Column: Protection from Predators

Column: Protection from predators By Juliana Menke, special to the Tampa Bay Times. Tuesday, April 21, 2015 2:01pm

LARA CERRI | Times

A resident of the Cedar Hollow Apartments in Pinellas Park holds a sheriff’s office flier warning that Michael Shepard, released from prison with a sexual predator designation, had moved back to the apartments.

After almost 15 years in prison, Michael Shepard was released with a sexual predator designation. The apartment complex he moved to last December vigilantly disclosed his predator history to its tenants. Yet today, less than four months after moving in, he stands accused in the sexual assaults of seven children in Pinellas Park. Shepard had six known victims before he went to prison. Since his release, police say he has added seven new victims. What is unknown is how many other, unreported victims Shepard may have left in his wake. While a jury may ultimately decide his guilt or innocence, Pinellas County parents are wondering how to keep their children safe. Unfortunately, few child molesters come with a warning label, as Shepard did. Most live quietly in our communities, looking, working, talking and acting like average citizens. Even when they arrive with a notification flier, molesters are experts at manipulating both adults and children into trusting relationships. In 93 percent of reported child sexual abuse cases, the parent/guardian already knew and trusted the molester before the child did. To gain access to a child, any story will do. Shepard told his neighbors his conviction was based on a misunderstanding and convinced parents that he deserved a second chance. Released sexual predators will commonly cite prison time, newfound religion, counseling, a new love relationship, sobriety and education as the source of their transformation from predator into upstanding and safe citizen, ready to re-enter society. Decent, caring people believe in serving one's time and having second chances. Jeanine Cohen was Shepard's lawyer for the Jimmy Ryce Act hearing to determine if he should have been involuntarily committed to indefinite incarceration as a sexual predator. She said that the costs are too great to house such criminals permanently. But what about the cost to the victims? Child sexual abuse can lead to adulthood depression, anxiety, eating disorders, substance abuse and early death. Who will be paying those costs? The survivors and every taxpayer in this country. As a licensed mental health counselor with years of work in the field of child sexual abuse prevention, I know there's only one acceptable statement from a sexual predator: "I am a molester, and to keep children safe, I cannot ever be alone with a child or group of children." If a sexual predator said that to me, I would acknowledge the possibility that they are truly a changed person. Otherwise, no way. Registered sexual predators only need to check in with their registry supervisor two to four times per year. Sixty percent of second offenses occur while the predator is living in a supervised community. Our current system doesn't even keep registered predators from reoffending. Sadly, the majority of child molestations worldwide are never reported. The bulk of molesters never get arrested or serve prison time. While arresting, convicting and labeling sexual predators has the potential to increase safety, the truth is most molesters fly well under the radar. How do we protect the rights of children to be free from molestation? There are ways to increase child sexual safety. Knowing the red-flag behaviors of child molesters, learning to calmly set safety boundaries and establishing a life-long conversation about healthy sexuality with your child can add layers of protection. Creating alone time with children is the goal of a child molester. Reduce one-on-one alone time between children and adults, and reported molestation drops 80 percent. Creating secrecy between molester and child is essential. Teach children no one is allowed to make a secret with them. Never trust a person with your child based solely on position or power (for example, a doctor, priest, coach). Be careful when people blur their roles (for example, a Scout leader who gives rides, offers meals and other non-Scouting activities). Other red-flag behaviors of child molesters include ignoring physical boundaries, using sexual language to describe children and singling children out with gifts of time, money, games, trips, clothing and other tempting devices (this is called grooming). Speak calmly and openly with your children about healthy sexuality. Get age-appropriate sexual education books and read them, first on your own, and then with them. Become comfortable having matter-of-fact discussions with your children as they grow regarding sexuality and sexual safety. For more information, attend a free SAFE (Sexual Awareness Family Education) training locally. Find a time and location by calling Suncoast Center Inc. at (727) 388-1220. Juliana Menke is a licensed mental health counselor with the Parent Aide Program, a national program supported by the National Exchange Club Foundation. She wrote this exclusively for the Tampa Bay Times.