Pastoral Theology

PASTORAL THEOLOGY EXAM # 4 STUDY GUIDE Lectures 29 – 37

Lecture 29 If a pastor doesn’t have a good amount of love (charity), then he is nothing! He’s not really a pastor. The number one job qualification of a pastor is that he loves the sheep! If you do all your pastoring and don’t really love the sheep, then it profiteths you nothing!

There were a few who the Bible states that Jesus specifically had love for: Peter, James, and John; Martha, Mary, and Lazarus. Maybe these had a closer relationship with Jesus Christ than the others.

Sometimes love has to be ‘tough love’; love doesn’t mean always doing what makes the other person happy.

Show love all the time: even in business meetings; even when reading the announcements; even when someone is being a problem in the service; even when someone is disrespectful to you; even when one tries to go against you. No matter what happens, show love.

The weak, immature member or visitor may very well ‘crash and burn’ if the pastor doesn’t show them a lot of attention and treat them as something very, very special; they have a ‘high need for love being shown them’.

Pastors are stereotyped as being finger pointing, jowl shaking, yellers behind their bully pulpit; why not break the mold, preacher? Be a loving, caring, smiling, pleasant speaking, hand waving hi, hugging, hand shaking, encouraging, helping pastor?!...

If you don’t love them a whole bunch they may just go somewhere where they will be loved; you may find yourself with a church of only a few members.

If you love them and you know it then your face will surely show it….

If you enter an ‘unfriendly’ church, then figure the pastor is an unfriendly leader of unfriendly folk.

A professional will not typically love the people they serve; they may like them (or their money), but loving them is probably not too likely. So, don’t become a professional minister.

The pastor often loves the program, the building, the numbers, the finances, the fame, the power, more than he loves the people!

Lecture 30 Pastors are to be ‘specialists’ in dealing with tragedies. Find a way to use every test and every trial as a bridge to minister to the hurting…take advantage of the tragedy. You don’t need to try and explain why the tragedy happened; you just need to be there and simply show you care. It is vitally imperative that when tragedy occurs, you drop everything, and I mean everything, and go represent Jesus Christ to those suffering loss or experiencing hurt.

A crisis is not necessarily harmful, and, in fact, may become the vehicle of significant personal growth. Try and get the most out of the crisis for growth; find a way of putting the person’s pain to good use for them. Most experts feel that a crisis period usually lasts from 4 to 6 weeks. During this time period, the person is maximally open to change.

Provide a climate that allows the individual to vent his feelings (grief, fear, rage, etc.). However, try to have the individual eventually to become calm;

Grief in death cuts with a sharp edge of a razor; Grief in life cuts with the jaggedness of a saw. A tragic death hurts quickly and deeply; a tragic life experience (romantic failures, wayward children, etc.) keep on slowly cutting away causing a lot of tearing and eventually can get quite deep over time. Here are the 5 basic stages of grief (Kubler-Ross’) that most will go through in a tragic situation…. 1. Denial – ‘This can’t be happening to me’ 2. Anger - ‘This isn’t fair!’ 3. Bargaining - ‘I’ll do anything if you will fix this situation, Lord!’ 4. Depression - ‘This hurts bad…I feel like giving up…’ 5. Acceptance - ‘I may as well accept this and get on with my life…’

In the first stages, presence is more important than talking. In the later stages it is very important to encourage the grieving person to talk about what has happened and how they are feeling about it.

Psalms are a great resource for Bible passages that can help a grieving individual. 61 of the 150 Psalms are categorized as psalms of lament.

There can be something known as ‘good grief’ -- Rom 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. (don’t need to memorize)

Our own tragedy and grief can enable us to one day help those who are going thru a similar trial.

Isa 53:3-5 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: (Jesus was well acquainted with grief)

Bible passages to share at a funeral: 1 Thes 4 (…comfort one another with these words); Jn 14 (…that wher I am, there ye may be also); 1 Cor 15 (…we shall all be changed….in the twinkling of an eye…)

Lecture 31 One of the hardest things for a Pastor to do is to consistantly love the unloveable.

People will not care what you know until they know that you care. Anon.

Jesus Christ was so unloved; He gave so much love out to the most unlovable people on the face of the Earth; He set the example for loving the unlovable. He is to have that attitude of ‘Father forgive them, for they know not what they do….” The greatest act of love is to love someone that is horribly unlovely.

The Pastor typically ends up knowing the good, the bad, and the ugly, about most everyone in the church. Often, a Pastor will find himself unconsciously distancing himself from certain in the church; he finds out a few things that aren’t so great about them and then as the months go by he doesn’t seem to go out of his way to be friendly to them; it is a ‘psychological distancing’.

Be a good listener; it is one of the hardest things for a Pastor to do…i.e. not talk ! Listen to all they have to say; you may not agree with most of it, or find most of it pathetic, but at the end say “I love you dear brother;

Another way to show love to the unlovables is to ‘touch them’

Onesimus was one that Paul loved and it totally changed his future. Love the unloveables. Judas betrayed Jesus with a kiss. Jesus still loved him…

Lecture 32 Beware of Psychologists (Dr. Phil); it’s all based in humanism (Dr. Dobson was trained that way…)

God’s ways are not our ways.

Pastors of larger churches can get burned out with lots of counselling (Pastor Hyles would counsel 20 or more people a day). It is ok to get help…

The Pastor’s primary ministry is the preaching and teaching of the Word of God (II Timothy 4:2). But in the midst of all of this is the very important ministry of counseling. The pastor is often the first, and sometimes the only, professional person to whom people go for comfort and counsel. Surveys prove that 42% of the people with problems would prefer to seek out a pastor.

Don't act surprised or shocked. If the counselee says he is worthless, don't act surprised, or if he tells some sordid, immoral story or of some involvement, don't be shocked or show dismay, etc.

Counseling is emotionally stressful. You would not be a real person, with real feelings, if you did not hurt for others as you listen to their problems. It’s ok to cry with them, to show emotion.

It’s important to be a good listener (something Pastor’s aren’t typically too good at…they are good talkers though).

A difficult portion of counselling is ‘convincing the counselee that what the Bible states will indeed work in their specific situation’.

Rules to follow in counseling: 1. Begin session with prayer: gets it spiritual right away; need God’s help 7. Assess what is the real problem at hand; much of what they may be saying is all secondary; there may be a root cause for it all (depression is a symptom, but there is a deep rooted cause for it) symptom, but there is a deep rooted cause for it) 8. Start the actual counselling with Bible passages: sets the precedent; focuses on right things 9. Get the counselee involved with finding the answer by asking them what they think the Bible is saying 12. Take time to verify that the counselee understands what the counsel is: explain it again and again; ask them questions about it; have them explain how they are going to use it in their situation. 15. They need to be faithful at personal devotions and church attendance; if not, then you may want to cancel further counselling; 16. Give them assignments: 19. Always close on a positive note, and with prayer.

Prov 27:6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend;….

When counseling a woman, here are some rules to follow: Rules to avoid the Tenderness Trap: 1. Don’t trust yourself (you are the biggest problem) 2. Make strict rules, and keep them (no, never alone….) 3. Include the counselee’s male authority (father, husband, brother) 4. Get a woman involved with counseling women 5. Accountability (your wife, Deacon, another mature Christian) 6. End the counseling if there is even the slightest concern for inappropriateness

Shouldn’t a Pastor be equipped enough by God and the Bible to handle any situation that may come up in the arena of counselling? Yes, but, not every Pastor is perfect, and neither is every counselee… When to refer: 1. When the Pastor doesn’t have the skills necessary to counsel the particular situation: Molestation; Homosexuality; Spousal abuse; Suicidality; Drug abuse; Pornography addiction; Obsessive Compulsive; elderly neglect; child abuse; illegal activity 2. When the Pastor senses that there might be some inappropriateness developing between they and the counselee. 3. When the situation is serious, and it doesn’t appear that any progress is being made, despite at least 3 serious counselling sessions.

The Christian Law Association (CLA) recommends: 1. Never charge for the services provided (even if they offer you money; even if they are not a member) 2. Make sure to disclose at the beginning that you are not a ‘licensed counselor’ (unless you are one) 3. Make sure to disclose that the Bible will be the source of any advice that you give, not yourself (in general) 4. Make sure that the church’s insurance covers liability for ‘religious counselling’

Lecture 33 No entries Lecture 34 Solomon recognized that the greatest think he could ever ask for was ‘wisdom’; Every Pastor should sincerely pray what Solomon prayed:: “Give therefore thy servant an understanding heart to judge thy people, that I may discern between good and bad"

A Pastor needs to eat lots of strong meat from the Word of God. He also needs to use it on a regular basis (excercised). The goal is to be able to better discern between good and evil (error).

The goal in the decision making ultimately rests on understanding what the will of the Lord is. The Pastor is a spiritual man and is more than capable of judging all things. Through the Holy Spirit and the word of God we actually possess the mind of Christ. A true God-called Pastor needs to rest confident that His Lord will give him the correct judgment for the decision that he is facing.

You must not trust your own understanding; don’t figure that you are ‘probably right’ with your way of thinking about such and such.

Don’t follow the larger, more ‘successful’ church’s philosophies on decision making: i.e. how will it increase our numbers? we all need to be one. sin is all relative. need to have an elder board presiding. go ask the deacon board. go ask the board of directors….

Lecture 35 and 36 No entries

Lecture 37 ▫ The Pastor is a gift to the church for ‘the work of the ministry’. ▫ This ‘work of the ministry’ is for a goal; the goal of getting the church folk to come in the unity of the faith…to the knowledge of the Son of God…to a perfect level…to the level that Jesus Christ has set.

1 Tim 3:1 This is a true saying, If a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work. ▫ The work of the ministry is indeed a ‘good’ work! What better ‘work’ is there to do?! It is work that is all about good; about God; about doing good.

This work of the ministry is a ‘daily’ work; it’s your daily job. Others put in 40+ hours a week into their job…5 or 6 days a week; the man of God should do no less! Does he really need a ‘day off’ from ‘work’?!

▫ There are certain jobs that are not that appropriate for a pastor to be involved with, especially when it affects his ability to minister to the people: jobs like cleaning, driving, building, arranging, organizing, printing, counting, mailing, etc.. ▫ The main job of a pastor is the ministry; the spiritual aspects to the church; not the mammon side.

Moses’ father-in-law, Jethro, gave Moses wise advice; Jethro told Moses not to take too much responsibility on himself, but to get men to help you.

The main work of the ministry that a pastor should be devoting the majority of his time to is not: the Treasury, the building project, the whiners, the radio ministry, the fellowship, the fellowshipping, etc.. No, not any of these; but rather two things: Prayer and The Ministry of the Word.

A pastor should spend more time in prayer than in watching tv, than in eating, than in bathing, than in relaxing, than in his favorite hobby, than in reading the newspaper…than, potentially, all these put together!!!

A pastor needs to be known for his prayer life. A pastor should have wrinkles around his eyes and sore knees.

Part of his uniform is a suit, a tie, and a big black book called ‘the Word of God’!

▫ Paul exhorted Timothy, the young pastor, to give attendance to 3 things: Reading, Exhortation, and Doctrine.

▫ Involved in this ‘work of the ministry’ is the ministry of evangelism.

▫ Put the work in in training men for the ministry. Don’t pawn it off on some surrogate mother! The Pastor is to be the trainer, not some eloquent high paid College Professor at Semitary! ▫ Just how much work did Jesus Christ put in into teaching and training those 12 disciples?! It was a daily work. ▫ College, institute, training, or whatever you call it, needs to be potentially a daily activity…a daily work!

▫ The only ones that God puts into this ‘work of the ministry’ are those that have already been found to be faithful.

2 Cor 11:28 Beside those things that are without, that which cometh upon me daily, the care of all the churches. ▫ Who was busier than Paul?