary ministers of Holy Communion must be officially commissioned in order to participate. The lighting and use of a unity candle is not a part of the liturgy of the Church. Your unity as a married couple comes via the vows you exchange with one another and the celebration of the Eucharist. However, due to its popularity, the unity candle may be used at St. Michael’s as a visual sign of your unity if desired. However, it is your responsibility to provide the candles and holder if you choose to use one. The use of alcohol on church property prior to the rehearsal or wedding is strictly prohibited. If either the bride or groom arrives at the church intoxicated on their wedding day, the wedding ceremony WILL NOT take place as this would interfere with their freedom to consent to marriage. The suggested personal stipend to the priest is $75 and can be presented directly to him at any time. Music Music is an essential component of the wedding liturgy and enhances the joy of the celebration. Once a wedding is on the church calendar, Chad Carter, the parish Music Director, will contact the couple regarding music selections and arrangements. His approval of the music assures us that the Church’s directives on appropriate music are met and copyrights observed, as well as providing music selections that will encourage participation by the assembly. Couples are expected to pay for the services of musicians & singers. 2 Rehearsal The wedding rehearsal, conducted by the priest officiating at your wedding, takes place on the evening prior to the wedding. It is assumed that conduct at both the rehearsal and the ceremony will be reverent and fitting for the sacred space. The wedding rehearsal must be attended by those participating in the wedding ceremony; typically, this includes the bride, groom, bridesmaids, groomsmen, parents, readers, or anyone else who may have a role in the ceremony. Attire for the rehearsal should be respectful of the holy space; gum chewing, the wearing of caps by the men, and the use of alcohol prior to the rehearsal are prohibited. Worship Environment /Floral Arrangements for St Michael Parish Seasonal decorations already in the church may not be altered. Floral arrangements can be placed around the candles next to the altar or on the high altar (in the rear of the sanctuary) beside the tabernacle. If you are providing any flowers, please consider allowing them to remain in the church for the weekend Masses. Only freshly cut flowers and greens may be used in the Church. It is your responsibility to arrange for family members/friends to be at the church to accept all floral deliveries on the day of the wedding. The use of an aisle runner is not permitted in the Church. (Our center aisle is carpeted and additional runners on top of it may constitute a tripping hazardous.) Pew decorations must be attached by pipe cleaners, string, ribbon or elastic. Tape, glue or other adhesives may not be used on the pews. Arrangements should be made by the family to remove any decorations which you choose to keep immediately following the ceremony. Anything remaining once you have left will be thrown away. Balloons and bubbles are not permitted either inside or outside of the church. Likewise, the throwing or releasing of rice, bird seed, flower petals, confetti, etc.
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