out words the voice of Montana’s LGBTIQ community December 2008

A Tale to Tell, a bi-elder speaks

Are gays the new bogeymen?

equality rallies Across Montana

The Conversation Issue: Let’s talk about community, equality, sex, gender and race Serving the LGBTIQ Community Inside This Edition of Out Words The Since 1998 Western Montana COVER STORIES: CommunityCenter Montana communities rally for rights and equality 127 North Higgins, Suite 202 Billings, Bozeman and Missoula join in national discussion...... 8-9 Missoula, MT 59802 Phone: 406-543-2224 E-mail: [email protected] Tales to tell: A conversation with Ollie Website: www.gaymontana.org The important business of living an authentic life ...... 10

Editors: Ken Spencer, content Are gays the new bogeymen? Suzie Reahard, design Too scary for words? ...... 7 Contributors: Casey Donahue, Kim Murphy, Julia Anghelescu, Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, Jesse McKinley, Hobie Hare, Rev. Lois E. Van Leer, Ralph Hexter, Sara First transgender mayor revealed...... 5 A&E Briefs...... 4 Hayden, Ken Spencer Quandry for hospitals ...... 6 Opinion: Long road for equal rights ...... 13 Cover Art: Stanley Upstanding Jon Freeland Advertising: Focus on the Family loses focus on finances. . .11 Calendar of Events...... 15 Monthly Circulation: 3,000 copies Annual subscriptions cost $10. Mail a check to Out Words World AIDS Day preview across state ...... 15 Community Resources...... 14 via the Center address. Submit letters to the editor at [email protected] A spiritual conversation on race ...... 12 Center Board Members Jon Freeland [email protected] e can see you Jamee Greer [email protected] Oh come on...admit it. W two types, you’ve seen ‘em! all. Bernie Kneefe [email protected] Everyone, I mean, everyone has done it, at least a million times. But the luxury of peeing outside, with the wind on your back, Mija [email protected] For crying out loud, we live in Montana. Land of the lonely two- the sun on your face, is one that royalty in the age of long-range Josh Peters-McBride [email protected] lane highway. Acres of lonely, lovely scenery. A place where a lenses must forgo. Dan Dewitt [email protected] person can find solitude, repose, silence. Sometimes, there’s just no place to hide. Molly Moody [email protected] If only kings and queens, princes and princesses had it so good. I am reminded of this in the wake of the recent elections. History Angel Nordquist [email protected] Picture it, you’re driving that stretch of highway between White was made on several fronts. A black man elected as president, the Sulphur Springs and Monarch. Nature calls. You answer. Right there, nation’s first transgender mayor in Oregon - voters made history by the side of the road. Or, better yet, you’re hiking the Rattlesnake on many levels. One copy of Out Words is available free of charge for each reader at current or the Big Snowy Mountains. You gotta whiz, you find a bush. I have But our country was reminded that rights can be taken away. Prop distribution locations. Copies of Out Words which have not been picked up for to admit, as Montanans, most of us take this luxury for granted. I’m 8, a measure that bans same-sex marriage in California, passed. the purpose of reading them are the property of the Center. Any unauthorized always reminded of this when I find myself in metropolitan areas, This spurred spontaneous rallies and demonstrations around the person who takes or moves multiple copies of Out Words to prevent other people where a place to do one’s business is sometimes difficult to find. country, even here under the Big Sky. from seeing or reading them shall be considered guilty of theft. Violators will It’s the little things in life that bring the greatest pleasure, I’m be prosecuted. The election has stirred America’s pot, bringing to the surface gently reminded at times. And then, a major event rocks the world ugly beliefs and feelings. and I realize how lucky I am. Be it war, famine, historical election, Multiple copies can be sent to any distribution location. Please call or email us The rate of race-based crimes has risen. Murmurs of racism and natural disaster or economic meltdown. Crisis can bring out the for information. homophobia have surfaced. best or worst in humans. The exposure continues. The Western Montana Gay & Lesbian Community Center is a 501(c)3 organization And then the royal penis appeared. and cannot endorse any candidate for public office. Articles or advertising is The scandal - the paparazzi photos of Prince William’s Willy, Churches, organizations and people who contributed to the strictly the opinion of the writers or advertisers, not that of the Board of splashed on websites, viewed by millions - exploded this week. demise of equal rights are being disclosed. The Mormons, the Directors, members of the editorial staff of the Out Words, nor the Western The crown jewels were exposed after the fair Prince had to pee Knights of Columbus, Focus on the Family and individuals are Montana Gay & Lesbian Community Center. Those who contribute, advertise and during a polo game. Apparently, the throne was too far, the Prince being revealed as major contributors to the pro-8 movement. distribute Out Words do not necessarily identify as LGBTIQ. too engaged, the bladder too full - oh, hell. The man took a leak on Like the freedom of peeing outside, there is a price to be paid. If Out Words is distributed at the following locations: a fence. Somebody snapped a picture and the royal junk became a you’re a member of the royal family, you get your picture snapped worldwide sensation. and shared with millions. Billings: Barjon Books, Hastings, YAP, The Loft, Good Earth Market Of course I looked. I was bored, I was curious, I’m a shallow horn If you’re a contributor, your name is placed on a list of donors Bozeman: Bozeman Community Food Co-Op, Bridger Clinic, City Brew Coffee, Gallatin dog. I felt a little dirty, glancing over my shoulder to make sure that is public knowledge. (http://californiansagainsthate.com/) Community Clinic, Leaf and Bean, Nova Café, Plonk nobody else was watching me, watching William’s willie wee. It Like Prince William, the world will know what you’re really made was like looking at an accident scene - I knew better, but couldn’t of. Helena: Bert & Ernie’s Restaurant , Birds & Beaslies , No Sweat Café , Real Food help myself. Besides, I’m more a fan of the spare and not the heir... So, Erin Pinson, of Billings, (Pechanga Resort) who gave $8,500 Market & Deli , Staggering Ox , Taco Del Sol , Tori’s Antiques & Exquisite Jewelry, Harry’s my kind of guy. and George Brimhall, CEO of Akshun & Akshun of Polson, who GamePODS, Gaia’s Galleria So now the world knows what Prince William’s nether region donated $5,000 to pass Prop 8 in California...we see you. Kalispell: City Brew Coffee, Colter Coffee, Dolce Villa, Flathead Valley Alliance, Starbucks looks like. It looks like every other one. I mean, if you’ve seen the And you both look like dicks to me. Livingston: Coffee Crossing, Montana Cup Coffee House and Bakery, The Owl

Missoula: The Badlander/Palace Billiards, Bernice’s Bakery, Betty’s Divine, Butterfly Call for artists, photographers Herbs, Catalyst, Chocolat, Crystal Video, Dan Fox Foster Homes, Dauphine’s, Ear Candy Out Words is looking for cover art for upcoming issues. If Artist Name: Stanley Upstanding Records, Fact and Fiction, FDH & Associates, Forward Montana, Front Street Pasta and you are an artist or photographer and would like to see your Location: Missoula Wraps, Taco Del Sol, Staggering Ox, The Good Food Store, The Jeanette Rankin Peace work featured on the cover of Montana’s LGBTIQ newspaper, What mediums do you work in: Digital media and textiles Center, Liquid Planet, Missoula AIDS Council, Midnight Dreams, Missoula Community contact Tell us a little about this piece: This piece is part of a series Food Coop, Pita Pit, Public Library, ClubQ Editor, [email protected]. that documents the exploits of two Montana queers traveling Also distributed to: Havre MT, Browning MT, Butte MT, Culbertson MT, We’re looking for topical work, reflecting the diversity and through the dirty south. Victor MT, Ancorage AK, Tacoma WA, Boise ID, Portland OR beauty of the Big Sky State and her LGBTIQ community. Study illustrates need for LGBT anti-discrimination More than a dozen LGBT groups immediately distanced laws themselves from the legislation. Frank and the Human Rights News Briefs By 365gay Newscenter Staff Campaign now say they will fight to ensure an inclusive ENDA is passed. PFLAG Applauds Decision to Review (Los Angeles, California) A study released Tuesday, Nov. 18, by Brad Sears, executive director of the Williams Institute, noted California’s Proposition 8 a University of California - Los Angeles think tank has found that over 3.1 million LGBT adults live in states that do not provide workplace protections. workplace discrimination against LGBT employees is as widespread “As the debate surrounding the necessity of LGBT workplace Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) as that against women and visible minorities. applauded a decision by the California Supreme Court to Currently, 20 states and the District of Columbia prohibit protections begins again in Congress we must keep in mind the review Proposition 8, a ban on same-sex marriage that was employment discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation; 13 fragile economic position of these LGBT employees and their approved by voters on November 4. of those states also prohibit gender identity discrimination. families,” Sears said in a statement. “The California Supreme Court has taken a second, bold The Williams Institute at the UCLA School of Law found that laws stand for families in the state and we welcome its decision to review prohibiting sexual orientation discrimination in the workplace are Trevor Project Gains Accreditation From National Proposition 8,” said Jody M. Huckaby, executive director of PFLAG. used as frequently by LGBT workers as laws prohibiting sex and Suicide Group “The proper checks and balances role of the judiciary is to ensure race discrimination are used by women and people of color. that majority rule doesn’t undermine minority rights, and the court Analyzing employment discrimination complaints filed with state The Trevor Project -- the nation’s only 24-hour crisis and suicide has an important role to play in that process. Loving couples and agencies in states prohibiting sexual orientation discrimination, the prevention helpline for LGBTQ youths -- received accreditation their families should be protected, not neglected, under the law. study found that five out of 10,000 LGBT people in the workforce from the American Association of Suicidology this month. Proposition 8 singled out a specific community of Californians for file sexual orientation employment discrimination complaints With the AAS endorsement, the Trevor Project is recognized as discrimination and created a category of ‘separate and unequal’ for each year, compared to sex discrimination complaints filed by five an exemplary suicide prevention program according to nationally same-sex couples. That is wrong, and the measure should be struck out of 10,000 women in the workforce and race discrimination down by the court.” complaints filed by seven out of 10,000 people of color in the recognized standards. To receive the accreditation the Trevor In May, California became the second state, following Massachusetts, workforce. Project was required to undergo an evaluation process that to grant same-sex couples the right to marry. According to the “Our analysis directly questions the popular argument that sexual looked at the organization’s administration, training, and handling Williams Institute at the University of California-Los Angeles, orientation anti-discrimination laws are unnecessary,” said study of life-threatening crises, among other topics. more than 102,000 same-sex couples live in the state, and more co-author M.V. Lee Badgett, research director at the Williams “As the only accredited LGBTQ-specific crisis and suicide than 50,000 planned to wed in the next three years. More than Institute. “They are needed and utilized by the LGBT workforce.” prevention helpline, we know our services are vital and we will 18,000 couples have already been married in the state. Following The report also addresses any worry that expanding employment remain committed to expanding our programs and national California’s decision, Connecticut has also recognized marriage discrimination to LGBT people would overwhelm state and outreach,” Charlies Robbins, executive director and CEO of The equality for lesbian and gay couples. federal agencies. “Given the size of the LGB population and the Trevor Project, said in a release. “The California Supreme Court has blessed our family,” PFLAG filing rates of LGB people, any increase in complaint intake would parents Ken and Molleen Matsumura of Oakland, California, wrote The Trevor Project can be accessed through its website or be negligible,” the study concluded. (866) 4-U-TREVOR. In 2008 calls to the helpline have increased shortly after the May decision. “All loving parents hope to see Christopher Ramos, a researcher who also worked on the study, 300 percent over last year. their child secure in the love of their chosen partner in life, if the said that in eight states sexual orientation claims surpass sex child chooses to marry. That means someone who can visit her claims; the same is true for three states when compared to race in the hospital, tell the doctors what to do if she can’t speak for claims. Gay marriage throughout New England by 2012? herself, share their earnings and insurance and support each other “Clearly, LGBT employees are not only facing a certain level By 365gay Newscenter Staff in building financial security [and] share a name if they so choose.” of discrimination, but also, taking advantage of protective state The court has invalidated three similar ballot measures in the past. policies,” Ramos said.” The Boston-based group that won equal marriage rights in California Attorney General Jerry Brown encouraged the court While almost half of the states in the country have some form to review Proposition 8, and Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger Massachusetts and Connecticut said Tuesday it intends to fight expressed strong support for the original ruling, recognizing full of LGBT protection there is no federal coverage for LGBT for gay marriage rights in the other four New England states and marriage rights for all couples. workers. predicted success by 2012. “As the court considers the future of Proposition 8, all of us The Employment Non-Discrimination Act, or ENDA, passed the US Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders announced the campaign must continue to educate Americans from every state about the House in 2007 but without protections for the transgendered. on the fifth anniversary of the Massachusetts court ruling that The legislation would make it illegal for employers to discriminate legal jeopardy our families face because of measures like these,” opened up marriage to gays and lesbians. GLAD dubbed the on the basis of sexual orientation in hiring, firing, promoting or said Huckaby. “Our opponents are already targeting other parts of campaign “Six by Twelve.” the country for campaigns similar to the one in California. From paying an employee. When ENDA returns it is likely to include gender identity “We can make New England a marriage equality zone by Massachusetts to California, and right through America’s heartland, strategically combining existing legal, electoral, and on-the- there will be a coordinated effort to roll back equality. PFLAG families protections. ground know-how to fast-track marriage in every New England have a unique role to play in combating those efforts, alongside allies ENDA, originally introduced by Rep. Barney Frank (D-Mass), such as those who brought this challenge in California, and we will included transpeople, but Frank removed those protections in state,” said GLAD Executive Director Lee Swislow. continue to do so.” committee saying it would be impossible to pass. “By 2012, we not only can have marriage equality throughout New England, we can have a road map for the rest of the country.” W O R D E N T H A N E P. C. GLAD said it would achieve this goal through litigation and by working with statewide equality groups and with MassEquality, A T T O R N E Y S A T L A W which lobbied politicians and led the fight against two bids over three years to void gay marriage through constitutional Shane A. Vannatta amendment. “The route to marriage equality looks different in each state— Suite 600 The Florence • 111 N Higgins Ave not every state is ripe for a marriage lawsuit like Massachusetts issoula s lace o e ourself M ‘ P T B Y P.O. Box 4747 • Missoula, MT 59806 and Connecticut,” said Swislow. UPCOMING EVENTS (406) 721-3400 “Through our collaboration with MassEquality, we can add value Dec. 4th (Thurs.) to the state equality groups. To the state groups’ local knowledge, World AIDS Week Dance grassroots experience and organizing strength, GLAD brings Dec. 6th (Sat.) legal and communications expertise and MassEquality brings Club Q Hosts “Dark Dreams” proven experience in legislative, political, and electoral strategy. Dec. 13th (Sat.) This combination will accelerate the pace to marriage equality.” Club Q’s 80-08 Holiday Bash!!!! >emWXekjWgk_Ya_[5 Swislow said. Dec. 31st (Wed.) Club Q’s New Years Eve. Bash!! In Connecticut ,GLAD teamed up with Love Makes A Family to achieve marriage equality. Open @ 9pm! 0 .'"
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Out Words  the University of Montana with a degree in Social Work. In the 1980’s she moved to Seattle and did social work with tribes for 16 years. After that she A&E was a police officer with the tribes for 4 years. She now lives in a small costal town in western Oregon with her partner of 9 years. After all of her experiences she decided that it was time Briefs to write about it. Kay met many interesting and

unique characters in all of her travels and many of Discussion group for gay and bisexual them are included in this book. men in Bozeman Away Games is about a group of Lesbians that are bored with weekend drag shows hosted by Gay and Bisexual men interested in signing up for the Seattle gay community. With a little assistance a weekly discussion group in Bozeman are urged from the gay male community the women create to sign up quickly, as seating is limited. five role-playing “away games” to be held at This is the group that got the ball rolling to various locations throughout the year. From a create a strong community in Bozeman. This is About the Artist: Wild West gold town to a high mountain hunting where Bozeman PFLAG, Bozeman Resource lodge, the women test their physical abilities and Sara Reynolds began her artist’s path Center and AIDS Outreach began. So many have inner strength. as a stand-up comic and expanded benefited from this group, if you want to join or I am about half way through the book and her medium to include visual arts as know someone who might be interested, please absolutely love it! The characters are all so well as live performance. Her years of tell them to contact Laura Bailey at 539-8890 to interesting and it’s very well written. When I asked practice as a massage therapist strongly request your spot. This winter’s group will be held Kay what the most difficult part of writing the influence her visual vocabulary. She on Tuesday evenings from 7 to 8:30 p.m. book was she said “Just getting people to realize often chooses images or angles that stimulate kinesthetic perceptions. She it’s out there.” She is in the editing process of her Study: Gay men less likely to cut spending holds a bachelor’s degree in social work next book, Indian Misdemeanors, which I can’t wait because of economy from the University of Montana and to read. If you want to read it for yourself the calls her camera Beatrice. She may be book can be found on Amazon.com or if you’re in A new survey shows that gay men are less likely contacted in her studio in Montana at the area, Kay was kind enough to donate a copy to cut back on spending due to the economy 406-546-3975. of her book to the centers library so come in and than heterosexuals or lesbians. The online Harris check it out! Interactive poll indicates that in several categories, gay men report being less affected by the looming 52 Ways To Be OUTSpoken: Check it out: Montana’s largest queer recession. library once a week way to advocate for family According to the survey, 55 percent of American A - - adults, 55 percent of heterosexuals, and 55 The Western Montana Gay and Lesbian equality percent of gay men expect to be affected by the Community Center is home of the state’s biggest economy, while 75 percent of lesbians express the By Family Equality Council collection of lgbtiq literature. same. When it comes to categories of expenses, With more than 1,200 books written by, for and December 7 – 13 though, the differences are more pronounced. For about our community. Over the last 10 years, since example, 45 percent of gay men are likely to reduce International Human Rights Day: Learn about the plight the Center came into existence, our community entertainment-related spending, with 61 percent has donated nearly all of these books (a few have of the LGBTQ community in other countries and what of lesbians and 51 percent of heterosexuals been purchased from The Book Exchange in reporting the same. On taking a vacation of more you can do to help at www .iglhrc .org . Missoula). than a week in the next six months, 32 percent If you cannot make it to the center, located on of gay men said that they were likely to do so, December 14 – 20 Higgens Ave. in Missoula, all titles in the Center compared to 24 percent of lesbians and 28 percent library can be found now online. Work study Participate in a holiday activity with other LGBTQ and of straight people. However, a greater percentage personnel have been busy over the last couple ally families . of gay men and lesbians -- both 60 percent -- than months putting all the books into an online heterosexuals – 56 percent -- said they were likely database located at www.librarything.com. December 21 – 27 to reduce spending on gifts during the holiday Librarything is like the Facebook of libraries, and season. Give the gift of family equality by making a donation to the center’s profile name is wmglcc. If you want The survey of 2,449 Americans over the age of to see titles of books, that may not otherwise be the Family Equality Council . 18 was conducted in October and included 232 easily accessible, check out librarything today. self-identified gay men and lesbians. In addition to the many books the Center has December 28 – January 3 available there are also videos and magazines Write and share an update letter about your family over Local Author Comes to Womyn’s Night available for checkout. Visit www.gaymontana.org at the Center the past year .Think about how things would be different (Library link on the left-hand side of the page) for a By Casey Donahue full list of resources in our library and information if your family had the same rights as others’ . Special to Out Words on librarything.com. The Family Equality Council (formerly Family Pride) is the national advocacy Also, if you would like to donate books or Kay Spang, author of the newly published book resources to the library please bring them to organization committed to securing family equality for lesbian, gay, bisexual, Away Games, was in the center this November the Center. We are currently in need of lesbian, transgender and queer parents, guardians and allies. Their work consists of and attended Womyn’s Night on November 18th feminist, and transgender books and resources strategically linked initiatives—broad in scope, but simple in vision—love, justice, to visit with us about her book and see what the for our library. Thank you for your continued community in Missoula is like these days. family, equality. support. Kay was raised in Missoula and graduated from

Out Words  percent of the vote against 39 percent for incumbent Mayor Ken universe.” (The two split briefly after the breast augmentation Hector in the nonpartisan election. and wardrobe change. But Rasmussen, feeling he’d been “shot “To be perfectly candid, the incumbent . . . and I are not bosom through the heart,” managed to win her back.) buddies -- that was a bad choice in terms,” deadpans Rasmussen. “She tolerates it nicely. She lets me be the pretty one,” he said. “Ken’s heart is in the right place, but it’s just when his mind’s “It’s not her thing, but she’s my biggest supporter, and she’s a made up, that’s it -- facts won’t change it. lovely woman.” “What was it Alexis de Tocqueville said -- his mind is not like Rasmussen already has earned Silverton a dubious measure of the fertile field onto which seeds fall. Ken . . . had a council that national notoriety among anti-homosexual activists. The West- was easy for him to get along with because, when he didn’t get boro Baptist Church of Topeka, Kan., known for its protests his way -- well truthfully, his last name is Hector, and he just kind across the country targeting gays, plans to picket Monday in of lived up to it.” downtown Silverton “to speak some words of truth to this 60- Rasmussen, who has served the last four years on the City year-old pervert,” according to the church’s website. Council, promises an era of “reasoned discourse” in the city But in a part of the country where “small town” is often used “where everybody’s going to be participating for a change.” as a synonym for redneck, Silverton appears inclined to let Stu He has pledged to help control the rapid growth that has seen and Victoria work out the details of their relationship as they new homes and an industrial park spring up in this town of about please. 9,600, and vowed to demand safety reviews of the dam upstream “He’s got a lot of supporters in this town. He’s super-avail- -- which he fears could fail during an earthquake and inundate able, and he’s so sensible,” said Brenda Marks, who helps run a the town. downtown artists co-op gallery that recently sold a photo of Hector said that growth had slowed considerably in the last Rasmussen decked out as Marilyn Monroe. “He’s not an alarmist; four years, and that the dam in question had been certified as he’s not an extremist.” being able to withstand an earthquake of 8.3. “I grew up in Southern California, and you know as well as I do: If you’re in an 8.3, you’ve got bigger worries than just a dam breaking,” he said. In years past, Silverton has been known mainly as the home of Bobbie the Wonder Dog, who got lost on a road trip to Indiana in 1923 and showed up back home in Oregon six months later, apparently having walked the 2,800 miles in between. The mayor-elect’s Then there are the annual Davenport Races, in which resi- dents propel customized couches down Main Street in honor new clothes: of Homer Davenport, a political cartoonist in the late 19th and early 20th centuries, who was born just south of town. “I like to say we’re 40 miles and 40 years from Portland. Here’s Silverton, a place you dial the wrong number and you get in a conversation anyhow,” Rasmussen says. Oregon, elects a “It’s a bucolic little town,” said City Manager Bryan Cosgrove. “We’re doing a lot of investments in our downtown, and we have transgender leader funding challenges like any other city. As for the election, I’ve kind of stayed out of all the publicity, because it’s not really about the After a major makeover, including breast surgery, the longtime city per se; it’s about Stu.” public servant is still just Stu Rasmussen to residents of this Silverton appears to have come to terms long ago with Ras- small Willamette Valley town. mussen’s nebulous gender, which he describes as “25 percent, By Kim Murphy maybe 30 percent between” man and woman, and his “adoption Used with permission of the twins,” as the mayor-elect refers to his breast surgery. But he still manages to catch some people off guard. 445 W Alder, Stu Rasmussen promised a new administration if he was elect- “Guys come up to me in the bar and say, ‘Hate to tell you ed, and he’s as good as his word: Silverton residents not only are this, but I saw this woman on the street the other day, and I’m getting a new mayor; they’re also getting a new Stu. thinking, great legs, nice tan, and she turns around and I go, ‘Oh, Rasmussen, longtime manager of the local cinema, was also my God, it’s Stu!’ “ Rasmussen recounts in the deep voice that elected mayor in 1988 and 1990, and served four years -- but seems always softened with a trace of humor. that was when he was wearing slacks and sport shirts to council “If I could have a face transplant, it’d be perfect. A face like this, meetings. The new Rasmussen -- who got breast implants a few only a mother could love. But people overlook the face now,” he years ago and began calling himself Carla Fong -- wears skirts, says, glancing discreetly down at his tank top, “because there’s all lipstick and high heels. this other real estate.” The thing is, Rasmussen’s been a fixture in this small former Not long after Rasmussen debuted his new look, the City lumber mill town so long, people tend not to pay much attention Council adopted a dress code mandating “business casual” at to what he’s wearing. council meetings. Earlier this month, Rasmussen became America’s first openly “We’re doing business for the city, and he’s showing up in outfits transgender mayor. His constituents say they elected him not that frankly were embarrassing. . . . Miniskirts and halter tops to for his looks, but because he promised to put a halt to the rapid a City Council meeting? Imagine that in Seattle or L.A.,” Hector development that has threatened Silverton’s small-town charm. said. “When you’re dressing, I’m sorry, like a $3 hooker, it’s disre- “My first two terms, I was a very straight-looking guy,” said Ras- spectful to your community.” mussen, 60, a software engineer who has written on transgender “He wanted no cleavage, no short skirts, no high heels,” Ras- issues. “Now, I writeunder the name Carla Fong, but basically mussen said, with a slight roll of the eyes. “He’d made his point; I’m Stu in Silverton. Honestly, it would be too much trouble to he’d won the game. So I just proceeded to ignore it.” retrain the whole town.” Until he takes office in January, Rasmussen is focusing on draw- Rasmussen walks down Silverton’s Norman Rockwell-like main ing in patrons to his large, 1950s-style, 40-foot-screen cinema street in a plunging purple top revealing impressive cleavage, with full digital sound, which at the moment is “hemorrhaging with a tight black miniskirt, flowing red locks and dagger-like cash.” He is also trying to market a coin-operated multi-player red nails. trivia game he designed for bars and restaurants. He is stopped every few feet by people who want to shake his Much of the rest of the time he spends with his girlfriend of hand and congratulate him on his victory, in which he took 52 35 years, Victoria Sage, whom he describes as “the light of my

Out Words  AIDS official blasts Russia as infections rise forced his predecessor to resign. ERs are so busy and there’s confusion about how much HIV ‘It seems ... we still have no national policy on fighting AIDS,’ Now Chile is launching an intense campaign to locate and counseling is needed. director says inform the patients. But Bartlett demonstrated how to quickly give people a chance Erazo said it would be done with the most confidentiality to either opt out or request counseling: “Mr. Jones, you’re going MOSCOW - A top Russian anti-AIDS coordinator on Friday possible. But it appears some health workers weren’t getting to have a cholesterol test, a blood count, and an HIV test - and lambasted the government’s approach to fighting HIV, saying that message. by the way we do the HIV test on everybody because that’s what the CDC has recommended. Is there any part of this that you the number of registered cases was growing 10 percent a year In Puerto Montt, a man who refused to be identified by name want more information about or you don’t want to have?” despite increased federal funding. said two health officials arrived at his workplace in an ambulance, A misguided focus on treatment instead of prevention has and in the presence of his boss, told him he was HIV-positive. ‘Conscience Rule’ Creates Quandary for Hospitals undermined efforts to combat AIDS, said Vadim Pokrovsky, head “I lost my job and my girlfriend” as a result, the man told Radio By Iulia Anghelescu - WeNews correspondent of the state-funded Federal AIDS Center, which is charged with Cooperativa of Santiago. “My family is broken.” coordinating efforts. Of 18,500 AIDS cases registered in Chile since 1984, 5,710 Now that Sen. Barack Obama is president-elect, some pro- “It seems to me that we still have no national policy on fighting people have died of the disease, Erazo said. choice activists don’t think it’s so dire that President Bush is on AIDS,” Pokrovsky said. “We are running in place, and meanwhile the brink of signing a health-policy rule that could restrict access HIV is spreading.” Small gains in HIV testing, but bigger steps urged to contraception and abortion. Each day about 130 new cases are registered in Russia, Pokrovsky From 365 Gay Gloria Feldt, for one, sees it as the flutters of a lame duck. said, estimating there are more than 1 million Russians infected Used with permission “I suspect the ‘conscience rule’ will be the last gift of the Bush with HIV — or almost 1 percent of the country’s 142 million administration to the anti-choice groups,” said Feldt, an author, population — though officially Russia has registered less than (Washington) Two years after the government urged making HIV activist and the former director of the Planned Parenthood half that number at 470,000. tests as common as cholesterol checks, there are small gains but Federation of America in New York. “The good news is that A large number are young drug users infected by dirty needles still one in five people infected with the AIDS virus doesn’t know President-elect Barack Obama can change it by executive order or tainted communal drug supplies, experts say. it, scientists say. when in office.” Eleven states that once required special consent for HIV testing But for as long as it lasts, the rule--issued as a draft proposal However, widespread social stigmas, misinformation and official have changed their laws, a key step to making an HIV test part of by the Health and Human Services Department in August and denial mean many people remain unaware they are at risk of the standard battery that patients expect. under public review through late September--could complicate being infected with HIV, the virus that causes AIDS. But HIV specialists said other barriers include physician legal and financial life for any federally funded institution, said Some regional governors “have simply refused to acknowledge confusion about the ease of today’s rapid tests, which can cost as Adam Donfield, senior public policy associate at the New York- the problem of AIDS,” Pokrovsky said. Others, assuming higher little as $15 - although many patients seem to accept them. based Guttmacher Institute. spending would make the problem go away, have done little to No more than 100 of the nation’s 5,000 emergency rooms About 580,000 federally funded institutions--including 89 publicize the problem, he said. routinely test for HIV in patients who aren’t critically ill, said Dr. percent of all hospitals--would be affected, according to the “Everyone needs to understand that this is a threat to the John Bartlett of Johns Hopkins University, who co-chaired the Department of Health and Human Services. nation, and it’s necessary to mobilize as one would for war,” Forum for Collaborative HIV Research meeting. Yet because so Under the rule, any worker involved in the delivery of health Pokrovsky said. many HIV patients are poor or uninsured, ERs are the health- care--including doctors, pharmacists, nurses, volunteers and He urged the government to devise a clear strategy for care setting most likely to find them. interns--would be able to refuse to provide any medical informing citizens about HIV, and said funding would have to be And while every pregnant woman is supposed to be tested so procedure or medication based on moral, ethical or religious beliefs if they work at an institution that receives federal aid. used more wisely for results. steps can be taken to protect her unborn baby, about 40 percent aren’t, he added. Given the widespread moral and religious opposition to Starting in 2006, the government — enriched with oil-boom “Those are what we call missed opportunities,” Bartlett said. abortion, the rule is widely seen as a gambit to restrict access proceeds — exponentially increased funding for the battle against Today, the test is “much better, it’s much easier, it’s much cheaper. to abortion or to enable medical professionals to avoid referring AIDS as part of a push to improve health care and stem Russia’s The treatment is really great now.” patients to abortion services. However, the conscience rule also population decline. The government says budget spending for Just over 1.1 million Americans are estimated to have HIV and would allow health care providers to refuse to provide a range of HIV-related activities last year amounted to 10.7 billion rubles 232,000 don’t know it, according to the Centers for Disease reproductive health services, including abortions but also birth ($445 million) and was more than 50 times higher than in 2005. Control and Prevention. control, including emergency contraception, without exception. Pokrovsky said it is spending at least 7.1 billion rubles ($270 The CDC for years recommended routine testing mainly for “It appears that one penalty under this regulation will be to lose million) on HIV/AIDS programs this year, including 5.1 billion people at high-risk, such as intravenous drug users. Then, finally, the federal funds under a specific program,” said Donfield, adding rubles ($193 million) on drug treatments for 30,000 HIV-infected came drugs potent enough to keep HIV patients healthy for that that could extend to all Medicare and Medicaid funds upon patients, but only 200 million rubles ($7.6 million) for prevention years, postponing the slide into full-blown AIDS. Yet nearly half of which hospitals critically depend. “Effectively, it means medical — which he called inadequate. new infections still were being discovered too late for patients institutions will have to disobey their own state laws to keep “This is the weakest point in our work: prevention of new cases to benefit. Not to mention that people who don’t know they’re their access to funding.” infected unwittingly spread the virus. of infection,” he said. “We are doing practically nothing about So in September 2006, the CDC recommended routine testing this.” Effort to Restrict Access for everyone ages 13 to 64, whether they think they’re at risk He said the state plans to increase spending further in coming for HIV or not. years, but expressed concern that the deepening economic crisis Many Catholic hospitals and health care providers are already There is no nationwide data yet on the new guidelines’ impact, legally exempt from performing abortions but still have to comply could jeopardize those plans. CDC’s Dr. Bernard Branson told The Associated Press. with state laws requiring that they offer rape victims emergency The money that is earmarked for prevention was often being But Branson listed encouraging signs: contraception, which prevents pregnancy if taken within 72 hours misspent, he said, citing an example of a 100 million ruble ($3.6 -New York City’s Health and Hospitals Corporation, the nation’s of unprotected intercourse. million) AIDS awareness TV program that aired at 8:30 a.m. largest municipal health system, has nearly tripled HIV testing Currently, 16 states require hospitals to provide emergency nationwide — a time when the audience was mostly pensioners - and late diagnoses dropped by about a third. contraception or information about it to sexual assault victims. and unlikely to be in any high-risk groups. -New York’s state Medicaid program has increased testing by 30 Lois Uttley is director of MergerWatch Project, a New-York based percent. national initiative dedicated to protecting patients’ rights. She says Chile faces HIV scare -Early results from a federal survey suggest 2.4 million more the rule reaches beyond abortion and could restrict an array of people in 2007 said they had ever been tested for HIV than said services that run astride religious teachings, including routine forms so in 2006. (Santiago) Chile is scrambling to reach people who could be of birth control and emergency contraception, which involves a -President George W. Bush in October signed a law allowing heavy dose of contraceptive hormones. unknowingly spreading AIDS. Veterans Administration clinics to ease testing requirements. Health Minister Alvaro Erazo told legislators that public health “The proposed regulation will allow providers to refuse to give “I don’t think anyone at CDC anticipated that we would test women any service that they wanted,” Uttley said. services failed to tell 512 people that they had tested positive the whole country in a single year,” Branson said. Speedily approved in August by the Office of Management and for HIV. But in pilot projects around the country, “people are taking the Budget and backed by the United States Conference of Catholic Erazo also said that private-sector services failed to inform an recommendations to heart and implementing them as much as Bishops, the rule is opposed by a broad array of groups, including the estimated 1,700 more of their HIV-positive status. was feasible for them,” he added. Moreover, “we find people are Chicago-based American Medical Association. Over 127 Democrats Chile’s public health service said some patients provided very receptive to being tested, and there was concern about in Congress co-signed a letter to the Health and Human Services incorrect addresses, but in about half the cases there is no that before.” Department opposing the rule during the public comment period evidence anyone tried to reach them. Indeed, studies suggest more than 80 percent of emergency- in September. Six Republican lawmakers sent their own letter of Erazo was summoned to Congress to explain after the scandal room patients were amenable to an HIV test while most ER opposition, as did attorneys general from 13 states. workers opposed testing them. Why? Presumably because

Out Words  Last week, the New York Times reported that three officials from the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission were increasingly valueless society. Is this really what religious values opposing it on the grounds of religious discrimination. in America has come to, opposition to gay marriage? Gays as What do you think would do more to save heterosexual Salvos from Activists marriage in America? Making sure gays can’t get hitched, or changing the tax code so that marital counseling among Throughout this week an array of pro-choice activists, including heterosexual couples becomes tax-deductible so that couples the New York-based Center for Reproductive Rights and Web the New can actually afford the help they need? What should religion be sites including RH Reality Check, have fired off salvos against the rule, which carries an enforcement price tag of $44.5 million devoting its energy to? Opposing gay marriage in California, or and requires federally funded hospitals to allow any of their supporting an effective national campaign for school vouchers health care delivery workers to decline to provide medical so that parents can afford to send their children to schools procedures they consider morally objectionable. Activists fear Religious that teach religious values like male respect for women and that exemption could be expansive, such as the right to refuse the sanctity of a loving relationship? to test a patient for HIV or to provide fertility treatments to a I have devoted my entire life to saving marriage. I have counseled same-sex couple. thousands of couples in crisis. I have authored twenty books The institutions concerned by the proposal represent “the Bogeyman on spirituality and relationships. Never once have I believed majority of the country’s medical institutions,” Kim Gandy, By Rabbi Shmuley Boteach that by opposing homosexuality I was bringing a husband and president of the Washington-based National Organization for Special to Out Words, used with permission wife closer together. Rather, by seeking to increase the desire Women, told Women’s eNews. between husband and wife and by fostering true emotional Gandy said the consequence for rape victims could be intimacy between them, I was working to ensure that fewer emergency staff who refuse to tell the patient that emergency Opponents of President Bush chart the erosion of his American children would end up like me, the product of a contraception exists. She said that would be particularly hard presidency to the war in Iraq, the failure to initially address on younger women, who are often unaware of the medication the Katrina devastation, and the breakdown of the American broken home. Homosexuality is nothing but a distraction. and can only receive it by prescription. “Sixty percent of forcible banking system. All of this may be so, but it is equally likely that America has serious social problems. Fifty percent of all rapes occur before the victim is 18 years old,” she said. the outgoing President did much good for which he is given marriages end in divorce. Forty million married Americans The rule is intended to protect the First Amendment religious little credit. Be that as it may, I identify President Bush’s going are in platonic marriages. One out of three American women rights of heath care providers, say supporters, such as the off message to another event entirely. In the aftermath of the are on an anti-depressant. Innumerable men are deeply into Washington-based Family Research Council; the Christian 9/11 attacks, the President’s famous reaction was to encourage pornography. Our teenagers have unacceptably high rates Medical Association in Virginia Beach, Va.; the American Life the country to go on a shopping spree. “Get down to Disney of sexuality and pregnancy. And yet, I cannot name a single League in Stafford, Va.; and Concerned Women for America in World in Florida,” he urged just over two weeks after 9/11. religious initiative that appeared on a single ballot to combat Washington, D.C. any of these problems, save for Proposition 8 in California that Forty-six states have passed conscience laws protecting “Take your families and enjoy life, the way we want it to be enjoyed.” There are times when a great nation awakens from a sought to ban gay marriage. Let’s be honest: Gays don’t have to individual health care providers; 27 have passed laws protecting kill off heterosexual marriage. We straight people have done the right of conscience for institutions, according to the materialistic slumber and experiences an urge for spirituality a fine job already. Guttmacher Institute. and togetherness. And those are the wrong times to turn their hearts back to shopping malls and the impulse purchase. What religion suffers from, not just in our time but for all Few of us living in the United States can believe the extent time, is its dualistic impulse. Simply stated, religion seems to Developing Policy Framework of the financial meltdown in our country. I have consistently need enemies. Many religious people thrive on an us and them maintained that it is devastation born of a spiritual crisis. For mentality. The G-dly and the G-dless. The righteous and the Three major federal statutes aimed at protecting physicians’ too long we Americans have tried to plug the gaping holes at sinful. The forces of light battling the forces of darkness. conscience rights were enacted in the last 35 years. our center with fancier clothing, bigger homes, and the latest But Judaism’s vision of a religious future is monist, one in The most recent, the 2004 “Weldon Amendment,” allows the gadgets. We have thought that shopping was an acceptable which all people will come together to create a just and federal government to withhold funding from states that require alternative for a true spiritual calling. This failure to awaken compassionate society. The prophet Isaiah said that in the medical professionals, clinics, hospitals, health maintenance the nation to a higher spiritual purpose is in turn a failure of future, “I shall bring them to my holy mountain, and I shall organizations or insurance companies to provide abortions or religion itself. make them joyous in my Home... for My Temple shall be called abortion referrals. a House of Prayer for all peoples.” The future of religion in Under the proposed rule, health workers also could refuse to All across our nation, religion is being ridiculed and is on the America and abroad is one in which religion finds the good in refer patients to another professional more willing to provide retreat. The 80 million born-again Christians who had such others even as it maintains its standards and morals. Pastors the needed medicine or procedure, without further blame, a pronounced role in Bush’s two victories were impotent in leaving the patient in quandary. the last election. Bill Maher and a host of other atheists make may oppose gay marriage. But given the limited resources “There is a real chance the largest impact of the rule would be a financial killing by portraying religious people as knuckle- available to religion and the social rot that is all around us, on poor women,” said Celine Mizrahi, legislative counsel for the dragging Neanderthals who swallow faith uncritically and send can we not dedicate those resources to ends that unite and U.S. program of the New York-based Center for Reproductive their money to charlatan televangelists who fly around in their inspire instead of divide and alienate? Rights. Because low-income women are more likely to be gas-guzzling G5’s. My plan to save the American family does not involve fighting uninsured or have access to reproductive health care, they Indeed, great defenders of the faith would be forgiven if they any group, but rather bequeathing the Jewish Sabbath as a gift are less likely to seek out another health care provider if their were to conclude that in America religion is losing its focus as all the American people. I propose that we “Turn Friday Night doctor refuses some services. well as its rational dimension. into Family Night” throughout the nation, with millions of A February 2007 study published in the New England Journal families committing to having dinner with their children with of Medicine found that 86 percent of 1,144 physicians who Take the American religious obsession with homosexuals. Last week, This World: The Jewish Values Network, which the TV and cell phone off, with guests invited so that hospitality participated in the study said they believed they should present is practiced, with children being heard by their parents with all options to patients despite their own personal objections. I founded, hosted a debate between a leading evangelical the noise of the world filtered out, and with husbands and Eight percent said they felt no obligation to provide information scholar and myself on whether Judaism and Christianity are they personally objected to. religions of peace. My opponent, a man of great learning and wives focusing on each other rather than the myriad actors Already a large percentage of women are unaware of emergency even greater decency, made it clear that in stating “Love your that invade their home through television. contraception, which has been prescribed in the United States enemies,” Jesus included Osama bin Laden. Yet, when it came An ancient Jewish legend says that when the whole world for 25 years. In August 2006 the Food and Drug Administration to gay men who want to get married, he seemed to concur keeps just one Sabbath the Messiah will come. For our time authorized nonprescription sales for women 18 and over. that were this to happen the whole of American society would perhaps this means that when religion chooses to give the “Many young women don’t know that Plan B is an option, and if begin to unweave. Indeed, I have heard some of my evangelical world something that unites rather than divides, redemption they are not told about it, the likelihood of unwanted pregnancies brethren make it sound as if gays were a greater danger to will finally come. and abortions will increase,” NOW’s Gandy said. America than terrorists. The proposed rule threatens the right to comprehensive health I will not in this column get into the arguments for and EDITOR’S NOTE: Rabbi Shmuley Boteach is the founder of This care of 272,350 women raped every year, said Katherine Hull, against gay marriage. What I will say is that religion in America World: The Jewish Values Network. His new book The Kosher Sutra: communication director of the Washington-based Rape Abuse Eight Sacred Secrets of Desire will be published in January. Incest National Network. has made homosexuality into a false bogeyman, which has Because so many rapes go unreported, she said the impact seriously distracted religion from giving real values to an could be much higher.

Out Words  Across U.S., Big Rallies for Same-Sex Marriage By JESSE McKINLEY And while some speakers were obviously eager to tap crowds’ The protests over Proposition 8 also come even as same- Additional reporting by Ken Spencer current outrage, others took pains to cast the demonstrations sex marriages began Wednesday in Connecticut, which joined Used with Permission as a peaceful, long-term, campaign over an issue that has proved Massachusetts as the only states allowing such ceremonies. By remarkably and consistently divisive. contrast, 30 states have constitutional bans on such unions. SAN FRANCISCO — In one of the nation’s largest displays “We need to be our best selves,” said the Rev. G. Penny Nixon, a At a Boston rally on Saturday, Kate Leslie, an organizer, said the of support for gay rights, tens of thousands of people in cities gay pastor from San Mateo, Calif., who warned the San Francisco loss in California had certainly caught the attention of local gay across the country turned out in support of same-sex marriage crowd against blaming “certain communities” for the election men and lesbians who have had the right to marry since 2004. on Saturday, Nov. 15, lending their voices to an issue that many loss. “This is a movement based on love.” “You’re watching people who could be you and are part of your gay men and lesbians consider a critical step to full equality. The protests were organized largely over the Internet, and community being stripped of their rights,” Ms. Leslie said. “And in The demonstrations — from a sun-splashed throng in San featured few representatives of major some ways that’s why so many people Francisco to a chilly crowd in Minneapolis — came 11 days after gay rights groups that campaigned are infuriated in Massachusetts and California voters narrowly passed a ballot measure, Proposition against Proposition 8, which passed with “We have willing to stand up for a rally.” 8, that outlawed previously legal same-sex ceremonies in the 52 percent of the vote after trailing In California, a State Supreme Court state. The measure’s passage has spurred protests in California for months in the polls. The online decision legalized same-sex marriage and across the country, including at several Mormon temples, a aspect seemed to draw a broad cross- in May. As many as 18,000 couples reflection of that church’s ardent backing of the proposition. section of people, like Nicole Toussaint, rights as married, some traveling from other On Saturday, speakers painted the fight over Proposition 8 as a kindergarten teacher who joined a states to tie the knot. Such marriages another test of a movement that began with the riots at the crowd of more than 1,000 people in may be challenged in court. Stonewall Inn in New York in 1969, survived the emergence Minneapolis. David McMullin, a garden designer of the AIDS crisis in the 1980s, and has since made enormous “I’m here to support my friends who people even from Atlanta, was one of those who strides in societal acceptance, whether in television shows or in are gay,” said Ms. Toussaint, 23. “I think my made the trip, marrying his partner in antidiscrimination laws. generation will play a big role.” Oakland, Calif., in September, in part “It’s not ‘Yes we can,’ ” said Tom Ammiano, a San Francisco The big crowds notwithstanding, it if we don’t to let their two adoptive children feel city supervisor, referring to President-elect Barack Obama’s has been a tough month for gay rights. part of a married family. campaign mantra. “It’s ‘Yes we will.’ ” Proposition 8 was just one of three “We just want our kids to know Carrying handmade signs with slogans like “No More Mr. Nice measures on same-sex marriage passed we’re O.K.,” said Mr. McMullin, who Gay” and “Straights Against Hate,” big crowds filled civic centers on Nov. 4, with constitutional bans also have rights had come to a protest in front of and streets in many cities. In New York, some 4,000 people being approved in Arizona and Florida. the Georgia State Capitol. “We have gathered at City Hall, where speakers repeatedly called same- In Arkansas, voters passed a measure rights as people even if we don’t have sex marriage “the greatest civil rights battle of our generation.” aimed at barring gay men and lesbians rights as citizens.” “We are not going to rest at night until every citizen in every as citizens.” Supporters of the proposition have state in this country can say, ‘This is the person I love,’ and take repeatedly argued that Proposition their hand in marriage,” said Representative Anthony D. Weiner 8 was not antigay, but merely pro- of Brooklyn. marriage. In Los Angeles, where wildfires had temporarily grabbed “Marriage is between a man and a woman,” said Frank Schubert, headlines from continuing protests over Proposition 8, Mayor the campaign manager for Protect Marriage, the leading group Antonio R. Villaraigosa addressed a crowd of about 9,000 people behind passing Proposition 8. “If they want to legalize same-sex in Spanish and English, and seemed to express confidence that marriage, they are gong to have to bring a proposal before the the measure, which is being challenged in California courts, people of California. That’s how democracy works.” would be overturned. Equality California, a major gay rights group here, indicated “I’ve come here from the fires because I feel the wind at my this week that it would work to repeal Proposition 8 if legal back as well,” said the mayor, who arrived at a downtown rally challenges fail. from the fire zone on a helicopter. “It’s the wind of change that Such dry approaches seemed a million miles away, however, has swept the nation. It is the wind of optimism and hope.” from the boisterous scene in front of San Francisco City Hall About 900 protesters braved a tornado watch and menacing on Saturday, where as many as 10,000 people gathered, carrying rain clouds in Washington to rally in front of the Capitol and on signs, American flags and even copies of their marriage licenses. to the White House. “Gay, straight, black, white; marriage is a civil One of those was Lawrence Dean, 57, who had married his right,” the marchers chanted. partner, Steven Lyle, in San Francisco in July. It was the fifth time In Las Vegas, the comedian Wanda Sykes surprised a crowd that the couple of 19 years had held a ceremony to announce of more than 1,000 rallying outside a gay community center by from adopting children. their commitment, and, of course, accept wedding gifts. announcing that she is gay and had wed her wife in California That vote was on the minds of many of the 200 people who “If we keep this up, maybe I won’t have to again,” Mr. Dean said, on Oct. 25. Ms. Sykes, who divorced her husband of seven years protested Saturday in front of the State Capitol in Little Rock. looking out at the protest. “I have enough pots and pans.” in 1998, had never publicly discussed her sexual orientation but One of those, Barb L’Eplattenier, 39, a university professor, said said the passage of Proposition 8 had propelled her to be open some of her gay friends with adopted children were fearful of Reporting was contributed by Robbie Brown from Atlanta; Steve Barnes about it. state action if they appeared in public. “They think their families from Little Rock; Christina Capecchi from Minneapolis; Francesca “I felt like I was being attacked, personally attacked — our are in danger,” said Ms. L’Eplattenier, who married her partner, Segrè from Los Angeles; Katie Zezima from Boston; Ashley Southall community was attacked,” she told the crowd. Sarah Scanlon, in California in July. from Washington; Steve Friess from Las Vegas; and C. J. Hughes from Montana rallies with pride in Billings, Missoula and Bozeman Joining our brothers and sisters in love, lgbtiq and friends cluding marriage as a right for all Americans – “A Day without held simultaneous rallies in Billings, Missoula and Bozeman on Gays.” Saturday, Nov. 15. To be held on Wednesday, Dec. 10, the event urges all members The rallies were enthusiastic, loud and fun. They also opened of the lgbtiq community and straight allies to call in gay and vol- the eyes of local residents who were reminded that full equality unteer for service in their town, city or community. doesn’t exist for all Americans. “We contribute more than $700 billion to the American econ- In Bozeman, more than 100 people gathered in front of the omy and we deserve the same rights as all other Americans,” court house on Main Street, holding signs and chanting at pass- said one of the organizers. “Because marriage is a basic human ing traffic. Reports from Missoula and Billings reflect the rallies right that should be available for all Americans, regardless of were successful and a dialog has begun under the Big Sky. gender, race or religion.” Next on the agenda? For more information, a list of volunteer and protest opportu- A nationwide strike and boycott in support of equality, in- nities, go to: http://daywithoutagay.org/

Out Words  Next Steps For LGBT California State Supreme Court rejoins Prop. 8 battle Civil Rights Bob Egelko, Chronicle Staff Writer “We could have been looking, easily, at two or three years of litigating by Christine C. Quinn The California state Supreme Court plunged back into the same-sex this issue,” said Shannon Minter, legal director of the National Center marriage wars Wednesday, Nov. 20, agreeing to decide the legality of for Lesbian Rights and a lawyer for same-sex couples in one of the Since Election Day, I, like many LGBT Americans and their allies, a ballot measure that repealed the right of gay and lesbian couples to suits. “It’s a great relief that the court recognizes the importance of have felt torn in two. On November 4th I was overjoyed to see wed in California. resolving this quickly.” Barack Obama become President-elect of the United States, and Six months after its momentous ruling that struck down the Similar reactions came from others on opposing sides in the case. incredibly proud that the LGBT community played a central role state’s ban on same-sex marriage, the court granted requests by “This is a great day for the rule of law and for the voters of California,” in his victory. I was full of optimism at the prospect of a real ally both sponsors and opponents of Proposition 8 to review lawsuits said Andrew Pugno, attorney for Protect Marriage, Prop. 8’s sponsoring in the White House, a president who has mentioned and credited challenging the Nov. 4 initiative. group, which won permission from the court Wednesday to join the the LGBT community in every major political speech he has given The vote was 6-1, Justice Joyce Kennard dissenting. case and present arguments at the hearing. He said he was confident since 2004. However, the court refused, 6-1, to let same-sex marriages resume the measure would be upheld and was particularly pleased that the But then I woke on November 5th, to discover that hope and while it considers Prop. 8’s constitutionality. Justice Carlos Moreno court allowed it to remain in effect while the lawsuits are argued. change were not coming to all Americans. Amendment 2 in Flori- cast the dissenting vote. San Francisco City Attorney Dennis Herrera, whose suit on behalf of da, Proposition 102 in Arizona and Proposition 8 in California had Approved by 52 percent of voters, Prop. 8 restored the definition the city has been joined or endorsed by 11 other cities and counties, all passed, denying civil rights to thousands of LGBT families. of marriage - a union of a man and a woman - that the court had said he was grateful the court accepted the cases. And I found myself asking: How could our nation embrace a overturned May 15. Kennard and Moreno voted with the majority in “This goes far beyond same-sex marriage,” Herrera said. “It’s about movement for change, while three of its states voted to reject the that 4-3 ruling. equal protection of the law for all Californians.” rights of an entire group of Americans? Could this be real? And The court agreed to review two arguments by opponents of Prop. what did this mean for the future of our LGBT community? 8: that the measure exceeds the legal scope of a ballot initiative by Amendment or revision? I’ve carried that last question with me for the past two weeks. allowing a majority to restrict a minority group’s rights, and that it And on Wednesday and Saturday I got my answer, when I partici- violates the constitutional separation of powers by limiting judicial The lawsuits that the court agreed to review were filed by two pated in two rallies that responded to this injustice. authority. groups of same-sex couples, a gay-rights organization, and San Neither event was organized by established, well-funded institu- The justices also asked for arguments on whether Prop. 8, if Francisco and other local governments. Civil rights, religious and tions. They were fueled by modern day grassroots efforts. Thou- constitutional, would nullify 18,000 same-sex weddings performed feminist organizations have since filed separate suits challenging Prop. sands came together through word of mouth, text messages from between when the court’s marriage ruling took effect in mid-June and 8 that the justices may add to their docket. a friend, or internet organizing. They were joined together as a Nov. 4. Attorney General Jerry Brown, who will defend Prop. 8 as the All the suits argue that Prop. 8, drafted as a state constitutional community by a desire for justice and equality. state’s chief lawyer, contends those marriages are legal, but sponsors amendment, makes such drastic changes that it amounts to a revision On Saturday, when I took the stage at a rally outside City Hall, of the initiative disagree. of the Constitution. the crowd stretched so far that you couldn’t see the end. It took The justices asked for written arguments to be submitted through Unlike constitutional amendments, which can qualify for the ballot my breath away. The number and dedication of those gathered Jan. 21. The court could hold a hearing as early as March, and a ruling with signatures on initiative petitions, revisions can be placed on rivaled any demonstration I’ve seen in recent history. would be due 90 days later. the ballot only by a two-thirds vote of the Legislature or a state I started to look at the faces in the crowd. It almost moved me constitutional convention. to tears when I saw the looks in their eyes -- their smiles, their Kennard’s vote a bad sign? The state’s high court has defined a constitutional revision as a energy and optimism. They were not defeated; they were empow- fundamental change in government structure and has struck down ered, fueled by the possibility and the wonder of equality. While both sides cheered the court’s decision to take up the cases, only two initiatives as revisions. Of course people are angry -- I myself am angry. But what is sig- Kennard’s lone vote to deny review could spell trouble for opponents The last time was in 1991, when the court overturned provisions of a nificant today is that our community has taken an anger that might of Prop. 8. measure that would have required California courts to follow federal have turned to bitterness, and molded it instead into strength and Kennard is the court’s longest-serving justice, having been appointed standards on criminal defendants’ rights rather than relying on the action. We need to take this strength to our state capitals, and tell in 1989, and has been one of its foremost supporters of same-sex state Constitution to grant broader rights. them that we are full citizens and deserve to have full and equal couples’ rights. Without her vote, the May 15 ruling would have Opponents of Prop. 8 argue that it is a revision because it deprives rights under the law. gone the other way. But she wrote Wednesday that she would favor a historically persecuted minority of fundamental rights and leaves The LGBT community’s future is one of immeasurable possibility. hearing arguments only about whether Prop. 8 would invalidate the courts powerless to intervene. It’s bright and bold, strong and hopeful, and as limitless as freedom pre-election marriages, an issue that would arise only if the initiative A ruling upholding the measure would leave any minority group itself. Our community knows that our country is supposed to were upheld. vulnerable to repeal of its rights by majority vote, the lawsuits argue. be the land of the free, where one can engage in the pursuit of “It’s always hard to read tea leaves, but I think Justice Kennard is Supporters of Prop. 8 say it is merely a constitutional amendment happiness. On Saturday we once again demonstrated that we are saying that she thinks the constitutionality of Prop. 8 is so clear that it restoring the traditional definition of marriage and leaves the committed to making it so! doesn’t warrant review,” said Stephen Barnett, a retired UC Berkeley structure of state government unaffected. They contend that a ruling law professor and longtime observer of the court. overturning the measure would strike a blow to the people’s power For those seeking to overturn Prop. 8, “I would not think it would to change their Constitution by initiative. be encouraging,” said Dennis Maio, a San Francisco lawyer and former In its May ruling legalizing same-sex marriages, the court said staff attorney at the court. California’s ban on such unions violated gays’ and lesbians’ right to marry the partner of their choice and to be free of arbitrary Speedy timeline discrimination. The court also said laws that discriminate on the basis of sexual All parties were pleased, though, at the prospect of a quick decision. orientation are presumed to be unconstitutional, in the same category If the justices had dismissed the suits, the cases could have been refiled as bias based on race or sex. That part of the ruling is unaffected by in a county Superior Court and would have reached the high court Prop. 8. only after lengthy appeals. Subway Franchisee Retracts Yes on 8 Gift PageOneQ.com blogger Mike Rogers put the pressure on fast-food three demands: Repudiate the gift, expand the corporation’s to ‘...not use the Trademark in a manner that degrades, diminishes, chain Subway last week after finding on a list compiled by the Human nondiscrimination policy to include sexual orientation and gender or detracts from the goodwill of the business associated with the Rights Campaign that a Subway franchise owner had donated $2,500 identity, and give an equal donation to the opposing side. Trademark’ and ‘to promptly change the manner of such use if to Yes on 8 -- using the company’s name. Not only did he get the He got two out of three. requested to do so by us.’” franchise owner to request that the gift be returned, he got Subway Subway director of corporate communications Michele DiNello DiNello said that the franchise owner has requested a refund of his to confirm that the company is expanding its nondiscrimination wrote in an e-mail to Rogers that not only will the franchise owner gift from Yes on 8. She also said that the company is currently in the policy to include “sexual orientation” and “gender identity.” who made the donation be getting an e-mail, but “we will be sending process of changing nondiscrimination policy language. PageOneQ.com blogger Mike Rogers put the pressure on fast-food to our franchisees and developers -- around the world -- the policy chain Subway last week after finding on a list compiled by the Human regarding political donations.” “The company used the exact language you gave us,” she wrote, Rights Campaign that a Subway franchise owner had donated $2,500 The e-mail reminded franchise owners that “your franchise referring to Rogers’s request to add “both sexual orientation and to Yes on 8 -- using the company’s name. agreement prohibits your use of the Subway trademark as part of gender identity” to its nondiscrimination policy. (Ross von Metzke, Rogers immediately reached out to Subway headquarters with your business or corporate name. Further, it states that you agree The Advocate) Out Words  Ollie Coburn: A man with a tale to tell By Hobie Hare, Coburn, married three times and twice widowed, is still very said Coburn. This, along with his former wives’ understanding, Special to Out Words active socially, with hobbies including amateur radio and reading. allowed him to more honestly express himself, while balancing He has two daughters and “lots of grandchildren”, and makes no which door he presented to the public. Ninety-two- year-old secret of his orientation to those who know or meet him. His Coburn feels that it is much easier for men and women of all Ollie Coburn has radio career led him to Butte, Libby, Kalispell, Billings, and Wolf ages to “come out” and be themselves today, but commented plenty of tales to tell, Point, Montana, and other places, but Coburn has considered that the media and many other organizations primarily focus on most of them true. northwest Montana home since the 1940s. younger and middle-aged populations, with missed opportunities One is that he came Libby’s first radio station was KLCB, which Coburn co-founded for involving older LGBTIQ populations. His next closest age- dangerously close and owned. mates at the last Western Montana Gay Men’s Health Retreat to being born in a KLCB, along with then U.S. Senator Mike Mansfield and many this past October, for example, were in their early to mid 60s. manger on a late others, prodded Libby and other Lincoln County residents to On a positive note, Coburn added that “The media is opening winter’s night in New weigh in on proposals for construction of the Libby Dam, which up on their reluctance to talk about the health aspects of York City in 1916. His created Lake Koocanusa on the Kootenai River, and generated condom use and the need for HIV testing. This helps to educate mother, and a taxi power for an increasingly thirsty Pacific Northwest in the the public and lessen the sex hysteria by openly discussing such driver, delivered him early 1950s. Thus a strong precedent was established for local matters in a sensible and unabashed manner”. instead, right inside input regarding future dam construction decisions, rather than Some things, Coburn said, haven’t changed at all, such as drag the taxi. His earliest unquestioningly sacrificing rural Montanans’ livelihoods for the shows, fundraisers, and other community events to support years were often benefit of populations downstream in both the Columbia and those in need, regardless of their orientation. His advice to spent sleeping in hotel Missouri river basins. people questioning their orientation or newly coming out “is to room drawer chests, Coburn has been retired for more than two decades now, but overcome fear, and consider whatever is holding [them] hostage. his older brother is far from retiring in other respects. “ sleeping in the closet He has been active politically since the 1930s, casting his first Oliver Coburn, 92 years young, looks forward to participating and his parents in a double bed, due to his father’s frequent presidential ballot cast for Franklin Delano Roosevelt (for whom at the Pride Festival in Kalispell next June. He may not be in travels working with the motion picture industry Coburn, not he voted four times). “I voted for him on the strength of his drag, as he was at the Flathead Valley Alliance Halloween party surprisingly, has pretty much been on the go ever since. promises and he fulfilled every one of them to the letter”, said in October 2007, but he aims to be there. Although at the time Coburn, who is bisexual and lives in northwest Montana, feels Coburn. “The W.P.A., C.C.C., and legislation to the benefit of the of this report (November 2008), he is recovering at the North that for many gays, lesbians, bisexuals and other sexual minorities, working class will be long remembered”. Valley Hospital in Whitefish from a fracture to his right femur, the closet is not as apt a metaphor as is the revolving door, In 2008, Coburn voted for the Obama-Biden ticket, though he undoubtedly a minor obstacle in his unstoppable mission to live through which he has continually reinvented and adapted himself remains tight-lipped about some of his other election choices. life to the fullest. in over nine decades of life. The 1940s through the 1980s were not easy decades for The hospital, Coburn reported, is suffering from an acute deficit Starting in the 1920s, his family lived in England, where Coburn Montanans to be “out” if they were gay, lesbian, bisexual or of male physical therapists to assist him in his rehab. “A significant became the first American to join the English Boy Scouts. After otherwise, thus “Ollie” did his best to meet like-minded others other is out of the question at my tender age”, said Coburn. “I graduating college at age 14 as an engineer, he returned to the unassumingly, given the social climate. would cherish a good sense of humor, reasonably good health United States to pursue a career in radio engineering, station Montana, though, has always had more of a “live and let live” and non-smoking and a moderate use of alcohol…Age would construction, programming and consulting. attitude compared to neighboring states where he has lived, not be of too much concern, but compatibility a must!”

Out Words 10 More layoffs at Focus on the Family Ministry spent more than $500,000 to pass California’s positions were not filled in the layoff, which included Prop. 8 gay marriage ban eliminating some of the ministry’s programs. At the time, Focus employed 1,342 full-time employees. Focus on the Family announced that 202 jobs will “To the extent that we can place them within the be cut companywide — an estimated 20 percent of ministry, we will try to do that,” said then-spokesman its workforce. Initial reports bring the total number Paul Hetrick. “Most of them will not be able to be of remaining employees to around 950. placed.” The cutbacks come just weeks after the group In September 2007, amid a reported $8 million pumped more than half a million dollars into the in budget shortfalls, Focus on the Family laid off successful effort to pass a gay-marriage ban in another 30 employees; 15 more were reassigned California. within the company. Most of the layoffs were from Critics are holding up the layoffs, which come Focus’ constituent response services department just two months after the organization’s last round (i.e. the mailroom). of dismissals, as a sad commentary on the true At the time, Schneeberger, who had replaced priorities of the ministry. Hetrick, said that giving was actually up by $1 million “If I were their membership I would be appalled,” during the fiscal year. However, a very “aggressive” said Mark Lewis, a longtime Colorado Springs budget goal of $150 million did not materialize. activist who helped organize a Proposition 8 In a statement issued this September, marking the protest in Colorado Springs on Saturday. “That end of the ministry’s fiscal year, Chief Operating [Focus on the Family] would spend any money on Officer Glenn Williams weighed in on the additional anything that’s obviously going to get blocked in the layoffs of 46 people. courts is just sad. [Prop. 8] is guaranteed to lose, in “It is certainly heartbreaking that in this case the long run it doesn’t have a chance — it’s just a fulfilling that duty means having to say goodbye to waste of money.” some members of our Focus family, but industry In all, Focus pumped $539,000 in cash and another realities really leave us no alternative,” he note in $83,000 worth of non-monetary support into the his statement. “We are accountable to our donors measure to overturn a California Supreme Court to spend their money in the most cost-effective and ruling that allowed gays and lesbians to marry in productive manner possible.” that state. The group was the seventh-largest donor But Lewis, the Colorado Springs activist, wonders to the effort in the country. The cash contributions whether the families who donate to the nonprofit are equal to the salaries of 19 Coloradans earning ministry, realize where their funds really end up. the 2008 per capita income of $29,133. “Seriously, I would imagine their supporters have In addition Elsa Prince, the auto parts heiress and got to be asking the question about whether their longtime funder of conservative social causes who church is really practicing their theology.” sits on the Focus on the Family board, contributed For Lewis, who is straight, the issue boils down another $450,000 to Prop. 8. to the significance of targeting a class of citizens for “They should do more with their half-million exclusion, at the expense of the families that the dollars than spending it to collect signatures to ministry could be helping — in this case their own take the rights away from a class of people,” said employees. Fred Karger, the founder of the anti-Prop 8 group Lewis likened Proposition 8 to Colorado’s Californians Against Hate. “I think it’s wrong and it’s Amendment 2, the 1992 anti-gay measure that hurtful to so many Americans.” was designed to prohibit gays and lesbians from In addition to promoting socially conservative seeking legal protections. Colorado voters approved issues such opposition to abortion and gay rights, the measure, which was marketed by proponents, and supporting abstinence-only education, the including Focus on the Family, as an effort to prohibit evangelical Christian ministry is a purveyor of gays and lesbians from seeking “special rights.” The Christian books, CDs and DVDs. Two months ago, U.S. Supreme Court stuck down the measure as citing Wal-Mart and online retailers as having cut unconstitutional four years later. into its product market, Focus announced that 46 “You can’t make homosexuals second class citizens employees would be laid off from its distribution — we’ve learned that already,” Lewis said. “People department. Late Friday, Focus spokesman Gary will look back on this and see how absurd it is.” Schneeberger confirmed that more layoffs are in Days before this year’s election, Focus founder James store, but said the ministry will not release details Dobson appeared at a closing rally at Qualcomm until Monday afternoon. Schneeberger hinted that Stadium in San Diego to rally the anti-gay troops. some programs may be eliminated entirely, but Karger of Californians Against Hate, termed the declined to elaborate. rally a “big bust.” Organizers promised that more “We’re going to need to talk to our own family than 70,000 supporters would show up; the final first,” he said. “We need to respect the people who tally was close to 10,000, he said. are affected.” Yet three days later, California voters approved Schneeberger also refused to discuss the funding the measure with 52 percent of the vote. While the priorities that Focus made this fall, including measure will certainly head back to court, California pumping money and in-kind contributions into has become the 31st state in the country to pass Proposition 8. measures that define marriage as being between a This is the third year that Focus has laid off man and woman only. In all, Proposition 8 has proven employees due to budget cuts. In its heyday, the to be the most expensive social issue in the country, ministry, which relocated to Colorado Springs with more than $73 million pumped into the cause from Arcadia, Calif., in 1991, employed more than from both sides. One of the larger contributors to the 1,500 people. Many of those employees worked anti-Prop. 8 efforts was Colorado gay philanthropist in mailroom and line assembly jobs, processing so Tim Gill, who contributed $720,000 to oppose the much incoming and outgoing correspondences measure. that the U.S. Postal Service gave Focus its own ZIP “I’m very disturbed by organizations from out of code. state like Focus on the Family,” Karger said. “They In September 2005, nearly 80 employees were came in early to make sure the measure got on reassigned or laid off in an effort to trim millions of ballot; they’ve got muscle and they are out to hurt a dollars from its 2006 budget. In addition, 83 open lot of people and destroy a lot of lives.”

Out Words 11 A Sacred Conversation on Race By ©Rev. Lois E. Van Leer absolutely necessary if our nation is to find genuine healing of its American blacks, but apparently the rule is unique in that it is Special to Out Words past and present sins. Not only is the health of our nation is at found only in the United States and not in any other nation in Delivered on November 16, 2008 at the Unitarian Universalist stake, but also truth-telling and racial reconciliation are crucial the world. In fact, definitions of who is black vary quite sharply Fellowship of Bozeman to our spiritual, physical, and emotional wholeness… from country to country, and for this reason people in other There may be those who would object to these conversations, countries often express consternation about our definition.” who would cry ‘peace, peace,’ when there is no peace – and who As the following unattributed quote says: “The United States is The following is an excerpt from a letter written to President would insist that the civil rights movement leveled the playing the only country in the world in which a white mother can have Elect Obama from the writer Alice Walker: field years ago or would contend that we now live in a ‘post- a black child but a black mother cannot have a white child.” And “You have no idea, really, of how profound this moment is for race’ society. This reasoning denies the deep racial divisions so, if my nephew and niece by marriage are able to conceive, their us. Us being the black people of the Southern United States. that still exist in our country and trivializes the pervasiveness child will be identified on legal forms as African –American or You think you know, because you are thoughtful, and you have of contemporary racism. If we fail to acknowledge honestly bi-racial but never as white. Race is not only socially constructed; studied our history. But seeing you deliver the torch so many these racial tensions or to examine their underlying causes, it is a tool for enforcing white superiority and anything else as others before you carried, year after year, decade after decade, the anger, backlash, and misunderstanding that are resident in less than. century after century, only to be struck down before igniting the our communities will only go underground and fester. We will The handout that the UCC has to help folks begin to engage flame of justice and of law, is almost more than the heart can continue to be susceptible to the tactics of those who wish to in the sacred conversation around race, talks about four “realms bear. And yet, this observation is not intended to burden you, for keep us racially divided and distracted from addressing the issues in which racism is manifest: personal, interpersonal, institutional, you are of a different time, and, indeed, because of all the relay we share in common.” and cultural.” They are all bound up together and are hard to runners before you, North America is a different place. It is really I have longed for this sacred conversation for years. I have separate out. The personal realm encompasses “our values, only to say: Well done. We knew, through all the generations, that attended workshop after workshop on racism and anti- beliefs, attitudes, and feelings. Racism is expressed in this realm as you were with us, in us, the best of the spirit of Africa and of the oppression, always leaving dissatisfied because the conversation “fear of difference, prejudice, and stereotypes.” The interpersonal Americas. Knowing this, that you would actually appear, someday, was always a beginning, a 101. How many times can you start realm differs from the personal in that individuals act on these was part of our strength. Seeing you take your rightful place, the conversation? A conversation that is never finished but can fears, prejudices and fears. They can be acted on or expressed based solely on your wisdom, stamina and character, is a balm for at least go to the next level of depth and exploration. You see, as “discrimination, condescension, verbal or physical violence.” the weary warriors of hope, previously only sung about.” I want to talk about more than analysis and politically correct Institutional racism is formalized by the adoption of “policies, The profound effect of a electing a black man to be president responses born out of guilt and shame. Guilt can be played like practices, rules or procedures which function intentionally or of this country is still sending ripples far and wide. When you a fiddle. And shame, well shame can shut any one of us down. I unintentionally to grant privileges to Whites.” The cultural realm read the words of Alice Walker or see the tears that streamed want a safe place for everyone to speak of their experiences refers to “what groups value as right, true and normal” as the down the Rev. Jesse Jackson’s face and scores of other folks of race and difference. To talk about fears and realities. To put standard against which everything else is measured or judged. of all colors election night 2008, it begins to sink in. In Judith their stories of hurt and confusion out on the table. To allow Though many of us may harbor no personal or interpersonal Warner’s NY Times opinion piece “Tears to Remember” she the anger and misunderstanding to surface. In short, I want the racism, because of the culture we live in and the institutions makes reference to a photo that ran in the Times the Wednesday conversation to go deeper. And I want it to begin in congregations that support that culture, we are beneficiaries of a racist system after the election. The photo was taken in the First Corinthian because I think our covenanting with one another to be in right which champions or favors White skin color. Now I know that Baptists Church in Harlem on election night. It shows a mother relationship, sets a much-needed context for such a difficult there are those of you who have grown up in communities crying on the floor leaning against a pew. Her young daughter conversation. where cultures and colors have existed uneasily side by side. has placed her hand upon her mother’s cheek in a gesture of Recently I wrote to my colleague the Rev. Alicia Forde who is In communities where there was not just tension but outright comfort. In speaking about the young girl, Judith Warner says “To the Coordinator for Multicultural Congregations in the office of hostility to you who because of your Whiteness. You are tired me, she looks like the future, reaching out to heal the past.” How Identity-Based Ministries in the UUA. I asked her if there was a of the politically correct ideologies because they do not match many years have been overcome by the results of one election designation for congregations who have done work on issues of your own experience. You do not idolize a way of life or a people. on one night last week? racism similar to the designation of “Welcoming Congregation” But here is where all of us get into trouble: when we take those for a congregation that has done particular work around experiences and generalize them to an entire race or group of Dream Deferred by Langston Hughes: GLBTQI issues. And, I asked her, if there is not, is it because the persons who are different from ourselves. No one in this sacred “What happens to a dream deferred? work around multiracial multicultural issues is never done or conversation is trying to take away your experience. It, too, Does it dry up completed but always being worked on? No, we do not have needs to be honored. But when we take our experience with Like a raisin in the sun? such a designation she replied and to my second question she an individual or individuals who are representative of another Or fester like a sore-- simply responded “yep.” “race” and see all other persons of that same race in the same And then run? Have you heard that expression that “the most segregated hour way, good or bad, then we perpetuate stereotypes that reduce Does it stink like rotten meat? in America is Sunday morning?” Did you know that 90 percent of a person’s humanity. Or crust and sugar over-- us worship with persons who look just like us in terms of skin What’s the goal of a sacred conversation? Well, I think there like a syrupy sweet? color? How long can a dream go deferred? And when will we are many: honesty, understanding, a reaching across the lines that Maybe it just sags take up the sacred conversation about race? artificially divide us so well. A defiance of societal norms in favor like a heavy load. Lori has been in e-mail contact with the 17 year old cousin of of what Dr. Martin Luther King called the Beloved community. Or does it explode?” our daughter-in-law. This is a young woman living in Utah . The A movement toward a community that is not threatened by, but day after the election, she heard a student in the lunchroom enhanced by pluralism of many kinds. Where we see each other The dreams of Black Americans, have long been deferred. say, “Someone should just put a gun to his head.” Meaning in our differences and our commonality. They have in fact, exploded in upon themselves reeking havoc, Barack Obama. Our UUFB administrative assistant’s 8-year-old Liberation Theologians like Paulo Freire call this the “ongoing despair and death. An enslavement even without chains or laws came to her and said that there was another kid in his class process of conscientization of learning to perceive social, to support it. “How long, Oh Lord?!” have come the cries and who was talking about killing Obama. I have no doubt that economic and political contradictions and to take action against prayers and petitions of persons of African descent in this nation. those sentiments are being expressed nationwide in private and the oppressive elements of reality.” It also involves a parallel Indeed, how long has it taken to bring this discussion of race in in public. And how many of us have kept to ourselves, or only (continued on next page) America out of the closet and into the living rooms of every quietly spoken our fear, that our president may be assassinated? process of creating new identities for those who are labeled as household in this country? The time for a sacred conversation around race and racism in the oppressed and those who are labeled the oppressor. In the In a pastoral letter written by the leadership of the United this country is long overdue. case of race in America, we would be talking about folks who Church of Christ, a call went out to all of its clergy to preach Now I am sure that Jack Fisher or Larry Carruci or Jeanne have been labeled white, oppressor, and black, oppressed. about race on May 18 of this past year. And to begin to engage in Moe can correct me here, but as I understand it, in both Here’s the process whereby each person develops a unique what they termed “a sacred conversation on race.” The letter and anthropological and biological terms, race refers to a category identity based on their own definitions as opposed to those call were issued on the heels of the Jeremiah Wright controversy. of human being based on physical traits that are passed on ascribed by society. For the oppressed person: Stage one is the Here were the hopes that were laid out in this letter. genetically. But here in the United States, we are operating on happy slave. In this stage, a person is happy in the role society “Racism remains a wound at the heart of our nation, a wound a construction of race that stems from the infamous “one drop has defined for them, usually one of subservience on some level that cannot be wished away or treated carelessly. In this sacred rule.” One drop of black blood or one black ancestor defines a and is terribly threatened by those who question these roles. conversation, we seek to engage one another in a deep and person as Black. Says an online article on the Frontline website: Stage two is emulating the oppressor. In this stage, a person sustained dialogue that may be uncomfortable at times but is “Not only does the one-drop rule apply to no other group than focuses all of his or her energy away from his or her group to

Out Words 12 ally one’s self with the oppressor group. Sarah Palin comes to jurisdictions that recognize our marriage. This is not a moment mind. The third stage is rage. Rage because of the recognition when you want to have to provide domestic partnership that one’s so called liberation was really based on self-hatred, The long road documentation, much less negotiate with a skeptical or resistant that internalized -ism. The fourth stage is cultural identity: “a gatekeeper. During a trip to California last summer, we figured process of individual and group self-affirmation” wherein a new we were safe in this regard. We also felt the same level of comfort liberated identity is constructed. The last stage and the goal of to equal rights and support we had come to take for granted in Massachusetts. all liberation theologies is community wherein “the discovery of By Ralph Hexter And which our many friends in Connecticut now also feel in new awareness and ability to act together with others to change their home state, as we will when we visit them. both infrastructures and superstructures that deprive people of Special to Out Words, Used with permission But where are we in, and with, California, after Proposition 8? a useable future.” That last quote was from the late Dr. Letty Can we be regarded as married when we are next in California? Russell, former professor of Theology at Yale Divinity School. We bask in the afterglow of an election that was a victory We could have married again there, but it honestly didn’t occur The oppressor’s process differs only in the first two stages. for democracy: This time around, no one disputes that a clear The first stage is what I call happy owner. It all works for me to us to collect another marriage certificate. The point is to be winner emerged. And if Barack Obama’s victory is a landmark in this stage. As a member of the oppressor group, all persons married in a state that supports our marriage. achievement on the long road from slavery to racial equality and every institution and structure work for me. The second Until, that is, we live in a nation that does so from sea to shining stage is the joke stage wherein the member of the oppressor - and I believe it is - no one should imagine that we have undone sea. On that, I take the long view. It was only in the mid-’60s, after group tries to joke around with the oppressed group, borrowing the legacy of three-fifths citizenship, Jim Crow, “separate but all, that such notorious racist institutions as the poll tax and anti- lingo and slang and mannerisms. A kind of appropriation that is equal” and redlining, and have now awakened in some utopia of miscegenation laws were finally cleared away. really meant to keep them in their place while showing that they complete racial justice. Far from it. The road is long, and as far as equal rights, for all, whatever our are really just one of them until they are not. The third stage Yet the mother of all glass ceilings has been broken. Alas, such sexual orientation or gender expression, we are perhaps nearer is also rage because the system is working to separate them ceilings do not vanish the moment they get their first or even the beginning than the end. from others and no one really likes them and they are pretty second and third crack. The shards that remain even after a isolated. So then, they too, must realize a new identity and work ceiling is totally shattered are sharp and cutting. And as one of EDITOR’S NOTE: Ralph Hexter, president of Hampshire College toward community. You can see why this theology, a theology by the first openly gay college presidents, I know something about in Amherst, Mass., is the first college president to be married to the way that Jeremiah Wright is a proponent of, is so threatening. glass ceilings, however much lower and of lesser moment the a same-sex partner. It seeks to break down inequality and move toward an ethic of barrier a small number of us have now broken. cooperation and the end goal of the common good. I’m not alone in observing that although the country has As a nation, we have been given a chance to be released from taken a clear step forward in one area, in at least four states, the millstone that has hung around our collective neck for discrimination against gay and lesbian citizens has been Letter to editor: hundreds of years: racism. We don’t all move through the stages aggressively reasserted. Few expressed surprise that outright of liberation so easily. Some of us never get past any one of them. bans against same-sex marriages passed in Arizona and Florida, I only hope that we do not fall to the temptation to get stuck in or that voters in Arkansas approved a law restricting the right to I was saddened to hear that during the Missoula rally in the rage. The harder work lies in the creation of new identities opposition to California¹s Proposition 8, Unite-HERE! organizer and the work of being a pluralistic community. The faces of those adopt a child to married couples, a status gay and lesbians cannot attain in that state. Mark Anderlich accused Dr. Betsy Bach of hosting a convention on the TV on Nov. 4, the faces that appeared in paper media and at a hotel whose owner contributed money in support of the the Internet from that night and the following day, they are the But California? California, where the state Supreme Court Proposition and whose labor practices Unite-HERE! is protesting. faces of liberation from an old identity of oppression and the earlier this year declared it unconstitutional for same-sex Mr. Anderlich subsequently urged audience members to contact beginnings of a new self-defined identity. They are the faces of couples to be barred from marriage - this a few months before years of grief finally slackened. They are the faces of hope. They the Connecticut Supreme Court did likewise? California, where Dr. Bach, demanding that she move the convention to a new are the faces of realization that things have forever been altered same-sex couples have been tying the knot since June? location. The implication was that Dr. Bach somehow supports when it comes to the issue of race and racism in this country. Sure, the initiative that reverses the California court ruling Proposition 8 or otherwise is unconcerned about the rights I don’t believe in Utopia. I am not sure I even have a sense of passed with “only” 52 percent of the vote, but unless legal of Gay/Lesbian/Bi citizens and workers. As Dr. Bach¹s friend what that Promised Land looks like. But that will not stop me challenges halt it, the state constitution is now amended to and colleague, I can say with certainty that nothing could be from walking toward it through years of desert wandering. And define marriage as between a man and a woman. further from the truth. The situation regarding the convention is all along the way, I will do my best to engage whoever is walking All this has special resonance for my partner and me, “registered complicated, but briefly: beside me in sacred conversation. Will you join me in that walk? domestic partners” in our home state of California when I took Dr. Bach is currently an officer of the National Will you join me in that conversation? up the presidency of Hampshire College in Amherst, Mass. We Communication Association and was responsible for planning moved east in 2005 and had no plans to marry. We didn’t think it the annual convention, to be held at the Manchester Grand would make a difference to our relationship of - at the time - 26 Hyatt in San Diego. Douglas Manchester, a partial owner and years. We had long since established the terms of our partnership. the person for whom the hotel is named, contributed $125,000 Our families fully honored and recognized our commitment to in support of Proposition 8. However, that happened this past one another. Why marry? summer; the contract to hold the convention at his hotel was Yet after the Massachusetts Legislature took its courageous signed in 2001. stand in 2007 and turned back an effort to put a civil right to Dr. Bach and her fellow officers learned of Mr. Manchester¹s popular vote, we were inspired to express solidarity with the donation shortly after it was made. They were appalled but state that first afforded all residents equal marriage rights. To our they also understood that for many reasons including their surprise, we learned what a difference being married did make. fiduciary responsibility to the association and the impossibility New was the deep comfort and support we felt residing in a of relocating a 5500 person convention in a few short months state that recognized our relationship as equal in every regard the convention could not be moved. Instead, they came up with to the relationships of other couples who had publicly declared creative responses to the situation, including efforts to highlight their commitment to one another. GLBTI scholarship and to address the question of civil rights, In April, we had an unwelcome opportunity to experience how communication, and marriage in high profile panels. In other the normality of marriage - the fact that in Massachusetts it’s no words, Dr. Bach and other members of NCA¹s leadership big deal - can be a very big deal indeed. My partner was taken to sought to find ways to promote the rights of workers and the the hospital with a potentially life-threatening condition while I GLBTI community while also meeting their responsibilities to was traveling. their constituency. As a member of NCA, I am grateful for their There was much to be concerned about as I flew back to efforts. Massachusetts, but one thing was easy. When I called the As we work to promote a more just society, I urge us all to stop, hospital and inquired about his condition, I identified myself think, and investigate before we accuse one another of unjust as “Mr. Kollmeier’s husband.” I was immediately put through behaviors. to the nurse who gave me the reassurance I needed. This was particularly comforting at a time of crisis. Of course, we will still have reason to worry if a medical Sara Hayden emergency overtakes us while traveling outside one of the few Missoula, MT Out Words 13 ommunity esources Flathead LGBT State-wide Events LGBT -Friendly AA Bozeman HIV P CHIV P Hot Springs, MontanaGay andBisexual Men’s Gallatin Carroll Collage Gay-Straight Alliance Butte Services AIDS Support Butte Men’s Group Support Bozeman GLBTIQResource Center M University Congregational Church U Transgender Group Support ROutfield Alliance Officer Nicole Pifari Missoula CityHealthDepartment Missoula Aids Council L W K I Gay Men’s Task Force Gay Men’s Chorus KISMIF M mperial iving Forward www.qnewsmontana.com 406-599-3230 Meets monthly-Call Greg at596-2013for more info Call Rickat406-491-1378for information andlocation www.EmbraceDiversity.org www.flatheadvalleyalliance.org •406-758-6707 HELENA, any questionscallNik(406)-868-3602 www.buttebass.org BASS at406-490-6125 office CallRick406-491-1378or Meet 2nd Tuesday ofeachmonthatBlaineCenterBASS Last Monday of the month 406-491-1378 or 406-490-6125 [email protected] www.BozemanRC.org, 406-600-3608,     building. 406-726-3525or406-777-1169 University Ave, entrancedown thestairsatrear ofthe Meetings every Thursday 5:30p.m. at The Ark at538   building.. University Ave, entrancedown thestairsatrear ofthe Meeting every Monday 7-8:30p.m. at The Ark at538 upport GroupSupport eep ItSimple Al-Anon Family Group of 406-741-2810 omyn’s Night ontana issoula [email protected] orcall406-243-2762 attheUniversityand theirsupporters ofMontana. Email A CoalitionofLGBTIfaculty, graduate students, staff 406-829-8075 370-9876 127 N. Higgins Ave., at406- Suite 202-ContactGary Meeting every Monday 7-9p.m. at The Center, 406-243-5922 http://www.uccmsla.org •406-543-6952 405 University Avenue, Missoula Contact Emily Phippsat406-550-3835. (406) 552-6300 (main) 435 RymanStreet •Missoula, MT59802 LGBTI LiaisonOfficerMissoula Police Department 406-258-4745 406-543-4770 Call Andrew Laueat406-327-9445 Meet Wednesday evenings 7-9p.m. 406-543-2224 or406-721-3824 http://www.iscsm.org Call RosalindadelaLunaat406-499-0078orvisit: M ositiveGroup Support - Helena ositiveGroup Support

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Rosary Church,Rosary 521Custerat7:00p.m. month inBOZEMAN. Contact AIDS Outreach at406-551-1016for Location changes. ContactSandyat406-442-0200. [Helena] W Location: Fireside Coffee House1446Euclid Ave, [Helena] W directions andinformation. [Missoula] Group Hot Springs, Montana,Gay a &Bisexual Men’s Support information at406-327-9445. [Missoula] every Wednesday from 7to9p.m., call Andrew Laue, LCSWfor more Living Forward Group: Men 5922 for more information. [Missoula] U [Missoula] to 6:30p.m.. CallRandyat406-726-3525orCelia406-777-1169 K Randy at406-726-3525[Missoula] Gay &Lesbian AA Meeting 406-543-4770. [Missoula] the University Congregational Church, callNancyat HIV+ Monthly Dinner 406-721-5013 or406-541-0163for more information. [Missoula] month priortopotluckattheUniversity Congregational Church, call PFLA Avenue) [Missoula] the University Congregational Church -Fireside Room(405University LGBTI Community P 7 p.m. attheCenter[Missoula] Center Board Meeting details.[Bozeman] P [Bozeman] of eachmonth. CallGreg at406-596-2013for timeandlocation. BozemanGroup HIV/AIDS Support month at7p.m. basement. intheFlatheadCountLibrary [Kalispell] Flathead out: bozemanpflag.com for more information. Bozeman PFLA [Bozeman] third, and fifth Thursday at International Coffeenew people and talkTraders, to old friends 720 Sin 10th an informal Ave. setting. Java 7 p.m., every first, Union Building room 276 at 7 p.m. [Bozeman] QS (406) 245-2029. [Billings] information contact the Client Action Body at [email protected] Night or staff at Client Board Meeting Advisory 7:00 p.m [Billings] the UCCChurch inConference officelocatedat2016 Aldersonat Billings PFLA Billings AIDSpirit Meeting E-mail [email protected][Missoula] MissoulaRd.,2835 Fort Ste. 301, CallJoni orSusieat406-721-1118 Cancer P 1417 13 St. West. Call DuaneGLBT Open NezAA Meeting at 406-861-8478 [Billings] Wednesday ofthemonth7p.m. attheCenter[Missoula] GroupChristian LGBTISupport Questions callJayce 461-1001. [Helena] Helena Men’s Group, YAP at6:00PM [Billings] M oz Affected P eep ItSimple/ Al-Anon Family Group niversity of eetings omen’s P omen’s Coffee andChat A Q G G Missoula/Five Coffee

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For more , starts @ 5:00 PM. The Missoula Gay Men’s Chorus December: is throwing their 4th annual Christmas Cabaret. It’s a Serving the dinner show, and being held in the University Center nd LGBTIQ Monday, Dec 1st: AIDS Outreach 2 Red Ribbon Ballroom this year. No Host bar opens at 5pm. And Community Special Event in BOZEMAN. Local businesses then dinner and the concert start at 6pm. Tickets are Since 1998 participate in offering a Red Ribbon Special to their $45 each (includes dinner - choice of entree - and The customers, with all or part of the proceeds going dessert) or a table of 10 for $400. Western Montana to AIDS Outreach. Please contact Jon Koontz at Community 924-6664 or email [email protected] with Saturday, Dec 6th : MISSOULA. Club Q hosts any questions about participating in the Red Ribbon “Dark Dreams” Techno/Goth Dance Party! Center Special on World AIDS Day, Saturday, Dec 6th: MISSOULA The Imperial Weekly Events Monday, Dec 1st: BILLINGS AIDSpirit will host Sovereign Court of the State of Montana will be a World AIDS Day prayer service featuring songs, hosting a holiday benefit, “Comical Christmas” prayer-reading, and speeches reflecting on the at the Elks Lodge beginning at 10 P.M. There is a Monday global AIDS epidemic. The service will be open to $5.00 cover charge with proceeds from the event 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. - Gay Men’s Chorus Rehearsal all denominations and will be held at 7:00 p.m. at being split between Missoula AIDS Council and the the St. Andrew Presbyterian Church, and a reception Missoula Food Bank. will follow. Sunday, Dec 7th : The BOZEMAN Unitarian/ Tuesday Monday, Dec 1st: BUTTE Pot luck dinner at Universalist Fellowship celebrates World AIDS Mountain View United Methodist Church on the Day, 10 a.m. at 807 Tracy. The celebration will 7 p.m. - Womyn’s Night: A Lesbian Support corner of Montana and Quartz streets in uptown feature HIV Awareness through personal stories Group Butte. Dinner starts at 6 p.m. followed by a time and an invitation to become involved locally. of remembrance for those individuals who have died. Butte AIDS support Services will provide the Sunday, Dec 7th : BOZEMAN 2-5pm, Pilgrim main course of meat and participants are asked to Congregation Church, “Coming out of Guilt and Thursday bring a favorite salad, vegetable or dessert. For Shame”: Greg Smith will be giving a talk for on more information call Rick at 406-491-1378 or visit Sunday afternoon, December 7th, on “Coming out 7 p.m. - Gay Men Together, A safe and affirming buttebass.org or [email protected] Mail inquiries of Guilt and Shame” Mostly centered on gay issues may be sent to Butte AIDS Support Services at P.O. revolving/involving guilt/shame that will be for gay/bi place for gay & bisexual men to meet. Box 382, Butte, Mt 59703 men and any health care professionals (providers, including case managers, medical people, addiction Monday, Dec 1st: MISSOULA professionals, counselors, etc.). There will be a • 12 P.M. – 4 P.M. Free and anonymous HIV break and some discussion after. testing by Missoula AIDS Council in the Refreshments will be provided. University of Montana University Center A great opportunity to deal with Rooms 330 and 331 a topic that is difficult to talk • 6 P.M. Non-denominational World AIDS Day about! Service at the University Congregational Church (401 University Ave) Saturday, Dec 13th: KALISPELL • 6:45 P.M. Candlelight walk to UC Theater at Christmas Party/gift exchange. the University of Montana Location and time TBA • 7:00 P.M. Showing of “Living with AIDS in rural Montana,” a documentary by UM Saturday, Dec 13th: BUTTE. graduate student, Anne Medley. UC Theater. Christmas Cabaret at Blaine Center 975 N Main. Presented by Thursday, Dec 4th: MISSOULA. Club Q hosts the Imperial Sovereign Court of World AIDS Week Dance! Dancing, billiards, and the the State of Montana. Dancing with premier of the short movie “The Package” @ 11 Butte America Music. No host bar PM! A portion of the door proceeds will be donated by the Helsinki. Proceeds benefit to MAC. Doors open @ 9 PM. Admission: 18+ = $5 Butte AIDS Support Services and the Butte Food Bank. Doors open Friday, Dec 5th: MISSOULA @ 7:30. $7/ Person. For more info • dine out for Life! Participating Restaurants call 406-490-6125. include: Scotty’s Table, Biga Pizza, Higgins Alley, Red Bird, Catalyst, Wheat Montana, Saturday, Dec 13th: MISSOULA. Butterfly Herbs, HuHot, El Diablo, Taco Del Club Q’s 80-08 Holiday Bash! A Sol, Paradise Falls, Jus Chill’n, Hob Nob Café, community fundraiser is being Front Street Pasta and Wraps, and Doc’s planned. Special Guest 80’s Sandwich Shop. When you eat out at any one Cover-Band ‘Mighty Messed-Up’ of the participating restaurants a portion of to perform. DJ Nero spins the your bill will benefit Missoula AIDS Council. 80’s Icons & the best of 2008! • 6:30 P.M. free hot chocolate, raffle tickets and Details TBA artistic condom machines on display for First Friday in the lobby of 127 N. Higgins. Wednesday, Dec 31st: • 11:00 P.M. Special After-Hours party at KALISPELL New Years Eve Dance. Scotty’s Table (Park Level at the Wilma). At the Elks Lodge. Admission is Music, wine, appetizers and raffle. Proceeds $5. Doors open at 8:00 PM. benefit Missoula AIDS Council. Wednesday, Dec 31st: Saturday, Dec 6th : MISSOULA 4th annual Christmas MISSOULA. Club Q New Years Cabaret @ the University Center Ballroom. Event Eve Bash! Details TBA In honor of World AIDS Day

Dine at these participating restaurants on Friday, Dec. 5, and a portion of your bill benefits Missoula AIDS Council

HuHot w El Diablo w The Catalyst w Jus Chilln’ in Southgate Mall w Hob Nob Cafe w Taco Del Sol w Biga pizza w Doc’s Sandwich Shop w Higgins Alley w Wheat Montana w Paradise Falls w Butterfly Herbs w Scotty’s Table w Front Street Pasta and Wraps w Red Bird Restaurant and Wine Bar join us for a special after-hours party

at Scotty’s Table at 11 p.m. Serving the LGBTIQ Community Park Level at the Wilma The Since 1998 Western Montana All proceeds benefit mac CommunityCenter