Managing Coed Soccer: Gender, Power, and Participation Mary Katherine Flanagan

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2013 Managing Coed Soccer: Gender, Power, and Participation Mary Katherine Flanagan

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COLLEGE OF EDUCATION

MANAGING COED SOCCER:

GENDER, POWER, AND PARTICIPATION

MARY KATHERINE FLANAGAN

A Dissertation submitted to the Department of Sport Management in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Education

Degree Awarded: Spring Semester, 2013

Mary Katherine Flanagan defended this dissertation on February 18, 2013.

The members of the supervisory committee were:

Michael D. Giardina Professor Directing Dissertation

Donna M. Nudd University Representative

Joshua I. Newman Committee Member

Jeffrey D. James Committee Member

The Graduate School has verified and approved the above-named committee members, and certifies that the dissertation has been approved in accordance with university requirements.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

The foundation for this dissertation started about 25 years ago on the fields of Nafziger Park in Columbus, Ohio. While I was the sole female on my coed soccer team, I was also the coach's daughter. My dad coached me and both of my brothers in our early soccer years. He passed along his excitement for the game and for all sports to each of his children, who as adults, all continue to play soccer. My own 'soccer mom's' example of what it looks like to be a female adult athlete serves as an inspiration for me today. She worked, raised children, and still made time for her own sporting pursuits. I am grateful for that example and for the genuine passion and interest in sports my family cultivated which has spurred my career path and research interests. Like many athletes, coaches often play an instrumental role in players' lives. For me, that special coach was Rich Mayo. Mr. Mayo not only coached me on the field, but in the classroom, and in life. Through his lectures on politics, social justice, and current events, he encouraged his students to be active citizens – to vote, protest, and serve. Mr. Mayo passed away my senior year in high school and I have no doubt his spirit has urged me to keep playing and to remain aware of the social and cultural lessons available for us to learn daily. When I was discerning the pursuit of a doctoral degree, I sought the counsel of two important people: Dr. Cheryl Beeler and Steve MacNamara, J.D. Both played a large role in my undergraduate and graduate studies. Each has made a career out of mentoring their own students at the college and graduate level. Cheryl and Steve both highly recommended professor-hood and suggested I apply to FSU's Sport Management Program. My first contact with the doctoral program was Dr. Jeffrey James. Dr. James patiently answered all of my questions. His support thus far in the program has given me confidence and reassurance when traversing the challenging doctoral curricula. Under Dr. James's leadership the program has developed a highly respected reputation in the field. It is a program I am honored to be a part of. During my first year as full-time doctoral student, Dr. Michael Giardina joined FSU's Sport Management Department. From our initial meetings, I knew he was who I wanted to work with. It was Dr. Giardina that helped me understand how social justice, human rights, and sport naturally 'fit' together in the world and in research. iii

Dr. Josh Newman's energy, intellect, and authenticity were evident in his first presentation at FSU. When I learned he would be coming on faculty at FSU, I couldn't believe that I was going to have the opportunity to train with two scholars like Newman and Giardina. Together they have taught me to question surfaces, advocate, and take action with my research. Their encouragement, time, revisions, and tough questions have not only made me a better researcher, but a better teacher, and citizen. FSU's sport management program allows for students to take classes outside the department. That is where I met Dr. Donna Nudd. In Dr. D’s Gender and Communication course, rarely a class period went by that I didn't learn something completely new about the social world and which often left me wrestling for days with the ideas, scenes, or discussions that I was exposed to in class. Dr. Nudd shared her own personal experiences as a female professor, which just added fuel to my fire for equality and social justice. Central to this project are the women of SCSA. I would like to thank them for sharing their experiences and insights with me. After each interview and focus group I was filled with excitement and gratitude. I loved getting to know each of them personally and learning about the role soccer had played in their lives. Finally, I want to thank my “teammate,” Eric. He agreed to marry me in the midst of a doctoral program and has been as patient and encouraging as I could ask for. His passion for, reading about, watching, and playing sports often compliments my coursework and helps to ignite research interests. As the captain of my SCSA coed team, Eric's enthusiasm for soccer and specifically our team is infectious; his attitude of inclusion and respect serves as an example of what it looks like to cultivate an accepting and fun sport space.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

LIST OF ABBREVIATIONS ...... vii

ABSTRACT ...... viii

1. INTRODUCTION ...... 1 My History: Soccer Player, Sister, Daughter ...... 1 Why Soccer? Why Adult Women? Why now? ...... 7 Research Questions ...... 12 Limitations ...... 12 Chapters in the Dissertation ...... 13

2. REVIEW OF LITERATURE ...... 20 Socio-cultural History of Women's Soccer in the United States ...... 20 Theorizing Gender and Soccer ...... 35 Toward a Feminist Physical Cultural Studies ...... 58

3. METHODS ...... 84 Epistemological, Ontological, and Axiological Foundations ...... 85 Critical Ethnography, Self-reflexivity, and Ethics ...... 88 Gathering Empirical Material ...... 98 Combining Theory and Methodology ...... 106

4. REFLECTING ON WOMEN’S SOCCER PARTICIPATION IN SOUTH CITY ...... 108 Setting the Soccer (and Scholarly) Scene ...... 108 Interpreting South City Soccer History ...... 112

5. NEGOTIATING GENDERED SPORT SPACE ...... 130 A Note about Method ...... 132 Why (not) Play? ...... 134 Negotiating Gender in Coed Soccer ...... 151 Moving Forward ...... 167

6. NEGOTIATING (MY) GENDER, POWER, AND PARTICIPATION ...... 170 Introduction ...... 170 Discursive Practices, Contested Corporealities, Sporting Externalities: ...... 172 Soccer Player, Feminist, Researcher ...... 172 The Physical and the Virtual: Researcher, Friend ...... 177 Safe Spaces and Inclusive Practices: Soccer Player, Researcher ...... 184 Conclusion ...... 188

7. CONCLUSION ...... 190 Introduction ...... 190 In the Beginning… ...... 190 v

Some Answers, More Understanding ...... 192 Taking Action ...... 194 Recommendations and Advice ...... 195

APPENDIX A ...... 201

APPENDIX B ...... 203

REFERENCES ...... 205

BIOGRAPHICAL SKETCH ...... 229

LIST OF ABBREVIATIONS

AIAW Association for Intercollegiate Athletics for Women AYSO American Youth Soccer Organization BASE buildings, antennas, spans, and earth CCCS Centre for Contemporary Cultural Studies FIFA Fédération Internationale de Football Association FPCS Feminist Physical Cultural Studies HEW Department of Health, Education, and Welfare IAAF International Amateur Athletic Federation IOC International Olympic Committee NCAA National Collegiate Athletic Association PCS Physical Cultural Studies RW Runner’s World Magazine SCSA South City Soccer Association UNC University of North Carolina WPS Women's Professional Soccer WUSA Women's United Soccer Association WSF Women’s Sports Foundation

vii

ABSTRACT

Soccer (also referred to as futbol or football) is considered the world's most popular sport. (Dunning, 1999; Economist, 2005; Mueller, Guttmann, 1993; Cantu & Vancamp, 1996). Across the globe, over 400 million men, women and children watch and play soccer in over 200 countries (Jensen, 2011). Even in the United States, where the professional game is often marginalized, youth soccer records equally high participation rates for both boys and girls (Sabo, 2008). Although participation in soccer generally decreases with age at a higher rate relative to other team sports, the trend is slower among women (National Sporting Goods Association, 2011), which some scholars have referred to as the ‘feminization of soccer’ (Andrews, 1997; Sugden, 1994). Cultural milestones such as the institution of Title IX in 1972, the short-lived Women’s United Soccer Association and Women’s Professional Soccer leagues, and the increased visibility of the Women’s World Cup have contributed to this phenomenon. While there is ample research on cultural discourses relating to class, gender and ideologies that are reproduced on and around the youth soccer field (Swanson, 2009), and likewise on forms of social capital, disciplined bodies, work ethic and middle-class family values that are embodied therein (Andrews, 1997; Swanson, 2009), there is less research surrounding adult participation in soccer and the cultural representations it enacts, embodies, and reproduces. At the adult level, coed recreational soccer leagues are a relatively recent trend (Henry & Comeaux, 1999). In comparison to youth and even adolescent soccer leagues, among adult soccer players there is typically a larger imbalance in the number of men and women participating (National Sporting Goods Association, 2001). According to the United States Adult Soccer Association (USASA), the national governing board for adult soccer leagues, of the organizations 251,000 members approximately 25 percent are women (S. Schroedl, personal communication, January 5, 2013).This statistic suggests lower participation rates in soccer among adult women as opposed to adult men on a macro scale. On a micro scale, this is the case 1 for the South City Soccer Association (SCSA) – an adult recreational soccer league located in a midsize southeastern town in the United States. SCSA is the case on which this study is focused.

1 This name is a pseudonym for the program. viii

To best understand the current state of coed adult recreational soccer and the state of SCSA, it is important to begin with a contextual background of adult recreational soccer on the national level in general and also one specific to the league’s 30-year history. Employing qualitative methodologies in the form of participant-observation, interviews with past and present players, and self-reflexivity, I explore the socio-cultural challenges of ‘managing’ coed soccer. Expanding upon the work of Henry and Comeaux (1999), I deconstruct a widely accepted system of coed soccer. With a focus on gender, power relations, and barriers to participation, I investigate underlying cultural themes such as the social construction of space, identities, and practices. My study follows Giardina and Newman (2011), who call for a form of Physical Cultural Studies (PCS) in which the researcher physically immerses herself in the field and collaborates with participants to produce a rich account filled with multiple voices and perspectives. I build upon PCS with a feminist version, one that is grounded in a feminist standpoint epistemology. As an adult female soccer player-researcher in the league, I incorporate self-reflexivity (Carrington, 2008) in an effort to unearth the silent but powerful systems at work in this space of physicality. My project attempts to understand why adult women are underrepresented in the adult league and assist sport managers of such leagues in increasing its female membership.

CHAPTER 1

INTRODUCTION

Mystory: Soccer Player, Daughter, Sister

The day the child realizes that all adults are imperfect, (s)he becomes an adolescent; the day (s)he forgives them, (s)he becomes an adult; the day (s)he forgives (her)self, (s)he becomes wise. - Alden Nowlan

It is only because of problems that we grow mentally and spiritually. - M. Scott Peck

During my ten-minute drive to the soccer complex each Sunday, I often fulfill my weekly daughterly duty—a check-in with dad via phone. The call often ends a game of phone tag and voicemails about the weekend’s activities – a round of golf, bocce tournament, college football, or a local road race. Whether it’s pre or post-game, he asks “how’s the team looking this season? Who did (are) you play(ing)? Did you win?” And then we each add respective weather updates. These are safe topics of conversation born out of a complicated history of sport, family, and more often than not unsafe spaces. Growing up between two brothers and sport consumptive father, I clearly remember being told, “Soccer players do not play with Barbies.” That was in kindergarten. And while dolls never made it back on my Christmas list, I secretly cherished the times I went over to my cousin’s house and she agreed to play with her collection of Barbies; she had blonde ones, brunettes, even Ken and Skipper, along with their plastic pink convertible. At my Barbie-less home, I was the goalie in our half grass/half mud backyard/soccer field; the sidelines were a partially-painted fence and a leaning brick wall; both structures begged for TLC, but the aesthetics of our backyard were not among our parents’ priorities. The goals were the wooden frame of an abandoned childhood swing set and the edge of a cracked concrete patio. My older brother drilled penalty kicks with me in goal, assuring me that his PK practices were helping me to be a better soccer player, toughening me up. I believed him and when I carried on that tradition with my younger brother – he believed me too. Consequently, both mine and my younger brother’s soccer careers involved stints as goalies… my older brother never played in goal.

The three of us grew up in a middle class neighborhood, one block from our Catholic elementary school. We lived in a safe neighborhood – physically and socially. Inside our home we were also safe physically and socially – but at certain times, we felt less secure. Among what some may consider “adult” issues, as children, my brothers and I were very aware of our family’s financial situation which resembled a steep water slide more often than a steady lazy river. Our parents’ tumultuous bank accounts were talked about (or rather loudly discussed) routinely. I did not think this was out of the ordinary and assumed that family meetings about the mortgage payment were the norm. Our family’s financial instability was a result of many things. Among those things, however, materialism was not a cause. Growing up in large Catholic families, (my mom one of nine and my dad one of eight) possessing many shiny new things was not something they were familiar with or even strived to obtain. While material things were never a huge deal – our version of “keeping up with the Joneses’” manifested in sport. Whether we had the money or not, my father enrolled us in the best sport camps. We played in as many leagues as possible and each 2 of us “tried out” for and “made” elite travel teams. Before and after practices, games, and tournaments, I was reminded of the financial strain my involvement in soccer contributed to my family’s monetary trials. But as a child – during the practices, games, tournaments, I felt safe – physically and socially. The financial strife that these endeavors caused within my family seemed worthy in the name of sport. Soccer was a ‘good thing;’ therefore, spending money on it was a good thing. It was an investment into our future, character, and physical health. Twenty-five years later my brothers and I are all healthy and of good character—but most likely remember the family fights about finances more vividly than any skill we learned at soccer camp or trophy won at a weekend cup. As adults, my brothers and I all still play soccer in different leagues. Soccer is not a regular part of our conversations but more of a quiet connection, a muted understanding among us. We never became the superstars we had aspired; collectively though, I think we each

2 In hindsight and informed by the concept of the commodification of youth sport, I see now that when we “made teams” it was less about our skill or talent and more about the amount of money and time we (our parents) were willing to commit to youth soccer. These teams were a large financial investment consented to and influenced by a hegemonic promise, that participation in elite youth sport is the way to breed a soccer prodigy, a scholarship earning athlete, an all-American kid/teen, and consequently a good sport consuming citizen (Giardina and Metz, 2005). While my brothers and I may have fallen short of prodigy status or earning any type of athletic scholarship we all became “successful” consumers of sport. 2 genuinely wished one another would excel in the hopes of rationalizing the financial and emotional rollercoaster of our youth. But even then, our support for one another was less pronounced; words of encouragement were not voiced. Though, for Christmas, my older brother 3 gave me a Mia Hamm poster, which hung in my room through middle and high school. During the same time, I remember being on the edge of my seat waiting to hear if my brothers had made their respective teams or earned a starting position. I wanted so badly for both of them to succeed – for the ‘investment’ to be worth it. Through high school and even college – soccer was more than a sport structure. I had a 4 complicated relationship with soccer. It was my sport. I was supposed to be good at it. And at times I was; I was recruited by the coach of a local public high school, but ultimately chose to continue Catholic education (another parental capital outlay of the previous nine years) after receiving a full scholarship and confirming my high school tuition payments would not be the subject of anxiety over the next four years. My freshman year in high school marked the 5 beginning of the school’s girls’ soccer program. Our interest and experience with soccer coupled with our parent’s efforts, organization, and desire to give us the opportunity to play made the 6 program possible. My high school coach, Mr. Mayo was a significant part of my soccer experience. With my father in and out our home, Mr. Mayo was constant. Soccer was safe. Mr. Mayo died suddenly of a heart attack in the middle of my senior year in high school. Just a few months earlier, he had awarded me MVP of the season. I received this not because I was the most talented, highest scorer, or best player (my soccer playing status actual slowly declined in high

3 Media representation of soccer-playing women is an important portion this project's examination of the spaces, identities, and practices constructed within and through women's soccer. This is because forms of popular culture such as the media (i.e. posters) are “where we go to discover who we are” (Hall, 1992, p. 32). That Mia Hamm poster represented an ideal I aimed to achieve, and my brothers acknowledged and subtly encouraged. 4 Referring to soccer as “my sport” can be likened to Foucault's theoretical notion of “technologies of the self”—these are devices/techniques which make possible the social construction of personal identity (Foucault, 1988). Technologies of the self may be a certain practice, piece of clothing, even a tattoo – which serves to represent a certain identity. For me, in middle and high school, soccer was a “technology of self.” 5 Prior to this, girls played on the boys’ soccer team. This resembles the plots of two of the four movies about girls and soccer made in the past 20 years. The movies, She’s the Man and Gracie tell stories of high school-age girls that must play on boys’ teams to pursue their soccer careers. 6 The growth of female sport opportunities has largely been credited to Title IX (Acosta & Carpenter, 2012). The passage and implementation of Title IX has largely been credited to fathers of daughters (Lopiano, 2012). These were fathers who wanted their daughters to play sport. Therefore, the organization of high school and youth sport was taken on by parents of girls. This trend was evident in my community, parental involvement and support of a girls’ high school team contributed to the successful implementation. 3 school—likely on account of high school’s externalities – boys, dances, and an emotionally straining home-life). He awarded me MVP, on account of the intrinsic impact he felt that I made on and off the field. It was one of the best compliments I had ever received. I recall collapsing in the school parking lot when I received the news of his death. For the next 24 hours, I remember just waiting for someone to tell me that it was mistake, that he woke up/came back to life; I was convinced God would do that for a man like him, for people like us who were hurting so bad. Like Jesus did for Martha and Mary, He brought Lazarus back to life; He could bring Mr. Mayo back too. For weeks I slept with the MVP plaque next to me in bed. Like many life-altering events—my teammates, our parents, his family—we all looked for signs of why? Why now? Why would such a good man die? He impacted many lives during his life. And so, while Mr. Mayo physically departed from our lives, for many his spirit remained. Then senior year ended and college decisions were made. Mr. Mayo had written me a recommendation to play soccer at John Carroll, a small Jesuit college in Cleveland, Ohio. While the school’s scholarship offer was appealing, I also knew Mr. Mayo would have supported whatever decision I made. The following fall I enrolled at Florida State University. Shortly after arriving in Tallahassee I showed up to try out for the school’s women’s club team. While I 7 ‘made’ the team, I was physically out of my league. Our practices were some of the most difficult and defeating hours of soccer I experienced. During games, I played left bench most of the first season. I am not sure why I kept going back… or even went out for the team in the first place. Was it for Mr. Mayo? Was it to redeem my parents’ sporting investment? Was I still trying to mimic my older brother who also played on his college’s club team? Was I trying to quietly connect with my brothers across miles? Was it a safe place in the new and different college world? Was it all of the above? As an adult, I still play soccer and after wrestling with my college motives – I think the answers to each of those questions are ‘yes.’ Aware of these cultural forces shaping my subjectivities, I occasionally contemplate why I continue to play as an adult: If I stop playing will I disappoint “him” – my dad, my brothers, Mr. Mayo? Or will I disappoint myself? Do other

7 Again here, ‘making teams’ equated to buying into the commodification of sport and embodying sport consumptive citizenship. Both time and money were allocated to the sport club pursuit. 4

8 adult female soccer players struggle with the same questions / indices of identity? Alongside or rather beneath my physical and social lived experiences on the coed soccer pitch, there exists a historically produced present (Carrington, 2009) which I aim to explore with this project. I hope to make sense of the contextually constructed lived experiences of both my social self and my participants. The next vignette turns to my present day soccer experiences as a player in South City Soccer Association’s adult coed league. *** As the sun begins to fall into the horizon, a calm mixture of shadow and light dress the soccer complex. I jog out onto the field and think to myself that there is no other place I would rather be. This is a favorite moment in my week; it often reminds me of my 'glory days' as Bishop Hartley High School's center midfielder. Some evenings my mind takes a short detour down memory lane; layers of emotion flow through me as I reminisce about my time as a Hartley Hawk. I recall the security of being part of a team and comfort in knowing my role, my position, my duties on the field. I remember rivalries, victories, and season-ending losses. An air of competitive angst still hovers, just enough that it propels me to play focused, like an athlete. Oftentimes, that daydream is cut short by the official's whistle signaling kick-off. On this particular occasion, my reminiscent state is disrupted by the center referee's exchange with a female on the opposing team. The player is informing the ref that she is injured and needs to sit out, which will leave her team with only one female player (one less than required). The referee approves, then signals for the attention of our team captain (my husband)—informing him that he is permitted to field only one female. The captain replies, “No, problem, we'll keep two females on the field.” The center referee looks confused and responds, “Whatever you say—but that is to your disadvantage.” I am within earshot of this dialogue and without thinking, my gut ejects a disgusted response, “Did you just say that out loud?” My heart pumps full throttle with shock and even rage; my male teammates hear this comment and support

8 These haunting questions can be attributed in part to Leslie Heywood’s (2007) critical analysis of girl-focused sport programs such the Women’s Sports Foundations, GoGirlGo! Heywood reads the campaign’s marketing materials through the lens presented by Hardt and Negri (2000) in Empire. She sees “girls as the ideal subjects of Empire, part of the new global economy that relies on individuals who are trained to blame their inevitable ‘failures’ on themselves rather than the system their lives are structured within” (Heywood, 2007, p.104). Heywood sees the WSF as suggesting that girls can control their own destiny through participation in sport. If they do not play sport, they do not succeed and they are responsible for those failures. For me this analysis resonates; that is, I continue to play soccer as an adult not because it is my favorite thing to do, way to spend time, or physical activity (though I do enjoy it on some levels) but because it is what I should do. Subconsciously, I equate playing soccer with success and not playing with some version of failure. 5 my sentiment with their own looks of shock and disgust. The ref then responds, “Well you all aren't stupid.” Translation: The team with fewer females on the field will win the game. This exchange occurred in the midst of a 10-game coed soccer season within an adult recreational soccer league. The league has been in existence for about 25 years and while the soccer is strong, the 'coed' idea struggles. Recently the league has seen the number of women coming out to play dwindle. I am aware of this on account of my own observation and conversations with past and present female members as well as board members who recognize this shortage and often opine over ways to improve the ratio. So my immediate response, “Did you really just say that out loud?”—while instinctive—was informed by my historical understanding and interpretation of the lack of women on the field and barriers to participation in this hyper-masculine space (see Connell, 1987). As a woman in the league, I continually negotiate the performance of my gendered identity on the pitch: I am an adult female sporting body, proud of her ability to play and of her sustained commitment to the sport; a former high school player reliving/extending her youth; a body in motion enjoying the stretch of the legs and pump of the heart; a teammate experiencing camaraderie and competition; a wife of a team captain and board member; and a friend/sister/ daughter figure to the other men and women on the team. On this particular evening—in this particular moment—each of these identities are on stage. At different moments—and sometimes simultaneously—my performance is unconsciously driven by each of these subjectivities. After the short exchange of heated words, I could feel my heart beat in my stomach; I struggled to focus on the game—as I ran up and down the field thoughts raced through my head: “I cannot believe he just said that. How sexist! How ignorant! And they wonder why women don't come out to play, I don't blame them. Darn it.” A few minutes later, a loose ball comes my way; typically, I do not go 100 percent for a 50/50 ball. This is because often the other '50' is a 180-pound man and, quite frankly, I like my legs—I don't need one broken or for that matter even scraped up—and I enjoy wearing skirts sans scabbed knees. But this night was different. I went 100 percent; my male counterpart was likely not expecting that: As we both met the ball our bodies collided and he bounced off me falling over to one side. I was standing with the ball at my feet and with composure I hit a through ball to my center forward who buried it into the back of the net. The team celebrated our score—I got high fives and 'atta girls' as I came off the field along with comments such as—“so that's how you play when you're mad.” An enthusiastic 6 pat on my back came from the team captain (my husband), followed by the comment, “Wherever that came from – hang on to it.” But I didn't want to hang on to it; I wanted to do something about it. *** Personal experiences and internal dialogue such as the ones described above were among the impetuses for this exploration of gender, sport, and space. Throughout the past 25 years, soccer has played a large role in my life; in schoolyards and backyards, under the lights, and on Sunday afternoons. As a player, coach, and spectator, I have learned life lessons, matured, and “toughened up” (as my dad would say) on and around the soccer pitch. Like most institutional structures though, soccer and soccer leagues are not without flaws. A league and, more tangibly, a soccer field, can marginalize and even oppress innocent bodies. Scholars addressing sport specifically have referred to spaces such as the soccer field as a masculine domain and point to hyper-masculine articulations in that space that often create a contentious environment for females to negotiate (Connell, 1987). Merely entering such a space can be daunting or even impossible. I have experienced both positive and negative aspects of the game throughout the years and at times, simultaneously. Currently, I enjoy my weekly soccer matches but not without apprehension and sometimes anxiety. It is a coed league and as female I must negotiate my gendered body in the social space. The number of men out to play exceeds the women by about a 5:1 ratio in SCSA. But this has not always been the case. Through casual conversations with women approximately 30 years my senior, I have learned that in the late 1980s and 1990s, there were scores of women participating in adult recreational soccer in South City (the city of interest in this project). As they shared stories of the “good 'ole days,” I wondered why their experiences seem so different than mine, 20 years later. Is it the nostalgia of the past? The different cultures of each era? The culture of the league? Is it just me? I wanted to find the answer to some of these questions. The following project situates these intimate, reflective questions alongside a socio-cultural analysis of soccer and its gendered sporting spaces.

Why Soccer? Why Adult Women? Why now?

Soccer (referred to as fútbol or football outside the United States) is considered the world's most popular sport (Dunning, 1999; Economist, 2005; Guttmann, 1993; Mueller, Cantu

& Vancamp, 1996). Across the globe, over 400 million men, women, and children watch and play soccer in over 200 countries (Jensen, 2011). Even in the United States, where the professional game is often marginalized, youth soccer records high participation rates for both boys and girls (Sabo, 2008). Nearly 14 million children in America play soccer; 40 percent of them are girls (President’s Council on Fitness, Sports, and Nutrition, 2010). The number of girls participating in soccer is greater than the overall average of sport participation among girls. According to a 2008 survey by the National Council of Youth Sports (NCYS), “more than 44 million children participated in some form of youth sports in the United States. When looking at the gender of youth sports participants, the NCYS found that 66 percent were boys and 34 percent were girls.” Among the most popular interscholastic sports, soccer ranks fifth for girls and boys (National Federation of State High School Associations, 2005). Participation in soccer, however, generally decreases with age; of the 18 million Americans who play soccer, 78 percent are under the age of eighteen (U.S. Embassy, 2009). The decline in participation occurs at a higher rate relative to other team sports, although soccer is still among the most popular sport for females in high school and college (National Sporting Goods Association, 2011). Some scholars have referred to this trend as the ‘feminization of soccer’ (Andrews, 1997; Sugden, 1994). Cultural milestones such as the enactment of Title IX in 1972, the second wave of the feminist movement through the 1970s and early 1980s, the increased visibility of the Women’s World Cup, and the short-lived and well-hyped women’s professional soccer leagues (Women’s United Soccer Association and Women’s Professional Soccer) have contributed to this phenomenon. In 1999, FIFA (Fédération Internationale de Football Association) President, Sepp Blatter, declared, “the future of soccer is feminine.” The prophetic remark was made in anticipation of the 1999 Women’s World Cup hosted by the United States and recognized as the largest and most watched women’s sporting event of all time (Litterer, 2011). The statement was made during a time when the effects of the implementation of Title IX were being demonstrated with a dramatic increase in female sport participation. The category of sports deemed culturally appropriate for females once limited to gymnastics, figure skating, and synchronized swimming (MacDowell & Schaffner, 2011) expanded to include soccer.

Currently, female participation in soccer at the youth, high school, and collegiate level is higher than most other sports, but this has not always been the case. Twenty years ago, 31.8 percent of National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA) Division 1 schools offered women’s sport. Today approximately 93 percent of NCAA Division 1 schools offer women’s soccer (Acosta & Carpentar, 2012). At the high school level soccer is ranked as the fifth most popular sport among females with 356,116 participants. It is more popular than cross country, tennis, swimming and diving, competitive spirit squads, and golf (U.S. Census Bureau, 2012a). At the collegiate level, soccer ranks third in female participation. It is ranked behind basketball (ranked No. 1) and volleyball (ranked No. 2); but both women’s college basketball and volleyball has seen a decrease in participation from 2010 – 2012, whereas women’s college soccer participation rates have seen a 2.2% increase (Acosta & Carpenter, 2012). Sports such as cross-country, softball, tennis, track and field, golf, swimming and diving all have lower participation rates than women’s collegiate soccer. A longitudinal study of NCAA schools compiled by Acosta and Carpenter (2012) found an interesting trend:

In 1977, soccer was the 20th most popular women’s sport, found in only 2.8 percent of schools. Today, women’s soccer is in third place, found in 93.4 percent of all NCAA schools. Over time, soccer has been consistently the sport with the strongest growth (Acosta & Carpenter, 2012, p. 10). This dramatic increase in soccer participation is not evident among adult women. It is important to note, though, that participation rates for adult women have not been as thoroughly documented across sports over the past three decades. A 1992 study tracking adult sport participation was limited to golf, tennis, racquetball, aerobic dance, jogging/running, and weight lifting. These sports were selected for examination because they were considered to represent the key sport and fitness opportunities offered by both public and private sector providers (Howard, 1992). In 1994, the U.S. reported the ten most popular sports activities among women – soccer was not on the list. In 2005, soccer was the 18th most popular sport among women according to the National Sporting Goods Association (2011) and in 2010 it was ranked at the 19th most popular participatory sport among women. So while female soccer participation surpasses other sports at the youth and collegiate level, female participation rates trail behind many sports (such as softball, tennis, running/jogging, and swimming) among adult women.

Further, when comparing male and female soccer participation rates there is contrasting evidence between sexes as age increases. At the youth level, participation rates are almost equivalent. In high school female participation falls slightly behind males. Among NCAA schools there is a greater number of female athletes. But at the adult level there is a drastic difference between female and male participation (Acosta & Carpenter, 2012; AYSA, 2012; U.S. Census Bureau, 2011). The following table compares male and female soccer participation among four different age groups.

Table 1 Soccer Participation Across Four Age Groups

Age Group Male Female Source

Youth 24,000,000 16,000,000 President’s Council, 2010*

High School 391,839 356,116 NFSHSA, 2010

Collegiate 21,770 23,650 NCAA, 2010

Adult 1,365,000 435,000 Google, 2012*

*approximation

These statistics lead me to question Blatter’s hopeful statement regarding soccer’s ‘feminine future.’ I recognize he was largely referring to an elite level of competition and, to a lesser extent, recreational play. But his sentiment is shared by groups who point to women’s soccer in the United States as an example of “U.S. exceptionalism” (Markovits & Hellerman, 2006) and celebrate the “feminization of soccer.” These groups include organizations such as the Women’s Sports Foundation and the National Association for Women and Girls in Sport. They may consider the large of number girls playing soccer as a success (Acosta & Carpenter, 2012). Girls benefit tremendously from sport; researchers have suggested sport participation contributes to increased confidence levels, communication skills, and physical health (Staurowsky, DeSousa, Ducher, Gentner, Miller, Shakib, Theberge, & Williams, 2009). As we ponder all of these positive reports surrounding girls and adolescence, shouldn’t we be concerned with the decline in 10 sport participation and/or passion for the game of soccer among women? Or, at least, try to understand why this is the case? At the professional level, women’s soccer has struggled to exist. The Women’s United Soccer Association (WUSA) played only three seasons (2001-2003) and the Women’s Professional Soccer league (WPS) suspended operations in 2010 after one season. While professional levels of sport may not directly represent soccer participation among the general adult female population, participation in sport and specifically soccer decreases as females enter adulthood. More importantly, it decreases at a higher rate than its male counterparts (see Table 1, SCSA, 2012; USDHHS 1996). The benefits of participating in sport are many – not just for girls but also for women (McDonagh & Pappano, 2009; Smith, 1999). Physical fitness, socialization, stress release, and camaraderie are among the intrinsic and extrinsic benefits associated with sport participation among both sexes. Adult males are reaping the benefits of sport (specifically soccer) more often than women. A sport many females were once very involved in becomes a footnote of their past. Soccer may have been a large part of a female’s life as a child or throughout high school, but as an adult, she is not involved at all as a participant. Observations and analyses such as these contribute to my interest in adult women and recreational soccer participation. There is ample research on cultural discourses relating to class, gender, and ideologies that are reproduced on and around the youth soccer field (Averill & Power, 1995; O'Donnell, 2004; Swanson, 2009), and likewise on forms of social capital, disciplined bodies, work ethic, and middle-class family values that are embodied therein (Andrews, 1997; Azzarito & Harrison, 2008; Coakley, 2006), but there is less research surrounding adult participation in soccer and the cultural representations it embodies. At the adult level, creation of coed recreational soccer leagues is a relatively recent trend (Henry & Comeaux, 1999). In comparison to youth and even adolescent soccer leagues, adult soccer leagues have a greater imbalance in gender representation: The ratio of men to women is uneven. Nationally, among adults, the ratio of soccer playing men to soccer playing women is approximately 3:1 (Google, 2012). This contrasts with youth recreational soccer where the ratio of boy soccer players to girl soccer players is approximately 3:2 (National Sporting Goods Association, 2011). According to the United States Adult Soccer Association (USASA), the national governing board for adult soccer leagues, of the organizations 251,000 members approximately 25 percent are women (S. Schroedl, personal 11 communication, January 5, 2013). This statistic suggests lower participation rates in soccer 9 among adult women as opposed to adult men on a macro scale. On a micro scale, this is the case for the South City Soccer Association (SCSA) – an adult recreational soccer league located in a midsize southeastern city in the United States. SCSA is the case on which this study is focused. Through this project the following research questions are explored as it relates to SCSA.

Research Questions

 What social and cultural factors contribute to the participation and non-participation of adult females in soccer?  How do adult female soccer players negotiate their gender in a coed soccer space?  In what ways does the operation of the league (governance, bylaws, rules, communication systems) of SCSA enable and contest female participation?

Limitations

This study is limited to the experiences of women involved with South City Soccer Association and those soccer-playing females who do not currently play in SCSA but are aware of the league's existence. The experiences presented are not to be generalized across all adult female soccer players but instead contribute to a better understanding of some aspects of the social world. The project is primarily concerned with gender; therefore, other cultural elements such as social class, race, sexuality, and life stage are not directly explored but emerge at different points across the interviews, focus groups, observations, and reflexive notes. The genealogy of female soccer participation in South City is limited to the oral accounts of the six female pioneers interviewed. This history is not one documented in textbooks or even by previous historians of SCSA. Instead, it was pieced together via the memories of six individuals. Additionally, my interviews are only with women. While men are discussed in the piece, I do not attempt to interpret their experiences in the league. This project seeks to give voice to women and their interpretation of a sport space. My attention is consciously limited to

9 The number of opportunities available for women to play is less than their male counterparts. Although this may contribute to the lower participation rates, I argue the each are simultaneously a cause and effect of one another. For example, in a 2013 nationally advertised Adult Soccer Tournament, of the over 60 teams that participated, 54 were all-men’s, 4 were coed, and 4 were all-women’s (J. Weston, personal communication, February 22, 2013). Further, according to the USASA, there are over 45 all-women’s adult soccer leagues in the United States (N. Schmitt, personal communication, February 19, 2013). These statistics suggest opportunities exist for women to play soccer, although the demand for more opportunities does not. 12 the privileging of women, their view of the world, their intimate thoughts, reactions, and feelings associated with soccer and more specifically coed soccer. I intentionally chose not to include interviews with men in this project. I acknowledge that their experiences and reaction to playing soccer with women is significant and could spur a future project, but for now, I am concerned with the women’s perspectives. Finally, my ethnography was limited to a ten-month period. This is not a longitudinal account of dozens of women's experiences over time. Instead, I present a rich account of the ten- month period as it relates to the experiences of six current participants in the league; six women who were once associated with SCSA’s coed league or soccer in general; and six women who played soccer in the early years of SCSA and women's soccer in South City.

Chapters in the Dissertation

Chapter 2: Literature Review

My review of literature begins with a socio-cultural history of women’s soccer in the United States. It includes the genesis of women's soccer in the U.S., the sport’s development among colleges, and the establishment of a national team. Simultaneously, high school circuits and recreational soccer leagues contributed to the growth at a grass roots level. Each of these elements of history is discussed alongside the social and cultural state of the time. Contributing to the phenomena of women's soccer participation are factors such as federal legislation (i.e. Title IX), presidential initiatives, pop culture, and other ideas about sport, female bodies, and femininity. The general/macro-level history serves as a backdrop to a genealogy of female soccer participation in the local community of South City. The literature review chapter contains previous research in sport sociology, management, and cultural studies as it relates to women's sports participation. Projects addressing both “women's only” and coed sport are presented and read through a feminist theoretical lens. That is, as a researcher, I wrestle with the ways in which the actors (the participants, institutions, and researchers) within the project subtly constrain or limit women's sport participation and the ways that they challenge and enable a woman's pursuit of sport. Reoccurring concepts within the literature on gender and sport are traced over approximately 30 years of academic research. These concepts include sport as a masculine domain, the feminization of sport, and U.S. exceptionalism.

Next, I focus my attention on theory related to space, place, gender and sport. Following Lefebvre (1991), I contend that the production of social spaces can help us understand a space such as those encompassed by coed soccer. Further, the production of those spaces is a product of gender performances. That is, unconscious performances of gender (Butler, 1990) are the building blocks of social spaces. Much has been written on gender performances of female bodies in sporting spaces. I review this literature and then turn my attention specifically to the female bodies in coed sport spaces such South City Soccer Association. Each of the elements of this chapter provides a solid foundation from which to embark methodologically.

Chapter 3: Methods

Employing a qualitative strategy that includes: interviews with past and present female players; participant observation; and content analysis of rules, bylaws and communication systems, I explore the social and cultural elements of coed soccer. Over the course of ten months (two coed soccer seasons consisting of ten games each), I conduct a critical ethnography of South City Soccer Association. I play on one team in the league, observe other matches, talk with my teammates (male and female), officials, and board members, and participate in team/league social activities. This ethnographic approach relies on “firsthand observations . . . which allow the researcher to see how people diverge from the culturally defined, idealized model of behavior” (Peoples & Bailey, 1994, p. 89). Ethnography is a dynamic process; it is not rigid or constraining. Instead, it enables a researcher to gain “knowledge of the social world through a fluid and flexible design that often emerges as the project unfolds” (Hammersley & Atkinson, 1995, p. 11). My project includes semi-structured interviews with women in the league and those previously involved in soccer living in South City. The nature of the interviews allows themes to emerge as directed by the women through our conversations. Through active interviewing, I make an effort to collaborate with the women, co-constructing knowledge (Denzin, 2010; Hoffman, 2009). Following Gaile Cannella and Yvonna Lincoln (2011), I align myself with this marginalized group. An ethnographic approach such as this provides an effective means by which previously ignored voices can now be heard and understood within a context (e.g. in this case women or in other projects, racial and class groupings) (Tedlock, 2000; Silk, 2005). Context

14 and more specifically history are presented through my interviews with the female soccer pioneers in the community. This element of the ethnography involves an axiology that embodies a feminist communitarian model; it puts the community prior to people (Denzin, 2009). That is, it begins by gaining a contextual understanding of a situation and population. Alongside my ethnographic exploration of the “Other,” I “try to come to terms with my own ‘critical subjectivities'” (Denzin & Lincoln, 2000, p. 1057). This critical ethnography makes space for the researcher's subjectivities – intellectually, physically, and culturally. My project follows Michael Giardina and Joshua Newman (2011), who call for of Physical Cultural Studies in which the researcher immerses herself in the field and collaborates with participants to produce a rich account filled with multiple voices and perspectives. Following these scholars, I situate myself in the sport space of a coed soccer league; I am among moving bodies – bodies in their natural state that are simultaneously physical and cultural. It is in these natural states and fields of play that as researchers we can better understand the social world. By observing and interacting with these cultural beings, we can gain social and critical insights on sport. In this sport space, I focus on women as the Other – as a marginalized group. As such, I consider my study to be an example of a feminist Physical Cultural Studies project. Cultural studies “engages society as a concrete, historically produced, fractured totality made up of different types of social relations, practices, and experiences” (Andrews, 2002, p. 114). Additionally, a feminist lens attempts to “identify subtle forms of oppression and imbalance, thus teaching us to address questions about whose interests are regarded as worthy of debate” (Steiner, 1989, p. 158). A feminist cultural studies approach explores the social world with the intention of contributing to a better understanding of the cultural forces at work both enabling and impeding women’s life experiences. With a focus on sport and the social, cultural, and political bodies in sport space, the project becomes physical. Further, my physical immersion in the field crystallizes the feminist Physical Cultural Studies project. As an adult female soccer player-researcher, I not only observe and interact, but equally as important, I reflect on my experience in the league. Alongside descriptive field notes, I record personal reflections. My reactions, biases, assumptions, and judgments are recognized and processed as a part of the analysis. This reflective strategy contributes to the immersive nature of Physical Cultural Studies. Incorporating self-reflexivity (Carrington, 2009; Denzin, 1997) 15 enhances critical ethnography by the way in which it has the ability to unearth silent but powerful systems at work in a space such as coed soccer. My field notes, self-reflexive notes, and interviews attempt to understand why adult women are underrepresented in the adult league and to assist sport managers of such leagues to create a more inclusive sport space.

Chapter 4: Reflecting on Women’s Soccer Participation in South City

To fully understand an issue, problem, or trend, it is advantageous to approach it not merely in isolation but with a historical analysis of the situation and its components. The historical production of bodies, sport, and power relations is crucial to unpacking present day surfaces. Layers beneath the surface can be revealed, problems can be redefined, and solutions can be mutually achieved by locating the body in context within the historical and social production of ideas. According to Lawrence Grossberg (1997), “context is everything, and everything is context” (p.7). That is, multiple discourses – both in the present and the past – create meaning. Ideas, objects, and institutions are constructed over time and in articulation with other cultural entities. Within cultural studies, theoretical understandings turn on historical and contextual analyses. To cultivate a contextual understanding of coed soccer in SCSA, I convene two focus groups with female soccer pioneers in South City. Their stories are told alongside the development of women’s soccer on the national stage (discussed in Chapter 2) and create a genealogy of female soccer participation in South City. Genealogies seek truth by mapping operations of power (Foucault, 1980b). That is, they delve below surface structures to better understand how an organization or entity becomes a widely accepted social structure. A genealogy looks at ideologies, values, and beliefs surrounding a social structure that contributes to its establishment. Societal institutions such as soccer and more specifically a coed soccer league is an example of a social structure. Exploring the events, attitudes, and beliefs surrounding the creation of SCSA contributes to a genealogy of female soccer participation in South City. SCSA’s history and the role systems of power have played in that history can help us better understand present day ideas, attitudes, and beliefs in and around the organization. Through group interviews I share the stories of six women who convey perspectives on the roles that individuals and organizations played in the establishment of adult women's recreational soccer and girls high school soccer. These stories are situated alongside the

16 establishment of the community's adult recreational soccer league known as the South City Soccer Association (SCSA). Initially founded as a men's league, the female soccer pioneers were instrumental in its transition to a coed format. The inclusion of women in the league led to the increase and development of both coed and women-only teams. Twenty years following these strides, there has been a substantial decrease in the number of women participating in the league. Currently, the women's league is non-existent and the coed league struggles to field women. My project attempts to better understand this issue. The lived experiences of key figures in the city's soccer community together with the history of women's soccer on a macro level provide an appropriate backdrop for my inquiry.

Chapter 5: Negotiating Gendered Sport Space

Sporting places are gendered space and spaces such as coed sport space can be both oppressive and enabling (van Ingen, 1993). Female bodies entering masculine domains such as sport (Connell, 1987; Messner, 2011; Sabo, 2008) must negotiate their gender. The extent to which gender performances reinforce or challenge societal norms of femininity and masculinity produce a layered, cultural, and social space. Following Judith Butler’s argument that gender is a performance, the female bodies in this sport space also support that “gender is a performance with clearly punitive consequences” (Butler, 1990, p. 522). That is, when a woman’s performative acts are not aligned with traditional gender roles, there are repercussions at some level. Therefore, she negotiates a strategy to survive. These unconscious and complicated gender performances are articulated within a discourse where space, gender, and sport intersect. Following philosopher Henri Lefebvre’s (1991) ideas regarding the production of social space, I explore the ways in which female bodies negotiate the gendered sport space of coed soccer. Sporting bodies comprise sport space; their existence and interaction produce a place that is social and cultural. The ideas, attitudes, and beliefs that the bodies represent are displayed through performances (Butler, 1990). These are unconscious and reiterative acts that are the product of socially constructed ideas. My focus is on the gender performance of the female bodies in the coed soccer space. The manner in which gender is performed – unconsciously and culturally – is central to this project. I contend that these performances are the building blocks of social space. Specifically, exploring the gender performances of female bodies in a coed soccer space can provide a rich account of the intersection of gender, sport, and space.

In this chapter, I uncover the ways in which female bodies negotiate the gendered sport space of coed soccer. I discuss the ways in which gender is performed with six women playing in the soccer league. They share their internal and external struggles that construct the social space. Using qualitative methodologies including interviews and focus groups, I attempt to unearth the systems of power that contribute to these performances and the production of space. My in-depth discussion with six females participating in a mixed-sex adult recreational soccer league help illustrates they ways each body negotiates her gender on and through the sportscape.

Chapter 6: Negotiating (My) Gender, Power, and Participation

To further explore the culture of SCSA, I physically immerse myself in the sport space as a player in the league. The critical ethnography is driven by an epistemology of Physical Cultural Studies (Andrews, 2009; Giardina & Newman, 2011b), which privileges the lived experience and interaction among bodies – both the researchers and 'researched.' Informed by Physical Cultural Studies (PCS) I situate myself in the space among moving bodies that are simultaneously physical and cultural. These physical beings produce and represent culture by just being (male, female, fit, or fat) and by acting, moving, speaking. As a female soccer-playing researcher, I can better understand the social world by observing and interacting with these cultural beings. Prior to entering this space I recognize my own ontologies, axiologies, and ethical imperatives. Ontologically, I recognize that there are multiple realities and therefore seek to explore the same space from different perspectives to enhance understanding (see Ellingson's [2010] discussion of crystallization). This project captures multiple realities through interviews, focus groups, and my own self-reflexive participant observations. My observations are my own interpretations of reality. This ontological grounding follows Norman Denzin (2010) who suggests that there is no difference between fact and fiction: there is only interpretation. In regards to axiology, I value equity among people. I believe in creating spaces that allow men, women, and transgender individuals alike to play, compete, and express themselves in empowering ways such as sport. Ethically, I am aware of my prior bias or preconceived notions about this space. I reflect on “what I think about females/males/key decision makers in the league” and “what assumptions do I have about why or why not women participate.” I revisit these questions throughout my inquiry and at points include my own thoughts and struggles.

Formally, my ethical obligations also include approval from the SCSA board to conduct this inquiry, Institutional Review Board (IRB) approval, and informed consent from my participants. My time as a participant observer in the league includes two coed seasons (ten games in each season) over a period of ten months. I fully immerse myself in this space: interacting, socializing, and competing. I observe both male and female teammates, opponents, officials, and board members. The participants' actions, inaction, language (verbal and body), style of play, attire, equipment, and socialization practices are covered via descriptive field notes. Immediately following each of my experiences, I record my observations with thick, descriptive field notes. In addition to my external field notes I reflect internally on my own thoughts, positions, and attitudes on the experience. This incorporation of self-reflexivity (Carrington, 2009; Goodall, 2000; Richardson, 2000b) reveals my political and social agendas. Together the field notes and reflections are analyzed in a way that critiques the surfaces and underlying cultural practices of the league.

Chapter 7: Conclusion

In Chapter 7, I present my conclusions following ten months of participant observation, focus groups, and a dozen in depth interviews. Among the main impetuses for my project was an observation of the gradual decline of women participating in South City Soccer Association. The lack of participation was identified as a problem by the SCSA board. With this critical ethnography, I attempt to redefine the problem. I explore the culture of SCSA from the inside- out. Through my observations, I present recommendations to the board, which may help to ameliorate the lack of female participation. It is my intention to collaborate with board members as well as past, present, and potential female participants to foster an inclusive coed soccer league.

CHAPTER 2

REVIEW OF LITERATURE

Socio-cultural History of Women's Soccer in the United States

1900s-1960s

The United States is often recognized as a global leader in women's sport participation. This has not always been the case, however, particularly in regards to soccer. Women's soccer in the United States has European origins (Litterer, 2011). It was not until the late 1970s that competitive women's soccer took place in the U.S. among American women; almost a century earlier villages in England and Scotland held matches between married and unmarried women. Central Europe was another site of female footballing prior to 1900; despite this early participation, however, female participation in sport was often contrary to civil and religious laws in most of the world. The earliest records of football-playing females are in frescoes painted in China during the Donghan Dynasty (A.D. 25-220). A ban on girls soccer in China was set in place during the Qing Dynasty (which followed the Donghan Dynasty) and not lifted until 1920; this was approximately the same time the United States was introduced to women's competitive soccer by British women, though American women were not involved in competitive soccer at this time. British women played men in America (Markovits & Hellerman, 2006). Throughout the first half of the twentieth century, the major world wars contributed to a spread of women's soccer in Europe and then to North America. Female factory workers organized teams in England. The best-known team was comprised of ladies from the Dick, Kerr factory (Alexander, 2005). The Dick, Kerr team played women and men alike, drawing record- setting crowds for the time. They became so popular that the London Football Association saw them as a threat to men's football and put a ban on women’s football that lasted until 1970. The ban in England sent the women overseas; Dick, Kerr Ladies played a series of exhibition games against men's teams in the U.S. in 1922. The Dick, Kerr Ladies outscored their male opponents, 35-34 (Sherman, 2001). Unlike their English counterparts, American women did not play soccer outside gym class or school intramurals at this point in history. For much of the 20th century, athletic competition among women was discouraged; physical education instructors strongly opposed 20 competition among women, fearing it would make them less feminine and contribute to emotional stress (Nelson, 1998). Those in charge of the female physical education curriculum re- wrote the rules of soccer, creating a women’s version of the sport, more tame than the men’s game: Periods were shorter and players were confined to certain areas of the field in order decrease the ‘rigorous’ activity of running (Pettus, 1998), a practice we saw in earlier forms of women’s basketball as well. If two schools met to play, organizers mixed the squads with players from each school so as not to promote competition. Women still managed to compete in other arenas at that time in history; in 1917, Jeannette Rankin, a Republican from Montana, became the first woman to be elected to the U.S. House of Representatives (Gill, 2012). Following her first term, women gained the right to vote in the United States. This period in women’s history is referred to the first wave of feminism (Dicker, 2008). This era is characterized by the effort and accomplishment in gaining some civil equality between men and women such as the right to vote in the United States. Internationally, 1920-1930 was a notable decade for women’s sport. During this period, the Women's Olympic Games were held in direct response to the repeated refusal of the International Olympic Committee (IOC) and the International Amateur Athletic Federation (IAAF) to expand women’s events in the Olympic Games (Kidd, 1994). In 1920, women’s sports in the Olympics were limited to tennis, golf, archery, gymnastics, skating, and swimming. At the collegiate level, there is evidence of soccer competition. The oldest records denoting the game are from 1924 at Smith College, where the women’s athletic program allowed and promoted the formation of regular teams and the playing of competitive matches at the “‘interhouse, interclass, and intramural’ levels, while most women’s athletics occurred as a part of the ‘play days,’ a regular component of a rountinized physical education program” (Markovits & Hellerman, 2006, p. 19). As stated, competition among females was generally looked down upon. Smith College acknowledged this sentiment along with other women’s athletic programs and banned intercollegiate matches beginning in the early 1940s and lasting up to1971. Among children, soccer gained popularity in the 1950s and 1960s (Pettus, 1998). As Americans moved to the suburbs, grassy open fields were seen as ideal for a sport like soccer. The American Youth Soccer Organization (AYSO) was founded in 1964. By the late 1960s, leagues included teams of both boys and girls. While girls participated in soccer recreationally in

21 the 1960s, schools did not add girls’ soccer as a formally recognized competitive sport until the 1970s.

1970s – 1980s

During what is known as the second wave of feminism, women’s participation in sport and specifically soccer began to gain more momentum. The second wave of feminism followed World War II and was seen as both a cultural and legal battle. Women had demonstrated their ability to work outside the home during the war; many felt strongly that a woman’s role should not only be confined to cooking, cleaning, and child bearing (Dicker, 2008). Further, women should not continue to be considered second-class citizens or as Simone de Beauvoir (1961) explained, considered the “Second Sex.” Shifting ideas surrounding gender both culturally and legally would prove to be a battle (some would argue that battle continues to take place today). Culturally, women sought to change the way women were traditionally depicted in pop culture; for example, the media idealized domesticity for women. Shifting feminine ideals outside of the home and into the workplace, classroom, or sports arena was difficult, but like their first wave counterparts, shifting law was a successful strategy. Legal victories included: the Equal Pay Act of 1963, Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, a 1967 Executive Order extending full Affirmative Action rights to women, and Title IX. Title IX. The Mink Equal Opportunity in Education Act, named in honor of its principal author Congresswoman Patsy Mink (Hawaii – Democrat), is commonly known as Title IX. The law is among the 1972 Education Amendments to the 1964 Civil Rights Act. It states: “No person in the United States shall, on the basis of sex, be excluded from participation in, be denied the benefits of, or be subjected to discrimination under any education program or activity receiving Federal financial assistance...” (United States Code Section 20). Title IX was passed into law on June 23, 1972. Following its passage, a series of clarifications were made to further define “education program;” among the most controversial clarifications were those related to athletic programs. Some have even referred to Title IX’s applicability to sports as the most visible gender controversy of the past thirty years (Suggs, 2005). In 1975, the Department of Health, Education, and Welfare (HEW) stated that Title IX did refer to all educational institutions (high schools, colleges, universities) receiving federal funds. In direct opposition to the HEW decision was the

NCAA. The collegiate governing body made many attempts to reverse that decision, but was unsuccessful. The main focus of Title IX has been on colleges and universities which were given three years to comply with the Title IX regulations, but many institutions resisted. Therefore, another clarification to the policy came in 1979. The HEW interpreted compliance with the law to be determined by a three-prong test. Institutions receiving federal funding directly or indirectly must demonstrate compliance with Title IX by meeting one of the following three requirements:  All such assistance should be available on a substantially proportional basis to the number of male and female participants in the institution's athletic program.  Male and female athletes should receive equivalent treatment, benefits, and opportunities regarding facilities.  The athletic interests and abilities of male and female students must be equally effectively accommodated (Federal Register, 1979). Opposition and support of the law have come from all directions. Opponents argued (and still argue today) that it would decrease sport opportunities for males at the high school and collegiate level (Kaestener, 2007). To date no empirical evidence supports such claims. Between 1970-71 and 1977-78, the number of boys participating in high school sports actually increased approximately 20 % (National Federation of State High School Associations, 2002). Still, groups such as the National Wrestling Coaches Association purport that the decrease wrestling participation correlates with the implementation of Title IX. Liberal feminist organizations, such as National Organization of Women (NOW) are also critics of the legislation. NOW argues against the law's criteria to offer separate but equal as unconstitutional (Kaestener, 2007). The organization points to the monumental civil rights decision in Brown v. The Board of Education, which determined that separate is inherently not equal. NOW supports open access to both genders with the intention of closing the training gap. That is, females should be able to train and play with their male counterparts in order to continue to improve skill and catch up following hundreds of years of inequality. Supporters of Title IX point to the dramatic increase in female sport participation as a success. The effect was seen almost immediately: Between the 1970-71 and 1977-78 academic years, the number of girls participating in high school sports increased over 600%, from 294,015 to 2,083,040 (National Federation of State High School Associations, 2002). A similar trend was 23 seen at the collegiate level: In 1970, there were only 2.5 women’s teams per school and approximately 16,000 total female intercollegiate athletes. In 1977-78, the number of varsity sports for women had grown to 5.61 per school (Acosta & Carpenter, 2012). Women's soccer was among the additions to sports programs at both high school and collegiate levels. In 1975, Brown University became the first school to bestow varsity status on a team and ushered in what is considered the ‘modern era’ of women’s sports (Litterer, 2011). Other schools shortly followed Brown such as Castleton, Cortland State College in New York, Cornell, Colgate, the University of Rochester, and State University of New York-Albany. While most of these schools were located in the Northeastern part of the United States (a traditionally progressive area of the country), women's soccer spread quickly on account of already established men's programs throughout the country. Most were familiar with the game at this point. The men’s North American Soccer League (the first professional soccer league in the U.S.) marketed with the slogan "Soccer is a kick in the grass and girls play, too" (Goliath, 2002). Evidence of this slogan could be found throughout a growing number of athletic programs within higher education institutions. Collegiate expansion. In 1981, the first intercollegiate women's national championship was held (Markovits & Hellerman, 2006). The tournament was sponsored by the Association for Intercollegiate Athletics for Women (AIAW). The AIAW was the women’s version of the NCAA at this time. Up until this point, the NCAA refused to sponsor women's competition (recall the organization’s opposition to Title IX). In 1982, following the success of the intercollegiate tournament, the NCAA decided it was a good idea to expand to include women's soccer; it was with much hesitation that women's programs joined the association. Some saw the NCAA as having the resources and exposure to give legitimacy to the sport, while others decried the more competitive and less holistic approach taken by the NCAA and the loss of influence of women at the administrative level, where often the women’s programs were put in a subservient position to the established men’s programs (Litterer, 2011, The Early Game in the United States, para. 6 ). The University of North Carolina (UNC), which had a young soccer program at the time, hosted the NCAA’s first women’s soccer tournament. UNC won that first tournament, beginning a women’s soccer dynasty: Of the first 20 NCAA championships, 16 were won by UNC. Throughout its tenure on top, the program would produce notable talent in U.S. women’s soccer 24 such as, April Henrichs, Kristine Lilly, and Mia Hamm; and eventually the women would become ‘household’ names and even the first (female) role models for soccer-playing girls. High school and recreational growth. On the high school front, female participation increased incrementally with its biggest surge in the late 1980s. The delayed increase occurred following a 1987 piece of federal legislation that strengthened enforcement of Title IX with regard to sport (Stevenson, 2007). In 1981, there were 41,119 female high school soccer players. Twenty years later 292,086 females were playing soccer in high school (Sporting Goods Manufacturers Association, 2002). Recreationally, a similar surge took place within soccer: In 1980, the major youth soccer leagues in the U.S. (American Youth Soccer Organization, United States Youth Soccer Association, and the Soccer Association for Youth) reported approximately 888,705 participants. By 2001, that number soared to over 3.8 million. The youth leagues did not keep consistent gender records over that span, but an estimation of AYSO registration in 2000-2001 reports 348,000 registered girls and 317,000 boys (U.S. Soccer Foundation, 2002). Additionally, women made their mark in the club scene in the later part of the 20th century. Older women wanted to play after college, therefore women’s clubs and leagues became a major part of the United States Amateur Soccer Association (USASA); their growth was no less dramatic than it had been at the lower levels (Litterer, 2011). The grassroots participation in soccer created both a foundation and training ground for the formation of the first women’s U.S. national team in 1985. The American women were not immediately successful. Women’s soccer had a long history throughout Europe and Asia; America’s short fifteen-year history and lack of national support was evident. Their first few series of international competition resulted in losses and the team did not remain together. A more successful attempt came in preparation for the 1991 Women’s World Championship. This time the team was coached by then UNC women’s soccer coach (and now coaching legend), Anson Dorrance, who built a roster of young but talented college players.

1990s

U.S. women’s national team. In 1991, China hosted the first women’s soccer World Championship; Team USA took first place, defeating other soccer world powers such as Brazil, Sweden, and Norway (Litterer, 2011; Pettus, 1998). The United States was not “known” around

25 the globe for its soccer skill among either men and women. Therefore, the women’s 1991 title was quite a landmark. At that time, women’s soccer was not included in the Olympics; in 1991 the International Olympic Committee (IOC) announced that the event was “highly unlikely” to be part of the upcoming Olympics. In response to that declaration, a women’s soccer enthusiast named Marilyn Childress made it her goal to change the mind of the Olympic soccer administrators. With the help of women’s national team players such as Michelle Akers and April Henrichs, Childress succeeded in her campaign and in 1993 the IOC voted to admit women’s soccer in the 1996 Olympic Games (Pettus, 1998). The defending world champions competed against seven other countries in the 1996 Atlanta Olympic Games; Team USA defended its world champion title, winning the gold medal. The squad’s most notable victory came in 1999, when the Team USA defeated China in a shoot-out to win the title of Women’s World Cup Championship. The Cup took place in the United States and the final match is considered the largest event (both in regards to attendance and television ratings) in women’s sport history. It remains the highest television audience ever to watch a men’s or women’s soccer match in the United States (Markovits & Hellerman, 2006). The media frenzy that followed the victory has been well-documented and analyzed academically (Messner, Duncan & Cooky, 2003; Schultz, 2004; Shugart, 2003); the coverage and spectacle surrounding the event is considered a major landmark in women’s sport history. The 1999 World Cup Champions graced the cover of Sports Illustrated magazine. Images of the game-winning goal-scoring heroine, Brandi Chastain, remained in the media spotlight for weeks and are still referenced years later (Cooky, 2010; Daniels & Wartena, 2011; Schultz, 2004). Chastain celebrated the goal and victory by taking off her shirt to reveal a black Nike sports bra. The image evoked much discussion among popular media, as it confronted popular discourses of the female body, athleticism, and modesty (Shugart, 2003). For example, it was referred to in a New York Times article as an “impromptu striptease…a moment when talk of female athleticism, body image, and the objectification of women all converged” (Givhan, 2001, C02). Such examples of and reactions within pop culture played a role in the character of women’s soccer in the United States. Specifically, and as with many sports, the media consumption of women’s soccer influenced audiences’ perceptions of the sport both consciously and unconsciously. 26

Soccer and pop culture in the 1990s. The media coverage of the 1999 Women’s World Cup greatly exceeded the coverage of women’s soccer in the1996 Olympic Games. Both events were held in the United States and both featured similar players at a time when interest in women’s/girls' soccer was on the rise. Some journalists even celebrated the Atlanta Games as “the Gender Equity Olympics” (McCallum & O’Brien, 1996, p. 17). However, many scholars, such as David L. Andrews (1998), problematize the intersection of gender and the 1996 Olympics, specifically in regards to the style of media coverage and the events highlighted by the media. In his article “Feminizing Olympic Reality” Andrews points out that the National Broadcasting Corporation (NBC) “discovered” the female audience in 1996 and thus manufactured the Games in an effort to seduce female viewers. NBC was driven by the conclusion that men would watch the Games regardless of what or how it was covered; therefore, the network created a strategy to entice more female viewers. However, this did not bode well for sweaty, physical female events such as women’s soccer. Instead, more focus was given to sports such as gymnastics and swimming. These events were aired during peak times, incorporated more personal interest stories (which supposedly were more attractive to female viewers), and actually increased the number of days gymnastics, swimming, and diving events were held in an effort to capitalize on primetime advertising dollars. In contrast, and despite their success, sports such as basketball and soccer were generally excluded from the “female appropriate” broadcasts. A mere three years later, however, some argued that women’s soccer was a main event. In The Girls of Summer: The U.S. Women’s Soccer Team and How it Changed the World, Jere Longman (2001) describes how the women’s national team took over the media spotlight in the summer of 1999. Longman, in fact, argues that the media coverage of the team put women’s soccer on the map. In contrast, scholars such as Michael A. Messner, Margaret Carlisle Duncan, and Cheryl Cooky (2003) came to a different opinion through their critical analysis. The research team analyzed ESPN SportsCenter broadcasts in the weeks leading up to and following the 1999 Women’s World Cup. Their critical analysis was closer aligned with Andrews (1998) examination of the 1996 Olympics, though observed the coverage was directed to a masculine audience. The quantity and quality of women’s sport coverage had not changed since a previous analysis in 1999. Specifically, Messner et al. (2003) concluded the following:

Televised sports news and highlight shows showed continued gender asymmetries in televised sports news and highlight shows: (a) the choice to devote a considerable proportion of the already-thin coverage of women’s sports to humorous feature stories on non-serious women’s sports, and (b) the (often humorous) sexual objectification of 10 athlete women and non-athlete women (p. 38). Along with media outlets, other industries attempted to capitalize on the success and continued growth of women’s sport in the nineties. Sport apparel companies such as Nike and Reebok invested heavily into cultivating female customers. The first endorsement contract came shortly after the women’s first World Championship title in 1991; Umbro, a leading soccer equipment company of the time, signed 1991 team captain, Michelle Akers, as the company’s first woman’s soccer playing spokesperson. Following the 1996 Olympic victory, U.S. star Mia Hamm became an official spokesperson for Nike, Gatorade, Pert Plus shampoo and even the new soccer Barbie. The iconic toy proclaimed, “I can kick and throw like Mia Hamm," (Starr, 1999, p. 61). These business partnerships demonstrate the ways in which "opportunities for women to play sports and earn endorsements and make money from the industry have grown exponentially ... ‘marketers are realizing that there's an audience'" (Clarke, 2000, p. 1C). Representations of soccer-playing females were also first found in mediums such as books and movies. Popular children’s texts such as the Berenstein Bears and Boxcar Kids incorporated soccer into the pastimes of their characters (Pettus, 1998). On the big screen girls were seen donning cleats and shin-guards for the first time in the 1990s (Pearson, 2010). While this may seem like another “stride” in women’s sport, some have critiqued the representations as reinforcing a heteronormative ideal and gender order. In Ladybugs (1992), for example, a girls’ soccer team takes the field coached by actor/comedian Rodney Dangerfield and features as its star player a boy who poses as a girl so as to make the team more competitive. Demetrius Pearson’s (2010) discussion of “sheroes” in films post Title IX, critiques this depiction and points out how the film reflects “the omnipotent power and dominance of male leaders, and their uncanny ability to success in spite of the odds” (p. 239). Further examination of over 30 post- Title IX Female Sport films (three of the 20 depict soccer – in addition to Ladybugs (1992), She’s the Man (2006), and Gracie (2007), produced the following themes:

10 Messner et al. (2003) is discussed here to provide an element of historical context for women’s soccer in the U.S. Later the scholarly work will be used to explain the media representation of women’s soccer. 28

 Women have rarely been portrayed as leaders or decision makers within sport;  When they did achieve leadership roles, they were rarely due to merit, athletic prowess, or cognitive expertise;  Heterosexual attractiveness rivaled film content;  Films were frequently comedic; and  Biographic portrayals have been rare (Pearson, 2010, p. 243). These popular representations may have seemed like advancements in women’s sport on the surface, but a critical analysis points to the ways they may subtly oppress. Images of Chastain’s sports bra, Hamm’s heteronormative Barbie, and Dangerfield’s ‘Cinderella-like’ soccer team can be problematic in the manner in which women and sport, soccer and femininity intersect. Even more problematic were the trends being observed among school-age girls as it related to sports and physical activity. Governmental initiatives. Throughout the 1990s, sport activities were largely available to most genders, ages, and social class; this was often the result of public funding through school-based programs. Even so, experts in health, sport, and exercise began to document increasing trends of inactivity. Therefore, in an effort to increase physical activity levels of children and adults, a 1996 Surgeon General’s report recommended the expansion of school- based interventions. School-based interventions for youth are particularly promising, not only for their potential scope—almost all young people between the ages of 6 and 16 years attend school—but also for their potential impact. Nearly half of young people 12 to 21 years of age are not vigorously active; moreover, physical activity declines during adolescence. Childhood and adolescence may thus be pivotal times for preventing sedentary behavior among adults by maintaining the habit of physical activity throughout the school years (USDHHS 1996, p. 12) A similar recommendation was made in a report by The President’s Council on Physical Fitness and Sports (1997) entitled, “Physical Activity & Sports in the Lives of Girls.” Specific mechanisms which enhance girls’ opportunities to be physically active must be developed and supported. Recreational, school-based physical education and sport programs are ideal ways to facilitate both health-related fitness and the acquisition of

fundamental motor skills for a lifetime of activity (The President’s Council on Physical Fitness and Sports 1997, p. xv) Bill Clinton was president of the United States at this time and his focus on the “lives of girls” and even soccer was a common theme in his platforms (Carroll, 1999). Beginning with his election in 1996, gender played an important role. The Voter News Service (VNS) exit poll reported 54% of women voted for Clinton, compared to only 43% of men. This created a gender gap of 11 percentage points. According to the VNS exit poll, women's votes provided the margin of victory for Clinton; men split their votes evenly between the two presidential candidates while women showed a strong preference for Clinton over Dole (Center for the American Woman and Politics, 1998). During the 1996 campaign, the media gave a great deal of attention to a group of swing voters labeled “soccer moms” (Carroll, 1999). Some media outlets labeled 1996 as "The Year of the Soccer Mom." In general, soccer moms were described as married, white, suburban women. More specifically, she drove a minivan, toted snacks and orange juice for the kids and took extra lawn chairs. She may be a full-time homemaker or work outside the home and a part of the working or upper class (Safire, 1996). Most importantly, she sees the world through the eyes of her children and is most concerned about their future (MacFarquhar, 1996). Therefore, the Clinton campaign's support of issues such as school uniforms, teen curfews, expansion of the Family and Medical Leave Act, and longer hospital stays for childbirth were said to target soccer moms (Carroll, 1999). Following his election, the children of soccer moms, particularly the “lives of girls” was among his priorities. Under Clinton's direction, the President’s Council on Physical Fitness and Sports (1997) concerned itself with the increasing levels physical activity and sport in the lives of girls. As referenced above, the Council sought to diminish the gender gap as it relates to sport opportunities and participation. To further its cause, the council referenced the female athletes such as the U.S. Women's Soccer Team: Americans took enormous pride in the accomplishments of the 1996 Olympic gold medal female athletes in soccer, softball, swimming, track and field, gymnastics, basketball, and other sports. We need to build on that spirit and develop a national commitment to ensure that every girl receives the encouragement, training, and support she needs to develop and maintain an active lifestyle....Increasing physical activity among girls is a formidable 30

public health challenge, but the potential rewards are great: A more vigorous nation, better health and greater leadership opportunities for girls, prevention of premature death and unnecessary illness, and a higher quality of life for our citizens. We strongly encourage all Americans to join us in this effort (p. 5). This well-intentioned rhetoric addressed issues described by Don Sabo and Phil Veliz (2011) as “Progress without Equity.” Through an examination of gender equity in interscholastic sport the authors examined gender differences in athletic opportunities throughout the United States in the years 1993-94, 1999-2000, and 2005-06. Key findings of their report supported by the Women’s Sports Foundation include:  Boys received a larger proportion of athletic participation opportunities than girls did for each school year in all communities (i.e., urban, suburban, town, and rural).  Girls were provided proportionately fewer athletic participation opportunities than boys during each school year and in all geographic regions (i.e., Northeast, Midwest, South and West).  While high schools gradually increased their allocations of athletic participation opportunities between 1993-94 and 2005-06, progress toward closing the gender gap slowed after 2000. While the report was less than promising for future of girls' sport, on a different level effort was made to broaden the reach of women's soccer.

2000s

Women's professional soccer in the United States. The turn of the century marked another significant milestone in women's soccer history. In the spring of 2000, the Women's United Soccer Association (WUSA) was founded by John Hendricks, Chairman and CEO of Discovery Communications (Markovits & Hellerman, 2006). Hendricks, along with other investors such as Time Warner Cable and Comcast Corporation mapped out a five-year business plan with the goal of creating a self-sufficient women's professional soccer league. The WUSA consisted of eight teams located throughout the United States (Atlanta, Boston, Carolina, New York, Philadelphia, San Diego, San Jose and Washington, DC), each playing a 22 game season from April through August. Player salaries in the WUSA were set at a yearly minimum of

$27,000 and a maximum of $85,000 (at that time in the MLS the maximum salary was $1.75 million and the minimum was $20,000) (Litterer, 2011). The professional league's farm team system was the W-League, a player development league established in 1995 and still in existence today. The W-League's amateur status provides a training ground for college players wanting to compete at the next level, such as the WUSA. In its first season, 2001, WUSA teams were comprised of players with mixed skill levels. Each team fielded both U.S. National Team players and recruits from the W-League. Initially, play was rocky as players got to know one another (Litterer, 2011); but overall, the league started off well. Attendance numbers hovered around 8,000 per match (more than predicted) and TV ratings met expectations. Moreover, young female soccer players were able to watch role models on television like their male counterparts had for over 30 years. Michael Giardina and Jennifer Metz (2005) take a critical approach to the WUSA; they point to the ways in which the WUSA contributed to the corporatization of national identity. By this they mean that “entities such as WUSA, as well as other transnational corporate capitalist enterprises operating on a global scale, are now more so than ever visibly in league with the State in defining the boundaries of ‘cultural citizenship’” (p. 109). For example, the WUSA’s partnership with AYSO assumes that targeting young consumers, by suggesting that soccer/sport/WUSA is the all-American ‘thing’ to support, for a sport product is healthy/right/equates to good citizenship. These cultural messages seem innocent but hailing individuals to idealize a certain ‘type’ of fan/athlete/citizen is problematic in what is supposed to be a heterogeneous country. The professional women's soccer fairy tale did not last long. In 2003, the league suspended operations on account of financial difficulties. The suspension came shortly after the end of its third season; the league reported cumulative losses of around $100 million. According to Litterer (2011), the league may have started out too big and tried to grow too quickly; financial losses were enormous. Nevertheless, the seed had been planted, and the league began organizational efforts to raise money and re-launch in a different form in the near future. Players dispersed into the W-League (and its west coast / Puerto Rico counterpart, the Women's Premier League). In 2004, attention turned toward the Olympic Games, where the U.S. Women's National team took home the gold. Meanwhile, plans were being made for another professional women's 32 soccer league in the United States. The next professional women's soccer endeavor would build upon the seeds planted and lesson learned from the WUSA. In 2009, the Women's Professional Soccer League (WPS or WPSL) launched comprised of seven teams with the intention of expanding annually. Prior to the launch, soccer organizers used a thorough market analysis in order to best situate the new leagues. The analysis led WPS founders to focus on the ways in which to best involve, the “large number of girls and women that participate in soccer at recreational levels (WSII, 2004). One of the strategies the WPS used was a focus on social media and with the goal of creating an unparalleled amount of player–fan interaction. The WPS implemented these strategies for three seasons. But again, women's professional soccer was halted in the United States. This time a legal issue with a former owner led to the decision to suspend operations early in 2012; according to WPS CEO, Jennifer O'Sullivan, the WPS is committed to resuming play in 2013 (WPS, 2012). Then on May 18, 2012, WPS officials announced the league was indeed folding (Dure, 2012). Soccer and pop culture in the 2000s. The WPS announcement came almost one year after a second place finish for the U.S. National Team in the 2011 Women’s World Cup. While the talent and excitement surrounding the Germany-based tournament did not exceed that of the memorable 1999 Cup in the United States, the quantity and quality of media coverage mimicked those of years passed. In “Women's soccer still an international afterthought,” Chicago Tribune writer Phillip Hersh (2010) critiques FIFA President Sepp Batter’s 1999 prediction that “the future of soccer is feminine.” Months before the 2011 Women’s World Cup, Hersh, “was stunned to find that the main public web site for FIFA, the international federation, contained no permanent link on its front page for anything to do with the women's game”(para. 6). He found the same silent trend on both the Italian and U.S. soccer federation pages. Throughout the competition a new all-American soccer heroine emerged, U.S. goal keeper, Hope Solo. Following the team’s loss in the finals against Japan, Sports Illustrated (SI) chose not to picture the Japanese Champions but instead a disappointed Hope Solo with the headline “Heart and Heartbreak.” In response to the SI cover and media coverage surrounding the loss, Seattle Times reporter Bob Condotta (2011) raised the question: “Would the U.S. men's team, or a professional team in another sport, have received the same sort of generally sympathetic coverage if it performed similarly, losing a game and championship it was widely expected to win?” (para. 6). Condotta argued that if the loss had been by men, it would have been 33 reported as a “choke” not a “heartbreak;” instead the media further reproduced the gender order in its sports coverage. Turning to film, the quality and quantity of soccer-playing females on the big screen did shift in the twenty-first century; though again, “progress without equity” may best describe the development. Three films depicting footballing females were produced in the past ten years: Bend It like Beckham (2002), She’s the Man (2006), and Gracie (2007). Each features girls’ soccer, representing cultural themes such as gender, race, and sexuality (Pearson, 2010). Each also tells a story about a female as she overcome ‘odds’ in her soccer career. Bend It Like Beckham, strategically released before the 2002 FIFA World Cup, depicts a British Asian football playing teenager and her struggle with her family’s cultural ideals of women and sport. While movie-goers celebrated its attempt at capturing cultural hybridity, scholars critiqued it for its surface representation of complex and historical cultural structures (Giardina, 2003). Turning to gender inequality in the United States, She’s the Man and Gracie both tells stories of high school age girls that must play on boys’ teams to pursue their soccer careers. Gracie is a drama set in the years pre-Title IX; it is based on the true story of actress Elisabeth Shue and her experience earning a spot on the boys’ high school team. She’s the Man is a romantic comedy starring Amanda Bynes; in the movie Bynes must dress in drag in order to play soccer for the high school team. The movie has been critiqued by the soccer community for its inaccurate presentation of the rules of the game (IMDB, 2002; IMDB, 2007). To some extent, however, the themes in each movie do reflect current trends in girls and women’s soccer participation. Governmental initiatives. Throughout the beginning of the twenty-first century, the White House has remained a voice of health and fitness encouragement. Following Clinton’s focus on the lives of girls, Bush expanded the Council’s scope to include adults. In 2003, Chairman of the council, Lynn Swann, introduced the Presidential Active Lifestyle Award (PALA) to the media, and announced that the program would be offered to adults as well youth (History of the President's Council on Physical Fitness and Sports, 2012, The President’s Challenge Grows Up, para. 77). At this time obesity was a concern among adults and including them in the presidential initiative was thought to help ameliorate the issue. Though, the Council often played a more symbolic role than a policy-producing arm. Attention returned back primarily to children under President Obama. Childhood obesity became viewed as the greater epidemic and programs such as Play 60 were promoted to increase 34 physical activity among children. The White House partnered primarily with the National Football League to promote the initiative, with players such as Drew Brees (the symbolic Chairman of President’s Council on Sports, Fitness, and Nutrition) used as spokesmen for the Play 60 campaign. It is important to note that the partnership is with a professional sport league that has no female counterpart and represents a sport that is primarily played by men (unlike basketball, soccer, baseball/softball). There is female representation on the council, seven of the 17 members are female: they include a former gymnast, tennis player, ice skater, sprinter, the three administrators—no female soccer players. As it relates to another federal program, in 2012, NCAA and high school programs are still working to achieve compliance with Title IX (Acosta & Carpenter, 2012). Forty years after its passing, lawsuits are filed annually citing gender discrimination as it relates to athletic programs (Megliola, 2012). Title IX remains controversial and equal opportunities for females are met still met with resistance. This inequality plays out socially, culturally, and physically.

Theorizing Gender and Soccer

Bodies collide. Feet hit shins, ankles, and calves. Heads knock, elbows jab. Sites of physicality, such as sporting spaces, are sites of struggles. Physical, social, and cultural struggles occur on a soccer pitch. With and within the production of goals, volleys, slide tackles, as well as bruises, sweat, and fatigue, also comes the production of social space, identities, and practices. Sporting bodies comprise this social space, each constructing a performance. These bodies are not uniform, but unique physically, socially, and culturally; these bodies are gendered physically, socially, and culturally. The ways in which gender is constructed and performed are central in social spaces, particularly within social spaces comprised of many different gendered bodies. In such mixed-gendered sporting spaces, gender performances act an impetus for the production of this space. The performances are real, tangible, and tacit but at the same time ideological and imagined. At the intersection of these performances (real and imagined) is a social struggle. Within the production of social spaces, identities and practices both comprise the space and simultaneously produce it. Bodies behave in certain ways, wear certain things, and talk in certain ways – each act produces meaning and represents ideas that generate an identity. Further, the bodies are organized and ordered physically in ways that reinforce societal ideologies. These are among the practices that constitute social space. Together, spaces, identities, and practices

35 relate with one another physically, socially, and culturally. In a social space such as sport, identities and practices are significant elements of the culture; they represent deeply embedded ideologies, which may be widely accepted on the surface but deemed problematic when critically analyzed. My project aims to critically analyze these surface-level dynamics including spaces, identities, and practices of female sporting bodies, which I refer to as “sporting femininities.” This section discusses theoretical explanations surrounding space, gender, and sport with a particular focus on women’s experiences and women’s bodies; it acts as a foundation for a larger project that explores the social struggles of female bodies in an adult recreational coed soccer league. Sport is a gendered space and a coed sport space is a venue that may provide a physical, competitive, and social outlet; but it can also create an environment that constrains, subordinates, and divides (Hargreaves, 1994). Female bodies entering so-called masculine domains such as sport must negotiate their gender (Connell, 1987; Messner, 2000). The production involves physical and cultural bodies interacting, displaying symbols, embodying values, and creating identities. These acts constitute performances, that while unconscious and often interacting at some level with societal norms, they are influenced by an individual’s unique subjectivity. The performances are constructed amid ideals and embedded societal definitions of space, gender, and sport. Theoretically, I draw on Lefebvre’s (1991) ideas regarding the production of space. Lefebvre's (1991) use of a triad to represent different aspects of spatial qualities can be likened to the three aspects of culture discussed in this section: spaces, identities, and practices. The aspects may stand alone, interact, and/or overlap—each manifestation contributes to a complex social discourse. Following Butler (1990), I contend that the spaces of coed soccer and the multiple, competing, and conflicting identities on display therein simultaneously constitute and produce gender performances. Further, the bodies within the spaces are organized physically and culturally in and through societal structures. My analysis of a societal structure such as coed soccer includes a discussion of social spaces, identities, and practices informed by feminist theory. It follows Gillian Rose’s (1993) discussion of the geographies of gender, and Elizabeth Grosz’s (1995) description of the body as a socio-cultural artifact. Through this lens, I unpack the spatial qualities of a coed soccer league.

Sporting Femininities

Spaces.

The social construction of space. Lefebvre made significant contributions to the sociological discussion regarding space and how it is produced. He described space as both the medium and outcome of social relations (Lefebvre, 1991; 2003; Soja, 1996; van Ingen, 2003). That is, social beings/bodies physically inhabit space and through those bodies and space, meaning is produced. Be it signs, symbols, or language, meaning is articulated on and through bodies creating social space. Within and through these semiotic bodies, values and ideologies are represented contributing to the production of social space. The production of social space, as understood by Lefebvre, is distinct in that, “rather than define the body through space, he explored how bodies create or produce space” (van Ingen, 2003, p. 202). For Lefebvre, the concept of space is best defined as consisting of multiple parts—there is material or physical space, conceived or imagined space, and a site of struggle or conflict where the real and imagined intersect. This multi-dimensional definition of space is key in this project that explores gender, sport, and space. The female sporting bodies involved in this project experience each version of space and articulate their experiences of the material, the imagined, and the struggle – all that constitute social space. This project gives voice to the abstract elements of space and ways in which the sporting space is constructed. A study exploring the multiple forms of space works against the silencing of knowledges; these are the bodies and subjectivities that are often ignored or subordinated by dominant ideas or individuals (Soja, 1996). By dissecting the complex production of social space, we can unearth powerful systems at work reproducing forms of control, which can materialize as oppression. "(Social) space is a (social) product…the space thus produced also serves as a tool of thought and of action...in addition to being a means of production it is also a means of control, and hence of domination, of power" (Lefebvre, 1991, p. 26). Expressions of power and control are central to the Lefebvre's understanding of social space. He is concerned with the way in which the social production of space is driven by cultural hegemony (Gramsci, 1972). That is, how certain ideas and systems become the dominant way of thinking or acting without a hierarchical command or physical force but through a mass dispersion of power which creates

37 modes of social control. The modes through which hegemony is expressed and reproduced come in a corporeal form. Among social spaces involving systems of power and corporal forms is sport. The construction of “sport space” in and through bodies is the theme connecting the essays within Sites of Sport: Space, Place, Experience (Vertinsky & Bale, 2004). The authors point out a distinction between space and place; in short, space is formless while places are signified with unique characteristics (Tuan, 1982). For example, an open field may be defined as a space, while an open field marked with white boundary lines, soccer goals, outdoor lighting, and rival squads, is a place. There are many examples of both concepts within sport. At the core, sport contests are struggles over space. Often in sport the spatial rules, be it architecture of the landscape (training facilities, practice grounds, arenas, stadiums) or rules of the games, are created by men. And “those who command space can always control the politics of place, even though it takes control of some place to command space in the first place” (Harvey, 1989, p.35). The control of a place such as a soccer complex is an interest in this project, both presently and historically. A focus on a community’s soccer fields / league answers Patricia Vertinsky’s (2004) call to explore “local gyms and sporting sites” because they “have tended to be neglected as sites of study while their various orderings of space embody constructions of race, place, gender, and identity” (Vertinsky, 2004, p. 13). Caroline Fusco’s (2004) exploration of the locker room as a site for the inscription of public health discourse examines how the technologies and practices of everyday life operate in sport and exercise sites, which contribute to the rhetoric of public health and the ideological sporting public. Each of these is a site of cultural politics where ideologies surrounding gender and sport are constructed, performed, negotiated, and challenged. Dominant ideologies are manifested in social space through bodies. Specifically, ideas about femininity and masculinity, what it means / looks like to be a “woman” or a “man”, is written on and displayed through bodies. These cultural practices are performatively rendered in language, the results of which inform our understandings of social space. Performing bodies are organized throughout society creating cultural maps. Elements of culture such as race, social class, and gender are represented or not represented in specific social spaces. That is, the non- existence of a certain gender, class, or race may define a space. For example, in most cities, one can point to historically ‘black neighborhoods,’ ‘white neighborhoods,’ ‘rich neighborhoods,’ ‘poor neighborhoods,’ ‘Italian neighborhoods,’ ‘Irish neighborhoods,’ or even ‘gay 38 neighborhoods.’ There are “traditional” (or normative) women’ s spaces (think: Junior League, quilting groups, or breast cancer walks) and men’s spaces (think: a football field, race track, or country club). This type of social organization creates a socio-cultural geography. This project discusses the geography of gender as it relates to a coed soccer league. Geographies of gender. In Feminism and Geography: The Limits of Geographical Knowledge, Rose (1993) begins her project by pointing to the academic discipline of geography as a masculine domain. Her argument first includes an observation of the lack of women in the professional field and academic discipline; then she explains how a feminist lens is rarely applied when studying geography. She aims to fill this gap by analyzing space and geography through a feminist lens. In doing so, Rose stimulates debates regarding the nature and construction of geographical knowledge. Rose sees geography as central to social theory. Similar to Lefebvre, she sees spatial structures as a product and reproduction of social life. In regards to gender, Rose argues that certain spaces are reserved for males while others are reserved for females. In these constructions of gendered geographies, bodies are excluded from particular spaces not by physical structures or force but social mechanisms of control. Relatedly, Liz Bondi (1998b) provides three scenarios depicting the geography of gender in On the Contours of Space. She presents three narratives of women living in three different time periods in the twentieth century. The narratives depict how female bodies are organized in society and focuses of the spatial qualities of the accounts. One hundred years ago, female bodies were confined to private spaces (homes); labor was conducted primarily in the home (cooking, cleaning, and childrearing). Over time, the division of labor became less rigid; eventually it was acceptable for women to work and even leisure outside the home but their commutes/outings were still constrained. That is, there were routes and destinations avoided by and prohibited to women. Today, evidence of geographical constraints is still seen. Bondi notes that even in the later part of the twentieth century there were particular neighborhoods that when given a choice, women would not live alone. Moreover, even in what a woman may acknowledge as a 'safe' neighborhood, she will likely not venture outside of her home alone, after dark. According to one woman’s tale relayed by Bondi (1998b): If I’m not driving, I get a taxi, or someone else gives me a lift, and if I’m walking, I’m walking in the company of other people...If I were walking up that lane (near her home)…(and) if there was a single man or more than one man walking together, I would 39

be happier (to be) inside my front door…(There have been) too many attacks on women especially in the most unlikely parts of town, areas that are considered “safe” (p. 238). This woman describes her own neighborhood as reasonably safe; and even in her own career has experienced ideological shifts relating gender appropriate jobs (she started as a secretary, a position once deemed only ‘natural’ for females, and later became an advertising executive, a position once deemed only ‘natural’ for men). While she celebrates this progression and perceives her access to the public sphere to be unlimited, in reality hegemony is at work, coercively constraining her movements (Bondi, 1998b). Be it a neighborhood, market, workplace, or sport space – the public sphere can constitute spatial qualities that exclude certain bodies. The exclusion or division is not brought upon because of something a body says or does. Instead, it is a product of the cultural marks that body wears – male, female, masculinity, femininity. For Grosz, Bodies are never simply human bodies or social bodies. The sex assigned to body (and bodies are assigned a single sex, however inappropriate this may be) makes a great deal of difference to the kind of social subject, and indeed the mode of corporeality assigned to the subject (Grosz, 1995, p. 84). In other words, the body is a socio-cultural artifact. Grosz explores the construction of the artifact from the inside out and from the outside in. Each view provides insight on the relationship between biology and culture with the intention of showing “how the body is psychically, socially, sexually, and representationally produced” (Grosz, 1995, p. 104). On a more macro-level, Grosz explores the relationship between bodies and cities. She contemplates whether or not one is a product of the other or if they are produced alongside one another, developing on a parallel track. While she does not completely embrace either explanation, she argues that it is important we recognize that there is a relationship between bodies and cities and more importantly bodies and space. That is, bodies and cities or bodies and space are in a dialectic relationship – one already and always constituting the other. This is both a social and physical relationship. The orchestration of social relationships in a space such as sport has been recognized by many scholars (see Cahn, 1994; Connell, 1987; Hargreaves, 1994; Kane, 1995). Sport’s cultural geography as it relates to gender has also been well documented (Bale, 2003; Connell, 1995; Crosset, 1990; van Ingen, 2003). It has been described as a masculine domain (Messner & Sabo, 40

1990) and a male preserve (Dunning, Birrell, & Cole, 1994), though this conception has largely referred to the social and cultural dynamics of sport. I contend that sport’s gendered character goes ‘beyond’ social and cultural ideologies; the gendered space is also represented physically. Sporting bodies and spaces are organized and segmented, physically, thereby further reinforcing gendered systems of power. Space, gender, and sport. Public and private spaces as they relate to sport are contemplated by John Bale in “Space, Place, and Body Culture” (1996) as he works through the writings of geographer Yi-Fu Tuan. Both Tuan and then Bale unpack spatial evolution. Tuan’s original work questions they ways in which spatial segmentation relates to a construction of self (Tuan, 1982). Bale extends Tuan’s argument to sports; he points out the way in which sporting spaces have evolved from being played in the streets, public square, and fields to being played indoors in enclosed spaces like arenas and stadiums, and contemplates what these societal shifts say about individuals. For example, are people more private, possessive, or individualistic? Further, he observes how sport participation has become secondary to sport spectatorship; at one time more people participated in sport, today sport spectators outnumber sport participants. These personal, collective, and geographical shifts in the sport landscape are cultural signposts. Although Bale does not directly address gender, the shift of sport from public to private, participating to spectating, may be likened to the ways in which females experience sport throughout life: First public (backyards, stadiums) then private (fitness studios, tennis lessons), first participant then spectator. Returning to Tuan (1982), he contends that the segmentation of sporting bodies represent people's growing sense of self and their need for greater individual and group privacy. As Bale struggles with whether this shift is 'good' or 'bad,' he reflects on his own journey as a runner – competitively and instinctively. This reflective technique is also used to present the sporting journeys of the female soccer-playing participants within this project. Their journeys articulate how each negotiates the intersection of space, gender, and sport. A female’s experience in sport is not neutral; instead, her relationship with sport is characterized by power systems, ordered systems, and division. John Hargreaves (1986) discusses the ways in which traditional sporting models reinforce traditional gender roles by supporting ideas about the sexual division of labor, at work and at home, as the “natural” state of affairs: 41

There has been a long history of excluding women from traditional male sports since their formative years in the nineteenth century women have been excluded even from such sports as snooker and darts which require very little muscular power, but have been traditional male leisure preserves, leaving women to their 'separate spheres' of the home and the family. (p. 112) A review of research on women and sport suggests that this history of exclusion may also work to produce a discourse that cultivates a sense of belonging for women through sport (Walseth, 2006). Among a group of 21 Norwegian Muslim women, Kristin Walseth found that some sport clubs fostered feelings of belonging to a local community. While most of the women expressed a positive connection and a sense of belonging through sport participation, some felt excluded and isolated as a member of a team. The various depictions of sporting experiences help to create multi-vocal illustrations of the subjective experiences of the women and how different meanings can be attached to similar experiences. It is through these lived experiences and individual articulations that we can better understand sport's societal and cultural role in belonging and excluding – uniting and dividing. With a focus on the division of labor as it relates to sport, Shona Thompson’s project, Mother’s Taxi: Sport and Women’s Labor (1999), follows three groups of women documenting their efforts / service as it relates to sport. They are mothers and wives who dedicate a considerable amount of time and energy to chauffeuring children to practices, washing uniforms, and preparing food all in the name of sport. The later portion of the book relays the experiences of female tennis players (both mothers and wives) and how they negotiate sport and family. A common theme throughout the narratives is the 'second class' position their own sport pursuits take to their husbands' and children. More often than not, the women make sacrifices to enable their husbands to pursue their sporting interests. As Thompson (1999) writes, “They kept their sport hidden from their family, not allowing it to detrimentally affect their ability to maintain their domestic responsibilities.... Meanwhile, their tennis was structurally and conceptually marginalized” (p. 22). These narratives depict one way gender relations are embedded in sport. The manner in which a woman’s sporting pursuits are subordinated even with their own consent, demonstrates a hegemonic family life. Further, the gender order is reproduced as they compromise their sporting interests.

Ideologies of gender are also embedded in sport (Hargreaves, 1986b). “In sport 'masculine' identity incorporates images of activity, strength, aggression, and muscularity and it implies, at the same time, and opposite 'feminine' subjectivity associated with passivity, relative weakness, gentleness, and grace” (p. 112). Specific sports have come to foreground a particular gendered knowledge: American football and ice hockey are largely considered masculine while gymnastics, ice-skating, and synchronized swimming are typically considered feminine (MacDowell & Schaffner, 2011). Therefore, when a woman enters a so-called “masculine” sport space she must negotiate her gender and in doing so that sport is challenged. For example, a female football player on a men’s team or an all-female football team disrupts a sporting norm; it is surprising and sometimes newsworthy. That female football player or all-female football team must confront comments, questions, and judgments. They must constantly negotiate their mark as Other on the field. This social process of negotiating gender and gendered expectations is advanced by Gordon Waitt (2008) in his essay “In 'killing waves:' Surfing, space, and gender.” Waitt argues that gender and surf space are mutually constituted and provides examples of this through a qualitative methodology. Framed by Elspeth Probyn’s (2003) “spatial imperative of subjectivities and the performance of corporeal femininities and masculinities,” the project displays the “relationships between space, gender, and surfing bodies” as a complex and contradictory discourse (Waitt, 2008, p. 75). The performances of corporeal femininities in sport spaces contribute to the production of the social spaces. Bodily performances and their construction of sport space is a central tenet of my project on female soccer-playing bodies in a coed sport league. It is in and through bodies where performances of sporting femininities produce meaning and construct identities. Identities. Social beings possess socially produced identities (Althusser, 2000). That is, one’s identity is not merely an innate characteristic but formed through external influences. As de Beauvoir writes, “one is not born but rather becomes a woman” (1949, p. 267). This statement suggests that a biological explanation of gender identity is inadequate. Because, also at work (and even more significant) are external influences producing to identity; these include cultural ideas such as norms, values, beliefs and also even more concrete forms of culture such as the media, art, music, and sport. The relationship between identities and cultural representations is

43 not one-way; instead, it is a dialectic relationship in which both are constantly influencing one another. The dialectic relationship is not just limited to real time actions and language, but it is formed by way of historical forces. Ben Carrington (2009) suggests historical forces and social formations make identity possible. He draws on Stuart Hall’s (1996) notion of identity as affected by history and culture; it is not a finished product, rather, it is an ongoing production. Based on this understanding, identities were now considered “more amenable to reconstitution than previously thought possible” (Du Gay, Evans, & Redman, 2000, p. 2). Therefore, the production of identities in and through social structures such as sport provides a rich domain for exploration. Sporting identities. Individual identities and identity relations inform and are informed by sport (Aitchison, 2007). As Cara Aitchison argues in Sport and gender identities: Masculinities, femininities and sexualities, The dialectic relationship, in which identities are constantly shaped and reshaped, made and remade, presented and represented, engages with sport as a dynamic social and cultural force. The mutable nature of sport, of identity, and of the relationship between the two offers possibilities for resistance, contestation, and transgression of hegemonic gender and sexual power relations” (Aitchison, p. 1). Multiple iterations of masculinities and femininities are constructed in and through sport. The identities can affect the structure (game, team, league, competition, training session, audience) but also the structure can affect the ways in which masculinities and femininities are negotiated. The iterations of masculinities and femininities constructed in and through sport are a piece of a long sporting history: Identities are historically produced and consequently the structure of a social system (i.e. sport or a sport league) in a product of the past. Sport’s history as a masculine domain should be acknowledged when exploring gender and sport (Connell, 1987). Consideration of such will provide a deeper level of insight when investigating, analyzing, and theorizing sport and gender. In Heroines of Sport: The Politics of Difference and Identity, Jennifer Hargreaves (2000) discusses the struggles women face in sport. Cultural constructions of gender, what and how a woman “should” act, are often contrary to sport. Bodies that are aggressive, muscular, competitive (traditionally masculine descriptors) are athletic bodies. Therefore, to identify as a 44 female athlete challenges these ideologies. In the twenty-first century, a female athlete is an accepted identity; this is partly due to increased presence of females in the masculine domain over time. Even so, when one identifies or is identified as a female athlete the “female” is emphasized. Her difference from the norm (male) is pointed out and therefore made central to the identity (Hargreaves, 2000). Lindsey Mean and Jeffrey Kassing (2008) explore the problematic nature of female identities in “'I Would Just Like to be Known as an Athlete:' Managing Hegemony, Femininity, and Heterosexuality in Female Sport.” Throughout interviews with 20 professional female athletes, three predominant themes emerged (a) managing gender, (b) doing athletic identity, and (c) doing female athletic identity. The hegemonic structure of sport is described in one player’s words: But we still, they still want to prove their point. They still want it to be normal for men to play and different for women to play. When it stops being different and novel then we will have gotten somewhere. You know so it’s still evolving (p. 134). So while leaders in the women’s sport movement, such as former Women’s Sports Foundation (WSF) executive director, Donna Lopiano, proclaim, “today female athletes are not the exception but the rule” ( Smith, 1998, p. xvi) – such rhetoric glosses over the player’s quote above which suggests that the identities of female athletes are still being constructed against a sporting “norm.” This is not to take away from the incredible amount of advocacy organizations such as the WSF have done to increase sport opportunities for girls and women as well as empower females to play sports. However, a critical analysis of any movement can improve its impact. Leslie Heywood (2007) recognizes the good work of the WSF but also presents an insightful critique. She suggests that the WSF’s program GoGirlGo!, for example, reproduces an economically-driven discourse surrounding empowerment and success. She reads the GoGirlGo! campaign’s marketing materials through the lens presented by Hardt and Negri (2000) in Empire. That is, she sees “girls as the ideal subjects of Empire, part of the new global economy that relies on individuals with flexibility who are trained to blame their inevitable ‘failures’ on themselves rather than the system their lives are structured within” (Heywood, 2007, p.104). Heywood sees the WSF as suggesting that girls can control their own destiny through participation in sport. If they do not play sport, they do not succeed and they are responsible for those failures. Also 45 problematic, is how the WSF equates sport participation with success through statements such as, “girls and women who play sport… will learn the critical skills to be successful in the workplace” (p. 107). This statement attempts to produce a girl with an identity containing a problematic definition of success. If girls are taught that “‘success’ means successful participation in the corporate world and consumer economy then society will continue to become a sea of subjects which celebrates consumerism, wealth, status, and power; and sport aids in the production of such a society. Heywood’s critique is important in that is provides insight on how female athleticism can contribute to problematic but widely accepted social systems. Another feminist scholar, Judith Butler, critiques socially produced ideas surrounding identity and gender with her conception of gender performance, a concept that lends itself to the discussion of sporting identities. Gender performance, identity, and sport. The performance of gender occurs on the tennis court, soccer field, hockey rink, boxing ring, aerobics floor, and elliptical machine. As bodies train, practice, exercise, and compete they are implicated in reiterative acts, rituals, “embedded in the flow of everyday life” (Denzin, 2003, p.8). It is reiterative acts such as these that “as with other rituals become gendered and over time are taken for granted” as the given norm (Butler, 1990, p.40). In this vein, Butler understands gender to be “performatively constituted by the very ‘expressions’ that are said to be its results” (p. 25). We might say that gender performance is a kind of discursive loop that creates a socially constructed idea of what it looks like and means to be feminine, masculine, woman, or man, continually reinforcing itself as it repeats and replicates itself. Butler contends that sex and gender are not separate or natural but are both social constructions. This occurs as discursive practices gain “authority to bring about what it names through citing the conventions of authority… to the extent that it is ‘cited’ as such a norm” (Butler, 1993, p. 13). In effect, sex roles and gender norms are gender performances – unconscious, reiterative acts. Gender performativity in sport is evident, especially on female bodies in sports considered masculine. Notions of masculinity as they relate to ice hockey and how those ideas intercede on the bodies of female hockey players is the focus of Nancy Theberge’s (2000) ethnographic study of the “Blades,” an elite Canadian women’s ice hockey team. Some players on the team describe the ways in which they use “protective camouflage of feminine drag,” that is, making a special effort to appear feminine: “Let’s say I have to go to a hockey conference or 46 anything regarding hockey, I make sure I look really feminine when I'm off the ice because I want to show that I can be lady like and I want to be kind of accepted. You've probably seen it in women's hockey, there's a lot of girls that do act like man. I just don't want that image” (Theberge, 2000, p.87). Women such as those in Theberge’s study choose what gender to enact, their selection is a gender performance. Their choice to perform a gender may not have been a fully conscious act nor was their gender performance likely contemplated. It is through reflections and conversations brought forward through such qualitative inquiry that the unconscious performance is recognized. The sport of boxing is another traditionally masculine sport in which women compete. Christine Mennesson (2000) discusses women who cross that invisible gender line of athletic property in her article “'Hard' Women and 'Soft' Women: The Social Construction of Identities among Female Boxers.” Through participant observation and in-depth interviews of a sample of female boxers and their coaches, she finds that these boxers “by definition, challenge the existing gender order; but also reinforce the status quo by displaying traditional modes of femininity” (Mennesson, 2000, p. 21). The boxers report intentional 'feminine' dress and behavior when outside the ring. Some describe almost a dual gender personality dependent upon their surroundings. The modes are both “hard and soft” forming an identity that is “social and sexual.” One boxer relays, “I have to say that in the ring you must not be too feminine...To be efficient I'd almost say that you have to be a man, have a man's psychology... It feels strange for me to say that” (Mennesson, 2000, p. 28). Social pressure also affects the gender performance, “You have to be a bit feminine so for evenings out I dress up as a woman – my (male boxing) friends appreciate it” (Mennesson, 2000, p. 29). The fear of being unfeminine is recognized by self and others, “In the beginning they disapproved of my masculine walk and swearing. Now I watch myself, I work at taking care of my appearance. I'm glad to be identified as a woman” (Mennesson, 2000, p. 29). But where and how does one 'learn' to dress and walk like a woman? What does that even mean? More specifically, where and how does one learn to play sports “like a man” or “throw like a girl? And when did these concepts become dichotomous? Iris Young explores “feminine” styles of movement in Throwing like a Girl (1980). She questions Erwin Straus's (1966) 'biological' explanation for why girls throw different from boys, which he states is because girls are 'feminine.' Straus's statement is evidence of Butler's argument regarding the social 47 construction of sex and gender. Using the writings of de Beauvoir, Young challenges the place of “woman” in society; culturally and socially woman is defined as Other. “Woman” is “the inessential correlate to man, a mere object” (p. 43). As the Other, Young acknowledges how female bodies move differently than male bodies – more self-consciously and even constrained. In performing a physical task the woman's body carries her toward the intended aim, but often not easily and directly, but rather circuitously, with the wasted motion resulting from the effort of testing and reorientation, which is a frequent consequence of feminine hesitancy (Young, 1980, p. 147) These ‘hesitant’ performances are displayed by sitting cross-legged or 'throwing like a girl,' and can be contrasted with “boxing like a man” and donning “feminine drag” outside the rink or ring. The bodies within those particular spaces exaggerate the contradictory nature of sex and gender and contribute to socially constructed gender performances. In a similar fashion, feminist scholar Holly Thorpe (2009) discusses how female snowboarders negotiate their gender in the male-defined symbolic structure of snowboarding (p. 495). As they participate alongside their male peers, female borders may traverse the gendered space by, “riding fast, keeping up with the boys, and dismissing ‘boy talk’ that sexualizes and degrades ‘other’ women” (p. 498). To solidify their female snowboarder identity, they might demonstrate physical prowess and commitment, and ignore symbolic violence (e.g., boy talk). The extent to which they display skill and talent and the longer they remain in a certain group or field of boarders, the less their gender is seen as a hindrance. But upon entering a new field (be it mountain, competition, or workplace) gender negotiation is again a barrier to be navigated. In different ways, gender interacts with boxing, hockey, and snowboarding. Both women’s boxing and women’s hockey are sporting spaces whose mere existences challenge ideologies regarding masculinity and femininity. A female snowboarder riding alongside male boarders also challenges a space characterized by risk and physical prowess. In addition to the sociological categories constructed in and through sport, these spaces also actively organize and even order bodies according to gender. The physical organization of bodies may be done intentionally or not; gendered bodies may be segregated or integrated. These orders may be based on tradition or they may challenge societal norms and embedded structures – consciously or unconsciously. There are “women-only” and “men-only” sports, which some argue not only reinforce but also exacerbate gender binaries (McDonagh & Pappano 2008; Williams, 2003). 48

Others point to the extent in which segregation or integration may empower a certain gender (Anderson, 2008; Hardin & Dodd, 2006) In and among these spheres individuals take part in cultural practices; they walk, talk, dress, and move in certain ways that depicts culture and often gender. Exploring gendered sporting practices can provide further insight on gender performance and the ways in which gender is negotiated and constructed. The organization of bodies is a practice in itself. Further within, these gendered spaces cultural practices are performed by individuals that comprise institutions; the practices are socially constructed elements that collectively producing meaningful sites of culture. Practices. Cultural practices manifest when the social becomes physical. That is, when ideas, ideologies, beliefs, and values become concrete demonstrations or actions. It is where space and identity intersect to create a physical/tangible example of culture. Stuart Hall explained cultural practices as “the active process—which is at the same time the process through which men make their history” (1980, pp. 62). He goes on to conceptualize practices as human praxis, that is, activity through which theory is displayed. An example of a practice/praxis is seen in Michel Foucault's theoretical notion of “technologies of the self”—these are devices/techniques which make possible the social construction of personal identity (Foucault,1988). Technologies of the self may be a certain practice, piece of clothing, even a tattoo – which serves to represent a certain identity. Often technologies of the self are used to discipline one’s body or improve one’s image. In sport, Amanda Jones and Cara Carmichael Aitchison (2007) observe women and the ways in which technologies of the self manifest in spaces such as triathlons. The researchers relay life stories of female athletes that detail practices including controlled eating, training routines, clothing selection, and equipment use; each practice is used to further identify and be identified as a triathlete. The authors "suggest that triathlon practices both function as technologies of power and also operate transgressively as technologies of the self" (p. 71). In this example, Foucault's idea of “technologies of the self” is displayed through sporting practices, such as controlled eating or routine training. It is important to note that cultural or social practices are common forms of human activity (Hall, 1980). They are widely accepted manifestations of culture and identity. Gendered practices exist at many levels. In the media, representations of female sporting identities are seen in mediums such as Runner's World (RW) magazine's “Women's Running” column. Marie Hardin and Julie Dodd (2006) critically analyze the existence of such a column 49 and its content. On the surface, such a column may seem to further the cause of female athleticism; it recognizes women as runners and gives voice to female running writers. But a critical analysis may conclude that a separate women's running column suggests that men's and women's running differ. Further, one may conclude that the general content of the magazine is directed toward the norm, a male runner. Thus, there is a need to designate a portion of the magazine to the Other (female runners). Hardin and Dodd acknowledge this radical feminist critique, a critique which supports RW’s explanation for the discontinuation of the column after six years (1994-2002). According RW, the decision followed the magazine's philosophy that “female runners have the same values as those served by the general readership (read: men). Women runners are interested in reading the same types of articles as men or they wouldn't be reading the magazine” (p. 108). Therefore, Hardin and Dodd ask, “Did the 'Women's Running' column have any value for RW readers?” (p. 108). A content analysis of the column between 1999 – 2001 revealed reoccurring themes often related to relationships and body image. Through their analysis, the researchers concluded that the column provided a “safe space for female runners, a unique place where women's sports values were validated, cherished, and celebrated, where females counted fully” (emphasis in original, p. 109). This analysis is in a similar vein as Michelle Donnelly's (2012) work on women's onlyness in sport. During four years of ethnographic research, Donnelly problematizes the contemporary view of women onlyness in women's roller derby (as well as women-only home improvement workshops). According the Donnelly (2012) the project contrasts the dominant approach to women onlyness in the literature which characterizes the practices as natural, essentialized, and assumed. She finds that the participants constantly work to “'win space' for themselves in traditionally male-dominated and masculine defined activities and settings... (The women) make meaning of their involvement in these women-only leisure activities. (They) produce women onlyness gender regimes in the ways they make time and space for and gender mark these activities, and in social interactions with each other, men, and other women” (p. iii). Donnelly concludes that this intentional production supports the notion that women-only spaces are not natural but can contribute to women's empowerment. 'Natural' roles of men and women are deconstructed in “Separating the Men from the Moms: The Making of Adult Gender Segregation in Youth Sports” (Messner & Bozada-Deas, 2009). Utilizing interviews and participation observations, Messner and Bozada-Deas explore the 50 gendered division of volunteer in youth sport: Men as coaches and women as 'team moms.' They state: “While most participants say the divisions result from individual choices, the interviews demonstrated how gendered language, essentialist beliefs, and analogies with gendered divisions of labor in families and workplaces naturalize this division of labor” (p. 49). Further, observations revealed that patterns within informal interactions channeled men into coaching and women into being “team moms.” Male coaches interviewed reported never having a “team dad” as opposed to a “team mom” and even laughed at the idea. They cited societal norms of women as housekeepers and men as leaders in business, family, and sport. This example of gendered language organizes and orders bodies in sport: Male bodies as leaders, female bodies as support. Gendered practices such as these reinforce problematic ideologies that may unconsciously limit sporting bodies. Practices of segregating and integrating genders in sport have taken place throughout time, across age groups and sport. Both segregation and integration have been rationalized as 'natural' and safe as the previous review of literature has demonstrated; others contest both segregation and integration. The following section further discusses this debate. Gender and sport segregation and integration. As children, one of our first experiences in sport comes in school through physical education. In this sport space youth are both integrated into and segregated by gender. Lisa Hunter (2010) examines the social space of one physical education class using theoretical concepts put forth by Pierre Bourdieu. Collectively, concepts such as field, habitus, and capital help explain how bodies are constructed and negotiated in and through spaces like PE class. The bodies come to embody representations of culture such as 'the good student,' 'the good body,' and 'hetero/sexism.' Both the integration and segregation of gender at different times further these cultural and ideological constructions. At a young age, Hunter observes how girls and boys are separated for fitness tests in a manner that reinforces a dominant order of masculinity over femininity. In addition, lining up students according to test results (highest to lowest) displayed the bodies as physical capital differentiated and ordered by gender. These types of social sporting spaces may help explain the assumptions of the men interviewed by Eric Anderson in his project regarding coed cheerleading. Anderson interviewed collegiate male cheerleaders who had previously played football at an elite level in high school. The men discussed their perception of females before and after their time as a teammate of 51 women. Reoccurring themes in the interviews were expressed with statements such as, “I didn’t appreciate women as athletes before…women can handle a lot and they are not as fragile as I thought…. I never understood women until they were my teammates” (p. 266). Additionally, the male cheerleaders pointed out how they observed great leadership qualities and coaching abilities that they had not witnessed nor even thought existed among women. In this space gender integration seemed to diminish gender binaries. Female cricket players in United Kingdom had a different experience in Philippa Velija and Dominic Malcolm’s (2009) project titled, ‘Look, it's a Girl’: Cricket and Gender Relations in the UK. Organizational reforms in the UK have attempted to increase the number of females playing in cricket. These formal reforms have not been successful. Velija and Malcolm explored the lack of change through interviews with female cricket players on mixed-sex teams. Both girls and women were interviewed; it was the adult women who relayed the most explicit struggle with ideological barriers surrounding cricket. For example, when buying equipment to play, one female player described subtle patronization: I was trying on a pair of shoes, which is hard because I have small feet, so I found a pair and asked to try them on. The guy said, ‘are these for your brother?” I said, ‘no they are for me.’ He was like, ‘oh but they are cricket shoes you know?’ I was like, ‘yes, I know’ (p. 635). More concrete marginalization occurred after the merger of a men’s and women’s team. The female players on the team reported that repeated requests for representation on the governing board, equal playtime, and a female coach ‘fell on deaf ears.’ This system of power reinforced the women’s position as outsiders in the sport. Cricket may be likened to American characterizations of football, ice hockey, or boxing – all sports gendered “masculine.” In the United States, soccer’s gender is less defined. At the youth level girls and boys play soccer at equal rates. Throughout high school and college, females participate in soccer on a large scale. And while it is ‘acceptable’ for females to play soccer as girls, young women, and even as adults, understanding the performance of gender in soccer spaces may tell a more complicated story.

Theorizing Women and Soccer

The majority of academic research on women's soccer relates to physiological and psychological aspects of sport: performance level (Gabbett, 2008; Mohr, 2008), injury (Arednt, 1995; Faude, 2005; Mihata, 2006) and nutrition (Abood, Black, & Birnbaum, 2004; Reily, 2003) are among the topics most often addressed. Less has been written about women’s soccer from a sociological perspective, and many studies that do exist focus on the sport outside the United States, especially in China (Hong, 2003), Australia (Hoare, 2000), and South Africa (Pelak, 2010). Within the academic discourse on women's soccer in the United States, sociological and cultural research addresses contemporary issues such as media representation, gender dynamics, and the phenomena of soccer moms. Soccer moms. In the 1990s, the term “soccer mom” became a culturally and politically charged phenomenon. The rise of youth sport, further growth of suburbia, along with increased awareness of women’s interests, all contributed to both pop culture's and political candidates' attention to a certain category of females. On the surface, soccer moms are defined as “suburban women between the ages of 32 and 50 who have children under 18 and work at least part-time” (Macfarquhar, 1996, para. 17). The group became known as a set of swing voters who some maintain clinched Bill Clinton's election to the presidency in 1996 (Carroll, 1999). Further, the media outlets designated 1996 as “The Year of the Soccer Mom” and American Dialect Society voted "soccer mom" Word of the Year for 1996 (NPR, 1996; Worland 1998). Politically, soccer moms were said to be defined by the needs and interests of their children. Therefore, Clinton's attention to issues such as school uniforms, teen curfews, and enhancement of the Family Medical Leave Act were all said to lure “soccer moms” – translation: undecided voters (Carroll, 1999). Soccer moms were considered moderates (neither entirely liberal nor entirely conservative); therefore their votes were seen as up for grabs and were sought out by political candidates of both political parties. The term soccer mom was also used in local elections. According to Neil MacFarquhar (1996), "Susan B. Christopher may well have coined the first political usage during Denver's 1995 municipal elections with her slogan 'A Soccer Mom for City Council.' It was, she thought, a way of denoting herself as every neighbor" (para. 5). Much has been written about the “Soccer Mom” phenomenon as it directly relates to the politics of sport (Carroll, 1999; Swanson, 2009; Varvus, 2000). Mary Douglas Vavrus (2000), for example, critiqued what she analyzes as shift from “woman as political power” to “woman as 53 consumer.” Vavrus contrasts the cultural undertones of 1992 being known as “The Year of the Woman” with 1996 being known as “The Year of the Soccer Mom.” She saw women being homogenized and reduced to a consumer group with the “soccer mom” label; she concluded this sort of homogenized group as contributing to the increase of the gender gap. Participants in Lisa Swanson's (2009) project concerning soccer moms disagreed with Vavrus (2000) on some level. Interviews with 14 soccer moms revealed some perceptual disconnect between actual soccer moms (i.e., women who had kids playing youth soccer) and the label. In fact, many of the mothers (with soccer playing sons) that Swanson interviewed rejected the "soccer mom" label: [The "soccer mom" label is a] way to describe these crazy people who spend all their time and energy running around with their kids, with no life…It's interesting, because the soccer mom label I've never liked.... I always saw it as a mom that was pushing their kid.... Maybe to associate with a certain group of kids.... It [the label] has a negative connotation to it. (p. 350). Swanson's main focus was with soccer-playing children and social class. While the women rejected the term, she did find that most of them “used” soccer to distinguish themselves (and more importantly their families and children) as a part of an upper middle class community that raised “good boys.” Their involvement (and/or children's involvement) in soccer helped solidify social status. Media representations. In addition to soccer and social class, soccer's place in the mainstream media has garnered some academic attention. Media representation of soccer- playing women is an important portion this project's examination of the spaces, identities, and practices constructed within and through women's soccer. This is because forms of popular culture such as the media are “where we go to discover who we are” (Hall, 1992, p. 32). That is, identities, spaces, and practices are produced in discourses with pop cultural forms such as the media: They simultaneously influence and reflect one another. Therefore, I turn to the depiction of women's soccer in the media. Much of the academic research surrounding this topic is related to what is considered the largest women's sporting event ever held (Litterer, 2011): the 1999 FIFA Women's World Cup Soccer Final. In “She Shoots, She Scores” (2003), Helene Shugart assesses the media coverage of the 1999 women's soccer team. Through an analysis of mainstream newspapers, magazines, and 54 television she argues that “the mediated sexualization of the team and its members, manifest in ever subtler ways in order to accommodate increased popular consciousness of overtly sexist media practices, overshadows their athleticism and undermines their achievements,” (p. 7). To give but one example, Shugart observed that the majority of the coverage pictured the women in passive shots (as opposed to active images depicting athleticism). That is, there was a large portion of close-up face shots and specific coverage of players with long hair and considered physically attractive; U.S. players Mia Hamm and Brandi Chastain were two players who garnered the most media attention. Additionally, Shugart noted many instances when female athletes were heterosexualized by being defined by their connection to men as wives and mothers: Hamm and Chastain were classic examples of this: Hamm's status as the wife of a Marine pilot and Chastain's marriage to Santa Clara University's women's soccer coach were commonly referenced in even the briefest reports....Further, Carla Overbeck and Joy Fawcett, the two team members who had children at the time, were nearly always described as mothers in the media, often to the extent that that description eclipsed their athletic identities (pp. 16-17). The popular attention given to Chastain ultimately overshadowed all other players on and off the field (with the possible exception of Hamm and her large endorsement portfolio), particularly Chastain's actions following her game-winning goal in the finals. Chastain celebrated by taking off her jersey and running around the field in a black Nike sports bra. The baring of this “underwear sport equipment” started a media frenzy drawing as much commentary as her actual goal and even the team's victory. Jaime Schultz (2004) describes the incident as an “iconic sports bra moment” – one that contributed to the homogenization and normalization of feminine, heteronormative ideals. That is, the media's representation of Chastain's sports bra-bearing body sent messages about the feminine ideal. Messages surrounding the disciplined, athletic, (and breasted) female body as well as Chastain’s post-game act were discussed more than her soccer skill and performance during the game. The focus on her shirtless celebration as opposed to her athletic play contributed to the subordination of females and female sport which reinforce the traditional gender order. Although one interpretation of the media frenzy that followed Chastain’s bra reveal could be that, “the repeated publication of Chastain in her sports bra legitimized an athletic, strong, 55 active, and autonomous female form” (Schultz, 2004, p. 190), Schultz cites the media's eroticized portrayal of the event, which used language such as: “strip tease... peel down'... a strip down... a provocative gesture... a half Monty.... and the most brazen bra display this side of Madonna” (p. 191). Such phrases are not typically associated with soccer or athletes, but in these situations, the media chose to highlight and reinforce discourse focusing on sexuality not athleticism when covering women's sport. This popular discourse was among the media coverage analyzed by Messner et al (2003).The research team analyzed televised sports broadcasts during the summer of 1999 with specific attention to the coverage women's sports. A portion of the broadcasts fell during the aftermath of the U.S. victory in the 1999 Women's World Cup. As observed in the previous literature, Chastain's sports bra became a greater focus than the accomplishment of the team. Further, the stories humorously sexualized the incident so as to trivialize women as athletes. According to Messner et al. (2003), three days in a row, one sports broadcaster made joking references to the story, delivering the following 'reports': “the ponytail express stopped in Midtown Manhattan, where it was announced that Nike will exploit Brandi Chastain’s strip tease by fashioning her to a line of sports bras; the women soccer players’ ponytail express appeared in a golf tournament; and Chastain managed to keep her shirt on but took off her sweater during warm-ups” (p. 42). This type of gendered commentary contrasts with others' ideas about the dominance and 'normality' of soccer-playing women. Gendered soccer. For some, the growth and popularity of women's soccer in the United States is an example of “American exceptionalism” (Markovits & Hellerman, 2006). Women’s soccer is considered exceptional when compared to the level of talent and status of the sport in other countries as well as the marginalization of men's soccer in the United States, behind sports such as football, baseball, basketball, and hockey. According to Markovits and Hellerman (2006) Nowhere else is women’s soccer the cultural equivalent of – or even superior to – the men’s game, as it is in the United States. Where else would women players be much better known to the general public than men? After all, July Foudy, Mia Hamm, Brandy Chastain – to mention but three stars – are more widely recognized than their male equivalents in the United States, be they of the Alexi Lalas or the Landon Donovan generation (p.14).

The authors go onto to analyze the story of women's soccer in the United States, pointing to other examples of women's soccer's status (such as the use of women as color commentators for the 2002 Men's World Cup). The story of women's soccer in the United States includes overlapping milestones at recreational, high school, collegiate, and professional levels. Written during the short tenure of the WUSA (the first U.S. Women's professional soccer league), Markovits and Hellerman use the league to solidify their argument for the way in which women's soccer has transcended America’s hegemonic sports culture (which does not include soccer). That is, “with American football, baseball, basketball and ice hockey completely covering the male-dominated sports space of the United States, the women succeeded in a niche that remained unoccupied by the men” (p. 26). The mere presence of women in such as space seems to equate to phenomenal progress. As an aside to their case for women's soccer as an example U.S. exceptionalism, the authors do acknowledge that women “still have a very long and arduous road in their journey towards complete equality with men” (p. 27). A challenge to the idea of U.S. exceptionalism comes from Henry and Comeaux’s (1999) ethnographic case study of an American coed soccer league. Following scholarship on soccer as a representation of the suburban white middle class (Andrews, Pitter, Zwick, & Ambrose, 1997) and perceived achievement of gender equity in soccer in contrast to sports such as football and baseball (Sugden & Tomlison, 1998), the authors problematize the ideology of egalitarianism between men and women in coed soccer. An examination of formal and informal structures in the league suggested, “the provisions aiming at equity (in the league) are countered in part by male dominance (Henry & Comeaux, 1999 p. 287). The structures included: requiring a minimum number of females on the field (no minimum for men); assigning a higher weight for a women's goal (worth two points as opposed to one point for men's goals); and a prohibition on slide tackling (aids in the reduction of dangerous physical contact). The results of these structures did not equate to egalitarian play; there were fewer women in the league, they scored fewer goals, and were injured seriously just as often as men. Therefore, the authors concluded, American soccer may be considered an egalitarian game, not because is treats men and women equally but because it is a place where equality is negotiated. The negotiations women withstood in Jacques Henry and Howard Comeaux’s (1999) project support Michael Messner’s (1988) claim regarding women's participation in sport as a “contested ideological terrain” (p. 198). For females to play a traditionally all male sport such as 57 soccer comes with challenges and their gender difference is noted. That is, as Henry and Comeaux (1999) observed, gender is negotiated formally, informally, consciously and unconsciously. Recognizing this social process, Sally Cole Mooney (2006) analyzes the culture of girls’ soccer. She argues that “girls’ soccer is a radically different game from boys soccer; despite the 1999 Women's World Cup victory and Title IX rules soccer girls represent a “dunning down” of male flamboyance” (p. 233). To support this argument, she compares the dress, style of play, and hair of female soccer players to those of their male counterparts. Mooney notes the way in which male soccer players reject norms by wearing ponytails, hair bands, and, dreadlocks, whereas female players are marked by their lack of adornment with hair pulled into ponytails, in plain elastics, no makeup – only sunscreen and chap stick. Additionally, she posited that the style of play differs between men and women, noting that in matches between men and boys, shirt- pulling and repetitive fouling is commonplace whereas, among girls, fouling is considered a “loss of control.” In contrast to the distinctive styles of play and dress, Mooney discusses “soccer language” as a unisex lexicon, noting girls’ use of short phrases/commands (a communication style she notes is often characterized as masculine), including: “Push up!” “Clear!” “Switch!” and “Man On!” or “Man!” These bold imperatives differ from tones of indirections and subtlety often associated with habits of female speech (i.e. disclaimers, commands phrased as questions). But it is in these bold imperatives that Mooney sees an empowering example of female athleticism. Each of the works discussed above theorize women and soccer from various perspectives. In the next section, I present the perspective from which I theorize women's experiences in a coed soccer league. The following explains the social, cultural, political, and intellectual development of academic fields from which this project is informed.

Toward a Feminist Physical Cultural Studies

The previous review of literature lays a foundation for the epistemological and empirical approach in my exploration of women’s experiences in coed sport. In the tradition of Silk and Andrews (2011), I offer an addition to the burgeoning field of Physical Cultural Studies (PCS) with this dissertation. Building on the work of scholars from and the intersections of sport sociology, cultural studies, feminist cultural studies, and physical cultural studies, I suggest in this dissertation a theoretical approach moving toward a Feminist Physical Cultural Studies.

Epistemologically, this project is intentionally framed around the lived experiences of women and the negotiation of their bodies. It stems from a research tradition that prioritizes lived experience, thick description, and variation in interpretation because through such lived experiences both the researcher and her participants are exposed to a multiplicity of experiences (Berry, 2011). As such, this project is driven by a collaborative relationship between the participants and researcher. Together, the researcher and participant-collaborators are all immersed in a space of physicality (a coed soccer league); alongside one another we (researcher and collaborators) reflect and attempt to move toward social change as it relates to our 11 experiences in sport. Empirically, my project pushes beyond sociological research on women’s sport, combining concepts, theories, and methods from both cultural studies and sociology with an emphasis on the physical. My focus on the physical (bodies, movements, practices, spaces, signs, symbols) and cultural (ideologies, identities, beliefs, values) experiences of women in sport contributes to the field of PCS by adding a feminist dimension. That is, I see the world through the eyes of a woman, I participate with women, and discuss the physical and cultural elements of their experiences playing coed soccer. This is one element of my feminist project. In addition I seek to partner with my participants, challenge dominant ways of thinking, and bring out social change through the challenges. Among our goal are collaboration, open-mindedness, equality, and inclusion. To effectively present my case toward a Feminist Physical Cultural Studies, I begin by providing a brief explanation of Cultural Studies with specific attention to Feminist Cultural Studies. Next, I turn to the development of Physical Cultural Studies: I discuss the “physical” in PCS as well as provide scholarly examples of Physical Cultural Studies. Finally, I discuss how my project contributes to this field through its invocation of a feminist lens or orientation.

Cultural Studies

Born of postwar movements surrounding politics, economics, and education, British Cultural Studies (BCS) emerged as a project concerned with ordinary lives/living; it did not highlight anomalies, the rich, or famous. Instead, those in the field explored routine acts of the masses: Television watching, morning commutes, and workplace dynamics are among the

11 These elements help shape the Feminist Physical Culture Studies project. 59

“ordinary” practices it rediscovers. The “masses,” or working classes, are the “ordinary” people whose everyday practices, politics, and circumstances are of interest within cultural studies. Following the major wars of the 20th century, Britain’s working class began to garner more attention on account of its unorthodox political views. Specifically, academics and critical minds of the time began to question middle and working class ideals and political alignment (Turner, 2005), and why these segments of the country began to shift support toward a more conservative agenda that celebrated free markets, wealth, and hierarchical economic systems (which, in effect, meant they were voting against their own economics interests). Members of the middle class and academics, such as Richard Hoggart, Raymond Williams, Stuart Hall, Dick Hebdige, and Paul Willis, used their positions in education to write, study, and bring to light cultural systems that brought about these changes in class politics. The scholars penned texts such as The Uses of Literacy (Hoggart, 1958), The Making of the English Working-Class (Thompson, 1966) Culture and Society 1780–1950 (Williams, 1966; first published in 1958), and The Long Revolution (Williams, 1975; first published in 1961). Works such as these are considered to be the foundation of British Cultural Studies (Turner, 2005). The theorists individually drew from philosophers such as Karl Marx, Ferdinand de Saussure, Louis Althusser, and Antonio Gramsci and their ideas of determinacy, language, and hegemony. Driven by the political impetus to better locate, and thus problematize, the class politics of everyday British life, these early figures were guided by literary criticism and cultural Marxism: the field questioned political, economic, and educational structures in the hope that, through the popular education of the adult working class, “a genuinely socialist democratic society could be created…as a form of political struggle” (Carrington, 2001, p. 277-278). They studied the ordinary and the everyday, because in our most natural states we are most cultural (Willis, 1979); that is, the meanings and practices embedded in our everyday lives most often have the biggest impact on and reveal prevailing political dynamics. The advent of culture studies is intertwined with the rise of pop culture and its effect on 12 the education of children and adults alike. The gap between educators and their students widened as pop cultural influences such as music, art, and television infiltrated society. The ‘high culture’ of the educated and elite was not being embraced by the working class. Discussions

12 While pop culture was an impetus and an aspect of cultural studies research, CS is not primarily concerned with pop culture. Communication, living conditions, and everyday experiences are among the broad categories of inquiry CS research reaches. 60 regarding the state of youth and adolescent education were also an important element of the movement. Graeme Turner (2005) points to the “cultural development of the schoolchild (as the) battleground, defended by the 'civilizing' objective of the education system but assailed by the illicit pleasures pop culture” (p. 36). Debate over what is best for a child and how to best educate proper citizens were heard in conferences such as the 1960 National Union of Teachers (NUT) conference, titled “Popular Culture and Personal Responsibility.” The conference addressed the crisis surrounding how to make sense of the pop culture phenomena and negotiate its place in education. There seemed to be no existing strategy to understand what was happening in the world. In an effort to invent such a methodology, members of the working class by birth and elitists by trade (university instructors) came together to study, write, and discuss phenomena. Works such as Communications (Williams, 1962) and The Popular Arts (Hall & Williams, 1967) demonstrated the need to combine an “elite method of analysis and a democratic-humanist interest in the forms of everyday life” (Turner, 2005, p. 37). Scholars such as Hoggart, for example used his background in literary studies to analyze music, newspaper, magazines and popular fiction. In 1964 Hoggart founded the Centre for Contemporary Cultural Studies (CCCS) at the University of Birmingham, a significant research site in the development of cultural studies. As Dennis Dworkin notes in his study of cultural Marxism in Britain: Pioneered by Richard Hoggart, Raymond Williams, and Stuart Hall and extended by Hazel Carby, Paul Gilroy, Dick Hebdige, Angela McRobbie and Paul Willis among others, cultural studies has advanced critical understanding of the media, youth subcultures, literary production, contemporary working class. The cultural construction of gender, popular cultures, and the natures of ideology (Dworkin, 1997, p. 2). These scholars and their intellectual work contributed to the establishment and development of the field and the Centre. The CCCS's history is intertwined with theoretical and political debates; therefore, its exact history is not universally agreed. But germane to the field and Centre's intellectual development is the way in which the background and perspectives of intellectuals directly influenced it, both individually and collectively. Succeeding Hoggart, Raymond Williams directed the CCCS (Turner, 2005). Like his predecessor at the Centre, Williams' work was influenced by background, which included his working class upbringing, movement into the middle class through education and military service, and experience as an adult educator. His pupils were within a class that did not 61 matriculate through the education system normally. That is, as children or adolescents some did not complete the appropriate level of education or master certain skills. Therefore, they returned to school or sought educational opportunities as adults. This ‘atypical’ route through education was often the result of economic and political pressures. These forces influenced daily choices, routines, and eventually life course. Williams was interested in how this cycle was produced socially and culturally. He defined culture as “a set of practices/systems of meaning through which we learn the value, ideas, and beliefs (the ideologies) of the society in which we live” (Williams, 1985, p. 91). In Culture and Society, Williams connects cultural products with cultural relations—that is, the tangible with the intangible elements of society. The text spurred interest in a new and needed paradigm to study the world around them. Throughout Williams' work, critique and particularly literary criticism was a recurring theme. He looked to European Marxism and Structuralism when questioning the economic structures of society and later focused on forms of pop culture such as the Beatles craze, James Bond movies, and television (Turner, 2005). The advent and infiltration of television redefined mass culture. In Television as a Medium and Its Relation to Culture, Stuart Hall (1975) explores television's role in the dissemination of pop culture. He points out that television’s function does not focus on the broadcast of good/elite art (as some may wish it did in an effort to ‘educate’ the masses). Instead, television is a representational artifact of everyday culture, and everyday culture is influenced by television. A discursive relationship exists between television and everyday living. Ideas concerned with pop culture and communication were among the initial tenets central to Birmingham Centre for Contemporary Cultural Studies (CCCS). The Centre pioneered the development and integration of cultural studies into academia. This new theoretical strategy drew on existing ideas but brought a deeper understanding of the production of, and relationship between, forms of communication. Scholars sought to understand how meaning is generated and communicated. Language was one key principle in such an analysis. Following Swiss linguist Saussure, (many) cultural studies scholars suggest that truth is constructed through, by, and within language, and therefore it is impossible to conceive truth outside the limitations, inadequacies, and historical contexts of language (Newman, 2011; Saussure, 2002). Constructions of truth, language, and history all relate to forms of culture. In cultural studies, language in not limited to speaking or writing, but any movement, practice, formation, 62 characteristic, or object. These are all texts (signs, symbols, bodies) that articulate messages, whether consciously or unconsciously, each is meaningful. Hall saw language as comprised of relationships; it was not neutral or merely utilitarian, but contested and powerful (Turner, 2005). He insisted that modes of communication are not natural; prior to being sent, messages have to be constructed” (Hall, 1985). The process of sending and receiving messages is conceptualized as encoding and decoding. The terms were first used within cultural studies to describe the communication process in regards to television: A producer creates an image and encodes that image with an intended message; the image is then transmitted and received by a viewer who decodes or interprets it affixing his/her own meaning. The intended meaning and interpreted meaning may be similar or vastly different. Hall (1973) referred to this translation as the “margin of understanding” and used it to describe socially constructed meanings. The multiple levels of interpretation of soap operas were explored by Dorothy Hobson (1982) and David Buckingham (1987). The advent and popularity of soap operas is one example of contemporary society’s rejection of high culture and fascination with the “everyday.” Scholars such as Hobson and Buckingham focused on the audiences receiving and decoding the soap opera. An important element in this process was the feelings, attitudes, and beliefs of each audience member. Referred to as subjectivities, this notion considers that each viewer has his/her own history, beliefs, and values that create a contextual meaning. Collectively, they are known as one's subjectivities; and while often messy, the concept supports the complexity of humanity and society. An array of contextual elements influences the act of decoding. For Hall, the audience is not a passive recipient; the message intended by the sender is not always decoded uniformly. There are numerous texts in the home/world of the receiver and in that single message. The meaning of each text is the result of the interpreter's subjectivities: Following the reception of a text, a linkage is made between the image/sound byte to the person and meaning is assigned. That linkage is ‘made’ under certain circumstances such as types of things or people surrounding it or the time in history the message is delivered. The messenger and recipient also determine what meaning is produced. All of these cultural elements in discourse with one another is referred to as the theory and method of articulation. It is “how we know and come to create meaning” (Slack, 1999, p. 117). Articulating texts (these are images but also bodies, words, movements, signs, and symbols) are in constant discourse with one another: “Socially 63 produced groups of ideas or ways of thinking that can be tracked in individual texts or groups of texts” (Turner, 2005, p. 25). Hall recognized (following Althusser) that “no practice exists outside of discourse without reducing everything else to it” (Slack, 1999, p. 135). That movement/text/expression does not happen in isolation, but instead is a product of a historical and complex system. Referred to as “semiotics,” this complex system is comprised of representations through signifying practices: Gestures, dress, writing, and speech are among the signifying practices. A sign (be it shape, letter, color, smile, or sigh) is considered the smallest unit of communication. The meaning of each of these units, the relationships between them, and the effect they have on individuals comprises semiotics. The language used to construct the signs and symbols gives meaning to the semiotic system. Along with language, identity is considered a key conceptual category in cultural studies. Identity is articulated through language. Prior to cultural studies, explanations of identity were mostly confined to psychoanalytics. The psychological explanations were often experiment based, incorporating control variables and causal models. A cultural studies perspective of identity describes identity as a process but more importantly, a process without a finished product (Hall, 1996). Identities are fluid and influenced greatly by both everyday happenings/practices and historical forces (Carrington, 2009). Contextual and historical elements connected to a text are germane to a cultural studies understanding of identity. According to Grossberg (1997), “context is everything, and everything is context, a contextual theory of contexts” (p.7). Culture “is not something out there with which practices occur or which influence the development of practice. Rather, identities, practices, and effects generally, constitute the very context within which they are practice or effect” (Slack, 1999, p. 125). These and other influences of identity are unfixed, impermanent, and fluid (Turner, 2005). These changing histories often involve relations of power. Pondering ideas about power and culture led Hall to read the work of philosophers like Gramsci and Althusser. Critiques of politics and power led theorists like Gramsci to develop their theories relating to power. Gramsci wrote about the tactics in which politicians gained leadership and positions of power. He suggested that power lie in the masses and for leaders to convince the masses of their messages. Securing this type of force is much more effective than dominance or coercion. According to Gramsci (1972) revolutions occur in the suburbs – that is, a message accepted and adopted by the masses (i.e. suburbia) is a more successful operation of power than 64 coercion and domination. Known as Gramsci's theory of hegemony, examples of relationships involving power can be seen throughout history and today (think colonialism, racism, white privilege). Althusser drew from such political and economic philosophies but suggested equally as powerful is ideological hegemony. Concepts such as determinacy can also be applied to ideologies constructed in society. Reading both Gramsci and Althusser, Hall suggested that we use this understanding to study culture; be it politics, economics, socialization separately and/or in discourse with one another, hegemonic relationships exist and pointing them out is productive. Hall recognized Marx’s political theory, but stated that the social world is one “without guarantees.” That is while determinacy exists at some level, there also exist ‘ways out.’ These ways are often difficult to navigate, but do exist at different levels. Systems that reproduce subtle forms of oppression infiltrate societies past and present. Every day practices, manifested in and through forms such as language can reinforce systems of power, not by force or even hierarchical systems but by embedding messages that one group – race, religion, class, gender – is superior. These are among the hegemonic relationships operating in society. Specifically, hegemonic representations as it relates to gender can be critically analyzed throughout history. The “Feminist” in Feminist Cultural Studies. Early Cultural Marxist / Cultural Studies movements involved research on the social condition of women; among these projects were topics such as working class women, the Industrial Revolution, the history of women, and feminism as a utopian dimension. These works, penned by scholars such as Sally Alexander, Shelia Rowbotham, and Barbara Taylor, helped to recover the role and contribution of women in society (Dworkin, 1997). The inclusion of the condition of women into Cultural Studies discussions added a new dimension to the field; from these types of inquiries stemmed Feminist Cultural Studies. Like the history and development of British Cultural Studies, Feminist Cultural Studies within the British tradition evolved from various perspectives including women's studies, Marxism, socialist-humanism, literary criticism, and feminism. These theoretical lenses, at times, were layered with elements of culture such as race, class, and sexuality. Specifically, Marx's notions regarding class determinism (that is, the inability for individuals to transcend social classes) was adapted by some iterations of feminist cultural studies. That is, women felt like second-class citizens in relation to men and almost unable to transcend that class. In each, the experiences of women are explored through the various lenses and aspects of culture. Within a 65 cultural studies frame, a feminist perspective seeks to understand the ways in which meaning is produced in and through spaces, identities, practices, and social structures as it relates to those among the non-dominant groups. One such marginalized group were female-dominated audiences of media such as soap operas, romance novels, and magazines; they have been the focus of many projects in the tradition of British Cultural Studies (see Buckley, 1987; Hobson, 1982; McRobbie, 1991; Radway, 1983). These audiences were seen as subcultures; these audience studies sought to better understand how such forms of popular culture impacted/influenced women. They sought to understand why women were drawn to the plots of soap operas and romance novels (see Radway, 1983). Additionally, we saw scholars unpack the ways in which magazines and advertisements depicted “woman” as erotic and the “Other” (Williamson, 1978; 1986). Part literary criticism, part audience studies, these Feminist Cultural Studies projects provided a foundation for critiques of structures and representations contributing to the construction of values, beliefs, and ideologies of females and femininity. However, attention to women within the field of cultural studies was not always the case; the absence of women as subjects and researchers was among the impetuses for Women Take Issue (1978), a key text in the development of Feminist Cultural Studies. Women Take Issue was a collection of essays published by female scholars involved with the CCCS. Each essay approached different aspects of women and culture—some addressed the condition of working class women (McRobbie, 1978), others women as consumers of culture (e.g., Hobson, 1978), and still others the depiction of women in popular culture (e.g., Winship, 1978). Common throughout was the way in which the intellectual projects brought light to oppressive cultural practices. The essays became a political project and equally as important an epistemological project (Balsamo, 1991). Written from a women’s perspective, it became apparent that there are different ways of coming to know things that men may not experience. This not limited to a gender binary but includes the different perspectives and ways of knowing that come across when relayed via members of marginalized groups among classes, races, and religions to name a few. Through such essays in Women Take Issue, feminist scholars gave voice to a marginalized group: What finally made the CCCS let us do this book was not just that we had 'proved' ourselves in relation to our theoretical work on the economic level in our presentation; it also had to do with playing the tapes of women speaking about their lives as housewives, 66

a forceful demonstration of women's oppression, and of the political object of our intellectual work. (Bland et al., 1978, pp. 14-15) In speaking with, and writing about, women's lives, these projects revealed that a women's view of world brings different dimensions than the dominant discourse on key cultural issues (e.g., work, the division of work, gender roles, power, economic subordination, etc.). Therefore, the need to further investigate women's interpretations of lived experience became evident. In doing so, the essays in Women Take Issue “contributed to the development of an understanding of the articulation of sex, gender, and class in the organization of social relations and the disposition of power at a specific historical moment” (Balsamo, 1991, p. 53). That is, while grounded in different theories (Marxism, socialist-humanism, literary criticism, feminism, or others) each helped better understand culture through the social, political, and material conditions of women. Feminist Cultural Studies evolved in and through different theoretical frameworks, methodologies (contextual analysis, audience studies, ethnography), and even understandings of women's subordination—but the common thread among these various empirical strategies was exploration of women's condition and intention to explain hegemonic systems of power is consistent throughout. During different times, this agenda has both succeeded and fallen short of extending across racial and global divisions. In regards to race, some put forth a version of cultural studies with specific attention to black women. Black feminist cultural studies emerged in the 1980s (see Carby, 1987; Wall, 1989) and still brings new and different perspectives to the field at the intersections of gender and race. Black feminist cultural studies scholars argue that gaining equality for black women is a movement the cuts across race, class, and gender; that is, black women experience oppression based on each of these elements of culture. Foundational works such as “In Search of My Mothers' Gardens” (Walker, 1985) and “Black Feminist Thought: Knowledge, Consciousness and the Politics of Empowerment” (Collins, 1990) calls attention to the plight of the black woman and how it may differ greatly from the concerns of white women. From these works we have learned that “woman” is diverse. The issues facing middle class white women are not the same a those facing black women. In a similar vein, Black British Feminist Cultural Studies takes on a different perspective than cultural studies done on or by Black women in the United States. The contextual background of black women and really all women in each of these contexts is not the same. Building on this example, one can see how debates regarding the cross-cultural capacity of a 67 field such (British) Cultural Studies exist; for example, can BCS work be done in America or in rural Asian villages in the same tradition (Stratton & Ang, 1996)? The conditions in each of these areas throughout the world differ economically, politically, and socially. It is questionable whether or not one discipline can encompass each and every unique and complicated version of “woman;” hence the emphasis on contextualism in cultural studies. Although, in any case, in any country, viewing the world through the eyes of a women can help us better understand the condition of women. These multiple and sometimes overlapping versions of “woman” further the feminine perspective of cultural studies throughout the world, historically, and presently. Feminist scholars such as Angela McRobbie and Susan Bordo have brought attention to the cultural representations of women that contribute to their continuous marginalization and subordination. Among the most effective at challenging the orthodoxies offered by popular culture was McRobbie. Her feminist critiques expanded into forms of pop culture such as film, magazines (see, e.g., Feminism and Youth Culture [1991]). A reoccurring theme in these critiques was the depiction of the female body. Much of Bordo’s work has focused on eating disorders and how the construction of the female body in the media and then throughout culture furthers such debilitating conditions. In Unbearable Weight: Feminism, Western Culture, and the Body (1993), she writes “the rules of femininity have come to be culturally transmitted more and more through the deployment of standardized visual images.” She continues by arguing that cultural transmitters such as television and print media work insidiously to “impose models of bodily beauty that get construed as freely chosen options by those victimized by them” (p. 17). Contemporary Feminist Cultural Studies projects continue to focus on the female body but also fields such as technology including online communities/subcultures (Driscoll & Gregg, 2011) as well as youth culture and depictions of females in contemporary fiction (think Stephanie Meyer’s (2005-2011) character, Bella Swan, in the Twilight series or Suzanne Collin’s (2008) character, Katniss in Hunger Games) (Click, Aubrey, & Behm-Morawitz, 2010). In addition, as trends of globalization continue—cross-cultural explorations in Feminist Cultural Studies are being pursued (see Abu-Lughod, 2002; Hargreaves, 2007; Korteweg & Yurdakul, 2009). Discourses surrounding immigration, beliefs, customs, tradition, and gender throughout and across different countries and cultures are becoming prominent issues in law, religion, business, and sport (Korteweg & Yurdakul, 2009). The historically veiled female Muslim body has become more visible our world has become more globalized. Analyses such as “Do Muslim 68 women really need saving? Anthropological reflections on cultural relativism and its others" (Abu-Lughod, 2002) have ignited critical cross-cultural discussions surrounding the condition of 13 women. This post-9/11 piece challenges Western cultural norms as it relate to the veiling of women. It points out that the practice of veiling is done for different reasons across cultures, therefore should not generally be assumed as an oppressive act based on Western ideals. Traditions associated with religion such as Islam have also been explored within physical 14 cultural spaces. Turning towards sport, it is important to observe the ways in which ideas about femininity, specifically the female body, are produced. Scholars such as Jennifer Smith Maguire and Pirkko Markula have focused much of their work on the female body as it relates to sport, fitness, and exercise. Maguire writes about the fitness industry from a critical, socio-cultural perspective in Fit for Consumption: Sociology and the Business of Fitness (2007), where she discusses the ideas, values, and beliefs associated with associated with what is means to be fit as constructed in spaces such as fitness centers, group exercise classes, and among personal trainers. In a similar vein, Markula (2003) explores the ways in which physical activity contributes to (or takes away from) women’s empowerment (see The Technologies of the Self: Sport, Feminism, and Foucault). In a recent work, Women and Exercise: The Body, Health and Consumerism, Markula and Eileen Kennedy (2011) provide insight on female bodies and exercise as it relates to aging, weight (i.e. fatness), insecurities, and depictions of women in pop cultural forms such as magazines. One of the first feminist cultural studies / sport studies perspectives was seen in the work of Cheryl Cole (1993). Utilizing a feminist cultural studies lens along with Foucauldian theory, Cole explores female bodies in sport in “Resisting the Canon: Feminist Cultural Studies, Sport, and Technologies of the Body.” She understands sport as “a site through which questions related to social and political power, domination, ideology, agency, and transformative possibilities must be considered” (p. 77). Cole describes they relationship between women’s bodies and sport using Foucault’s concept of “technologies of the self” (discussed previously). That is, for women, sport

13 Abu-Lughod's piece has been referenced by hundreds of scholars, not only internationally, but across academic disciplines as well. 14 In “Sport, Exercise, and the Female Muslim Body: Negotiating Islam, Politics, and Male Power,” Jennifer Hargreaves (2007) similarly discusses the ways in which sport, religion, and cultural norms intersect on the female body and create meanings. 69 participation and exercise help construct an identity that attempts to reach a feminine ideal that encompasses an athletic, hard, slim, disciplined body. This ideology is powerfully disseminated through social and cultural modes (i.e. television, advertising, exercise videos). Foucault's ideas about the body and power lend themselves well to some versions of what would become 15 Physical Cultural Studies.

Toward a Physical Cultural Studies

Cultural studies' turn toward feminist theory emerged from a similar philosophy as Physical Cultural Studies and its shift toward the body. Cultural studies is concerned with everyday practices and the meanings embedded within in them; with this focus, naturally, the body becomes important. First, the body is the vessel into which a message is received and often through which a message is sent. Then, there is “body language” as a cultural representation as well as external elements of culture placed on the body such as clothes or hairstyle. The body uses cultural artifacts: Cars, technology and other commodities are pop culture icons. Most importantly, the body is a site of race, gender, and social class. Ethnicity, sexuality, and status are made visible through the body. Each of these ordinary aspects of everyday living can be explored to better understand culture. Through cultural studies' development, a shift took place from analysis of communication mediums (magazines, television), to the audiences that consume media, and then to specific groups of people or subcultures such as bikers, schoolboys, and housewives (Turner, 2005). Scholars such as Paul Willis took an ethnographic approach to study a subculture of working- class youths leaving school. In Learning to Labour: How Working Class Kids Get Working Class Jobs (1977), Willis presented three years of ethnographic research. He studied this population both as a group and individually through participant observation, group discussions, informal interviews and diaries. As part of his research method, Willis attended classes with them and

15 Alongside cultural studies evolved French feminism; a shared theme between the two fields is the production of power. Related to hegemony, another cultural studies' version of power follows French feminist philosopher, Michel Foucault (1977; 1980b). His explanation of power is in contrast to power viewed historically: It is not a “top down” or hierarchical power but power that moves laterally through society. Subjects are not overpowered through force but through the way power “traverses and produces things;” as he notes, “(Power) needs to be considered as a productive network which runs through the whole social body, much more than as a negative instance whose function is repression” (Foucault, 1980a, pp. 118-119). Foucault's interpretations of culture revolve around the human body. Through a cultural studies lens, bodies are texts, they articulate messages, and are in constant discourse with the world around them. Cultural identities such as gender, race, and class are displayed on and through bodies. Within and through this corporeal cross-section of culture, cultural studies focuses on the physical. 70 worked alongside them at their places of employment (Willis, 1977). In other words, Willis was 16 physically co-present with those he studied within this subculture. Questionnaires and Likert scales would not have captured the same type of intimate knowledge and understanding that 17 Willis obtained in his project. The female body and cultural world of women was also of interest during the 1970s. time. In 1971 the Boston Women’s Health Book Collective published a resource book for women, called Our Bodies, Ourselves. This was a key text in the women’s movement on account of its simplicity in conceptualizing selfhood and struggle. It included testimonies from “ordinary” women expressing a desire to not be pressured by an authoritative discourse. Testimonies often surrounded the body: I watch my daughter. From morning to night her body is her home. She lives in it and with it. When she runs around the kitchen she uses all of herself. Every muscle in her body moves when she laughs, when she cries…She knows when she wants to be touched and when she wants to be left alone… I sometimes feel she is more a model for me than I am for her. (p. 40) In this passage, it is through the body that which the mother comes to know herself and her daughter; the body articulates a deep layer of desire and social understanding. The insight gained through a focus enriches our understanding of the social world. While the passage above portrays a natural or private time and space, interpretations of the body in the public sphere have also been a focus of research. For example, consumptive practices and means of self-presentation can be seen on and through the body, specifically the moving body. Utilizing Foucauldian perspectives that recognize sets of cultural-industrial discourses and practices, Elizabeth Wilson (1994) points to a culture of fashion and beauty actively producing the modern body. Her analysis includes practices and consumption of aerobics, dieting, exercising, dance; these sites of moving bodies are all integral parts of contemporary culture and sites ripe for cultural analysis and critique.

16 Willis' physical immersion in the research space, intentional interaction with participants, and political agenda can be likened to a contemporary definition of Physical Cultural Studies as put forth by Giardina and Newman (2011). 17 The 'tools' attempt to capture one version of a reality at one point in time. This is in contrast to ethnographic strategy which privileges multiple realities and an interpretivist approach to research. 71

Analyses moving bodies constituting sport spaces can also bring new levels of understanding about the social world. The institution of sport is constituted by cultural practices and is too ripe for cultural analyses. Sport has a history and its history impacts how it is practiced today. Historically, sport has been an institution that has had the effect of disciplining the body (Hargreaves, 1987). Programs are designed (physical education, youth sport leagues, group fitness classes) to discipline the body. These programs simultaneously (sometimes directly, 18 sometimes indirectly) teach values and thus connecting a disciplined body to morality and clearly demonstrate how the body is simultaneously physical and cultural (Andrews, 2008b). Sport was addressed indirectly by key theorists during the early development of cultural studies. Williams equated the importance of football (soccer) in everyday culture to the prominence of opera and other forms of art characteristic of ‘high culture.’ Hoggart also recognized the social preoccupation with sport but chose to focus on other cultural practices. In the 1970s and 1980s the CCCS supported a number of papers exploring sport and leisure, mainly focused on football and hooliganism as well as sport and the media. Additionally, fringe sports such as kung-fu, billiards, skateboarding and squash were researched. Sport as it relates to women addressed at the 1974 Women in Sport symposium, organized by the University of Birmingham. This symposium was a part of the effort to diversify the subcultures which were often explored (i.e. working class men). The symposium was organized by physical education teachers at the University of Birmingham and resulted in the publication of key cultural studies texts regarding sport. The CCCS’s sporadic production of publication regarding sport eventually evolved into the adoption of the field at institutions of higher education (Andrews & Loy, 1993). Class, Sports, and Social Development (Gruneau, 1983), The Devil Makes Work: Leisure in Capital Britain (Clarke & Critcher, 1985), along with Sport in Social Development: Traditions, Transitions and Transformations (Ingham & Loy, 1993) were key texts in the establishment of the cultural studies of sport. The authors highlighted the ways in which sport contributes to the complexity of social development and discussed the theory of hegemony within sport. In the mid-1990s a feminist critique of sport and cultural studies emerged. There was a call for more research to explore gender and sexuality in the sporting domain. Scholars such as Jennifer

18 The YMCA directly infuses Christian values into their sport leagues for children while a group exercise class may relay themes obedience and work ethic as participants heed the instructor's motivational commands. 72

Hargreaves (1994) and Joseph Maguire (1994) answered this call through their investigations of female sporting bodies – their creation and reproduction. Into the twenty-first century, projects such as Understanding Lifestyle Sports: Consumption, Identity, and Difference (Wheaton, 2004), Sport Without Guarantees: Toward a Cultural Studies that Matters (Andrews & Giardina, 2008), Marxism, Cultural Studies, and Sport (Carrington, 2009) explore, question, and critique sport as a site of culture and embodied politics. These are each elements in development of a broader cultural studies project, while furthering the understanding of contemporary sport culture. Through recourse to Stuart Hall’s Marxism without guarantees and Lawrence Grossberg’s radical contextualism, this discussion advances an approach premised on, and seeking to both excavate and theorize, the contingent relations, structure, and effects of sport forms, an approach that could be characterized as a sport without guarantees (Andrews, 2002, p. 110). David Andrews’ later works (2008, 2010, and 2011) called for physical, critical, and cultural 19 approach to sport turning on the body. This call toward corporeality builds on the idea that a critique of the body which can lead to a critique of power relations in society (Hargreaves & Vertinsky, 2007). Doing Physical Cultural Studies. Much of today's research within the field of sport is too often driven by predictive ways of knowing as opposed to interpretive approaches to inquiry (Andrews, 2008a). Scientific hegemony is creating a field of replicated quasi-experiments and re-iterated versions of the same concepts. Academic disciplines such as sociology, humanities, communications and other social science fields are too often becoming isolated silos instead weighed down by narrow, repetitive modes of inquiry. Interdisciplinary collaboration and experimentation with different paradigms are not typically prioritized. These trends are in need of new ways of knowing. In an effort to explore the world of sport, recreation, exercise, and human movement from a different world, the field Physical Cultural Studies (PCS) emerges. Scholars doing work within the field of PCS choose not to fall in line with dominant capitalistic research and educational pursuits but instead question those systems and the bodies in those systems. In an academic climate defined by initiatives such as corporate lobbying certificates and motorsport management programs—there is a need to question the priorities of

19 Andrews' project keeps intact many of the tenets of British Cultural Studies (communication studies, contextual analysis, literary criticism, cultural Marxism) with a focus on the human body. 73 our research and educational institutions. To do this, PCS researchers enter these spaces and critique the existing political structures. This type of approach is aligned with Wendy Frisby's (2005) call for critical sport management research. In her Zeigler lecture, Frisby suggests that sport scholars have the ability to promote social change by investigating the exclusion of women and minorities from places of power and questioning systems that exploit athletes. She refers to such conditions at the “ills” of sport suggests critical sport management research to help ameliorate these injustices. The goal is to open up discussions that lead to nonrepressive forms of organizing. Research from this perspective explores alternative structures and arrangements in order to disrupt dominant discourses and established orders, and it has an action component designed to foster personal, organizational, and social transformation (p. 8). Scholars such as Newman and Giardina (2011) employ this approach in their book, Sport, Spectacle, and NASCAR Nation: Consumption and the Cultural Politics of Neoliberalism. Through participant observations, they physically immerse themselves in the world of stock car auto racing. They tailgate at races, compete in fantasy leagues, monitor message boards, blogs, and mainstream media covering NASCAR. They talk with fans and take in the cultural elements on display at the track. The two white men “blend” into the sea of fans, physically. Their bodies are purposefully placed in this cultural space, allowing them to come in contact with confederate flag waving, racist t-shirt wearing fans as well as staged Bush-era pro-oil political crusades in the name of the War on Terror. These spaces of culture are embedded with messages surrounding neoliberalism, race, and social class. This culturally complex project can be explained in “simple terms” according to Giardina and Newman (2011a): we study social bodies and the physical cultures often situated (by self or other) at the intersecting vectors of power, knowledge, and identity, mingling about those subject positionalities upon which power is either challenged or reaffirmed (in both real and imaginary ways – through bodily performance and praxis (p. 2). Situating themselves within this cultural space and interacting with other bodies in this space is exemplary of PCS. The approach differs in the way in which a more traditional sport management scholar may engage the project. A traditional sport management inquiry into the phenomena of NASCAR may likely include questionnaire distribution among spectators at an event. The data collected with the questionnaires would then be coded and statistically analyzed. 74

Relationships among defined concepts may be discussed in a very clear, succinct format, discussing interpretations such as, concept A significantly affects concept B. This traditional approach uses an objective, “unbiased,” third person approach to research. Alternatively, physical cultural studies projects such as Newman and Giardina’s (2011) ethnography of NASCAR incoporate the researcher’s subjectivity and are often written from a first person point of view. As in other key PCS texts, Giardina and Newman (2011) remind us that the researcher’s body is central to the PCS project. This form of participant observation, argues Donnelly (2009) “involves making and maintaining space for the researchers in the field: socially, culturally, and physically” (p. 4). Further, PCS embodies (British) cultural studies seeing bodies as texts articulating theory and method (Slack, 1999). In their article “What is the 'Physical' in Physical Cultural Studies,” Giardina and Newman (2011a) extend Andrews' (2008) call for PCS by “charting new axiological terrain,” and locating the “politics and praxis of research on the body” (p. 37). Within many positivist or post-positivist oriented projects, a researcher's ontology, epistemology, and axiology are an aside and sometimes even ignored. The field of physical cultural studies is an opportunity to use these axioms as strengths and stimuli for inquiry. The empowerment of a researcher’s own experiences gives agency to the social. Embodied experiences can be used by PCS researchers to make the social material. That is, intangible processes, thoughts, reflections, impressions, reactions, and interpretations can be more concretely analyzed on paper when a researcher sets out to internally and externally observe the world. His/her physical experience and “empirical evidence” can demonstrate social forces producing the culture of society. It is through the body and in human experience where the physical and ideological collide. Clearly, the body is a site of culture—politically, economically and powerfully. Therefore, it is imperative to begin and end PCS inquiries with the physical (Giardina & Newman, 2011a). Situated near but extending beyond traditional body work, Giardina and Newman (2011a): ... propose a Physical Cultural Studies that emerges not necessarily to fill a disciplinary gap, but rather as an intellectual meeting point, making use of both physical and intellectual praxis to ….articulate the human experience to and with these broader contextual forces (p. 39, emphasis in original). 75

The use of “messy self-reflexivity” allows PCS to go beyond textual analysis and into the psyche of athletes, performers, exercisers, dancers, actors, and movers. Self-reflexivity is a process involving personal and academic reflection in a lived experience in a way that reveals deep connections between the writer and his or her subject. “To be reflexive means to turn back on yourself the lens through which you are interpreting the world” (Goodall, 2000, p. 137). Reflexivity can shed new light onto familiar settings for both readers and researchers. A new perspective on blackness and football came from Carrington’s (2008) article “What is the footballer doing here?” The extent to which he embedded his own personal values within research brought home the lived experience of a black British athlete. Sport is an institution made up of living, breathing, articulating bodies. Entering the field of sport, physically – participating and collaborating with other sporting bodies can enhance one’s understanding of sport. In “What is the footballer doing here?” Carrington, as the researcher, is central to the piece: His body and within it, his thoughts and reflections, create a layered account of real life. Carrington articulates his own journey from value-free observations to self- reflexivity; after adding a personal diary to his observational field notes, eventually the separation between the two records blurred. The technique resulted in an award-winning autoethnography regarding race and identity on the cricket fields of Northern England. The rookie cricketer (though seasoned footballer) describes autoethnography as “the attempt to develop a reflexive account of the Self that opens up to critical interrogation of both the researcher’s own biography in relation to those studied and the very act of inscribing or narrating that ethnographic story” (Carrington, 2008 p. 426). This type of narrative approach is in contrast with traditional sport management research; it does not claim to be objective or unbiased, but instead—human. It is a personal account with evocative themes. While not deemed “generalizable;” it provides a different way of looking at sport and enhances understanding of an athlete’s experience on a team. The embodied research project does not attempt to simplify social relations but instead physically explore its complexity. Carrington's methodology is an example of the way in which: PCS (can) identify the role played by physical culture in reproducing, and sometimes challenging, particular class, ethnic, gender, ability, generational, national, racial, and/or sexual norms and differences” (Andrews, 2008a, p. 54).

Carrington's work is in line with Michael Atkinson (2011)'s definition of Physical Cultural Studies, who suggests that: Local, national, and cross-national analyses of how sport, exercise and physical activity may be contexts where social inclusion, health, safety, human rights promotion is evident and human physical, intellectual, artistic and moral potentials are supported without fear or prejudice (p. 139). The social movement element of PCS is critical. PCS scholars imagine the possibilities of critical research both informed and active. Michael Silk and David Andrews (2011) encourage research that makes a difference. Promoting social change through critical analysis of vehicles such as sport, exercise, and physical activity is possible. Physically engaged researchers give action and agency to sociological problems and solutions. PCS presentations at the 2011 North American Society for the Sociology of Sport (NASSS) conference were given much attention, marking a bit of a breakthrough at the field’s primary annual meetings. In three well-attended sessions that included fifteen presentations, interest was shown and discussions were generated surrounding Giardina and Newman’s (2011a) 20 call for embodied Physical Cultural Studies. I highlight three specific presentations given at the 2011 NASSS conference, which I contend are representative of a version of PCS that not only involves the physical immersion of the researcher’s body and interaction with participants but are also concerned with the conditions of marginalized groups; these projects shed light on issues of human rights. Further, these projects become emancipatory movements when they take action to improve lives of the oppressed. Such advocate/scholars doing this type of work include Ashleigh Huffman (2011), Shannon Jette (2011), Bryan Clift (2011); these individuals physically immerse themselves in their research and aim to improve to the conditions of marginalized communities. Social change is the impetus for Ashleigh Huffman’s (2011) work, Using Sport to Build Community: Service-Learning with Iraqi Refugees. Huffman works with sport management students at the University of Tennessee who enter the community and collaborate with Iraqi

20 Other presentations in the Physical Cultural Studies sessions included: “Tightening belts and B.E.E.F.-ing up”: Public Recreation and Neoliberal Urban Governance (Bustad, 2011); “It’s Supposed to be Pure”: Basketball, Whiteness, and the Hoosier Identity (Carey, 2011); Sporting a Skort: Materiality, Surveillance, and the Performance of Identity (Flanagan, 2011); Parkour: Towards postpost as performative aesthetics (Holmes, 2011); Politics of Embodiment: Ethnographies of Yogi Activists (Kauer, 2011); Balancing Act(s): Bodies, Politics, and Research in Baltimore (Mower, 2011); “Triathlon Culture: Identity, Community, Embodiment and ‘Mimetic Exhibitionism’ (Trotter, 2011) Ice Dance Reacts to the 2002 Olympics Judging Scandal: A Study of Embodied Practices (van Veen, 2011); Embodying ‘Healthy’ in the Fitness Club: Constructing Knowledge and Promoting Health/Exercise Literacy for the Citizen Consumer (Wiest, 2011). 77 refugees to provide sporting opportunities to the men, women, and children within this marginalized community. Through reflexive journals and interviews with the Iraqi refugees, social change occurs on both sides of the partnership. A collaborative partnership is built by Shannon Jette (2011) during her project, Dancing Mothers: Exploring Alternative Body Practices. Jette’s inquiry leads her to connect academia with social services and the private sector: She enters a women’s pregnancy center in Canada in an effort to learn more about how the center’s clients (expecting mothers) understand their pregnant bodies. The result is a series of liberating dance classes hosted by an acclaimed dance instructor for the mothers. Jette not only collaborates with the center and talks with the mothers, but dances alongside the women, reflecting on her own body in motion. Bryan Clift’s (2011) body is also in motion alongside participants in his project Running with Neoliberalism: Stewardship of the Homeless in Baltimore. Before sunrise, through the streets of Baltimore, Clift participates in a program for homeless men and women that uses running as a source of empowerment. Through stories, conversations, and mutual encouragement on morning runs, Clift learns about participants in the program and about himself through the lived experience and reflexivity. Be it coaching (Bush & Silk, 2010), playing (Carrington, 2008), or consuming (Newman & Giardina, 2011), sport studies can benefit from the theoretical, epistemological, and methodological foundations of PCS. Bodies are central to sport and central to PCS; bodies are gendered and the mere existence of female bodies in a masculine domain such as sport can challenge feminine ideologies and also create new social and cultural ideas about femininity. Sport is a multifaceted institution located in a culturally complex world. Physically entering these spaces brings a new perspective to the social groups within it. With special attention to female bodies and the condition women can bring new perspectives to sport and physical culture. A feminist focus and critical eye questions surfaces, norms, identities, spaces, and practices relating to gender. Delving below surfaces, not just observing or listening, but also self- reflexively analyzing women’s experiences in sport – in my case, as an adult female soccer player-research in a coed soccer league – arouses tensions, unearths power dynamics, and attempts to make the space more inclusive and empowering.

What is this Feminist in Feminist Physical Cultural Studies?

My project is an attempt to draw upon the best traditions of feminist scholarship, and feminist cultural studies scholarship in particular, to better position this developing PCS project, which I call Feminist Physical Cultural Studies (FPCS). Viewing the social world through a feminist lens leads to questioning dominant meanings and dominant ways of thinking. One way to do this is to consider 'places' of pre-meaning. Julia Kristeva (1980) describes this 'place' as a state before symbols have ideas attached to them (i.e. before pink was equated to femininity). Kristeva contends that socially constructed language can misdirect the understanding of signs 21 and symbols. That is, language attaches meaning to signs and symbols (whether accurate or not) and consequently the solidity of those definitions conditions individuals to thinking certain things; members of society are conditioned to attach certain meanings to certain symbols through language instead of independently interpreting the symbols without being influenced by language. According to Kristeva, the latter is more natural and possibly closer to a truth as compared to a language-infested world created through imbalances of power. I suggest that contemplating states of pre-meaning can help us better understand a world full of ideals and assumed dynamics of power. In an effort to critique widely accepted norms and systems of power, considering a state of pre-meaning can aid in crafting an intricate critique of the social world. When applying Kristeva’s philosophy in this exploration, I do not contend that Kristeva’s state of pre-meaning exists or even can exist, but I do maintain that when peeling back layers of the social, searching for a level of pre-meaning can lead to enlightenment. Such critical theories are grounded in an epistemology that does not seek finite, concrete goals or objectives but leaves room for subjectivity. That is, the “goal” is not to find an answer or one single truth but instead recognizes that society is a dynamic structure. Kristeva (1980) attempts to put forth a model to accommodate these dynamic social situations; It is a model where the meaning is not always given. That is, there is rarely one right answer, one solution, and one truth in any social situation. Individuals and society as a whole get into trouble when they rely on and/or continuously fall back on the “already said” (Barthes, 1989). The 'already

21 While Kristeva’s philosophy is often read in conflict with Butler’s notion of performativity (previously discussed in this chapter), my project is informed by both feminist scholars. In my examination of adult coed soccer I use both theorists to attempt to better understand the gendered sport space. I contend that both scholars challenge dominant ways of thinking and therefore can assist in my exploration. 79 said' can be likened to a supposedly universally accepted definition, idea, or belief. The 'already said' are ideas that when challenged immediately cause disruption. When one questions the 'already said' people or institutions are suddenly uncomfortable because their own beliefs – be them unconsciously assumed or intimately calculated are being contested. Bringing forth such a discussion may offend certain people or institutions. A heated debate or argument may arise when such norms are questioned. However, ultimately, it matters less, which 'side' is right or wrong but that intellectual and meaningful consideration was given to a subject producing a more informed, more aware public. Considering concepts such as pre-meaning and challenging the ‘already said’ comprise one layer of a feminist lens. Within another layer, feminism brings attention to gender. Specific to my project and aligned with feminism, I intend to disrupt norms and challenge widely accepted beliefs as it relates to gender. Throughout the waves of the feminist movement and to the present day – the feminist message has often struggled to come under one unifying theme (McQueen, 2012). However, one typically held foundation throughout its different phases or iterations is an opposition or challenge to patriarchy. According to Edward Schneier (1992) patriarchy is “the oldest, most basic form of domination; and thus, all other forms of exploitation and oppression (racism, capitalism, imperialism, etc.) are extensions of male supremacy” (p. 127). Further, women are not the only 'group' that experiences the effects of patriarchy. Men are oppressed by patriarchy, too. Patriarchy contributes to the oppression of bodies – be them female bodies, male bodies, homosexual, bisexual, black, or immigrant bodies to name a few. Therefore, feminist curiosity attempts to re-write or re-represent the definition of women (or of men, queer, disabled) as already constructed by a patriarchal society. Through feminism, one can explore the appropriate way of understanding and responding to patriarchy (McQueen, 2012). One notable response is de Beauvoir's (1949) famous declaration that “one is not born a women, rather, one becomes one” (p. 208). de Beauvior goes on to consider: What it the value of woman? How is woman defined? What are the effects of this definition? How might she be defined differently? How might she be defined in less exclusive ways, in more inclusive ways, in less oppressive ways? I attempt to apply these questions to the soccer-playing women within a coed sport space. This sporting space is a social and cultural space full of systems of power and manifestations of identity. Power and identity are also layers of this feminist lens; according toFoucault (1980b), to understand identity, politics, and culture, one has to understand power and 80 discourse. Additionally, Foucault contends that gender is germane to powerful cultural forces influencing identity. Foucault’s understanding of gender informed the work of feminist scholar Judith Butler (1988). She poses an argument drawn from ideas surrounding power, gender, and identity. Through her argument, she seeks to radically re-conceptualize how we understand gender, sex, and the subject. Butler puts forth questions such as: How is gender meaningful? How do we recognize people as gendered? How did gender come to define us fundamentally? These questions can be explored in a gendered space such as coed soccer. Often, social norms define gender. A feminist approach challenges gender norms, it questions a social sporting space established by a patriarchal system of power. To “do” FPCS, I contend that such a project must include three central tenets. First, it would begin with a feminist standpoint epistemology. Second, it would use the theory and method of articulation as defined by British Cultural Studies. And third, it would apply Physical Cultural Studies and its focus on the body of the researcher and participant alike. These three tenets, central to FPCS, are discussed in this section. Through this discussion, I aim to not only outline what a FPCS looks like but also set the stage for my own project that employs FPCS. The inclusion and focus on females in this project is just one step toward Feminist Physical Cultural Studies' feminist standpoint epistemology. The feminist in Feminist Physical Cultural Studies (FPCS) is also political in addition to epistemological (Morris, 1988). Politically, its agenda is driven by primary tenets of feminist research: “(a) it focuses on the condition of women in society, and (b) it is grounded in the assumption that women generally experience subordination” (Macionis & Gerber, 2010, p. 35). These are the starting points for FPCS. Epistemologically, FPCS follows PCS in the way it privileges lived experiences – those of the researcher and researched. Because it is in those lived experiences that the multiplicity and complexity of reality can be understood first hand. FPCS turns on a standpoint epistemology that continually asks if and how certain groups (women, racial and ethnic minorities, those in the GLBTQ community, persons with disabilities, etc.) are being subordinated through language, movements, representations, practices and social structures. Its central feminist features are drawn from key theorists (Angela McRobbie, Judith Williamson, Meaghan Morris – discussed above) and works in the tradition of Feminist Cultural Studies. First, it is aligned with the essays in Women Take Issue and the way in which they gave voice to a historically and presently marginalized group, a minority surrounded by members of a 81 dominant group (women playing coed soccer). It’s important to remember that this can occur among different marginalized groups – the poor, immigrants, the elderly; women are a focus in my project. And each group of women and each woman's experience of marginalization are on account of different circumstances and conditions; the multiplicity of these experiences are connected by common threads that collectively help the marginalized group be heard. Next, FPSC utilizes the theory and method of articulation as put forth by British Cultural Studies (see Hall's description in Policing the Crisis: Mugging, the State and Law and Order

(1978) of the political and social production of crime statistics). As discussed above the theory and method of articulation is the way in which meaning is produced; everything has meaning, 22 therefore nothing exists outside of it (Slack, 1999). This concept describes a dialectical relationship among aspects of culture: these elements include signs, symbols, language, movements, and all parts of social structures. In and among these cultural elements are systems of power. Central to FPCS is its ability to dissect, unpack, and deconstruct systems of power related to gender. Be it through bodies, performances, spaces, identities, or practices – the theory and method of articulation applies to discourses surrounding gender and power. The ways in which these sometimes abstract ideas are manifested in and through sites of physicality can lead to a better understanding of marginalization, subordination, domination, and hegemonic relations. These are often subtle, yet far reaching, historically embedded systems of power reproducing inequalities among gendered bodies. Therefore, the bodily articulations of gender, power, and culture, as put forth by Giardina and Newman's (2011b) definition of Physical Cultural Studies inform the third central tenet for FPCS. The express of culture on bodies is inescapable in many spaces but even more so in spaces of physicality such as sport. The ways in which gender and power are embodied through active moving, living, and breathing vessels of culture emphasizes the theory and method of articulation's corporeality. This is presented through a concentration on the body; participant bodies and researching bodies alike are the focus of Physical Cultural Studies. FPCS is concerned with female bodies.

22 In a similar vein to my use of Kristeva and Butler, including the Theory and Method of Articulation alongside Kristeva’s notion of pre-meaning may seem contradictory. It is my intention to use my familiarity with each of these theories to better understand the complex and constantly changing social space that is coed soccer. 82

Observing and interacting with female bodies can help us understand these bodies as physical, social, and cultural entities. Embodying feminist sensibilities both physically and intellectually cultivates a project that brings forward the experiences of women. These experiences occur on the surface and sometimes more powerfully, they occur within and among the minds of women. Acknowledging these perspectives through collaboration and partnership between researches and participants has the potential to be a powerful movement. These ideas are put into practice in the following project. I play and interact with other adult women soccer players. I witness their struggles, celebrations, and defeats. Along with them, I struggle, I celebrate, I am defeated. In my role as researcher, I talk with them intimately and then share their stories. Together, we attempt to make change in this sport space, which ultimately contributes to a cultural adjustment in the league, thus making room for participants of all genders, races, ethnicities, and abilities.

CHAPTER 3

METHODS

This project is a critical ethnography of South City Soccer Association (SCSA). This ethnography is grounded in a feminist version of Physical Cultural Studies (as previously discussed); it includes participant observation, focus groups, interviews, and review of relevant internet material and league documents including rules of play. Intertwined throughout the collection of empirical evidence is the documentation of my own personal thoughts, reflections, 23 interpretations, and subjectivities. This methodological and theoretical bricolage (Denzin & Lincoln, 1994, 2000; Kincheloe, 2001) is employed in an effort to bring forward new ontological insights. By utilizing multiple methods of inquiry along with diverse theoretical notions, socially and culturally constructed meanings from different perspectives can be revealed. These multiple perspectives are not intended to triangulate empirical material or establish credibility but instead provide a multi-vocal, multidimensional account. This strategy has been referred to as crystallization (Richardson, 2000b). Laurel Richardson likens this form of inquiry to a crystal which, combines symmetry and substance with an infinite variety of shapes, substances, transmutations, multidimensionalities, and angles of approach. Crystals grow, change, alter, but are not amorphous. Crystals are prisms that reflect externalities and refract within themselves, creating different colors, patterns, and arrays, casting off in different directions. What we see depends upon our angle of repose (p. 934, emphasis in original). Influenced by discussions surrounding concepts such as bricolage and crystallization, I developed my qualitative strategy. In this chapter, I present the concrete details of my research methods; this includes the who, what, when, where, why, and how of gathering empirical material. Additionally, I explain how I understand each form of inquiry. These understandings are based on and supported by scholarly reiterations of each of the qualitative concepts. For organizational purposes, I will begin broadly and then focus on specific elements.

23 Denzin and Lincoln (1994) describe the multiple methodologies used in qualitative inquiry as bricolage. This involves “performing a large number of diverse tasks ranging from interviewing to observing, to interpreting personal and historical documents, to intensive self-reflection and introspections” (p. 2).

Epistemological, Ontological, and Axiological Foundations

First, I will present the epistemological, ontological, and axiological foundations on which this project is built. These philosophical tenets are important to discuss when outlining a project and specifically a methodology because I contend the way a researcher chooses to go about a study is influenced by his/her epistemology, ontology, and axiology. The influence may be direct or indirect, conscious or unconscious. In this project, I intentionally acknowledge these influences and discuss how exactly they have shaped my theoretical understanding, agenda, and methodology. For the purpose of discussion, I will define each term – epistemology, ontology, and axiology—then explain how it applies to my project. Various paradigms – positivism, post-positivism, critical theory, and constructivism – are grounded in different epistemologies. For positivists and even post-positivists, they come to know things through reason, and through reasoning can obtain knowledge that is taken to be certain. This may take the form of quantitative research in which surveys and statistical methods are used. These tools aim to produce valid and reliable findings. Post-positivist qualitative research may use interview scripts and long block quotes in an effort to produce valid or trustworthy results. Epistemologically, these types of research suggest that they come to know things objectively and that their findings are valid (Lincoln, Lynham, & Guba, 2011). A critical theory paradigm contends that, by definition, knowledge is uncertain and through one's own experiences knowledge is constructed (Schwandt, 2001). Critical theorists' epistemology is subjectivist as opposed to objectivist and sees findings as value-mediated (Lincoln et al., 2011) as opposed to value-neutral. That is, one knows what he/she knows on account of life experiences. In addition, backgrounds impact the lens through which one views the world. Informed by life experiences and theory, their interpretations of the social world are often driven by their personal values while grounded in theoretical concepts; utilizing theory they take sides in their argument, and announce their biases. Like epistemological paradigms, ontological perspectives shape one’s view of the world and research approach. Plato put forth a dualistic nature of reality: This theory sees two versions of the reality – the world of matter (concrete things) and the world of the mind (objects of the intellect). Rene Descartes suggested that nothing exists but the content of the mind; this is referred to as idealism. Martin Heidegger sought to understand the existential identity of humans as it relate to the material world. He saw existential expressions of human beings as one with 85 being in the world. Ontological positions differ across paradigms. Positivism sees one version of reality that everyone apprehends similarly. While contemporary post-positivists within social science are concerned with understanding human beings, as social beings, and the various ways in which human beings construct knowledge, post-positivists and even critical theorists may suggest that reality is uncertain and there are not one but many realities (Blackburn, 1996). Still, a post-positivist may seek to comprehend and even generalize the different realities, attempting to capture/approximate as much truth as possible. A critical theorist privileges interpretation, and socially constructed truths that are influenced over time by political, economic, ethnic, and gender values (Lincoln, et al., 2011). Critical theorists are often advocates while post-positivists and positivists often present their findings as “informers.” Acknowledging and respecting these many realities can lead to an axiological understanding of the world that values different perspectives and different realities. Conversely, one's axiological views can also predicate and/or influence his/her epistemology or ontology. Axiology involves both ethics and values; it is referred to as the study of the philosophies concerned with values (Rescher, 2005). The extent to which research is value-laden or value free is a key axiological debate. Positivists and post-positivists contend that research should be value free; that is, one's one attitudes and beliefs should not and do not influence their research. According to Lincoln, et al. (2001) some critical theorists contend that inquiry is conducted by humans who naturally apply their own set of values and ethics to the projects they undertake. Some critical theorists would directly acknowledge those values and ethics and even use them to drive his/her inquiry. The latter is the way in which I have chosen to frame my study. The following explains how my own values, ethics (axiologies), and views on the nature of knowledge (epistemology) and reality (ontology) inform my project. To explore this coed soccer culture, I physically immerse myself as a player in the league. This is because my epistemology (how I come to know things) is one that follows Giardina and Newman's (2011b) articulation of Physical Cultural Studies (PCS), which privileges the lived experience and interaction among bodies – both of the researcher and 'researched.' Drawing from their work, I contend that as researchers we can better understand the social world by observing and interacting with these cultural beings – on a physical, embodied co-present level. Therefore, I explore the social world alongside my participants—learning with and from them.

In addition to a PCS perspective, I follow Sandra Harding's (1986) call for more projects grounded in standpoint epistemologies of women and minorities. As discussed previously, early cultural studies work were often written by (and therefore from the standpoint of) men (often middle class and white). Eventually women pointed out that how they see the world is different. Women often come from a different place on the social hierarchy than men and this view of the world needs to be shared in order to better understand culture (Aden, 1999). This ethnography acknowledges my epistemological understanding of coed soccer as an adult female soccer player, myself. It is informed by my own values, beliefs, interpretations, and subjectivities. That is, how I was raised, where I am from, to what I was/am exposed all inform how I see the world. These interpretations are not right or wrong but a product of my lived experience prior to and through the research process. My first-hand experience as a woman and with women contributes to my epistemological foundation. Prior to entering the coed soccer space for this project, I reflected on my own location to the object of study, and how such a positioning may shape my research. Ontologically, I follow Denzin's (2001) argument that there is no truth, only interpretation. That is, there is not a single truth that exists 'out there' waiting to be discovered. Instead, reality is socially constructed; individual interpretations constitute multiple realities. Different perspectives view the world differently: One's reality of a situation or thing is different from another person's reality because they are each unique beings with unique perspectives. This ethnography is presented using my experiences—read through theory—of the social space of coed soccer as well as those that I interview. This multi-vocal project recognizes that there are multiple realities and telling the same story through different voices enhances a project. This can take the form of crystallization. For Laura Ellingson, “crystallization depends upon including, interweaving, blending, or otherwise drawing upon more than one genre of expressing data” (p. 11). This comes about in the way in which I incorporate interviews from both past and present female members of SCSA of different ages, race, and class as well as my own participant observations and reflexive notes. I include all of this because axiologically, I value equity among people. I believe in creating spaces that allow men, women, immigrants, and poverty-stricken individuals to play, compete, and express themselves in empowering ways; sport is one such vehicle for expression. As a part of this project, I work with my participants in an effort to present SCSA decision makers with recommendations to create a more inclusive sporting space. 87

These cultural and social spaces have the capacity to demonstrate equality; collaborating with participants within these spaces can further an agenda that values people of different social classes, races, ages, ability levels, and genders.

Critical Ethnography, Self-Reflexivity, and Ethics

Critical Ethnography

Ethnographic accounts typically fall into one of three categories: realist, autoethnography, or critical. Each can be characterized by a combination of different epistemologies, ontologies, and axiologies. In the following section, I focus my attention on critical ethnography because that is the version I employ in my project. After an in depth discussion critical ethnography, I will describe autoethnography which is an element of my project and a more experimental and 24 interpretive use of ethnography. Each category of ethnography – realist , auto, and critical – have informed this project about sport. Sporting critical ethnographies. Critical ethnography is a form of inquiry that questions and challenges the taken-for-granted and normalized nature of the social world; in this way it uses critical theory to gain insight. That is, it does not accept “the way things are;” instead, it challenges the way things are by trying to understand why things are the way they are. “The way things are” may include systems of power and social issues within communities and populations. Delving below these surface-level understandings can ultimately translate and contribute to an agenda for the researcher, one that typically involves an element of social action or advocacy for the community or population. A critical ethnographer may attempt to redefine a problem (Denzin, 2010). For example, a neighborhood experiencing a high rate of mugging may conclude that there is need for more streetlights so that criminals stay away from their neighborhood. A critical approach to this same problem may seek to understand the motives of the 'muggers.' A researcher may come to realize that current economic conditions have created large unemployment figures, therefore more people have less, become desperate and turn to stealing in order to feed their children or pay their rent. Considering the context of these issues is a key component of critical ethnography.

24 I mention the existence of realist ethnography here because it is from realist ethnography through which both critical and autoethnography developed. Unlike my use of critical and autoethnography, realist ethnography takes a third person, objective approach to a population/setting. The researcher is not 'in' the project but instead takes a 'God's eye view approach' (Denzin & Lincoln, 2011). 88

An example of a critical approach to sport is presented in Newman and Giardina's (2011) critical ethnography of NASCAR. The researchers immerse themselves in “NASCAR Nation” by not only attending and tailgating at events, but by joining fantasy leagues, participating in message boards, reading blogs, and consuming mainstream media associated with NASCAR. Additionally, they consider the political climate of the times and how that influences the sporting spaces. They witness Bush-era politics in action, complete with visits from the president himself, celebrations of the war on terror, and emphasis on militarization, and neoconservative/neoliberal ideas. Their observations and interactions suggest that NASCAR's 'diversity problem' is clearly the result of the cultivation of a racist environment (i.e. sales of t-shirts containing racial slurs and prominent display of the confederate flag) born of long-held regional class and racial politics (as opposed to NASCAR’s view, which is that through targeted marketing efforts it will be able to increase minority attendance). A critical female perspective on sport is presented through ethnographies in Athletic Intruders: Ethnographic Research on Women, Culture, and Exercise (Bolin & Granskog, 2003). For example, “A Woman's Place is in the Cardiovascular Room? Gender Relations, the Body, and the Gym” (Dworkin, 2003) and “Postmodern Aerobics: Contradiction and Resistance” (Markula, 2003) depict the authors’ observations in a fitness center. They question this space and its role in the social construction of femininity and specifically the female body. The authors point to this 'healthy space' as one that may actually be sending messages reinforcing gender binaries and fostering unhealthy ideas about thinness and the body. These ethnographies ignite conversations that question widely accepted social norms. Denzin and Lincoln (2011) suggest that qualitative inquiry is in a moment that calls for critical conversations and moral dialogues. These discourses should include questions about democracy, nationalization, gender, race, class, and globalization. These subjects are easy to ignore because they are complex and at times not obvious. Solutions to problems surrounding these issues are not simple. A Drive for Diversity program will not automatically ameliorate NASCAR's racial problematic. It is built on centuries of racial oppression. But a greater awareness of the problem through a critical ethnography such as Newman and Giardina (2011) will likely assist some in thinking deeply about the sport and then further analyze other spaces where such exclusion is reproduced (Cannella & Lincoln, 2011).

Why critical ethnography? I chose critical ethnography because I aim to redefine SCSA's “problem.” There has been a recent decline in the number of women playing in the SCSA coed league. A critical ethnography investigates this issue by questioning current social systems in place resulting in this 'unintentional' form of exclusion (Denzin & Lincoln, 2011). It also attempts to redefine the problem. For example, an initial statement of the problem may be that the league needs to direct more advertising toward active females. Board members may see it as a marketing problem. But, redefining the problem may lead to a realization that the current culture of the league is one that is intimidating to women. In the following section, I discuss the key elements of critical ethnography employed in my project. Key tenets of critical ethnography. Ethnography is both a process and a product (Tedlock, 2000). An ethnographic approach relies on “firsthand observations . . . which allow the researcher to see how people diverge from the culturally defined, idealized model of behavior” (Peoples & Bailey, 1994, p. 89). Ethnography is a dynamic process, it is not rigid or constraining, instead it enables a researcher to gain “knowledge of the social world through a fluid and flexible design that often emerges as the project unfolds” (Hammersley & Atkinson, 1995, p. 11). Ethnographies involve the immersion of the researcher into a culture; observations and interviews aid in the description and exploration of a culture. Critical ethnography is more than just description; it delves below the surface, questioning and critiquing received knowledge as well as advocating for a certain group or agenda. The critical aspect of “critical ethnography” is displayed by the extent to which an ethnographer embodies critical theory. A critical approach to the research act is grounded in critiques of society, organization, relationships, interactions, and individuals. Ultimately, it questions systems and productions of power in conjunction with an emancipatory agenda. It challenges ideologies, brings awareness to forms of oppression, and seeks change (Thomas, 1993). Paul Atkinson, Sara Delamont, and William Housley (2008) point to the way it brings attention to social action through fieldwork. Ethnographic work is founded on a commitment to understand everyday life in a given social world through a sustained engagement with that world. It is predicated on the recognition that local social organization and the conduct of everyday life are complex, in that they are enacted through multiple modes of social action and representation (p. 31- 32). 90

Through its attention to multiple modes social life (sensory, discursive, spatial, temporal, and material) rich detailed research is created. At the heart of these research processes is action and organization (Atkinson, et al., 2008). According to D. Soyini Madison (2005) critical ethnographers produce powerful “knowledge which guides and equips us to identify, name, question, and act against the unjust; consequently we unsettle another layer of complicity” (p. 6). Further, “critical ethnography becomes the 'doing' or the 'performance' of critical theory. It is critical theory in action” (p. 15). A critical mind is central to this form of ethnography; germane to the process is the researcher as a living, breathing human. Subjective human beings are biased, they make mistakes, wrestle with theory, and second-guess research decisions (Shaffir, Puddephatt, & Kleinknecht, 2009). Ethnography provides a space for a discussion about the human elements of research. Shaffir, et al. (2009) relay accounts of the “not so perfect world of practice.” They refer to the ideal way research takes place as described in textbooks and then the real, complicated, human way it actually goes. This discussion is important to me, as I research, interact, and analyze. People, organizations, and ideas do not always fit neatly inside 'boxes' (theories, concepts, definitions, guidelines). Wrestling with these ideas and revealing my struggles is an important element of my project. According to Atkinson et al. (2008), What makes ethnographic work special is that its authors are able to generate new theoretical concepts, identify the steps in a particular social process, reveal the organizational principles of social groupings, identify explanatory mechanisms in social dynamics, and link these issues to broader theoretical frames of understanding (p. 2). Along with acknowledging the researcher's ideals, values, and beliefs, his/her physical existence is also important. As Amanda Coffey (1999) describes, within ethnography there exists an element of co-presence, the researcher is present in the research. Further, the researcher's body and mind are interacting with participants, physically and emotionally. Following Coffey (1999) I recognize my social self in the field. I am aware of the project's continuum between being professional and personal. Like other aspects of life, situations are rarely purely professional or purely personal. Coffey (1999) refers to another continuum in ethnography, one between familiar and strange. She warns researchers not to make the field too familiar and to always view people, relationships, organizations, and situations, from different perspectives. This notion is especially pertinent to my project because, my field, the coed soccer league, is a space with which I am 91 very familiar. I have played soccer for over 25 years and have participated in this league for the past three years. Therefore, I attempt to make the familiar strange by playing different positions during games, watching different matches, interacting with different people, and observing different groups (referees, captains, older women, younger women, couples, moms, and dads). With each group, person, or situation I engage personally with the process of fieldwork. Critical ethnography allows me to take this approach. Autoethnography. Autoethnography has been described as 'my story' (Ulmer, 1989). It tells the story of an individual, from a first person perspective. This is in contrast to research that seems “as if (it) was written from nowhere by nobody” (Ellis & Bochner, 2000, p.734). Instead, through an autobiographical account of the researcher's experience, autoethnography “displays multiple layers of consciousness, connecting the personal to the cultural” (p. 739). Autoethnography is rooted in personal epiphanies within the author’s life. The opening vignettes of this project are written from an autoethnographic perspective. I share my story; it is revealing and at times difficult to write about/expose some thoughts and experiences that I had never said aloud let alone written down for authors to read. Within autoethnographic writing such as the opening vignettes, a researcher “asks (his/her) readers to feel the truth of (his/her) stories and to become co-participants, engaging the storyline morally, emotionally, aesthetically, and intellectually” (p. 754). According to Bud Goodall (1996), autoethnography explores the self as “Other.” It is a sort of “out of body” experience in that the writer reflects back on his/her actions, reactions, motives, thoughts, and feelings. It contemplates the underlying issues of a personal experience. It is honest, sincere, and genuine (Tracy, 2010). In their book Moving Writing, Pirkko Markula and Jim Denison (2003) encourage new ways of writing about sport, pointing to personal narratives and autoethnography as one way to advance the field of sport studies. The insertion of personal stories into the research text can more deeply connect the researcher to his/her audience. Markula and Denison point to the work of Andrew Sparkes (1999; 2002) as an example of a multilayered exploration of the body in sport. He shares his own experiences with back pain as an athlete, including not only medical reports, newspapers cuttings, and theory on back pain, but conversations, and diary extracts. In Talking Bodies: Men's Narratives of the Body and Sport (Sparkes & Silvennoinen, 1999), several ethnographies relay personal stories from male athletes about the relationships, negotiations, and emotions interwoven in their career in sport. Similarly, in “The Way We Ran: Reimagining 92

Research and the Self” Denison (2007) shares his experiences on a collegiate track team. Denison follows Norman Denzin's (2003) work on performance ethnography. As a student of Denzin's, Denison (2007) recalls that, “Norman encouraged us to experiment with ways to write the world. 'Shatter conventions,' he repeated often and loud. 'Study what’s close to you. . . . Produce understanding not knowledge” (p. 335). In Chapter 6, (My) Gender, Power, and Participation, I employ an autoethnographic strategy to present my personal and self-reflexive experience playing in SCSA’s coed league. This technique allowed me to display the emotions, struggles, and questions I wrestled with in my field notes in a provocative and creative way. On one level it was therapeutic for me and I my aim was for it to vividly illustrate the intricacies of one women’s experience playing in a coed soccer league so that my audience can better understand the complexity of the physical and social setting. Through pieces like this, autoethnographers have the ability to produce understanding. Though, its place in “academia” comes with questions, specifically about evaluation. According to Bryant Alexander (2011) autoethnographies are uncritique-able. This is because of the personal reflections involved; it would be like critiquing someone's diary. Others contend that while personal, autoethnographies should express a reality and be believable (Richardson, 2000a). For example, when writing dialogue within an autoethnography – creating believable and comprehensible conversations can be difficult. The conversation being re-created was likely not recorded. Therefore it can be difficult to re-create in a natural way and if appropriate should be critiqued despite its autoethnographic nature. While it is not necessary to insert exact quotations, it is important to meet literary standards in cases that attempt to achieve aesthetic quality (Richardson, 2000a). Autoethnographies are a part of the contested methodologies that Denzin and Lincoln (2011) delineate in their moments of qualitative inquiry. During a time when scientism is privileged and objective accounts are considered good science – autoethnographies are placed in opposition on account of their subjective and personal attributes. Their contrasting position presents a stage for debate about the definitions of knowledge, the politics of evidence, and what it means to gain new understanding about the social world.

Self-reflexivity

Intentionally acknowledging the relationship between being a researcher and being an actor in the world characterizes reflexive research (Simmonds, 1997). This acknowledgment, in essence, threatens traditional, impersonal, unbiased research (Pels, 2000). Self-reflexivity has been defined as the process of “personally and academically reflecting on lived experiences in ways that reveal the deep connections between the writer and her or his subject” (Goodall, 2000, p. 137). Goodall suggests, “to be reflexive means to turn back on yourself the lens through which we are interpreting the world” (p. 137, emphasis in original). This occurs when the author is saying something about the real world, while simultaneously disclosing something about oneself (Pels, 2000). Throughout this project, as an adult female soccer player-researcher I not only observe and interact, but equally as important, I reflexively observe my experience in the league. Alongside descriptive field notes, I record reflexive notes. This technique is in contrast to ethnographers such as Loic Wacquant (2004), who filed thousands of pages of pure description during his project on the boxing community of Chicago's South Side. Wacquant did not insert his own thoughts, ideas, or opinions. My strategy aligns with Carrington (2008) who kept two journals during his project on race and British football. He followed the advice of a mentor and kept one journal of pure observations and one self-reflexive journal. Carrington found it difficult to keep these journals separate – that is, his personal thoughts eventually intertwined with his descriptive notes, creating one journal. Similarly, I find it most effective to keep one journal. As I record my descriptive notes, I insert elements of self-reflexivity marking these insertions in all capital letters. This keeps my thoughts and mental images flowing naturally. The self-reflexive portions include my reactions, bias, assumptions, and judgments; each are recognized and processed as a part of the analysis. This reflexive strategy contributes to the immersive nature of Physical Cultural Studies. Incorporating self-reflexivity (Carrington, 2009; Denzin, 1997) enhances critical ethnography by the way in which it has the ability to unearth silent but powerful systems at work in a space such as coed soccer. Following Carrington's use of self-reflexivity (as discussed in the previous chapter), I explore my own body as a social construct and my experience of it. This involves how I negotiate my surroundings (a coed soccer league) and embody social situations (Simmonds, 1997). As Simmonds writes, “it is impossible to escape the body and its constructions. Therefore, 94 being conscious of myself as a person, an embodied self, is what helps me perceive things that 'others cannot see or feel'” (p. 60). This process is not clearly defined but messy and at times even difficult to put onto paper. Through my self-revelations, I hope others may recognize parts of themselves in my writing, shedding new light on the familiar, with the ultimate intention of bringing material freedom to others (Madison, 2011). That is, I hope others will gain insight on their own physical and social situations, through exposure to the experiences shared in my project.

Ethical Considerations

My consideration of ethical issues related to this project began months before and continued for months after the formal requirements as set forth by the academy. Following University research protocol, I submitted a Human Subjects Application for Full Internal Review Board and Expedited Exempt Review. The application included a letter of approval to conduct research from the South City Soccer Association Board (SCSA), explanation of the project (including procedures for gathering and storing empirical evidence), and an informed consent form to be presented to all participants (See Appendix A). The application was approved by the University Board under Expedited Exempt Review (See Appendix B). The information provided within this application did not represent the first or last time I contemplated ethical issues in regards to the project. In the initial stages of this project proposal, I reflected on my own motives for this project. I pondered questions such as: Why do I want to embark on this project? Do I have self- serving motives? If I do, is that wrong? Do I already have an opinion on female participation in SCSA? What has influenced that opinion? How will I negotiate that opinion as a researcher in this space? Following Denzin (1989), "interpretive research begins and ends with the biography and self of the researcher" (p. 12). Therefore, questions such as these were not only asked prior to entering the field but were also asked while conducting observations, interacting with participants, analyzing my field notes and interview transcripts, and drawing conclusions. These questions are a part of an ethics of care (Gilligan, 1982). This is a level of ethics that does not 'stop' at avoiding harm toward 'subject' but instead it is grounded in nurturance and compassion. It is constantly concerned with what is driving a project. Referred to as reflexive or critical or radical ethics (Cannella & Lincoln, 2011), it infuses a moral dialogue throughout inquiry. This is

95 an ethics that is always/already concerned with power and oppression even as it avoids constructing 'power' as a new truth. Researchers “accompany” communities, rather than test/know/judge them (Canella & Lincoln, 2011). Critical ethnography as pedagogy. My project follows a Freirean pedagogy that works with people and not on them. Also referred to as a pedagogy of the oppressed, it sees students and teachers (or in research, participants and researchers) as collaborators, co-constructing knowledge (Freire, 2006). This applies to my project regarding women who have historically experienced subordination and in some cases oppression most especially in the field of sport. Therefore, I accompany this “oppressed” group with the intention of giving them hope to achieve a more equal status on the coed soccer field. Together we aim to make SCSA a more inclusive space, by talking about power systems at work and taking action to improve the condition for women. For Paulo Freire, the goal of education/research is not to gain information but is to aid one another in recognizing that we are all subjects of our own lives, not “objects” of others stories. He called for collective engagement, dialogue, transformations and existence this is not about gaining information. My ethnography is guided by these ethical imperatives. Critical ethnography as advocacy. I follow a feminist communitarian model; that is, I intentionally seek to uncover practices, attitudes, and beliefs that contribute to the subordination of marginalized groups. Feminist communitarians aim to identify subtle forms of oppression and imbalance and teach their audiences to “address questions about whose interests are regarded as worthy of debate” (Steiner, 1989, p. 158). It “presumes that the community is ontologically and axiologically prior to people” (Denzin, 2009, p. 70). That is, it begins by gaining a contextual understanding of a situation and population – this foundation is one that is simultaneously historical and political. Feminist communitarians hold a perspective that sees individuals as members of a group that presently exist, but also acknowledges that the group's current state is a result of historical conditions. Recognizing the group's history, feminist communitarians work with individuals and give voice to those oppressed historically and currently. For example, the women soccer players that I interview are a part of a larger community that has existed for decades prior to their involvement. I recognize the past and present female members of the coed soccer community through interviews with multiple generations of female soccer players in South City. This recognizes that this marginalized group is not comprised of specific women at one point in time, but a product of a history of inequality and subordination. Within a feminist 96 communitarian model, I am cognizant of relations of power that exist and ones that I may be reproducing as a researcher when interviewing participants or analyzing observations. In my attempt to avoid a hierarchical relationship with my participants, I often look/act more like a friend than a researcher. That is, my communication with them extends beyond our one-hour semi-structured interview bother physically and virtually. I exchange texts, emails, and Facebook messages with my participants which results in the deepening our relationship. In one instance, a participant expresses interest in running for the SCSA board, I encourage her to do that and lend my support by suggesting others vote for her. In another instance, I participate in an adventure race with one of my participants; we each registered for the event unaware of the other’s interest but when we became aware, made plans to complete the race together. I periodically checked in with my participants regarding job searches, semester exams, and healing injuries. I did not do these things to in order to gather more empirical evidence, but because I cared about each of my participants individually and because that is what caring people/friends do. My positioning lead to ethical musings before, during, and after interactions with my participants. This can occur when ethnographers fully immerse themselves in and among the bodies they study with the intention of creating a shared world (Joseph & Donnelly, 2012). This produces gray areas around which solid ethical boundaries are not set. Therefore, I wrestle with some scenarios as a researcher/co-participant/friend. I include my ethical and self-reflexive ponderings in this project. Following Giardina and Newman (2011) and Janelle Joseph and Michelle Donnelly (2012) I contend that such contemplation is a source of knowledge. The revelation of these emotions helps to further the ethnographic field and demonstrate the “aesthetic, embodied, performative, (auto)biographical discourses that have come to be intertwined with the research act” (Giardina & Newman, p. 189). While Joseph and Donnelly (2012) hone in on the act of researching and alcohol consumption, they raise and wrestle with similar sets of ethical boundaries of physical cultural studies. That is, to create a shared social world with your participants means to intentionally blur the researcher/friend line while maintaining respect, emotional safety, and common sense. This is what I aim to do in my interactions and bring to the research surface within autoethnographic sections of my project. You see, the negotiation and display of researcher/participant relationships/friendships can bring about “risk, discomfort, uncertainty, vulnerability, and doubt” that which when shared and 97 overcome can be empowering (Giardina & Newman, p. 189) and further reinforce the dissolution of power dynamics that can so easily creep into research/participant interactions. Collectively, the enactment and presentation of gray areas, blurred boundaries, and ethical musings create a rich complex depiction of the social world. Finally, an ethical representation of my participants is important (Bochner, 2002). My ethnography includes competitive spaces full of strong emotion as well as social spaces involving consumption of alcohol. In both such instances, individuals may depict extreme behaviors, which I intend to subjectively portray appropriately and with dignity. Many of my teammates and other members of the league are aware of my project, though I do not believe it is something that they actively consider. I openly discuss my project when questioned and hope that more awareness of my agenda will help further my cause. My ethical imperatives extend beyond the conclusion of this project. Within my interviews, I talk with women in the league about ways to improve conditions for females. It is my intention to collaborate with these women and form mutually held conclusions (Christians, 2011). Then together, approach the SCSA board with recommendations to improve the league and ultimately the lives of women.

Gathering Empirical Material

Entering the Field

For the past three years, I have played on an adult coed recreational soccer team within South City Soccer Association (SCSA). SCSA is comprised of both coed and all-male leagues; it is run by a seven-member board. I approached the president of the board for permission to do this project. I was spurred by my own informal conversations with members of the board about the low number of women playing in the coed league. The board approved my research proposal and after three years of recreational play, I entered the space intentionally observing through a Feminist Physical Cultural Studies lens.

Participant Observation

My participant observations for this project spanned over 10 months (February- November); the period included two coed seasons consisting of 10 games each. I am one of four women on a 16-person roster. Games are held on Sunday evenings; following the games,

98 members of the league often socialize over beers in the parking lot or meet at a near-by restaurant. My participant observations include both game-time and social situations with SCSA members outside of weekly matches but still created via a connection to soccer and/or SCSA. Some ‘events’ include more social atmospheres – end of the season parties, weekly post-game tailgates, viewing of soccer matches – but SCSA remains the common connecting theme that spur the social settings and do not include physically playing soccer. I do not include social situations that take place outside soccer: These include a community event where SCSA members are present though not intentionally attending on account of their association with SCSA such as a 5K run, yoga class, festival, or church function. The largest portion of my observations surrounds our weekly matches. I chose to exclude these interactions in order to respect the nature of these social occasions both for me personally and for my participants. Comments made or actions taken outside of the soccer arena would extend my project outside the scope I have selected. For this phase of the project I chose to focus my observations around soccer-related events, such as games, scrimmages, as well as pre- and post-games interactions. Following the matches, I recorded field notes at home on a personal laptop computer. The field notes were recorded within a 24-hour window following the game. If I was not able to thoroughly record my observations immediately following the game, I listed key words and phrases to remind myself of specific interactions or observations. I did not record field notes during the game. While the time lag is not very long, I recognize that my observations are not recorded in real-time. I address time lag through the duration of my observations and use of crystallization. That is, I observe a total of 20 matches over two seasons. Therefore, I draw from these multiple experiences to gain insights. In addition, I do not limit my collection of evidence to only observations. I include interviews and focus groups in an effort to gain multiple perspectives and not only my observations. Further, if my observations occurred during a time when alcohol was consumed (post-game tailgates or end of the season banquet) or if an interviewee shared something in a ‘private’ space such as a bible study, that was pertinent to my project, I requested permission from that individual in person or via email, before including those 25 observations in my field notes.

25 This is in line with the ethical imperatives put forth by Joseph and Donnelly (2012) as it pertains to conducting research on/with individuals who are consuming alcohol. 99

My recorded field notes are descriptive of the sport space. By this I mean I recorded concrete details about what people wear, the cars they drive, the equipment they use, their emotions and their reactions. Through a thick description of my experience, I aim to express the lived experiences of league participants, experiences that are always already performative (Butler, 1990). It is my intention for this project to illustrate the inter-workings of adult coed soccer but in a way that even someone most familiar with the space sees it with a new twist. Further, I aim for my description to “show” and not tell (Tracy, 2010). According to Tracy, To illustrate data’s complexity, researchers are advised to show, meaning that they provide enough detail that readers may come to their own conclusion about the scene. This is contrasted from the author telling the reader what to think. Showing is rhetorically more difficult and usually requires more words than telling. As such, researchers are often called on to make tough decisions about which parts of their research reports to show rather than tell (p. 844). To accomplish this, I draw on my descriptive field notes regarding what people say and do, how they play and how they interact with teammates, opponents, and referees. I focus on the women in the league—where they play, how they play, what they say, how they act and react. My observations include how both men and women dress, the equipment they use, and the persona they espouse. I note body language, foul language, and foreign language. The league contains a significant amount of international players; many are male and fewer are female but all contribute to the gendered sport space. Additionally, my observations include those within cyberspace. SCSA has a Facebook page where members interact through this medium: pictures are posted, comments are made, and stats are compiled via the site. Posts on Facebook occur approximately three to four times per week. Therefore, I 'check' these sites weekly at the same time I am recording my participant observations. I copy and paste the posts and if appropriate, I will include self-reflexive notes, reacting to and analyzing the message. Online, on the field, and in social settings related to SCSA, I participate and observe. A burgeoning field of “virtual ethnography” and “technography” has been discussed among qualitative scholars such as Gabriella Coleman (2010) and Grant Kein (2009). These strategies conduct entire ethnographies of online communities (see Jarret's [2010] ethnography of YouTube) or focus on the use of technology in the social world (see Kein's discussion on ethnography in the age of mobility). I do not attempt to do either of these entirely; social media “observations” is one 'side' of my 100 crystalline. An additional aspect of the cyberspace that I utilize is the SCSA website and the information posted including, the organization’s mission, history, bylaws, policies and rules. Each of these electronic documents inform my research and serve as representation of SCSA. These observations enhance the first-hand experiences and richer interactions that take place surrounding soccer matches, which are the main focus on my participant observations. Much has been written about what it means to be a participant observer (Adler & Adler, 1994; Gold, 1958; Merriam, 2009; Patton, 2002; Waldford, 2001). Central to participant observation is the balance between being an insider and an outsider. According to Michael Patton (2002), Experiencing the program as an insider accentuates the participant part of participant observation. At the same time, the inquirer remains aware of being an outsider. The challenge is to combine participation and observation so as to become capable of understanding the setting as an insider while describing it to and for outsiders (p. 268). This balance between insider and outsider can also be likened to a continuum of different roles. Raymond Gold (1958) proposes four categories of observational approaches along a sort of continuum. They are complete observer, observer-as-participant, participant-as-observer, and complete participant. Both complete observer and observer-as-participant denote a more peripheral role of the researcher. A complete observer may be sitting behind a one-way mirror or observing in a public setting such as a university student union. The observer-as-participant suggests those being observed are aware of the researcher’s presence. This could occur in a classroom setting. A researcher may sit in the back of a classroom and observe the students and teacher. Of the four typologies, my project is most closely associated with Gold's definitions of participant-as-observer and complete participant. For Gold: A 'participant-as-observer' interacts with those whom he [sic] observes as naturally as possible in whatever areas of their living interest him and are accessible to him as situations in which he can play, or learn to play, requisite day-to-day roles successfully, and whose identity as a researcher is known (p. 218). Acting as complete participant involves much of the same, although as one whose “true identity and purpose…are not known to those whom he observes” (p. 218). A foundational or positivistic perspective would likely suggest that Gold's complete participant role may be unethical, deceptive, and make it impossible to be unbiased and/or not personally invested in a 101 community. Quasi-foundational and anti-foundational perspectives privilege interpretive accounts, and recognize that researchers are human; researchers within these paradigms approach projects with their own subjectivities. This acknowledgment does not make the processes unethical, just natural. It is important to note Gold's typologies were put forth over a half century ago and since then, the field of qualitative inquiry has grown and changed. More recent discussions about participant observation describe the relationship between participant and researcher as a collaborative partnership (Merriam, 2009). “The defining characteristic of this stance is that the investigator and the participants are equal partners in the research process – including defining the problem to be studied, collecting and analyzing data, and writing and disseminating the findings” (Merriam, 2009, p. 125). This version of participant observation is incorporated in my project. Within each version of participant observation, ethical and methodological issues arise. Waldford (2001) suggests observation be a fluid “process of role definition, negotiation and renegotiation” (p. 62). That is, in reality when conducting observations, a researcher may need to reposition himself/herself physically and socially throughout their time in the field. Patricia Adler and Peter Adler (1994) discuss these specifically in their discussion of naturalistic observation. They define observation as “gathering impressions of the surrounding world through all relevant human faculties” (p. 378). Traditionally, naturalistic observation follows a type of non-interventionism, that is, it follows the flow of events. Among hours, days, weeks, and sometimes years of observation, significant findings are identified as major or minor epiphanies that reach an emotional depth or importance of an event. The methodological issues Adler and Adler discuss include balancing involvement/detachment, familiarity/strangeness, and closeness/distance. This balancing act is determined on a case-by-case basis, it is dependent on the situation, the researcher's own subjectivities, and participant relationship. There is no perfect formula – it is a social, fluid, scientific research process.

Talking with People

Another portion of this research project involved formally and intentionally talking with people in a controlled setting: This included two focus groups and twelve one-on-one interviews. The university human subjects committee approval covers both types of interactions. As stated

102 above, prior to conducting the focus groups or interviews, I provided my participants with an explanation of the project's purpose procedures, risks, benefits, and provided them an opportunity to give informed consent to participate in the project. Focus groups. The two focus groups were comprised of three women each, the majority ranging in age from 55 – 65 years old. These women were among the first female members of South City Soccer Association and some can be credited with introducing and expanding soccer for females in South City. I refer to them as South City's female soccer pioneers. I gathered these groups together via snowball sampling (Merriam, 2009). That is, my relationship with one person gave me access to another and so on. I gathered women from two different social circles so that the early days of SCSA are presented from more than one perspective. Through these focus groups, I tell the story of girl's/women's soccer in South City from those that were involved during its foundation. I chose to conduct focus groups not only based on the nature of information I sought to gain, but also as a venue for these women to reminisce and reflect on their impact on their city, their sport. That is, since the information being shared is from memory going back over 30 years, I thought members of the focus group could use one another to help recall certain situations and details related to women’s soccer in South City, which indeed occurred. This qualitative strategy has been referred to as memory-work. According to Jenny Onyx and Jennie Small (2001): Memory-work is a social constructionist and feminist research method that was developed to bridge the gap between theory and experience. It provides a way of exploring the process whereby individual women become part of society, and the ways in which women themselves participate in that process of socialization. (p. 773) Grounded in feminist ideals, memory-work captures an often-untold history of a marginalized group. These are histories not found in textbooks or commonly discussed. Instead, these are versions of the past that interpret the social world through the eyes non-dominate groups. The intention of memory-work is not to detail precise and accurate accounts, but instead to record a subjective and collective history. It is an interpretive history that lends itself to theoretical analysis on account of its social nature. Memory-work is often done in groups in order for members of a certain group to build on and respond to the recollections and emotions of others in the group. 103

Memory-work includes elements of Greg Kamberelis and George Dimitriadis’s (2011) articulation of focus groups that involve the creation of a synergistic atmosphere. That is, an environment in which the participants felt comfortable building upon one another's stories, sharing common insights, and encouraging one another to reveal personal thoughts and reflections. A synergistic atmosphere occurs in an environment where participants feel comfortable and empowered. I held each of the focus groups at a location suggested by my participants: One group selected a local restaurant and the other group selected the home of one participant. Both settings were familiar for my participants. Their selection of these places, made me feel as though I was on their turf, in their 'classroom.' Further I intentionally situated myself 26 like a student of these women, learning from their life experiences on and off the soccer field. The women fed off one another’s stories, remembering and revealing like a type of group therapy session (Kamberelis & Dimitriadis, 2011). The focus groups lasted approximately two hours; I recorded the audio and later transcribed the conversations. I did not take notes during the focus groups (except to jot down follow-up questions) because I felt as though that would take away from my personal interaction 27 with my participants. Throughout the two hours, I posed open-ended prompts such as, “Tell me about your early experiences with soccer;” “How did SCSA come to include women?” “Describe SCSA as a female member during your tenure;” “Why do you think SCSA is struggling to field women currently?” Following the focus groups, I emailed the transcriptions to each of the women in the groups, for their review and approval. Via email I also gave them an opportunity to add any other thoughts or information they think may be pertinent to the project. I too re-read the transcriptions and while doing so made handwritten notes in the margins noting my own reactions to their stories, my emotions, and interpretations. This exercise contributes the reflexive element of my 28 project (as described above). Interviews. Reflexive notes were also interwoven throughout the transcripts of my interviews. The interview portion of the project consisted of semi-structured conversations with

26 My student-like approach was in an effort to break down the power dynamics, recognizing strength in numbers as put forth by Kamberelis and Dimitriadis (2011). 27 I use this same communication style within my interviews. 28 Again, I use this same strategy with my interviews. 104 six women currently playing in the SCSA coed league and six women who previously played in soccer, live in South City, but do not currently play in SCSA’s coed league. The selection of the women currently playing in SCSA was purposive. That is, after approximately four months of participant observation I identified women whose stories would provide various perspectives on the women's coed soccer experience. That is, I attempted to select women that represented a range of ages, life stages, and soccer experiences (which through my observation I had come to know about). The selection of the participants who do not currently play in SCSA was also done via snowball sampling; that is, during each interview with women currently playing, I asked for contacts of women who do not play in SCSA but did play soccer at one point in their lives. Taken together, their accounts create a multi-vocal account contributing to the research crystalline. Each interview lasted approximately one to two hours. They were held at locations convenient and comfortable to my participants, such as their home, a coffee shop, or community center. The open-ended interviews with the women currently playing in SCSA’s coed league included prompts such as: “Tell me about your experience in SCSA;” “How did you get involved in soccer?” “How/why did you get involved in SCSA?” “Tell me about your experience in SCSA as a woman;” “What do you like best about the league?” “What do you like least about the league?” The interviews with women who have previously played soccer but do not play in SCSA included: “How did you get involved in soccer?” “How long and at what level did you play?” “Have you ever played coed soccer?” “Why don’t you play in SCSA’s coed league?” If the participant has previously played in SCSA’s coed league, I included the following questions: “Tell me about your experience in SCSA;” “How/why did you get involved in SCSA?” “Tell me about your experience in SCSA as a woman;” “What did you like best about the league?” “What did you like least about the league?” I utilized these loose scripts in order to keep some continuity among the interviews but also leave space for the participant to relay information and stories that are unique to them. Within their responses topics surrounding age, life stage, sexuality, and ability occasionally arose. If the participant introduced such topics, I used follow-up questions to delve further into those areas. For example, when interviewing a woman with children, if she mentioned her life stage as a factor in her soccer experience, I followed-up with a prompt such as, “Tell me more about how you negotiate the responsibilities that come with your life stage?”

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During the interviews, I made an effort to be aware of the ways in which colonialism/ hierarchical relations between the ‘all-knowing academic’ and subject/interviewee can be easily assumed. I was intentional about building rapport and acknowledging that the interviewee’s story is my interest. Age, ability, class, and gender all interact in during an interview. As the interviewer I did my best to establish a relationship with my participant that attempted to achieve a common ground in an effort to co-construct knowledge. Denzin (2001) explains the interview as way to co-construct knowledge with an interactive process. He describes the reflexive interview as a dialogic conversation and the site and occasion for performance; that is, the interview can be turned into a dramatic, poetic text. Interviews are not merely a means of collecting information but are useful for actively producing texts that reflect the social and political performances of subjects. Further, the reflexive interviewer gives special attention to those performances, spaces and sites where stories crisscross the borders and boundaries of illness, race, class, gender, religion and ethnicity are told. In a similar vein, my interviews follow Elizabeth Hoffman’s (2007) suggestion that interviews be an emotional conversation. I react, agree, and probe. According to Hoffman, researchers’ emotional reactions are as important as other sensory data points, such as visual or auditory reactions. Researchers should not ignore informants’ emotions or expunge them from data records, since important data include understanding “emotional negotiations in fieldwork in a dynamic sense” (p. 342). Drawing from Hoffman (2007) and Denzin (2001) my interviews were a collaborative process between my participants and me.

Combining Theory and Methodology

I just described the ways in which I gathered empirical material for this study. My time 'in the field' included participant observations, interviews, and self-reflexive notes. After I collected all of this evidence, I situated it alongside my theoretical framework. Through a Feminist Physical Cultural Studies lens I attempt to understand the sporting space, sporting femininities, and sporting practices related to South City Soccer Association (SCSA). In the next three chapters, I take a detour through theory in order to 'read,' analyze, and make sense of the words, descriptions, thoughts, bodies, and experiences of both my participants and of myself. In Chapter 4, I share the stories of the female soccer pioneers in South City. These women were among the first adult females to play organized soccer in South City and some were

106 instrumental in the inclusion of women in SCSA. Their stories aid in creating a history of the women of SCSA. I compare and contrast this history with my earlier socio-cultural history of women's soccer in the United States. Both the micro and macro level iterations of the past provide a context for which the present situation can be understood. The focus groups with the female soccer pioneers in South City lay a foundation for the interviews with women currently playing in SCSA's coed league and those who have ceased playing. In Chapter 5, I present the co-constructed knowledge that manifests via my interviews with women currently playing in SCSA. These women help to shed light onto the ways in which they negotiate gender in the sporting space. When I felt led, I incorporated my own self-reflexive notes among these voices; my reactions to their comments and own personal insights add an element of crystallization. Further, I use my previous literature review on socio-cultural aspects of gender and sport. Specifically within those categories, I discuss the social construction of space, identities, and practices. My analysis of the interviews are supported with theoretical frames of previous academic research. I aim to combine these theories in a new way in order to best understand women's experiences in adult recreational coed soccer. In Chapter 6, my own participant observations self-reflexivity complete the critical ethnography. I insert my own theoretically grounded interpretations of the coed league. That is, I go back through my field notes and self-reflexive notes and use past theoretical works to understand the surfaces and identify systems of power at work in the sporting space. This chapter stem from my interpretations, it is value laden, and present a woman's lived experience in the coed league. Finally, in Chapter 7, I conclude with recommendations that I intend to present to the SCSA board. These recommendations are a result of collaboration with my participants. I intend to follow-through with my recommendations, offering to aid in the implementation, if appropriate. Through my interviews, participant observations, and self-reflexive notes I aim to improve the conditions for women in SCSA and all marginalized populations in the league.

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CHAPTER 4

REFLECTING ON WOMEN’S SOCCER PARTICIPATION IN SOUTH CITY

This chapter is drawn from two focus groups comprised of women in their 40s, 50s, and 60s; each of the women was involved in South City Soccer Association (SCSA) as a player for a period of time in their lives. Most of their SCSA experiences took place in the 1980s and 1990s. During each of the focus groups the women used one another’s memories to describe and recall SCSA’s coed league, women’s league, and general female involvement in soccer throughout South City in the 1980s and 1990s. They shared broad descriptions including the events, timelines, and organizational elements of SCSA; throughout the more “factual” depictions, they offered personal and at times emotional accounts of their involvement in SCSA. It is important to note that the 2012 Summer Olympic Games were being held in London, England during the same period I interacted with these women. Specifically, the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team was in the media spotlight as the team competed and ultimately won a Gold Medal. Therefore, soccer- playing females were being broadcasted and watched in many homes, including my participants’. This display of women’s soccer contributed to the stories, memories, and emotional accounts shared within each discussion.

Setting the Soccer (and Scholarly) Scene

Bios and Background

Before I begin with my analysis I think it is important to set the scene. I have included a short bio about each of the women in the focus groups. In addition, I have highlighted a brief chronology of events related to the development of soccer in South City. These events are elaborated upon throughout my analysis; the timeline serves as a reference for the discussion. While some of the dates are compiled from published and verified written accounts, others are estimates, drawn from the recollected oral accounts relayed in my focus groups. Each focus group included three women (ranging in age from 50-60) who had played in SCSA at some point in their lives:

Focus group 1 Yanette: A South City resident for 30 years, Yanette began playing soccer in the western part of 108 the United States before moving to South City and joining SCSA. Yanette played coed and women’s-only soccer for about 25 years of her adult life, and has recently began playing casually again.

Angela: Growing up in France, Angela was familiar with soccer but did not play until adulthood. She does not consider her soccer days ‘over’ but instead states that she is on a soccer hiatus.

Nina: The youngest of all focus groups participants, Nina played coed soccer as a child. She did not pick the sport up again until she was an adult, living and working in South City. Nina’s partner encouraged her join SCSA. She played in SCSA’s all-women’s league.

Focus group 2 Samantha: A South City native, Samantha began playing soccer in her 30s. Samantha’s husband was one of the founding members of SCSA; throughout their lives, as volunteers and sport/ recreation professionals, Samantha and her husband worked to develop adult and youth soccer in South City. Samantha played recreationally and competitively as an adult.

Nadine: Ending her SCSA tenure, about 10 years ago, Nadine was the most recent active member of SCSA among all focus group participants. Nadine (along with Samantha) was one of the first high school girls’ soccer coaches in South City.

Laura: Growing up in Brazil, Laura was surrounded by soccer, but did not play until her mid- 30s while living in South City. She was one of the first female members of the SCSA Board of Directors.

The women recalled the following order of the events and provided me with trophies, plaques, and a written account of SCSA authored by a male founding member. The timeline below is compiled from a combination of those resources (* denotes approximations).

Timeline 1960s: First boys’ varsity soccer team in South City 109

1975: South City College (SCC) forms an unfunded men’s club soccer team 1978:* A competitive city-sponsored adult soccer (including men and women) league existed in South City A youth soccer league (including boys and girls) existed in South City A desire to create an over-30 men’s recreational league is discussed 1979: Wealthy landowner (South City resident) offers his property as a home field for the yet to be established over-30 men’s recreational league Volunteers cleared the wealthy landowner’s property, creating a soccer field and established SCSA as a men’s recreational soccer league SCSA entered 10-year lease with wealthy landowner 1981:* Women petitioned SCSA for inclusion and were welcomed as members 1982:* Coed, all-women, and all-men recreational leagues exist within SCSA Women form one competitive over-30 travel team 1983: Women’s competitive travel team wins regional championship Women’s competitive travel team places eighth in national tournament 1987: Girls’ soccer teams are formed in four South City high schools 1989: Soccer Inc. establishes business in South City 1990-1995: Samantha takes her girls’ travel team to University of North Carolina for summer soccer camps 1990: Wealthy landowner hires Soccer Inc. to manage his property (now a soccer complex) and to further develop soccer in South City 1992: Wealthy landowner sells property to state and local government entities The city of South City (now owner of soccer complex) hires Soccer Inc. to manage property 1992-2012: South City continuously renews Soccer Inc.’s management of all publicly owned soccer field in city limits

A Note about Method

29 Three women comprised each of the focus groups. Focus group 1 was held in Yanette’s

29 Each group was comprised of three participants because that was the number of women I was able reach and who were willing to meet. Establishing communication with each of the women and scheduling a meeting time (finding a time that worked for 110 home on a weekday afternoon. Yanette, Angela, and Nina are all friends. Yanette and Angela are 30 approximately 60 years old and Nina is in her 50s. Focus group 2 took place at a locally-owned restaurant during a weekday lunch hour. The time and place for both groups were coordinated via email. While I did know Yanette (group 1) and Samantha (group 2) as acquaintances prior to this project, I had not met the four other women prior to the focus group meetings. During email exchanges about date, time, and location, I attempted to be as flexible as possible, allowing the participants to pick their preferred day, time, and location. I chose this strategy both out of courtesy – for these women volunteered their time for my project – and in an effort to have my participants in a more comfortable place, a place that which they were familiar, and hopefully a place they felt was safe to share their memories, opinions, and stories. I wanted to be on ‘their’ turf and I wanted them to know that I wanted to learn from them, understand them, not ‘study’ or analyze them. This was in an effort to avoid a researcher-subject relationship and instead build a partnership in exploration of the social world. During each of the 1.5-2 hour focus groups, I explained my project and reasons for talking with them; I explained that I was hoping to gain their perspective of soccer in South City – personally, in SCSA, and generally regarding the sport’s local development. Following this short introduction almost seamlessly the women (sometimes two or three talking over/interrupting one another in a friendly/excited manner) began to share reflections, recall significant dates, and tell stories. During the majority of each focus group, the participants were ‘in control;’ they drew on one another’s memories, laughed, and reminisced. Both groups seemed to communicate a sense of pride regarding their involvement in SCSA. When appropriate, I chimed in with follow-up questions such as “tell me more about that” or re-directed the discussion back to SCSA and 31 soccer in South City. Shortly following each meeting, I transcribed the focus group audio, sent transcriptions to each participant via email for review and as an opportunity to contribute any additional thoughts. My analysis of the focus groups included reading, electronically everyone) was my greatest challenge throughout the entire empirical material collection process. I think this is the nature of convening a group. Additionally, to the majority of the women, I was a complete stranger. Within each group, I knew one women more personally who made an extra effort to help coordinate the meeting (Yanette and Samantha). 30 I did not directly ask any of the participants’ ages because I did not know the women well and thought it had the potential of being offensive and an offensive question would have hindered my efforts to create a safe space and to establish a friendly partnership with the women individually and collectively. Some women did mention their age at some point during the discussion. Other ages are my approximation. 31 As I transcribed, I also recorded my personal reactions to the discussion. This acted as a first stage of analysis; it was also an exercise in researcher reflexivity and an attempt to simultaneously process the material personally and academically. 111 highlighting according to certain themes, and inserting comments in margins. The stories, emotions, and descriptions were an exercise in memory work.

Interpreting South City Soccer History

I have organized this chapter into two main sections that coincide with my three research questions. The first section, Gender, Power, and Participation, addresses my first two research questions from a historical perspective. That is, my participants share their thoughts of past experiences in SCSA.  What social and cultural factors have contributed to the participation and non- participation of adult females in soccer?  How did adult female soccer players negotiate their gender in a coed soccer space?

The second part of this section, Managing Coed Soccer, addresses my third research question. As with the research questions above, my focus group conversations focused on the my participant’s interpretation of their experiences in SCSA 20-30 years ago and the league’s past operations.  In what ways did the operation of the league (governance, by laws, rules, and communication systems) of SCSA enable and contest female participation?

Within each of these sections I weave together my participants’ voices and memories to create a collective and subjective history of SCSA. Throughout, I insert some of the concepts and theories presented in my literature review. Specifically, I use the concepts of space, identities, and practices to make sense of the physical and social scenes relayed. Under each concept, I put forth the main themes that arose across accounts shared among the women in each focus group. While presented under separate headings, I do not contend the themes that surfaced relating to space, identity, and practices are completely distinct. Rather, the concepts overlap in a messy configuration that comprises what I refer to as the social world. Therefore, I recognize an argument can be made to place different themes under alternative categories; I welcome that discussion and point out that spurring such contemplations about the social world is among my intentions.

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Gender, Power, and Participation

I chose to combine my discussion of participation, non-participation, and negotiating gender because I found them to be intertwined in most cases; the conversations about their commencement of participating, their sporting experiences in the league, and decisions to end their soccer career often involved gender negotiation – physically and culturally. This is not to say that gender was the only reason that women chose to play or not; further, it is also not to suggest that gender overshadowed all other vectors of power for every woman. But I do think it is significant and important to unearth, wrestle with, and understand. My participants in the focus groups were able to articulate and connect gender, power, and participation in an insightful and at times beautiful ways. During our conversation, I was able to observe, empathize, and celebrate with them as they shared their emotional reflections on the past relating to soccer, and specifically their experiences on the field and in the social sport space of SCSA.

Space.

Entering a male preserve. Female participation in SCSA was not a part of the organization’s early years; the grassroots effort was spurred by adult male soccer players in 32 South City who wanted an organized outlet and reliable space for soccer. In 1979, SCSA was established as an all-men’s soccer league. After one year, the women (mostly wives of the SCSA members) expressed a desire to join their male counterparts: So we petitioned... we didn’t want to force ourselves on them, so we petitioned them with a letter. We said we prefer that it’s not like a Boy Scout / Girl Scout kind of thing, but we prefer to have coed. But all the women we could muster up signed this petition and presented it to them in a way that said – we really want to participate with y’all at this field and contribute. We feel like women could add a different perspective to this as ladies (Samantha).

32 Detail about the beginning of SCSA can be found in “A History of South City Soccer Association.” In it, founding member, (name withheld), relays a history of SCSA focusing primarily on the men’s competitive team. The establishment of SCSA is recounted, from a male perspective. There is little mention of female involvement and inclusion. Though the book is dedicated “To the wives… they indulged our fantasies, tolerated our excesses, nursed our injuries, and sometimes traveled with us. They were our most loyal supporters and helped us keep a healthy perspective” (name withheld, p. 2). This dedication is an example of Shona Thompson’s (1999) argument in “Mother’s Taxi.” Thompson analyzes women’s role in sport. She presents the accounts of women who continuously place the sporting needs of their children and spouses ahead of their own athletic pursuits, consequently diminishing their participatory involvement in sport and instead reinforcing their ‘support’ role. The dedication in “A History of South City Soccer Association,” celebrates their female support, producing a form of hegemony that does not include sporting females, just supporting females. 113

According to the women, there was no resistance to the petition. “Most of our husbands were playing. So I think that decision wasn’t related to soccer” (Laura). In 1981, the bylaws of SCSA were amended to include female members. A coed league and full-field 11 v 11 women’s league developed. In addition to the league, the women formed a competitive team that trained twice per week and traveled throughout the region to play. In 1983, the team won two different state championships, and they were runners up in the Final 8 in the nation. In the early 1980s the South City women entered the all-male sporting space but also created a space of their own. It just took a long time to develop where they’d trust us. So we were like, we'll show them and that’s why we started traveling. We got better and even better than some of the not serious men players (Samantha). 33 Still, entering a male preserve such as men’s soccer presented challenges; male athletes represented the norm (Dunning, Birrell, & Cole, 1994). Sporting organizations comprised of males embodied aggressive play, physical competition, strength, and speed. A female body attempting to flourish in these sporting ideologies is in contrast with the norm; contesting sporting ideologies with a body marked female can affect a woman’s sport experience. Such challenges are not ‘new,’ but instead a product of a historically produced present that plays out in sport spaces such as soccer. I grew up in France. And in France it was definitely a boys’ game. I had never heard of girls playing futbol – because it was called futbol there. It’s not like basketball – girls were allowed to play basketball. But futbol – people would laugh at you. So when I started playing ... it was odd (Angela).

I was probably eight years old and our rec department got it (a soccer league). I started out in that. You are just out on a team and I was the only girl. I had to put up with the stigma of that, everything that went wrong was my fault. Whether I was part of the play 34 or not (Nina).

33 Scholars have described sport as a masculine domain (Messner & Sabo, 1990) and a male preserve (Dunning, Birrell, & Cole, 1994); this preserve can be observed physically, socially, and culturally. Physically and initially, SCSA was unapologetically a men’s organization. Upon the inclusion of female bodies in the space, the male preserve continued to exist at some level – socially and culturally. The women of SCSA recognized this dynamic and negotiated with patience. 34 These articulations of space represent Lefevbre’s (1991; 2003) notion of the production of social space. That is, these bodies, social beings (and all the meaning they articulate) are the building blocks of space (i.e. a league, a team). In a coed sport space, 114

I grew up in Brazil. Girls never played soccer but I was always around it. And my husband was always an athlete (Laura). Bodies marked as female were perceived to be the “Other” in relation to sport throughout time. These histories of gendered space contributed to the production of SCSA’s coed-league; the norm 35 was to label men as athletes and therefore in a sport space women were the “Other.” The male hegemony did not come from those in charge of the organization nor was it direct, instead it manifested in the sport space through every day practices. “The hard thing about coed was the mentality of some of the players. There were men's players who wouldn't pass you the dag gone ball” (Samantha). Or they would run over you and say – Oh, I'm sorry” (Nadine). Men often physically dominated their female teammates/opponents with their size, skill, and speed. The women acknowledge this difference in ability and biology, but also desired a certain level of respect that comes with a team sport. As Nadine remarked, “They tolerated our presence on the field – some of them. And others were very patient.” Likewise Yanette, who stated: There were some men that I didn’t like and didn’t want to play with them. I didn’t want to play on their team and I didn’t want to play against them. And then there were other men who were just great guys. Because the guys I didn’t want to play with could be selfish pigs. It’s like the men who when women are in the conversation, they don't give damn. They are passing it to each other and you are the token woman. The mix of these masculinities (discussed in more detail later in this chapter) comprised a sport space that could be at times “socially safe” – comfortable and welcoming though often physically unsafe. (Un)Safe space. Negotiating this sport space often meant protecting your body. In a physical, contact sport such as soccer, playing with caution can become an impediment. Yanette, for one, explained that how, “You just have to be careful… but part of soccer is not being careful

Nina was physically included but socially oppressed. The social beings in the space produced a precarious sport space. 35 My participants acknowledged the label of female soccer players as “Other” as a widely accepted norm. This notion has been articulated across sports among females. In “'I Would Just Like to be Known as an Athlete:' Managing Hegemony, Femininity, and Heterosexuality in Female Sport” Lindsey Mean and Jeffrey Kassing (2008) relay interviews with 20 professional female athletes who describe their “Other” label. In one athlete’s words: “They still want it to be normal for men to play and different for women to play. When it stops being different and novel then we will have gotten somewhere” (p. 134).

115 and letting go”. The result is a continuous struggle between the perception of a sporting space (a place to let go) and for some the physical reality of soccer (a place you need to be careful). Physicality is celebrated in sport and a type of equal/fair treatment is displayed among athletes in the fast, intense, physical environment produced through sport; and while the athletic equality is appreciated, its value does not outweigh the physical repercussions. Consider the words of Angela: In my mid-40s – I got a couple of kicks in the face from the guys. Not meant, not hard – but then with the younger men they just had so much energy – not really recklessly, but to my body it was. It was not intended – but it was painful and I got scared. I don't think they were necessarily reckless, it was just how they played among themselves. And in a way, they were playing equal opportunity. They played with us like they played with themselves. So really I didn’t feel like yelling at them. So I just withdrew from playing. Here, Angela respects that her male opponents are not going easy on her. Then, when the physical risk reaches her limit, she negotiates that reality by removing herself from the sport space. She acknowledges the unsafe space and adjusts. In other instances, the question of physical safety was overshadowed by a sort of unsafe social environment. When social tension arose the sport space was less appealing. According to Samantha, “I liked least when we played and it just wasn’t fun. Other teams would start fighting. I don't remember exactly why… but I do know that happened.” Yanette also remembered experiencing social unrest on the field, “It’s really frustrating because – is it the personalities, character, do we not like each other? I would hate that.” Neither Samantha nor Yanette mentioned this tension being a direct result of gender. While they referred to the conflicts as their least favorite part of SCSA, at the other end of the spectrum, their favorite part of SCSA was the socially safe space. When met with inclusiveness, the camaraderie found in SCSA helped sustain participation of adult females in soccer. Yanette recalled one example of this camaraderie thusly: “Julie organized my (all-women’s) team! She was so welcoming! To university people and others – see was so nice and welcoming. And Janet…There were all these women that were just wonderful people”. Some described soccer like an old friend – a place/space where they felt at home. Overall, it was a comfortable social space and at times a haven or mental escape, as Angela noted: “I liked getting so lost in the game that nothing else exists. It’s a little comma in 116 life. Your regular life stops, everything stops. You get this wonderful moment in time. It is our time to do our thing”. Both the mental and physical beauty of the game produced a harmonious experience. “I love the patterns. The way you can move the ball up the field, three people, four people. And then as a defensive player it’s about cutting the angles”, explained Nina. And Yanette reflected, “you teleport. You don’t even know what you are doing. It’s like a dance – a physical and beautiful thing. The skill…and the goal is putting a ball in the net.” As ideal as these harmonic spaces seem, a physical reality could eventually overshadow the joy of participating. “I finally dropped out of it.... the way the men were playing and some girls were vicious. I had one take me out. And I was like – this is not the Olympics (Nina). In addition to the physical realities, power and politics are also a part of this beautiful game. Control of space. Hovering above freshly cut grass, lined fields, taught nets, striding cleats, and through balls of a soccer league – someone/thing is in charge. Be it a structure, ideology in the form of a person, board, business, and/or money – the control of space manifests in cultural entities such as sport. Prior to the establishment of SCSA, a city-run soccer league existed in South City. After a few too many injuries and a large increase in the city-league fees, a few men took it upon themselves to establish a physically safer and less expensive league. “They said the F with them we’ll create our own league” (Samantha). Physical and economic conditions spurred the men to move away from a publicly run league and form the not-for-profit, South City Soccer Association. This manifestation of sporting activism contained challenges – the largest hurdle being a place to play. The city parks were often already reserved by other sport leagues or were governed by a first-come-first serve policy (a system not conducive to an organized league). Access to sport spaces was ‘controlled;’ large, flat fields were a commodity in South City and the public sector capitalized on this, monopolizing many of the green spaces in town and granting access to those willing to pay a price. So while the social space (soccer players with a desire for inexpensive, friendly competition) was energized, it lacked any such public outlet for 36 its expression (name withheld, 2006). SCSA eventually found its home in an overgrown cow pasture in the corner of town owned by a wealthy land baron and soccer enthusiast in South City. SCSA entered a 10-year lease with the owner and like the soccer sequel to “Field of Dreams,” the members of SCSA

36 To protect the identities of my participants, I chose to withhold the name of the author of this unpublished manuscript. Hereafter I refer to the manuscript as “A History of South City Soccer Association” (name withheld, 2006). 117

(both men and women) transformed the overgrown cow pasture into a six-pitch soccer complex. In addition to their weekly recreational games, a few members were hired by the landowner to further develop soccer in South City. This included youth leagues, clinics, and equipment distribution. SCSA leased the land for 10 years; when the lease ended the property was sold to the city. The wealthy landowner requested that South City outsource the management of the land to a new soccer business in town, called Soccer Inc. This management agreement still exists to this day (i.e., 2013). Understanding the history and dynamics of the relationship between Soccer Inc. and SCSA is an important aspect of the culture of soccer throughout South City and specifically SCSA. According to the women, a shift occurred in the culture of SCSA when Soccer Inc. came to town; early on they referred to SCSA as “our club” because “we founded it.” (Laura). When Soccer Inc. took over management of the sport space, “it was like all of the sudden it wasn’t a community. It was a business” (Nadine). Simply put, “Soccer Inc. saw money” (Samantha). The for-profit mentality of Soccer Inc. was just one among the reasons the business was met with resistance. As soccer in South City transitioned from a grassroots community effort to a for- profit venture, a struggle over this social sport space manifested, “There were hard feelings between Soccer Inc. and South City Soccer Association. It became competitive. Soccer Inc. 37 wanted to grow and take over everything” (Laura). Further, Soccer Inc. was an outsider to this tight-knit soccer community. (They) brought in a lot of (their) people too. They weren’t South City people, they weren’t raised in this area. They hadn’t lived here long. They brought their idea. They had their ideas about how to do it and it was all changing (Samantha). The South City locals were (un)consciously threatened by a group who did things differently; Soccer Inc. was the “Other” in this case. Though “doing it differently” was among the mantras that drove the formation of SCSA and the integration of women in the league. But when it came to “their club” – different was not embraced. Still, throughout town “doing soccer differently” continued to spur the development of soccer in South City among females.

37 This focus on a community’s soccer fields / league reiterates Vertinsky’s (2004) supposition regarding “local gyms and sporting sites.” Vertinsky points out that local sport spaces (such as SCSA) “have tended to be neglected as sites of study” but these sites are ripe for research in that, “their various orderings of space embody constructions of race, place, gender, and identity” (p. 13). SCSA embodies such representations of cultural. 118

In the mid to late 1980’s (approximately when Soccer Inc. arrived in South City), South City had a solid men’s, women’s, and adult soccer coed league, a developing youth program, and boys’ high school teams. The women of SCSA had caught soccer fever and chose to invest time and energy in establishing girls’ high school teams. Almost 15 years after the passage of Title IX, a few schools in South City allocated funds for girls’ soccer programs. The women of SCSA were among the first girls’ high school coaches in South City and further developed girls’ competitive travel teams outside of the school-based programs. In addition to playing SCSA, refereeing youth games, Samantha invested a significant amount of time in a girls’ travel team. At this point, Soccer Inc. held summer clinics for high school teams and Samantha intentionally chose not to enroll her team in that clinic. “It was run by all men. How could I encourage and inspire my female players when all they had to look up to were men” (Samantha). Instead, Samantha travelled with her team to the University of North Carolina’s summer soccer camp. Their summer training at UNC coincided with the reign of its legendary coach, Anson Dorrance, and his prized recruit Mia Hamm (Litterer, 2011). Successful programs such as UNC and burgeoning soccer stars such as Mia Hamm have been credited with the surge of female soccer at the high school level in the late 1980s. Samantha’s travel team and the growth of girls’ high school soccer in South City is an example of that impact. Instead of celebrating the elite training opportunity for the girls of South City, Soccer Inc. made it clear they were insulted by the choice of Samantha and her players. If young athletes were traveling away from South City to be trained, then Soccer Inc. was losing business and losing control of the soccer space. Such a struggle over space can also be seen within institutions and on the bodies of the beings that comprise spaces and structures. Like the construction of social space, the construction of identity is affected by history and culture (Hall, 1996). Identities. The production of social space and the production identities are in constant conversation with one another. That is, identities construct social space at the same time the social space aids in the construction of identities. This can be seen in a social space such as sport. A cultural practice such as sport has the ability to unearth strong identities. The interacting identities within a sport structure such as SCSA often manifest in an exaggerated form. Sporting identities such as versions of masculinity, femininity, and athlete (or in this case soccer player)

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38 can be constructed and revealed through the nature of sport. When participating in SCSA, the identities that exist or rather are produced are embedded in the fields of play. Descriptions of the experiences of my female participants included versions of masculinity, femininity, and soccer player. Masculinities. According to my participants, there were certain masculinities that impacted their time in SCSA positively and others negatively. “Some men, they didn't hold back, but they didn’t try to kill you. They didn't try to put you in your place. But we had guys who were like that. And they made it very unwelcoming” (Yanette). Nina put it another way: There is a difference between those guys that really appreciate having you there because isn't it super cool that this is a chick that likes this game versus the guys that are putting up with the fact that because we are doing this coed thing we have to have these women (Nina). Both Nina and Yanette agreed that there were some “bullies” some “whiny men” and then also “very sensitive and cool men”. While these versions of masculinity influenced a match or a season, they overshadowed the driving force of sport, competition, movement, athleticism – all elements found in soccer players. 39 Soccer players/Feminists. The mere label ‘coed soccer’ signals gender; it acknowledges that there is a biological difference among bodies on the field. But when asked about whether or not being a woman impacted how they played with men, my participants’ responses suggested the game was more often than not a gender-neutral environment. “I would say I would forget gender – I was neither girl nor boy – I was a soccer player trying to get the ball. Trying to keep the ball from getting into my net. I was genderless” (Angela). Almost in unison, each woman reiterated this point from her own perspective: Isn't that fun? Because it really is the truth. We could be on teams with people you didn’t like. But once you started the game liking had nothing to do. I felt more like a bunch of

38 Here I follow Aitchison (2007) who suggests, The dialectic relationship, in which identities are constantly shaped and reshaped, made and remade, presented and represented, engages with sport as a dynamic social and cultural force. The mutable nature of sport, of identity, and of the relationship between the two offers possibilities for resistance, contestation, and transgression of hegemonic gender and sexual power relations (p. 1). 39 I should point out that none of my focus group participants directly labeled herself a feminist. However, it is evident (through their language, actions, and beliefs) that many would embrace such an identifier. This is in contrast to my interview participants in Chapter 5. While some of the 12 women I interviewed clearly displayed feminist agendas, I do not think they would embrace the term feminist. This issue is elaborated upon in Chapter 5. 120

Shepherd dogs... (driven by the mantra) ‘get the ball, get the ball.’ We were a pack (Yanette).

That is the nature of a team sport. You are a team – almost like a machine, each part is moving toward a common goal (Nina).

And that is also how the machine breaks down. It is really indicative of character. You know who is whiny, you knew who was going to be mean, you knew who was going to be sneaky. You knew who was going to give up. You could watch it play out on the field. That’s what was so wonderful about it. And that has nothing to do with gender. None of 40 those characteristics had to do with gender (Yanette).

(All you care about) is putting the ball in the back of the net. It feels so good! (Nina). As Nina spoke, women nodded and laughed, then Yanette added, “For everyone!” A common goal – putting the ball in the back of the net – drives soccer players. Certainly when conscious and aware, these social beings were challenged by the norms, ideals, and performances of identity. But ultimately, sport transcended any social struggles perceived (or, at least, seemed to in their retelling). Their mental states were those of soccer players. This identity was strong, so strong, that when their physical state limited their ability to play – their identity was in turmoil. “I stopped when I had to get my knee replaced. I am 62 and I played as long as I could… it’s a shame because I love sports” (Yanette). And when faced with realities of a society the privileges able/productive bodies– an injured or deficient body becomes an economic hindrance. Take the case of Angela: You know, things happen in soccer. You can get a black eye. And I was shooting weddings. I couldn’t afford to play in the morning, get hurt and in the afternoon shoot a wedding. Or having my eye out of focus – I couldn’t afford that (Angela). So a love for the sport is confronted by fear, “that is all of our fear. That your body deteriorates as you get older and you start double guessing it” (Yanette). For Nina, a lack of health insurance

40 The references to pack dogs and machines seem to lend itself to a 'place' of pre-meaning (Kristeva, 1980). For my participants it seems in such moments socially constructed ideas about gender don’t exist. The women liken themselves to inanimate objects and animals. This state of pre-meaning may be a more pure and natural definition of what it means to be a (female) soccer player for my participants. 121 impeded her play, “when I lost my job, I was like, no way.” The risk of injury and the financial repercussions of a disabled body overshadowed their soccer player identity, “putting the ball in the back of the net” was less important than putting food on the table. Still, around that dinner 41 table, at times they were confronted with female soccer playing images that brought forward their soccer player identity in a contentious way, “I can't even watch soccer. I miss it. I want to play…Well I sometimes look at it because I like it” (Yanette). The other women nodded in agreement, signaling their familiarity with a similar mental and physical struggle with their bodies, limitations (physical and social), and identities. “I played as long as I could…” (Angela). “But I would say, that if there was a team our age, I would play. I would miss the skill and aggression would change… But if there was an open 50s or open 60s. So it’s not quite the same soccer – but if I could play I would.” Angela is willing to negotiate the type of game that she once played just to be able to fulfill her soccer desires. Here, Angela’s dormant soccer identity yearns to be reawakened. In order to satiate the soccer identity of women like Angela, SCSA may need to opt for a sort of segregation according to age, ability, or gender. Yanette added, “I would go back to playing if there were people my age playing. But right now, there isn't and that is a shame because I love sports.” Enabling these soccer identities may come in the form of ordering bodies marked by age, ability, or gender. While critiqued as a cultural practice that subordinates certain groups, it often occurs through a certain hegemony in the form of cultural practices that are not forced upon individuals or structures, but instead produced by articulating individuals and structures. Practices. Most of the women began playing in their 30s; some women had spouses and children. Their initial involvement with soccer was with their sons’ youth teams. In the late 1970s, there was an effort to develop youth soccer in South City, and “youth” = “boys.” Then the 42 men of South City formed their league, next, the women. The sequence – boys/men then women/girls – is a familiar cultural practice that has existed in sport for some time, as well as

41 As stated in the introduction to this chapter. The 2012 Summer Olympic Games were taking place during the time of the focus groups. The U.S. Women’s Soccer Team’s matches were among the highlights of the media coverage. Most of my participants watched portions of the matches; the consumption of those matches had some influence on their responses. 42 After learning the game, the women of SCSA were instrumental in establishing girls’ high school soccer programs in South City. Boys’ programs had existed for years prior. In the mid to late 1980s (about 15 years following the passage of Title IX) girls’ soccer programs were established in some South City high schools. 122

43 today, and furthers the hegemonic sport environment. A female soccer player was not among sporting norms in the early 1980s. Therefore, to participate, learning the basic elements of soccer was the women’s first step. Samantha explained this dynamic: “We would have people teach us the game. Boys’ high school coaches came in and taught us. Some women had to be taught how to run. The women had never run before.” During this time, the women described how many of the men in SCSA came alongside their female counterparts. “The men were very supportive. And they would watch our games and encourage us and donate their time” (Nadine). Reiterating, one of Samantha’s points, they did not want the organization to be “like a boy scout / girl scout kind of thing;” ordering their gendered bodies into “women-only” and “men-only” divisions did not seem to help accomplish their purpose. They felt that complete segregation might not only reinforce but also exacerbate gender binaries (McDonagh & Pappano 2008; Williams, 2003). “We wanted to go in and show them that, see, we've got all of these women that want to play” (Samantha). This desire fueled their efforts, as Laura explained: We had a great work ethic. My husband who was the coach had us practice three times per week – rain or shine. And we played on the weekends. Sometimes we'd play a game and then played coed. So we were playing soccer a lot. Angela and Yanette held similar perspectives. Learning to run, kick, defend, and score was like second nature once they got a taste of the sport, they loved it: My friend played and one day she said, ‘why don’t you try it?’ She was playing... and I took to it like fish to water. I was like – that’s it – that’s it. (Angela).

I remember playing a game and it was raining and we were sliding in the mud. We were filthy and ecstatic – your little body gets to be animalistic in a fun flexible way…It’s an animal, but a calculated thinking animal because just think about all of the things you do elbow, dig, stride (Yanette). Whether integrating (coed) or segregating (men-only or women-only) the soccer playing bodies, the physicality and cultural practices on the field were fueled by a love of the sport, which is among the social and cultural factors that contributed to my participants choosing to participate

43 Contemporary examples include rugby, wrestling, and American football. Each of these sports is played on a macro level by males. Females have some involvement but the opportunities for women to play rugby, wrestle, or American football are much less. 123 in soccer. Further, entering a male preserve involved various gender negotiations: coping with ‘bullies;’ protecting their bodies physically when in contact with larger, faster, bodies; learning the game and training harder than their male counterparts in order to improve. The creation of an all-women’s travel team in addition to the coed league was one result of their gender negotiation. Another result of their gender negotiation was to eventually withdraw when the space became physically unsafe. Socially, the “bullies,” “whiny men,” and then also “very sensitive and cool men” (Nina and Yanette) impacted their experiences on the field, but ultimately, they negotiated such masculinities and were driven by the game, “getting the ball” (Yanette), and the satisfaction of “putting the ball in the back of the net” (Nina).

Whether the women were forced to negotiate their gendered bodies on the field or through the formation of a travel team, their goal aligned with their male counterparts – to develop soccer in South City. Their positive memories suggest that most of the men did not belittle or look past the women’s efforts but instead partnered with one another to achieve a common goal. This is not to say that women’s involvement and experience in SCSA then and now is a sporting utopia. As with any social structure there are struggles over space, with identities, and through practices. In any structure such as an Adult Coed Soccer league one of those struggles relates to gender. With a coed league, rules, policies, and management formations impact gender dynamics. Which leads to my third research question: In what ways does the operation of the league (governance, by laws, rules, and communication systems) of SCSA enable and contest female participation?

Managing Coed Soccer

Aiding in the cultivation of a more inclusive sport space with SCSA is among my intentions with this project. Understanding the history of SCSA from the perspective of those women who were instrumental in its founding was one of the first steps in this process. As a part of those conversations/focus groups that fostered a better understanding of not only chronological events but of the women’s experience in SCSA in the 1980s and 1990s, I sought to collect specific examples of the ways in which the operations of SCSA enabled women to play and ways in which SCSA’s governance, bylaws, rules, and communication systems ultimately discouraged some women from playing. Without direct prompting, my participants inserted

124 examples of policies, rules, and management styles that were liked or disliked when describing their experiences in SCSA. The following discussion focuses on the ownership of social spaces, uncertain organizational identities, and gendered policies as it relates to the operation of SCSA. Owning physical and social space. The early successes and shortfalls of SCSA stemmed from the dedication and commitment of the female soccer pioneers in South City and their male counterparts. They became the primary caretakers of both the physical and social space of SCSA. Nadine remembers “mowing the field, lining the field, and building the clubhouse.” Samantha and her husband would use their own lawnmower to maintain the soccer complex. Socially, they organized soccer tournaments, casual social events, and banquets. “We had fun awards and banquet. We would rent a place and decorate it. We would dance. The spouses came and we got to meet them” (Laura). Often, the social gatherings were family friendly. “We had socials – 44 almost monthly, bonfires and campouts, and trick or treating” (Samantha). The physical and social ownership they demonstrated and felt was a favorite aspect of SCSA. I think what I liked best was that it was development and we were all pulling it together. We were creative in terms of problem solving. It was an incredible sense of community. And every weekend – I looked forward to seeing my friends and being out there (Laura). Laura went onto emphasize “It was our club. We founded it.” From the women’s perspective, the next generation did not carry on that spirit. After she described SCSA as “our club” she added, “I don’t think the people who came along behind us felt that way.” The women seemed to point to the lack of leadership and commitment among their followers. It did not occur to them that it may have been their own management and culture of ownership that actually excluded others from carrying on their efforts. Their pride in building the organization overshadowed the need to share their vision and infuse the same active passion into others. I think (we) were the glue that did a lot of the work. I don’t think the other teams worked as hard as we did. We did a lot of extra stuff. And when we our (group) disbanded there wasn’t anybody to take our place (Nadine). Additionally, the emergence and growth of Soccer Inc., at the soccer complex and throughout the city, literally lessened the ownership of SCSA over their physical space. Eventually, the decrease

44 The campouts were ‘allowed’ during this time because SCSA managed the property. This was before Soccer Inc. took over management.

125 in physical ownership impacted the SCSA’s passion for leadership of something that was 45 becoming less and less “theirs.” As SCSA’s Old Guard transitioned away from “their club,” SCSA seemed to move away from its founding principles, which had the effect of producing a controversial organizational identity. Organizational identity in flux. In its early years the founding men and women of SCSA seemed to have a clear identity about who/what they wanted to be. SCSA’s identity was established through a mission statement. Reflecting upon SCSA’s philosophy in its early years, a founding male member writes: The purpose in establishing [SCSA] was to provide opportunities for the recreational level player and to eliminate some of the immature behaviors older players encountered in the city league. To help ensure this the association instituted regular clinics on how they wanted people to play. One of the rules instituted to prevent injuries was no slide- tackles. Even without slides, many novices have the tendency to “run through” tackles. So the association taught members how to play under control so no one got hurt. This became even more important once co-ed teams were established. The mantra became: “Remember we all have to go to work on Monday.” The clinics emphasized proper techniques in kicking, trapping and heading, and generally tried to help people feel more comfortable on the ball. A high premium was placed on sportsmanship and playing what was termed “sociable soccer.” The games were spirited and competitive, but they had a social dimension that at times trumped the game itself. In interviews with former [SCSA] members they often cited the cookouts and socials as being what they remembered—and valued most. To encourage maximum participation and the idea that everyone should play, the 90 minute game was broken into six 15 minute periods with the understanding that everyone should play a minimum of three. To prevent rivalries from developing, the association opted for a “fruit basket” approach, where the teams would reshuffle the players each season—or three times a year. This meant that over time everyone would play with and against everyone else. No statistics on the games were kept and did not crown a champion at the end of each season. Drawn games were not settled with a shoot- out, but considered an acceptable outcome. These principles seemed to work as intended

45 See previous discussion of the emergence and involvement of Soccer Inc. in South City Soccer. 126

(name withheld, 2006, p.7). My participants echoed this description. “SCSA was to be social, fun, and recreational. We had rules – you couldn’t slide tackle to prevent people from getting hurt and to help people who had never played,” (Samantha). They mentioned offering clinics for beginning players and stressed the family friendly environment that existed; children regularly watched their parents’ play and many grew up to be soccer players themselves. In its early years SCSA’s identity (identities) seemed more agreed upon than in recent years. While iterations of board meeting minutes, mission statements, philosophies, bylaws, and descriptions of play have not been well documented over the past three decades, my participant’s comments and the written account of the History of SCSA, are clear and consistent. But like any socially constructed structure, cultural forces can influence identity; a social structure is comprised of social beings whose identities are constantly shaping and being shaped. Some of the founding principles have been and are even currently being debated between members and leadership alike (more about these current debates will be discussed in Chapter 5). Evidence of unrest in SCSA emerged as my participants described their final years playing: “It (SCSA) started to develop factions – people had their opinions and that's when it stopped being as fun. It got to be petty” (Laura). Nadine added, “this is just my observation from the last few years I played. Is somehow or other – they seem to have taken the fun out of it. It was a fun way to spend Sunday afternoon. Is that still true?” Nadine’s question, “Is that still true?” is wrestled with at length in Chapter 5. But first, discussing the cultural practices that produced the sport space and its identity (identities) can help provide insight on how gender, power, and participation is managed in this fluid, physical field of play. Practices: Inclusive policies? In transitioning from an all-men to a coed organization, SCSA adopted policies with the intention of facilitating a smooth transition. While these policies did not necessarily fail, they resulted in unintended consequences; some fostered exclusivity and segregation more so than integration and inclusiveness. For example, Belinda recalls how: At that time, to get it to be more... to get some of the men more accepting of women players, only women could score (laugh). So they learned very quickly, if you stand here, I will bounce it off you. And things like that, it was just crazy, you know. Then we

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changed it to only women could score if it was inside the box and men could score if their 46 shot was outside the 18” (Belinda). Samantha too described this policy as her least favorite part of playing in SCSA: “You know what I hated – when they tried to establish that the only player that could score was a woman...We eventually gave it up.” Nadine agreed with Samantha’s discontent, “It was awful ...It wasn’t soccer. The guys would yell, ‘Get in the box!’ And they would stand around the edge and tell us what to do” (Nadine). This gendered practice was eventually replaced with another exceptional goal-scoring policy. “If men scored it was one point and if women scored it was two points. Suddenly, there were a lot of women as forwards” (Angela). Yanette quickly pointed out, “But isn't it interesting that they had to be encouraged.” Angela acknowledged Yanette’s critique, then recalled, “And also what really hurt – is when the ball came to you and you messed up – you messed up two points. So the pressure was on and the level of bitterness was just not fun.” So these inclusive intended policies actually created an exclusive, divisive, and even hostile environment. They were likely not consciously created to belittle or subordinate women. At first glance they seem to encourage women’s participation and ‘fair treatment.’ Some women likely supported the initial implementation of such gendered policies. But in practice they were actually constraining in the sport space. There was an unconscious assumption that women would benefit from bestowing on them an ‘exceptional’ status on the field; and the hegemony of the social space initially led the women to agree that having an exceptional status may increase their power on the field. But in most cases it simply didn’t. Such policies mark certain bodies as “Other;” that is, for them, a different set of rules applies. Their existence, presence, and participation are defined in contrast to “normal” or the dominant group. Their terms of existence are special therefore divisive and a representation of a problematic gender binary that is reinforced through sport and then reiterated in gendered performances. Such gendered policies still exist in the league today. Ironically, what is ‘affectionately’ known as the ‘girl goal’ policy is still in effect today and was brought up un-prompted by 10 of the 12 females I interviewed to better understand the current state of women’s coed soccer experiences in South City.

46 Belinda currently plays in SCSA’s coed league; she is about 60 years old and she was among the six women I talked with one- on-one as a part of my empirical strategy for Chapter 5. I chose to include portions of Belinda’s interview in this section of the chapter on account of the detailed descriptions of SCSA policies and practices in the 1980s and 1990s. 128

The following chapter includes the voices of those 12 women who have soccer experience and either currently play in SCSA, have played in SCSA then stopped, or are aware of SCSA but do not currently play in the league. The interviews build on the description of the history women’s soccer (with attention to South City) and SCSA. While my research questions for this project revolve around the current state of SCSA’s coed league, I thought it was important to talk with the women who came before. Understanding the social and cultural factors that have contributed to the participation and non-participation of adult females in soccer 20-30 years ago can provide insight on what has changed and/or remained the same over the years. Exploring the ways in which the negotiation of gender manifested in the past can shed light on how to most effectively cultivate inclusion at the current time. Further, learning about SCSA’s past operations can aid in current policy decisions. That is, analyzing past practices can help us better navigate current issues. I chose to begin with a collective history of women’s soccer in South City in the 1980s and 1990s because it reveals the inner-workings of soccer and its establishment throughout the city. Moreover, it is a narrative that through the shared memory work and feminist groundings provides us with historical account that is rarely captured by dominant mediums. Therefore, working with a group of women to share and interpret their versions on history keeps such accounts alive but also doubles as a feminist act of resistance. Through word of mouth some people had ‘heard’ that there was a thriving 11 v 11 women’s league in South City in the 1980s and 1990s. In my interview with Renee (a current member in of SCSA’s coed league), she challenged, “Do we really know that [an 11 aside women’s league in South City] existed? I mean, we hear about that but has anybody really talked to someone who played in it? I just have a hard time believing that existed” (Renee). I explained to her that that was also a part of my project and that I had spoken to six women who had been a part of the league. Renee’s comment reinforces that need for doing memory work. Further, such an accounts brought forward through memory work can serve as a learning tool and source of inspiration for adult female soccer players in the negotiating their gender, power and participation in the currently in SCSA’s coed league.

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CHAPTER 5

NEGOTIATING GENDERED SPORT SPACE

Within this chapter, 12 women (ranging in age from 25-60 years old) tell their soccer stories; each story has a beginning, some have ends, and others are continuing to add pages. The stories are physical, emotional, stressful, and joyful. There are similarities and differences among their experiences, reactions, and interpretations. Most voice perspectives that may have never been spoken aloud or even consciously processed. These 12 women began as acquaintances of mine and while I didn’t necessarily become best of friends with any of them, I think each of our 47 relationships was deepened (some more than others) through our exchange. On some level, we 48 became teammates – these were individual bonds/partnerships that produced a mutual understanding physically and socially: Physically – in playing with and against each other, a sense of understanding and respect established. Socially – messaging, texting, venting, and celebrating occurred that did not exist prior to our interactions through this project. My 49 teammates include: Cassie*: In her late 20s Cassie played in SCSA’s coed league for the first time after contemplating it for many years. She is married and works fulltime as a hairdresser and masseuse. She played soccer as a child and in high school, then sporadically in college on an

47 I know this not only on account of a genuine emotional bond that I felt but on account of physical acts that occurred following our talks. I received text messages and Facebook book messages from many of the women that I had not previously. We mutually agreed to connect in other ways – jogging together, participating in an adventure race, or watching a televised soccer game. One woman (a hairdresser by profession) brought me a ‘gift’ – a hair band to help keep loose ends of hair out of my face when playing. And many followed-up asking how my project was going and then sharing recent insights or anecdotes that they had experienced or noticed since our conversation (if I felt they were applicable, I asked permission to include those additional offerings in my project). 48 My use of the term “teammates” here is not to say all 13 of us united together as one team; rather, I got to know each one a bit better, and they got to know me. This deepened social level produced bonds (some stronger than others) which led to a mutual understanding that manifested physically and socially. 49 Participants are listed in the order that I met to talk with them. This order was not intentional but instead a result of access and scheduling. Eleven out of 12 of my participants were white and likely identified as Caucasian. One woman was born and raised in the United States by her Israeli immigrant parents; while she likely identified as white – she did address the influence of her Israeli father on her soccer experience. During my interview process, I attempted numerous times to connect with a black woman who had previously played in the league, but I was unable establish communication. I was not aware of any other non-white females playing in the coed league (or with previous soccer experience who do not play currently) during my interview process. As discussed in my methods section, race/ethnicity was not a focus in this project. I was open to its emergence as a theme, though this did not occur. Further, my mostly white sample is representative of the female population in the league. I did not directly ask the age or ethnicity/race of each participant. Similar to my reasoning stated in Chapter 4 (for not asking age) – this seemed like an impersonal and almost awkward question. I chose to allow their age to naturally arise if the participant chose to mention it. Signposts of age did arise within most conversations (other ages are approximations). 130 intramural team.

Belinda*: As a member of SCSA for over 30 years, Belinda is in her early 60s and played while raising two children (who are now adults) and working full-time. She is married, both Belinda and her husband are also active soccer officials.

Betsy*: A mother of one 2-year-old in her mid-30s, Betsy works full-time and coaches a local high school girls soccer team with her husband. Betsy is a goalkeeper and has played at soccer at elite levels including Division I Intercollegiate and in semi-pro women’s soccer leagues.

Shelly: As captain of her Division II college soccer squad, she led her team to a National Championship. Now in her mid-20s, Shelly is single and while she played in SCSA post-college, currently her running pursuits have taken the place of soccer.

Rose: Following a soccer career filled with physical and social challenges, soccer is no longer a mainstay in her life. She is in her late 20s, married with one child, and works full-time.

Sara*: Working full-time and pursuing graduate degree part-time, SCSA is a regular part of Sara’s weekly routine. She played in her youth, including high school, though not college. Sara is in her mid-20s and is single.

Colleen*: A part-time lawyer and full-time mother of two, Colleen is in her mid-30s. She and her husband both play in SCSA leagues. Colleen played soccer competitively throughout her childhood and in high school. She played on her college’s junior varsity soccer squad for two years then joined the women’s rugby team in her final years of college and through law school.

Molly: In her mid-30s, Molly is currently on a soccer hiatus on account of injury. She is married, without children and works full-time. She was involved in SCSA for about 15 years both as a player and board member.

Wendy: After one game in SCSA, Wendy took her talents to weekly pick-up games with friends. 131

She began playing soccer in middle school, played throughout high school, and then casually in college. Wendy is in her mid-20s, single, and works full-time while attending graduate school.

Renee*: As a working mother of two, Renee plays soccer multiple times a week. She was among the founding members of her high school’s first girls’ soccer team. Renee is married and in her mid-30s.

Bonnie: Currently raising an infant (along with a pre-teen), Bonnie’s soccer career started about three years ago. In her mid-30s, she took a break to pursue motherhood. She is married and works part-time.

Diana: Taking up soccer as an adult, Diana played for about 10 years. She is now, in her early 40s, married, with no children, and works full-time.

*Currently playing in SCSA’s coed league at the time of the interview.

A Note about Method

I purposely reached out to six women who currently play in SCSA’s coed league and six women who played soccer at one time in their life (most had experiences playing coed SCSA) and do not currently play in SCSA. Cassie, Belinda, Betsy, Sara, Colleen, and Renee were all 50 playing on a coed SCSA team at the time of the interviews. Shelly, Rose, Molly, Wendy, Bonnie, and Diana were not playing on a coed SCSA team at the time of their interviews. As I mentioned, these women were acquaintances of mine; I approached the majority of them through Facebook (some email or text if I had their contact information). Facebook made the contact process very easy. In some cases, I messaged my acquaintance and we set up a meeting for the following day. I attribute the ease of access to the state of technology, which provides the option to communicate immediately. An assortment of technological devices (mobile phones, computers, handheld devices with internet, texting, and email capabilities) exists and are available to this group of middle to upper-middle class women. Each of the interviews lasted approximately 60 to 90 minutes. They often took place in public places such as a coffee shop or

50 Cassie was not playing on a coed team at the time of this writing. 132 restaurant. A few took place in the homes of my participants with young children–during naptime, tummy time, and even through feeding time. Like the focus groups in Chapter 4, I let my participants choose the time and place in an effort facilitate convenience, comfort, and participant control. I began the interviews by explaining the purpose of my project while providing them with a copy of my participant consent form to sign. With each participant I used similar prompts to spur conversation. I also inserted follow-up questions when I felt it was applicable to my project to learn more about a certain topic or to better understand and therefore interpret their words. My semi-structured interviews with women who currently play in SCSA included the following prompts:  How did you get involved in soccer?  How/why did you get involved in SCSA?  Tell me about your experience in SCSA.  Tell me about your experience in SCSA as a woman.  What do you like best about the league?  What do you like least about the league? The interviews with women who have previously played soccer but do not play in SCSA included:  How did you get involved in soccer?  How long and at what level did you play?  Have you ever played coed soccer?  Why don’t you play in SCSA’s coed league? If the participant had previously played in SCSA’s coed league, I included the following questions:  Tell me about your experience in SCSA  How/why did you get involved in SCSA?  Tell me about your experience in SCSA as a woman.  What do you like best about the league?  What do you like least about the league? During their responses, I reacted (smiling, laughing, and nodding), shared my own

133 experiences, and in a few instances responded to questions asked of me by the participant (i.e. 51 “what do you think?” Or, “what have other people said?”). There was laughter, some anger, and even tears. Together, we candidly acknowledged what existed (physically and socially) – pleasant and unpleasant alike; we did not always agree or interpret the social identically. Their stories aided in a better understanding of a coed soccer space. Both past and present experiences contribute to their current soccer status; and while each story was unique, common themes arose. In the following chapter, I present pieces of their stories that I interpreted as communicating similar insights to the social world. I have identified reoccurring concepts expressed by my participants throughout the 12 separate discussions. After identifying these themes I will use sociological, cultural studies, and feminist theories to interpret the insights. These theoretical lenses will attempt to shed new light on a familiar site of physicality such as coed soccer. The following sections are organized in response to my three research questions.  What social and cultural factors contribute to the participation and non- participation of adult females in soccer?  How do adult female soccer players negotiate their gender in a coed soccer space?  In what ways does the operation of the league (governance, by laws, rules, and communication systems) of SCSA enable and inhibit female participation? I have organized my interpretations as they relate to the three main concepts discussed in my literature review: spaces, identities, and practices. As I stated previously, these three concepts constantly intersect: Each identified theme could likely ‘fit’ under more than one of the three main concepts (spaces, identities, and practices). In this project, I am concerned less with the rigid organization of theory, concepts, and themes; instead, I argue that the messiness of the social world lends itself to exploration, not finite definition. While the following sections are full of messy social descriptions, my intention is that these descriptions prompt mini epiphanies for the reader regarding the complex production of an adult coed soccer league.

Why (not) Play?

I begin by addressing my first research question: What social and cultural factors

51 The first time this occurred, I was caught by surprise but then quickly realized that creating a dialogue was my intention. Further, my participant felt comfortable asking me questions, which I interpret as a sign that they felt in control of the conversation and not like a ‘subject being studied by a dominating researcher.’ 134 contribute to the participation or non-participation in soccer among adult females? The choice to participate or not to participate in adult coed soccer is influenced by many things; while gender discourses may be intertwined throughout those influences, in this section I will not focus exclusively on gender. I will focus on the recurring responses I received regarding what factors encourage my participants to play and what factors discourage them from playing soccer. Whether directly or indirectly communicated through words or tones, I have interpreted their language and categorized their responses into insights relating to space, identities, and practices.

Social Places and Political Spaces

Socially satisfying spaces. When I asked: “What is your favorite part of SCSA?” the women overwhelming responded with narratives relating to camaraderie and social aspects of the league: I really like the idea of playing with my friends. Those games are a lot of fun. Those 52 games where you know... I mean I hate playing against the “Strikers” because it’s the “Strikers.” It’s also kind of great because I know Jim, I know Daniel, I know Jack. I know all of them. And I do like how I have made really good friends playing soccer here (Betsy).

I really like the team. I like being out there with everybody. I liked best how we were a unit – going out eating. And a lot of times we had parties at our house that we would get invited to…So the social aspect as well (Diana).

Most of my participants emphasized the social aspects of the organization, but that was not the sole driver of their participation. Playing soccer was foremost what attracted them to this space. The socializing around soccer was an added benefit. If the experience was solely about soccer or solely about socialization, it would not have had the same position in their lives or quite possibly any place at all. I think I like obviously soccer – I like the social atmosphere – we've got a really good group of people (Renee).

52 The Strikers are a team with a reputation of always having a lot of talented players each season and often winning most games in a season. 135

Because it’s recreational and all – the camaraderie makes the league fun. So I get a lot of benefit from it from exercise. It’s good stress relief and the friendships (Belinda).

The best thing I like about SCSA is the social aspect. I miss everybody because I can't play right now (Molly). Making friends may not have been a primary intention when joining, but for most, it seemed to be one of the main reasons they continued to play. Each of the women quoted above have participated in SCSA for a sustained amount of time (over five years). Therefore, time played a role in their perception of SCSA as a social outlet, and even extended family. It’s funny how we kind of grew up with everybody. It’s funny because we have a guy on our team. We’ve known him for a long time – when he was just married. And now he has had two babies – he never missed a game and now he does – birthdays, mother’s day (Diana).

I mean we've been friends for years. Just knowing people for years and years (Renee).

I like how many people I met through SCSA. And you know – running into people in the community even – at the grocery store or just knowing people. It was really how I made friends here. It was part of why I stayed for so long – to keep my sanity. This is my social group. I really like the people (Shelly). Knowing people in SCSA meant knowing people in South City. SCSA was not a secluded club or even reserved for one physical space but encompasses adults living and working in the community – raising children, attending school, grocery shopping. These simple, everyday rituals were enhanced when familiar faces appeared. Connecting to SCSA and connecting to the community occurred in unison. Best... the camaraderie was probably what I liked the best. I didn't realize how many friends I already had in SCSA. And so when I got there – I realized I wasn't alone – I didn't know a lot of people and I built relationships when I was there – they have really been valuable to me (Bonnie). Often, relationships were built and deepened off the field. The social atmosphere did not 136 begin and end with the referee’s whistle. Cultivating relationships occurred outside the space of physicality. While still a sport space, off the field physicality and competition took a back seat to socializing and camaraderie. As Bonnie explained: Drinking beer in that parking lot afterwards was a favorite because you get to relax and actually get to know the people you are playing with. The better I know those people the better I play. The people that were nice to me and willing to teach me were the ones that would stay and drink beer and give me pointers. Bonnie was put at ease when she recognized that people she already knew were playing in the league. This suggests that not knowing people in the space prior to entering it spurred some anxiety; Bonnie’s social anxiety lessened when she saw familiar faces. In a similar vein, Cassie’s hesitancy to come out for the league was produced in part by her unfamiliarity with others in the sport space. And then just not knowing anybody and already being uncomfortable. That makes me even more uncomfortable; just kind of don't know anybody there either. For a long time, it was just me and I didn't have a network of girls who played, so any thought of me going was just me and I am just not comfortable with that. Initially, for Cassie and others, SCSA was a “sport space” – it was a soccer league, one without any unique features or social beings. The women entered a space but ultimately returned to a place. SCSA became a place when it became comprised of social beings unique and identifiable to the women. The league went to from a “sport space” to a “place” where they interacted with social beings and built relationships. The distinction between “space” and “place” (Tuan, 1982; Vertinsky & Bale, 2004) contributes to the explanation of sport as a force of and for social production; the unique cultural elements making up each space are alive on the bodies that comprise the place. For these women, they see SCSA as a familiar place full of familiar social beings, and that is one of their favorite things about the league. It is not a sterile space; it is a meaningful place. Further, the place did not have concrete boundaries, the sport space blurred with the social space – be it at a postgame tailgate or weekly grocery outing. The spaces (sport and social) did not have boundaries. They were constructed alongside one another and enhanced the experience of participants in both spaces, ultimately producing a social sport place. An additional explanation for the women’s emphasis on the social aspects of SCSA relates to a history of female exclusion from sport. Leagues/teams cultivate a sense of belonging; 137 inclusion in sport equates to belonging (Walseth, 2006). However, in social arenas such as sport, women have been traditionally excluded (Messner, 2001). Therefore, when included in the space, the history of exclusion exaggerates the sense of belonging for women, which can result in a positive social experience (Walseth, 2006). The history of exclusion and nature of sport contributes to a space such as SCSA’s characterization as an important social element in women’s lives. Inclusion cultivates belonging and conversely a sense of belonging reinforces inclusiveness. Both exclusive and inclusive representations are found in sport at all levels. These sites are social spaces/social products… “in addition to being a means of production (they are) also a means of control, and hence of domination, or power" (Lefebvre, 1991, p. 26). Understanding such expressions of power and control can aid in a better understanding of the social space which can become a political space. Political pitches: “It’s who you know.” Within each of the interviews, expressions of power and specifically the politics of soccer were vocalized by my participants. Such narratives came in response to questions such as: “How did you get involved in soccer?” and “How long and at what level did you play?” These questions revealed stories embedded with expressions of power. When the politics of their soccer experiences surfaced, the descriptions/scenarios were relayed with passion and emotion. Listen to the words of Colleen: It was clique-y. It’s who you know... that’s what I don't like about it. The thing that pissed me off was...I saw people bring in forms the first game and they got on a team but I didn’t and I registered earlier. I think it is the social politics of how things work. The social politics of soccer were experienced at all levels play. Above, Colleen describes an encounter in SCSA. Many of the women described how political pitches shaped their soccer experiences in high school, college, and beyond: So (the new coach) stepped in and she had a lot of favorites so I got benched a lot. It changed – it turned into politics more than soccer in high school for me (Sara).

53 I tried out for a couple of W-League teams. And I ended up playing for the Banterville Athletics which is down in Banterville…And it was sort of annoying because it wasn’t

53 The W-League is a player development league, established in 1995. The W-League's amateur status provides a training ground for college players wanting to compete at the next level – semi-professional or professional women’s soccer leagues (currently professional opportunities only exist outside the United States). 138

54 what I thought it was. It ended up being mostly just IMG kids. The team ended up being the girls from IMG – the ones who pay to go to IMG – and just a chance for them to play against older women through the summer. I didn't realize that. I thought it was a straight up team. So I played less than an hour the entire season – it was really a terrible experience (Betsy).

And then I tried out for club (soccer) at South City College, but I didn't make it because no one knew me. It was all who you know. I was new. So I didn't make club but I played intramural every season (Sara). The politics of soccer manifested in decreased playing time, getting cut, and even scholarship revocation. In these instances power was exercised by an individual – that individual may or may not align with others, but in each situation the individual managed to get her/his agenda through, but often at the expense of women’s lives. (The new coach) wanted my (scholarship) money. He wanted my 10 grand to give to other players. He had said – I am going to make an example of one of you. The team remembers him saying that. I was the example (Rose). Each description sounded like a deflating balloon. For a time, the women’s impressions of soccer was pure… purely physical; soccer turned on skill and effort. Then at some point, their ideas of soccer were re-directed; the meanings of certain signs and symbols changed through their associations with language. Their interpretations of soccer evolved when influenced by the construction of new meanings attached to soccer’s sign and symbols. For these women, at one time an iteration of a phase of “pre-meaning” existed in regards to their understanding of soccer. The women understood soccer as a sport – a physical game with rules, something they enjoyed. They believed the best players made the team and if they worked hard enough they would succeed. This state of pre-meaning was ruptured when they were confronted with dynamics of power and politics. When my participants saw decisions being made that were politically influenced, their love of the pure game was tainted. For some, the intersection of politics and sport is most often seen as a negative reality; I

54 IMG Academy, owned by sports and entertainment company IMG (a.k.a., International Management Group), is a sport academy that offers camps, weekend programs and year-round sports programs for elite athletes to train. The cost to attend is very high and focus on sport is intense. Many professional athletes were trained at IMG Academy. 139 mostly agree with this perception. But when wrestling with my participants’ words alongside theory, the recurring themes discussed above (socially satisfying spaces and political pitches) pointed to a hegemonic relationship among the physical, social, and political aspects of soccer. Most of the women talked about how much they enjoyed the social aspects of SCSA. They made friends and enjoyed playing with their friends. Bonnie, for example, pointed out: “The better I know those people the better I play.” At first glance this comment is innocent and even logical. But I kept coming back to it, because I felt that this simple expression held great meaning. It was with disdain that some of my participants described their negative impressions of soccer by saying “It’s who you know.” At the same time, Bonnie’s comment “the better I know those people the better I play” also makes sense. Be it soccer teams, business transactions, law-making, or school board appointments – individuals “play better” with people they know. This can create a system of power that keeps one type, class, race, gender, player, coach, or team in power. And while clearly it is a system of “playing favorites,” that system has been acknowledged as a successful strategy because as Bonnie put it, “the better I know those people the better I play.” I am not arguing that constantly surrounding oneself with people you know and like is productive. Instead, I am explaining how my participants voices help understand how these systems of hegemony manifest. Awareness and understanding of such systems of power can better help recognize them in our midst and then more consciously decide how to navigate a political, social, and physical world. Social spaces of physicality can both enable and contest girls/women from playing soccer. Entering and negotiating these spaces can be challenging. While their soccer experiences may be positive or negative and likely a mixture of both on account of instances of socialization, acceptance, relationships, politics, and/or exclusion – collectively and simultaneously those instances shape one’s identity(ies).

Identities

My approach to identities in this section is grounded in cultural studies’ emphasis on contextualism. I spoke with grown women – each of whom have a soccer history (or demonstratively put – a soccer her-story). The historical forces and social formations in both their past and historically produced present make their identities possible (Carrington, 2009). These identities are not finished products but rather ongoing productions that began a long time ago and will continue to shift, mold, develop, and be influenced by the physical, social, cultural,

140 and political world (Hall, 1996). Social structures such as sport are often involved in the production of identities; that is, lived experiences shape identities. As my participants discussed their lived experiences, it became clear that their identities and soccer experiences were directly linked. For example, when reflecting on their adolescence, their consumption of soccer was defining: High school soccer was really good; it was like soccer was my everything. It was how I like measured my worth (Colleen).

It’s funny looking back how consuming it is and you can be so blinded. But I think people need that to grow. So I would never take it away. But at the same time, I was like damn – what could I have been doing? Because some people... so you got a degree in soccer? And I was like yeah – pretty much. That’s what you do – you give your life away (Rose). Such a defining practice and intimate relationship with a social structure like soccer did not expire. The attractive elements of soccer involvement were ingrained into their identities. So, then as adults, after a possible soccer hiatus, the women gravitated back to soccer to ‘find themselves.’ Even their loved ones acknowledged that soccer was like a haven and a source of happiness: I needed to get back into it. I missed it, I needed my own thing. John and I were riding bikes all of the time, motorcycles all the time, but I needed my own – something that would make me happy. So I was like I need to find soccer again (Renee).

I love soccer. My mom, when she found out I was playing soccer (again), she was so happy because she knows how much I love it and that it was a big part of my life (Wendy). For these women soccer was not merely an exercise in physicality, it was a social force, an embedded discourse running through their lives. Soccer was a technology of the body; that is, sport participation helped construct their identity (Cole, 1993). “Technologies of the self” is a Foucauldian concept which points to devices/techniques which make possible the social construction of personal identity (Foucault, 1988). Soccer participation was one such device; so when this device was less accessible on account of one’s life stage (transitioning out of highly 141 structured soccer programs available in school) or on account of injury – these women’s identities became a site of struggle: I can’t even go out and watch because I can’t do it. A lot of people on my team are like come on – at least come watch. And at first I did. But it sucked. Everyone is running and sweating and having a good time and I was like, agh – it was tough emotionally (Diana).

Then in college I gained a little weight and I just wasn't the same. So my junior year – when I didn't make the varsity team, I played rugby. So me and a few friends – we called ourselves the soccer rejects and we joined the rugby team (Colleen). Here, Colleen negotiated her exclusion from college soccer by substituting one sport with another. Though, from Colleen’s perspective – soccer was still ‘better’ it was an ideal that she had fallen short of achieving and therefore labeled herself a “reject.” Whether exclusion from soccer is negotiated with humor, sarcasm, or depression, the role and toll soccer takes within females’ lives can be deep. Rose’s comments are especially instructive: The second (injury) did me in mentally. It really screwed with my brain and my body. I didn't get back at it as quick or hard. And really I think I have been a different player ever since. When you love something so much and it’s kind of like taken from you and out of your control – that just totally...Oh my I am going to cry. For my participants, soccer was a significant part of their lives and thus a significant part of their identities. When soccer was not available physically, their sense of self was impacted emotionally and socially. Their corporeal shells became a sort of barrier to soccer playing. When their physical world and social world were not aligning – a physical/social struggle manifested. From a cultural perspective this struggle is inevitably embedded through the consumption of messages from ‘innocent’ cultural forces. Entities such as the Women’s Sports Foundation go to great efforts (researching, developing programs, and executing marketing campaigns) communicating that sport participation is a positive practice for girls. That is, girls who participate in sport are more ‘successful’ than girls who do not participate in sport. One critical analysis of such a well-intentioned message suggests that teaching girls that they can control their own destiny by participation in sport is quite problematic (Heywood, 2007). What happens when sport is not physically available to girls (who then become women)? If they do not/cannot

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55 play, are they failures? Returning to my participants, most experienced a barrier to soccer participation in their lives; be it an injury, transitioning out of school-based sport, skill level, life stage (motherhood), or time constraints. In other words, at a certain point in their lives, they were either physically or socially unable to participate in soccer. As girls and as women – these barriers impacted their identities. For example, when sidelined by an injury for an extended period of time, my participants relayed emotional struggles; they could not do something they loved, something that defined them. Playing soccer was “everything” and when it was taken away they experienced a great loss, a loss that for some equated to failure. In one aspect they were either soccer players or failures. Negotiating alternative identities was and for some still is a struggle. Playing soccer was the ‘right’ thing to do; socio-cultural forces created a perfect storm of opportunity (i.e. Title IX and the creation of high school and college programs), popularity (success of and pop cultural attention to women’s U.S. National Team), and even nationalism (idealizing all-American girls). Popularity and nationalism. The U.S. Women’s National Team’s Olympic and World Cup victories contributed to the foundation and rise of girls’ and women’s soccer. The success and growth of the sport among females contributed to the interest in creating a women’s professional soccer league. Alongside the National Team’s spotlight and the eventual establishment of a women’s pro soccer league in the United States (WUSA), came nationalistic undertones. Messages linked joining the girls’/women’s soccer trend with being an all-American girl. Stakeholders in the WUSA suggested that consuming soccer equated to being a good citizen. This message was embodied in the WUSA’s (the first women’s professional soccer league in the United States) partnership with the American Youth Soccer Organization (AYSO). The campaign targeted young consumers and suggested that soccer/sport/WUSA is the all- American ‘thing’ to support. These efforts worked. Rose in particular noted how “I use to and still do worship the ground Mia Hamm, Michelle Akers, and all of those World Cup Women walk on” (Rose). Such rhetoric furthers the definition of a “good citizen” (even “good person”) is one that supports or plays sport. These cultural messages seem innocent but conditioning individuals to idealize a certain ‘type’ of fan/athlete/citizen is problematic, because not everyone can, will, or wants to

55 This critique, put forth by Leslie Heywood (2007), begins with Heywood recognizing the great strides entities such as the Women’s Sports Foundation have contributed to female sport participation. 143 play. As Rose continued: “You know as a little girl you want to be in the World Cup, but you never thought that would happen, so the next best thing is to play at a good college”. It is important to note that in this project I claim that their marketing efforts worked specifically among white, middle (and upper) class females, of a certain body type and ability. My participants were all white, middle class, suburban females. The same messages of popularity and nationalism surrounding soccer were not broadcast to a very diverse audience, either socio- 56 economically or racially. Soccer fields are not thriving in urban areas known as concrete jungles. So the green spaces of white suburbia were a more lucrative site to convince little girls to try to become the next Mia Hamm, Alex Morgan, or Hope Solo – all white, able bodied, middle/upper class females. These cultural elements layered upon a female body made for a ripe marketing target. There was a certain iteration of femininity projected by U.S. Women’s World Cup Soccer, the WUSA. Achieving this feminine soccer ideal was reinforced in messages sent by sponsors, advertisers, companies, and stakeholders of elite levels of women’s soccer. The ideology was in place, clearly constructed; in addition the increased opportunities to play soccer at the high school and college levels also aided in the construction of these sporting femininities. Opportunities’ unintended consequences. Within many of my interviews, participation in soccer at the college level was discussed. This topic arose primarily among my participants 57 ranging in age 25-35. The opportunity to play intercollegiate soccer was not widely available until the 1990s. Additionally, girls’ soccer teams were among the new additions to high school athletic programs throughout the 1990s. So the existence of and opportunity for girls’ high school players to become women’s college players has only been a reality on a macro scale for 58 the past 15-20 years. Whether or not a college soccer career was a part of my participants’ stories proved to be a reoccurring theme throughout our discussions. That is, my participants, age

56 Cole and Giardina (2013) point out that the 2011 U.S. Women’s World Cup team did not feature any racial or ethnic minorities, and point out that television commentators broadcasting the Final against Japan seemed to go out of their way to remind viewers that several of the key players (e.g., Alex Morgan, Hope Solo, etc) had modeling futures or marriage proposals to look forward to. 57 Title IX, legislation passed in 1972, has been accredited with the increase in female athletic opportunities. Women ages 25-35 grew-up post Title IX, therefore their youth, high school, and college experiences were more likely to include sport participation opportunities than females growing up in the 1970s (pre Title IX). Full implementation of the law has been gradual (40 years after its passage, compliance is still lacking) but nonetheless, the increase in participation numbers following the passage of Title IX has been dramatic (Acosta & Carpenter, 2012). 58 This is actually quite a ‘short’ history in comparison to other sports played by women at the collegiate and high school levels; sports such as tennis, gymnastics, equestrian and even track and field have been played by women for over a century in the U.S. (Markovits & HDianarman, 2006). 144

59 25-35, had the opportunity to pursue soccer in college. Their attempts/decisions to play (and often where to play) at the next level were referenced as a milestone in their lives: I was going to play in college…Well I got an offer to play at a smaller school down south, but I didn’t want to go that far. Then I did actually go to a school closer to home. And just kind of did little tryouts and they offered me a walk on position. But I just um…I don't know... I just didn't want it to become a chore. It was something that I really enjoyed doing. I just heard a lot I guess about collegiate sports and I wanted it to still be enjoyed.... I guess…if that makes any sense (Cassie). Cassie was aware of the large commitment college soccer required. She liked playing soccer, and she benefitted from the increased opportunities at the youth and high school level. While she still had an interest in playing a sport she enjoyed, she was hesitant of her enjoyment becoming an obligation. With increased opportunities came increased pressure, a path Cassie chose not to explore. For others, their college soccer experience seemed like a natural transition and look back on the experience fondly: I went to a college where we won the national championship my senior year. I was captain. It was a small school, but we won the DIII National Championship. I was a four- year starter so that was like the culmination of my soccer career (Shelly). The increased opportunities for females to play at the collegiate level is often viewed as an advancement in women’s sport (see, e.g., Acosta & Carpenter, 2012), but what also needs to be acknowledged is that with increased opportunities can come social pressure, stressful decision making, and the fear of regret. As Sara reminded me: I got offered a partial scholarship to a college and I turned it down because I did not like soccer at that point. I was frustrated with my travel team and with my high school team and everything that was going on. And I was like, I just want to go. It is the biggest regret of my life – that I didn't play college soccer. Betsy had a similar memory about transitioning from high school to college: And this is the most horrible thing – I look back on it and want to slap myself in the face. During the spring of my senior year, I would come home every day and there would be

59 Attending college was a part of all of my participants’ stories, ages 25-60; further many of my participants had also obtained masters and doctorate degrees. While not a focus of this project, it is important to recognize that my participants were of an educated class. They were all white middle and upper-middle class women for which higher education was a cultural norm. 145

messages on our answering machine from coaches that wanted to talk to me. I was so annoyed I would be like AHHH, I am so annoyed! I am so tired of this! I want someone else to make up the decision already. It was just so – I don't know what my problem was – I was a jackass. So this guy... I figured he had gotten a letter from me. So he was like, yeah – we want to get you up for a visit. I go up there and was like whatever – it was a ten-hour drive away from my family so that was good. That was exactly how much thought went into that decision to go to college there. I am appalled – that was the worst decision I ever made. These were emotional, anxiety provoking milestones in my participants’ lives. Their descriptions 10-15 years after the experiences were still raw. The decisions were (and for some still are) burdensome because playing soccer was/is embedded in their identities. For them to not play is to be/feel like a different person. Additionally, if they chose not to play, there was a need to rationalize their choice; it was almost unnatural for them not to play – because success in sport 60 meant playing at the highest level possible. To turn down such an opportunity was to fail. So while presenting women with the opportunity to play elite levels of soccer (college and 61 professional) is celebrated, it is important to view these ‘strides’ from a critical perspective. On the surface, women’s college soccer is seen as an ideal representation of female athleticism, but beneath those ponytails and name-brand cleats are teenagers making complicated life decisions wrought with pressure and anxiety. Whether consciously or not, most of these girls (now women) were trying to ‘do the right thing’ and that may have meant being an all-American soccer playing

60 Further, in my observations of sporting capitalism, great value (socially, culturally, politically, and economically) is placed on a sustainable professional sport league comprised of elite sporting bodies while very little is value is placed on a recreational sport league comprised of bodies of varying ability. This leads me to two related though different critiques: (1) a women’s professional soccer league has yet to survive in the United States. Some suggest that a league’s inability to prosper financially further solidifies the secondary status of soccer (and even women’s sport) in the U.S. I reject this notion and capitalism’s overemphasis on financial profit. Success in sport should not be evaluated by bottom lines but instead – the active healthy bodies and minds sport reaches. In the midst of a weight, activity, and healthcare debate – sport for the masses seems like a much more productive use of resources than sport for the elite (and its sedentary spectators). (2) I challenge the stakeholders (financial supporters and potential female professional soccer players) to place the same amount of effort (time, money, talent) into developing girls/women’s soccer among all ages and abilities. I would rather see 50,000 30-50 year old women playing soccer regularly, than 500 professional female soccer players sporadically drafted for seasons wrought with financial drama. I believe the 50,000 30-50 year old mothers, sisters, aunts, cousins, and friends would have a much greater impact on the status of girls/women in sport than the 500 elite role models in a league continuously criticized for its minimal profit. 61 Here I am not arguing definitively that women’s collegiate athletics causes more harm than good. I am suggesting that we become more aware of some of its negative repercussions. I do not think a solution is to ‘do away’ with high school or college women’s sport, but make an effort to understand its consumers (girls/women) and how best to cultivate sporting femininities that are conscious of the social and cultural structures that exist and have the ability to shape their identities presently and for years to come. 146 female, a sporting citizen/consumer, or just a female trying to navigate the social and cultural challenges of womanhood. In any case, their sense of self was produced by power struggles surrounding sport.

Practices

Mean girls. A recurring theme in my conversations was the off-putting impact of females on my participants’ soccer experiences. This was not true in every case/soccer her-story (reflection on past soccer experience), but it was more often discussed than any specific mention of damaging males. The bad thing – the hard thing for me was the soccer transition. The girls did not like the fact that I was not there for the preseason. And I still got on the team. Initially, they were really not nice. They were really snooty. It was just was weird things. I would sit on the bus by myself and then we'd stop for dinner and everyone would sit together at like Wendy's – and I remember one time, they put a bunch of brochures in my backpack. And I was like, what the hell is this? The first year was tough (Colleen).

I was 11 at the time (and I had to) join the Under-15 rec team. And at the age I was developing and there were all these older girls that I was more developed than. I never wore white. So it was just awkward… And I kind of got outcast right from the beginning (Rose). Negotiating gender, power, and participation in youth soccer and high school soccer can expose children to the perils of interpersonal politics and power relations in sport. Whether they realized what was happening at the time or upon reflection 10-20 years later, lessons were learned and for 62 the most part “mean girls” (and sometimes women) did not become a permanent barrier to soccer participation. They recognized the barrier, negotiated it, and learn from it. Sara and Wendy shared similar experiences in this regard: …And so another girl's mom who was a teacher at the school stepped up. But she knew nothing about soccer and had favorites. We were like a Division I school – won districts every year – we were competitive every year. So she stepped in and she had a lot of

62 The term “mean girls” refers to the pop cultural portrayal teen girls as socially aggressive, manipulative, and mean within female friendship circles (Behm-Morawitz & Mastro, 2008). 147

favorites so I got benched a lot. It changed – it turned into politics more than soccer in high school for me (Sara).

Girls can be more catty. In a way I think it can be more intimidating... at (a young) age, not at all ages.... Actually, I am not proud of this, but my freshman year I quit in the middle of the season because there were girls being catty. But after I quit, I was so mad at myself. I regretted it (Wendy). 63 Catty/snooty/mean girls marked my participant’s soccer stories. This trend supports Hall’s description of cultural practices as “the active process—which is at the same time the process through which men (women) make their history” (1980, p. 62). As grown women, the mean girls of the past proved to play roles in the historically produced present. They acted as a mode of oppression. I think mean girls are often competitive girls (though I do not think all competitive girls are mean girls). The nature of sport certainly fosters a competitive spirit, but not all female athletes are mean (or competitive for that matter). This “mean girls” social phenomenon is not specific to sport but may be part of a broader product of patriarchy. In their struggle for power (i.e. recognition, attention, approval), females compete with one another. The 64 prize may come in the form of approval or it may manifest as a cultural practice unconsciously taught then social embedded and iteratively preformed (Butler, 1990). Competitive/mean girls can be considered a gender performance; some females judge, compete, and tear down individuals regularly. Such reiterative acts can lead to these performances becoming equated with girl/woman/femininity. As suggested above, this struggle for power may be one product of patriarchy; most would likely acknowledge ‘mean girls’ as a negative social product. However, it is only one among other products of patriarchy, some of which may be considered positive, and others of which a binary categorization (positive/negative) seems inadequate. For example, one such nonaligned product is the existence of mentoring males in my participants’ soccer stories. Mentoring males. Most of the women I spoke with talked about key figures in their lives

63 It is important to note, that the mention of mean soccer girls, were largely a memory; in their current soccer/life experiences, my participants did not indicate other females being soccer deterrents. 64 One source of approval may come from a male coach. This influence contributes to the explanation of the next section, “Mentoring males.” 148 who encouraged them to play soccer; the vast majority of those key figures were males, including fathers, brothers, coaches, or husbands. Each of the women, who offered this information, relayed it in a positive and appreciative manner: They seemed genuinely grateful for the mentoring male in their life. The mentoring came in both direct (i.e. coaching / parenting) and indirect forms (siblings’ or husbands’ participation). I just loved (soccer). I just picked it up and I had a really good coach who like stuck with me and really coached me one on one. That made me enjoy it a lot more and develop a passion for it. I was often the only one a practice and he would teach me ball handling skills. I was kind of behind going into it since I hadn't played all my life. But having that one on one really helped me develop my skills. Which enabled me to start in high school and play throughout high school (Wendy).

My coach Dave was very inspirational….I was injured most of my senior year, but still went to all practices and games and acted as captain. At the end of the season, Dave named me MVP – Most Valuable Person. That felt good. (Rose).

Basically I went to play for the coach. The coach was awesome. He was just amazing (Betsy). The influence of coaches is evident; their position commands a significant amount of power that quite literally affects lives. In addition to coaches, family members can shape one another and influence one’s sporting pursuits. So when I was four, my dad and mom enrolled me in soccer because we are from Israel and it’s really big there. So they wanted me to play a sport and my dad was obsessed with soccer. So I joined and he was my coach (Sara).

My dad really pushed me in soccer to try out for new teams and everything (Shelly).

Well, I think my brother was playing – you know older brother and younger sister. From what my parents tell me, I had to do everything he did. So I wanted to play soccer (Rose).

Both of my brothers played and I kind of wanted to do what they did all the time 149

(Cassie).

I got involved in soccer, especially SCSA, because my husband Luke. He has played since he was eight. We were in South City and didn't have a lot of friends and we wanted to do something together (Diana).

One analysis of the recurring reference to encouraging males in females’ soccer experiences is to recognize this patriarchal system at work and consider its hegemonic implications. Acknowledging that males’ influential roles (coaches, fathers, brothers) possess a certain power that impacts females (for good or bad) is to acknowledge a socio-cultural system of power that exists. Exploring these hegemonic relationships can lead to a better understanding of power – exclusion and inclusion. Although the mention of male mentors was not a great surprise, I was surprised that female ‘mentors’ / encouragers / influencers were rarely mentioned. None of my participants referred to a female coach as a positive source of influence; two women mentioned their mother being involved; no one mentioned a sister’s role in their soccer experience; one woman referenced female players on the U.S. Women’s National Team as an inspiration. Meanwhile 10 of the 12 women I talked with emphasized the positive role of the males in the soccer experience. Contextually, the history of women’s soccer participation may partially explain lack of female soccer role models. Eleven of the 12 women I interviewed were all of a post-Title IX generation (age 25-35). Further, I do not claim that 12 women comprehensively represent an entire population in women’s soccer. But I do think it is problematic even on a small scale among these twelve women. The role of women in their soccer experiences was minimal. If they did not experience encouragement from women, will they encourage others? If they did not see adult female soccer players or coaches, will they be adult female players or coaches themselves? Some maybe yes; some maybe no. In either case, these are among the “forms of oppression and imbalance, thus teaching us to address questions about whose interests are regarded as worthy of debate” (Steiner, 1989, p. 158). This subtle gender imbalance in the soccer stories of my participants brings forward an issue worthy of debate: Does patriarchy enable or contest female soccer participation and involvement? In this physically, culturally, and politically complicated social world, I do not think there is a universal ‘answer’ to this question. Instead, I merely 150 suggest further exploration and debate of gender and sport. This leads me to my second research question which focuses on my participants’ soccer experiences and the ways in which they negotiate their gender in the sport space.

Negotiating Gender in Coed Soccer

The mere label “coed” soccer acknowledges a gendered arrangement; in the case of 65 SCSA, bodies are marked male or female / man or woman. When immersed in such a sport space, these marked bodies negotiate the gendered space socially, politically, and physically. When navigating SCSA’s coed soccer league, my participants revealed the ways in which gender was articulated. Physically, culturally, and politically, the gendered bodies discursively constructed the social space through social processes. To further explore the construction of this sport space, as well as the cultural bodies and social processes that comprise it, I asked each of my participants to describe their experience in SCSA’s coed soccer league as a woman. While their responses varied, common themes did emerge. Once again, I have organized their responses as they relate to the physical/cultural concepts: space, identities, and practices. My participants’ reflections and often emotional descriptions of their experiences in SCSA aided in a better understanding of my second research question which inquires: How do adult female soccer players negotiate their gender in a coed soccer space?

Space

Navigating a masculine domain. Many of my participants had played soccer for over a decade – more often in female-only spaces, but also in coed spaces. In their descriptions of SCSA’s coed league, male dominance was clearly articulated physically and socially. The orchestration of social relationships in a space such as sport has been recognized by many scholars (see Cahn, 1994; Connell, 1987; Hargreaves, 1994; Kane, 1995). Sport’s cultural geography as it relates to gender has also been well documented (Bale, 2003; Connell, 1995; Crosset, 1990; van Ingen, 2003). It has been described as a masculine domain (Messner & Sabo, 1990) and a male preserve (Dunning, Birrell, & Cole, 1994), though this conception has largely referred to the social and cultural dynamics of sport. I contend that sport’s gendered character

65 I recognize a gender binary is problematic (Butler, 1990). That is, categorizing all bodies as either male or female excludes bodies – physically and socially. Challenging the gender binary set forth via “coed” label is a worthy cause. But for the purposes of this project, I acknowledge the coed/binary representation for purposes of description of the league, though describing and acknowledging the arrangement does not mean I fully support the limiting label. 151 goes ‘beyond’ social and cultural ideologies; the gendered space is also represented physically. Sporting bodies and spaces are organized and segmented – physically – thereby further reinforcing gendered systems of power. Further, the women’s recollections suggested the ways in which they negotiated this space. Physically, the women acknowledged a gender difference and as a result attempted to physically navigate the sport space. “Head balls – I will never go for a head ball in SCSA unless no one is around me. There are so many times I back away because there is a giant man who is going to crush me” (Shelly). Larger men in the league may be able to be avoided, but the general nature of play is more difficult to circumvent. As Shelly continued: Some guys play real aggressively. I would get tired of that sometimes. And I get scared too – especially when I got big into the running. I could play women's and run but I couldn't play coed and run because there was more chance getting hurt playing coed than playing women. Avoidance of such physically dangerous encounters is an example of Iris Young’s (1980) sociological analysis of how female bodies move differently than male bodies. According to Young, female bodies move self-consciously and even constrained. She ties these constrained movements to women’s place in society as “Other.” That is, “woman” is “the inessential correlate to man, a mere object” (Young, 1980, p. 43). This version of subordination exists in society and in sport. Specifically, it manifests in masculine domains such as sport. As “Other” on the soccer field, women back away from headers (a soccer norm) and cease playing on account of overly aggressive males demonstrating dominance. Both Bonnie and Shelly discussed this notion in detail: Some of the guys on the other team were just really rough. I kind of felt like they were playing they were still in high school when it’s supposed to be recreational. So I felt like at times, even though I want to win just as much as they want to win – you're getting a little too intense. Even guys on the other teams would give you an elbow to the boob – just to show you this is our game. Sometimes it wasn’t intentional. But there were times that it was (Bonnie). Male dominance was displayed not only was physically but also socially. Oh my god, it was a nightmare…because I had strong personalities on my team. I had Ryan and Tom and men who are more aggressive… And they didn't listen to me half the 152

time. I tell them to play a position and they just do their own thing. I would tell them to sub out and they wouldn't listen (Shelly). Such social struggles were frustrating experiences and led the women to withdraw. Some women negotiated the male dominated soccer space by physically removing themselves from the contentious space. The thing I like least about it is pick-up and I don't go anymore. It got to the point where I was just completely fed up with it. Because the guys don't sub off and nobody plays positions and I was just like, I don't need to deal with the drama anymore. So I just stopped going (Molly).

I never go because again, the guys come out and they just want to play with themselves. I hate that (Shelly). These women did not “kick, scream, or make a scene:” They did not draw attention to their struggle. Instead, they stopped playing. This means of negotiation further supports Young’s sociological analysis of female bodies. She points out how being labeled “Other” leads to constrained performances that produce a form of female hesitancy that (consciously or unconsciously) acknowledges the male domain and avoids it. Of course this analysis does not apply to all women. Some of my participants challenged the gendered imbalance and confronted their male counterparts regarding their label as “Other.” I went out there when I first moved here. I went out. All the teams had already been formed so they put me on a team that needed a girl. I didn't have a good experience with that. The guys were ball hogs. They would come back and play my position. I actually finally told them, that if they didn't stop trying to steal the ball from me that I was just going to have to leave and they were going to have to forfeit. They needed me to play, but they weren't respecting me as a player (Wendy).

I have to say some of the guys were my least favorite part. Some of the guys were really hard on me. And some of those relationships really suffered because I couldn't grasp some of the things I “should know.” Two guys got really upset with me because I couldn't do what they wanted me to do – and it was just my inexperience. I mean there was one person particular that I talked to. I said, “Listen, you coming down on my like this is not 153

helpful at all. If you could give me specific explanation – that would be helpful but getting angry with me on the field does not help at all.” After that we were totally cool (Bonnie). Such social and physical interactions were among the routine negotiations that took place on and around the pitch. A bit subtler yet still clear manifestation of power and marginalization can be seen in the way the gendered bodies were organized on the field. Gendered geographies of a coed soccer pitch. On any given SCSA coed pitch – the 66 physical arrangement of bodies can be likened to a version of gendered geography. Among my initial observations of SCSA coed games were the gendered line-ups each team fielded: There are certain positions men play and certain positions women play. Prior to this project, I had not thought a lot about positions being gendered. A review of Henri Lefebvre’s analysis of space coupled with Gillian Rose’s understanding of gendered geography enabled me to ‘see’ the ways in which a typical coed line-up was gendered. My conversations with SCSA women supported the theoretical concepts, reinforcing an embodied praxis. On and through the female soccer- playing bodies marginalization occurred. The gendered bodies on the coed soccer pitch were organized in a manner that relegated women to literally the margins of the field. Sara noted this quite clearly: I've gotten used to playing outside mid. They just put me there because they’re like two points if she scores and she can kind of also like not have as much control on the field as a guy would. And so I play that in every league I play in South City now…It’s easier to control the field in the middle. I played center mid my whole life. I can send the ball through. I was like the distributing queen in high school and now I am like begging for the ball. On nearly every SCSA coed team women play outside positions; center positions are most often played by men. In the league, the majority of the play takes place down the center of the field. Therefore, players on the outside of the field have less touches on the ball , are less involved, have less control, and consequently are marginalized on account of this gendered geography. Sara continued: More recently, last Sunday, I was so mad... we had a new guy on our team playing named

66 I will revisit this concept and elaborate on my observations among other observations in Chapter 6. In this chapter, I aim to focus on the voices and experiences of my participants. 154

Pablo and I was outside mid. And I was open the whole time! Another thing because I am a girl – I don't get marked as well. So you should use that to your advantage. So I wasn’t being marked the whole game and Pablo would not pass the ball to me. He would play the ball through four defenders before he would even notice me. And the guy he was passing the ball to – I was better than him – I'll say it. I was better. So I said to Pablo, “Do you not see me? Do you not hear me? I am wide open”. Such statements embody Lefebvre’s and Rose’s theories on the construction of social space. Rose sees geography as central to social theory. Following Lefebvre, she sees spatial structures as a product and reproduction of social life. In regards to gender, Rose argues that certain spaces are reserved for males while others are reserved for females. In these constructions of gendered geographies, bodies are excluded from particular spaces not by physical structures or force but social mechanisms of control. In SCSA, women are not physically forced to play outside positions – but their continual assignment to such areas reinforces the marginal role they often play on the coed pitch. In addition to playing outside positions, women often play midfield. This was observed and analyzed by Bonnie, “women always play midfield. They run up and down the field supporting everyone – not ever scoring or defending. But run and run and get 67 tired.” And as Molly describes, “there are certain positions they allow us to play,” but there is one position that some women consciously chose not to play: One thing I won't do – because I play goal – I won't play goalkeeper in coed. That's one limit that I do have. Because they shoot harder than women and a lot of guys especially in SCSA won’t jump over the keeper. And I just don't want to put myself in that kind of situation where I am going to get really seriously injured by somebody who is faster and stronger than me (Molly). Cassie, another trained goalkeeper, has transitioned to a field player in most coed matches. I don't know if I am just like nervous about it being kind of a different level of play with guys – harder shots or not wanting to let the team down because you are the last line of defense... an element of that definitely exists. But then too the whole injury... because I definitely was an aggressive keeper, you know. I will go out there and get in it and maybe

67 Since women are often placed on the outside, most teams continue implementing this gendered line-up in order for women to match-up with/guard other women therefore reiterating the gendered space. Further, I contend that women are not placed in outside midfield positions because of their perceived weakness. As a former coach and player, I would place my weakest players at forward/striker position. 155

there is more of a possibility of injury. Cassie’s reflection reinforces the way in which the sport space is gendered – socially and physically. While “harder shots” and the risk of injury are more of a physical deterrent, she also mentions “not wanting to let the team down” (Cassie). A fear of disappointing teammates consistently surfaced throughout the conversations with my female participants. When sharing such reflections, none of the women seemed to struggle with the fact that they were almost driven by this fear. It almost seemed natural, as if the feelings of inferiority on the pitch were embedded in their identities.

Identities

Inferior performances. Among the various aspects of sporting femininities I absorbed through conversations with my 12 participants, I gathered what I interpreted to be an almost instinctual element of inferiority. None of my participants directly stated “I feel as if I am ‘less than’ a male player” – but through their soccer stories and anecdotes, a subconscious notion of inferiority was exposed. These inferior identities are a part of a gender performance. To say that sporting bodies are a gender performance is to take up Judith Butler’s (1990) analysis of gender as it relates to identity. She understands gender as “performatively constituted by the very ‘expressions’ that are said to be its results” (p. 25). A gender performance is a discursive loop that creates a socially constructed idea of what it looks like and means to be feminine, masculine, woman, or man. Within the SCSA’s coed league, to be feminine/woman can look like an anxious, nerve-wrecking performance. I remember my first game because I played with Mark and like the very first pass I got. It was hot as hell and it was on the field where the turf field in now – but there was no turf there. Mark passed me the ball and I missed the ball and I was like, “Oh my god, I am going to be a total failure” (Renee).

I was really nervous. I didn’t know what to expect. I was having stomach cramps. It was really nerve racking (Diana).

If they are going to pass it, it’s probably going to be a dude before it’s a girl…There are even times that I get irritated that they don't want to pass the ball but at the same time I

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don't want it. Just in general, a lot of sports guys are just like – girls aren’t strong enough or too girly. I mean I know the place that would be good to get the ball but I am just not that confident with my ability to settle the ball and get it there (Cassie). My participants cited specific manifestations of their inferior gender performances: negative self-talk, stomach cramps, sweaty palms, vomiting before and even during games. In their descriptions of what seemed to be painful, negative experiences – without missing a beat they added comments such as: “But at the same time…I really liked it” (Renee); “I loved it... It was a great experience because I like a challenge” (Diana); “For the most part I think they've been good games and experiences” (Cassie). Sharing negative self-talk such as “I am going to be a total failure” (Renee) followed by, “but at the same time…I really liked it” (Renee) illustrates a form of hegemony. That is, these women seemed to consent to their second-class status on the soccer field and then simultaneously reflect upon it with gratitude. When specifically asked whether or not their gender was ever at the forefront of their soccer playing experience, they often responded that their gender did not play a major role; they thought of themselves as soccer players. Although within that same conversation, they shared emotional anecdotes, stories, and reflections that revealed versions of inequality among males and females in SCSA’s coed league which they did not like. It seemed that sometimes consciously but more often subconsciously, they saw their role on the field as “Other.” Soccer players. Subtle feminists. In 2012, identifying as a feminist is not a norm on the 68 fields of South City’s Soccer Association coed soccer complex. That said, I did not directly ask any of my participants, “Are you a feminist?” or “Do you consider yourself a feminist?” I chose not to ask those questions because: (1) Identifying which of my participants consider themselves feminists and which do not was not central to my project; (2) Those questions did not ‘fit’ into the natural conversational tone of our exchange; (3) I aimed for the interviews (and focus groups) to be a time of guided stories and reflections as opposed to a question and answer session. Still, if asked, I do not believe the majority of them would consider themselves 69 feminists. Though, throughout their responses, evidence of feminism was brought forward. The

68 While this is not evident in 2012, I do think, if asked, the women I talked with regarding SCSA in the 1980s (see Chapter 4) would have identified as feminists (at least during that time). 69 My interpretation of my participants’ identification of being a feminist (or not) is not to be confused with an argument for or against the third wave of feminism or post-feminism. It is intended to layout the complexity of identities as they relate to 157 word “feminist” was not used at any point in my conversations, but descriptions such as: I don’t really picture myself as a woman – you know what I mean…A lot of people ask me that – how do you like being a female lawyer in a male-dominated profession? And I was like I really don't think about myself as a gender. Not that I am like asexual or whatever – I just don't look at myself... I really don't think that makes me different than everyone else that plays. Not on the field or anywhere really (Renee).

Renee was a founding member of her high school’s first girls’ soccer team in the early 1990s. More recently she lobbied to play in a different league as an adult female in her mid- thirties. I wanted to play in a men's over 30 (soccer) league and Linda, the director of the league, told me that I “couldn't because it was too rough and the men would resent it” – now tell me that’s not sexist. I was like “really, Linda?” She said – “no you need to play in over 40.” And I said, “but I am not 40 yet,” and she said “it’s a much calmer league, they are crazy in the over 30 super six league.” That was pretty bad (Renee). When I asked Molly about her experience as a woman in SCSA, she explained: I don’t think about it differently. A lot of it is how the men perceive the women. That will determine the enjoyment of the game. That has to do with your own teammates and the team you're playing against because if someone doesn't play you – people adjust their game based on who they are playing (Molly). Shortly after, Molly stated, “I don’t think about it differently,” but then pointed out that she refuses to play goal keeper in coed games and when playing on the field, she adjusts her own game against men: I give myself more space against the guys because one touch and they are past me. If I give them more space I can read what they are doing. Men on my team will yell, “Go in, go in! Step to the ball!” and I am like, “Let me do it my way!” (Molly) Molly’s comments support Susan Fauldi’s argument about the contemporary state of feminism; according to Faludi (1997), “all women are born feminists, but most get it knocked out of them” (as cited in Whalen & Nudd, 2006, p. 257). This trend has been described as “I am not a feminist, but…” phenomenon: Women (and men alike) will acknowledge they support equality, females, women, males, men, the marginalized, and most importantly a desire to disrupt widely accepted social systems. 158 equal rights and treatment of men and women, but do not consider themselves “feminists.” bell hooks (1997) suggests a more profitable way to offer feminism is to say “I advocate feminism” rather than “I am a feminist” (as cited in Whalen & Nudd, 2006, p. 259). Again while none of my participants stated “I am a feminist” or “I advocate feminism,” they did provide powerful anecdotal experiences describing how they negotiated inequality. If I am open and also another guy, and even if I am the better option, they'll pass it to a guy. It’s not something that I get upset about a lot, because I've played with guys for so long. I am just like whatever. Or I'll just shut them down every time they come to me (Wendy). Throughout their soccer experiences some questioned widely accepted social systems currently in place. For example, Diana urged a separate league director to create a coed 6 v 6 league (SCSA only offers 11 v 11 coed soccer throughout the year). The league director continually refused saying he would never do that because women would get hurt. According to Diana, he was very adamant about that and then about 4-5 years ago, the league director added a 6 v 6 coed league. Additionally, Belinda pointed out how men’s soccer and women’s soccer are different games – physically, socially, and politically. Therefore, to assume a coed league satiates the soccer appetite of all women is problematic: I enjoyed the women's league tremendously. There is just something about playing with your own gender…when you have the same expectations from each other. There really is a difference between men and women – their attitudes, the ways they approach the game…I think we are missing a major population part of the South City community by not having more women here and not being able to offer them their own league if they come. Some women do not want to play with men. They feel beat up, they just don't like it. And we don't offer anything for those people. And I feel like we are missing something by not offering something for them (Belinda). Belinda places great importance on offering women something that meets their needs physically and socially. While that seems to be a challenging goal to tackle, one strategy could begin by better understanding constraints for women, such as family and domestic responsibilities. Negotiating these duties and incorporating two to three hours of soccer into their schedules was challenging for most. My participants, both those with and those without children, suggested that women’s commitments were most likely a common obstacle to playing. 159

Practices

Gendered time/schedules. Negotiating busy schedules full of responsibilities was a daily practice reiterated throughout my interviews. Most of the first hand experiences with negotiating one’s responsibilities and soccer commitment were shared by my participants who had children. Colleen relayed how she and her husband alternated seasons of play so that each took a turn playing soccer and then caring for their children. Betsy hired a babysitter to come with her and her husband to the fields and watch their son while they played. Belinda described how her children grew up on the sidelines of SCSA games; her teammates and other SCSA members all interacted with and watched out for all of their fellow players’ children. Among my participants without children, most also alluded to their struggle to set aside time for soccer (the duration of games and commute to the field; other evening social obligations; and domestic duties were among the barriers to playing soccer). In addition, they hypothesized that women are not playing on account of having and raising children; I argue that having and raising children is not the true obstacle to soccer participation. Instead, the unequal distribution of labor among genders causes women’s leisure time to diminish. Even those who successfully negotiated their parental responsibilities wrestled with expectations and traditional feminine domestic ideals: I have to go to the grocery, cook dinner, then, and only then, can I play soccer (Bonnie).

People get busy. I think it happens to both men and women, but more for the women. I think women always get stuck with the brunt of it. That’s my personal opinion (Diana).

In a way, women must ‘do their chores’ before they can go out to play; they are subtly (and sometimes willingly) subordinated by domestic duties. Neglecting their ‘chores’ is not a favorable option and even less favorable when their ‘chores’ involve children. As Betsy and Renee stated: Arranging childcare. Because god forbid Mike send an email to our babysitter and find out when she's coming back for the summer. That’s me. Because I have a vagina, I am especially equipped for that. Why does it fall to the women?

I think especially – I would say – when women have kids – their schedule gets a lot worse. You're going to need a real supportive spouse to who's going to let you knock off 160

four hours on a Sunday. These comments align with Shona Thompson’s project on the division of labor as it relates to sport. In her book, Mother’s Taxi: Sport and Women’s Labor (1999), Thompson uses women’s narrative to demonstrate how they negotiate sport and family. A common theme throughout the narratives is the 'second class' position their own sport pursuits take to their husbands' and children. More often than not, women make sacrifices to enable their husbands to pursue their sporting interests. Meanwhile their own sporting pursuits become marginalized with respect to their domestic responsibilities and their families’ “needs.” This notion came to light during my conversation with Rose, who explained that she didn’t play in a league anymore because she is now a wife with a young daughter. After a short reflection on that explanation, however, she added: “Well, my husband plays in a basketball league and a softball league. I guess I could play in a soccer league if I asked him.” She and her husband were serious athletes throughout childhood, college, and now as adults have a desire to stay active. Rose’s husband has continued to be involved in sports leagues, but almost without notice, Rose’s sport participation days have ceased. Rose seemed genuinely unaware that her sporting pursuits had become secondary to her husband’s until she stopped to think about it. For those who negotiated the busyness of life and carved out time for soccer, their experience on the coed pitch involved another set of negotiations. In navigating the gendered space their practices revolved around proving and improving their soccer skills. Proving, proving, and improving. Upon entering a coed sport space, my participants spoke of the need to “prove” themselves to their male counterparts. An unspoken cultural practice exists where the women must prove their capability to earn respect from their male 70 teammates. My participants did not embrace the idea whole-heartedly but just accepted the barrier as a cultural requirement rooted in sport’s perception as a masculine domain. Their inclusion in the space contested sports ideological terrain as it relates to gender. Therefore among their navigation techniques, proving themselves was an initial priority. On this point, Sara was clear: I feel like I am harder on myself because I don't want to look stupid in front of these guys. Because I am a female – I am already weak in their eyes. So if I do something that

70 Ironically, this practice existed even though many of the women had more organized soccer experience than some of the men. 161

makes me look more weak…And like pickups – I’ll go out there and do awesome and all of the guys will be impressed. It’s like night and day. I’ll feel so defeated because I messed up and then I'll be on a high because all of the guys think I am really good. But I don't want that anymore. I want it to go away. I want to play my best and not think about it.

Thorpe (2009) discusses how females negotiate their gender in the male-defined symbolic structure of sport. With a focus on snowboarding (a male dominated sport) she points out how females solidify their snowboarder identity by demonstrating physical prowess. The extent to which they display skill and talent and the longer they remain in a certain group or field of boarders, the less their gender is seen as a hindrance. Therefore like my soccer participants, upon entering a new field gender negotiation is often performed through physical cultural practices. For my participants demonstrating physical prowess and skill were among the acceptance rituals on a team. But performing well once was not enough. Females must continually prove their skill to each game and even each play to gain full acceptance and secure their worth: Each game they had to earn their teammates’ trust to be able to be incorporated into plays without hesitation. Wendy explained it this way: I like playing with guys but you always feel like you have to prove yourself. I remember playing pick-up games and the guys not passing to me. And I am very vocal, so I would just tell them when they don’t. I remember this one kid who would never pass to me and one day he was on the other team. So every time he came at me with the ball, I stole it from him, or shut him down, or he couldn’t get passed me. At the end of the game, he came up to me and was like, “I could not do anything to you,” and after that, when he was actually on my team he started passing the ball to me. Alongside such “proving” performances, my participants also emphasized a desire to improve their soccer skills. As 25, 30, and 35 year-old women some with children and husbands and full-time jobs, they expressed a strong desire to become better soccer players. Among the tactics they used to accomplish this goal, playing with men was a common course of action: I like that there is the coed option because I feel like it helps me as a player to improve. When I play with guys, I play fast, more aggressively (Sara). 162

It was a way for you to get more experience, get used to a fast game because you are playing with men, work on your skills more and get to know the men better in the association. So, it was very fun and it was exciting. It was faster paced (Belinda).

One thing to get us better was to play with or against the men's team, in high school and college. Men’s soccer is faster and it really helped my game when we competed against them. For the next generation, if they want to improve their game, one of the first things I will tell them is to go play with the boys (Rose). In a way, it could be said that these women acknowledge (or at least internalize) that when it comes to skill, pace, and physicality on the soccer pitch they are second-class in relation to men. But they believe that by playing with men they can get better and ultimately pave an avenue for women to transcend their second-class status. They recognize that an imbalance exists and they desire to achieve a more equal soccer status. However, there are organizational policies and practices in place that are rooted in the second-class soccer status of women within the male preserve.

Gendered Governance

South City Soccer Association is governed by a board of directors. Members of the board are also members/players in SCSA’s leagues – either coed or men’s or both. The board is comprised of seven individuals – five males and two females. At bi-monthly meetings, the board discusses and makes decisions regarding operational issues related to finances, policies, discipline, and scheduling. In this section, I am going to focus on my third research question: In what ways does the operation of the league (governance, by laws, rules, and communication systems) of SCSA enable and contest female participation? In this discussion I am going to focuses on three specific operational systems of the league that my participants saw as problematic. With a socio-cultural feminist approach, I will discuss the following policies and organizational issues: SCSA’s token coed soccer space; the organization’s mission statement/identity on ‘paper’ and on the field; and the practice of calculating “girl goals.” I will begin by discussing a manifestation of gendered space, referred to as “token coed.”

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Real fun, real soccer…real coed? SCSA’s tagline is “Real Fun, Real Soccer.” In this section I consider, is SCSA Real Coed Soccer? According to SCSA’s 11 v 11 Coed Rules and Guidelines: Unless specified by the referee and participating captains, teams must field at least two women during the game, or equal to the lowest common denomination of women for a team, less one for substitution. Example: Team A has 3 women, Team B has 4 women. Both teams would field a minimum of 2 women unless otherwise agreed upon by the captains and referees (SCSA, para. 10). Most often, a coed line-up is comprised of two women and nine men; therefore the entire pitch includes 18 men and four women. Less than one third of the players on the field are women; this imbalance cultivates what my participants referred to as “token coed” as opposed to true coed and ultimately just not real soccer. Both Sara and Shelly addressed this dimension: They don't take it us serious when there are two women are on the field (Sara).

I think it would be interesting if there were more women on the field – true coed. In Jonestown (an annual soccer tournament), it’s neat. The women – they have to involve them and they make a difference. Whereas sometimes in SCSA, you know – it’s all about how good your top four guys are and that’s all that matters (Shelly).

The two-women minimum has not always been the policy. In the 1980s SCSA’s coed league required a minimum of four women on the field per team. If there were not at least four women there to play, the game would be cancelled. Currently, team captains often negotiate line- ups if one team is short. Another thing I have noticed about SCSA is that they seem to be relaxing the rule a little bit about how many girls are on the field. And I think it might be an actual reaction to the fact that there are not as many women playing SCSA (Betsy). While the league guidelines suggest that a team with only one female play with 10 players, the opposing captain often does not demand that his opponent play down a player. Some consider this good sportsmanship and friendly play. I argue that it discourages captains from recruiting and retaining female players. If there is no repercussion for having less than two women in a team line-up during a coed match – then why would men (and women alike) make 164 the effort and commitment to include/involve more women. The weak implementation and enforcement of this policy leads to a league culture of gender imbalance – socially and physically. Organizational identity: Competitive or fun? Can it be both? Approximately 200 of the men and women that comprise the SCSA membership play in the coed league (about another 100 male members play only in the men’s league). Among the 200 members playing in the coed league, there are different ideas about what SCSA is and/or should be: It was just a constant conversation about how competitive we were letting SCSA be or not be…. some want it to be more competitive and there are some people that want it to be more recreational (Betsy). According to SCSA’s home page: The South City Soccer Association (SCSA) is an adult (18+) soccer league which offers activities for both men and women. South City Soccer Association has been providing soccer in a fun and friendly atmosphere for over 20 years (SCSA, 2012). More formally, the organization’s bylaws state: The purpose of the South City Soccer Association, hereinafter referred to as SCSA, is to provide a means for members and other approved organizations to participate in organized soccer in a social atmosphere. The philosophy of the SCSA is one of camaraderie and friendly, controlled competition. The competitive aspects of the game are secondary in importance to the recreational benefits to the members and to player safety. Some member’s experiences mirror these mission statements, such as Renee: My favorite part beside from soccer is that we make it social. It’s like a hybrid between competitive and being social. Some people may be more competitive than others. But I love that. Others, like Sara, prefer more of an emphasis on competitive play in the coed league: The coed league is non-competitive, but the men (in the all men’s league) get to play for a trophy. That makes me mad. I feel like we need to be treated as equals. It’s not like a fun league, it’s a competitive league – we all play to win – just like the men do. It’s just like we get shafted, we don't get a trophy. Some see the downfall of competition is player aggression; harsh words are exchanged between 165 players on opposing teams, players on the same team, and players to referees. Betsy explains: People had a real problem with like bitching out referees. So first of all let’s have a reality check – its SCSA – realize that this is soccer, this is the level of soccer that we are doing here. Everybody needs to take it back a notch and just be cool. It is the social bodies within the league, playing on the field, and demonstrating vectors of cultures that construct the sport space and form its identity/identities. Interpreting the social space and its identities produces different meanings to different people. And while SCSA’s official statements (purpose/philosophy) are set to define the organization’s identity, the members may not play/perform in accordance with the purpose/philosophy – which may cause the organization’s physical and social identity to shift. That is, the physical and cultural iteration of SCSA’s identity will overshadow words posted on its home page or within its pdf’d bylaws. This fluid identity is not out of the ordinary for an organization; but its board members should be aware of the dichotomy between what is written and what actually takes place on the field.

The girl goal policy.

Rule #9 71 Goals scored by females are worth 2 points (SCSA, 2009, p.1).

In nearly every discussion with my participants who had experience in SCSA’s coed league, the topic of girl goal policy came up. I did not directly ask about this policy, nevertheless within some responses, opinions about the policy were shared. I also don't like how SCSA does the two points for females. Because that is just another way to make us seem weaker as players – even though we are sometimes just as good as the guys. All of that combined – it’s just a double standard (Sara).

That's another thing I don't like about SCSA – I don't like that girl goals are worth two (Molly). My participants perceived this rule to be an insult to female players. They recognized the

71 Somewhat ironically, this policy is only stated in the document regarding Crazy 8’s Rules and Guidelines (SCSA’s coed, small-sided winter league). It is not in the official Coed Rules and Guidelines. I asked the president of the board if this policy is in another place (because it is a policy that is practiced on the 11 v 11 fields); he was not aware it was not in the official document and concluded its exclusion was an oversight (which may have occurred during a 2009 update of the rules and guidelines). The exclusion of the policy was not intentional. 166 hegemony in the rule; that is, the rule may have likely been put in place with good intentions (to encourage men to pass to women, to involve women more in play, to make women feel ‘special’) but possibly unintentionally it signifies women in the as “Other” and ultimately second class soccer citizens: It’s says that we are not good enough to score a goal on our own therefore it should count more (Belinda).

I would change to two point rule. Because I think that in itself is demeaning to females (Shelly).

I think everybody should be one. It doesn't need to be two, one is fine. It’s almost degrading in a way. It’s like – pass to a girl and their girl will be worth two. No that's not cool (Renee).

It’s saying... it’s so unlikely that you are going to score a goal that it is worth two. And should it count as two if there you're shooting against a girl goalkeeper? But does that give a team with a girl goalkeeper an unfair advantage? (Betsy)

Opinions on the girl goal policy were by far the most common topic addressed without specific prompting; and the position of the comments overlapped more than any other issue discussed throughout the interviews. Other than setting a minimum number of women in a line- up on a coed field, the girl goal policy is the only directly ‘gendered policy.’ Without direct prompting, six of my participants brought it up and shared similar views on the gendered policy.

Moving Forward

Repealing the girl goal policy seems to be a logical place to begin a democratic reform of SCSA and its gendered nature. It is a concrete demonstration of the inequality that exists and the perception of such policies. There is support for the change: ten of my twelve participants mentioned their distaste for the rule, among the ten are past and present board members (i.e. policy makers) with access and influence in the policy making/changing process. In chapter 7 I will elaborate on this policy recommendation and other suggestions for SCSA to consider in an

167 effort to make the coed league a more inclusive space. These recommendations will be based on the stories of my participants shared in this chapter. They will also be based upon my experience as a participant-observer, my field notes, and self-reflexive notes. The following chapter combines those sources of empirical evidence in a critical autoethnography surrounding the negotiation of my gender, power, and participation in soccer, SCSA, and the research process. Chapter 6 builds on the foundation laid regarding women’s soccer experiences in Chapters 4 and 5. Thus far I have relayed the voices of 16 women living in South City. Their stories, anecdotes, descriptions, and reflections helped me better understand: What social and cultural factors contribute to the participation and non-participation of adult females in soccer; how adult female soccer players negotiate their gender in a coed soccer space; and the ways the operation of the league (governance, by laws, rules, communication systems) of SCSA enable and contest female participation. My participants’ responses shed light on the physical and social world surrounding soccer, and specifically coed soccer. Explanations about – why they play (or don’t play); their experiences playing soccer (both past and present); and certain operations of the league impact their participation as women – enabled subtle (and sometimes not so subtle) forms of oppression to surface. The explanations also enable the women’s passion, love, and commitment to a social structure such as soccer to surface. In and through the spaces, identities, and practices that comprise coed soccer, my participations negotiated their gender, power, and participation. Those negotiations often took a certain amount of effort, time, or will. I contend that this is because soccer was not just something that they did – but it was a part of their personal definition. My participants had a relationship with soccer and that relationship had a history. To play soccer as an adult means to open up that relationship – the good and the bad parts of it. Be it social spaces or political pitches, mentoring males or mean girls – each aspect of that relationship has formed and continually (re)forms identity. In the next chapter, I add my own soccer experiences to the 16 voices presented in the previous two chapters. I share my soccer her-story, my involvement in SCSA, my experience as a co-participant and researcher, and finally my participation in all-female 11 a side soccer. Each aspect of my soccer story is in discourse with each part of the project: My topic selection, literature review, research questions, focus groups, interviews, and observations are all a product of my relationship with soccer. In an effort to supplement my interactions with my co- participants, I hope the next chapter feels deeper, more intimate, and produces a more complex 168 understanding of gender, power, and participation in adult coed soccer.

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CHAPTER 6

NEGOTIATING (MY) GENDER, POWER, AND PARTICIPATION

Introduction

This chapter is a reflexive account of my own gender, power, and participation in soccer with a focus on my involvement in South City Soccer Association. Through my ethnographic engagement in the gendered coed sport space, I attempt to make sense of the spaces, identities, and practices that inform my worldview and consequently my research. Throughout this chapter two conversations take place; one occurs within and through the autoethnographic vignettes which include my observations and interpretations of the social world as well as my self- reflexive notes. The other conversation takes place within the chapter’s footnotes; this dialogue is theoretically grounded and attempts to explain my observations, interpretations, and self- reflexivity through established theory. The ideas and themes that I share are informed by previous scholarship in the academic fields of feminism, gender studies, qualitative inquiry, physical cultural studies, sociology, and sport management. Therefore, I use the footnotes in the chapter to theoretically support the discursive surfaces presented in my autoethnographic vignettes. This chapter aids in responding to my project’s first two research questions:  What social and cultural factors contribute to the participation and non-participation of adult females in soccer?  How do adult female soccer players negotiate their gender in a coed soccer space?

Through a critical autoethnography, I intend to address these questions and shed light on the social world displayed on and through my body. I will discuss my social self as researcher, feminist, soccer player, daughter, sister, and friend. Through theoretically informed vignettes, I 72 will demonstrate those identities as praxis. The majority of this chapter is written in first person; I chose this voice not to be narcissistic, a usual critique of autoethnography (see Tolich,

72 Throughout the chapter I represent myself as researcher, feminist, soccer player, daughter, sister, and friend – each identity as it relates to soccer. Following Aitchison (2007), I acknowledge that these individual identities and identity relations inform and are informed by sport. “The dialectic relationship, in which identities are constantly shaped and reshaped, made and remade, presented and represented, engages with sport as a dynamic social and cultural force” (Aitchison, 2007, p. 1).

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2010), but to acknowledge my own epistemologies, axiologies, and ontologies. Following Ellis and Bochner (2000), I argue that exploring the researcher as subject is a productive project for the researcher and her audience. This chapter is informed by autoethnographic works such as Newman (2011), Laurendeau (2012), and Ellis (2011), and Giardina (2012). It “seeks to unravel my researcher subjectivity (and biography)” (Giardina, 2012, n.p.) and its presence and interaction within my project and among my participants. I draw on my field notes, self-reflexive notes, interviews, and ethnographic observations both physically and virtually to demonstrate the important project of researcher as subject. In this chapter, I present three autoethnographic vignettes demonstrating my gender, power, and participation as a soccer player, researcher, feminist, and friend. The first vignette pieces together a myriad of soccer experiences as a player in South City Soccer Association’s adult coed league. Next, I turn my focus to the negotiation of my social self as participant/researcher/friend alongside my co-participants (whose stories are expounded upon in the previous chapter). Finally, I share my self-reflexive experience playing soccer physically with my collaborators/participants. Each vignette aims to shed light on the intersections of the physical, social, and even virtual with in a feminist physical cultural studies project. Hall (1980) explained cultural practices as “the active process—which is at the same time the process through which men make their history” (p. 62). He goes on to conceptualize practices as human praxis, that is, activity through which theory is displayed. Through the following vignettes and theoretical footnotes, I seek to convey the embodiment of a feminist soccer playing praxis. I will begin with my own soccer history, following Carrington (2009) who argues that the dialectic relationship is not just limited to real time actions and language, but it is formed by way of historical forces. Drawing on Hall’s (1996) notion of identity, Carrington (2009) suggests that historical forces and social formations make identity possible; identity is not a finished product, rather, it is an ongoing production formed through history and culture. Vectors of power – in the form of race, gender, social class, religion, and ability – intersect constructing my own history as well as my identity. In conjunction with one another my history and identity inform my present subjectivity. Following Denzin (1989), "Interpretive research begins and ends with the biography and self of the researcher" (p. 12). Therefore, to best understand how I see the social sporting world, I begin with an autoethnographic vignette focused on my story. It describes my present day soccer experiences as a player in South City Soccer Association’s adult coed league. Drawn 171 mostly from my field notes and self-reflexive notes, it pieces together snapshots of what it’s like to be a female in an adult coed league. The vignette focuses on verbal and physical interactions on the pitch. It is often through verbal practices and language where one can point to concrete examples of gender performativity, difference, inequality, and subtle oppression.

Discursive Practices, Contested Corporealities, Sporting Externalities:

Soccer Player, Feminist, Researcher

I’m tough, I’m ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, okay. - Madonna Ciccone

The reward is not so great without the struggle. - Wilma Rudolph Discursive Practices

While lacing up my basic black brand name cleats and donning a pair of shin-guards that I’d been wearing since the ninth grade, I overhear an exchange between some of the men on my team. They are admiring a fellow male teammate’s latest purchase – purple cleats with neon yellow laces. The men complimenting their teammate’s flashy footwear displayed equally as ‘loud’ cleats – one wore teal blue with a large orange swoosh, one Kelly green, and another neon pink. The men are talking about shoes – or rather as they refer to them, their “boots.” I silently laugh to myself thinking – they clearly have a shoe fetish. However, I am pretty sure that they would not characterize their love affair with eye-catching cleats as a “shoe fetish” or even admit that they are soccer shoe shopaholics. But, each time one of the men walks up in his new set of kicks his teammates covet the pricey pair. The cleats are just one piece of the full ‘kit.’ The term “kit” means uniform and is used more often in Association football played outside of the United States. Incorporating such soccer lingo in their lexicon subtly aligns the men with an elite level play. In our coed adult recreational soccer league, our ‘kits’ have become quite the fashion show. The organization’s guidelines suggest the home team wear white t-shirts and the away team wear blue t-shirts. Few teams adhere to the simple, cost efficient selection. In our team’s three-year existence we have donned six different styles of jerseys – each personalized with our last name and number. The latest uniform displays black and white vertical stripes. We were encouraged (by the male team member who funded the new set) to wear black shorts and either black or

172 white socks, in order to appropriately model his contribution. It is clear that some of the men of my team dream about brightly colored cleats and designing their own soccer kit. Like me, most of the women in the league wear basic black brand name cleats and have not led a charge for buying a new set of neon pink jerseys adorned with large black stars (another current kit in the 73 league). In fancy kits or plain white tees, on a professional pitch or coed field, bodies collide and 74 fouls occur. Players are tripped, pushed, and knocked down numerous times in a game. When this occurs and a male body meets the earth, typically he will roll around on the ground clutching his ankle or knee. Whether or not the whistle blows calling a foul, he initiates a dramatic scene. Within a minute or two he stands up, limps a bit, and then is back to playing full speed. In contrast, when I as well as other female players get kicked, tripped, or fall – we most often 75 bounce back up as quickly as possible. For me, falling and staying down is a sign of weakness. I do not need to give the men on the field ammo for their subordinating perceptions of a female body on the coed pitch. I recognize that men may foul other men harder than they foul women; 76 therefore we are more likely able to get up unscathed. But I have had broken toes and even

73 Such scenes support Sally Cole Mooney’s (2006) analysis that compares boys’ soccer to girls’ soccer. She argues that girls soccer represents a “dunning down of male flamboyance” (p. 233). To support this argument, she compares the dress, style of play, and hair of female soccer players to those of their male counterparts. Mooney notes the way in which male soccer players reject norms wearing ponytails, hair bands, and, dreadlocks. While female players are marked by their lack of adornment with hair pulled into ponytails, in plain elastics, no makeup – only sunscreen and chapstick. 74 Mooney (2006) also points out the way in which each gender’s style of play differs; according to Mooney, in matches between men and boys, shirt-pulling and repetitive fouling is commonplace. While she does not critique male players’ reactions to fouls, I have observed different styles of play post-fouls between the men in women in SCSA’s coed league. 75 This feeling supports Holly Thorpe’s (2009) empirical piece surrounding the ways in which female snowboarders negotiate their gender in the male-defined symbolic structure of snowboarding p. (p. 495). According to Thorpe’s participants, as they participate alongside their male peers, female borders may traverse the gendered space by, “riding fast and keeping up with the boys (p. 498). To solidify their female snowboarder identity, they demonstrate physical prowess. My demonstration of physical prowess comes in the form of not getting hurt (or at least not acting like I am hurt). Like Thorpe’s female snowboarders, I recognize that in this sport space, my gender is a hindrance; my gender is not something I intend to change, but I can determine the way in which I react physically in the gendered space. Rolling around on the ground clutching my ankle after I’ve been tripped can be (and I assume almost always is) interpreted as a sign of a fragile female. That is, if I look like I am hurt, then others will assume I am fragile, soft, a weak link. Alternatively, if I quickly recover from falling or getting kicked – I am seen as less of a hindrance and maybe one day, considered tough, like my assumedly ‘tough’ male counterparts. 76 This is not the case for all women in SCSA. Particularly some of my participants expressed how they hated when men would go easier on them and apologize to them if hit. The women wanted to be treated like an equal player not a fragile footballer. This desire to be on the same playing field aligns with Mean and Kassing’s (2008) exploration of the problematic nature of female identities in “'I Would Just Like to be Known as an Athlete:' Managing Hegemony, Femininity, and Heterosexuality in Female Sport.” Throughout interviews with 20 female athletes, the hegemonic structure of sport was revealed. As described in one player’s words: But we still, they still want to prove their point. They still want it to be normal for men to play and different for women to play. When it stops being different and novel then we will have gotten somewhere. You know so it’s still evolving (p. 173 short black outs and in the moment all I could think about doing was getting up and continuing to play. Staying on the ground is not an option if I want to maintain a certain level of respect on the field. Often times, after I collide with a male body exceptionally hard or take a ball to the face the man on the other side of the action quickly apologizes and asks if I am ok. Quickly and curtly, I respond, “Yes, I’m fine” in my deepest voice. This is because, if I were a male, I would not get such an apology. A part of me resents this special treatment, but a larger part of me appreciates it. Maybe I am sucker for chivalry, or am grateful that the male acknowledges our difference in size and strength. I don’t blame men for apologizing because, even on the field, playing a contact sport, intentionally hitting a girl is frowned upon. Their quick apology suggests however direct the hit was, it was supposedly not intentional, and therefore he escapes the dirty player label by which not even the dirtiest players themselves wish to be known. Among females on the field, a slightly different apologetic tone hearkens. It was probably during my first or second match as a participant-observer that I found myself saying “I’m sorry” dozens of times throughout the game. Whether it was a bad pass, missed shot, failed run, or unmarked player, I immediately called out “I’m sorry.” Now these actions were my fault, but the game is full of plays that don’t go exactly right and when I thought about my apologetic tone, it seemed absurd that my involvement in plays ended more often than not with “I’m sorry.” And it wasn’t just me. After observing my own sorry self, I heard many women constantly apologizing 77 to their teammates for failing to ‘succeed.’ Men on the field did apologize for bad plays, but at a profoundly lesser rate than their female counterparts. Disappointed in my own self for quite literally apologizing for my existence and therefore reiterating the hegemonic subordination of the female body on a coed pitch, I attempted to stop saying “I’m sorry” when I missed a kick, pass, shot, or got beat. This was extremely difficult in the beginning as I was conditioned to use a 78 mix of manners and self-deprecation in physical competitions. Ten months after these first

134). This sentiment was echoed by some of my participants, but for me, I am ok with the men on the opposing team going easier on me than on my male teammates. I am an adult recreational soccer player that has no desire to get injured during a leisure pursuit. Twenty years ago, I may have felt differently, but today the stakes (school, work, money, mobility, health) seem much higher. 77 The repetitive and even unconscious use of “I’m sorry” when playing soccer supports Young’s (1980) analysis of a woman’s/girl’s movements. According to Young, a woman’s/girl’s movements are often hesitant performances; this is demonstrated by a small gait, quiet footsteps, sitting cross-legged, language full of qualifiers, or as I argue – sporting apologies. 78 This is a reflection of the socialization of the female athlete. Throughout history, aggression and competition were reserved for 174 observations, I still have to consciously opt not to say “I’m sorry.” It is like a knee jerk reaction, embedded in my performance and takes an immense amount of effort to not perform this iteration of femininity.

Contested Corporealities

Contesting the masculine domain and performing a version of footballing femininity that is not aligned with traditional ideologies of femininity occurs both consciously (like my forced muted apologies) and unconsciously. In an attempt to “make the familiar strange” (Coffey, 1999) during my participant observations, on a few occasions, I arrived prior to my own game to watch an earlier set of adult coed matches. Sitting under the shade of a live oak near the sidelines, I overhear two spectators (they looked to be in their 60s and possibly the parents of one of the adult players) commentating on the performance of the green team’s goalie. The female keeper, Betsy, had just gone one-on-one with the opposing teams forward and blocked his shot. With the ball securely in her hand, she commands “Green – we got to mark-up on throw-ins! Why the fuck not?” As she punts the ball away from her goal, the male spectator adjacent to me remarks “She scares me when she yells” The female adds, “When she yells, I jump.” A younger male (likely in his 30s and possibly the couple’s son) responds, “That’s the goalie’s job.” I think about chiming in saying, “that’s right, if a goalie isn’t vocal, she is not doing her job” or question, “would you jump or be scared if the keeper were a man? Or do you just expect that from a male keeper?” Instead of verbally challenging their comments, I resolve to be more like Betsy on the 79 field – vocal, loud, commanding. The following week, I arrived for the earlier matches again; this time I made myself 80 available to any team that needed players. I picked up with the purple team, which was short men/boys. As recent as the 1950s and 1960s, when women’s teams from different schools would meet to play, the organizers would mix squads with players from each school in order to discourage aggression and competition. This practice suggests instead of anger and aggression – polite play is preferred. I contend that my apologetic, polite performances stem from a history non-competitive female athlete conditioning. 79 Cultural constructions of gender – what and how a woman “should” act – are often contrary to sport ideologies. Bodies that are aggressive, muscular, competitive (traditionally masculine descriptors) are athletic bodies; female bodies performing traditionally male ideologies pose a social struggle for the athlete and/or her audience (Hargreaves, 2000). I personally wrestle with such a performance – knowing an athlete is aggressive, muscular, competitive; wanting to embody those descriptors; but then also already being conditioned to embody socially accepted performances of femininity. Further, performances like Betsy’s and the comments made by her audience exemplify Judith Butler’s (1990) notion that “gender is a performance with clearly punitive consequences” (p. 522). That is, when a woman’s performative acts are not aligned with traditional gender roles, there are repercussions at some level. 80 Coffey (1999) warns researchers not to make the field too familiar and to always view people, relationships, organizations, and 175 one player. Conscious of the fact that I was doing the purple team a favor (they would have had to play down one player if it weren’t for my participation) my confidence was boosted. The team needed me; my body on the field mattered. The majority of the match, I felt as if I contributed to the game. I did not make any huge errors (and if I made small ones, the words “I’m sorry” did not leak from my lips). Toward the end of the game I was dribbling down the left side of the field uncontested when from behind came a male body donning a purple jersey that proceeded to take the ball from me and continue dribbling down the field. I stopped in my tracks – Did my own teammate just steal the ball from me? Stunned and even embarrassed I looked up and caught the gaze of a female on the opposing team who had witnessed the play. She shook her head almost laughing and said, “It’s because you have a vagina.” We both laughed, and while I felt a bit consoled, I opted to not stay for the final period and instead join my team warming up for the next set of games. I did not deserve to be treated like that. I was helping them out. I hadn’t blown it, I was actually playing well. I was mad – so I retreated. I did not confront the purple player. In hindsight, I am not sure if that would have been productive. If I did confront him, would I get a 81 reputation as a ‘bitch’? So what if I do? Why do I care about being called a ‘bitch?’ I was fueled by other performances, such as Betsy’s – a demanding, commanding keeper. I don’t think of her as a bitch. After 25 years of playing soccer, am I really still trying to figure out what kind of player I am? Why do I struggle with this? And why do I put up with it?

Sporting Externalities

I put up with it, because there are few better feelings than hearing your name shouted by a teammate across the field after a flawless two-touch cross: “That’s away, Katie!” Little compares to the gut reaction of genuinely jumping literally for joy when a teammate scores, tying the game. Becoming so familiar with your teammates’ plays that a mutual understanding exists that’s never talked about, just communicated via thumbs up and high fives. Acquiring endearing nicknames from teammates that normally only close friends or family use – “Kate’s ball” or “Flanagan’s wide.” Being so completely out of breath after a play that it is clear

situations, from different perspectives. This notion is especially pertinent to my project because, my field, the coed soccer league, is a space with which I am very familiar. I have played soccer for over 25 years and have participated in this league for the past three years. Therefore, I attempt to make the familiar strange by playing on different teams when possible and watching matches as opposed to always playing in them. 81 Here, I fear what Butler refers to as punitive consequences when one’s gender performance is not aligned with the traditional gender ideologies. 176 at no point you thought about the level you were exerting yourself – you just did it, because that’s what you do on the field, on a team. Or standing in three-man wall in front of the goal – consciously acknowledging that cutting off the angles of the set shot outweighs the knock of a ball drilled to the stomach. Watching teammates improve, gain confidence, and succeed on the field. Chatting with the young children on the sidelines who are watching their dad (and sometimes mom) play soccer as a 30, 40, and 50 year-old. Sharing a cold beer in the parking lot after the game, rehashing goals, set pieces, and bad calls. Calling my dad after a game and letting him know – we won. These are among the instances that make it all worth it; that make me continue playing week after week. Coed soccer is imperfect as with most sports and aspects of the social world. Acknowledging these imperfections, inequalities then negotiating the physical, social, cultural, and political terrain intentionally and in partnership with others – not only makes it ‘worth it’ but lays the foundation for sport as a mechanism for social change.

The Physical and the Virtual: Researcher, Friend

When I worked with girls in high schools, I advised them to learn to argue well and not be afraid of confrontations, not be afraid to disagree. If some guy or teacher is not treating you well, you have a right to speak up! But you have to speak up in a way that is powerful. Write it down, practice, rehearse your lines if you need to, but say something! - Loung Ung

At Facebook, we build tools to help people connect with the people they want and share what they want, and by doing this we are extending people's capacity to build and maintain relationships. - Mark Zuckerberg

It is 5:00 a.m. on a Thursday morning. I am sitting in my locked car parked beneath a street light in front of CVS scrolling through emails that came in overnight. A text pops up. Wendy is running a few minutes late. “Oh good,” I think, “I can finish my last few sips of coffee before we start.” She arrives a couple minutes later, bleary-eyed in a cutoff t-shirt, shorts, and hair pulled up into a ponytail secured with an elastic headband. We both loop a single car key through our laces and start slowly jogging down the sidewalk. In the first few minutes we decide how long we are going go. “What time do you have to be at work?” I ask. 177

“Not until eight,” Wendy says, “but my legs are pretty tired from soccer last night so I may only be up for 4.” “Pick-up last night?” “Yeah, Dan wants us to practice before our first 6-on-6 game next week.” “Cool,” I say. A couple weeks prior to this Wendy and I re-connected as a part of my project on Women’s Soccer. We were originally introduced at church, we were in the same bible study, and I knew she played soccer. Our bible study ended and we just didn’t stay in touch. When I was going through my mental Rolodex, trying to think of the female soccer players I knew, Wendy came to mind. I wondered if she was still in town…a couple clicks later we became Facebook friends and I messaged her, explained my project and asked if she’d be interested in participating. A week later we met at a Starbucks near her place. We spent the first ten minutes or so catching up – exchanging polite questions… How’s school? Work? Any guys in the picture? When we had exhausted the niceties I segued into my research spiel. Wendy was my fourth interview and her soccer story had similarities to others but of course, her own unique take. She currently played weekly pickups with a group of friends, mostly guys and a couple of girls. The group planned to register for a 6 v 6 coed league in the fall. Wendy talked about how she really liked playing with the guys. “I’ve always played with guys and like playing with guys,” she said. “I feel like I get beat up every week. Every week, I come home with a major bruise or my ankle swollen up... I love it.” After about an hour, I switched off my recorder and we chatted a bit more about life. “Are you still running?” she asked. “Yup,” I said. “Early mornings?” “I do…If you ever want to join, just let me know.” 82 A week later there we were… getting in four miles before our to-do lists took over.

82 Running at 5:00 a.m. is one way Wendy and I negotiate the demands of our day. While Wendy and I do not have children, we do juggle professional, academic, and domestic duties daily. Inserting leisure time in between sunrise and sunset is not a reliable or even realistic option. But running at 5:00 a.m. on a weekday morning assures that no one or nothing else will demand our attention, therefore it is acceptable to set aside and hour of leisure time before the sun rises. This iteration of negotiation exemplifies Shona Thompson’s (1999) analysis of the marginalization of women’s leisure and sporting pursuits. While Wendy 178

I like running with people because I like talking – it keeps my mind off the whole exercise part of running. But our first few runs did not have as much talking as I’d prefer. I asked her as many questions as I could – how’s school, how’s work, how’s your family – and then there would be long stretches of silence when my feet began to feel heavy, my form sloppy, and my breathing quick. The whole physical part of running is not something I enjoy thinking about. It was probably our fourth or fifth run that was sans silent stretches. We started our slow trot and almost immediately Wendy took over the conversation. “We had our first 6 v. 6 game on Monday.” “How’d it go?” I asked. “It was a disaster!” Wendy went on to share or rather vent about the game. Prior to the game, they had been practicing, multiple times per week preparing. The practices and scrimmages had gone well. But they had gotten creamed their first game, collectively embarrassed. The team captain was pretty upset post-game. When Wendy suggested another practice, suddenly the captain (who had insisted on the multiple pre-season practices) was busy every night of the week and couldn’t practice at all. “He was totally pouting,” said Wendy. “I mean I hate losing too – but let’s do something about it. I had some ideas about strategy and when I started to share them he shut me down.” She later added, “Did I mention Dan has never played in an organized soccer league – he has never been coached. I’m no soccer guru – but I have been playing soccer for over a decade.” As she was venting…I listened intently, and kept thinking, “Yeah– I know. That’s why I am doing this.” At the end of our physically and emotionally taxing run, I thanked Wendy for sharing all of that and then asked if it would be okay if I used some of that for my project? She quickly answered, “Yes! Please do!” The following week Wendy emailed me: “Dan and I exchanged some heated words via text yesterday after the game,” she wrote. “I am going to type it up and send it to you.” I was a little surprised; she was going to go through the effort of typing up a text conversation? Wow – she is really getting into this. That evening she attached the Word document to a

and I are not necessarily putting others’ leisure pursuits ahead of our own (one aspect of Thompson’s argument), we opt to relegate running to margin of the day in order to secure the hour of leisure time. 179

Facebook message. I read through it and just felt defeated. I could feel how frustrated she was. She was trying to get Dan to understand that she was a soccer player, and shouldn’t be treated differently because of her gender – but Dan was clear: on the soccer field, female players were second 83 class. He was adamant. And so was she. But what now… I closed the Microsoft Word doc and logged off of Facebook… I don’t know how to respond…Do I tell her to quit, leaving the team to forfeit the rest of their games as “punishment” for the captain’s sexist soccer strategies? Do I Facebook stalk him and post pointed feminist rhetoric on his wall? Or do I attempt to remain passive? Just listen, nod then quietly write about it. Further, what if Wendy shares a story or opinion that may enhance my project, but ultimately hinder our new friendship? Or worse – what if I disappoint her? What if I don’t do what she 84 wants or expects with the stories she shares? Negotiating this researcher/friend role is becoming challenging/messy, but also a lot more 85 “real” than our one hour semi-structured interview. Negotiating this line without crossing it has become a regular consideration for me – on runs, via Facebook, text, email. See, it is because of 86 my gender, power, and participation that Wendy trusts me; that I am even able to be co-present. But is it ok to take advantage of that? After first contacting Wendy – I continued through my mental rolodex – another woman came to mind. I didn’t know her well but knew exactly where to find her. One friend request and

83 Dan’s attitude resembles initial perceptions among Eric Anderson’s (2008) participants within his project, “‘I Used to Think Women Were Weak:’ Orthodox Masculinity, Gender Segregation, and Sport.” Prior to ever having female teammates, the men admitted to perceiving women as weak, fragile, and un-athletic. It was not until they had women as teammates that their perception changed. While I do not know if Dan had any experience playing with women, but I do know he expressed his thoughts following his first couple of coed soccer games. Whether or not Dan’s perception would change after a sustained period of time playing with women, I do not know. But I think it is important to note that Dan’s attitude is not rare and can be attributed to inexperience with coed sport. 84 As I stated in Chapter 3 of this dissertation, I follow a feminist communitarian model, which prioritizes partnership, advocacy, and an attempt at social change. This is a grave task, that when put forth as an intention, is a social responsibility not just an aspiration (Denzin, 2001; Fierre, 2006). 85 Such self-reflexive questions and role negotiation was challenged following William Foote Whyte’s Street Corner Society. Whyte’s response to critics included reflective explanations about his genuine relationships he formed with his participants. While this occurred 50 years ago and is still a topic of debate (Richardson, 1997), there is not a finite resolution to such a fluid, subjective social process. 86 As a participant-researcher, I have aimed to achieve an embodied co-presence in my project and with my participants. By this, I mean, as Giardina and Newman (2011) put forth, “we study social bodies and the physical cultures often situated (by self or other) at the intersecting vectors of power, knowledge, and identity, mingling about those subject positionalities upon which power is either challenged or reaffirmed (in both real and imaginary ways) – through bodily performance and praxis (p. 2).” 180 a few messages later we set up an interview for the following weekend. We met at Starbucks on a rainy Sunday afternoon – I sat in the back of the dim coffee shop away from the blending and frothing. As I was mentally rehearsing my prompts, Sara walked in. Immediately, I was taken aback by how different she looked. I'd only seen her in extra-large soccer jerseys with her hair fixed taught in a bun. This afternoon despite the frizz- producing weather, her hair rested neatly on her shoulders – with a flat-ironed finish. She wore a casual black dress and gladiator sandals. I greeted her lined eyes and curled lashes with a smile but her own glossed lips remained pressed. Sara and I had actually played on the same team for one season. But I am ashamed to admit, I never really befriended her. I usually do befriend new females on my team – I feel like that is my duty in the hypermasculine space, to welcome them warmly, connect with them, and 87 encourage them on and off the field. But Sara had a cold look...she was five foot two about 120 pounds and just completely intimidated me. She had an unapproachable Brooklyn-meets-Miami air about her that I just never went out of my way to break through. We sat down at the two- person table removed from the bustling café – I slid my “informed consent” document across the table…to me, this is the most unnatural and awkward part of the interview… she signed without hesitation, then I flipped on my recorder and hoped that she’d forget that small machine was listening. Sara's responses to my warm-up questions were curt. Crap – these are the easy ones, the ones that are supposed to open her up. Questions three, four, five…I got one to two sentences tops. I guess this is going to be a short one...which means a short transcription...there’s one upside to rigid interaction. My last question was always the same…it had been ingrained in my ‘Q&A note pad’ after interning three years at a local public radio station. My news producer trained me to finish every interview with: “Is there anything else you'd like to add?” According to him, the open-ended question often led to the best sound-bites. He was right then, and now; the simple question delivered a powerful monologue. The perfectly groomed, hard little Brooklyn/Miamite offered a ten-minute soliloquy

87 Befriending and encouraging fellow female footballers stems from my agenda that begins with a feminist standpoint epistemology and political agenda which “(a) focuses on the condition of women in society, and (b) is grounded in the assumption that women generally experience subordination” (Macionis & Gerber, 2010, p. 35). 181 sharing her demeaning experiences in the coed league. She did like playing with guys, it helped her improve and challenged her skills – but more often than not, she played games fuming on account of the blatant dismissal of her female body on the soccer field. She ended the rant fired- up, saying, “We need to get women's games going. We need to start a Facebook group and start organizing women’s soccer in this town.” I thought to myself, “Wait – that’s not what was supposed to happen – at least not yet. I haven’t finished my interviews or analyzed anything.” As my internal control freak went into overdrive, I nodded and smiled. “Just let it go…” the good angel said, “let’s just see what happens.” We finished our interview at about 3:00 p.m. on a Sunday. Around 3:30 p.m., I sat down at my computer to transcribe the now lengthy recorded audio. I had a Facebook request from Sara to join the group, “South City Women’s Soccer.” She did it. By morning there were 40 members of the group – which is twice the number of women playing in SCSA’s coed league. She’s doing it…I guess we’re doing it. Two weeks later 20 women showed up to scrimmage a local high school club team. We sure are doing it….There’s 11 a side all-women’s rec soccer taking place in South City for the first time in over a decade. Since then we’ve had three other scrimmages. More than 80 women are in the Facebook group – Sara and I have decided to alternate coordinating a scrimmage each 88 month… she did it…we did it…we all did it. But here again – is there a line…as researcher/advocate – acquaintance/friend? Like Wendy – Sara has gone out of her way to email me ‘stories’ of her frustrations in the masculine domain of coed soccer. She shares this with me because she knows I care…but do I care as a 89 friend or researcher or both? Is it ok to be both? Wendy and Sara trust me – because I am like

88 The creation of the women-only space, physically and virtually occurred in a similar vein that the women’s flat roller derby has evolved as described by Michele Donnelly (2011). Through participant observation, Donnelly witnesses the democratic existence of a gender regime via women’s roller derby. While the women-only spaces are not natural but instead formed intentionally, the democratic, grass roots character of the organizations contribute women’s empowerment. 89 Here, I wrestle with my ethical obligations as a researcher and a human being. Positivist and post-positivist work, seems to separate the researcher and the human being. And while I can understand the rationales behind value free, removed academic research, I cannot bring myself to separate the two. This infusion of a moral dialogue throughout inquiry follows Cannella and Lincoln’s (2011) call for a level of ethics that is grounded in nurturance and compassion. For me, an important element of the moral dialogue is that it is not automatically adopted from the work of seasoned scholars but it is born out of a self-reflexive ethics; it is something I needed to explore and conclude on my own. 182 them. We are all white, middle class females – able bodied, educated, heterosexual – would they 90 trust me if wasn’t marked by all or even any one of those cultural forces? We like to do the same things (play soccer, run); we feel comfortable in the same places (Starbucks, Facebook, etc.), we all communicate effortlessly (typing, texting, ‘liking’); and we don’t chat on the phone or even interact beyond morning runs, soccer matches, and cyberspace. The space where I connected most deeply with my participants was not on the coed pitch during my participant observations or across a table as I offered scripted interview questions. I learned more about these women off the field and within virtual spaces. I share these two stories to illustrate the simultaneously intentional and unintentional relationships that were formed through this project. I intended to be a co-participant in this project – to gain trust and after gathering all of my empirical evidence to analyze it and to do something. In that pursuit, I entered spaces – physically, socially, virtually that enabled me to accomplish my research intentions but through the academic inquiry and advocacy, my embodied co-presence challenged my social self. Before I was halfway through the project took on a mind of its own. And I had two new friends – women who were now a regular part of my life. There certainly are gray areas here…they are my participants – turned friends – and now regular informants. I try not to focus on the whole research/researcher thing – but if they message, text, or email something that enhances my project I ask permission if I can use it. So far, their responses have been a resounding ‘yes’ – but what happens if/when that changes? Will our friendship change? Will we become acquaintances again? Will we lose touch? Will we stop 91 coordinating scrimmages, will women’s-only soccer in south city cease? As a non-neutral researcher doing feminist physical cultural studies, negotiating my gender power and participation physically, culturally, and socially is challenging terrain. As we move forward and call for more general studies of action, embodied co-presence, partnerships,

90 To do Feminist Physical Cultural Studies, I agree with Michelle Fine’s declaration regarding feminist research that one “must chronically and uncomfortably engage in ethical decisions about how deeply to work with/for/despite those cast as Others” (Fine, 1994, p. 15). Further, one must continually question, “do we (feminist researchers/activists) merely reproduce power by playing to power?” (Fine, 1994, p. 15). 91 Again, here – I am continuing a moral dialogue and seeking to place the community prior to the individual (me/my informants); this is consistent with a feminist communitarian model (Denzin, 2009). I acknowledge my work in this space is and will affect(ing) others. Keeping myself accountable to my community needs to be a constant consideration. I respond to this call by considering what I say and do on the sidelines of the all-women’s scrimmages and by consciously choosing what I post on our Facebook page and/or say to my informants that fosters an inclusive and democratic space. 183 and advocacy, we need to be vigilantly aware that in these spaces of physicality we are interacting with bodies that are social or rather social bodies. And taking on such an agenda may be deepened when approached through embodied co-presence and reflexive negotiation of gender, power, and participation. Further, the spaces in which we gain the most knowledge of the social world may be separate from the intended ‘field’ and should attempt to be inclusive for all social bodies.

Safe Spaces and Inclusive Practices: Soccer Player, Researcher

It is amazing what can be accomplished when nobody cares about who gets the credit. - Robert Yates

Sports do not build character. They reveal it. - John Wooden

We had planned to start at 6:00 p.m. on a Tuesday evening in late summer. But after the Franklin High football coaches confirmed that they would be simultaneously occupying all three 110 x 40 yard practices fields on the high school campus, about 30 of us caravanned to the city 92 park down the street. The high school girls’ coaches were a bit frustrated, but acknowledged reality – girls’ soccer is second class come August and pre-season football two-a-days. Upon arriving at the city park, each team collectively carried a goal to an agreed field length, and arranged neon orange cones defining field width; by about 6:30 p.m. (30 minutes later than planned) we began to play. I was in charge of organizing this scrimmage and could feel the gaze (and hear annoyed comments) from some of the woman on my team about starting late. I shared their annoyance; it was a week before school began and many of the women were teachers prepping elementary classrooms, moms purchasing children’s school supplies, and/or graduate students finalizing their own autumn academic routines. Time was precious and

92 Following Vertinsky and Bale (2004), at the core, sport contests are struggles over space. Often in sport the spatial rules – be it architecture of the landscape (training facilities, practice grounds, arenas, stadiums) or rules of the games are created by men. And “those who command space can always control the politics of place, even though it takes control of some place to command space in the first place” (Harvey, 1989, p.35). On this particular occasion at Franklin High, the school’s practice fields were controlled by the football team. While the girls’ soccer team is excluded from this space, it is not surprising. This is because as Hargreaves (1986a) contends, There has been a long history of excluding women from traditional male sports since their formative years in the nineteenth century women have been excluded even from such sports as snooker and darts which require very little muscular power, but have been traditional male leisure preserves, leaving women to their 'separate spheres' of the home and the family. (p. 112). Therefore excluding women (i.e. the Franklin High girls’ soccer team) from the school’s practice fields is not shocking, but rather a historically produced cultural practice. 184 spending large amounts it on their own sporting pursuits instead of preparing dinner or organizing the upcoming months’ morning transportation options was difficult to rationalize. Further, a delayed kick-off diminished their gross playing time – a rare and cherished 93 opportunity for most. About 18 women showed up to play the local high school girls’ team. A few of the men in South City Soccer Association coach the Franklin High girls’ team. When Sara and I decided to arrange monthly scrimmages for the women in the “South City Women’s Soccer” Facebook group, I reached out to the Franklin soccer coaches. They jumped at the opportunity to get together 11 v 11 game for their girls’ squad and we (the women of South City) were equally as excited to play soccer against opponents our own size. With seven subs, I was a bit anxious about everyone getting a sufficient amount of playing time. We had no coach, no one assigned positions, and our rotation of subs was unsystematic. I offered to sit first and suggested the seven subs rotate in at the ten-minute mark, 94 call off the positions we preferred and/or ask who needed a rest. After a catching up with the Franklin High coach, I glanced at my watch and ten had minutes passed. I looked to the women on the sideline and said, “At the next dead ball let’s take the field.” I planned on going in at left midfield, this is the position I had played for the past three years on my coed team. Thanks to the encouragement and drilling of my dad, I had a decent left foot and while I did not have the speed preferred for an outside-mid, I was deemed not worthy of center mid or stopper (the two positions I played for over decade of my soccer career) by my coed captain. As I waived the left half off, our center mid shouted, “Hey – anyone want to play in the middle? I prefer the outside.” I hesitated a moment to see if anyone took her up on it – and when no one did, I graciously accepted. I jogged to the middle of field smiling, I was playing center mid for the first time in over ten years. As I jogged to position, I felt as if an announcer had just called out my name and position over the loud speaker, declaring the substitution. I was confident, though anxious. It

93 The women’s gravitation toward domestic responsibilities exemplifies and builds upon Hargreaves’ (1986a) notion that the exclusion of women from sport propels them to “their ‘separate sphere’ of the home and the family” (p. 112). In this situation the women of South City have successfully negotiated a space to play soccer, though they are still restrained (willingly or unwillingly) by the demands of their separate spheres. 94 A gender imbalance such as this may be offset by what Donnelly (2011) describes as women’s constant fight to win space. That is, in order for women to control a sport space, they must make a continuous and concerted effort. For Donnelly, this manifested in a women’s only flat truck roller derby league. For the women of SCSA, it manifested in a grassroots and virtual effort that resulted in female only soccer scrimmages. 185 took me awhile to adjust to the position. In the center, you get the ball a lot more and a lot more is expected of you. But like riding a bike – distributing the ball, giving/going, calling for overlaps – all came back naturally. Further, in this space, I was not a conscious objector to headers. While I was about 10 or 12 years my opponents’ senior – I had the size advantage, so challenging a high school girl to a header was not equivalent to a bodily sacrifice (like it is on a coed pitch). I played in the middle for most of the scrimmage, but also rotated to outside mid. This position often takes throw-ins and for most of my soccer career (even when playing in the middle) I was my team’s designated thrower. But in coed games, playing outside mid, I am the designated ball fetcher. When the ball goes out, I am usually the closest to it, so automatically I go after it and pick it up. More often than not, when I turn back to the field, one of my male teammates is standing at the sideline waiting for me to toss it to him so that he can take the throw. Now I recognize he can likely throw it farther than me. And on some plays (i.e. near the opposing team’s goal) that is the best play, but that is not always the case. Short, smart, direct 95 throws are often a better choice than chucking the sphere as far as possible. In the all-female scrimmage as left mid I fetched the ball when it went out of bounds, but unlike playing left mid in coed games, when I turned back to the sideline, no one was there to take the ball from me. I took every throw-in available to me, each time tweaking my form with an exaggerated dragging toe and strong follow-through. The scrimmage went on for about 90 minutes, as time progressed some women on our team left on account of other commitments until our initial 18 players dwindled to eleven. With no subs, each of the remaining women was able to play as long as we wanted in whatever position we desired. This is not typically the case in coed games. There is minimum requirement of two women on the field and on most teams the minimum is not regularly exceeded unless necessary (i.e. there are only 11 players available to play and three of them are women). That is, women typically substitute for women, women typically guard other women, and more often than not, if there are three women available to play on a team, the three

95 My indirect prohibition of throw-ins is demeaning. Each time, I run after the ball and toss to a male player, I am publicly (though not willingly) deferring to a male. This exclusive force is not a dominating source of power, but instead a version of control that occurs with my consent. I have never said to the male player waiting for the ball, “No, I got the throw.” Such short interactions support Hargreaves (1986a) argument that a female’s experience in sport is not neutral; instead, her relationship with sport is characterized by power systems, ordered systems, and division. Further, such traditional sporting models reinforce traditional gender roles by supporting ideas about the sexual division of labor – at work and at home – as the 'natural' state of affairs. While it may seem extreme, as I defer to a male for a thrown-in, this reinforces other gendered deferrals, in other social spheres. 186 rotate each period, each sitting an equivalent amount of time, while most of the males play in 96 requested positions for the maximum amount of time the captain allows. So here we were, playing for over an hour and a half on a Tuesday evening. Our opponents had plenty of subs, and were rotating their youthful legs regularly. The sun was beginning to set, high school girls’ parents began to arrive but we continued to play. The Franklin High coach had called ‘next goal wins’ two goals ago. We had ignored two signals to cease because we were having a blast, the high school girls loved the challenge, and for the women it would likely be at least another four weeks until we would get to play like this again. I was still playing center mid, but after two hours of offensive and defensive play, I was getting slower, and my legs less spry. When I caught myself walking back to defend (an act universally discouraged in soccer and most sports) I looked to the empty sidelines for a sub, and was reminded that there was no one to relieve me. My body did not want to continue to play, it was time to call it quits – I started this and I could bring it to an end. Our goalie caught the ball and I called out – “hold it, times up.” Both teams knew we were playing on borrowed time, so we shook one another’s hands politely saying ‘good game.’ I approached the Franklin High coach with my hand extended and said, “Thank you. Really and truly – this was special for us. This was the first time most of these women have played 11 aside all-female soccer in more than ten years. Thank you for making that possible.” He returned the thank you and promised to schedule another scrimmage in the future. I turned back to the South City women and thanked them for coming out, and for being patient with the late start. “I hope you’ll come out again next month, we’ll let you know when and where the next scrimmage is via Facebook.” As I drove home, sweaty and exhausted, despite my aching hamstrings – I was physically satiated. I smiled, simultaneously reflecting and reminiscing. Reflecting on what just happened, when I began this project, I would not have fathomed this outcome. Reminiscing about soccer – girls/women’s soccer – it has done so much for me, physically, socially, and spiritually. The girls/women on the field this evening would likely concur. Whether consciously or unconsciously we are aware of the highs and lows both all-female and coed sport produce – it is

96 It took me a few seasons to problematize this ordering of bodies. Initially (and subconsciously) I assumed, that while gendered, this was a natural rotation. Even after questioning the gendered practice, as times, I may rationalize that it is a choice to guard other women and/or rotate in and out for only women ((Messner & Bozada-Deas, 2009). But my “individual choice” is influenced by the embedded pattern divisions that reinforce societal norms and gender roles. 187

97 infectious. Choosing to play as a girl, and then later as a woman, is movement – a subtle form of activism with the potential for fueling social change. This is true in South City and likely other soccer communities in which girls’/women’s is thriving and an uncontested positive 98 experience. While I do believe that the pros outweigh the cons in both all-women’s and coed soccer, we still need to keep a critical mind and always consider how negotiating gender, power, and participation in sport spaces is a social force that needs to be revisited regularly by players, coaches, parents, sport managers, feminists, and sport scholars. This can come in the form of conversations, blogs, courses (academic and professional training), policies, or a soccer pitch full of soccer playing females ranging in age from 15-40; each of these forms have the potential to turn heads, ignite epiphanies, and foster inclusive practices. Cultivating safe sport spaces physically and socially for all bodies requires wrestling with conflicting spaces, identities, and practices with an ultimate goal of collaboration and inclusion.

Conclusion

This chapter and the self-reflexive vignettes within were written in an attempt to bring to life my feminist physical cultural studies agenda. The foundation of this dissertation stems from my personal experiences as a soccer player, researcher, feminist, and friend. To be silent on the reflexive elements of my relationship and involvement with soccer seems disingenuous. I was not a silent observer nor participant in this project; therefore, I felt it was necessary to share personal interpretations of my gender, power, and participation in soccer. It is my intention for these vignettes to supplement the voices of my co-participants in Chapter 5. Their multiple voices, coupled with SCSA’s first female members (the women within the focus groups of Chapter 4), and my messy reflexive account form a crystalline (Richardson, 2000b) of women’s soccer experiences. The different angles/perspectives of illustrates layers and many iterations of gender, power, and participation in soccer. All of this is in an effort to explore the social and physical world. My inclusion of these three vignettes aligns with my ethical intentions. Throughout each

97 Here again, following Hargreaves (1986a) assertion that a female’s experience in sport is not neutral; instead, her relationship with sport is characterized by power systems, ordered systems, and division. 98 Following Fine (1994) discussion of feminist activist research, I see my project as an example of ways in which researchers can embrace conflict and struggle, then in and through contested spaces, practices, and identities can carve out collaboration and community (Fine, 1994). 188 of these vignettes, I am conscious of my identities (soccer player, researcher, feminist, and friend). Therefore, continually questioning my motives, my biases, my agenda throughout this project is an important piece of my ethics. These vignettes include those ethical and reflexive questions which demonstrate my ethical intentions. Further, these vignettes aim to fulfill my attempt to “show” and not just “tell” (Tracy, 2010). For example, instead of stating (telling) that women are subtly oppressed in SCSA, I can more effectively communicate that point by illustrating (showing) the typical positioning of female players on the outside margins of the field. Most importantly, these vignettes are what I suggest it doing Feminist Physical Cultural Studies may look like: I partnered with my participants, co-conspired, and encouraged. We interacted physically, socially, and emotionally. The boundaries of research and real life are not defined, but instead fluid and even non-existent. The focus groups, interviews, participant observations, and self-reflexive notes are simultaneously research strategies and real life interactions. Incorporating self-reflexivity (Carrington, 2009; Denzin, 1997) enhances this critical ethnography by the way in which it has the ability to unearth silent but powerful systems at work in a space such as coed soccer. As Simmonds writes, “it is impossible to escape the body and its constructions. Therefore, being conscious of myself as a person, an embodied self, is what helps me perceive things that 'others cannot see or feel'” (p. 60). This process is not clearly defined but messy and at times even difficult to put onto paper. Through my self-revelations, I hope others may recognize parts of themselves in my writing, shedding new light on the familiar, with the ultimate intention of bringing material freedom to others (Madison, 2011). That is, I hope others will gain insight on their own physical and social situations, through exposure to the experiences shared in my project.

189

CHAPTER 7

CONCLUSION

Introduction

This project has revealed insights on many levels; among them, comprehensions related to the fields of sport management, sociology, cultural studies, feminist theory, qualitative inquiry, and advocacy. In addition to the theoretical and practical insights, the project has resulted in my personal and professional growth as a researcher, advocate, and friend. Together, the practical and personal insights have produced a Feminist Physical Cultural Studies project that weaves theoretical understanding with practical applications and personal development. In this chapter, I present my conclusions on both practical and personal levels. The practical conclusions include policy recommendations, key theoretical themes, and contributions to the field of qualitative inquiry. In addition, and in an effort to continue my inclusion in the research process and my project’s autoethnographic elements, I present personal lessons learned in my “research” life. First, I begin with a brief summary of the impetuses for this project. Next, I discuss, what we have learned from this project and what this project does, that is what does it contribute to the field and my research agenda. Finally, I suggest, we were should go from here: What do we research next, how do we research next, and most importantly, what do we do now. To begin, I recall how and why this project was started on both the surface of South City Soccer Association’s coed league and beneath the surface of one female participant in the league experimenting with and exploring Feminist Physical Cultural Studies.

In the Beginning…

Practical: On the Surface

South City Soccer Association’s coed league was experiencing a gradual decline in the number of women coming out to play. This was becoming an increasing burden for team captains, the league commissioner, board members, and male and female players alike. It was stressful for all involved and often resulted in imbalanced matches and less than ideal soccer. The coed league was waning and while most were aware of this, no one was directly attempting to address it. 190

The coed league had existed for over 30 years. Through casual conversation with women who played in the league 30 years ago – I came to know that there were plenty of women involved in both SCSA’s coed and all-women’s league in the 1980s and 1990s. This was puzzling because according to statistics and pop culture, female participation in soccer was popular and had grown exponentially over the past 30 years (Acosta & Carpenter, 2012). More females were playing or had played soccer in 2012 than they had in 1982. So where were they all? Or rather, what was keeping them from coming out to play in SCSA’s coed league?

Personal: My Motives

The pure connecting factor is that those of us who describe ourselves as feminists want equal rights for all people. - Betty Buckley

I had a few of my own hypotheses about what was keeping women from coming out to play in SCSA’s coed league. As I shared in Chapter 1, during one match, a certain referee’s blatant sexist comment sparked a fire inside my feminist self. At that point many involved in SCSA were perplexed regarding the decline in the number of women; but it was clear to me that episodes such as a referee’s demeaning words about women were among the reasons fewer women were on the coed pitch. It was not a mystery to me, but it was to others, and I wanted to share not just my opinion but to be able to present evidence that helped better inform the decline of female participation in the league. I wanted to see what other women thought about it and hear about their experiences in SCSA. A deeper, more personally embedded, motive for this inquiry was kindled over the past 25 years: first within a fledgling female soccer player, then competitive middle and high school player, next a college club team member trying to find her place on a university campus, and now an adult coed recreational soccer player. Soccer was a constant throughout my life; but I was not sure exactly why. Why out of all the things that make-up who I am, why has soccer been a continuous part of that story? Would I say I “love” soccer?… Maybe…sometimes…but not really. So why do I keep playing? Why do other women keep playing? Why have other women stopped? And more specifically, why have other women stopped playing in SCSA’s coed league?

191

Some Answers, More Understanding

Practical: Key Themes

The purpose of this project was not to find a solution to a problem, but instead, better understand the issue at hand via the eyes of the actors involved. Through this project the following research questions were explored as it relates to SCSA.  What social and cultural factors contribute to the participation and non-participation of adult females in soccer?  How do adult female soccer players negotiate their gender in a coed soccer space?  In what ways does the operation of the league (governance, bylaws, rules, communication systems) of SCSA enable and contest female participation? Through the exploration of these questions, common themes arose. In this section, I touch on three themes that I found brought forward the deepest level of new understanding to the plight of adult females’ experience to play or not to play in SCSA’s coed league. These themes arose through long, often emotional conversations with my participants and ten months of participant observation in the coed league. The first key theme is a result of my participants’ histories. Historically produced soccer. It was clear that my participants had a long history with soccer, which resembled a personal and even intimate relationship rather than a lighthearted hobby or pastime. Among my 12 participants I interviewed as a part of Chapter 5, 10 of them began playing soccer at an early age. I asked each of the women, “How did you get involved in soccer?” The responses this question revealed were emotional, at times tumultuous, deeply embedded cornerstones that marked their lives. Within the conversations tears, anger, pride, and love surrounding soccer were expressed. Their soccer experiences/relationships spanning 20-30 years shaped their youth and adulthood. This is in contrast to my focus group participants in Chapter 4. The first women involved in SCSA in the 1980s began playing soccer as adults. Their soccer experiences did not extend back through childhood. For them, it was new; it was not muddled with catty teammates, powerful coaches, injuries, and college dilemmas. For the SCSA women in the 1980s, playing soccer was an experiment; but for women in the 21st century, playing soccer comes along with expectations. Female sport (specifically soccer) opportunities have increased dramatically since the 1970s and the institution of Title IX. Along with those increased opportunities comes a highly influential social structure in the form a sport. In this

192 case, soccer becomes a discursive symbol for girls and women. It represents ideals, identities, sometimes success, celebration and community, but also heartbreak, stress, anxiety, and exclusion. So to play soccer as an adult female means to revisit the highs and lows associated with that social structure. It is not a whimsical decision or carefree way to spend time; it is a deeply rooted relationship, a link to the past, an emotional bond. These complex relationships are one reason females may be apprehensive to play soccer as adults. Subtle oppression. If or when women do choose to play in the adult coed league, oppression exists throughout the imbalanced sportscape. The oppressive practices are not blatant and may even go unnoticed by some. They are subtle forms of oppression that may be just enough to keep them from returning for a second or third season. The male-dominated space often results in less involvement of female players – this can come in the form of receiving the ball less, playing outside positions, and few if any opportunities to take penalty kicks, throw-ins, or corners. Women are not prohibited from these plays but are rarely acknowledged when they arise and subsequently women rarely volunteer (unlike their male counterparts). A more direct form of oppression is the girl goal policy which at first glance crowns women a special/important status on the field; but in practice, it adds pressure and anxiety when approaching the goal with a ball and as my participants stated, is plain demeaning to them. When it came to the rules of the game, specifically the amount their goals were worth, my participants wanted to be treated equally. Unobvious remedies. Many of my participants shared that their least favorite part of playing in the coed league was interacting with some of the men on the field. They feared injuries when playing against larger men but more often than not had little tolerance for men who did not pass the ball and displayed poor sportsmanship. In the same conversations in which they shared these dislikes, most also were adamant that they like playing coed soccer; specifically, playing with men. It is challenging, it helps them improve, and creates a certain enjoyable social atmosphere. While there is no women’s league in South City for my participants to join, creating one did not seem like a conclusive solution. They were open to the idea of a women-only soccer space, but were not open to the idea of a slower or less skilled version of soccer. Further, adding another commitment to their weekly schedule and deduction from their paycheck was not an idea they fervently embraced. Balancing their current responsibilities and pressures is challenging enough. These women live in world of full of ideals that involve high expectations – socially, 193 domestically, physically (athletically), and professionally (for some also spiritually, politically, and intellectually as well). Tending to each of these is not simple. There are not obvious solutions to the layers of woman (and women) in South City. The complexity of their social states reinforces the need to work closely with them and over time as they grow and develop, meeting their needs and desires as women and possibly as soccer players.

Personal: Productive Dialogues

Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one. - C. S. Lewis

The themes I mentioned above were most clearly revealed during my focus groups and interviews. In talking and interacting with my participants I learned about women’s experiences in South City Soccer Association just as I did observing and playing myself. Both strategies informed one another and could not have stood alone. Still, talking and interacting with my participants was my favorite part of the project. Sitting across from a woman, listening to her story, at times sharing a bit of mine, laughing with them, reassuring them, and just getting to know them better was not only productive for this project but incredibly rewarding. As a qualitative researcher, I experienced the value of talking with people when attempting to better understand the social world. Their opinions were not all of the same, nor did I concur with everything they shared, but that did not matter. What mattered was that two women engaged in a deep conversation about sport and life. We connected.

Taking Action

Practical: Women’s Voices

Simply but powerfully, this project opened up a space for women to express their voice. The stories and reflections my participants shared may have never been spoken aloud or even thought about in years. The opportunity to speak about one’s opinions in a safe, non-judgmental, encouraging space is simple, yet powerful. Listening to their ideas and suggestions with the intention of passing along their thoughts to decision makers enabled to women to feel heard. Further, the formation of the South City Women’s Facebook group was a concrete action item that came about as a result of these conversations. Throughout the formation of the group, my

194 interviews continued and many of my participants remarked that they were energized with the new effort in organizing women’s recreational soccer in South City. They were excited for the opportunity and inspired by the effort and interest in such creating such an outlet. I cannot say that this project changed any one woman’s life, but I am confident in saying that it did a little bit – whatever form that takes. It got us a step closer to creating a more inclusive space, enabling more adult females to play soccer, and hopefully inspiring younger females to one day become adult female soccer players.

Personal: Small Contributions

I want you to be concerned about your next door neighbor. Do you know your next door neighbor? - Mother Teresa

As I mentioned above, I recognize this project was conducted on a micro-level and among a class of people that are not desperately in need nor dangerously oppressed. I did not choose to travel to a third world country, build relationships with an indigenous population, or attempt to oust a large corrupt corporation. I stayed in my own neighborhood and sought to problematize an organization with which I am very familiar and have mostly enjoyed being involved with for the past three years. As Norman Denzin encourages his students, “study what’s close to you…Produce understanding not knowledge” (Denison, 2007, p. 335). When selecting this issue, I was unsure of the ‘result’ but confident that I could do something. I had the support of the SCSA Board of Directors and access to key individuals involved. And in the end, more than 80 women have virtually connected on account of their interest in soccer. Over 20 different women have participated in monthly women-only scrimmages. I am inspired when I see a team of women take the field, some with children, partners, day jobs, and a myriad of responsibilities. I hope that our opponents (who thus far have been mostly 10 years younger than us) see adult women playing soccer, remember that image, and imitate our example of sporting women.

Recommendations and Advice

Practical: Policy Recommendations

In this section, I aim to specifically address my third research question:  In what ways does the operation of the league (governance, by laws, rules,

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communication systems) of SCSA enable and contest female participation? Throughout chapters 4, 5, and 6, I discussed specific practices that both impede and encourage women to play in SCSA’s adult coed league. These practices and policies were drawn from my focus groups, interviews, and participant observations. After processing and analyzing mine and my participants’ thoughts, reactions, and suggestions regarding the league’s operation, I have extracted five specific policy recommendations that can potentially foster a more inclusive sport space. Repeal the girl goal policy. This recommendation was most clearly expressed and agreed upon among my participants. This is a concrete step towards gender equality in the coed league. It is not an official soccer rule, but a form of “affirmative action” that has not been successful. The “group” it aimed to assist has expressed opposition to its existence. Repealing the girl goal policy requires a vote by the membership. Putting such a process into action will draw attention to the subject. Male and female members alike will become aware of the idea that opposition exists to the girl goal policy. When brought to their attention SCSA members may agree and some may disagree, but in either case it will encourage critical contemplation, spark conversations, and ultimately challenge dominant ways of thinking. Appoint a board member that focuses on inclusion/membership outreach. Currently the board is comprised of seven volunteer members that are elected by popular vote. They meet bimonthly to discuss certain issues surrounding the league (fees, schedules, discipline, finances) and in between communicate via email if deemed necessary. Each board member is assigned certain roles such as secretary, treasurer, and registrar. In addition to their official roles, various duties or action items are assigned to individuals to complete (updating the organization’s Facebook page, recruiting referees, or planning the annual banquet and awards). I recommend that the board include a position that focuses on inclusion of all “types” of potential members (in respect to gender, race, ethnicity, social class, religion, sexuality, and ability). This can come in the form of an additional member of the board or consultant to the board. It can also just be an added responsibility to one director’s duties. The board is aware of the need for a more diverse membership in the coed league. There have been many conversations among the seven members about diversifying membership. I think an effective next step is to designate an individual to take the lead of this cause. This person can bring recommendations to the board, which could hopefully result in action and progress in ameliorating the homogenous trend. It will important 196 for the “inclusion chair” to not just become a token post or a position that “checks” a certain box. Some accountability or annual review/report should be put into place in order for the position to demonstrate genuine effort in increasing inclusive practices in the league. Encourage more social events within and among teams. Throughout my focus groups and interviews, my participants emphasized that one of the things they liked best about SCSA’s coed league were the social aspects. Currently, the social element of SCSA occurs unintentionally (pre- and post-game interactions and natural connections through sport). Most ‘events’ occur organically (among players on one team; organized by members, or team captains). Unlike the women’s representative, I do not think it would be effective to organize more large scale, membership-wide events by the board. Instead, the team captains should be encouraged to create more opportunities to socially connect with teammates or players on other teams. These ‘events’ would be specific to the teams’ preferences and personalities. It may come in the form of a weekly workout, post-game tailgate gathering or pizza party, birthday celebrations, or team parties. Whatever form the social opportunities take, they would serve as chance for teammates to develop relationships, form bonds, and attach them to people in the league, not just an organization. This may ultimately result in (female) member retention and more importantly human connections. Assist in the facilitation of monthly women’s scrimmages. Currently, the monthly women’s scrimmages have taken place at venues offered by our opponents – high school complexes, club team practice fields, and university intramural fields. When we have attempted to ‘host’ a scrimmage we are confronted with barriers such as the requirement of an insurance liability policy (costing over $250); price to rent a field for two hours (costing approximately $40 and an extra $20 an hour for lighting); unavailability of field time (soccer fields in public parks are occupied by youth leagues for the majority of the year). To no avail, I have spoken with managers of soccer fields in South City, local government parks and recreation employees, and the SCSA Board President about securing a place for the South City Women’s Soccer Facebook Group to host a match. After many conversations, these key individuals understand our request, yet no mechanism exists in South City for an organized group of women to secure a field to play soccer for free. This seems contrary to the role of a public parks system and the existence of public green spaces. Thus far, in researching this issue, I have mostly just asked questions; I have not challenged the rules or demanded a change. But I do think the key organizers of soccer, 197 parks, and soccer fields can find a way to for this to occur. SCSA’s president has recognized the desire such a system to exist. Further conversations among those familiar with the operations of South City about this issue could result in a solution. Pilot a “true” coed league. My final recommendation is the most time consuming. At this point in SCSA most teams field two women and nine men. Some of my participants shared that they felt as if they were the ‘token’ females on the field; they were just there to fill a quota, not to actually make an impact on the field. A few of my participants had played in leagues or tournaments in which line-ups were comprised of five men, five women, and a goalie. They described this as a very positive experience and referred to it as “true coed”; that is, female players were instrumental in matches. I recommend experimenting with a “true” coed league. This may begin as a 6 v 6 or 8 v 8 league; in either case the rules of the league would require an equal ratio of men to women. Contacting other adult recreational leagues in the region and soliciting their advice on such an undertaking could be beneficial. The “pilot” league may initially have fewer teams on account of the small number of women currently involved in SCSA. Still, I think that if successful, eventually word would spread about the positive experience and a true coed league could be sustained in South City.

Practical/Personal: Message Delivery

In the near future, I intend to present these recommendations to the SCSA Board of Directors. The effective presentation of these suggestions to the board may be my greatest challenge related to this project, yet. While I believe my recommendations are attainable, I see my task as genuinely and humbly presenting my findings, communicating them in a non- threatening/non-judgmental way, and providing some level of support in whatever direction the board chooses to proceed. Similar to my approach during focus groups and interviews, I think it is important to address the board as its partner and refer to the implementation of these recommendations as a partnership. My tone of voice, response to questions, and attitude will all contribute to establishing a working relationship. Further, presenting the recommendations in a simple, “easy to implement,” and engaging way may be most effective. Whether it is when communicating with the board, my colleagues, or interested friends and acquaintances, it is important that my delivery be carefully conveyed and with a tone of concern in order for my message to be heard. Further, I think it is important to share with the board the importance of

198 investing in future leaders of the association. As discussed in my focus group chapter, it seemed that there was a gap in cultivating new leaders and keeping their legacy alive. I think this is a point that the board can rally around and energetically implement.

Practical: Researcher, Feminist I chose a project in which I could physically and intimately be involved. This choice was guided by a Physical Cultural Studies agenda in which I believe I explore the social world most effectively and genuinely by physically immersing my body into research. In this project, I ran, sweated, got kicked, tripped, and exchanged high fives. I exchanged texts, Facebook messages, and emails. I laughed, talked, and vented. The product (while not finished) was also physical – relationships were built, leaderships took charge, a community was formed, and games were played. I was able to study the culture physically, wrestle with it intellectually, and do something socially. The feminist lens through which I approached my Physical Cultural Studies project added a layer to the burgeoning PCS movement. I entered the sport space as a member of a marginalized group; I sought out other members within the group, listened to their stories, shared my own, and became a member of a physical and virtual community. Upon entering the field, advocacy and partnership were primary among my intentions. I set an agenda that worked toward equality. As the project evolved, I made an effort to remain partners with my participants. The result was a virtual and physical social movement. Additionally, my attempt to document a version of women’s soccer history in SCSA aids in furthering my feminist agenda. Such histories are threatened on account of the dominant versions of history penned by those in power. Therefore, encouraging women to reminisce about their pasts create another chapter of history that generations can learn from, imitate, and seek empowerment. Collectively, this demonstrates a Feminist version of PCS, one that does more than critique but turns the critique into productive discussions and efforts toward equality. It is a version of PCS that is a powerful praxis; theoretical concepts such as space, practices, and identity are embodied by researcher and participants alike. This creates an intellectual force that’s boundaries extend beyond classrooms, conferences, and academic journals. This force is Feminist Physical Cultural Studies.

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Personal: Soccer Player, Researcher, Friend

Where passion and the needs of the world cross, therein lies your vocation. - Aristotle

Personally, and on a tangible level, I have concluded that there are things that I can do immediately as a female on the soccer pitch to better establish myself as an equal contributor on the field. When the opportunity for a throw-in arises, I can respectfully let my teammates know that “I’ve got it.” I can volunteer for penalty, corner, and free kicks. I can also request to play a position in the center of the field such as center mid or stopper. When playing, I can continue to keep my apologies to a minimum and remind my teammates, there is no need to apologize to me – we all make mistakes on the field, that is why we have each other. As I have previously addressed, throughout this project I have deepened relationships with women in SCSA. This was not a direct intention but instead a result of a using feminist communitarian model. Prior to this project, I perceived a few of my participants to be intimidating on account of their talent, skill, or soccer experience. That perception was quickly amended and now the same women that intimidated me regularly Facebook message me inviting me to social functions, local road races or other events surrounding our similar interests. The formation of these relationships was the most enjoyable and rewarding element of my project. What made it so rewarding is that what this intellectual project produced is very similar to the spiritual project I am exposed to on Sunday mornings. Week in and week out, we are encouraged to build relationships, get to know the people already in our lives. While I did not intend for this spiritual guidance to intersect with the academic direction I have been exposed to, they are very similar. To be able to satisfy both intellectual and spiritual aspirations in one forum is incredibly exciting to me. Further, I look forward to being able to relay these lessons in research and in life to my own students one day. I hope to influence them as my own mentors have influenced me and to spur them to create projects and embark on endeavors that take action and satisfy their passions. Following Bellah (1985) and Bochner (2009), I hope to covey what it looks like to “…think of your work as a calling in the strongest sense of the work…(to) make your work morally inseparable from your life. That might be a good way to end (my) story” (p. 66).

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APPENDIX A

INFORMED CONSENT FORM

FSU Behavioral Consent Form Managing Coed Soccer: Gender, Power, and Participation

You are invited to be in a research study of adult soccer participation. You were selected as a possible participant because you have been involved in soccer in some capacity in you life. We ask that you read this form and ask any questions you may have before agreeing to be in the study.

This study is being conducted by Katie Flanagan in the Sport Management Department at Florida State University.

Background Information:

The purpose of this study is to explore the culture of a coed soccer league and to better understand why females choose to participate or to not participate.

Procedures:

If you agree to be in this study, we would ask you to do the following things: Participate in a 1-2 hour interview (or focus group). It will be recorded and transcribed but no indefinable information will be collected. Pseudonyms will be used.

Risks and benefits of being in the Study:

The study has no risks. But at any time, you may terminate your participation in the study.

The benefits to participation are not direct, but discussing your involvement in coed adult soccer may help benefit the soccer community in general.

Compensation:

You will not receive payment for your participation in this study.

Confidentiality:

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The records of this study will be kept private and confidential to the extent permitted by law. In any sort of report we might publish, we will not include any information that will make it possible to identify a subject. Research records will be stored securely and only researchers will have access to the records. The principal investigator is the only individual that will have access to the recordings and transcriptions. The recordings will be stored in a locked file cabinet for one year and then destroyed. The transcriptions will be stored on a password protected computer for one year and then erased.

Voluntary Nature of the Study:

Participation in this study is voluntary. Your decision whether or not to participate will not affect your current or future relations with the University or Tallahassee Soccer Association. If you decide to participate, you are free to not answer any question or withdraw at any time without affecting those relationships.

Contacts and Questions:

The researcher conducting this study is Katie Flanagan. You may ask any question you have now. If you have a question later, you are encouraged to contact Ms. Flanagan.

If you have any questions or concerns regarding this study and would like to talk to someone other than the researcher(s), you are encouraged to contact the FSU IRB at 2010 Levy Street, Research Building B, Suite 276, Tallahassee, FL 32306-2742, or 850-644-8633, or by email at [email protected].

You will be given a copy of this information to keep for your records.

Statement of Consent:

I have read the above information. I have been given the opportunity to ask questions and have had those questions answered to my satisfaction. I consent to participate in the study.

______Signature Date

______Signature of Investigator Date

FSU Human Subjects Committee Approved on 3/15/2012. Void after 3/14/2013. HSC # 2012.7784

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APPENDIX B

IRB APPROVAL LETTER

Office of the Vice President For Research Human Subjects Committee Tallahassee, Florida 32306-2742 (850) 644-8673 · FAX (850) 644-4392

APPROVAL MEMORANDUM

Date: 3/15/2012

To: Mary Flanagan

Address: Dept.: SPORT MANAGEMENT

From: Thomas L. Jacobson, Chair

Re: Use of Human Subjects in Research Managing Coed Soccer: Gender, Power, and Participation

The application that you submitted to this office in regard to the use of human subjects in the proposal referenced above have been reviewed by the Secretary, the Chair, and one member of the Human Subjects Committee. Your project is determined to be Expedited per per 45 CFR § 46.110(7) and has been approved by an expedited review process.

The Human Subjects Committee has not evaluated your proposal for scientific merit, except to weigh the risk to the human participants and the aspects of the proposal related to potential risk and benefit. This approval does not replace any departmental or other approvals, which may be required.

If you submitted a proposed consent form with your application, the approved stamped consent form is attached to this approval notice. Only the stamped version of the consent form may be used in recruiting research subjects.

If the project has not been completed by 3/14/2013 you must request a renewal of approval for continuation of the project. As a courtesy, a renewal notice will be sent to you prior to your expiration date; however, it is your responsibility as the Principal Investigator to timely request renewal of your approval from the Committee.

You are advised that any change in protocol for this project must be reviewed and approved by the Committee prior to implementation of the proposed change in the protocol. A protocol 203 change/amendment form is required to be submitted for approval by the Committee. In addition, federal regulations require that the Principal Investigator promptly report, in writing any unanticipated problems or adverse events involving risks to research subjects or others.

By copy of this memorandum, the Chair of your department and/or your major professor is reminded that he/she is responsible for being informed concerning research projects involving human subjects in the department, and should review protocols as often as needed to insure that the project is being conducted in compliance with our institution and with DHHS regulations.

This institution has an Assurance on file with the Office for Human Research Protection. The Assurance Number is FWA00000168/IRB number IRB00000446.

Cc: Michael Giardina, Advisor HSC No. 2012.7784

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BIOGRAPHICAL SKETCH

Mary Katherine “Katie” Flanagan grew up in Columbus, Ohio were she played soccer since the age of five. Through elementary and middle school, she was often the only female on her team. This was also true when playing soccer at home with her two brothers. In high school, she was a founding member and eventually captain of the girls' soccer squad. She graduated summa cum laude from Bishop Hartley High School in 2000. While she has an opportunity to play soccer at the Division II Collegiate level, at a small school in Ohio, her desire to experience new things led her to attend Florida State University. At FSU, Katie majored in Mass Media Studies and Sport Management at the undergraduate level. She was the Assistant Sports Editor of the FSView, Florida State's campus newsletter. She also completed internships in television and radio reporting, including sports broadcasting. Katie played for FSU's women's club soccer team as a freshman and sophomore then coached an elementary-age girls recreational soccer team as a junior and senior in college. After graduating summa cum laude in 2004, Katie moved out to Los Angeles, California to work as an Ameri-Corps Volunteer. Her placement was in the public relations and community outreach department of a non- profit hospital in a low socio-economic area in Southeast L.A. It is there where her interest in social justice and marginalized groups turned into a passion. It was also in southern California where she was able pursue outdoor recreational activities. Following her year of service, she returned to Tallahassee to begin a master’s program in Recreation and Leisure Administration at Florida State University. While completing her masters, she first worked as the Communications Director for the Florida State Parks system within the Florida Department of Environmental Protection (DEP). Katie was then appointed as Cabinet Affairs Director for the DEP. During her tenure at DEP she played in an adult recreational coed soccer league. In 2009, she was accepted to FSU's Sport Management Doctoral Program. She began the program as a part-time student while working full-time in state government. Katie eventually transitioned into a full-time doctoral student. As a doctoral student, she has enjoyed teaching undergraduate classes such as Diversity in Sport, Current Issues in Sport, and Cross-Cultural sport. She developed and implemented an online course in Cross-Cultural Sport. Katie's research

229 interests include the socio-cultural aspects of sport including gender, race, and call as well as sport's role in social justice and human rights. She is a member of the North American Society for the Sociology of Sport and the North American Society for Sport Management.

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