For Supporters

10 Things Not to Say to a Quitter

By the Quitter's Circle Staff June 08, 2015

It’s important to know how to be a good supporter to those quitting smoking. Maybe you have a smoker in your life who you wish could quit smoking for good. Or perhaps you are a smoker and your smoking buddy has just let you know he or she won’t be joining you on smoke breaks anymore. No matter what the situation, here are 10 things not to say to a friend or loved one who is quitting smoking.

1. “So, you’re ‘quitting’…again”

If a family member or friend is a smoker, odds are they have tried to quit before. Be supportive and leave the naysaying out of the convo. Just be proud that they’re still trying to quit! Past quit attempts are not failures, but practice for success.

2. “Do you mind if I smoke?”

Smokers can still support a friend who is nixing cigarettes, but be respectful. Do the quitter a favor and avoid smoking nearby. And definitely don't offer a quitter a cigarette or ask them to hold onto your cig even if you miss having a smoking buddy.

3. “I know exactly what you’re going through!”

No two quits are the same. You can’t know what someone else’s quit experience is like or what he or she needs without asking. So ask!

4. “Are you nervous about gaining weight?”

Don’t remind a quitter of any difficulties in swearing off cigarettes. Instead, offer to exercise together or cook a healthy meal.

5. “Great, you’re just going to be grumpy all the time now.”

Yeah, ok, a quitter may not feel like their best self—but only temporarily. Even if you get some attitude from your recent quitter, tell them that you understand the struggle is real and gently remind them that it won’t last forever.

6. “If you don’t cut it out for good, we’re through.”

Skip the ultimatums and instead let the quitter in your life know you’ll be there for them no matter what. 7. “I quit a while ago—you just have to want it enough.”

Quitting smoking is about more than willpower. Instead of bragging about your own success or downplaying the struggles of quitting, recognize that no two quit attempts are alike. Let the quitter know how happy you are to have them join the smokefree team.

8. “Now you never have to think of another cigarette ever again!”

That’s like telling someone they won’t think about food when they’re hungry and standing next to a buffet. When someone is leaving smoking behind, unfortunately, the rest of the world doesn’t follow suit. Recognize the daily strength needed to stay smokefree.

9. “But you’ve smoked for so long already. What’s the point in quitting?”

It’s never too late to quit. After just one day smokefree a smoker’s risk for heart attack decreases; after two days, senses of taste and smell return to normal; after one to nine months smokefree, lungs begin to repair themselves. That’s a lot of upside to remind a smoker of.

10. “A couple puffs won’t kill you.”

As much as losing a smoking buddy can be difficult to accept—smoking can be a very social experience—don’t undo your friend’s smokefree success with peer pressure. When people are quitting smoking, it’s a lot easier to have none than one. Ex-smokers can still be friends with smokers, just in a new way.

- See more at: https://www.quitterscircle.com/story/10-things-not-to-say-to-a-quitter#sthash.RQtXrOON.dpuf