An animated series "PILOT"

WRITTEN BY BRANDO CONKLIN THE WORLD, 'UNDER THE STRIP':

(Inspiration concept Art by Paul Lasaine, for Dreamworks animated film 'Flushed Away'; Copyright belongs to owner)

THE CHARACTERS (TIM & EARL):

EXT. HOUSE - ESTABLISHING - NIGHT The sky is BLACK as DARK CLOUDS threaten a suburban home with desert landscaping. OFF-SCREEN: NATIVE AMERICAN FLUTES PLAY. SOOTHING VOICE (V.O.) Life...is suffering. Life...is chaos.

INT. TIM'S BEDROOM - SAME TIM (16) lies on his bed with over-the-ear headphones on. He seems a bit unhinged. Sweaty. Movement under the eye lids. The AUDIO BOOK CONTINUES: SOOTHING VOICE (V.O.) Right now you are teetering on the edge of uncertainty. (beat) It feels like your life is ultimately meaningless; and most days perhaps you wish you had the balls to end it all. (then) That's the demons talking, friend. But, lucky for you, I (and only I) possess the solution! (then) ALL you have to do is-- The tape CHANGES VOICES: AUDIO BOOK If you'd like to hear more, please purchase the full version for-- Tim removes his headphones to the SOUND of his parents ARGUING. Annoyed, he SHOVES a pillow over his face.

INT. LIVING ROOM - DAY Downstairs, Tim's recently-separated parents, JOHN and LORI, stand at odds over the CHAISE LOUNGE portion of a sectional couch, while TWO POLICE OFFICERS stand by. 2.

JOHN (to Lori) You don't get the house AND the chaise lounge, Lori. That's ridiculous! LORI As ridiculous as having a chaise lounge without a house to put it in? (annoyed) Fine. If you want it that bad--take it. John celebrates a silent victory. JOHN (to Police Officers) Would you be so kind as to lend a hand? POLICE OFFICER #1 We're not allowed to get involved. POLICE OFFICER #2 (leans in) UNLESS one of you attacks the other, OR if you surpass your fifteen minute allotment for the collection of the entirety of your life -- including: important documents; family keepsakes; clothes; electronics; vehicles; and all things personally purchased with your own money, that you, in fact, made solely of your own merits. Police Officer #2 smiles. JOHN Did you say--Fifteen minutes from when?! POLICE OFFICER #2 (checks watch) Twelve minutes ago. John becomes frantic as Tim cautiously enters the room.

JOHN TIMOTHY! Come here and grab the other side of this couch. Hurry, boy! John starts trying to lift the chaise section. 3.

TIM (to John and Lori) What's going on? JOHN Your mother kicked me out of MY house, and now she's trying to screw ME out of MY things! TIM (to Lori) I thought he was on a business trip. JOHN Business trip?! HA! THAT'S RICH! (to Tim) No, son. I got fired. (sneaks in) And your mother and I are getting a divorce. TIM Wait--what?! Lori steps forward. LORI Okay--you know what, John? Just take whatever you want now, and I'll deliver the rest once you're out of your office. John doesn't expect that. He looks around... JOHN Tim. I want Tim. LORI Fine. (to the Police Officers) Shut the door on your way out? POLICE OFFICER #2 Ma'am. LORI (to Tim) Here-- Lori throws Tim a ROBE she's been holding, and then leaves the room. 4.

Tim looks at the ROBE: on the left breast is HARPER'S NAME, underneath "TAO NIGHT CLUB". TIM (calls after Lori) Mom? John grabs his shoulders. JOHN Forget her, son! Look at ME! Now do you see what she is! (then) Look: I didn't want it to come to this, but you have to choose! Like Leonardo in Catch Me If You Can-- (off Tim) DON'T LOOK FOR HER! Look at ME! I'm the one who's here! What's it gonna be, son? WHO'S it gonna be? (finally) This is the most important decision of your life! Tim swallows. TIM I- I- I... He looks around for help, but: - POLICE OFFICER #1 is extremely annoyed. - POLICE OFFICER #2 holds up his watch. - And JOHN crosses his arms as he leans into Tim: JOHN Well...? WE'RE WAITING! THE PRESSURE IS TOO MUCH: Tim turns and BOLTS out of the house, SLAMMING the door behind him. Confused, John turns to the POLICE OFFICERS: POLICE OFFICER #1 Happens all the time.

EXT. TIM'S HOME - NIGHT

Tim escapes out into the open air, using HARPER'S ROBE for cover as the LOOMING RAINSTORM finally unleashes its wrath. There's a CRACK OF LIGHTING and an EXPLOSION above. 5.

Tim looks up into the sky: A SINGLE-ENGINE AIRPLANE, tailinhg a BANNER ADVERTISEMENT: "1-800-CUTIE-4-U" descends on a SKYLINE OF NEON in the near- off distance. The LAS VEGAS STRIP.

EXT. VEGAS STRIP - LATER Soaked to the bone, Tim navigates the TRASH-RIDDEN SIDEWALKS of the Strip through thickets of DIRTY HOOKERS; SLEAZY PROMOTERS; SHIT-FACED TOURISTS; and KNOCK-OFF MASCOTS. TIM (muttering to himself) Who do they think they are? Making you choose... (looks at robe) You don't need them. Look at Harper; she's been fine on her own. An ESCALADE LIMO drives by with a BACHELORETTE PARTY hanging out of the SUNROOF. WOO GIRL WOOOOOOO! VEGAS!!! She chucks a FAT TUESDAY CUP at Tim, who DUCKS, causing it ti EXPLODE on the glass window behind him. In the after math of the close call, Tim watches the limo drive away and the girl's "Wooo's" melt back into the cacophony of the strip. When he turns around, Tim comes face-to-face with a CRAZED HOMELESS MAN, dripping neon blue slush. HOMELESS MAN (stern) I invoke the Code of Hammurabi. TIM Um...Okay. Without another word, the HOMELESS MAN grabs the door of the shop in front of them: a SUBWAY SANDWICH franchise.

HOMELESS MAN Hold this. Tim holds the door open and begins to nervously WHISTLE. 6.

INT. SUBWAY - MOMENTS LATER The Homeless Man peers into the glass display: HOMELESS MAN Mmmm...Right. Lemme get a foot-long meatball on-- He scoops an armload of CHIPS from the rack. HOMELESS MAN (cont'd) (shouts to Tim) FALL BACK!!! The Homeless Man tosses Tim some of the stolen chip bags and bursts out of the store, leaving Tim FROZEN as he locks eyes with the PIMPLY "SANDWICH ARTIST" behind the counter... After a brief moment, Tim takes off too. SANDWICH ARTIST I hate my life.

EXT. VEGAS STRIP - CONTINUOUS Tim chases after the Homeless Man. TIM Where are we going?! HOMELESS MAN To freedom, my boy! A DEAFENING CRACK OF LIGHTNING is accompanied by BLARING SIRENS as a POLICE CAR SCREECHES to a stop ahead of Tim. The TWO POLICE OFFICERS from his house hop out, guns drawn. Tim SKIDS to a halt; but the Homeless Man CHARGES FORWARD. HOMELESS MAN (cont'd) NOW I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS!!! He unleashes a WARRIOR CRY and rushes forward. The Police Officers quickly respond with a WARM BLANKET OF LEAD; blowing the Homeless Man to smithereens. His body collapses in a TAINTED PUDDLE OF RAIN AND BLOOD. 7.

TIM (reacts) Whhhhhaat the FUCKING FUCK, man?! The POLICE OFFICERS now turn their guns on Tim. POLICE OFFICER #1 DROP the chips and put your hands in the air, scum sucka! Tim throws his hands up, dropping the chips. POLICE OFFICER #2 (to Officer #1) Scum sucka...I like it. POLICE OFFICER #1 (to Officer #2) Thanks. Libtard was feeling a bit uninspired. MEANWHILE: Tim has slowly started backing up...unaware, however, of the ORANGE TRAFFIC CONE guarding an OPEN MANHOLE COVER just a few feet behind. TIM (to himself) Okay, stay calm. The cops can't kill me if I live stream it As Tim goes to grab his cell phone-- POLICE OFFICER #1 (O.S.) FREEZE--! Tim STOPS walking; just inches from the ORANGE TRAFFIC CONE. TIM (to himself) Oh God, this is it. He closes his eyes. POLICE OFFICER #1 (to Officer 2, aiming at Tim) Should I shoot him?

POLICE OFFICER #2 Geez...I don't know. Do you feel like we'll get in trouble? 8.

As Tim silently resigns himself to his fate, another CRACK OF LIGHTNING suddenly crashes down and knocks him FORWARD. In a daze, Tim rolls over only to suddenly find himself face-to-face with the ORANGE TRAFFIC CONE that had been guarding the open manhole. Only now, it's ALIVE. TRAFFIC CONE (to Tim) You know: it's time's like these I really wish I had a hand to offer. TIM AGHH!!! Tim tries to KICK the CONE, but instead, he SLIPS on Harper's ROBE, which rips from his body as he FALLS into the open manhole, leaving it crumpled on the ground behind. Without hesitation, the CONE jumps in after him. SECONDS LATER: the POLICE OFFICERS peer into the open manhole, where a FLASH FLOOD of rain and sewage RAGES below. POLICE OFFICER #2 Should we go in after him? POLICE OFFICER #1 After who? POLICE OFFICER #2 (impressed) Gregory!

INT. SEWER TUNNELS - CONTINUOUS Tim breaks the surface, GASPING for air as he heads deep into the dark abyss of the sewer tunnels, which split and snake like the roots of a mighty tree. He THRASHES about in an attempt to stay above water; but the current is too strong, and he's PULLED UNDER. UNDERWATER: Tim opens his eyes. The shapes of random objects swirl around him like the tornado of The Wizard of OZ.

A SHOPPING CART. COUCH. BROKEN TV. Tim quickly realizes something isn't quite right. Like the traffic cone, these objects are all ALIVE. 9.

And like Tim, they are also drowning. Unable to believe his eyes, Tim BLACKS OUT.

EXT. BELLAGIO HOTEL AND CASINO - ESTABLISHING - NIGHT The iconic water fountain show plays.

INT. BELLAGIO CASINO - SAME John CHAIN-SMOKES cigarettes and drinks straight from a plastic handle of whiskey. He's sitting on his CHAISE LOUNGE at a VIDEO BLACKJACK MACHINE, three sheets to the wind. ON THE GAME: He draws a TWO OF HEARTS. JOHN Hit me. He hits: EIGHT OF SPADES. TOTAL = TEN Without second thought, he DOUBLES DOWN: KING OF HEARTS. JOHN (cont'd) (stands) Huzzah! A King for a king. (puffs cigarette, flips off machine) Beat that, electric bitch. John leans back confidently, taking another pull of whiskey. The DEALER onscreen DRAWS: an ACE = BLACKJACK. JOHN (cont'd) YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!!! John PUNCHES the screen and the ANIMATED DEALER suddenly transforms into a younger version of LORI. JOHN (cont'd) (shocked) Lori?!

DEALER (LORI) Yes, John, it's me. JOHN But--you're SO young! 10.

LORI That's because it's 1989 me, baby. Mama's Apple Pie. Don't you miss me? The VIRTUAL LORI begins unbuttoning her virtual top. JOHN Oh, honey! YOU HAVE NO IDEA! John gropes the screen. Kisses it. Ravages it. LORI Take me, John. Take me back to our love. Back to paradise city. JOHN Oh, won't you please take me home. VOICE (O.S.) Um... Excuse me... sir? TWO SECURITY GUARDS stand behind John. He pulls back to find the VIDEO MONITOR screen is back to normal. JOHN (acting normal) Gentlemen. How may I help you? GUARD #1 (points to whiskey) You can't drink that on the casino floor. JOHN And? GUARD #1 (confused) ...and you can't make love to the machines. That one should be obvious. I'm going to have to ask you to come with us. He reaches for John's arm, but John quickly YANKS it away. OFF THEIR REACTION:

EXT. BELLAGIO HOTEL AND CASINO - MOMENTS LATER John is tossed out into the rain with his CHAISE LOUNGE. The Security Guards LOCK the doors behind them. 11.

JOHN You're just pissed everyone in there wants to have SEX WITH ME! Soaking wet, and on the ground of a dirty parking lot, John suddenly transitions to being on the VERGE OF TEARS. And as we PULL HIGH INTO THE SKY, he pathetically crawls for his half-drunk plastic handle of whiskey...

EXT. SEWER TUNNELS - NIGHT Tim's eyes SNAP OPEN. He bolts upright, VIOLENTLY COUGHING up a lungful of sewer water. DORIS (O.S.) 'Less you wanna go back in that water, you best keep still, boy. Tim turns around to find DORIS, a withered, old blind-woman in witch-like drags, who is currently steering them down river in a gondola, like that of the Venetian Hotel canals. Scared, Tim scurries back and now accidentally bumps into the ORANGE TRAFFIC CONE (hereafter referred to as EARL). TIM Agh--DON'T TOUCH ME! EARL Why would I want to touch you? TIM I don't know! You're a talking traffic cone! EARL Odd choice...huh? (checks himself out in river) But I think we can make it work. What do you think? Earl looks back, only to find that Tim has been completely silenced by his drastic change of setting:

TIM ...I think I must be dead. 12.

EARL (smirks) Quite the opposite. Earl steps aside with pride as the gondola enters the beginnings of a THRIVING, UNDERGROUND TOWN situated off both sides of the river: VINTAGE NEON. CHEAP THRILLS. All things forgotten by the world above. The INHABITANTS occupy the streets as if they were occupying the real Vegas Strip above. The only difference is that they are mixture of HUMANS and OTHER ANTHROPOMORPHIC CHARACTERS. HIGH HEELS act as prostitutes; DICE play craps with themselves; VEGAS VIC hits on the famous NEON COWGIRL, etc. Back on the raft, Tim GAPES with huge eyes, in awe of the magical world unfolding around him. EARL (cont'd) Welcome, my unstable friend...to the Underbelly.

END OF ACT ONE 13.

ACT TWO

EXT. UNDERBELLY - DOCK - LATER As Doris ties the gondola off, Tim soaks in the colorful sights his new surroundings... From behind, an old-timey SEA CHANTEY is heard as another gondola reaches the dock, ferrying a group of DRUNK LEPRECHAUNS. LEPRECHAUN LEADER (singing) Oh, another pint of whiskey wouldn't do me any harm! REST OF GROUP (harmonizing) Oh, another pint of whiskey wouldn't do us any harm! The Leprechauns drunkenly stumble past Tim and Earl. ALL IN UNISON (the finale) AND WE'LL ALL BLOW CHUNKS TO-NIGHT! Tim is stunned. He looks to Earl, who only smiles back. DORIS (O.S.) (coughs) A-hem. Tim turns around to find Doris with her hand outstretched, awaiting payment. He turns his pockets out. They're empty. TIM I'm sorry, I don't have any money. DORIS (grunts, to Tim) Enjoy your stay then, boy. Tim looks at Earl for help: EARL And where would I keep it?

Meanwhile, Doris unties the gondola. Tim tries to plead: TIM How am I supposed to get back then? 14.

DORIS Back where? TIM Home! DORIS I am home! Earl steps up to Tim: EARL (to Tim) What's the matter? TIM Nothing...just, maybe I should go back with her? EARL (inspects Tim) To the place you ran away from? TIM Yeah, it's just...they could be looking for me: my parents; I don't want them to worry. EARL Right. Of course. Because they're so concerned with your condition... (smiles) Best of luck to ya. And with that, Earl hops off, leaving Tim alone. TIM (to himself) Condition? By the time Tim remembers his current predicament, Doris is already floating away. TIM (cont'd) (calls after Doris) Whoa! Hey--Wait for me! DORIS Who's me? As Doris continues to drift further away, Tim tries to race alongside, looking for a dock or anything to reach her raft. 15.

TIM Me! Over here! Just--pull-over! DORIS Pull where? There? Tim reaches a dock, which Doris is en-route to pass beside. TIM HERE! As Doris approaches, she sticks her OAR out to Tim... TIM (cont'd) Yes! That's it! He's almost got a finger on it when, suddenly, Doris aggressively JABS him in the ribs as she passes by: DORIS Tickle, tickle. Tim DOUBLES OVER to protect himself from the sharp blows. When he looks back up, Doris is CRACKING UP at herself as she drifts out of sight... TIM (looks around) What the fuck is going on?

EXT. UNDERBELLY - MAIN STREET - MOMENTS LATER Earl hops along the sidewalk. TIM (distant) Hey! Cone! Tim catches up Earl. TIM (cont'd) The old woman ditched me. EARL Earl.

TIM Her name is Earl? EARL No. My name is Earl. 16.

TIM Hey--I used to have an imaginary friend named, Earl! EARL You don't say... TIM (looks around) Yeah, but that was a long time ago; when my parents first split up. (re: surroundings) So, uh, what exactly is this place? EARL Depends... To some, it's just as it seems: a network of underground sewer tunnels. TIM And to others? EARL (cryptic) The place where Pinocchio went to rescue his father. We PULL OUT for a better view as Tim and Earl head deeper into the action...

EXT. UNDERBELLY - MOMENTS LATER They pass a group of DICE using their bodies to play craps. BETTING ON-LOOKERS CHEER them on. TIM (to Earl) Were those dice, playing craps with...their own bodies? EARL Good to know your eyes are better than the old woman's. TIM But that's impossible!

EARL Say's the dude talking to a cone. Tim gets distracted and STOPS WALKING. 17.

TIM Wait! Hold up-- Earl STOPS. TIM (cont'd) (points up) Look! A HUGE MARQUEE hangs above the theatre entrance: UNDERBELLY'S GOT TALENT: TONIGHT ONLY 1ST PRIZE: ONE-WAY TICKET TO ABOVE THE STRIP TIM (cont'd) (to Earl) Harper always said I was kinda good at impressions. Tim's eyes the sign (his ticket home), somewhat hopeful for the first time... CROSS DISSOLVE TO:

INT. JOHN'S OFFICE - SAME JOHN'S WATERY EYES FILL THE FRAME. A SINGLE TEAR DROP falls onto a framed photo of himself and Lori, much younger, much happier. JOHN (sniffs) You had a good run, John Boy... He sets the photo down, allowing us to realize that he's standing on his CHAISE LOUNGE in his underwear; with his wet clothes tied together into a makeshift noose, wrapped around his neck. JOHN (cont'd) ...But nothing good lasts forever. He steps off the CHAISE LOUNGE and HANGS. Almost immediately, there's a KNOCK at the door.

HARPER (O.S.) DAD? ARE YOU IN THERE? 18.

JOHN (choking) Harper? (to himself) Shit. Shit. Shit. John struggles to regain footing. THE DOOR BURSTS OPEN: HARPER Dad--? OH MY GOD!! Harper rushes in and helps John find his footing. He removes his makeshift noose and takes a moment to catch his breath. JOHN I, uh...I can imagine how peculiar this must look... HARPER Hey--Everyone's got their kinks. JOHN What..? (remembers he's in his undies) Oh god, NO! I was TRYING to kill myself. HARPER Ah...a much better thing for a child to know about their father. John crosses the room and grabs his WHISKEY BOTTLE. JOHN Yeah, yeah...go ahead, judge me. You are your mother's daughter after all. (drinks) What are you even doing here? HARPER I'm looking for Tim. JOHN Yeah, well, I'm waiting for Godot.

HARPER I called Mom. She said he had my work robe, and also that he ran away? 19.

JOHN More like "fled away". John goes for GLASS #2 but Harper KNOCKS it out of his hands and PINS John against the wall. JOHN (cont'd) Hey--that was from a client! HARPER What did you guys do to him? JOHN Your mother-- Harper tightens her grip. JOHN (cont'd) WE*--got into a little argument about who was getting what in the divorce. HARPER You guys are getting divorced AGAIN? Why didn't Tim mention that when I talked to him over the weekend? JOHN (choking) He found out during the argument. Harper let's John go. He falls to the ground. HARPER You should never have had kids. JOHN (gasping for breath) I know. Harper PULLS him to his feet, and toward the door. JOHN (cont'd) Where are we going? HARPER To find the only member of our family who isn't totally fucked, before it's too late.

John manages to swipe his WHISKEY on the way out. 20.

INT. UNDERBELLY THEATRE - BACKSTAGE - NIGHT Meanwhile, Tim and Earl are backstage with all the contestants preparing their acts: MAGICIANS, ACROBATS, STAND-UP COMEDIANS, SHOWGIRLS, etc. TIM (nervous) I don't think I can do this. EARL Why? One of these clowns say something? Behind them, a GROUP OF CLOWNS packs themselves into a TINY CAR. TIM No, I'm just not really good at standing up in front of people. EARL Because you don't think you have a voice? Or because you think your voice is worthless? Tim silently acknowledges: Both. EARL (cont'd) They don't know you. Tim waits for him to continue... EARL (cont'd) Only you know you, which is what their perception is predicated on. (pause) So you can get up there, full of self-doubt, and bomb catastrophically. OR...you can remind yourself the times you made your sister laugh with your Elvis impersonation, and kill. (Tim reacts) Either way, you walk away; still breathing. Earl lets Tim stew on that.

EARL (cont'd) I'm gonna go get a seat. He starts to walk off, but turns back: 21. EARL (cont'd) And if it helps, don't forget: those technically aren't people out there. Tim smiles. TIM Thanks, Earl. Earl winks, and exits. The lights DIM. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Ladies and Gentlethings, welcome to another Underbelly's Got Talent! ROWDY CHEERING. Tim GULPS.

END OF ACT TWO 22.

ACT THREE

INT. HARPER'S CAR - NIGHT Harper drives as John continues his whiskey-cigarette bender in the passenger seat. HARPER If you spill that, I swear to god... JOHN What--you're gonna leave me too? Harper looks at John, concerned. HARPER You need to get your shit together. JOHN Why? (waves bottle) None of this matters. We live, we cry, we die...we get divorced. It's all absurd. John takes a fat swig: it goes down wrong. He gags. HARPER Are you gonna throw up?! John nods yes. Harper slams on her brakes.

EXT. HARPER'S CAR - SAME John BLOWS CHUNKS out his door. A passing TOURIST sees. TOURIST Hell yeah, BRO! VEGAS!!

INT. HARPER'S CAR - SAME John leans back inside. HARPER You good?

John gives a pitiful two thumbs up as he wipes his mouth. 23.

JOHN Looks like there's some action down there. Harper looks ahead and spots several COP CARS and OTHER EMERGENCY VEHICLES, including a CORONER VAN. Then, she sees the CORONER himself, who, unmistakably, is carrying her ROBE! HARPER Holy shit. Close the door!!

EXT. CRIME SCENE - MOMENTS LATER POLICE OFFICER #1 and #2 (from earlier) are eating the stolen SUBWAY POTATO CHIPS outside the POLICE PERIMETER as the CORONER carts the HOMELESS MAN'S DEAD BODY past. Harper and John run up: HARPER Was that a teenage boy under there? POLICE OFFICER #1 Wha- That guy? Nah... Just some lousy bum we took care of. Police Officer #2 gives him a FIST BUMP. HARPER Oh, thank god. (regrouping) My brother's missing. Maybe you've seen him? Harper shows a PICTURE OF TIM on her phone. Police Officer #1 SPITS OUT his chips. POLICE OFFICER #2 (nervous) MY..! What a fine looking young man, right there! Ain't that right, Gregory? POLICE OFFICER #1 (very nervous) Hoowee, that's right. No way we'd forget a face like that! Harper puts her phone away, dejected. 24.

HARPER Sorry to bother you. She and John walk away. The COPS FOLD in relief.

EXT. STREET - MOMENTS LATER Harper and John walk back to Harper's car as the CORONER VAN drives off. JOHN Hey now...what's this? John picks up HARPER'S ROBE from the top of a TRASH CAN. HARPER That's my robe! She rips it from John's hands. HARPER (cont'd) That means Tim WAS here! JOHN Weird... (turns back) You think those Cops lied to us? Harper looks back to see the Police Officers walking away, leaving the OPENED MANHOLE cover un-guarded. HARPER It'd be weirder if they didn't... MOMENTS LATER: From inside the manhole, Harper and John peer down inside. JOHN You wanna go in there, don't you? HARPER Yep. JOHN (motions) Ladies first.

Harper stares him down... 25.

INT. "UNDERBELLY'S GOT TALENT" SIDE STAGE - SAME An ACTUAL CARROT TOP (with a box of props) walks off stage to BOOMING APPLAUSE. CARROT TOP (smug, to Tim) Good luck carrot-topping that! TIM (to himself) They're not even people...they're not even people... The lights DIM again, and the APPLAUSE SETTLES. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) And for our final act of the night, please put your hands together for: TIM...Rimmer? (then) That can't be right. Tim swallows hard.

INT. "UNDERBELLY'S GOT TALENT" MAIN STAGE - CONTINUOUS Tim slinks on stage, stepping into the spotlight. It's blinding, but he's able to somewhat make out a packed house comprised of WACKY CHARACTERS. TIM (into mic, nervous) Hello. CRICKETS. Literally: sitting in the audience, unamused. TIM (cont'd) My name is Tim. And I'm going to do for you today, the Elvis Presley. AUDIENCE MEMBER (O.S.) You fuckin' suck, Tim! Tim tries to play cool: TIM (bad Elvis impression) Thank you. Thank you very much. DEAD SILENCE... 26.

TIM (cont'd) Okay. Uh...here we go, I guess. Tim walks upstage toward the curtain, and stops with his back facing the audience leaving him COVERED IN DARKNESS. While he tries to gather his nerves, BOOS slowly start to emanate from the crowd. It only makes him more nervous. Then: EARL (O.S.) Psst... Earl peeks his head out from behind the curtains. TIM I can't do it! These people are going to tear me apart! EARL I thought we already established they aren't people. TIM Well...yeah, but-- EARL But what? You're a person, aren't you? Or are you just a piece of furniture for them to place on the line between misery and happiness? Tim catches the reference. He stands up, slightly fueled. TIM No. I'm not going back to that. EARL Don't tell it to me... (nods) Tell those freaks. Earl's words are exactly what Tim needs to hear as his fear finally turns to confidence. Simultaneously, Earl let's out a WHISTLE and over at STAGE LEFT, an ORCHESTRA OF INSTRUMENTS (playing themselves) begin "Also Sprach Zarathustra" by Richard Strauss. From the AUDIENCE POV: The LIGHTS go up. 27.

-- Tim, standing still in the spotlight, pops his shirt collar with a flair. -- He slicks his hair back with a comb in one hand, the other one guiding. The audience grows attentive... -- To seal the deal, Tim reaches down and rips off the side flaps of his pants, revealing the PERFECT ELVIS COSTUME. The crowd bursts into a wave of "ooh's & ah's". Finally, the orchestra CRESCENDOS and Tim SPINS forward as Elvis' 'Blue Suede Shoes' hits in full stride. Tim's performance is stellar. He has it all down: the swagger; the lip curl; the sexy hip pops... HE IS MORE THAN ELVIS. In fact, just from looking at him you can tell, that for the first time in a long time, Tim is being his true self. And as his reward, the crowd ROARS.

INT. SEWER TUNNELS - SAME TIME Harper reaches the bottom of the ladder, joining John. JOHN (looks around) There's no way Tim is down here. This place is way too scary. HARPER For him, or you? JOHN Please, I make a living studying the darkness of the mind. (gestures) This--? Jungian child's play. A CLANKING NOISE spooks John. He jumps behind Harper. JOHN (cont'd) What is it? Up ahead, an ominous, HOODED FIGURE huddles over the light of a small campfire. 28.

HARPER Maybe they've seen Tim. She reluctantly leads John forward...

MOMENTS LATER Harper and John cautiously approach the HOODED FIGURE. HARPER (cont'd) Um, excuse me? The HOODED FIGURE turns around: IT'S DORIS. HARPER (cont'd) (to Doris) I'm real sorry to bother you, miss, but we're looking for my little brother. He's missing; and possibly not in the best mental state. We're pretty worried to say the least, and I was wondering if maybe you've seen him? Harper shows Doris the PICTURE OF TIM on her phone. DORIS I can't see. JOHN (leans in, to Harper) Turn up the brightness. DORIS No, man--I'm blind. Doris reveals her EYES to John. JOHN Good Lord... Harper smacks John's arm. JOHN (cont'd) Ow! DORIS (re: Tim) What's the boye sound like? JOHN ...Weak? 29.

HARPER Dad! DORIS (matter of fact) Ah...You must mean Tim. HARPER (shocked) YES! Wait--You know my brother? DORIS Saved his life, thank you very much. Kid musta fell in here during the storm. I pulled him out and ferried him to safety. JOHN (looks around) Well, where is he now? Doris points into the darkness. DORIS Down there with the cone still, I suppose. JOHN The cone? DORIS The traffic cone. Earl, I think he called him? I don't remember. Look: I dropped your brother off down river; place the homeless folk down here call The Underbelly. Harper and John stare into the dark abyss of the tunnel with uneasy eyes. DORIS (cont'd) Best let me guide you. Most who go down there alone never come back. (then) Not the same, at least. Doris boards her RAFT as John and Harper look at each other, gauging whether or not they should trust the old bat.

DORIS (cont'd) Of course, I'll need double payment...considering the boy still owes me too. 30.

John pulls out a HUNDRED DOLLAR BILL. JOHN How's this? Doris BLINKS. DORIS How's what? OFF HARPER, re: John's flub...

INT. "GOT TALENT" BACKSTAGE - SAME TIME Tim exits the stage as BOUQUETS OF FLOWERS and THUNDEROUS CHEERS are hurled his way. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Ladies and gentlemen, Elvis has officially left the building!!! Another burst of CHEERS. Chants of "TIM, TIM, TIM..!" Tim runs to Earl: TIM Earl! I did it! You were the voice I needed to hear. The confidence I've been looking for! (hugs Earl) I never want this feeling to end! A THEATRE PRODUCTION ASSISTANT walks up to Tim and hands him a POKER CHIP that says "ONE-WAY TICKET TO ABOVE THE STRIP". TIM (cont'd) (smiles, to Earl) Think anyone will miss me if we take a little time to celebrate? EARL (winks) Doubt it. Tim smiles.

EXT. UNDERBELLY - MAIN STREET - LATER Tim and Earl stumble through the Underbelly, singing the same SEA CHANTEY as the Leprechauns from before. 31.

TIM/EARL And we'll all stay drunk tonight! Tim LAUGHS as they reach the dock where Tim was first dropped off by Doris. TIM (to Earl) Say...Maybe I don't have to go back just yet. EARL What about your parents? TIM Honestly...they probably haven't even realized I'm still gone; but, now that you mention it, Harper is probably looking for-- Tim suddenly realizes he lost her ROBE. TIM (cont'd) Shit! Harper's robe! I must have dropped it somewhere down here. Tim starts looking around frantically. TIM (cont'd) Maybe I left it at the theatre? Or did you see it when we were walking? EARL The only thing you brought down here was yourself. TIM No--I had it! For sure when I fell into the manhole, at least. EARL But you didn't fall into the manhole. Tim stops and looks at Earl: TIM What do you mean?

EARL You fell into yourself. (off Tim) All I did was help you take the leap. 32.

TIM What are you talking about? The leap? EARL (re: Underbelly) You said it yourself: this place isn't real. Well--it is, just in a different way of understanding. (off Tim's confusion) You were at the end of your rope up there, remember? A runaway; with nowhere to go...yet wanting to go home -- but to a REAL home, where you could be the person you always wanted others to see. (beat) But you had buried that "home" down here, in the dark; and to find it, things first had to fall apart. (to himself, impressed) Goddamn, that was some straight up Dr. Suess shit. Meanwhile, Tim has begun to freak the fuck out. TIM Earl, what the hell are you talking about?! I just want to go home, man! EARL And I'm saying perhaps you already are. TIM NO! I don't want to be here anymore! (points above) I want to go back to that HOME!! I want to go-- HARPER (O.S.) TIM?! Tim QUICKLY SPINS around to find Harper and John, staring back at him from afar. And their sunken faces say it all:

JOHN (solemn) Jesus Christ, son. 33.

Simultaneously, Harper busts into SOBS and buries her head in John's shoulder. Off their reactions, Tim turns back to Earl: TIM Why are they looking at me like that? EARL Like you're crazy? And finally, we SEE what John and Harper see: The Underbelly is completely gone. Doesn't even exist. Everything is now what it really is: just plain ol' sewer tunnels turned into nothing more than an underground skid row. (NOTE: This is how the tunnels are actually in real life) In the midst of this revelation, Tim breaks down and embraces Earl... Only Earl is back to being a normal, inanimate traffic-cone. We watch from behind John and Harper, as Tim desperately SHOUTS AND CRIES at Earl like a raving mad-man. HARPER We have to help him, dad. A tear falls from John's eye. JOHN I know baby. We will... (gags) But not down here. (then) Place smells like shit.

END ACT THREE 34.

TAG

EXT. STREET - NIGHT POLICE OFFICERS #1 & #2 walk back to their car. Police Officer #1 balls up an EMPTY BAG OF CHIPS and shoots it into the OPEN MANHOLE COVER. POLICE OFFICER #1 Kobe! He misses. Police Officer #2 walks over and picks it up. He looks down at the OPEN MANHOLE. POLICE OFFICER #2 Hmm...This is a hazard. He bends down and SLIDES the cover back on, effectively sealing the entrance to the tunnels. POLICE OFFICER #1 And who says all we do is kill innocent folk? They LAUGH and hop in their COP CA, WHIPPING a few donuts before finally driving off into the GLISTENING NEON of the VEGAS STRIP...while we stay on the sealed manhole cover...

SLAM TO BLACK.

END PILOT