TRINITY CHRISTIAN REFORMED CHURCH: POLICY & PROCEDURE MANUAL Safe Church Policy Section: Care & Fellowship File No. 3090-00

Approval: [FC 2008.07.17/16] Effective Date: July 17, 2008

Coverage: Council / Staff / Volunteers Review Date: July 2010 AC

Safe Church Policy for Persons at Risk

Trinity Christian Reformed Church Abbotsford, BC

Content

1. Biblical and Theological Affirmations pg. 3 Biblical Perspective

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes Affirmations

2. Principles pg. 3 Covenant Treatment of Persons: Reporting Supervision Training Accountability

3. Policy Statement pg. 4 A. Preamble B. Purpose C. Definitions D. Safe Church Committee E. Ministry Staff/Volunteer(s) F. Records Administration G. Education H. Discipline Matters a. Handling Discipline b. Discipline Guidelines

4. Specific Program Guidelines pg. 8 A. Nursery Program B. Children’s Church School C. Bible School, Coffee Break and other Ministries Involving Children D. GEMS and CADETS E. Youth Groups F. Office Bearers

5. Procedure for Handling Abuse Reports pg. 11 1. Introduction 2. Responding to Signs, Symptoms and Reports of Abuse 3. Reporting Procedures 4. Suspected Abuse by Staff/Volunteer of a Minor, Youth, Adult, or Senior Person

Appendix 1: Signs and Symptoms of Child Abuse pg. 13 Appendix 2: Responding to a Child’s Report of Abuse pg. 15 Appendix 3: Reporting Abuse (child under 19) pg. 15 Appendix 4: Responding to Parent(s) who are notified of an Abuse Report pg. 16 Appendix 5: Responding to Adult Abuse Complaints pg. 16 Appendix 6: Liability Insurance pg. 17

For further details of DENOMINATIONAL POLICY see ACTS OF SYNOD 1997 and following.

1. Biblical and Theological Affirmations

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 2 Biblical Perspective a. God created persons in the Divine Image, male and female (Gen. 1:26-27). b. Women and men are equal in the sight of God (Gal. 3:28). c. The human body is good. Human sexuality is an integral part of our humanity and is profoundly personal. Its physical, emotional and spiritual expression in relation to another person of the opposite sex in a marital relationship ought to be based on a loving commitment and accountability to both God and the other (1 Cor. 3:16 & 6:19; 2 Cor. 6:16). d. Human sexuality is also social and can become the basis for oppression and injustice, violating the intention of God’s loving good order (1. Cor. 5). e. God calls persons to wholeness through Jesus Christ and to participation in the Body of Christ, the community of faith, whose quality is redemptive love (1 John).

Affirmations  In the light of the above statements Trinity Christian Reformed Church (Trinity CRC) affirms the following:  Trinity CRC seeks to live the new life in Christ. It is our hope that our church community will be a place showing God’s presence in the world.  Therefore, we strive to create in our church an environment that nurtures each person’s dignity and safety so that everyone can grow and mature as the Creator intended.  We acknowledge, however, that we live in a broken world, and that one of the signs of that brokenness is the violation of boundaries for healthy relationships. When sin of this nature occurs, appropriate action is required.  We must strive to achieve justice, protect victims, promote the healing of those who have been abused, and work towards the repentance and healing of the abuser.

2. Principles

COVENANT In keeping with Biblical and Reformed principles, Trinity CRC is committed to an environment that is characterized by mutual concern and respect among all members of the body of Christ, children, youth, adults and seniors.

TREATMENT OF PERSONS Sexual, physical, emotional and spiritual abuse includes, but is not limited to, making unwelcome sexual advances; corporal punishment; threatening, shaming, or humiliating; engaging in improper physical contact; making improper sexual comment or jokes; making a person’s submission to such conduct a term or condition of one’s participation in extracurricular activities; or otherwise creating an intimidating, hostile, or offensive environment. All children, youth, adults and seniors are expected to refrain from such conduct and treat others with Christian dignity.

REPORTING All Council members, staff, volunteers, or anyone in a position to represent Trinity CRC are required to follow existing legislation when reporting any suspected incidents of abuse to child welfare or police authorities. They should also notify the Safe Church Committee (SCC) of Trinity CRC or seek their advice as appropriate. All complaints of abuse and harassment shall be promptly investigated.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 3 The SCC shall ensure that legal reporting requirements are met. All records that are kept of the report shall remain confidential and secure.

SUPERVISION Two persons (staff or volunteers) must be present during any session involving a child(ren) (12 and under) and as much as possible for youth, adult and seniors programs offered in Trinity CRC. This is meant as protection of the child/youth and the staff/volunteer.

Volunteers shall be members (baptized or confessed) of the Trinity CRC for a minimum of 6 months before they can serve in the area of youth and children’s ministry. Volunteers, confessed or baptized members of a Christian church, wishing to serve in various programs and recommended by the ministry head, will be interviewed by SCC. On completion of the interview process the SCC will make a recommendation to the Church Council or Administration Committee regarding the appointment.

The nursery has to be supervised by at least two staff/volunteers in the same room. These individuals are not to be a married couple unless a third non-related person is also present.

TRAINING Because the dynamics of abuse are present in every culture and community, there is benefit and necessity for everyone involved in ministry to participate in training on a yearly basis. Mandatory training sessions will be held preferably in the 1st week of September to be attended by all staff/volunteers that would like to be involved in ministry during the coming year. Supplementary training can be arranged as required. . ACCOUNTABILITY Trinity CRC is committed to enforce this Safe Church Policy at all levels within the church. Conduct, which genuinely disregards or violates the described policies will not be tolerated. If a complaint is substantiated, appropriate disciplinary and corrective action will be taken.

3. Policy Statement A. Preamble Living with abuse, neglect and harassment is a reality for many people, young and old. Studies and statistics today indicate an incidence of abuse within the church is equal to that of the general population.

“It has become fairly well accepted that approximately one in four girls and one in five boys have experienced some type of sexual abuse before their eighteenth birthday.” (Safe Place Handbook Guidelines With Focus on Safety and Abuse)

“People with disabilities report sexual and emotional abuse at rates double, even triple to those persons without disabilities.” (Report 28, Synod, 1992 CRC Committee)

Sadly, in our society, people are often not given enough credibility when/if they do disclose. The Church’s desire must be to educate others and ourselves around the issue of abuse so as to recognize the signs, respond appropriately, support the survivor and remain accountable to one another for our actions. Above all, we must be seriously concerned with the need of protection for the victim of abuse. It may also be required that the situation reported may involve criminal charges in order that the victim may be protected and that the perpetrator be brought to justice.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 4 B. Purpose The Church has a spiritual, moral and legal obligation to provide a secure, safe environment for adults and children participating in the Church’s programs.

This policy is intended to assist the Church’s staff and volunteers (including office- bearers) in  Preventing the abuse of a person;  Preventing staff/volunteer(s) from being falsely accused; and  Preventing the Church from losing its witness of the gospel.

It is hoped that the policies herein will further the reality of the Church as a “sanctuary” and a place of ministry. Abuse of anyone must be condemned and eradicated from the Church’s organization.

C. Definitions 1. “Physical Abuse” is any non-accidental human act that results in physical pain or injury to a person whether or not it leaves a cut or wound, or a mark or a bruise. Physically abusive behaviour ranges from slapping, pushing, shoving, punching, kicking, and biting to more severe forms like choking, severe spanking, beating, hitting with an object, burning, stabbing, and shooting. In other words, physical abuse is any intentional means of inflicting pain or injury to another person. It is sometimes a single event, but can also be a chronic pattern of behaviour. 2. “Physical Neglect” is not doing what one is supposed to be doing to meet the physical needs of someone in his or her care. Neglect interferes with or prevents a person’s normal development. 3. “Sexual Abuse” is the exploitation of, or any sexual intimacy forced on a person for the sexual stimulation or gratification of another person. Sexual abuse can refer to taking advantage of a person who is not capable of understanding sexual acts or resisting coercion such as threats or offers of gifts. Sexual abuse may or may not involve physical contact. Examples of non-physical sexual abuse include people exposing themselves, displaying pornographic material, photographing a person for pornographic materials, obscene telephone calls, “peeping Toms”, and requests to engage in sexual activity (where no physical contact occurs). Examples of sexual abuse involving physical contact include fondling of body parts such as breasts, crotch, buttocks, or sexual organs, intercourse, oral and anal sex. 4. “Emotional Abuse” is attempting to control a person’s life through words, threats, and fear, destroying a person’s self-worth through harassment, threats, and deprivation. Emotional abuse weakens a person’s mental and physical ability to resist, cuts off his or her contacts with others, and causes a gradual loss of self- esteem all of which reinforce a sense of helplessness and dependence on the abuser. 5. “Children, youth or minors” are individuals under the age of 19 years. 6. “Volunteers” are non-paid individuals who serve in a child, youth, adult or seniors program and/or who have direct contact with these persons in their care or supervision. 7. “Staff” is individuals paid by the church who serve in a child, youth, adult or seniors program and/or who have direct contact with these persons in their care or supervision. 8. “Child, Family and Community Service Act” is the legislated law of British Columbia that speaks to Child Protection (part 3).

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 5 D. Safe Church Committee 1. The SCC will be comprised of six (6) members based on the following criteria: a. Members in good standing at Trinity CRC b. Three (3) year term with optional renewal at Council’s discretion c. Term of office to be staggered to provide stability and continuity d. Committee to be comprised of three (3) females and two (2) males at large from the congregation and one (1) Council member representative (non-staff member). e. Members who resign from the SCC must submit their resignation to the Church Council. The Church Council is responsible for appointments to the committee.

2. The SCC will be responsible for all steps involved in the application, screening, reference checks and acceptance of volunteers and in providing advice and recommendation with respect to staff. a. Interviews (as per section E. 3.) are to be conducted by at least two (2) of the six (6) members present with both genders represented. b. Confidential files on each staff/volunteer are to be maintained in a secure place and will contain the following: 1. Staff/Volunteer Form (see enclosed) 2. Reference Form (see enclosed) 3. Criminal Record Check Form 4. Observations by interviewers c. Access to these files is restricted to the members of the SCC and can only be opened in the presence of a minimum of two (2) committee members. 3. Decisions regarding acceptance/rejection of volunteers will be made by the full SCC. a. The full standing committee is the first level of appeal. Church Council is the final level of appeal. b. No applicant with a history of child abuse or assault will be accepted to serve in ministry. c. The church reserves the right to reject any applicant for any reason. The applicant may appeal.

E. Ministry Staff/Volunteer(s) 1. All staff and volunteers are required to complete an application form, as prescribed by Council. 2. All applicants will be required to give the names of two references to complete a Personal Reference Information Form in a format prescribed by Council. 3. All staff and volunteers will be interviewed by members of the SCT, as designated by Council. 4. All adult staff and adult volunteers who direct children, youth, adult and seniors ministries shall complete a Criminal Record Check. Other adult staff and adult volunteers who work in particularly sensitive ministries may be requested to complete a Criminal Record Check. 5. All staff and volunteers must be members (baptized or confessed) of the Trinity CRC or members (baptized or confessed) of other churches who have been approved by both the ministry head and Church Council or Administration Committee (for procedure see p.4 under “Supervision”). 6. All staff and volunteers must agree to comply with the Church’s Safe Church policy and, if non-compliant, the individual will be required to relinquish his/her responsibility in the program.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 6 7. The Church will reduce the risks with-in one-to-one contact by: a. Two persons (staff or volunteers) must be present during any session involving a child(ren)(12 and under) and as much as possible for youth, adult and seniors programs. b. Notifying a parent or guardian to obtain his/her permission to meet alone in a planned one-to-one contact with their child, youth, or dependent. c. Requiring a parent to sign consent that his/her child may be transported alone. d. Generally two persons (staff or volunteers) must be present to transport children (12 and under) in a church vehicle and/or in a staff/volunteer(s) vehicle, and as much as possible for youth, adults and seniors. e. Ensuring that meeting room doors have windows that allow for observation of activities. f. One-to-one contact which takes place outside the church facility in the absence of a second staff/volunteer should occur in a public place.

F. Records Administration The SCC is responsible for maintaining appropriate records and addressing issues of confidentiality to meet legislative requirements.

G. Education 1. All staff/volunteer(s), involved in ministries shall familiarize themselves with the Safe Church Policy and participate annually in the Safe Church Training Session, led by a qualified individual(s), directed at issues of abuse, identification and reporting obligations. 2. Resource material will be made available upon request.

H. Discipline Matters a. Handling Discipline 1. Persons involved in programs may engage in behaviours that are disruptive or unacceptable. When these behaviours occur in church-sponsored programs, it is often a church staff/ volunteer(s) who must intervene. A staff/ volunteer(s) can interrupt or stop an unacceptable behaviour by mentoring which behaviours are acceptable and which are not. By example and over time, the staff/ volunteer person teaches how to behave in a socially acceptable way and in a manner that is Christ like. 2. When dealing with child(ren)/youth it may be appropriate for a staff/volunteer(s) to interrupt or stop an unacceptable behaviour by intervening with a mild form of discipline. This discipline is intended to “catch the child’s attention” and act as a deterrent and a reminder that certain behaviour is unacceptable. Inappropriate use of discipline can turn into abuse when pain, injury, or humiliation results, or when it is used excessively.

Some examples of excessive or abusive discipline are listed below: Abusive Physical Discipline a. Slapping, kicking, punching, hitting, choking, pushing, shoving, hair pulling, twisting, pinching. b. Discipline that leaves a bruise, mark, wound, or cut. c. Discipline administered with any device or object (such as a paddle, spoon, stick, book). Abusive Verbal Discipline a. Shouting or yelling, threatening, hurling insults or obscenities.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 7 b. Discipline that is intended to humiliate a child/youth. c. Discipline by refusing to speak to a child. d. Discipline that involves bribery, coercion, or threats. e. Discipline followed by a request/threat to the child/youth not to tell anyone what happened, not to report the discipline, or not to show anyone a mark or bruise.

b. Discipline Guidelines 1. Corporal punishment (slapping, hitting, and pushing) is not permitted. 2. Abusive verbal discipline (yelling, hurling insults, threatening) is not permitted. 3. Concerns about a child’s behaviour or the response to a child’s inappropriate behaviour should be reported to the program supervisor. 4. Expectations and discipline of children/youths’ behaviour must reflect their age and level of comprehension. 5. Children are to be reminded of the kind of behaviour that is acceptable for the setting. Older children and youth may benefit from having these expectations in written form. 6. Appropriate forms of discipline are to be reviewed with staff/ volunteers before church-sponsored programs begin a new season. Then periodic reminders are to be given as needed. 7. A staff/volunteer should be involved weekly in classrooms where misbehaviour is an ongoing problem. 8. Parent(s) are to be informed and involved whenever a child/youth does not respond to minor correction, or if a pattern of misbehaviour increases. 9. Whenever possible, staff/ volunteers should consider using one or more of the following options when dealing with misbehaviour: . Distract the child/youth with another activity. . Help the child/youth focus on another more acceptable behaviour. . Isolate the child/youth from others, if another staff/ volunteer is available to assist . For young children, time-outs should not last longer (in minutes) than the age of the child. For example, a three-year-old should not have to sit for a time- out any longer than three minutes. . When nothing seems to be working, staff/volunteer(s) should get help before “losing their cool.”

4. Specific Program Guidelines A. NURSERY PROGRAM 1. Minors, age 12 to 17, who have been approved by the nursery coordinator, may assist in the nursery, provided that an adult is present. Minors may not care for child/ren without adult supervision. 2. One adult attendant must be in the infant nursery with no more that four infants before an additional attendant is required. One adult attendant must be in the toddler nursery for every six children before an additional attendant is required. At least two attendants must serve in nursery whenever it is scheduled. 3. Attendants may take children from the nursery only for good reason, such as to use the bathroom or in case of illness. Any significant medical problem should be reported immediately to the child’s parent(s). For children who do not require assistance in the bathroom, the adult attendant must remain outside the bathroom. For children who require assistance the adult attendant must assist the child with the bathroom door ajar. The diapering of an infant or toddler must take place in the

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 8 nursery room under the observation of another attendant. To assist the attendants in these tasks, the electronic screen in the sanctuary may be used to request a specific parent or volunteer to attend the nursery. 4. A couple (husband and wife) or 2 adult family members may serve in the nursery at the same time provided that a 3rd non-related person is also present. 5. An adult or minor who is not scheduled as nursery attendant for that particular service may not spend time in the nursery room(s) during or after the service unless approved by the nursery supervisor. 6. The Discipline Policy applies to nursery programs.

B. CHILDREN’S CHURCH SCHOOL 1. All Church School teachers must be 18 or older, and a teacher plus an assistant, minimum age of 12, will be in charge of each class for the three, four and five year olds. Any assistant aged 12 to 17 must be approved by the Church School coordinator, and consideration will be given to gender and age in the appointment of each teaching team. 2. A couple (husband and wife) or 2 adult family members may serve at the same time provided that a 3rd non-related person is also present. 3. Teachers and helpers may assist children with bathroom needs. Bathroom assistance is conducted as in the nursery policy. Children will be encouraged to use bathroom facilities before and after class. 4. Children should not leave the classroom except for illness, bathroom assistance, or other compelling reason. 5. Whenever children’s church school is in session, the classroom door should allow for an unobstructed view of the room. 6. The Discipline Policy applies to children’s church school programs.

C. BIBLE SCHOOL, COFFEE BREAK STORY HOUR, AND OTHER MINISTRIES INVOLVING CHILDREN 1. All classes and activities will ordinarily be conducted with at least two volunteers/staff, at least one of whom is an adult. Volunteers/ staff should not meet alone with a child without another adult or leader nearby to observe. 2. Volunteers/staff ordinarily should not physically restrain a child in their care. Leaders should ask for assistance if a child behaves in a manner that seems to require restraint. If the leader determines that restraint is needed, the child’s parent will be notified immediately and the child may be removed from the class until the parent arrives. 3. Children should not leave their classrooms except for illness, to use the bathroom, or other compelling reasons. 4. Classrooms held in offsite facilities such as a person’s home, activity building, or school should adhere to the same safety considerations as classrooms in the church building. 5. Church volunteers or staff transporting a child in a church vehicle must have parental permission to do so. 6. In the event that church members use their homes/yards for neighborhood clubs, a child’s parent must give consent for the child to meet in the home/yard. Two volunteers (at least one adult) must conduct in-home programs. Children attending in-home programs must be able to use bathroom facilities without assistance. If transportation is needed to bring children, it should be provided according to number 5 above. 7. The Discipline Policy applies to the above programs.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 9 D. GEMS AND CADETS 1. GEMS and Cadet leaders should identify abusive behavior among minors in their program and have a policy of zero tolerance to these behaviors. 2. Leaders should provide adequate supervision of the youth. Each GEM and Cadet function should be supervised by at least two persons, an adult leader and another volunteer at least four years older than the oldest Cadet or GEM. 3. If a child needs significant medical attention, the parent(s) should be notified immediately. 4. Cadets or GEMS should not arrive more than ten minutes before the start of the class, nor should they stay longer than ten minutes after the class. No counselor shall detain a Cadet or GEM for a one-to-one meeting for more than ten minutes after the end of the program. 5. Cadets and GEM activities planned away from the church facility, out of town, or overnight should be conducted in general compliance with aforementioned policies. 6. While the appropriate display of affection between leaders and the youth is often part of conveying support and encouragement to one another, such displays can be misinterpreted. For that reason, displays of affection should be limited to such actions as a brief hug, an arm around the shoulder, an open-hand pat on the back, a handclasp, or a light touch to the forearm. Each leader, Cadet and GEM has the right to refuse any of these displays and will be respected. 7. The Discipline Policy applies to GEM and Cadet programs.

E. YOUTH GROUPS 1. Each year youth group leaders should hold a session about abuse for members of the youth group. Topics for this class might include date violence, biblical guidelines for dating relationships, awareness of signs of abuse, a teenager’s response to a teenage victim or abuser, or prevention of abuse. 2. Youth group leaders may meet privately with a youth group member only with the permission of a parent. Any such meeting should occur in public. 3. It is never appropriate for a youth group leader and a youth group member to date each other when one is an adult and the other is a minor under age 16. Dating between leaders and group members is not encouraged as a general practice. 4. In the context of group activities, youth group leaders should provide supervision of the youth in their care. Youth group functions ordinarily should not be under the supervision of only one youth group leader. These guidelines also apply to activities away from the church site. 5. While the appropriate display of affection is often part of conveying support and encouragement to one another, such displays can be misinterpreted. For that reason, displays of affection should be limited to such actions as a brief hug, an arm around the shoulder, an open-hand pat on the back, a handclasp, or a light touch to the forearm. A youth group leader’s or member’s right to refuse such a display of affection will be respected. 6. A youth group leader should not use their position of trust or authority to develop an inappropriate relationship with a youth group member. 7. The Discipline Policy applies to Youth Programs.

F. OFFICE BEARERS 1. In performing the duties of their ministry, office-bearers will meet situations requiring discretion in making visiting arrangements.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 10 2. When visiting with individual members office bearers are encouraged to arrange these visits in the presence of a second office-bearer, another adult or in a public place. 3. It is recommended when someone makes a request for a one-to-one contact, office- bearers ensure that another office-bearer is aware of the planned visit and the reason for the request if known. 4. An office-bearer is not to use his position of trust and authority to develop an inappropriate relationship. 5. An office-bearer must maintain confidentiality at all times. As the charge to the Elders reads, “Hold in trust all sensitive matters confided to you”. This counts for all staff/volunteers/office-bearers keeping in mind the legislation regarding reporting requirements.

5. Procedure for Handling Abuse Reports 1. Introduction Trinity Christian Reformed Church assumes responsibility for responding to abuse that occurs in Council approved programs only. Trinity Christian Reformed Church is responsible for providing sufficient training and support to staff and volunteers for reporting abuse in any circumstance.

When signs, symptoms or reports of abuse arise from a minor served in a church program, they need to be taken seriously. When required, an investigation of symptoms and reports must only be conducted by local police and people from the Ministry for Children & Families (MCF) who have been trained to investigate child abuse complaints.

As per Section 14.1 of the Child, Family and Community Services Act of British Columbia, an individual is legally required to report child abuse. Volunteers and staff should follow the established reporting procedure.

2. Responding to Signs, Symptoms and Reports of Abuse Volunteers/staff who work in child/youth programs may become aware of suspected child abuse by witnessing an abusive incident or having an alleged incident reported by the victim or by another child. Some children will not report an abusive incident because of their fear of the abuser or because they believe they deserved the abuse. Other children are threatened by the abuser not to tell anyone of their experience, but volunteers/staff may observe signs and symptoms that may lead them to suspect abuse.

The reporting procedures outlined below will assist volunteers/staff to respond to reported incidents of abuse or to respond to observable signs and symptoms of abuse.

3. Reporting Procedures 1. Each person who has reason to believe that a child (under age 19) is or may be in need of protection shall forthwith report the belief and the information upon which it is based to the local Ministry for Children & Families (MCF) in compliance with the Child, Family and Community Services Act. (Note: Social Services Emergency telephone number is 310-1234). It may be wise for the person to consult with the Safe Church Committee before reporting but without being coerced as to whether or not to report.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 11 2. Prior to reporting the occurrence, and pursuant to the Child, Family and Community Services Act, no staff or volunteers, shall apart from complying with paragraph 1, conduct any investigation unless authorized by the appropriate civil authorities. Any information obtained and any report pursuant to paragraph 1 herein shall be considered and treated as CONFIDENTIAL information by the church.

4. Suspected Abuse by Staff/Volunteer of a Minor, Youth, Adult, or Senior Person a) Volunteers: If there is written or verbal report made, alleging that any volunteer personnel has abused or threatened to abuse a minor or if the Council received information about any volunteer personnel that might indicate that a minor may be at risk, such volunteer personnel shall immediately be suspended from any duties or responsibilities in the ministry area pending the outcome of the investigation and subject to any discipline policy. b) Staff: If there is an allegation that a staff has abused or threatened to abuse a minor, such employee shall be suspended from any duties or responsibilities in all ministries, with pay, pending the outcome of such investigation, until otherwise notified by the Council of the church and subject to any written employment discipline policy process. c) Any notice of suspension shall be given in such a way that no investigation by the MCF or police will be put in jeopardy and shall be done in consultation with the civil authorities. The suspension from duties and responsibilities is not and shall not be seen or accepted as the “guilt” of the individual, but only as an indication of the priority given to the need to protect our children. d) Any volunteer or staff, who has been suspended pending the completion of the investigation, shall be subject to the guidance of the church in accordance with the Safe Church Policy. e) Any personnel, volunteer or employee, found to have abused a person or placed a person at risk of abuse shall, apart from any other discipline process, be prohibited from participation in any ministry of the church.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 12 Appendix 1:

Signs and Symptoms of Child Abuse Children rarely exhibit just one sign that they are the victims of abuse. Some symptoms may also represent typical developmental changes or the after-effect of traumas in their lives other than abuse. Conversely, it is possible for abuse to be taking place without the appearance of noticeable symptoms because of the child’s ability to mask or deny what would otherwise be very confusing and painful to acknowledge. Generally, several signs observed over a period of time suggest that a child may be suffering from abuse. This highlights the need for training among volunteers, staff, and program leaders.

A. Infants and Preschool Children a) Regression to an earlier stage of behavioural development such as baby talk, thumb sucking, or bed-wetting. b) Change in social behaviour (excessive crying or changing, or becoming aggressive or withdrawn) that is not associated with normal developmental stages. c) Physical manifestations such as loss of bowel control, bed wetting, frequent urination, headaches, stomach aches, breathing difficulties, sore throats accompanied by gagging, stains in the child’s underclothes. d) Exhibiting signs of fear around a family member or a familiar person, or fear of a familiar place or object. e) Fear of being touched, shying away from physical contact. Resistance to being diapered or assisted in the bathroom. f) Use of explicit language or sexual behaviour that is beyond the child’s comprehension or life experience. g) Attempting sexual behaviour with other children or attending adults. h) Unexplained injuries and/or bruises, repeated injuries blamed on the child’s carelessness, multiple bruises sustained in one event, or bruises to child’s midsection, back, head, or back of thighs, signs of scalding, burning, or distinctive bruising, such as in the shape of a belt buckle; multiple bruises in various stages of healing. i) Name-calling toward other children, bullying behaviour, sulking/brooding. j) Fascination with fires, playing with matches, lighter.

B. School-age children a) Physical manifestations as above with addition of complaints of pain, irritation, soreness, redness on the child’s bottom, smearing feces on walls or objects. b) Pattern of injuries, multiple injuries, injuries about the face or neck; failure to complain about or explain an obvious physical discomfort. c) Unusual fears of a familiar person, a particular room, a particular object, or fear of new experiences. d) Poor concentration in classroom. e) Exhibiting adult-pleasing behaviours, striving for perfection, acting miserable if failing. f) Engaging in self-injury; engaging in excessive masturbation or masturbation in public setting. g) Acting enraged and out of control, expressing anger through destruction. h) Shyness about physical touch. i) Exhibiting sexual behaviour beyond comprehension or maturity level; behaving in sexual manner with other children or adults. j) Exhibiting signs of needing to be in control of others or situations, bullying others. k) Hostility and distrust of adults, mood swings and irritability, violent disruptions. l) Acting out, including hoarding food and toys, lying, stealing, assaulting.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 13 m) Frequent absences from school or other scheduled events either because of being punished or to hide bruises. n) Low self-esteem, particular sensitivity to criticism. o) Hyper-vigilance (excessive and suspicious watching of other people) is easily startled. p) Preoccupation with fire and setting fires.

C. Adolescents a) Eating disorders, use of laxatives, unexplained and dramatic changes in weight. b) Change in sleep patterns, including excessive sleeping, sleeping during the day, and insomnia. c) Performance in school drops dramatically. d) Perfectionist behaviour, excessive self-criticism, attempting to please adults, overreacting to any form of criticism or complaint. e) Experimentation with drugs and alcohol. f) Self-abusive behaviour including cutting self, preoccupation with danger and weapons, suicide attempts. g) Truancy from school. h) Cruelty to animals, bullying younger children. i) Emotional numbness, inability to be emotionally supportive to others. j) Having few friends, changing friends often. k) Depression and other signs of withdrawal and avoidance. l) Pregnancy. m) Refusing to attend to basic hygiene. n) Rectal and vaginal infections. o) Hyper-vigilance (excessive and suspicious watching of other people), is easily startled.

D. Neglect a) Appearing to be underfed, constantly hungry, underweight for size and age. b) Begging for food, stealing food, hoarding food. c) Lack of supervision, underage child supervising another child/children. d) Chronic absenteeism from school, unattended educational needs. e) Unattended medical, dental needs. f) Consistent or frequent lack of hygiene, poor hygiene, or lack of cleanliness resulting in odors. g) For infants, failure to thrive.

E. Parental Behaviours and Home Life a) Not attending meetings about the child, not showing an interest in the child, critical of child, uncomplimentary. b) Constantly putting child down, using harsh words to describe child, using threats and unflattering language. c) Describing child as underachiever, complaining that he/she lets people down, is unmotivated, achieves less than brothers and sisters. d) Speaking of child in ways that sounds romantic, too grown-up, too sugary, and too perfect. e) Hostile, closed-minded, overprotective, isolating, doesn’t let others in the house, won’t participate in activities with other parents, makes excuses about failing to do tasks, talks about things not being good at home. f) Reports of past/other suspicious behaviour, reports that an older brother or sister may have been mistreated. g) Chemical dependency by one or both parents.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 14 h) Sudden and dramatic changes in family’s financial security.

Appendix 2:

Responding to a Child’s Report of Abuse a) Take the child seriously when he/she tells the story. b) Avoid judgment statements such as, “I think you just had a bad dream.” c) Do not appear frightened or disgusted by the child’s story, since this may cause the child to stop talking or to believe you are upset with the child. d) Do not try to convince the child that the story isn’t true or that it did not happen the way the child reports it did. e) Do not make promises to the child that you will not tell anyone what has been shared with you. f) Remind the child that whatever happened was not his/her fault. g) Remind the child that it was a good decision to tell someone what happened to him/her. h) Tell the child that you want to find help so the incident can be prevented from happening again. i) Do not offer a child a reward for telling the story or promise a gift if the child tells another adult. j) Reassure the child he/she does not deserve to be hurt by anyone. k) Do not frighten the child by talking about police involvement or medical examinations to verify the complaint; instead, share with the child that other people need to know about what happened, and they will talk to the child later. l) Do not ask the child to show you any bruises that are beneath the child’s underwear or clothing: only observe those bruises that are accessible. In some communities, removing a child’s clothing even to confirm a report of abuse is a violation of the law. m) Do not investigate the child’s story: rather, listen to the story and take notes immediately afterwards while it is still fresh in your memory. n) Do not tell the child he/she has been abused. o) Offer to support the child and remind the child that you care about him/her. p) Follow through in consecutive weeks and months by speaking to the child and offering support.

Appendix 3:

Reporting Abuse (child under 19) If the victim is a child under the age of nineteen, notify the Ministry for Children & Families: a) if the child has been, or is likely to be, physically harmed by the child’s parent; b) if the child has been, or is likely to be, sexually abused or exploited by the child’s parent; c) if the child has been, or is likely to be, physically harmed, sexually abused or sexually exploited by another person and if the child’s parent is unwilling or unable to protect the child; d) if the child has been, or is likely to be, physically harmed because of neglect by the child’s parent; e) if the child is emotionally harmed by the parent’s conduct; f) if the child is deprived of necessary health care; g) if the child’s development is likely to be seriously impaired by a treatable condition and the child’s parent refuses to provide or consent to treatment; h) if the child’s parent is unable or unwilling to care for the child and has not made adequate provision for the child’s care; i) if the child is or has been absent from home in circumstances that endanger the child’s care;

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 15 j) if the child’s parent is dead and adequate provision has not been made for the child’s care; k) if the child has been abandoned and adequate provision has not been made for the child’s care; l) if the child is in the care of a director or another person by agreement and the child’s parent is unwilling or unable to resume care when the agreement is no longer in force.

For the purpose of this section, a child is emotionally harmed if the child demonstrates severe anxiety, depression, withdrawal, or self-destructive or aggressive behaviour.

Appendix 4:

Responding to Parent(s) who are notified of an Abuse Report a) Remain calm and non-judgmental. b) Anyone who makes a report to the police or child protection authorities is usually granted anonymity; do not identify the reporter unless you are given permission to do so. c) Do not share any statements made by the child with a parent or relative who is implicated by the child as an abuser. It is advisable not to share the child’s statements with anyone other than the authorities until the identity of the abuser can be determined and authorities have determined whether or not the child can be protected from contact with that person. d) Do not attempt to convince a parent that the alleged abuse happened or did not happen; do not attempt to discredit the child nor cast suspicion on the alleged abuser. e) Do not investigate with a parent what may be happening in the home; and do not share information with a parent that has not been shared with the authorities. f) Do not make promises to a parent about the outcome of the investigation. g) Listen to any information a parent may offer about the incident and record it immediately after the conversation; report additional information to authorities through the reporting procedure outlined in the church’s policy. h) Offer support to the parent(s). i) Suggest resources for parent(s) including books or literature that may be helpful to them. j) Allow parent(s) to express their disbelief, anger, and grief. Parent(s) may be in shock or denial at the mention of abuse allegations. k) Do not minimize the type of abuse, its impact on the child, or its harm to the child. l) Assure parent(s) of the confidential nature of the report and the need to maintain confidentiality unless disclosure is necessary to protect the well-being of other children.

Appendix 5:

Responding to Adult Abuse Complaints 1. Persons seeking advice on matters of abuse may contact the Safe Church Committee. a. In the event the Safe Church Committee is approached by both parties to a dispute seeking resolution, the SCC shall listen to both sides. i.) whenever a complaint of abuse is heard, at least three members of the SCC shall be present; or ii.) whenever a member of the church is accused of abuse, at least three members of the SCC should be present to hear the presentation of the person being accused b. The Safe Church Committee may seek reconciliation between the parties, wherever possible. Prior to proceeding, the SCC must make an assessment whether the process of reconciliation could bring healing, or other options need to be pursued. c. If no immediate reconciliation is possible, the SCC will advise the parties involved to seek professional counselling, legal advice, etc.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 16 d. The involvement of the Classical Safe Church Team (CSCT) is to be considered in any abuse concerns, and the SCC will use the resources of the CSCT and take appropriate steps as outlined in the policies of the CSCT. 2. A short report detailing the substance of the meetings held, the advice provided and the actions taken should be prepared and filed in the secure files of the SCC.

Appendix 6:

Liability Insurance Council shall review its insurance policies on an annual basis and if necessary upgrade the scope of coverage.

Note: Remember, individual Council members could face personal liability in the event of a claim and therefore Council members should be personally interested in ensuring that the church has the best liability policy available.

Full Council 2008-07-17 Minutes 17