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Blended Learning Resources

Facilitated Activity

Dealing with Difficult Colleagues – Assessment Activity

It is only natural that we find some people difficult to work with. We need to examine and assess how we deal with such people in order to learn and improve our own behaviors. Self-knowledge is the first step in working more harmoniously with others.

This activity helps you assess how well you deal with difficult behaviors in colleagues. You can also use it to help someone you work with/coach deal with a difficult colleague.

Dealing with Difficult Behavior

A typical workplace is home to all different kinds of people. As a manager, you probably deal with varied personalities and a wide spectrum of behaviors every day. Sometimes, a person's behavior affects the performance and productivity of others. When this happens, it's important that you confront the person quickly and firmly.

You can handle difficult behavior by

 Listening:

Using active listening techniques, taking a neutral stance, repeating the person’s complaints to indicate that you are taking them seriously, using short phrases, paraphrasing, and ensuring the person feels understood.

 Demonstrating patience:

Refusing to provoke the other person, trying to understand them, sticking to the real issue, and not being drawn into conflict.

 Redirecting conflict:

Bringing conflict to an amicable close by telling the other person it’s time to move on, agreeing to disagree, and not becoming defensive.

Dealing with Difficult Behavior Self-assessment – Part 1

Think about someone you find difficult to work with in your team or office. What behaviors does this person demonstrate that "get under your skin"? Use the table below to describe the difficult behavior.

Behavior

General description of behavior Example(s)

Now think about some of the unsuccessful strategies you have tried using in the past to deal with this person. What were the results of those strategies, and why do you think they didn’t work?

Actions

What I’ve tried Results

Now that you’ve identified what did not work, and why, plan how you will use more effective methods to work with this person/behavior in the future.

Solutions

When/if this happens . . . I will . . .

Dealing with Difficult Behavior Self-assessment – Part 2

Now think about how you deal with difficult behavior in general. Are you generally

A. Anxious, uncomfortable, and ineffective? B. Relaxed, comfortable, and effective?

If you chose option A, use the following section to list some ideas that might help you become more relaxed, comfortable, and effective.

If you chose option B, use the following section to list some of the reasons that you feel relaxed, comfortable, and effective when dealing with difficult colleagues. How can you maintain this attitude, and how can you others take the same attitude in their own dealings with others?

Comments:

Now assess how you would you rate yourself in dealing with difficult colleagues in each of these three ways: showing you are listening, demonstrating patience, and redirecting the conflict? Rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 5, depending on how often you use each strategy.

Strategies for Dealing with Difficult Colleagues

1 = almost never; 5 = almost always

Table Head style 1 2 3 4 5 I show I am listening (e.g., taking a neutral stance, repeating the person’s complaints to show I am taking them seriously, using short phrases) I demonstrate patience (e.g., refusing to provoke the other person, trying to understand, sticking to the real issue, and not being drawn into conflict) I redirect the conflict (e.g., bringing conflict to an amicable close by telling the other person it’s time to move on)

Finally, list the improvements that you need to take in order to use these strategies more effectively.

Improvements Required: