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LOCAL AND STATS Barry Lyrm to talk vote $i^ count in national ele^tkms on Reiigtous Right By Suun Jordan MafoHty LesderjcMft ftnmo to allow Barryiynn^ executive directorof The Section thrs month will see SONDA (i^e Sexual Orientadon Americans United for Separation many and gay New Yoricers Non-Dtscrimination Act) onto the of Church and State, will give a getting behind the candidates who floor for a vote, althou^ thou­ free lecture here on Nov. 5 at support gay righcs. sands of lesbian and gay New York­ 7:30 p.m. at Downtown United The Empire State Pride Agenda ers had asked him to do so. Presbyterian Church, 121 N. has endorsed Rep. Charies Schumer Tim Sweeney, deputy executive FicduighSt. in his race agafnst Sen. Af D'Amato. director of ESPA, says that the or­ Lynn wiil speak on "The Reli­ Thfs marks the first time that ESPA ganisation appreciates D'Amato's gious Right— Radically Wrong/* has made a Senate endorsement. support in Congress for AIDS fund- A member of the Washington, Matt Foreman. ESPA's executive ing. gays In the mlRtary and the & D.C. bar, and an ordained minis­ director, said, "We simply cannot Employment Non-Dtscrimination ter, Lynn has appeared often on At the candMgl«t vigil (br gay-bashing victim Matthew Shepard, held ignore Sen. D'Amato*i unicfue role Act. However, Sweeney said, "De­ national TV and radio to discuss at Corpus Christi Church on Oct 19. over the last 18 years as the archi­ spite Sen. D'Amato's support of First Amendment issues, and has tect and de ^cto leader ofthe New this legislation. Rep. Schumer sim­ published essays and op-ed pieces Yoric State RepubUcan Party as well ply has a much better record on gay in (JS/\ Todoy. The Wa// Street as flag-bearer of tho state Conser­ issues for a much k^nger time." JQUrt^ai, and many other publica­ vative Party. BothTSarties have re­ Sweeney saki thao: m cbmp^ng tions. peatedly blocked efforts to enact thc Congre$si6nM vodng records Lynn's talk is sponsored by the statewide anti-discnmination legis­ of Schumerand D'Amato, Schumer Rochester Chapter of Americans lation and hate crimes legislation had cc^nsistently hi^er ratings from United for Separation of Church that would provide equal rights and groups like the Human Rights Cam­ and State. For information call equal protection for lesbian and gay paign. In the 103rd Congress, 225-7271 or 334-2989. New Yorkers, Indeed, the Republi- SchumeKs rating was IOO percent, Key West party in can*controlled State Senate has as compared to 40 percent fbr refused even to allow a vote on D'Amato; In the 104th Congress Sodus Point to anti^dlscrinwnatlon legislation to Schumer rated 89 percent whtie take place, Ahhough Sen. 0*Amato D'Amato rated 75 percent. The support ARI has criticized fellow Republican Christian Coetition, meanwhite, The Bay Street Hotel, Sodus senators ^ W^Nngcon fbr their Point's premiere gcHjrmet res­ rating anti-gay, pn>-IUi|gious RH^ intokrwice, in the^SenatoKs home taurant owned and operated by vodng in the current Con^-ess^ stttte imi own party, bbtsmt db- rated Schunter seven percent master chcft Anne and Douglas crfmlftetkNi iestin the order ofthe against 82 percent for D'Amato. Mcljeod, will once a^un lend rts day. We smm a Uf

'A • *' * m • M ' « «' ^' *i '-• i-*'*-*-.i*i****»«'. «-'4,-*-A-*''*-«*>-*T*''*'«<^-«V4-«'"«t-i jk-*-*iT*'» A «r*-*'*** ' * -* * iA'A'«'A-*'A *.'-4H- J^7* «. '« '*'^ '^ ^ * 4l'4h"«'*.Jd» * * •'* *' NvclMsn cofitinuwl frittm p* I who has been strongly criticized by gay and Cocigrwss. Many ga^acttviscs b» the 0«mo. AIDS/HIV actMsts for his Septenr^r com- uiidU*Wlnt writers »r» crmtic Hrvy md eutsWa It ane quastlonltig merdab backing mandatory testing of rape dnlF ioKmm^ Oo noc tttemsu^ t^mct HRCk mdorsmmit and abo D'Amato's suspects for HIV. and the criminalization of dto eoNMltve amcwlt of dM Gqp AlkMic* conwniment to f^ rights. D'Amato met ofdieOafMMeY^erdw&n^OoMt. knowing transmMon of the virus. Others W« «flK pdTKlMsan scdieedKor^ diicre* wHh ga/ kadera In Scptamber under the say that Splfzer*f strong card is the mere hict Hon ind en a «p«c» avsMielMBlLWa w« auspices of the fKC; groups represented that he Is running agihinst the ^ctremely vicwpointsth at !0^M'% ^ ^ ^ noc print penend Mids en indMdiiiiii. inekidttd the Empire State Fride Agenda. homophobic Dennb Vacco, who conducted Jan^ Hakkn ofthe LMtibda Democrats a gay-bashing campa^ ^pln$t open lesbian of the Bronx and Laum HorHson of Karen Burstein in 1994, and who ended antl- Manhattan's Gay and Lesbian Independent dbcrimlnation protection for gays working Democrats (GLID), have criticized in the Attomey Generates office. Vacco has > LOCAL AND STATE NEWS D'Amaco'a stand on women's right to also conrte under fire for Nring right wing choose,anfioi^other issues. Wayne MahHce, loyalists rather than qualified attomeys. Coots Bi:ewing Coa^M% is^ psiM^ president of the leabian and Gay Demo­ On the national scene, a report released 25 years ago this month,.. company with wtdiovi^eejaf^ cratic Club of Queens, told the %ny news on Sept. 16 by the National Gay and Lesbian f- Coors Co* denies From the Empty Closet, November 1973 Lying about l€3¥e holders. Should CkKJks^^ oip^iiiy i^^^ that he feels D'Amato's recent support of Task Force indicates that gay, lesbian and November saw the election of Midge responsibility held accountable ftwr the ccnOEtijb^^Mis ^u^tjr gay issues is "merely lip service" Schun>er bisexual voters made up 8.9 percent of the However, not all the elected candidates Costanza to City Council. She had been To the Editor: belief of thousand of indtviduai sllfeai^fitbM^ has been a longtin>e supporter ofgay rights, vote in mid-sized cities In the 1996 elections. were supportive ofgay rights. Andrew Celli, strongly supported by many in the ^y com­ Thc •'Opinion'* piece ^epscmber ^ issue) but voted for the antj*gay Defense o^ Mar­ The NGLTF says that the gay vote is **size- elected to County Court, had a record of munity, who felt that, as the Etnpty Chset put "narrow-mindedness on sexual matters/' by Michele Spring-Moore asks how gay- If that is the standard we choose to set, i riage Act in 1996 (as did D'Amato). He is able and growing," and that in this month's it, "gays will finally have a person in office who Sheriff Lombard, also elected in Nq^mber firicndly is Coors Brewing Company. Aside certainly don't want to be the ooe tespoanble currentty a co^sponsor of the federal Hate off*year election, voter turnout is expected he Reiigious Right is telling lies. Lies about lesbian, gay, bisexual and will listen and will act responsibly on matters 1973, said he intended to expand the regis­ from the fact that the article contained many fbr eiifbrcii^ it. Hunk of all die prodtuis you Crimes Prevention Act, now before Con­ to be small, which could make the LGBT vote Americans. Lies about human sexuality. Lies about love. The rhetoric of interest to gay p€x>ple." tration of private citizens and move the innuendoes, rumors and blatandy false claims, use every day. How many companies make gress. Many gay activists had supported especially significant. finom the pulpit that gays must never be accepted reinforces and sanctifies the gay- Costanza was endorsed by Gays for Politi­ "Rochester homofiie" to county control, T I thinkit's an intetesting question, but not the Mark Green, who lost the primary race to those products? How miny shareholders do The 35-p3ge report, **Out and Voting," bashing mentality that took Matthew Shepard's life. It allows violent young males who need to cal Action, as were three other Council because, as Lombard was quoted as saying. one we shm^ be debating. The tealqucstion those companies represent? How many, aad Schumer, because Green has a two-decade states that the LGBT voting block receives prove their "manhood" to feel they ate on a mission from God. Other even more twisted tnaies candkiates who were elected. GPA -endorsed "The sex deviate is highly mobile in the to asit is how gay-fiiendly are any of the wiuch, organizations do those sharehoklers record of very strong support for the gay much less publicity than other blocks, but at can pursue this holy tnission by joining an ultra-right terrorist group like the KKK or Aryan Bemard Ehmann won a County Legislature community.-NA^en Identified and brought to companies whose products we purchase? support? Are wc teaHy gping to buy * company's community and has endorsed same sex five percent it is as important as other defin­ Brotherhood^ with their agendas of fascism, hate and murder. race in the 23rd district, and two GPA- thc attention of the registry files, early ap­ What standards are we, as membets of thc products only if we agree with every donadon marriage. able segments of the electorate (for ex­ The Big Double Lie is a) " is evil and abnormal," and b) "faith in God" (and a endorsed judges also won (Cassetti and prehensions can be effected, and possibly gay, lesbian- bisexual and transgendered com­ and opinion of each individual stockholder? Locally, the race to watch, according to ample. Latinos 4.5 percent; Jews 3.4 percent. hefty check to your favorite right witig gtoup) "can miraculously change your sexual natute and Provenzano). Candidates opposed by GPA prevent the tragedies perpetrated by vio­ munity, going to set for all companies, not Doesn't seem very realistic, does it? ESPA upstate field manager Allan Richards, Asian Americans I.i percenc)The report, make you the happy heterosexual fundatnen- which is ptetty ironic when you consider that who lost their races included D.A. Relin lence-prone sex offenders." The Empty Qoset just Coors Brewing Company? Because, let's It's time fot the GLBT community to create is Rep. Susan John's can^paign against Demo- written by Rutgers professor Robert W. talist God intended you to be, before you were the Nazis imprisoned and murdered thou­ (whose questionnaire v^^s rated highly but commented, "While that doesn't sound like feee it, it*s not exactiy fair to have one set of a set of standards to which evety com pany is crat-turned-RepublicanCharles Eber. Bailey, shows that the GLB vote is growing recruited by agents of Satan." sands ofgays in their campaign to destroy the standatds for Coots and another set fbr ev­ who was "questioned on the basis of his feig- us, we fear Lombard meons us. If he does, the held accountable. There is a tnintmu^xi level of Richards said, *1t*s imporcant that Susan be and that self-identification anrrong gay voters The Family Research Council and the Cen- Getman gay movement, and would have loved eryone else. hunting performance as assistant DA"). Ex- sheriffs department will begin actively to acceptable behavior that wc must demand of elected to the Assembly because she's been is up from L3in 1992 to five percent in 1996. ter for Reclaiming America are among the all the activities of the Rabid Right. History is mayor Stephen May had been rejected by compile files on the people suspected of Is it enough to include every company who "wants our business. But, a strong voice, not only for the gay and Bailey said that because mid-sized cities most shameless pushers of the Big Lie. Their apparendy not Robertson's strong point, any GPA "on the basis ofhis lack of concern," and being homosexual, a practice of question­ in a company's non- policy? lesbian community, but also for the greater (between 50,000 and 500,000) are often new ad campaigti, '*Truth in Love," has to be more than geology and meteorology, as he whatever standard we set, if Coors fails to lost the election, as did a School Board able constitutionality, but long followed by Coors has done so since 1978 Rochester community. She's been a strong "swing" congressional districts, the com­ one of this century's most flagrant violations proved with his predictions of earthquakes and measure up, I can't imag^ie any other ma|or candidate criticized by GPA "for his open the.Rochester police." It is enough to offer same-sex domestic voice on good public policy for thc state. paratively high gay vote in those areas, com­ of truth-in-advertising. Carole Shields, presi­ hurricanes sent by You Know Who to punish cotporation will make the grade. hostility." partner benefits? Coors has done so since The Republican Assembly Campaign Com- bined with the gay community's tendency to dent of Peopie for the American Way, com­ Orlando, Fla, for Disney's Gay Days, Maty Cheney 1995. mittee (RAC) is putting a lot of money into vote for Democrats over Republicans, could people. The group formed a circle in the ments, "If this campaign is about truth or love, Fortunately, gays are fighting back against Cotpotate Relations Manager - Gey end taking the entire avenue. It is enough to sponsor events in thc Eber*s campaign to try and win a Demo­ mean that gays may piay an important role in darkened church where the only light was then George Orwell must be its honorary the lies. The National Gay and Lesbian Task Lesbian Conoi&uiuty March organizer Sarah Pursley of the GLBT community, to contribute co our or­ cratic seat and weaken the Speaker's posi­ this election. "Swing" districts are those in the candles on the altar and fiashtights held by chairman. No matter how the Religious Right Force (with Political Research Associates and Coon Brewing Company Anti-Violence Project said. "By arresting ganizations, and, to buy advertisements in which neither Democrats nor Republicans parishioners who came to the microphone tries to dress it up, bigotry is still bigotry." Farmers in Faith) released a new report on 31110th S. tion. Susan's always been in a ntarginat almost all the march organizers and both our publications? Coors is proud to sponsor district — it's got a city/suburban makeup, have strongholds, so that either party stands to offer prayers. Or\e man said, "There has the poltce negotiators and leaving 7,000 T>ie Center for Reclaitning America (for Oct. IS which exaiTiines the political nature Golden* Colo. 80401 GLBT events across thc county, such as the and only a five percent difference between a good chance of winning. been far too much silence about the discrimi­ fired-up marchers, they were not protect' white heterosexuai fundamentalists, appar­ 3L{\^ role €i{ xhe "ex-gay" ministry movement. Michek Spring^Moore responds: It*s worth not­ Rochester picnic this Summer; to -/gny nevys; National Gay and Lesbian Task nation against giy and lesbian people... We ing the city, they were invia'ng chaos. They endy) calls itself an outreach program of the Cakklated Compassion: How the Ex-Gtrf Movement ing that although Mary Cheney accuses me of Democratic and Republican voters." support otganizations such as GLAAD, thc Force must not be silent.. We should be outraged, didn't even try to negotiate with us." Rev. James D. Kennedy's Coral Ridge Minis­ Serves the Right's Attack on Democracy ^hov/zth'jX^ writing an opinion piece filled with "innuen- In the race for govemor, Peter Vallone, LA Gay and Lesbian Center, the San Diego and should speak loudly that this kind of VS/hen the march turned down 43 rd St. to tries in Ft. Lauderdale, Fla, TTiis sinister hate far from offering "hope and healing" (Healing dos, rumors and blatantly false claims," she Democratic challenger to Pataki, is viewed Center and others, and, to support such Shepard continued from p. I violence will not be tolerated." avoid a wall of police vans, they were cut off group recendy sent out a fundraising appeal for what? Loving rhc "wrong" people?) the ex- doesn't bother to refute any, but instead re­ by gay activists as better than Pataki on gay publications as Outt Genre, The Adstoeate, Ciri- and trapped, and police then attacked the warning potential donors that "the homo­ gay ministry, or intlustr\% or cult or whatever it peats the Coors Brewing Company's usual set issues, but they acknowledge that Valione hate crimes of any kind. friends, LN and many local GLBT publica­ marchers, with one threatening to kill march­ sexual movement has already invaded our should be called, "actually serves as camou­ of lies and then trots out Coors' non-discrimi­ has only just begun to support gay rights. In The Empire State Pride Agenda statistics March for Shepard in tions. ers and one screaming "Get back, faggots!" schools," and "children are being targeted for flage for a retooled and reinvigorated assault nation policy and domestic parmer benefits 1986 he was among the minority opposing on anti-gay violence indicate that nationally, Or, are wc going to set thc standard so N.Y.C. turns violent Mounted police galloped thetr horses into 'gay sex."' If that won't scare them into writing by the religious right on the legal protections again. the NT.Cicy Council's non-discrimination 196 known incidents occurred on campuses high that we hold companies responsible for the group of people, injuring several. At those hefty checks, nothing will. CRA*s direc- against discrimination for gay, lesbian, bisexual But I'm glad to address Ms. Cheney's ques- law, Recendy, however, Valione has "come and in schools in the past year. This repre­ as police attack gays the actions, contriburions and beliefs of a least two women injured by the horses torjanet Foiger announced on NBC's NtgbtHne and transgender persons." a long way on our issues." according to sents eight percent of atl attacks on gay and few individual shareholders? Because that ts, aons. Is it enough to include sexual orientation A "political funeral" heki in New York City were hospitalized. onjuly 15 that she would "very much support" On Oct. 8 thc Human Rights Campaign Sterling Zinsmayer ofthe Stonewall Demo­ lesbian people. the standard suggested by Ms. Spting-Moore. on Oct. 19 to remember Matthew Shepard After re-groupitig. the march ended peace­ criminal penalties for homosexual contact. launched what they call the Ray of Light Project Letl:er» Gontimi«d on p. 10 crats, a moderate gay group. Activistgroups In New York State, there were 12 re­ exploded into violence as police arrested all fully at Madison Park, where speeches eulo­ How about some criminal penalties for lying, to monitor the abuses of ex-gay tninistries. The who backed James Larocca* the only pri­ ported incidents of anti'gay assaults on stu­ the organizers, marshals and polke negotia­ gizing Shepard were given. March organiz- slandering and spreading hate? Project will compile information ftom ex-Ex- *hope' or *heaUng' or 'understanding,* but rather heterosexual spouse (and to everyone else), or mary candidate for govemor who endorsed dents last year, representing two percent of about intolerance, decepdon and motal bank­ spend their lives alone and celibate, if they same sex marriage, ara now moving toward tors, and then attacked marchers, according ers had not requested a permit due to the Don Wildmon of Focus on the Family warns Gays as well as from leaders in thc mental homophobic attacks on N.Y. gays. In 1997, ruptcy. This new campaign represents what want. But they cannot choose not to have chose Vsdione, and many have endorsed him, with to the Anti-Vtolence Project. long waiting period, but believed that police his supporters that the only way for hotno- heal th field, who know that "reparative therap/* according to ESPA, there was a 29.6 percent has become a relendess, well-financed and feelings, nor can they magically tum into some­ Around 7.000 people attended the march, would observe their agreement to march sexuals to reproduce is "to RECRUIT!" (Capi­ is just other term for psychological terrorism. the exception of the Queens Democratic increase in the number of gay victims aged reprehensible assault on the lesbian, gay, bi­ thing thcy ate not. Attempts to force them to gathering at the Plara Hotel at 59th Sc and down a section of Fifth Ave. Over IOO tal letters and exclamation point his). This In August 1997 the American Psycholc^cal Club (Vallone's home district). Vy/ayne 18 to 21 sexual and transgender community." do so have resulted in failure, despair and Fifth Ave. The march was intended to be a people were arrested, including transgender would come as quite a surprise to the millions Association overwhelmingly passed a resolu­ Mahike said, "Vallone refuses to acknowt* A Rochester man operating a coffeehouse Tortured, sclf-hatiiig gay people — those suicide. We can otily tell our sisters and broth­ peaceful show of grief and gay solidarity. author/activist Leslie Feinberg, who was of lesbian and gay biological parents out there, tion suting that there is no scientific evidence edge that there's a gay community in in Casper, Wyo., who knew Shepard, told who have been brainwashed to belteve that However, police arrested the march organiz­ able to call supporters from inside the jail, but never mind. And why should we need to that such "therapy" works; psychology, of ers napped in the "Ex-Files" that thc truth is Queens," the Etrtpty Goset on Oct. IS that gays there their natural feelings of love snd desire ate ers, including marshals and polke negotia­ and reported that spirits remained strong. "recruit" straights when heterosexual (and even course, is another subject in which Pat and his out d)ere — outside the walls of the hate- The Democratic candidate with the least are griefstrkken and deeply angry. unnatural, immoral and contrary to religious tors, as soon as the march down Fifth Ave some gay)parents are, as always, producing buddies get an "F." ridden, reactionary poUtical movement tbat gay support, according to %ny news, is Elliot The memorial for Matthew Shepard at -Anti-Violence Project; National Peoples' faith — may choose not to act on those feel­ csUs itself a loving tninistfy. began. The narch proceeded with no lead­ Campaign more than enough to keep gay circuit Joan M. Garry, executive director ofthe Gay Spitzer, candidate for Attomey General. Corpus Christi on Oct. 19 drew around 100 ings. They can spend tibeit lives lying to a Don't believe the lies. ers, until they overflowed onto 57th St.. Locai news continued on p. 11 parties and lesbian poducks filled to capacity? and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation But then Mr. Wildmon and his kind don't (GLAAD), said on Oct. 7, ".„The unmitigated worry about the truth. This is a holy war, and gall of the people behind this campaign is our confidendal GAGV Membership inciudes an Empty Cioset in war, as wc all know, truth is the first casualty. appalling. When you get rigjst down to it, these A Publication of the Gay Alliaace Y subsctipdon mpikd to your home eleven times a ycsixm a pkiin Speaking of war, the ever-lovely Miss Pat groups arc showing dicir hand to ^htt eatite of tbe Gciitisee VaOey W'^B^o^*^^ rathetfKK tecdve 7heJEtti^€3t^ Robertson routinely compares gays to Naais, country and their nnessage really isn't about TT* ASaiii tsm. • Hudmm WY T4*07.|»S <*''J;':'i^"-'^'':'^-:1^^S I...... - ^ check tms l>bx: O I Pvr Wore loAiiaMdni Q* (71 fi)i344,M30 I pemm dt I'lr^wimiflB ia •rfchj k mat m Imfciiiiim «(ite «MI w •The Empty Closet • Subscribe! the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley! • Enclosed is a check payable to GAGV Ad«*rwif« piAcT; Th* G«|Mr OoMt daw wt ^tte «diPHriHtlrt«a 4lH I w*ww awtoihtfiiaf t>cplwi>ii^iylw» WUl w liilliiiit^ Ayfc,iUiLiMw«ifV.n«fl<^ia».w€dt(ntt»M->oaa ••BWti>iM«l»yMwpiBli»nUmiifrfitfat«iii^iwaiiiHfWi ^m^'^m NfEMBERSHIP LEVBU (PLBASB CHBCK GhSB) • Please charge my q VISA or q Mastercard account • Renew I f wtnitef pMow if ywa |>muwc die < I Q Individual S25 aruiually • Philanthropist $500 Account No: Exp. 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WiN see dw«a inddMetnaias. wyonthlnk an •r«l"ga> ligttod»e owipaigrt, compmd administrators Midjtaac^iry^iM*^^ The ruling from the Cook Counqr Com­ meeery amenomencs* to take effact Issue 3 amends die city's not only by the km of tli^youii||Mk biicby homophoMc advwtlseiMncs tfca ahoee to four Inddents the entire prevkMis year. mission on Human R|#its was announced on If enacted, the Riggs amendment wouM charter to proMblc dvlM'^hts Ivwa ban­ the existence of such (rest tittredand Intol- which ran Inoarnewipapwi thh wrtwmtr The House and Senace Judldary Com­ Sept Il.TheCommisrtonslsoorderedfUd have prohMced the Qty of San Frandsco ning di>c!fe#ninaskin on dbe basis of sextial ^anctt. The culture of IntoleranGe that lad to aradwoidqfrapercuartoos^riimti Mgtlh mittees bald heartafi In ^ on expandbig Lobster to Inidne a program of diversicy from uskigany VA-HUD funds to enforce the Qrienttttai. it ws approved by voters in this attack was nurtured by school commu­ Thfse ads givepeoplepanniBSlonto hace. tederal law «e Indude eamal orfentackw^ training fbr empbyees In aH its Cook Co. perc of itsand-^scrimlnatlon ordinance which i 993. and was sent \»9tck for reconsMera- nities that have categorkany Mmd ao edu­ Th^ are mdcdul vehides^ Tlwy have a gender ebd dMMtaf. and totocrease fsd - I II I fc aJ — - requires cicy cofitractors to offer domestic tion in 1996 skmt the Supreme Court cate students to respect aH people, ra^uti- real Impact on reat p«a(p4e's Hves.'' erat bMf pufcwijBHieni {uriadtetien. Test^ locanons. partnerxh^ beheflta to unmarried emptoy­ stroMidi down Colcnado's iiomopiiobic less of sexual orientation.^ mcK^ included that ofa heterosexual man AMiough IWnois does not have statewide Tha Ntfionai Gqr and Lesbfafi Task ees. bidi»ding gi^ and iesbian couples. Amendnr^Hvc 2 as unconstitutional. Beatrice Dohmt lefal director of the Force's Ex«cutihr« Dirsetor Karry Label who odd that he had been assumed to be gay dvi ri/fm procections. Cook County, The Hilleary amendment wouki have fro­ Issue 3 was heki conscicutional by the Lambda Lepl D«lanc« and Education Fund. nid. "nrbe de«rti of MactfMwr Shepttrd Is py and beaten so bed^ that he Is no longer wiiere Date fieV VMM harassed and ilred for zen spending on the Housing Opportunities Sbeth Circuit Court because it **merely said. "TT^is Univeralty of Wjmning student angle, but lc does noc have to be hi vain. able to work as an artttt. There has been beli^mf, is die only county^ the state thac • NATIONAL AND INTERNATIONAL NEWS for People Witii AIDS (HOPWA) program, removed munlcipeiiy enecced special prt>- was beaten and left to die. tied to a fanctt like We takm solac» In ihe tee ttac ivioat no actkHi since on the hate crimes bHL but bans and-giy discrimination in employment which helps people living with AIDS to find tections for gays and ." Henderson, 21, and Aaron James McKinney, an animal because he was hofMst and open Americuir are outmsed b)r tMs vidous on Oct. 8k die Senate passed an act aimed The 1993 ordinance also prt»hlblcs discriml­ housing, at fiscal year 1998 levels. Instead, Kerry LobeL executive director of the Matthew Shepard's age imconfirmed, have been cfia^ged wtdi about beinggay. Matthew Shepard*s hordbla and httiahd Mtack. Wb now^sk ihese at adding new languid to the Campus nacion based on smial orientadon in iious­ HOPWA funding will increase by $11 mil­ National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, first degree murder, iddiiappi'g »KS >S>^ suffering «Kf dwith cannoc he dismissed sim­ sme AmeHcansfid heip ussflBp the and* Security Act of 1992, whk:h ^dudes sexuai ing. public accomodations and credic trans­ death may lesid to lion, bringing the total funding to $215 mil- said, "...Tiie Supreme Court allowed equal­ vat)Bdrobbery,andarefo«ii3igheUcn$IOQ,000 ply as the fittilt of deranged, isolated mdhddu- oriencadon amongthe catsgories of people actions. The Cook County commission ruled on lk>n. ity to take a back seat to homopiiobia. It hate crinnes laws bait. Two University of Wyoming student. als. HisactackersarsamongmJilionsafAmeri­ dtac have been so prevafenc ihese pest protected from hate crimes in colleges and May 29 thac Red Lobster had violated the In July, tiie Hilleary amendment spon­ is unconscKMiable diat the Court would Gay Unh^rslty of Wyoming student Mat­ Chastity Vera Pasiey, 20, and Krist)en Leann cans who constantly hear the message that few months.^ We ask ^ Americans to universities. The IHotise passed the same ordinance wiien Halt was fired by its restau­ sored by Van Hilleary (R'^Tenn), passed the allow this ruling to stand and refuse to act thew Shepard died of his injuries on Oct. Price, were changed as accessories to the gay people are not worthy of the most bask support hate crimes legjlslaclon and to bill on Oct 7, and Preskient Qinton is rant in Lincoinwood, IlL The commisskxi said House by a vcite of 231-200, and the Riggs on i>ehalf of all Americans^" i 2. after being savagely beaten, bumed crime. equal treatment. By simply being oursehres spedc otic j^jainst the right v^ing's cam­ expecced to sign it Mto law. that tiie restaurant manager had repeatedly amendment sponsored by Rep. Fnvik Riggs The ruHng is not seen as impactir^ die and left for dead, spending 18 hours tied Wyoming has no hate crimes law, and and saying there's nothing wrotig with us paign to change gsy. lesbian, bisexuai, i-late crimes against gays, iesbians and ridiculed HaH and finally fU^ him because of (R-Calif) was passed by 214-21X House VA- Court's 1996 decisksn in Romer v. Evons to a fence outside Laramie, 30 mites from efforts to pass such l^isiadon have l>een because we are gay, we risk everything — transgender people." bisexuab comprise tiie third-highest cat­ his sexual orientation, and ordered the res­ HUD Subcommittee leader Rep. Louis Stokes di3t laws excluding lesbians and gays from Cheyenne. rqected on the grounds that It would give from our lives to our jobs or custody of our '^And^y rhetoricand antjr^xy violence egory of hate crimes reported to the FBI, taurant cNUn to reinstate Hall. At that point (D-Ohio), Rep. Jerry Lewis (R-Calif) and Rep. discrimination protection are unconstitu­ Shepard, 21. was fbund on Oct. 8 un» gays "special rights/' The Shepard murder children. The first step In ending this kind of currently representing 11.6 percent of ail go hand in hand," sakl Tracey Conaiy, the chain's owner, Darden Restaurants of Nancy Pelosi (D-CaliO were instrumental in tional. Justice John Paul Stevens wrote in conscious and with his skull smashed, as has brought increased calls for state and violence, which took Matthew's life. Is to et^d hate crimes reported. Current bw aik^ws communications director forthe NGLTF. Orlando. Fia., filed a request that the com­ diminating the Riggs amendment and in­ an unusual opinion that the Court's re­ well as with substantial bums and cuts, his nattonal hate crimes legislation to protect anti-gay discrimination and the hostility that only invesdgation and prosecutk>n of hate "Hate violence is a k^gicai excansk^n of mission dedare the ordinance unconstitu­ creasing HOPWA funding, while Minority fusal of cases like tiiJs one "reflects noth­ ^miily said. Shepard was said to "look like and lesbians from hate violence. It fosters." crimes l^sed on race, religion, national these rhetorical, le^ladve and electoral tional* A storm of publicity and protest fol> Leader Richard Gephardt (D-Mo), Sen. Bar­ ing more than a conclusion that a particu­ a scarecrow" because of his position on Wyoming State Rep. Mike Massie (D- Elizabeth Birch, executive director of the origin and cobr. attacks. VVhen and-gay rhetork: escalates, lowed, and after pressure from the Illinois bara Boxer (D-Calif), San Francisco Mayor lar case may not constitute an approprbite the wooden fence. He was taken to the Laramie) said, "Because of homophobic atti­ Human Rights Campaign, said, *T^iere is Preskient Clinton called the Shepard so does anti-gay violence. Hate crimes are Federation for Human Rights and others. Willie Brown and V/hite House staff were forum in which to decide a significant intensive care unit at Poudre Valley Hos­ tudes, every attempted bias crime bill so hr nothng special about living life frme of vio­ femily on Oct. 10 and issued a statement a result of that intolerance." Red Lobster dropped the challenge to the also involved in persuading conference mem­ issue." pital in Fort Collins, where he died with­ to t>e proposed in the state legislature has lence and nothing right about opposing laws denouncing the attack and calling fbr Con­ The NGLTF has documented a link ordinance in Jufy. The company still argued, bers to eliminate the amendments. Lambda Legal Defense and Education out regaining consciousness. Hehad been been blocked. The viciousncss ofthe attack that would help remedy this situation. Those gress to pass the federal Hate Crimes between increases in anti-gay violence however, that Hall was fired for "perfor­ Fund's Mkiwest Managing Attomey Patricia attacked twice recendy and told his friends on Matt cleariy shows how critical this kind who oppose hate crimes legislation are ei­ Prevention Act, -Human Ri^ts Campaign and escalation of anti-gay rhetoric during mance reasons." M. Logue said, *^lf the Court wanted to that he believed it was because of his of legislation is. The attack was fueled by the ther burying their heads in the sand or they -Human Rights Campaign, h4adonal Gay Ixillot initiacive campaigns aimed at pro­ Darden Restaurants also ow?is the Olive change Rtnner, it wouki have taken the openness about t>eing gay. kind of ignorance and intolerance that we as simply don't care that thousands ofgay and Suprenne Court hibiting gay rights laws. Just before and Lesbian Task Force. GLSEN, GLAAD Garden and Bahama Breeze chains. Shepard's friend Hauva Manookin com­ Americans must condemn in the strongest lesbian Americans are being harassed and case. The judges do not usually second- Colorado's homophobic An>endment 2 -M. Jane Taylor. The Washington Bhde declines to hear mented. "As devastated as we are by this terms possible." brutalized each year." guess federal appeals courts when they passed in 1992, Colorado activists docu­ Red Lobster violated construe local laws. But we're still disap­ tragedy, we know this embodies Matt's GLSEN (the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Joan M. Garry. GLAAD executive direc­ mented a 129 percent increase in assaults House passes Riggs Cincinnati gay case commitment to justice and human rights. pointed that the Hig^ Court did not de­ Education Network) issued a statement on tor, said, "We invite those who are so ob­ on gays. A lesbian and a gay man were employee's rights I hope that hate crimes legislation will be The Supreme Court refused on Oct 13 to part from this normal practice and put Oct. 12 expressing "profound regret" over sessed with the lives of lesbians and gay men killed in 1992 when their Oregon home Red Lobster restaurants has been found in Amendment 409* 14 passsed so that some sense can come hear a challenge to an anti-gay amendment Issue 3 to rest once and for all" Shepard's death. GLSEN Executive Director to examine che tone and tenor of their was ffrebomtMMJ during a ballot bacde. In violation of a g^y MYiployee's civil rights, The U.S. House of Representatives passed the from this tragedy." to Cincinnati's crty charter. -National Gay and Lesbian Task Force; Kevin Jennings said. "We hope this tragedy remarks weli before they issue them. Think Maine in 1995, incidents of anti-gay vio­ and must rehire him and pxy $95,000 in VA-HUD Appropriations Conference Com- Two men were arrested on Oct. 8 in The Court declined to consider Equality Lambda Legal Defense and Education Fund; serves as a wake-up call to the many school of who will hear their words. Think of who lence jumped to 10 within six months of back pay and damages to the employee, mittee report on Oct 6 by a vote of 409-14. connection with the attack. Russell Arthur Foundation of Greater Cincinnati v. Lisa Keen, The Washbtgtg>n Bhde wfio was fired in 1996. The report had dropped die anti-gay iUggi and Ondnnuti.thus allowing homophobic Issue 3 \

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' *• •-' • ;^K,^cT-.f ;^ j.„ -" JC: It fxsx felt lyce home. Thanhs wl^ the woman at the altar is so ]aiipc»taot-<^ because attend gay issues you see diat's a place whete thetc^s no dis- I think a lot of peo|^ Onciucl- ctinunation and thete^s openness and equality fbr everyone. Ing the ittocM»e) tliousto wo fonim at Corpus Christi terview; £C: Any commenta on die Biahop*a ban worahtppod Pathor Jim. But it Corpus Christi lesbian parishionets speak out ped at all times and meeting was like a pep rally. and sistets. So 1 was hurt for diem and I know sevendhundpedparisfaionegg. The speakers wete in sll sinuttions, but must be 'Weighed with By Susan Jofdan for sodal Justice* EC: Kay,your statement aboat die Meaa- diey'te stiU struggjUng now. The Bishop got off the Reveceod Robert Kennedy, theodog^ at pastoral pmdcnce if there is any danger of Kay Smith and Jeanne Chirico are a couple ing of letreta waa picked up by the kicai easy at the (Imag^ngJustice) conference when St. Bemaid*s Insdtuti^ Marie DeRossa smd shockix% the firithfuL" whose union was blessed by the Rev. Jim Callan mediae Was that animal bleaafaig done by a he got an ovation from die delegates, who Kathy Aheth, a couple blessed by Father Jim before hc was ousted from Corpus Christi Kermedy said tfaat ^thete are a ton of ques­ Catholic church, smd did thc Biahop re­ were mosdy from out of town and sec hira as Callan, who have been parishionets for six Chutch for blessii^ same sex unions, giving tions" fbr church and society about same sex spond to youf atetement? progressive. But it seems he's going back­ haa <^po«ed ahnoat stoce the bciSinalx^ years; Denise Donato, Family Minister for communion to non-Catholics, and allowing relationships, the nature of homosexuality^ the KS: I saw a picture in the paper ofthe animal wards. JC: I do beUeve the chtuch can change, but Corpus Cht^o, and Jeanne Chirico, half of the Macy Ramerman and other pastond as­ definition of marriage, etc., which the Church blessing service at another Rochestcr church. it requires dismandir^ the traditional silence. couple interviewed on thc pxevious page, who sistants to approach thc altar, wear a banner that EC: Axe you conaidering leaving thc has not reflected on. "'Blessing of same sex But all over the country on thc feast of St. SS: I agree. is a student of theology at St. Bernard's Insti­ resembles a priestly stole, and do other things churcfa, and if not» why ia it important for relationships is not even on the radar screen, Francis, Catholic churches have a blessing of JC: Vatican II was gping thete in thc *60s. It tute. traditionaliy forbidden to women and reserved you to stay? let alone coming in for a landing." Therefore animsJs. set the stage for acceptance of all peopie and for males by the hierarchy ofdie Catholic chutch. JC: I hope we're not talking about leaving Rev. Kennedy said that hc has spent 20. yeats the proper strat^y now is to address these JC: It wasn*t a question and answer thing. Carpus Christi. The ultimate goal would be to said that the d)utch should move with society. of ministry with the gay and lesbian commu* At a ineedtig of parishionets with Bishop questions and **taise up with clarity the nature People had one minute to expre&s their feel­ stay and continue to fight for reform in the Pope John XXIII said the church should open Matthli^ Clark in October, Kay said that she nity. After hearing about thc killing of Mat­ of same sex rclatiotiships." ings and in all we had only 30 minutes. church. But that's becoming less and less a the window and let a litde fresh air in. Matthew iShepard (as shown on TV news). A candlelight vigil observation was held In his had seen a news item about a local church's thew Shepard, he had dedded that he couid Bishop Qark's address in Match 1997 listed KS: He just gave a general comment that the possibility with each staff person removed. So I feel right now we have almost come to memory at Corpus Christi on Oct. 19, before the gay issues forum. service of blessing for animals. She said to the not attend the forum, because, as hc put it, several appropriate strategies, Kennedy said. evemng was like a pep rally and it didn't take the finish line and the consetvafives of the Bishop, "A ferret can be blessed, but I can't be The staff have made a statement that they're presenting the Church's position on gays would The first is to attend ro the work of Biblical hard work needs to be done in church and to say "maybe 1 can change who I am*' at a very much to get applause. He said hc didn't hear Vatican are putting out as much pressure as blessed." The Bishop had no comment. staying together on all the principles and val­ put him '*on the side ofthe violence." Hc said scholarship, without getting huc^ up on scrip- society before the church will consider same high cost in personal pain for everyone in­ anyone strugglitig with the issue of remaitiing ues of Corpus Christi. Thcy read the statement they can muster to stop us from reaching it. that he had finally dedded to attend not to The Empty Chset recendy spoke with Kay mral statements about homosexuality, but ad­ sex blessings *pastoraUy prudent."' He said volved); ("a very abusive a Catholic — which inflamed a lot of people, on Oct. 15 after thc news of Mary's firing. That's why it's so impottant to continue. When and Jeanne, about how thcy and other lesbian sigue a position, but to give infotnistion about dressing the complexities of research. that a prophetic call is being made at Corpus and unsuccessful treatment and very damag­ including me. One of the issues is that the KS: it's important to stay because of all the people asked Father Jim why he stayed in die and gay parishioners feel about the current such matters as how the church defines bless­ Second, to attend to the work ofthe human Christi, but there is a long road to follow ing to a person's understanding of themselves diocese says we're acting on our own, not as Catholics who don't go to church because church hc said it was like the dvil rights move­ state of thin^ at Corpus Chrisri. ing and matrifl^. and sodal sciences, '^ou and I know that before everyone catches up. as a child of God"), and ("a gift not part of thc church. He heard us bringing up they're divorced, or gay, or for one reason or ment in the South. When you saw discrimina­ £snpty Cloaet: What was your reaction to Kennedy said that the church has encour­ homosexuality is not an illness or a sin — but Marie DeRossa and Kathy Ahem spoke given to all; unless the gift is given it is not a issues of discrimination but he didn't hear us another are not accepted. A lot of people say, tion in the South, should you just move to the thc firing of Mary Ramerman this week? aged ministry to gays for thc past 20 years, but thc Church doesn't know that. We need to next about theit relationship, and about what choice.") discussing how we'd be part of '*a greater "I used to go to church.,." North or should you stay and try to change it? (Oct. 15). it is *• unevenly implctncnted and supported in bring it fors^ard," Kennedy said. Corpus Christi and their blessing ceretnony Donato said that the alternative Corpus corporate Catholic church." JC; Whether they want to admit it or not, the KS: I think a lot of people (including the Kay Smith: We thought this would be com­ practice." The need for such ministries is not Thitd, to attend to the stories of gay and have meant to them- Maric said that when they Christi prefers is lifelong commitment She JC: I told him I took great offense at his church's outward and visible signs of discrimi­ diocese) thought we worshipped Father Jim. ing; we weren't a bit surprised. But how it in question^ but the strategies employed are — lesbian people. Rev. Kennedy said, ^'We need first began attending the church, they werc said, "Longterm gay relationships are never comments, and that most of us had been nation affect the way society treats us. The way But it isn't about him, it's about the issues and happened was a surprise because she was ex­ including Corpus Christi's strategy of blessitig to hear their stories again and again.... A lot of skeptical; "Give it a month... Give it six suf^>orted or recognized. We have the respon­ struggling with remaining Catholic most of about social justice. Corpus Christi has always pecting to meet vnth Father McMuUin, the new they treat gay and lesbian people, women or months... Give it a year... This is pretty good, sibility to recognize and support the holy love our lives. I told him I'd been molested by a stood for social justice. priest. Charlotte Bruney and Kathleen Can­ anyone who's different. they're really accepting us for who we arc." of those who are comttutted." Donato also priest, left the Catholic church and came back JC: I think thafs why the diocese is so non, the diocese's interim co-administrators, EC: The church has lobbied every New Kathy said, "W^at was accepted about us refuted some of the typical arguments against to thc church because of Corpus Christi. I surprised at the amount of resistance. They made the decision- York State legislator, CathoUc or not^to get was the whole person. Not as the Church gay tnarriage. She ended by thanking the gay started seminary school because 1 thought thought they'd solve the problem by removing Jeanne Chirico: Mary thought there was them to vote against the state gay righta accepts us, as homosexuals who can't have sex and lesbian community for sharing their love, there was a place for me in the church, but I the leader, and when thcy came in and read us hope based on the issue of the banner (the bill. So although I*m not Catholic, the or be married. What we're asking is that they "which is very spedal. Gay coupies have been thought that was gone, thanks to backward- the rules we'd fall right in line. Instead of that, "stole"), and also she had already agreed not to church's position orx gays oppresses cnCt accept the whole being. Corpus Christi taught models of the strongest love I've ever experi- thinking Vatican groups. we're fighting even harder for sodal justice. participate in the Eucharistic prayer. But that and all New Yorkers. us that everyone is on the same plane. Father enced." She added, "By blessing unions we KS: I got tremendous support after I spoke. _. KS: Ifs like a fire. They morc thcy try to apparently wasn't rhe issue — it was het being KS: They give the green light that it's OK to Jim, Mar)' (Ramerman) and Enrique (Father give credibility to people who have been dowse us the hotter we get. on the aJtar at ali, and thar just feels deceitful Part of whar \ said that wasn't reported in the gay bash — ir's OK to hate. Fatherjim said the Cfldena) said that peopie who Jove each other stripped of dignity again and again.... (Accep­ JC; We can't speak for everyone. There are since we've been asking for eight weeks what Democrat c^" ChronicU was about my relation­ church needs to be thc headlights of society, and are committed deserve to be blessed. tance) takes time, but meanwhile children of was the issue, and her beii^ on the altar never ship with my partner and how close we are. not the taiiUghts—and it*s so true, llie church's sotne peo|^ who just want peace and fot **The ceremony wa.s the high ^\nt ofour God are being turned away, are committing came up. This meant a lot to me because we were one of job is to love unconditionally and treat human everything oo get back to normal. I have to say relationship. Wc got up in front of the commu­ suicide or bdng killed like Matthew Shepard... five couples who were blessed by Father Callan I do believe they're in the minority. KS:The banner represents a lot to the parish. beings equally. nity and God and said we were committed to Nothing can take away the pain already caused and Mary. And I told him that having that KS: Ifs Mkc family. Pcopk arc working day They said the banner was thc issue but it was EC: Can the chutch really change* espe­ each other... This experieoce gave u.s some­ or bring back the lives lost, but we can change blessing, how much closer to God we feel and and ni^t. As a patish we've become extremely really her participation. cially on these issues legafdingequvl tig^ta thing no church or anyone can take away from the future." how committed to service we are. I wasn't close. JC: \X^at's cleat is that the church is saying for gays and women — things the church us." Donato also received a standing ovation. going to shut up until everyone who wanted to that women have no place by the altar and Tlie couple received a standing ovation. The Jeanne Chirico then spoke briefly, thanking have a blessing had that opportunity. That's that's not something we can stand by and ac­ next speaker, Denise Donato, is the person the parishioners on behalf of herself and her when 1 mentioned seeing the blessing for the cept. who counsels both heterosexual and gay parmer Kay Smith for offering them sanctu- ferret. KS: What came from Maty herself is that it's couples who are preparing for marriage. She ary. "It is a safe haven where a gay person can Afterwards there was a standing ovation, ironic that Jesus came out of the body of a said, 'TThcte are questions about what hetero­ walk through and understand that everyone and it was mosdy by the heterosexual mem­ woman, and the first person to hold Christ after sexual legal marriage means to society, with may not understand their lifestyle... but ac­ bers standing and clap»ping. Hundreds of people At the Corpus ChHsti candteHght v^ he was born was a woman. But women aren't Kathy Mem and Marie DeRossa speak at one in two marriages ending in divorce...The cepts them as a loving child of God. Once agay came up to mc afterwards and 1 felt totally good enough to approach the altar. the gay Issues forum. church*s rok is to set a standard for marriage person walks out this door they have to put the embraced. One person who used to make bad JC: 1 think the church is scared ofthe power of lifelong commitment of fidelity." mask and armor back on... Thanks for your gay jokes never had anything good to say about of women and thc fact that we're starring to Donato said that five same sex couples so wiUingness to struggle and listen and love — I gay people until she came to Corpus Christi, claim that in the church. It's kind of the last far have been b2es.sed at Corpus Christi, but can't tcll you how much that means to us." The and she told mc she loved and accepted me. stronghold. that none of thc unions was performed in gathering responded again by standing and JC; Another woman came up to Kay and JEC: What was your reaction when Father church. "What are wc saying to gay and lesbian applauding^ embraced her and cried with her, and said, Callan wasn't allowed to hold Mass when couples when we dose thc church to them? A question and answer session followed. '^'e will not abandon vou." be vi^oa here recently? This has been a response to legitimate pastoral One woman asked Father Kennedy about the KS: Her husband was standing next to her S^r That was definitely a rage point. Thc needs and human rights for lesbian and gay double standard and why there are no conse­ and she was speaking for both of them. diocese says one thing and does another, Tlien persons. At Corpus Christi we set thc same quences for people in the church treating gays JC; She said, "If you go, we go." She was they say we have to trust them and move standatds fbt uniotis as for marriages. We and lesbians badly. Kennedy replied, **! don't speaking about the gay community. forward. haven't blessed all same sex couples OR mar­ know. When there is injustice or violence we EC: How do you see the future for Cor­ The parish received a letter from Cannon ried ail heterosexual couples who have ap- should rise up. Where are the churches' voices pus Christi and its gay parishioners? and Bruney in which they said it was Father l^d. The process is the same — dght months about the violence of Matthew Shepard's JC: I See us not separately as gay parishio­ Callan's decision not to give Mass- But hc was ptparation whete the couple is matched with death?** r ners but as part ofthe parish. There are abjt^ays i in tears when he told the congr^adon about a sponsor couple." Another question for Father Kermedy was, individuals who have to follow their con­ this at thc Cotpus Chrisri Foundarion Gala on Donato listed some of the few altematives "How can you continue as a priest to stand in 4 sciences and may not stick it out, but the Oct. 6, available to gay and lesbian people, including conscience to uphold teachings that discrimi- majority of parishioners will move as a unit in JC: It might have been his choice not to sutdde (one third of all teen suicides ate gay- nate?" He answered* "I stay with the church whatever direcrion the spirit takes us. come because he didn't want to get suspended, related^ and due to **the hopelessness young because wc have a aacramental imagination, KS: 1 expect there will be a lot of protest. I bttt I dkin't believe for a second that the diocese people feeL. as a nssult of sodety's and the which means duit because of the centrality of built a cross out of wood and we have a banner had dodiing to do with it. chu»ch*« beliclEs'7; pcemiscuity (chosen by die saciameots tn our lives dieie is.,e)ways a which is a half stole that Mary wore. She wore : EO What ugh a oppaahesexpattiier(aDodicrwayiDhtdeaiid dw chutch ss tiyii^ to upho&d." tude in regards to our parish. He said that the ftiend. < ^..

^ RADKO ^ MIA" POLONAISE to andffier great Image Out! /"'^^ OLDWORLD' WHITEHURST Matthew^ Shepard's OVER 3000 TO CHOOSE m^OM I RmmDANDNEWI But now death was caused by hate i, ORIGINAL SAISTTAS BY RICHARD Where do I find quality Statement of Kim L Mills, Education Di­ ity," these ads prodaim that lesbisns wad gays A^a^lQUE MUSIC BOX MELODIES rector, Human Rights Campaign^ at apcese are defective, that being gay is a bad thing that KRINKLE KLAUSE what?! ii' conference in Ft. Collins, Colo, on Oct. 10 we can and should chsu^. Gay and Lesbian Films Hie savage beatitig and buming of Matthew Because these messengers are wohres irt TEDDY BEARS Shepaid did not occur in a vacutim. 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And I am here to I BlOCKEASrOF COUKTHOUSE SQUARE These groups include Focus on the Family say we need a federal law to help protect all THE Upstate New York's Americans from hate crimes based on sexual OPEN SAT & SUN 11 TO 5 and its f>olitical offshoot, the Family Research Cards, G*^^» Council; the Christian Coalition; Coral Ridge orientation — real or perceived. largest and finest video Ministries; and a host of others. There is no hare crimes law in Wyotning. Videos Make no mistake; this campaign against gay And while I hope the people who tried to kill rental collection! people is not ahout religion or redemption or Matthew Shq>ard are puitished to the full any of those other "spiritual" terms they might extent ofthe law, the law in this case is insuffi­ 728 South Avenue • 242-7840 use in their advertising or public relations. cient. Not otdy can they not face additional co; Mon.-Sat. ]0am-9pm. Sun. 12noon-6pnni They are \oo\dt\g for wedge issues that will punishment because this was, in my view^ a help them elect more staunch religious politi­ , they also face no federal penalty— cal conservatives at ail levels of government. If unlike people who commit hate crimes based this were truly a religious campaign, why did on race, religion, national origin or disability. these men and women go to Capitol Hill last Hare crimes based on sexual orientation are spring and meet with the Republican leaders of the third-highest category of all hate crimes the House and Senate? Why did they threaten reported to the FBI, holding steady around 11 our national leaders with a loss of support if percent a year. they refused to follow the ultra-conservative There is a bill in Congress now called the religious political agenda? Hate Crimes Prevention Act. It would give the And they were successful. Shordy after their federal government the power to investigate meeting on Capitol Hill, Senate Majority Leader crimes such as the one committed against Therapy groups availaUt fbn Trent Lott went on television to say gay people Matthew Shepard. Until and unless that passes, are sinners and that we are sick He likened us they cannot intervene. We need this law. to alcoholics, sex addicts and kleptomaniacs. Finally, let me close by noting that tomor­ Just this week, in Washington, D.C, these row is National Day—the day same religious political activistgroups unveiled when the Human Rights Campaign urges all a television advertising campaign purporting lesbian and gay people to be open about our­ Lesbian/Bisexual Women to offer people "a way out of homosexuality" selves and here is the terrifying story of a Facilitated by Tansy Deut$^li, Psy.D. through prayer. This comes on the heels of a young man who tried to live an openly gay life, national newspaper print advertising campaign only to suffer the most horrific of conse­ 723-7750 ext. 37iS€ with the same message. They have already quences. Matthew Shepard tried to live that spent half a million dollars. We should ail fear example, and now he has become ^n example ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• to learn how much more they are willing ro of how dangerous it stiil is to be a lesbian orgay spend because — as you in Colorado well person in America at the tum of this century. know — thdr pockets are deep. I hope and pray thst this example will not drive The resulisi of campaigns like this are terrify­ gay people back into thc shadows—where thc Gay/Bisexual Men ing. The ultimare victims of their message are religious rightwould prefer we live. Rather, he people like Marrhew Shepard, people who shoidd become a clarion call to every fair- Facilitated by Jim Meyer, Ph.D. happen ro step into the paths of individuals minded person in this nation to stop this 723-7750 ext. 3154 who are swayed by the messages of such ads climate of hate, to stamp out anti-gay bigotry and by the climate of intolerance that they are wherever thcy sec it. fostering. Wearing the doak of "Christian char­ Cdl» Apt& Bidtr. (7l6)€S4-7709 Both will be ofFered at Park Ridge Mental Health Center -) MOMENT'S 15^1 Long Pond Road. rmwniMf raiMis MO maai ti UHHM WM wfs NOTICE ^Rocii—f r, NY in IW InMf nFNiniQHI last Sunday or ths nKMilh al ttia Frfsada MssMwg Houss, V- ''m 4t Road (naar ths comar or Cssl Avamis) For Miomiatfon eaN: 71«.234«1MI ^S^iitxHeatthSjscein 'i^JkMBftJ ^^•

TS^^ 'tj't.—a-'—• cS %^^ 1. *^ To speak of churches m if tha» veee one f^^ Lattars condnuad from p. 2 why corporations are slashing wages and |ob& Unitarian church, in this case aUows the tnore consetva- Local rwwi contiraNMl from p. 3 PHde Agenda to underwrite the expenses of in this countiy and moving their operations to Presbyterian Church. She is the author of ina cooapany's non-disctimination policy, of­ tive VMWpOUW-SDSpCMKiVFiWWIIv*^ EBaH actions, and the Prkje Agenda has First gay Christian sweatshops in what they label the "develofMng Universaliats Lswe Between Wotnerv Early Chrlsikm Re- fer domestic partner benefits, sponsor events RGStE awards grant reserved space in the Capital/legislative com­ world" (development for whom.^), where they Happily, there are churches througout seminar at Lake Ave* ^ionse* to femak Homoerotidsm. irt the GLBT conimunity, contribute to our same sex unioiw plex for possible EBaH actlvties there in hire children and young pec^?le, mostly women, Rochester that \miprtfy defy the laws set by otganizations and buy ads in our publications? to AijDS Rochester March. and force them to work 12- to 18-hout shifb To tbe Editon their denominations in the bope of bzingitig draws over 70 pecipie The answer is yes — if all we're interested in as Roch«snr GMnHd Eleccrk; has granted AIDS for a dollar a day, then «ell the goods back to The editovidiiti ^ OctJobetisacHtof j:&r.^iR^ about future change fot gays «3d lesbians. A N.Y. Steerir^ Committee is currently RATFA conference individuals and as a community is a slick PR RodiMlir jBSpbOjjO^tD fond renovations and By Carol D. Washburn us in the United States at 500 percent profit. Chter «aid, *^e aie tokl by tiie chutdi that Hiere is also the Unitaiian Universalist de- being Offsnlzed, with the goal of makif^ ft as cAnpa^n fiom a cotporation that's been owned fornisMngi^'ft^iKi Cti«nt Acthflty Room. Over 70 gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, to focus on HIV*s We need to ask why coiporations, inchiding straight people aie zequired to remain celibate nmnination that bpei^y perfonns ceremcMiies diverse as possMe. The Committee vrM be a fiom the beginning by extreme dght-wing The ipece llf^ecRy needed and will be and heterosexual people attended a Chris­ Coors, are allowed to dump millions of tons of otits^ of tnattiage, so ^ys afe not being asked of commitment fot same sex rektionslups. soimding board, will be accessible to ntedla, impact on African homophobes and racists and is still fiinneling ucHized for a myriad of actMties that are tian Faith and Gay Spirituality semkiar the toxic chemicals into our air, water and soil, for anything special when toid they must not act Our churches actively work SEnrard buikfii^ a WiH promote the planned «wi«s» and will our money to thc vety forces that oppose our oiilcai to che physicil »id mental well-being evening of Oct. 18 at Lake Avenue Bapdst espedaliy in areas where the poor and people on sexuai feelings. This ignores the tiny detail sodety whete gays, lesbians, bisexuai and bring as many people as possible \mo the Americans^ Latinos human tights and liberadon. of HIV poskhNi people and their %n{ltes. Church. of color live, and ate never held accounuble that straight peopte can marry, while when gays ttansgendeted petsons receive fuH tights. process. Some issues the group wili focus on In asking whether we in the gay, lesbian, Such ecevidetrwffi Indude edticMional semi- Folfowing the Invocation by Rev. Peter J. B. The Rochester Area Task Force on AIDS for the cancers and other iUnesses and deaths ask for dvil maniage dghts we tfe told th^ iiMiit ctyctrches, with or wtdmut the Uessing include ageism, youth, dh^etslty, marriage, ^ bisexual and transgetider community are go­ nars on topics st«ch as Hfo savlr^ medication Carman, a moment of silence to remember (RATFA) wili hoki Its fifdi Rays of Hope that result, nor for the degradation of the would be an 'abomination*^ of dM*£r rfttiotninations, have accepted that all people of cofor, sexual liberation, people of ing to set our standanJs so high that we hold regimens, work rauUness, support groups, Matthew Shepard, and a hymn, a brief word conference on Nov. 13 at the Four Points entire planet. just as humanity offers a spectrum of diver­ peo|$ledeserve a place in a wekotning commu­ lafth. and health care. companies responsible fbr the actions, contii- parentingi nutrition and food safety. The new was given by sponsoring institutions' repre» Sheraton Hotel located at 120 E Main St. sity with regards to skin cc4oi,cuitiiffCy or sexual nity whete they can go to be a£fitmed for who Some of the goals of the EBaH actions wlH butions and beliefs of a few individual stock­ I agree with Ms. Cheney that there is a room wii! afeo be utilized for group meals and sentatives: Dr. Darrell Lance from the Diver­ from 9 a.m. co 4:30 p.m. orientation, so there is tremcndobs diversity they are^ and to be given inspiration for the be to put a human face on thegaycommunity holders, Ms. Cheney ignores what I said in my minimum level of acceptable behavior thatwe sockHzation whh others who are able to sity Committee of Lake Avenue Baptist The conference will consist of workshops among churches and denominations concetn- isstttes of their lives. Wc*re ready for more and combat n^stive stereotypes; co buikl onginal article, that the majority of stock re­ must demand of eveiy company. I disagree Church, Leigh Ehresman from the More and speakers focusing on the impact of HIV/ ing beliefs, espedaliy on the issue of gay and support each other In facing the stigma hav­ progressive alliances and coalitions; to heip ' •,- churches td ioin us! mains in the hands of Coors family members, with her that it's impossible to avoid buying a ing HIV bears. Ught Committee of Downtov^ United Pres­ AIDS in the African American and Latino lesbian rights.There certainly are manychutches youth facing harassment and internalized ho­ who use their profits to fund right-wing ex­ company's products if we dislike the opinions Rev. Elixsbetfa O^^Shaug^esay Bsnka, byterian Church, and Rev. Peter J. B. Carman communities in the Rochester reg^otu Every­ who do not support the rights of gays and The room is beir^dedlcated to the memory mophobia; to strengthen local organizations; and donations ofeach of its stockholders. We minister of The Fust Uoivetaatist Church for the The Women and Gender Program, one is welcome, and encouraged to atcend. tremist organizations. of Mario Sitvestrone who spent hfs profes­ to educate legislators about their gay have many aitematives to consuming corpo­ lesbians, including the right for same sex mar- of downtown Rocxhetter. Colgate Rochester Divinity SchooL More to the point, we as bisexuals, lesbians, sional career vyfth RG&E and retired as contituents' needs; to make gay families vis­ Communities of color have been rate-made junk, from buying food directiy riages, but not all churches ate of tiiis opinion. trans people and gay men are whole human Senior Vice President in 1988. Marto was the ible; to encourage LGBT people to register The guest speaker. Dr. David L Bartiett, disproportionally affected by HIV/AIDS. from farmers at the Rochester Public Market currently serves at Yale Divinity School as beings, and many of us are interested in dis­ father ofAIDS Rochester's Executive Direc­ to vote. Nearly 70 percent of the women infected once or twice a week, eating at the local les- Lantz Professor of preaching and communi­ with AIDS in this region are Black or His­ mantling the entire structure of oppression tor Paula Sihrestrone. who reflected, "tt is The Oct. 3 meeting produced many sug­ bian-feminist'owned cafe and drinking your cation and associate dean of academic affeirs. panic. Fifty-six percent of all new AfiDS cases that divides human beings and destroys the heartwarming that Rochester Gas and Elec­ gestions for potential actions, such as a call- local microbrew, to purchasing clothing and Upon openinghisaddress/'Readingthe Bible: reported in the nine-county Finger Lakes earth, rather than in grabbing our minuscule tric has chosen to have an impact on two of in day to legislators, as well as letter writing fumiture at garage sales, direcdy from local From Pain to Promise/* he started with, "It region during 1997 affected people of cofor, share of the corporate pic. Yes, I'm a queer the most meaningfol aspects of my iife - my and personal visits; PSA messages; billboards; artisans or through catalogs of goods made by yras the best of times, it was the worst of yet, these communities represent only 12 activist, but for the last 22 years I've been an father and AIDS Rochester's clients.*' slogan contests; teach-ins; newspaper ads members of artists' collectives in other coun­ times..." He encouraged everyone to read percent of the population. With infection activist in many other areas, and before I even placed in a cross-section of media oudets; started coming out ofthe closet I realized it's tries. che Bible wfthin its context looking at the rates continuing to rise, particularly among W ant a date? Equality Begins at house parties to educate; buttons/T-shirts; itnpossible to do any serious work for change And those of us with disjx>sable income can main theme which is love, and considering women and adolescents, the need for HIV/ letters to the editors of local papers/TV without asking pointed questions about power take some ofthe money we spend on rainbow that these are real people at specific times in AIDS education and prevention is tnore im­ Home broadens base stations; organized radio call-in; web sites; in this system and who benefits from wielding baubles made in China and donate it to the history. portant than ever. With more peopfe being Equality Begins at Home (EBaH) fs a series of local proclamations; social and economic It. Gay Alliance, which like most nonprofit otga­ Dr. Bardett referred to **painfol scrip­ affected, the community needs to focus on actions around New York State and across justice theme day; mail info to health care nizations struggles financially and goes beg­ tures" (Leviticus 18:22 and Leviticus 20:13) the resources that can not only prevent the We a/ineed to hold corporations and every­ die country, planned for next March with the providers; national day of silence; public dis­ ging to corporations like Coors for funding. concerning a man lying with a man as with a spread of HtV, but support those affiacted/ one connected with them — stockholders, hope that it will bringvisibijity to LBGT issues plays of affection (PDAs); senior/youth state­ Isn't it time we supported our own people? woman, an abomination and punishable by infected by AIDS to be empowered to live CEOs, and consumers — accountable for all and communities on the state level* where wide tour of photos, and much more. And isn't it time we stopped givitig our money death, and Romans chapter one, referring to with hope. of their actions. We need to ask why corpora­ the religious H^t is active with its anti-gay If you have ideas, or would like co get to Coors, a cotporation with a long histoty of che same; however, reminding us thac Paul The conference will open with remarks by rions are firing their employees after years of ballot inftjatives and other assaults on gay invohred in any way, contact Alana R. Samucb, racist, sexist, homophobic, anti-labor and other was a firsc century person dealing with first Mayor William Johnson and Councilwoman loyal service and hiring them back as part-time Americans. (212)627-0305; fex (212)627-4136; e-mail and temporary workers so the cotnpanies can idtra-right behavior? cencury issues and first cencury rules not Gladys Santiago. Ednita M, Wright, Ph.D.. of The first planning meeting for EBaH New Send2Alana@aotxom. Or you can write her pay lower wages and eiitninate benefits, while We as lesbian, giy, bi and trans folk need to really pertaining to homosexuality. Syracuse Universtty will deliver the keynote York took place on Oct. 3 in Albany. The care of the Empire State Pride Agenda. 47 the heads of these corporations are tnaking stop feeding the maw that bites us, and all of From diere. Dr. Bartiett referred to "pow- address. Dr. Wright's research has focused National Gay and Lesbian Task Force has Hudson Ave.. New Yoric NY 10014. millions everv'vear in salary and stock options. us, whatever our sexual and affectional orien-, committed a $5000 grant to the Empire State erfol. promising scriptures" in Mark 7:24-30, on the coping strategies of African American Vi'e should ask why millions of p>eopie in rhe tations, have to a.sk ourselves ^v'^hac is most Acts 10:1-33. and the book of Gaiatians. He ivomen living w^ich AIDS, and spiritualty in U.S*, whatever their sexual orientations and important; convenience, or concern for the points ouc that God*s grace and love are fer social work practice. The day long confer­ family situations, now have to work more than survival of the planet and our thriving as greater than ever before known and that we ence wifl include workshops, lunch, perspec­ one job just to keep themselves and their loved humans? An easy beer, an easy buck — or our are noc co condemn those thac are clean in tives from a group of panelists fiving with ones fed and clothed. integrity? Let's take a look at thc larger picture. Key West Bennet Party God's eyes. We are to feithfotly love God and HfV/AIDS. and closing reflections by Ms. Speaking of clothings we aiso need to ask •f others. Salted wfch personal expenences, Betcy Tyson, who worked with HIV positive Dr Bartletc's calk was upllfdng and encourag­ inmates whife in prison. ing. He closed by receiving questions and The public is invited to attend. A limited The Bay Sfreef commencs from the audience. number of scholarships are available for $«iias Point, HBW i^tk The next seminar in this series will be held people Ihfing with HIV/AIDS. To register or Friday, November 20 Friday, April 16. Dr. Bemadetxe Brooten of to obtain more information, please call Kathie RANDY &. RAETZ, PPS Pierce at (716)461-3520. Geva Theatre (MS) 483-2233 Brandets University will speak at Downtown General DentieCTij fm ihe e&tiM funih] jiwshHing bleecbfaftg ft comnetiem 7:00 pm - 9:cx) pm Evtrytnal Cruft t btniiH f^r the Meitiaf 2104 & Henrietta Itoea BMtlit hr AIDS R«eli«sttr Kodheeter, NY 14623 Sat«r4ay, NMember 7, !99S g

Bring Friendl 5 Admission Dimitr btfiAs at ^. '-^A,: n c-> a HI f h'^ n n f i f f A n ^^ (^N I I ' n c^ -f f-' s ^' n A. S:00 r.M. in6}334-g3SO SliiMr D«ii«ti«ii—$2S.OO r New Patietirte weleome l^l^POP Series AoenMi~a«y *9i all by presents 'iS- Cirening and Saturday ^ppte. available «^^rteiatf4 ^rP The Legendary Barbmu Cook BC/BC im ticifeHng fvt^eUm Celebrate FaU with a new look! Our office Ig located 0onvwiiapttat>ierRtS9O,iiigt»ufc CmBHarmnMftpakiibnmAto6m^\ Misie by: >-^ EaAtmmThtatrtt -V . > ' -/-•' .^^^ Free ptMHtingivi the Easi End €lamge •«yt vitii Oltf Mf DiscomUsayaibii^kfsUtdmts A senior citiwtM. dbsif ns in eyewear «. M(78»*taM| 232^MM§ HH ffMit ft M9 I^Miwfttr ^nt^HHJ^M4:^i^^ the^

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^00^ an^ www.netaicciiet/~4ani^dex.html Annual Turk^ RafSe phone 232-4719 SiBBdey November ISth Spm - 9pm Free home beked turioey aendwiches Gravy and crasberry seoce StO^HB^f Door prizes every 1/2 hour & drink specials Rirfge Road station AIDS Ibodiesler. The Nov. Entertamment is "tlie" pbce fiiat n \ Chfistoplier Radko has display on a ^orioos 16- Fri 6th Skeeter conunitted tt> ckmaiiog it-tall Christinas tfce. Be S«t7th BobDietch Rocbester Historical over 1200 cffnaments i^an sQ£e to visit Rk^ Soad Fri 13th Bob Dietch his own afdiives to a Station today and potcfaase Sat 14th Bob Dietch Society Bovriing League cfaafity faffle that will a Radko Raffle! Fall Specials benefit- }t:.i d ku' K ^t I tic" S u ui n j .1 r"\ t6l31 Siiige BiMttt I Pfoti. &Dec W*aitaU.ltH) BemwK * Boy a $$.00 Raffle Ticket * Have a chance to WIN 100- Holley, err 1447t> Mvm.-fri, 12-9PU Qitistxqiher EMUEO Oroaments • Tbere wffl bc 12 total winnefs Thursday Spm-lam Utt. S Smn. t2*5P Monday 8pm-2am • All pfocecds benefit AIDS Rochester • Drawingi hdd 12/23/98 two for one Labatts SLOO off all Canadian beer www.ridgenxKistation com Tuesday Friday 4pm-6pm Shop Around Tke Wortd in Just One Dayr^* Over 22,000 tqmare feet of fwn! Special CofTee Drinics SLOO w^ & domestic Good Luck in your 1999 season. Wednesday 9pm-lam Sunday 4pm- 10pm Weicome BACK two for one well & domestic Sl,^ Buds & well shots ^^^•^%#%gv^

THE

60 Browns Race - 262-2700

^p. Overlooking the High Fails Gorge Across from Kodak on State Street Please check Frontier Field events special tiours

Open AH Year Lunch Mon.HFri. 11:30 a.m. - 2 p.m. Dtnner Moii.-Thurs. 5 -10 pm Fn&Sat. 5-11 pm

lAi. STREET Reservations Recommended • Gift Certifioates Always AvaUable WXXI mPMNQ OAAAOE

SIWiaTHBET LorrsMostwM 2. PBgM onio PIM Street I 3. ftighl onto Bnmne flaoe 4. FoNonf cobMoetona driM S. PaiWng is avahbla in the pnfMtifl gamge or after 4 p.m. on tfie left, just paetthe bujkfctg. Free paridng afiar 4 p.m. The Eaay Rider shuttle slope dbnctiy at our doorf \^ .-•- '^-* s^ xji^s^:!^ AI4 9^up rr ctosjK

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"',v •r'jtiK* ^5J&W^-K^-i Hie Gi^y Vouch Group took part in a Ropes Course given by Rush 34. I DINING FOR DOLLARS: Tom Crane and Kathy D'Eufemia on Oct. 3 at John Paris g Dining for Dollars XIII pre-gala party at his historic home on East Avenue^ .'.i.,:^

IHA^tBOUT CLOSIN6 MMmr: Above airfhri^ fi^ht ^ili ^ biMiieOyec^r 41 Lesbim

The post-party ^la was held at Village Gate Square, where thc original Dining for Dottars event was held in 1986. sponsored by Helping People with AIDS Inc.

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' .1 L > ft wHb the rest ^ the gw commvMl^r'lM, Wt HalhMb Ways toBeing Gay Check it out Empqf »»ci^^ ftiglinlit^ eweins aad s^:lia Rooscvcit's correspondance with the &«N^ Clesilt. 179 Atkhtfc Ave, Rochester* NY 14609"* I2S5. Or caft 244*90^ Locena Hickok.

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r^-^y/^A Miss Gay 'V.^fcvyji?^ Rochester Men*s Chorus pageant is Nov. 8 releases first CD The 28th annual Miss Gay Rochester After thtcc years of inteiashR^; j^r, Pageant will be presented by MLTV thc RochesterO^ &fe0'$ (%pi%is is Productions on Nov. 8 at the Harro releasing tfacif first sdbum, Vbk^Jritfrt East Ballroom. 155 Chestnut St. tht Htart. Doors wiil open at 6 p.m., and Conducted by veteran Music Di­ showtime is 7:30. Thc pageant will star rector Nick WilHams, \^mt9s pre­ Miss Gay Rochester 1998, Ladyjane; sents an overview of the chorus's Aggy Dune (hostess for the evening); history from thc tiny five-man group Bernadettc celebrating her 20th anni­ thcy began as in 1982, to thc 60-piua versary, and Heather Sky and Ambro­ membership thcy enjoy today. sia Sakd. "It takes everyone to make this Tickets are $15 in advance and S20 happen," says Williams, ^Therc is at thc door, and arc avaiiabie at Club never one voice more important than Marcella, Tara and Muthers. For ticket another." That statement serves as and table information, call Liza at 263- die theme for the album as well as 7727. the chorus. WUIe Vokts indudes sot^ from ^'Straight from Peel Svnott end the ^Mnon* Broad­ way duo of Ro^jgers and the Hearf liESLbS- HammetMciti, tKe cliorus also chose aired Hov. 5 fn to include tnavic &oni ksser-kpown composers Mimi Farina, Sally Canandaigua Bngcsett» and Ysaye Ban^wclL "'Each Strait Frttttt At Heart, an Academy song fdls pan of the story ofbeing a Award nominated video, will be the gay nian« without stexeotyping that feature of an evening of dialogue for cxpedcoce for anyone/* explains parents, families and fnends oflesbi­ IRSt CO.. Williams* ans and gay men at the Unitatian Uni­ The chonia worked eiuensiveiy versalist Church of Canandaigua. with W3Qa. Rochester's Public Sponsored bythe Interweave Com­ BioadqtttingSeaiioo, to ptoduce the mittee of tfut church, the event is ^bunk Sta fccots&g; sessions we«e scheduled for Nov. 5 at 7 p.m. at the heki et ^Cfanfcb o€ St. Pesei end church. Members of the -Rochester St. Paet on Wm Ma^ St. chapter of Parents, Families and

i \. ^ .'.V I *^^e wonSd Ketieatse the music, Friends of Lesbians and Gays pcffooe In concert, then call every­ (PFLAG) will be part of a panel dis­ one back: to tecoid at the chutch.** cussion following the 20-minute recounted the Muak Ditectoc; Be- , video. The event is free and open to tween sessioos ^O^Gams was ajkled the public. by WXXI fecbtdtngand sound engi­ PFLAG promotes the hedth and neer David Shibetaki to balance the well-being ofgay, lesbian and bisexud persons, their families and fnends Vorci-^ ^-Rf >vi jux meHer-tapm osed n^An^ final ver- through support, education and ad­ statt. vocacy. The organization provides an *1lus xecotdiQ^ ii^tescitts tfaje opportunity for didc^ue about sexud h^^seat kvc! of chond pcffotmance, onentation, and wotks to create a and moved each of us to a higher sodety that is hedthy and respectful piateau of musical excellence," te- The festival wifi. indude films, leadings, Crystal Ball set fbr of human dignity. Thc PFLAG poffts|ofan Owen, a IS-year sing;if^ perfbtmiaice, videos, art openii^, and n>oie, Helpline is 716/234-1056. snember of the choms. at various sites In EulXklo. (Sec oJendar, page transgender people The Unitarian Universalist Church Vmtufiem ^ Hmi is avaSdrie BIS, fbr ftiB lisd«« «^ eventi). of Canandaigua is located on 3024 Decetnber of t998en both cassette AmoQg the ntost wdl-known ^utes takifkg of the Southern Tier Cooley Road, ofTRt. 5 dc 20, just west cape and conqMict disk. Copies ate patt thb yen axe audior David Sedatb (Nov. Ihe fitst annual Ciystal Ball will take place on of Canandaigua. Call thc church at available Adnrefi Hdl on Dec. 1» at 7 pjn. ttansgender suppott gtoup. Road has been dosed. Allow time to OdMv hi^^l^ indude an evening of vid­ Cocktails will be served at 7 pan., followed follow the detour. eo^ ^ abofigiml artists, prasenced by Zachazy by dinner at 8^ and dancing. Dtess is formd. The Unitarian Universalist Church Imti^bOy on Nov. 14 at HaUwaOs at 8 pjn., Motd rooms are $64.95-$84.95 under STG. of Canandaigua promotes the inher­ -*" .•> pli^ gaiy arts festivail aodasnydaeadtogof^4a£ipaAaws^/ja^ To RSVP e-mail [email protected], or ent worth and dignity of every per­ 'iltoliia^^iMei|Si''attd 4Niie"AiMMM»''oa'' wnte PO Box 533, Hotseheads NY 14845, or son, ptovidisig a place of acceptance adl 1-800-756-1339 and leaipe a mess^; enter of one anodter and encouragement to totjeitBe jf^imadpn^ caB HaBMb at 1116 9516 6245 and follow instructions. Res- spintud growth. Regular worshipser- vat meii 1sct^, f thtough tfec 4 (tt6J835-73i53L ervadotis shoukl bc made by Nov. 20. vices are hdd each Sunday at 10 a.m.

^ ff " \^ > ""K^iz-i^: Erin Wia«r continuod from p* Bl jtmtttmaxkidattttmhir^qmsHttes. DUawyttftbtttt Great work if you can get iti I do think it ttUrrKtyoMittpar^mkf^ sometimes over-professionalizes things and Yes. A iesbian youth asked if being out and creates "career activists/* and this takes its bdng a good person was advocacy, enot:^ ot toll on the actud pasdon and emotion of was she tequired by virtue of her sexud onen­ activism. But thete's reaUy no other way to go tadon to do mote. That question seemed to about doing it Activism \^ such demanding puU at a few people. One person on the pand work that you can't espect someotie to sup­ went as far as implying that youths didn't have port him or hetsdf on volunteerii^. "Career enough eiq^edence to do significant work. I Activism" is a necessary evil. certainly disagteed with that. Gn the whole, What anjttm-fkht^ dbostt ttfbat hi^tptntd in people were torn between whedier it's more Lartttieie, Wjtctttittgear&erdtisttfeek? uafiid to the cause to be aggresstvdy out and Ift heanhxeakif^. The news of (Matthew vocal, or quiet and subde. Shepard's) death stnick me with a red force. What strikes me more, however, is the way %ttttds Uke the oUAssimilafionisttt verses A^^s- communities have organized and come to­ mkAftmsm debate ttt tm. When dttytttt s«eyotirse^ gether over this issue. I'm cautious of the ih{usic^(gtm&*B^*Btttporitittt Fm mote ofa chameleon. I Hke to adjust my manyring of anyone for any reason, but the behavior to die individud situation. I don't fact remdns: people are organising and speak­ feel any one philosophy will carry me through ing out about the issue. all situations. Eleanor Rooseveft (left) with Lorena Hicfcokffnactting wdMsher s before Dojtoti haw any career^ials^ People hope created web-pages fbr Matt Shepard leaving for the Caribbean in March 1934. Vm not sute yet. At 20,1 can safely sa^J'm andbtidalotofcandk'UgbtviQls, What tttore doyou burnt out from aU the acdvism IVe done. I think should be done in response to the tra^efy? Empty without you 170 East Ave, 325-6490* Music Line 325-5880 didn't go away to college when I graduated I think we should be focusing more on the high school. Instead^ I worked at a 7-11. Now crime itself and not on the individual as much. I w^ould like to think people realize "Hick, my dearest, I cannot go to bed to-night under scd until 1978, 16 years after Fve moved back home to my parents' house - without a word to you. I feel a littie as though a Roosevelt's death and 10 years after Milestones proudly presents - which is weird — and am living off savings that happens everywhere. Mact Shepard's stoty is just an example. partof me was leaving to-night, you have grown Hickok's. As soon as the letters became until I can decide what I want to do. I am» so tnuch to be a part of my Ufe that it is empcy available, scholars began denying that Matt mas 21. Doyou consider him ayouth? however, interested in possibly getting an edu­ without you even though Tin busy every minute. there was a physical relationship between Many consider anyone under 24 to be a A Woman's Voice... Jonatha Brooke &the cation in sociology for obvious reasons. These are strange days & ver\' odd to me, but TU the two women. Others, like biographer youth. What are they? remember the joys & tr\- to plan pleasant things Blanche Weisen Cook, said otherwise. Youth is such a subjective temty however. Tm intrigued by the human dynamic, par­ & count the days between our times to-^gether." Now readers can judge for themselves. Story Yes, it is. Tm 20 and yet I feel burnt out. ticularly in group situations. Pm interested in The letters of Eleanor Roosevelt and Asso­ Empty Without You, ed. Roger / often hear oldergtrys and lesbians say they've November 14 @ Spm how people organize and why. ciated Press reporter Lorena J-lickok have now^ Streitmatter, NY: llie Free Press (divi­ fought for the rights and privileges that theyoun^r There seems to be an ever-txpanditig ttetwork ofgay been published by The Free Press, revealing sion of Simon & Schuster), 1998,307 pp., j^nerations now enjoy. Their complaint is that many ^Tickets Mew on Sale* andlesbian organii^iions noWf where peopie can acttt- the passionate fticndship between the rwo hardcover, $25. ally apply to become paid staff/or domg things they once oJ the youth today don*i take any responsibility and women. The over 3,500 letters were placed volunteered for. Whafs your opinion on thai? continue the effort. Happy Hour at Milestones is the best place to be... I haven't heard much of this. But then you have I see intergenerationd couples. It's not some­ •Great Entertainment*Free Buffet*Great Drinks@Great Prices 1394 Mt.Hape Ave. 1880 Esst Ave. to remember I come from a community that has thing that strikes me as odd. I think the 473-3820 244-mo almost no concern for youth at dl. So until recentiy resistance f>eople have towards them stems Friday, Nov. 6: The Mambo Kings an adult where I come from wouldn't even come from a kind of ageism and fear that exists in •PB i#« m.. M w _ 1 close to a youth let alone make the accusation that many adults. An instilled fear of queers be­ Friday, Nov. 13: Idina Menzel we*te not doing enough. ing predators or recruiters. \ would like to Hlf'_: f • ' a S^MWBM'. I. • 1 g ^HB1 What do you think gay and ksbian youths shouid he thfnk people respected youths enough to ll^fe 4r^^4MBg| Friday, Nov. 20: Meg & The Clams P., doing for activism? Many sayyout h should fust have fun. see them as thinkir\g individuals capable of Others say they shouidbe more pro-active in their ottm cause. making their own choices. I believe youth I don't know if there's a universal answer to this have the mentality and strength of character question. It would depend upon the f>erson and to stand up for themselves . Contrary to Milestones... where it's the music that matters mvm^ what he or she is capable of. Also, it would depend what so many adults think, youths who are on what a certain environment needs... with older persons are not forced into those esdniee Pm wondering about the dynamic you hat^ with your relationships. People automatically assutne non-queer peers. Do you matte a conscious attempt to thai youths are disempowered in educate tijem on various issues or doyou keepyour ideas to intcrgenerational relationships, that the I yourself? youth is compromised. Rarely—if at all — REDHOT Well, I sec myself as a hell-raising queer, so no, is this the case. kV:,,:;.. «ri«\B. I don't keep things to myself But I try to have a lot Wbat do you think ofRochester? r 1 /-*/•••' of faith in peopie. If they're close to me, I try to I like it. Visibility seems to be very good mdntain a bdancc between tmsting them and here, though this may bc because I've oniy "^ chaUenging them. gone to places where there's something ex­ GERBIL Hottf doyou challenff ihem? pliddy queergoing on. Actually, Rochester's A Qsa««Bv* CtstewtrvB Zititt Mostiy through humor. I'll make a bondage a lot like Sdt Lake, only a bit more hip. A true Our beds are worth HPUMK *PMIH ftnMf *lnlii SMIBB ioke, for instance, to test their boundaries, to see tnid-sized city. \Xlien people think of New lsiyj>wwwiiitea(ftij»i|lipi*i^^ ^m\m. where they stand on certain issues. York State thcy think of New York City. getting into. What are your jeeiings about intttgeneratiottal reiation­ Thcy forget that NY. state has smdl towns. ships? rurd areas, and mid-sized cities, just like Thcre*s a lot of resistance to it for sure. I've every other state in this country. Freewheelers All proceeds will be utilizetl never had a problem with it as a concept or when To fund AIDS relief programs BICYCLE STORE St REPAIR CENTER •* ... ftgjgcy. SERVICE EXCmSIVES !; FREE CD Sampler / ctnbfe bikes ^am Krotdi kecowe factoiy outmbly While supplies last! proper lubrkaticn, cjignmefif and in^iechon. HOPSEWORKS a new bkycie and receive lifeHme free mdnfenonce. Mldiaal V. WmneStme FRccwNcetats sais IfiSr IKOSaN Bl@ ftt VfiMN - siOR SQU^ --. . . 3450 WINTON PLACE • ROCH6STBI. NY 14623 r^ ^^' pi«3 427.7«20 • FAX I7I6J 427.7*13 aON HOBf » NnGD^ S1QIIE> IMS v/w.recordarchive.com KDNUiDCic^iiifniiisrai •'i .y. B4 ^ects that you 10 Toiler VaUgfi Office Park . Pii^afenl NT tASZA •••^ bring in Forgot! admire are li^t shadows and, you get it, the ones you detest are the dark shadows. They are Call For Professional, Personal Representmiott far: shadows because we haven't yet owned or 'da hunk." integrated them. But you can bet we notice • Purchases & Sales of Real Property On Your Side them in other people. I remember telling my friends about a thera­ • Real Property Partnership Agreem^its , By Katen Robby pist that I had years ago. My description was • Wills & Estate Planning ^^Introducing myself glowing: he's sensitive, intelligent, creative, duid^^lih' spiritual, and on and on, until they would stop • Small Business tr^isactions As a beginnir^ to tssy first articks in Tbe Btitpty mc and say* **So what, so are you." Closet^ I suppose it would be important to intro­ *»*y-T 1^1*1 ti^inmiH^ I also temember a boss I had in my eariy 20s duce myself. My name is Karen Robby and IVc % who I could never please. ! felt so inadequate >rl7 Rassell: 387-0600 just begun to work for AIDS Rochester, Inc. * y'lW^imfiWiinijwiijyfiwiWu^ny^pHjii and poky arotmd her. In hindsi^t, I realize You're ri^tj Fm fillingChrist y Simon's piace as .^ilbo mey that I was the one giving myself all the critical a prevention educator and outieach person for mess^es and creating an impossible work the lesbian coinmunity. Fm thrilled to bc here situation for myself. and be a part of such a woriiderfial organizatjlon! 4 Relationships are another great opportuiuty I was brought up here in Rochester, but have to learn about projections. I noticed that I Anthropologically the role ofgay and lesbian not resided here for about 20 years. I spent 14 As you may have noticed, I am often prone to tended to be attracted to people's positive years in the Bay area in Califomia and thc last rants and harangues. It must be the Italian in people in tnbal cultures has been tha|of healer. "^tics first, only to discov« tiTat their nega­ five years in central Vermont. Tve been back in mc. Last tnonth I explorecl what it meant to me spiritualist, and shaman, and today it is prob­ tive qualities were lurking nearby waiting for a MARy KAy Rochestcr since July and have been finding to become a man, and I put forth a challenge to ably no coincidence that so many priests (yes perfect situation to cmetge. Another pattern that every day keeps pointing at the theory, the gay community to become men. However, John Paul it is true) and ministers are also v was to act out ofmy own negative qualities by "What was meant to be, was meant to be" (as when I fc-rcad thc essay I realized I had been frequendy gay. Furthermore, many of us are criticizitig myself when I gave too much credit my mother would say). Even tiiough tiiere are rather preachy and at rimes sounded like an called to rhe professions of the healing arts, to others for possessing a positive quality I days that I miss the incredible vistas and pcace- embittered cjueen. The tone in parts of the education, and management which place a didn't own myself. 1 might say to myself: ftdness ofmy mountain home in Vermont, the essay seemed a bit acerbic and angry, and in fact tremendous emphasis on etnpathy. **You'rc so bad at {protecting your time to do syncroniciry of this move and thc events sur­ I think some ofmy own internalized homopho­ Gay men have also challenged thc dominant WiiA^i^ EAunequals the creative things you love to do, youll never <'w rounding it have been too many to ignore. I bia was leaking out through my frustration with paradigm of coupling. Every possibk combi­ have time to finish making masks like so and so know I'm in the right place, doing what I need aspects ofour community. nation and permutation is represented in gay does." However, when I own the positive, I healthy- looking to be doing. men's reiationships. For some the road of I was joking with friends how I felt I had had am able to say instead, **rm a creative mask monogamy brings happiness and that is won­ s k i 11 Last year at this time, I was here visiting a Larry Kramermomentafterwriting the piece, maker and I value my ability to create them." derful. For others though relationships take family after my brother had passed away from and while there is certainly room for such Once you can recogruze the dark and light liiMiii) iK'^iiiis >M\h ho«lthy-lo«»kiiig skin, and with Marv Kflv. ytrti'v*- ^ai various altemate forms, and this is wonderful csinccr Our family relationships had changed rants, and while I stand behind what I had said shadows in other people, and you're able to a p^i-ai siHri. (iusutfuiw'*! iu \vveK!i your skin's tndivsduai neeffc, jWnr>'Aitr^ too. Some men have various types of open THANKSCnftniG WEEKEMD for the better and spending time here was and the challenge I had made, I realized thar I consistendy name them whenever you see !>asie skin care h ii ;spnik* and elTeflive systen* thai piovklrs essential relationships, some couples have relationships important I picked up a schedule of the Les­ had left out a vety important message. I forgot them, then the next step is to look for those IMO VEMBER 27-29 • AUDITORIIIIMI CEIHTEit care, (^fl me today fur a ft^« ronsuliMtion and fwial. based on forms of role-play including master bian and Gay Film Festival and decided to try to also say how wonderful gay men are, and I quaUties in yourself. Recentiy, while doing a Aittdrea L Wfaitcomb and servant to daddy and son, others have Tickets at Ticket Express (100 East Ave) and all Ticketmaster outlets and get myself out into the community again would like to take this opportuiuty to rectify project together, a friend commented to mc IndepeDdeDt Besattfty Conssltant monogamous relationships of thtee (ormorc), and socialize. my oversight. that my impatience reminded her ofher father. 2Stf4«27 and still others choose n*it to have romantic fcOBSOBs 222-5000 23K2-t900 r3o<«r^..Li>r«^, I took myself to the Lesbian Shotts night on While i wish to extoi the virtues of gay men, 1 cringed at the thought of being impatient. A3fne@aolcom relationships at ali, yet stiU fee] fulfilled. While _ _ prodxKitd by RBTl A Albert Noccdoljno Oct. 18. Ofcourse^ because I had waited to the I believe it is important that we da not get Growiiig up, I conststntiy needed to le^im to do last minute, I discovered that the tickets were caught-up in tiie trap of playing the game I have certainly left out many F>ossible types of ^^^ q^ckly because my own father was so relationships, what I have tried to illustrate is sold out. I meandered around fnr quite a while "we're better than-..lesbians...non-gay impatient. He would immediately take over if thatgay men have worked in very creative ways to locate a ticket, and in the midst of this people...whomever." It is not about being I didn't do something automaticaliy and per­ to find happiness and fijlfiUment in their con­ joumey I met a woman who was in the same better or worse- We do not need to put down fecdy. I vowed Fd never be that way; Fd be necting, which is no easy feat for anyone to do. search. ^X^at can I say... the connection was another group for us to have power and im­ eternally patient. We live in a ver>' sex negative culture. One there— immediately, and we watched rhe films portance. When we diminish other groups in After hearing my friend's observation, I need only to turn on the television to hear together, proceeded out afterwards and con­ an attempt to affirm our importance wc pro­ took a closer look. (Believe me, I didn't want putitanical values around sexuaJity being taught tinued our conversations at an eariy breakfast vide ourselves with only a very flimsy sense of to.) There it was in mel (Sometimes I do feel tiirough the cotnmercial of "not me... not at a nearby greasy-spoon joint. value. I believe wc can bc wonderful and have impatient, or like ic •would be easier for me to now." Our society teaches us to be afraid of Now,one year later, Tm living with this same power, stretigth, and importance in our own just do whatever it is myself.) Now 1 recognize our body, our sensuality, and our sexuality. woman, the love of my life, and happier than right, rather than having it come at the expense the shadow. (Fm uncomfortable around my Gay men, however, have throughout history IVe ever been. IVc also represented ARI at this of others. father's inability to let me try things, make launched campa^ns to challenge these beliefs Wednesdoy, November 18 year's film festival. Never underestimate the I would like to offer a caveat or two before mistakes and leam how to do things.) I have through our advertisements of **yes me... right power of "coincidences" and those "God, this I begin to talk about how wondeiful gay men named it. (He's impatient.) Then I find it in ® School of the Arts now." While we have often been criticized for is weird" situations. They're around us a lot, if are. I realize full well that this artick could myself (Ugh! I do that, too.^ Then 1 begin the our sexual expression, wc have also demon- we stay open to them. Most importandy, never easily cross thc vcry ^•ox^ line into the land of process of owiung it and eating the projection. underestimate the power of going to the sntazmy-ness and become saccharinely sweet. strattd chat sex is posidve and creative rather (Q^p, g^^^ ^ow all thafs left is digesring it ImageOut Film Festivai! To that end, it '\%txs ^ sincere hope that this tZd"^ "^ something th«t n?ed* to be „^ ^^„^ ^^^^j^ ^p ^„ ^ „^ ^^^ ^^ ^^^ Only a turkey Since IVc been in Rochester, IVc made lots article does nor compel others to link hands patient with myself Only then can I be truly of connections with local conununity theatres and march down the street singing endless Yes, It IS tme tiiat we have many challenges ^^^^^ ^^^ ^^^^ (the other career in my life), Fm directit^ a verses of Kum-ba-ya. Most importandy, my ahead of us to become men, but it is also true c ^^\ i - j-rr- i- i_ play, teaching some actix^ classes and working intention is not to undo last month's article, , . ^ ' , Some lessons can be difficult as thcy repeat that we need to recognise and celebrate our ^^„ ^^ over, atound and around the spiral of for ARI. All of these opponunities have been but rathbr to have thie essay stand side-by-side uniqueness and independent power. It .s ourperceptions. Once you begin toleam about p>art of my dreams and now they ate conung with the chalice^ pceviously put i^O^ wonderfulnesthrough the recognitios that wen ar ane dabl cdebratioe to reclain mofou thart yo„,p^j^«ions. you can start to reclaim those tme. So much can change in one jrear of your Gay men are wonderful. While we may of­ important aspects of yourself that you either which has been taken from us through the life. \K/hat a great way to mm 4011 feel Ukc I've ten struggle with the chaOenges of creating and never developed or maybe dlidn't even know years and endless messages ofhatred and re­ found new ctirections in life and a firesh start maintainingintiaiacyinour romantic relation­ existed. The morc projections you cat the pression. Our celebration of self and commu­ Here's to mkl-iife] ships, we are tmly masters at Cfeating dose, bener you know yourself. You find yourself nity will provide healing and growth. If I may, I look forward to working with the lesbian lo^ng^ and intimate 6iendship9. Gey men cre­ feeling more authentic and freer; It's fantastic! I would like to expand the defirution of be- commmii^ hete in Rochesttr and bdn^lif^ as ate ^oendshipft with conocetkkns that are amaz- Paula de Chtlty, PkD,, is apsyehoiiten^ist amd caming a man to also include the necessity of many diouj^ts ^ttd as mueh inlbnnatkia I cen ia^ ktyitl and deep, and our friendships are educator who speciais^s itt wemett's issttes. celebrating the wonder and miracle of our gay to this column monthly. Ifyou have any sug­ not limited to only other gay men. In some body, our gay nund, our gay spirit^ and our gay gestions of issues or tx^Mcethat need expkmng friendships this connection is so deeply felt soul. feel free to call me at ARI* 442-2220. Thanks that we describe the relationship in consan­ Dyice Psyche wouldn't go. for reading. FU chat witii you next month. guineous terms mcaaing tiiat we are of the By Esther Rothblum :?•• same biood, we are finnily. In these special Womanspirit ftiendships we use tenns like 'Vve are sistets" Being an old losbian i . Beconilii^ a orin tite wotdsofMsdcMiR^gs, we Ate ''brother By Dr. Paula I recently tnet with three membeis of the Crones, $900 in cash prizes to brother, brother to btnther." deChcUy a gtoup fbr old lesbtans in Vennont. '*We were fv ,.• Man Doors Open • 6:00 pm • Bingo Starts • 7:00 pm While at tiines we ate dguilty of protracting Owning Your Shadows at a dance one tught," said Alverta, "and I asked ottr ckwB and hevio^our share of cat ^hts, die wtjntim I was with, whete are all the lesbians - Plenty of sects ovoitable fdr wK-insi ** Ploiectionis one of those psychological mecha­ By 0f« Dennis J. gey tnen (aaft iff odiet scsuial mioonties) are ourage.^* CQShor^fyl abo unrivvled in dieir capectty fbr empathy nisms that can fedhorribl e until you catch on. They put an ad in the local lesiMan newspa­ COM the BINGO office • 4412220 fbr nore info and to reserve tobies for groups of 6! eawflftT others. This aMity is perhaps due to Once you begin to understand what you are per, and had to drop the minimum age to 40 the sttugg^ out of the cioset and our work to projecting out onto other people and you own Somo noodod flfi*tuiiiiig because there wete so few lesbians older than resolve our self-hatred and seif-recriimination. it, then the freedom is fantastic. that who were out in the commuruty at that k.«w^aiV<»l>)i(M<

B6 :^pH-^i8-vM •m:':r- TVW^^' M.:M^ yatA>fcn iuiv« to be to<^ And Sin^ did not care. But the advice is: tell the an impossible task. Forewarned with the "how they were living in times that wete tnote af­ there are exceptions: one parent reported that "here wc all sit together in your living room understandable concem. In virtually all of the jHidiii^ somediing as integral as an kktttity of^^buae; i^SlepMt^ ifae chibfs ^^, chikl, give diem information and then let him to's" tnost children successfully manage such firming oflesbians, but hostile to old women when he told his 17-year-old son Duane that and wonder where are the lesbians in their 60s families I interviewed* the threat of custody from individuflls so clo^ and loved by os is lemA of miiiuiqr^ ifil^^ it mutt % kept a or faer make decisions. Like everything else txt infonnation. (Xt should be remembered that as Yet everyone agreed that ageism was worse in he and John were a couple, Duane barely and 70s like us." The women agreed that some occupied an enbnnous barrier to honesty. hauA. Is it any wonder thitpareaCs whobdo tius s««xet and ftbm,#^^ -^ tlie dkil^s peer Ufe, we wish we could protect diem; fiii every­ usual, parents know besc some childten may the gay male and in the heterosexual commu­ looked up from the magajzine. When his dad of these older lesbians are extremely closeted Wfiere it exists, parents have to make a choice •iaaef feei alienated (tool tla^ diOten? tl^ I^HEM^ ttiC^g^iAiiaiod^u:)!^ — and diing else in life, wc can't be less able to cope with this burden than ni ty- said, "Did you hear what 1 just said?/* his soli's or out to only one other person. They lived between asking their child to keep a secret (and ^ite who have kept our lives a secret find that of cburse, d^' child's unicjue personality. 4. Arm them with strat^es others). Surely, if one is going through a testy many parents are understandably worried about reply was, "Get over it dad, it's the *90s." through times that were very hostile to lesbi­ For more information about the Crones, tfie hudk of honesty impedes affecckm. disai* Z QukkenwDrryabouttheirownsesKtt- For tnany children thc first response is the or odietwise difficult time with the relation­ the consequences of such a choice) or living in While this example is amusing, it ia not a ans and aren't willing to be too out, even to write to 143 Rolling Irish Road, Milton, VT kmis comfort in our own homes and dtestes ^ty. doset and thcy choose not to tell or tell very ship, it may be better to wait In general, constant fear. typical one for patents who wait un4 idbles- other old iesbians. Many don't even use the 05468. ^nnant anxiety — do the neighbors know, This is particuiady the case when the chil- few friends and these are picked with thc though most kids armed with explanations cence or for "the first question" to be pOSed. word "lesbian" — they refer to themselves as Esther Rothblum is Professor of Psycbolegy at tbe For both families who did decide to tell the fupt>ose one of jaBe's ftietris suspects* &i dtia leant of ifae p^^^ts sesuality dudi^ ado­ ulxnost cafe. There are tools parents gjve chil* about the teasons for the secret not only cope Another son who had accepted the rektion­ "that way" or use other euphemisms. university of Vermottt attd editor ^ Me Journal of children and even fbr those who didn't, most Tim see us the otiier n^nP Whiie thtowing lescence or evim S tficy knew before, it be­ dren that help them through this hurdle: many but feel more included in the family. In addi­ did subscribe to "the earlier the better." One ship during his formative years, wanted his I asked what Alverta, Mary and Joy thought Lesbian Studies. She eatt be reached at fohn Dettf^ ea^ other off the couch is amusing when we comes a ''bigger''issue when adolescence rears stepparents agreed to "be an aunt" or a "good tion, the stepparent is acknowledged as a mem­ parent reported, "I had aiways told her that parents to "hide the relationship" when he hit the major issues are facing lesbians over 60. HaU, V. ofVermont, Buriitt^n VTQ5405, and at ttdl k in our lesbian orgay fiend's bouse, living m ugly head. Most parents found diat giving feiend". In bne case, a male couple waited until ber of that famiiy, allowing the relationship men loved men, women loved women and adolescence. The stepmother reported that Getring a job and facing ageism, said Alverta. estiter. rotbbiuttt@jivm. edu. Dfykt Psycite is a mottthiy with fear is never portive fbr boikltng a rela­ teassurances ahd cttii^ the statistics which the daughter's boyfriend left before going up between the stepparent and the child much women and men loved each other; telling her •*when he brought friends home he would rush Leaving a husband, coming out as a lesbian, colutmt, tionship of commitment and strength. As one show litde tendency for correlation between to bed so he would not suspect needed growth. about myself didn't seem unnatural to her — through che house closing all thc doots so no mother complained, "Thc only time we can bf and being thought too old for full-time work being raised by gays and becomii^ gay he^ 5. Develop extemal support Certainly we cannot deny that there are and she was four at the time! one would guess how many bedrooms to how outselves is on the weekend." And another, yet not old enough for social security, said lessen these fears. Researchers have found that children who instazKCs where because of custody, jobs, par­ Others were more subtie, using friends their manypeople." *We have to plan for our time to be a couple." Mary. Being closeted on the job and needing to Stepfamilies 3. What if my ftiends 6nd out? know other children being brought up by les­ ents, in-laws or the other myriad of barriers children did know were "together" to pave the Children whose parents wait may find them­ One said, "I just love thera all ao much and move in order to live- near a lover, said Joy. This Is an across the board ptoblem whete bians and gays utilize them as resources. Being lesbians and gays face, honesty about our iden­ By Jean M. Lynch way for their own admission. For example, selves at a disadvantage in a number of ways. when I look at them, want to tell them and give Working for a non-profit organization that has age is only a slight factor. All Itids worry about able to talk about and share information with tities is not a reality. It is perhaps the most Laurie and Joan wouid talk about how much First perhaps the hardest to bear is that the them a hug. But I can't." no retirement benefits. Getting sick in old age. Coming out being popular and what their friends will think. others in the same situation is the best asset we difficult road for us, fbr our children, for our their fnends Sue and Anne loved each other ciiildren feei angry and resentful, similar to the Whtkt ha^ypens when children are t«M? In fact, the women agreed that discrimina­ Here too honesty is the best response. One can give to our children. And it doesn't hurt relationships. (I always think: I can't imagine In my interviews with parents and stepparents and explain that they werc a couple. Using them way we feel when our children "act up behind tion due to age was more severe than discrimi­ 1. In my interviews reactions ranged parent reported that ftom day one she armed their parents eitheri One teenage son leamed saying to heterosexuals, we want you to com­ throughout thc U .S., coming out loomed large as an illustration, the children, already fond of our back." For one thing, many of them sus­ nation due to being a lesbian. Mary had noticed from "yeah, so what>" to the "oh, gtoss" her chiid with information and "what ifs." She that his best friend*s dad was gay when the best mit to a relationship with no legal or social as one ofthe greatest challenges. The majority Mom andjoan's friends, more readily accepted pect anyway, and if they don't, their peers that even the personal ads in the local newspa­ variety. Even those children who at first were told her child it was the child's decision who friend reported that his dad's car also sported confirmation, deny the love you have for each of those I interviewed were in stepfamilies — the situation when they were informed. often do. Second, they feel that their parents pers had "seruors" under a special section. where one or both parmers had come to the shocked and disgtuntied, however, quickly rose and what she wanted to tell but also wamed a rainbow bumper sticker. OnJy then did they other, set up separate bedrooms and tcll no Some families do decide to wait until adoles* have lied to them and righdy so — we didn't They mentioned a lesbian friend who had relationship with children from a previous to the occasion and accepted and e\'entually that some people or their parents might not finally share their cotnmon experiences. one. Yet many individuals want gays to do just cence or until their children ask. Each of these trust them enough to even let thern know what stated her age in a personal ad and got almost heterosexual (I prefer the term mixed-sex) were proud of their families. Other research­ approve. Unfortunately, experience is thc best 6. Bc your child's ad^'ocate dtis. These are often the same persons who decisions frequendy meets with a range oi kind of a family they lived in; third, we have no resp>onses. marriage. I chose to interview those families ers have argued that it is not that their mother teacher and yes, some of those interviewed One of the greatest strengths that lesbian argue, "But their relationships are so un­ "It's even hard for older iesbians to meer which had thc chiid(ren) at least six months of and gay families show is the remarkable atten­ stable."). someone to be friends or just someone to hang the vear since for them, the decision to come f tion we pay to our children. Children in thc Based on my interviews wirh those who out with," said Alverta. *'VC'liercdo older lesbi­ out and the degree is particularly cmcial. lesbian and gay community are not taken for were forced to make this decision, I summa­ ans disapp>ear to?" the women wondered. Per­ Coming out is an issue for everyone in the Richard D. granted; most parents beUeve that because of rize their best advice: haps some leave to take care of families of lesbian and gay commurut)% whether or not the threat of custody or other barriers their 1. Make sure that you as a couple have origin, they thought. children are a part of the relationship. The VETORINARY children are prized possessions. In my inter­ time to feed the relationship; living in a situa­ The Crones talked about interacting with presence of children certainly complicates the Fenwick views, I found that all parents adapted their tion of hiding is very difficult and it can cake its younger lesbians. >X^en older and younger decision and the behavior of their parents. It HOSPITAL behavior to make the child comfortable. And toll on a relationship; finding time to be to­ lesbians become lovers, people may assume is particularly difficult in those complex situ- Contractor I was impressed — it is hard to imagine our gether and be yourselves is crucial. that one is the other's mother. It's hard to go to ations where the relationship is begun with an Now offering Hunter-Dougias 720 Pittsford-Victor Rd. own parents or any heterosexual parents going 2. Tell your children about the impor­ individual who already has children. Previous to such length! the health care center and have a 20-year-old louver drapes & Kirsch mini Pittsford, New York 14534 tance and authority of the stepparent. While woman do the intake exam. research shows thar lesbians and gays who and veiti(»ri liifnds. Depending on their developmental stage, the child may not see this person as a parent Old women are caJJed yA^isc^ said /VJvcrta, yet adopt, or have children tiirough artificial in­ (716) 248-9590 children's demands on behavior range from due to the necessity o^hi^n^ at rhc very least they are ignored in meetings that include semination or other alternative means have Design, Dry Wall, Decl(s, not wanting anyone, ever, anywhere to know the stepparent should not bc perceived %s an younger women. Joy found that the younger "worked out" many of the choices before the Carpent^, Property Managment to asking their parents to be "more out." And individual isolated from the nucleus of the women go off to socialize together and don't child(ren) app>ears on the scene. thc same child can vary between these two family. When Should Children Be Told include the older lesbians. But the women did Repairs to full replacement ANDY FLEMING, extremes as weU. One parent noted, "And in 3. If at all possible, surround yourselves feel that they have become more outspoken as Many researchers agree that no age is too the same week she wanted no hand-holding with receptive and supportive lesbians and thev have become older. young to inform children about parental iden- Free estimates DVM ind in fact even wanted us to walk on opposite gays who do know and who can provide accep­ sides ofthe street! Then that stopped and she Cai! & leave message tance rhat you are a family. m would walk arm in arm with both of us. We Concluaion went with the kid flow**. That is the typical Orientals, UpholsWry Se Fine Fabh(^ 288-0032 1. If at all possible, tell your children, as response of the most successful stepparents. eariy as possible and according to their level of That does not mean parents have to comply understanding. Tafctag^Mtf cam of row cwpM Mirf uyhoMtry nnA with every demand made. One stepparent re­ 2. Arm your children with relevanr in­ DRY FOAM EXTRACTION SYSTEM ported that when Tracy hid all of their family formation, strategies for hiding when they pictures before a party, hc stopped her. But hc No Steam or Over Saturation choose this path tfW strategies for confronta­ [Dries in just a few short hours) was able to tum the experience mto a lesson in tion when they do not. Continue discussing values, explaining how for them, home was No Toxic Dry Cleaning Fluids these issues with them as thcy grow and change. where they could all feel proud and safe. And, 3. Establish a famiiy that accepts one No Shrinkage or Bacterial Build-up hc cautioned her, if we deny who we are within another and can provide children with a sense Eliminate Pet Flood & Fire Odors our family home, then eventually you too will AronM. Bk>ch«r that you ate a family. The stepparent should be lose pride in this family. Call (716) 234-7075 for a free estimate. Owner/Opetator rrrt PemiietdieMU recognized and treated as such. ELECTR r>emiUU.tt*«^tft>ii. Wbat if y[tjii;k can*t <:onie out to your chil­ 4. Surround yourselves with other les­ 7t6-Si6~trS2 sts-see-tfor dten? bians and gays, preferably other families with Keepuig a Secret. In those instances where children. the parents ask their child(ren) not to tell they 5. Trust yourself and your children; to­ are asking for a lot On the othet hand, it is my gether you are a strength, a force to be reck­ -fliLiy INSURED- opinion after reading others' research and ana- oned with! lyzingmy own interviews, that askinga child to fean M. Ijyrseb, PhD., is an assoeiate professor tf FREE EST! MATES keep a secret is still preferable to keeping her or Soeitdegt at Miattti Umtnersity in Cheated, Ohio. • Therapy for individuals, Massage Therasiy couples, children, \VE 00 rr RADIANT vnwAir 5Monrs WELLNESS gay and lesbian families Ameiicait Baptists Concerned • Parent/child conflict PAGgR; 738-9467 ofthe Rocliester Area ASSOCIATES • Sexual abuse recovery • Chronic physical and Lavender/Mint eye pillow with the purchase of A fijeiufly, supportive groi^) for giy, tesbisn Leigh Ehresman, MS. Ed. emotional pain Psychotherapy OTKI One-Hour Massage. md boexusl BiqMisti snd thttr fiiei^ Therapeutic • Resolutton of conflicts MMts mondi^ - IbM Mondays, 7:30 P.M. Splrtt/MlrKi/Bodywork • Anxiety and depression ffMB#MLliMB 57 AndmMS Street

-•-'•( Fi$tdymer tmm voice, redaim yottr itmer pouter, Uam to prtnttetu yottr omm beabb. Cafl ShMey st3»2-2998 for deta^ For appointment, caH 482-4396 *HDi ^^^fefc.^^S^&^ RESOURCES FOF? AIDS Directorx

for HIV exposure is available from New York State Department of Heakh: MeaLTH: catt Rochester Area Regk»nai Hodine at (7I6)423-808K or 1-800-962-5063 fbr pay phones Wonlaa jKfalMiMt« Vlol^tjt Emiron- or caUs ouc^de Rochester. Deaf or hinuing impabM people shouM call (716)423-8120 HonrM OMM^ WofnM's HiwKIt memt (WJVI^> hmm of violence agiinst (TOD.) Oral testing now available. Statewkfe Infomiation can be obtained by calfing 1-800- TOM MHMnhip. 111 WadyiRd,RoditMr wonMfi.POBq9C I^SaSochetterNY 14608. S4UAS>S, Odier organizations v^ich provide AIDS*rcfated servkes are as feliows: Nt I46«2; (716)274-6978. Cott^M-«h«n- • Interior & 234-9709. wwW.moorcresultft.coni/WAVE AIDS Rochester, Inc., 1350 UnWerslty Ave., provfcles education, referrab to appropriate sl^ brcflot cancar screening svvieeft for Exterior Paint- Mailewal OrpmJrwHlnit far Wotwan service agencies, c^em: and ^unily servkes, advocacy fer peopfe fedng HIV-Hnked discrimi­ iMtoured Stfid undsrkvw^ women. ian counsel RociiNOWQaeLcom Web page: ^n-Voung ^Bt^ an all-woman staff provide appointment needed; drop in between 5-9 pm. Free, confkjentiai testing every Thursday • Remodonng www.mooreresufts.com.NOW tiomE Of cAttMHV tcannotts TtttKtwKtigntrns* nigiit, 5-9 pm; no appointment necesnry. Outreach van testing available on weekends. • Quality vybrti CULTUflAL: Ams Rochestfer Women'* HmjMh Rochestar Women's Community HelpiilC Peopfe wldi AIDS. Inc (HPA) P.O. Box 1543 Rochester NY 14603-1543 Is a REASONABLE Oictreacfi. HIVprevention. Contact Chris­ non^F>^ol}t. vokinteer organization. HPA raises and distributes funds to support programs www.cMrotkNSKAitAaias.coti^ Chorus. 2184)366 (See OBV>^ cakndar). tine Simons, 441-2220, ext 3026. AIDS that provkfe services to peopfe living widi HIV and AiDS. Funding is provided to agencies RATES Woman's Cowwi wrfty l^ariamiawca Rochester. I3S0 University Ave ARI also fecaieed m the counties of Monroe, OntaHo* Schuyler, Seneca, Livingston, Ciiemung, Steuben, ProH>Ct. (VViM ytOnaii^ V^^ Ml Yates. Hodine (716)987-1853. has odter service fer HIV positive wonien. WBONtSSOAYS 7 PM-Ttll mance group. Sharon Jeter, artistic director. FREE ESITMAFES Covmnunltsr Health Network. 758 Oay Alliance ofthe Genesoe Valley peer fediitators can provkJe referrab to physicians 740 lMy«rsrcy Ave. 654-7709. n South Ave. 244-900CX Support group for and servke agenda. Person on duvf MonTThurs. 1-9:30 pjn., Fri. 1-6 pjn. Message spolrrs: mechine other times. (716)244-8640. HIV positive women, 'tlaklng Connec­ SATtntMTtS 9 PM' ClOSS Women's baskethaH. Monday, Thurs­ 729-8689 tions*" Contact Lyn Bbckbum. Meets first HIV/STD Coordination Project of Honroe County, 111 Westfoll Rd., run through day nights» 7'9 pm, Oowncown United Prt;^ and third Mondays, 9:30*11 am. Pre-imer- Monroe County Department of Health, provides infbrmation, education and training* and l^rtan Qiurch, 121S. Fkdn^ St. Ramona, view ret^lred. ''Moms Etc" support ^oup maintains a resource library. (716)274-6114 (V/TTY), PAGER: 527-3656 91tMK SPSCtAlS 244*1640. fer aU female caregivers: contact Sydney Corrnnunity Health Network (CHN). 758 South Ave. Aggressive early intervention GENERAL: •"Tom from MiiUiflf •" Metzger. CHN has many other fecasgroups medkal care for all aspects of HIV/AIDS care. Clinical trials* programs for women, mental Woman's Resource Center. YWCA, and services for HIV positive women and health and sociai work/case managemenc (7 J 6)244*9000. 3fOtt2 MOMMY - FttiltAY 175 N. Clinton Ave. 546^7740. HIV negative partners. Rochester Area Task Force on AIDS (RATFA) is a collection of agencies providing Slice of Life Cafe. Femin^ vegetarian Altematives for Battered Women. a multiplicity of resources and services to the upstate New York community. Their offkes restaurant. 742 Souti) Ave. 271-8080. NOttM - 8 PM. 232-73S3. Si^eher, counseling. Lesbians wel­ are fecai^ through the Finfer Lakes Health Systems Agency, which also provkies Silkwood Boolcs. Women's bookstore. medical literature and newspaper clippings, as well as demographic and statistical data for come* 633 Monroe Ave,, 473-8110. use in dewek>ping health care servkes. (716)461*3520, Victim RtMWNirce Center of Wayne CoaMon fer Lesliian VisMttty. Di­ Oxmty. Newark N,Y. Hodine 800^56- UStS YOint TtCNSTS TO 10 PM, verse group of women hoidkig podudcs/ Men of Color Health Awareness Project (MOCHA). HiV prevention focus for men I (72; offke (315)331-1171; fax (3150331- socials in Finger Lakes area. Second Satur­ who have sex wfth men (MSM) in the minority community. Support groups, onti on one peer 1189. education, safer sex workshops, refermi servkes, buddy testing. Rochester Center fer days. Bedcy Bly, (3 E 5)539-6271. Hary Magdalene House* Wonr>en's Independent Living. 758 South Ave. 442-6470. Omk ttur ttKMtlfQntiongetktgtxitsgttiars for CAtttMN'S KAItAOKt CSiesnSTtNO outreach center for HIV positive women more ^oupf rary in the Leroy V. Good and women at rislc 291 Lyetl Ave. Open In-line for rcforrah, at 2 44-8640. Anti send us Ubrary. 1000 E. Henrietta Rd. 424-5200. Mon-f=H. 6:30-9:30 pm 458-5728, your jnfbm^KitJGnf Honroe County Health Department, at 855 W. Main St., offers testing and counselkig TNSttt 2N9 tINNtVatSARY POUTICAL: for HiV and other sexually transmitted diseases. (716)464-5928. Strong Hemoriai Hospital provides a complete range of HW medksd care, induding

«?! access to experimental treatment protocols, arid HIV testing. AJso provides individual and AT ANTHONrS 522 group psychotherapy. Trakiing of heaidi care professionals aiso available. Infectious The nscent advances in the treatment I Disease Clinic, (716) 275-0526. Department of Psychiacry. (716) 275-3379. AIDS Trainir^g ofAIDS provide new hope and Prefect, (716) 275-5693. 4306 Cnlver Ruad SAT. NOY. 28TH prolonged life. CHN brings those advances to you including: AIDS Remembrance Garden. Highland Park South. Rochester. Infoline (716)234- • HIV testing and education 1640. Mailing address: 935 East Ave., Rochester NY 14607. • Experimental drugs and rei&earch 323-1690 SPECIAI SHOW 7 P.M. Planned Parenthood of Rochester and Genesee Valley offers testing and Infbrma­ • Counseling and support groups Near Seabreeze Park • Nutritional services to promote tion (716)546 2595 healthy eating Threshold Youth Center provkies confkfential tiesting for young people ages 12-25. Fees OpeaTiesday-Satirday STARTIHG THent 31tl> YSAR • Medicd! care for all patients on sliding scale, no one denied servke. Threshold Center for Alternative Youdt Servkes, regardless oi ability to pay 80 St Paul St 454^7530. be considere Rncer Lakes Family Care wili provide confkfential or anonymous free testing in CoMMUNrrv Ontarkk/Wayne Counties. I-800-650-9853. HEALTH Action Front Center (Action for a Better Community.) Provkies HiV prevention mtreatabk" education and case management servkes. Training and technkai assistance to service NETWORK providers. Resource library open to public All services free and confidential. Multicultural Dr. Peter Piot and bitingual staff. Rudy Rivera, program manager. 150 N. Ointon Ave. Hours 8:30-5 pm, Uniteii Nations AIDS Program Monday-Friday. 546-6180; fex 546-5669. Free anonymous HIV testing on walk-ki basis, Thursdays 9 anv 4 pm, pro^tidttd throun^ NYSDOH at Action Front Center, 242 Andrews A Rainbow Community St Carmen Ffeu, 262-4330. CadioEc Charities AiDS Sonrtees. Provkfes linkage with other servke provkfers. AFhtan^ More Light is a nationai network of inclusive Presbyterian churches tnunsportation and finandai assistance for houskig. Monday-Friday 8:30 am- 4:40 pm. I i 50 ^rience the versatiliiy Buffafe Rd. 328-3210. welcoming gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered persons into full ' • ^*- j-'-d {:-'-^;"n'^' the \fvhc " by Day A Bed by Night co-ministry and life celebration within our worshipping family. Anthony Jordan Health Cantar PrevoMdon and Primary Care Program. HIV WHBIS1VESS BECOHES ccHinseling and tcstir^ (free If uninsured), conimanity outreach. Center Hi-reach w^ fecus on education. Comprehensive l-HV care md sendees, induding medkal treatment, Two services every Sunday at 11:00 am 700 MUCH••• « CXM »id viral feed motticork^ ntedkacfem (on-site pharmacy), OB-GYN care, opdi^^ - a traditional service in the Sanctuary - denni, nutrition, mental heahh and substance abuse servkes. case management, commuity - a contemporary service in Celebration Ha« - CONSIOER THE VALUE OF

of frsmtt aiMi eoms e MiUmTMO CONCERNS biSfldwter Ito dflllMfJ SIQfVlnfS BMaCT a CONFEKMCC COmit (7l6)})f-9IM wmcmUNif Hha-fkmanaiixed Sentce 71*308-1 Mifft )/.n Piaza • -?Pff Floor - 325-7310 tti-ISTO (716) 235-2290 (716)235-4750 THE DOWNTOWN Nofvi sr sAaoi 121 North Fitzhugh St. Rochester. NY 14614 (716) 32&4000 SCOTT C. LALKA, CEO l270ScottsvilieRo«l Rocliester. New York 14624 F»x:(7»6)23S-46TO

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-l-Jif^.J. '%4l>UV —.—•.•.^•p w in Totonto eady in October. Twenty- teftdiennen—tlieTlfl^D SATUR­ In recognidon of our sponsors Frontwalkers running and walkii^ Geotge Eastman House parking lot. BER—The Rams and ITie Bach­ twa Mesiibc^ coiiVcfged otk the DAY of every moadi at the Bach-' Rochester Gay along Park Avenue in red attire — We usuaUy have dinner at a local Toolbox. We pattied with the South­ and members wc are hosdng an open cforJrDnm. QiaHav, 21. tliieR«iis elar Banim ^ifMmate.yoac oonon- including many fabulous red dresses! em O&tado Bears, as well as fnends house in our new location Dec. 10 Men's Chorus restaurant after Wednesday runs and mBthmk mtt^^hUd iUbBoegym *'tki^ (5:30 - 7:30 p,m.).Yes, GRGLBF is To mark National Coming Out Day cofiee after our Samrday runs. fer TM**''.BMt)e^^ fteMgia m- be«r, from Bear Buddies and Montteal moving to our new location at Gate­ Be Homo for the Holidays with die (Oct. 11), our first "Red. Hot and For 1999, a schedule of events is Bovxapped lASUttia^Wf^tt^ ffit« Bears. Well go backagaia fot Memo­ way Poster and Framing Company Rochester Gay Men's Chorus! Out" event was a great success and caking shape, not only of the things FREE ddnk couttesy of die Karos even^^ check out our btiOBliia^Maid rial Dfty» so save that weekend. (actoss &om Village Gate Square on Another holiday season is soon well received by those in the commu­ we would like to do in Rochoter, but and The Bachdor Ponim. M Be* mth^BoM^amBomm^w^io0^- FORAGING at the FORUM has South Goodman). upon us, and as you make yout plans nity who honked hortis, waved, and widi other nattonal clubs as well. cemliMer, jciA die Rama«t 9ie fiach- 1^ Rocilvster Rams, V09m,%W. begun j^aia for ^s season. In Octo­ The Nov. 10 social hour will be at for fhends and family, remember to joined us in laughter and fun as we Pnde Races, the Intemational Fo­ dor Fomm for Ixtogjdbns Nijn^ Itodiestef, KY44603.172^9itfjRpt ber, teddy bears were collected for passed by. the childten of Visiting Nurse Ser­ the Memorial Art Gallery at the usual include thc latgest musical "family" cum in Philadelphia, and other local to neat dungs ^K vt%. on. the *t^ at dme (5:30 * 7:30 p.m.) for one last There were many different styles peopie and fnends who worsliip vices. On Saturday»Nov. 14 (thc sec­ since Maria and the kids came over events are all on the slate. Sometime The Rackatter Rvte is Bodies^" rja[MiMeom.Of||/«Bins rime- We would like to thank our of dress, inciuding a sassy red tennis openly with each otiier. We celebrate Ladies Night ond Samrday} well be back at die the Alps. Thc RGMC celebrates this winter look for a more comf^ete ter-based gay mcn^e motorc|dc/ sponsors and invice everyone to come outfit, a wonderful off-the-shoulder liturgies in the Episcopal aiKl Catho­ Forum, collecting canned goods for Holiday Memories Dec. 11 and 12, listing of upcoming evencs and races leadier chib. Foimded in i97% die check out our new location and our cocktail dress with fringe, and a lic traditions, and welcome all to Out CHN. Anyone donadng wiU be en­ as we visit the ghosts of our winters that Frontmrmers/Fron twalkers will Rams aie one of New Yodt State's At the Nov. 17 meriang organization. We will have hors Sophia Loren look-alike who greeted come, regardless of your religious A new group cafled '^Ladies' Night tered into the drawing fof door pd^es. past and tell the personal stories of be taking part in. moat respected Leadier/Levi oq^ d'oeuvres and holiday music, so do our chorus members. us at the finish line. Accessories also affiliation (or lack of one). Worship Out*' is forming. John Aceto from SaottghbemasM Bring in some goodies from yout oizations. Oui attajor activities in­ not miss the open house at our new ran the gamut, from puka shell neck­ with us Sundays at 5 p.m. in St. Luke- Some si^lgestions:di0Ji^ out, die­ larder, and help dios* in need. Each memory has been inter­ Latino Mission dude hostixig a xDonddy bamig^ at HoftpitsTs Aids VacdfM ftcwiech location in December. For more in­ laces to Bulgari pearl earrings. Many St. Simon the Cyretie church, 17 S* atre, cross country siding, game twined with music as diverse as Latino Mission celebrated its first our iiome bat. The Bachelor Fomm, Progiam as our gocst speaiEcr. Monday nights ^t the movies con­ formation please call our message of us were surprised at how hard it Fitzhugh St. across from the Mon* nig)it5,movies,daytxsp8,plaiietanumt Handel's "Hallelujah Chorus" to Tori anniversary with a terrific time for and conductii^our amiual sommer The meedng g^ undcmy at 7 tinue. Call the Beariine to find out center at 234-8706. was to run (and parade abouti) in roe County Office buiklif^. After potlucks, sporting events, Amos' ^Winter." The Rochettes will the more than 300 pec^e who danced Rams Run, all in the spiritof Broth­ pLm., so plea»e mdce a note to Mtend where and when the movie group wiU such ftilly and glamorous attire. A services each week, we socialize at a SonneobutgOaxdens, etc^ etc^ etc be putting their own unique spin on the night away at Freakazoid on Sept. erhood. While bar lu^itsaU^w us to widi any <{uesticMis you raj^ have meet each week. 234-3381 is thc num­ brunch followed at two members* coffee hour or poduck dinner, where Needed are your ideas to plan fun Lambda Car the "Waltz ofthe Flowers." At intcr- 17. gadier with members of our ccmi- on this important research pcotect. ber to inquire about the BEARS or home. We hope to make this an you are welcome to join us! nroesl Call 227-0672 for mote info. tnission plan on purchasing the per­ Many thanks to The Gay Aiiiance munity and oelebcate^ the fbusts Ron As ahrays, co>flee and reficeshtnents find out details of events. Club annual event, so be sure to look for it fect stockJng-stuffer for your music of the Genesee Valley, Rochester For general queries about Dig- is a private weekend-long event will be avaihdirfc. For more infbrma- next year around National Coming Wbmen's t>oolc collection (and our first album) Custom Leathers, The Pride Con­ nity/Intcgrity, call the D/I Info-line which each year attracts one hun­ tjort contact Dale at 589-9107 or die Business Forum By the time November rolls around, Out Day. ^'Voices from thc Heart." nection, The Outreach Project, Dignity-integrity at 262-2170. group dred or more leadkermen from Fellowship via E-mail The Greater Rochester Gay and Les­ most classic cars have been "put to Spend an evening laughing, crying Next month will mark the two Salenas Mexican Restaurant, and This month IDignity-lntegrity will Have you always enjoyed reacfin^ aiound the VS. and Canada to a [email protected]. bian Business Forum would like to bed'* forwinter. But that doesn*t mean Getting out and singing with us as we recall the year anniversary of the Rochester RichKaza (theownerofpreakazoid) make a Book of Remembrance avail­ Have a favorite work of fiction you beautiful private campground on thank our members for their support auto enthusiasts can't start thinking Empire Bears best of years gone by,., and our hopes chapter of Frontrunners/ for their donations of money, prizes, able to the community at each ofour We're two support/sodal gtoups. would like to share? Interested in Seneca Lake. Thiotigbout die year in 1997. about next season. for the years to come. Concert tick­ Frontwalkers. Some of us srill re­ and food in honor ofthe first year of services. You arc welcome to enter One for men. One for women. We hearing what others would recom­ tiie Rams genciou^y dotiate time GRRRrtt! The Bears are progrsssii^ Through our membership we were For the Lambda Car Club Finger ets u-ill be available from RGMC member our first meet, in the snow Latino Mission. the name ofa friend or loved one. We meet every Tuesday for a free format mend? and money to numerous iocai chari­ diroi^ a busy fidi, foragii^ for ev­ able to provide various programs Lakes Chapter, now is the tittle to members, TicketMaster, and Ticket on a cold December morning, run- Our friend O] Hector provided a will remember and celebrate the lives discussion. Then join the women's book dis­ table oiganizations. ery morsd of goodness before a long, throughout the year from Financial hold elections and select the club*s Express. Season tickets, now ar­ ninguith BuffaJo Frontmnners who spicy mix of great dance tunes. The Getting Out plans two dinner cussion group and discover ail die ooid winter sets in- We've already had Planning to Work Place Issues. For officers for 1999. Accordingly, the of these people during the month of Staitif^ in December, thc Rams ranged for premium and general seat­ traveled here to support our inaugu­ "serving giris" were as delicious as events for this month. Wc will have other bookworms in Rochester. Call two pottuck Slippers, with mOte food the third year the Business Forum co- club will convene its fall planning November. and fhe Bachdor Forum wMi tie ing, are sdll available. For infotma­ ral meet. Since then, our member­ the food. A special thanks goes to a dinner on Nov. 2 at 7 p.m. For 442-8132 formore information. than we could eat- You can )om us at sponsored with the GAGV the Ptide This month only, D-I will hold enforcing a dtess code ONLY on meeting at the GAGV Community tion, please contact our Chorusline ship has grown and many have con­ Gcny Ulled, whose gifts of leader­ location, caii Kevin at 325-6745. thc next one, Saturday nigjbt, Nov. 21 Parade and Cultural Festival. And, of our potluclc dinner on the fourth Rams Bamight. Appropriate dress Center, 179 Adantic Ave. on Nov. at (716)423-0650 or us at (716)423- tributed to the organization's suc­ ship and vision made the evening On Nov. 20, the second dinner Rochester Rams at thc GAGV Community Center, course, for this year's Cultural Festi- Sunday, Nov. 22. Our theme is for Rams bamight is boots, jeans, T* 13, from 8 to 10 p.m. In addition ro 0267. cess. Friendships have been forged, possible. The food and friendship will take place, also at 7 p.m. Please The Rochester Rams would like to 179 Adantic Ave- val we cannot fotget our sponsors: Thanlcsgiving Dinner! Certainly our shirts, fetish wear and of course, providing a selection of harvest re­ and many good times have been were fantastic! Incidentally, every call the number above for informa­ personally thank everyone for sup­ We meet at 6:30^ and eat aiound 7 Calvert Gtoup Funds/Ame rican lives are not perfect and the w^orld dressing in die theme of that particu­ freshments, a photo contest will be shared. Thursday night is Gay Night at tion. porting our bamight and The Bach­ p.m. The dub piovides the bever­ Express Financial Advisors, Muther's Frontrunners/ we live in is not perfect* However, lar bamig^ Sneaiccrs, dress shoes, held to pick the best shots of 1998 We are very welcoming of new If you're dealingwith comingout, elor Forum. We would also like to Freakazoid. we do itave many things to be thank­ drag, dress slacics, sweaters and co­ ages and supplies. Any man who's 40 Union, Person to Person (Chris­ car-related events. So bring your thank those who participated in our Frontwalkers members, regardless of fitness level The people who attend Latino new to Rochestcr, or simply trying to logne ate not appropnate aod will interested in attendif^ can brix^ a tina Carol), Pride Connection, Roch­ nominations and photo entries, and ful for. Picase join us for dinner and run this year and look forward to Ifyou were up on Saturday mornings Please join us for fun runs and walks Mission are no strangers to gpod fon enlarge your circle of friends, our prevent you from joining us. We'd dish to pass. Friends, fun, &olk will ester Custom Leather, Southwedge win more than once. Formore infor­ bring a dish to share. D-I will pro­ seeing you again next for'*Basic Train­ Oct. 10, you might have seen the at 6 p.m. on Wednesdays and 8:30 and good friends. The group is for group could bc the answer. Guys call like to emphasi^e tiiatihts dress code ensue. Collision and Tim Tomkins. mation, call Rob at 225-0769. vide turkey and place settie^. ing *99!" Rochester Frontrunners/ a.m. on Saturdays; we start at the gay, lesbian, bisexual and Kevin at 32S-6'^4S. Ladies call Marge is onW in effect ONE N IGHTof the The Empire Bears hdd a wedtend D-I is a living fiiith conununity of Come and join us and other area gays, lesbians, bisexuals, transgender at 787-9254.

Geri Stanton Westminster Presbyterian First Universaiist Church r 150 Clinton Ave. Rochester Church 4th Annual Barbara Debes, MS. Jim Stetter Book Fair A MORE LIGHT congregation December 6th Noon to 2 p.m. • iesbian wftth 13 yean off where people of all sexual orientations N«w Books at Discounted pric«* experieace hi private pffscdoe EXPERIENCE YOU TRUS worship and miruster together W« are • Welcoming Congregation • Individual, Couple and mM, MS.Ed- Group Therapy National Certified Counselor • ^tedalizii^inCoQomisof: Certified Clinicai Mental Still located in Rochester's 19th Ward Heaitii Gounsd(H* rnKsstamMstTsmisirv^ IndHidiiaL P 216 Thurston Road 436-6200 545 Pai« Avenue <7I6)S71-4610 Reia&)n$hips, Sq)afatkm, fru^i< Sdf-Esteem, Abuse, s^ Vi^tiiMqpt 10:30 a.m. Sundays Dochester. New Yortt 14607 SBdfam Pee Scde Sexuai Orientation (Roman Catholic-Episcopal) TDD (716) 533-2041 __^ ''Healing is heft, and happiness tmd peace" „„_^ I VofC© (716) 325-7180 We wdcome all regardless of worship tradition

- - • ; • C.-' or sexual orientation. Third Fresbyterian rhurch Liturgy every Sunday at 5:00 p.m. 4 MaiatSteaatat Eait Avenue Social Hdur ar«MMd 6:90 p.m. Williaai A. Kelly, CSW ^^ 271.6513 AASECT Certified S«x ThaiVtat/S«|pcr«ter 'I \tgether we vnU create an Potluck DkBner every tiiird Sunday ofthe month. Carok J. Cmmp, RN, CSW, CAC JL etwironmetU ihat-promotes Church of ^ Litke aad ^ Simon Cyrrae AASECT Certified Sex ThcnitiM 17 Soslli Vltiiuish Street healing, provides suppttrt fttr exphmng (Comer of Broad Si and & Fitzhush St.) ^ RefartioiMhips/Faiiiay iMMs Phone 262^2170 ^ Aleelwl A Drug Reittbtd CoBcemf ytmr personal joumey and empowers <# Sexual FoBcUoaiag & Sexoal CoMpakhrity you to tticke sdf-respectktgthoices. This Eucharistic commumty exists- • mV^TD Rdated Issues m to worship God A M0i«Uilit Churdi • to proclaim the good news qf Jesus Christ 496 WUte Spruce Boulevard Rochcflcr, New York 14423 ,MS.Ed. Whar^ Gay, lasbiM and bisexual p«rtl|«rt welcomed as partrmrs in mlntstty • to witness to the reaUty of Christian gay, iesbian, bisexual, and transgender peqple (71^ 327-2121 Ka Sumiiy 10:30 AM Worship -] I't Indivkiual K'Jpnday IstandSfd 7:30 PM Gay/L«b«an«isajiual Support Group Join us in celebrating 23 years kjraMMtkcallfecare ChiW c»r» - Wheelchair accessible - Leaped for the haaringmpaired in our community!

-tTt'Ufctv^ w.iS«=-l*EC«8h..^^«Fj ^VM' tri' THE ^ il i» T ^ €%t% $% t BIS also be reached via mail at: The gay and leshian people througfiout tnuugendered Hispanics, although Rochester BF Society, P.O. Box 362, American history who attempted, UnBroken Hospital visiting everyone is welcome to join us. (We Cumberiand Station, Rochester, widi varying debtees of success, to Hospital Volunteers — Weiieedg;teat faste discrinunation.') Our goals in­ Threads N.Y., 14605. give voice to their authentic selves or This Thai^g^ving, give dianks ^th men and women wiSifig to visit tesi- clude lefttning about di^erent Issues to change die society in ^tiiich they 1 ^W. agratefiil heart fbr all ofyour creative dents of Montoe Conrnium^ Hos- of common interest, making ftiends GLSEN lived. Many thanks to Etic Libey and talents, and come a»ate a holiday in a supportive atmosphere, and so- GI5EN Rochestcris a chapter of the the teat ofthe Im^ Out volunteers cenfietpsece fbr yoiff fieftst table to We make a big d&^fexence in their dnliwng with one another in a spirit Gay, Lesbian atKi Sttai^t Education who made this program possible. dazzle all yodr fri^ids. ItvesI We meet dte gteatest people of cotmxK>n caring totd sharing. Network. Our goal is to assure that On Nov. 16 from 7-9 p.m., Come join us at our two Novem­ thete and have m lot of fun. This b a Thc gtoup meets on the second each tnember of every school com­ GLSEN Rochester ^H^ present a ber Monday meetis^^ held Novv2 gteat way to give bAck, and also to and fburth Thursdays ofeach month munity is valued and respected, re­ panel discusston entided '*ln or Out: and Nov. 16» fix>m 7 to 9 p.m. at the bting credibilhy to our gay commu­ at tfte GAGV Community Center, gatdless of sexual orientation. We What's It All About?** Local mem­ GAGV, 179 Adantic Ave. Bdng a niiy. 179 Adantic Ave., from 7 to 9pjn. If wdcome as members any individual, bers ofour school communities who new or current ptoject and )oin in the Join us on Hiuisday aftetnooas, you want further information, write regatdless of sexual orientation or are in vatious stages of conung out at funl For further infbtmationf con­ or anytime diat accommodates your to Latino Mission, P.O. BOX 20510, occupation, who is committed to see­ school will shaxe ^cir stri^gles, strat­ 1S4 Wellington tact Kett7» facilitator, at 865-6761, schedule. For more itifetmation, call FRANK RUSSO 21 Parkview Rochester, N.Y. 14602-0510, or just ing this philosophy tealized in K-12 egies and successes, and will field or e-mail Kerry at Donna Marie at (716)442-6399. * Gteat dQr doubk * Bring offers Associate - Broker * Magnificent Dutdi Qdonial on DoiMe tot show up at our next meeting. We wiil Schools. questions from the audience. The "[email protected]". See you * Character * Updated kitchens * 2 Bdrm uxsits Refer with Confidence * 4 finished floorsno t inchiding attic * 4/5 bdm^ be glad to see you and say The tt^c and brutal killit^ of event will take place at the GAGV there! '^Open fhmt porch and second OOOT balcony "Bienvenido amigo" to you. Matthew Shepard illustrates a hard Community Center, 179 Atiantic PLAGAL 389-1033 * 2 111 baths * 2 staircases * Sdarium '*' Shows gteat * One look and will be sold * Billiard room * OflSce/Lttnaiy truth about the education system here Ave. PLAGAL (Pro-Ufc Alliance forGays Butch-Fennme Women's Hiidng * Lots of charm ^ Call for more d^aiis * * Finished low<^ level with huge batbiocmi in America. Our schools did nothing If you would like more infotma­ Women's Hiking is going strong af­ and Lesbians) local chapter Vice- to prepare the murderers of Mat­ * & log room >* Security * Ifigh Ceilings* The Rochester Butch/Femme Soci­ tion about GLSEN, write to GLSEN ter two and a half years. Mothers with President is Dorma Marie Kearney, * Plos much nuHe * Call for Details * ety is alive, well and growingl Our thew to respect, understand and value Rochester, P.O. Box 10798,Rochc3- their childrcn arc always welcome. RO, Box 10035, Rochester, N.Y., #1 Offtoa hn Rochaaiari 4QQfO¥aB>raat,PiBa>md,HY 14834 October meeting went splendidly, the LGBT peopie who live among ter. N.Y. 14610-0798, call Jeff Ix>ng Our hikes are definiteiy exdtii^ and 14610. Call (716) 442 6399 formore them. .At our Sept. 21 meeting, a and we thank all of you for attending at 271-4937, or e-mail at a iot of fun. Always new women infomiation about meeting times. The * Buying or Selling a Portion of Every Transaction goes to either Aids Rochester or the G^ Alliance and sharing some very unique items showing of the film "Its Elemen­ longjj@homiaiLcom. Check out the pining us. We travel to various re* national address is: PLAGAL Na­ and experiences with us! Our No­ tary" gave attendees the opportunity GLSEN website at www.glsen.otg. gional parks. This is a great way to tional, P.O. Box 33292, Washington, vember poduck gathering will be a to see school communities where Join us with your dollars and your meet exceptional ladies. For more D.C. 20033. Telephone: (202)223- Butch & Femme Trivial Pursuit elementary and middle school stu­ efforts as we work to make our local information, call Donna or Chris at 6697. Night! Bring a dish to pass, your dents are indeed learning about school communities a safer place for (716)442-6399. butch/femme self, and your knowl­ LGBT people, and by doing so pro­ all. edge of butch Sc femme lore and life! viditig a ray of hope that education Due to a surge in ourgroup's mem­ can dilute bigotry and hatted. bership, we are in the process of On Oct. 18, the Image Out Roch­ The Etnpty Closet is available at: the G«nesee Co^p, Vlll^e* finding a new^ location for our ester Lesbian and Gay Film Festival Green. Silkwood Books, Muthers, Open Arms MCC, Avenue *s. monthly meetings. For the precise and GLSEN Rochester co-presented Pub, Big Apple Cale, Tivoli, Lakeshore Records, The Cre­ date and location of our November the film "Out of thc Past" as the first ators' HatMJs, Top Notch, Record Archhfe, Bames 9k Noble, poduck event, please contact Kerry of four film programs addressed to Borders, New Voyage Bookstore, Rochester Custom at 865-6761. A mailing with the LGBT youth. The film tells the story 85% ofmy business is referral-based! Leather, the Bachek>r Forum, AIDS Rochester, Java, information will be sent out once a of Kelli Peterson and her stmggle to SAVE YOUR WINDOWS Anthony's 522, Club Marcella, Tara, Worklwkle News, the location is acquired. Thanks for your create a Gay/Straight Alliance in the Rochester Spa and Body Club, Eastman School of Music patience, and we look forward to face of a homophobic school board \ Is the dassic took of your home seeing you all again, and mectii^ yet and state legislature. Interspersed Bookstore, Common Ground, the PHde Connection, the ^N\ important to you? more newcomers! The Society can with her story are the tales of several MOCHA Project, Community Health Network, Slice of Life That's 100% Cafe, Cheesy Eddie's and many other places around town! Do you want to increase the efficiency of your windows? Satisfaction! % Let us show you what the Bi-Glass System can do uncord Archive for your home. be so' It's ttie smart Altemattve »•] Mark Siwiec nice to' to Repfacsmant! i ^^^^ ^sed music ^^ 244-6500,ext. 158 e-mail: [email protected]

Window Renewal Inc. 716-225-7510 www.tji-glass.com Lowenguth Realty, Ltd. 2799 Monroe Avenue FcKged gUiss tvindow & door repuKreitvmt done on premises. Office: 244-6500 Fax: 244-4031

«« '-'^^'>^»:J> "V FREE ///r////i'?/-fW,99eieivdav Edith H. Bernstein, C.S.W. Personal Safety Workshop WMrws.1 rf^l^^A m. Wope Auenue -i73 3820 Expeillselil $«# image, problem resolution, coiJple commuriication For Teen Women & Women <716)427-0960 Who Care About Them 2467 i. Or call 254-9709 DR. PAULA DECHELLY 473-3050 PSYCHOTHERAPIST CABIN TO CASTLE Reduce cnme nsk* Leam to ftfcoimize and avoid potetthally ianuerous iimanons Thjs workshop is tbr women - lecni jnd okler No phy^al CaipentryAAttoaiy contact IS invoNed. The tbcus is jn mental skjlls PreeEsttautes Facilitators Jrom Ae«s 'Jtsmute ot Rochester. NV CHUCK CURTIS (716)766-5138 4 PM- 10 PM -GAY-FRIENIXJy" Spoibured by: W«c»«s Afaiast a M«ic«t CattirMiBMM aa4 Ite OcBMcc SCMIMMM ni r. r

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(3(M5)who'satop!#95 B{WM b4Nly bofldcr, Do yoo dotre to rqperi* town United PiertiyWaian Church, [email protected] Sincere man in search of that BiWM 40, ISO sa»c for Bl B American F, 26, attractive African Ameri­ #480 Itai£anM,38,6*0M9S ¥try mtiscislafv straight imce hypnotic sulnBis- 121N. BsifeH^ St; Feee. 334-2989; applicant*s character and qualifica­ HELPWANTED ultimate someone that's down to can F for discreet, fun, A daytime cptfawnlCTm, Dis­ sioB A sensual faniasy very open miikded, ISO SBfWM 47, d « d free, IhSn ISO TSnV/CD s for acting, very good looking, tions. Forinformation call (212)353- cretion assured! #342 with another M purely for ^5*7271. Food psogram manager. Related earth, open minded and seeks lasting new friends. My summer hot conversation. Give me ISO smooth A feminine hot times tn the Rochester eiyoys vid<^; ISO very has been kind of boring: I acall! #969 Masculine GWM, 42, area. Ptease leave a name mmcuiar M's! #297 pleasure? Live out your Jttdldnl intemahips. A $3,000 AAS degree preferred. Two years friendship/relationship. I'm 6*5' discreet, in good shape, BiM's age unimportant, haven't found anyone that must have agood head on & number in my box and fantasy! #1172 stipend will be awarded to a quali­ 295 lbs., tail, handsotne, will respond F 28, 5*6*% caramel works out regularly; ISO GWM 43, real cute, tm Lesbian arid Gay Stcpfiunoiliea. food preparation, menu plannif^ and I can hang out with & have brown skin, brown eyes, their shoulders, A no gatne I'll get back to you! #965 other G/BiM *s (30-42) food jobv have no time for BIWM wanted by very fied lawsta^ent to support 10-week I am looking for participants for my ordering experience required. Super­ to all. Bemard L. Gaston #A150- agood time. So. call ifyou very caring, compassion­ players for afternoon/ bars. garb^ige, A whatever, attractive WC in their who are also i n 0ood sltape Father figure, firm, sumtner judicial internship in New 217, PO Box 5500 Dorm F2, feel the same! #1177 ate. A new to Rochester eveningcncounteTs!#369 gentIc, talented, caring, ISO a real guy (40*5). No 40's. Are yoa willing to study on the lesbian and gay vision experience preferred. $21,755. area; ISOnrtasculmeGPs A work out! #138 WOMEN Bi-curious SWF, 19, mu­ Very good iooking successful, giving, funny, locort need apply! #226 please us ? Trim, endowed, Yot^ City under die auspices of dte stepfamily system - that is families Resumes AIDS Rochester. EOE. Chillicothe OH 45601. (26+) S'?" or taller who sician, likes dancing, GWM 31« 6W\ 150 tts^ BfWM, 35, ISO Bi/GM's distinguished. CWM. ISO Mature BIM,50, ISOBi/ A good looking is a must MWBiF5*l**,pvtitciiic- are cari ng. gi ving. A com- Lesbian and wn, Just look- folks only need call. Indoor cats are talce ttie 5rst chance. I need age unimportant rhat I can encounters A threesome for weekday daytime fun! the Brockport/LcRoy sageASAPr #»01 tngto increase my circle of ences upon request. Please call Linny, a special one to fulfill my chill A hang out with for with my boyfriend. I love #618 area! #568 WM 21, queer ccono friends; ISO mature 482-9178. welcome. $235 per month plus utili­ LT friendship. Leave me a to watch A be watched! needs and Tm ready & See my photo on thc web Open minded MBiWM, clast, light smoker A BiAGM's for friendship, message! #H73 #1466 Residential plowing. 24 hour ties. 442-4133. wiiiingto please! #1123 WTV's5'9M70lbs*,A by fax or mail Check out ISOdaytime fun A fantasy drinker, into wandering fun times, A rmitual sup­ port. Not into anything SWBiF 25, tuU figured, SBF27, 5'0", 165 lbs., GWPF 37, active A at­ 5*9", 130 Ibs^ one domi­ the strangest story you will fulfillment! #229 aimlessly, causing trouble, service, cellular response, reasonable Westside City. Third person 224-8182. nant A one submissive; and creative, passionate crazy or kinky! #360 vcry aggressive, lilce my short A plump in the right tractive, ISO same for in­ ever hear. Wanna bet? Bi-curious MWM, 38, rates. Contracts available. CaU sought for three-bedroom apart­ Room for rent. Culver Rd. Non- hands on my mate at all places, open minded, A telligent conversation, ISO M's (30-45) for dis­ #1052 ISO other bi-curious sex! #593 MWM 40*8, new to bi, George, (716)966-1657;evenings af­ ment. $200 plus one-third utiUties. smoker, must Uke cats. Laundry, times, ISO someone who very loving; ISO B/H/WF stimulating adventures A creet, hot. adult fun. Com­ Open minded, very Bi- WM's who might be inter­ Attractive MWM, 33, ISOwcll endowed Bi/CM mon guys walk the wild piays thc maie role and (25-35) to buiid a friend­ poienti^il romantic en- curicus DWM, safe, dis­ ested in daytime encoun­ 5'IOM70lbs^ ISOsame forjaytimefun! #^99 ter 6 pm, 235-1635. 271-0541. cable, private phone line, off-street liiccs to have a good tirnc ship with A from there Counters. Whataboutyou'^ side! #798 creet, expects Ihe same; ters involving adult films! for discreet encouniers! Bi-curious WM, 30, LSO Ongoing therapy group for les­ FOR RENT parking, $235 plus security. 654-9713. 1? for a serious relationship! have an even more special #918 GWM 25, 6'4", stocky ISO C's and select S's to #203 #572 C (25-35) for first time #99 relationship. #1454 bian couples is now fonning. Call Westside City, two-bedroom first U of R area. Single family home Hot, extremely wild, build, ISO other M's out explore adult fantasies! Two young, attractive, Very»exyGMC,4Sto50, encoutiier. Disease free A Attractive GBF, 33, MC ISO Ffor first time, WC, ISO BiF who loves to there that ore commitment #1017 singic Italian boys, 5'6", handsome A i n great discreet! _ #1133 Dr. Paula deChelly, 473-3050. for floor apartment. $390 plus'utilities. for rent. Three bedrooms, fireplace, minded, d A d free, and n/ pbysically fit,d & d free, new adventures. Must be rock A roll all night and Mature GPM, ISO G/ l40lbs.,A5'10M65lbs.. shape; ISO younger good Attractive bear ISO ver­ information. 235-6385. dining room, large kitchen. Private ISO feminine B/H/WGF d A d free, and discreet. party every day! #1091 s like myself. Race A age BiM {25-50) for friend­ both in gz^at shape, good looiung M's for playtime' satile, well hung M's! is not an issue! #388 PERSONALS Halfhouse, three bedrooms, yard, drive with garage. Call 889-2235. no games, Bi*s, or C's. #730 WC ISO F to fulfill my ship and intimate encoun­ looking. A wondeiful; ISO #552 #1112 porch, laundry hook-ups, hardwood Must be sincere, honest. & SGBF 30, feminine, pe­ husbands fantasy. Not BiM 48, 6M", 240 lbs., ters. Race unimportant. a third person! #186 Bi-curious MWM, 5'9", Submissive WCD, ISO The following prisoners are $750 plus deposit, serious inquiries physically nt! #234 tite, enjoys having fun A looking for Bisexual en- ISO younger G/BiM sub­ .___ #895 Athletk BiWM, 36, ISO 165 ihs., good looking, dominants foi fantasy ful­ lonely and would appreciate hear- floots. $650 plus. Available Dec. 1. only with references. MWF 5*OMiOlbs^ pe­ laid back times; ISOfemi- counter. *2?2_ missive for discreet fun MBiWM 45, ISO G/BiM slender to medium build athletic, d A d free; ISO fillment. Age, race unim­ tite, ISO first bisexual ex­ nincGbF(25+)forfriend- BiF23, 5'4", 100 lbs., i^mes| #322 for mutual enjoyment A dominant WM or C with Bi-curious M for first tims portant but discretion is! perience. Must be d & d ship. possibly more. #239 long brown/hazel, ISO Bi/ Variety is thc spice of fantasy fulfillment during BiM for mutually satisfy­ experience at your place I #779^ ffce, very discreet. & age is BIWF24,5'r%200lbs^ GF who's very caring, Hfe! MBiWM 45. SSO the early n[K>ming or eariy ing experiences! DAd #181 WM 23, vcry good took­ unimponant! #650 blond hair A cute, ISO in- compassionate A honest daytitne action. #630 afiemoon! #655 free only. #1222 ing, nice person, easy to for companionship. Must MBiWM 45, ISO C for Young PC, ISO futfiUing telligentPfor discreet, fun BiWM 35, brown/ ISO someone to spend get along with, shy. A new be n/s. d A d free. #485 WM good looking, shy, eariy moming/eariy after- fantaty with bi-curious friendship this summer! brown, muscular baHd, some time and enjoy my nice body, clean, disease noon, weekday encoun- to this stuff: ISO rich, older SWF (2(Veariy 30's) #1378 F25,5'10",240 lbs., out­ ISO other Bi/GM's for fun life with. So, take achance free, sexy, homy, ready. A lets! #987, gentleman wbo wants to #1622 B&HF 5'9*% ISO F^s for going, ISO F for new expe­ times! #425 Agive meacall! #544 new to this; looking to be spoil A fondle me. rience A discreet relation­ MBiWM 45, ISO femi­ played with. I like my body Looking fbr some MEET ROCHESTER MEN! Vcry dkcrect F ISO de­ new friendships, maybe MBiWM 45, ISO other excitement! #709 creet F(25-i') for pleasures more! Ifyou'd like to talk ship. Leave a message in nine, small flramcd, GM Bi/G fcroinixkeM forcariy touciied A massaged! Agood times! #1330 to me leave a message. my box. #687 for early morning/early moming/early aftemoon #804 ...on MasterDate, Rochesters original way to have fun on tha Bi-oirMMtsSWT,20,Is6 #1046 F 23, 5*4*'. blond/hazel, afternoon, weekday en- weekday encounter! #383 MWM 39,5*7**, 165 Ite^ counters! #900 phone! 3rowse, chat, match aryd ever] meet hundreds of Great aDe(!ierF(20-25)forfan- F 27,5*9", 240 ll»^ iong ISO W/Ualian SF (20-25) GWM39,dAdfhiee.&u] bload/biue, attractive. A tasy fulfillment. Must bed blond/blue, with fair skin. for friendship, possible GWM 42,5^", 175 Ihs., loving, energetic, has var­ clean cut; ISO same for <5ijy© right here in tbe Rocester areal Fhvate. dlecreet and tone of Adfrec. #1134 ISO full figured, top relationship. #2180 sort of short, well built, ied interests; ISO someone aftemoon fun. Preppy k>ok BF 27,140 tbs^ very at­ heavy, disease free, BiF ISO F's that are aHicu- stocky, healthy, drug A about thc same age who is is a plus! #682 funl H y. we even offer a feature that will confidentially call your drink free; ESOdiscreet M tractive, from Buffalo (under 30) who can travel late, into physical fitness, interested in friendship Straight WM, 26, nice area, ISO other attractive to Bath NY, #1038 intelligent, mature A dis­ of similar age or younger developing into a relation­ home if someone wants to chat. Cali -436-6253 teday for your for good times! #890 looking gvy, nice bodyv F's (24-34) who weigh Dominant F ISO creet. Ifyou are that perwn ship down the road. ISO horny, likes to be nuks- *FJ^E Trial Membership. Once youVe given ue a try. ifyou like the around 120-155 lbs., for submiMives foreducation picasccall! #2853 If you Bfcc oU rubs & mel­ someone toshare life with! saged A played wifh: ISO #280 encounters. possibly A training in alternative SBFeariy 30'«,scxy, nice low times just let mc new adventures I Leave me system (and you will!), give us a call at 404-OOOO to become a more! #1464 know! jWn a message. #591 lifestyles. #66 hxAing; ISOFofany age. BiWM 27, 5*11", 195 member Package prices start at just 27ext door type (35-50) for serious dating. GF for hanging out.. for fantasy fulfillment! maybe more! #32 friend; ISO hot lady to possible LTR. Serious Use Free Code: 9009 spice up my life! #2824 #222 only A no games! #435

• Cai 413^3333 PlielngBnadiiidr«oeMi0yourvoic8boxl8a«iy1OO% •Call t71-«77 ($2.49 per minute) Can't ci« «rt*9ffm Tlw aulomaM and kilaiyfrool You never spoak to anyorw. arxJ you nevor reveal your idoritity. not even to usf Yotif ad will be placed in mult^ newspapers aiound the area at no charge. •There ia WO CHARGE for you to Hateateywirwiaeiagee. you tmttt cafl 436-333^ •You create three sepearate recordings to help entice people to respond to you. to retrieve your messages free. 1) A roconjing for a 20 word ad that gets published in Empty Closet, The One. Swap Sheet, r^ •To find out about how to purchase spedafly prkied packagee. ptaM cal 4^^ Out and Ffeetinw. credH cards as i#eB as WBStemUnk)n Quick CoiMarriekwIronkschec^ 1' -^^^ 2) A Scan tKix graettng that allows you k) tefl about yourself and can be heard by callers the veiy on your k)ng distance, you can stifl use our system. Charges apply to 540 ml 900 nuri^ sameday. •In addition to the ads pubfehed In the paper, OMh advMaer i^oords a ScM box yoel^ 3) A Voice Box greeting which aflows you to ask the caller for informatk)n you want to know about you to scan the latest mads before the atf aduiiygelBputMted. Scan booc gives you ajump on the them. One FRO* caM does it afll ccmpetitkyi and beats newspaper delayst •AN messages are screened before being placed on the systom. Any questkyw or comments, ploaee •Comnfients or questtons cafl 464^MD. Mooday4^«day. cafl 464-0000. Monday-Friday d:30 am - 6:00pm. We encouraged you to use cur aulom^ed help system. V "^4L';.-:tV. •You must have a corded touch-lone phone and the* and # buttonsmust befuncfional. !l mEEkr-J Origin, 20 Cairn St Rocliester, New York 464*0000 • '?«*'^.:* •» rW^ rf. •:••';:"•'•A:''- "T^

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classified ads, letters to editor^ ad 28s-875«. . • :; space reservation, non-cam«ra-ready Toto ads. 244-9030. unwopped ONGOING COAP little movie ni^it. 7 pm. fieediinL Nov. 19: Movfngour Agenda fnto Frank, 720-9876. SUNDAY Thn**ditfl^5i30-^ pOi, cash bar. tha 2l$t Century. A town m««cing G1.SEN libciMtioii. "In or Out: Mote G«lli»y (^ M^tmisl Art Gal- 7:15 pn^lfcndiys, Ckw>erLiOts, iecK.506ihl|iv««Mi^ Ave. 234-8706. sponsored by ESPA. GAGV, Log What's It AU About?** 7-9 pm, forgayandlesfaau 275OM0afoe A^ Kl-2a7S. Cabin Rvpubttcans, Rainbow Demo­ GAGV Community Centet, 179 At­ ftiends, 12:15 pfiB»liMd;; COAP Dowmown Unhaed Pimfayteiian {lin^ diiiit:itn«sd^ 5:30-7 pm, crats. lanric Ave, 271-4937. Come Out and M^. S^pinetS' Meet* EkAmMtOioccse Hcmse, 935 East Ohstt^ 121 N. Htzbt^ &. 271- meeting last MoodaySj, 7 pm^ ;~ TUESDAY 17 infe seoond Wednesdiq^ 7 pm, 4in t€OB» GAGV Commuatty Ccniei; 179 At­ J-^ Adandc Ave. 244-8640. CMeMts RaizibGW Feilowsh^. AMMtt snd Ftiends lantic Ave, Tom ML, 454-3609, • David Buder. HaUwaUs, Tri-Main CayAlcohoifae>AiMin|iiiiOM« Seoood and fourth Thutadsjrs, • Talk byjohn Aceto, Strong Memo­ of iMiiians nnd Gfl^s (PFLAG) Ametican osytjata Gnncntnnd Center, Main St., Buffalo. Theatre: 7ntn,UniiatiaaChiadv2a0 WkMcxt GAGVCommitfiity Cenn, 179 At­ •OH iHl inWlv! I I. MONIH Ol NoM \iBi:R rial Hospital AIDS Vaccine Research 2:%-5 poa, Feiends hfeetti^ Third Mondays, 7t30 pen. Vdmet Beta. Qub MarceUa Buffalo. 8 pm. ^HkMite, 41 WcstBunsier. Last Sua- Rd landc Ave.,7 pm. OA jetty, 442- program, 7 pm. For location caU Dale House, 57 Ambrose St 442-5486. 2220. SUNDAY I Center, Main St., Buffalo. Co-spon­ different nights. 7:30 pm. For loca­ Also Nov. 15, Nov. 20, Nov. 22. «%;^4^156 Unbroken Tbffcnds S«q>poft Gtoli|> for PMcnta at 589-9107. Who Hanre Xjost CadUcm Haflwalla Ways in Being Gay sored by SHADES. tion of Nov. 8 meeting, caU 546- Lambda Car Club. FaU planning I%niii^-Itt«csKity First, third Mondays, 7-9 pm» THURSDAY 19 5 pm, St Luke's/St Simon Cytene Fkst, dtkird WeBlkfaB^«B6«Jlaawift»,l^ Bassically Tfeblemakers Band Gaybingo Gay/Lesbian Al-Anon G^y Lesbian, INsexual. Every Mc^xlay, 6:45-8:45 pna, HallwaUs Ways in Being Gay SATURDAY 14 Empty Closet deadline. Photo­ Main Cei^ci; Moa St^ B^^Edo. Third Wednesdays, 7 pm. School First Unitarian Church, 220 S. (716)396-1370. Auction (donations appreciated). artd I^iends Assodattcm Schotrf #12, South Ave. opposite graphs, camera-ready ads. 244-9030. HOMSlAirM of die Arts. $5. Call AIDS Roches­ Winton Rd- 7 pm. Bany Lynn. Executive Director Music by Bob Staubing and Old Guys Festival. Video: Appat^nt Trap by HaUwaUs Ways in Being Gay (GIBFA) Highland HostntaL 242-0237. HaUwaUs Ways in Being Gay ter, 442-2220. Rochester Ranks bar nigfat Third JuUe Zando. HallwaUs, Tri-Main Festival. Videos/performance: Tdsfl^ TsSc Nm Iha KMV U* of Rodiester. Sundays, 5 pm, TUESDAY of Americans for Separation of with Glasses. (315)483-2233. Empire Bears Saturday- 8 pm-2 am. Bachelor Fo­ Festival. FUm: Haikl/tjablRonAthey: Omttfiki Chatt WbatAk0tti^Best0f Morey 401. 275-9379. E-maU: Rochester Gaiy Men's Chorus Church and State speaking on "The HallwaUs Ways in Being Gay Center, Main St., Buffalo. 7:30 pm. Zachary L^ngboy presents videos First Wednesdays, 7;.30 pm, tum, 470 Uaiverstty Ave. 271 -6930. a Story of Deliverance by Catherine gib [email protected] ter.edu Downtown United Presbyterian ReUgious Right—Radically Wrong." Festival. Film: TTje Brandon Teena TUESDAY 10 by aboriginal artists and his own the HtHtsti by Linda Handd. Discus­ GAGV Community Center, 179 LikM: Rainbow Alliance for tfae Saalfjeld. U. Buffalo screening room, GAGV Lesbian Gay Bi Youth Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh St 7-9:30 7:30 pm, Downtown United Presby­ Story, by Susan Greta Olafsdottir. COAP ice skating. Brian, 442- video/performance work. 8 pm, sion leader, l^sud ^rlnetta^ CSW, 7- Atlantic Ave. I>eaf 8 pm. Performance: Naked Stones, Gfoufy pm. 423-0650. terian Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh St. HaUwaUs, Tri-Main Center, Main St., 2156. HaUwaUs, Tri-Main Center, Main St., 8:30 pm, Boidecs Book* & Music. Ages 14-21, Every Sunday, 2-4 pm, THURSDAY Second Samrdays, 7 ptn. Gay AUi­ Fully ClotJbed\inth Richard Lambert, Gay Alcoholics Anonymous Presbyterians foir Lesbian ance, 179 Adantic Ave. Write PO 225-7271; 334-2989. Free. Buffalo. 8 om. Also shown at Salon WEDNESDAY i t Buffalo. Free. Co-^mvDKcdhy GAGV. GAGV Conununity Center, 179 8 pm, Genesee Hospital, 244 Ron Ehmke, Craig Centric, BiU Tho­ Adantic Ave. 244-8640. and Gsy Concerns Bbx 20093, Rochester NY 14618. Halhsralls Ways in Being Gay Q Spot Coffee, 6 pm on Nov. 12. COAP at Freakazoid. 11 pm, SUNDAY 15 TUESCMTnW* i Alexander St Lambda Heahb Sciences mas and David Butier, New Phoenix Rainbow Amateur Radio Aasoc. 6:30 pm, first Thursday. For loca­ Festival. Marci Blackman, San Fran­ SUNDAY 8 Chris, 493-7001. COAP brunch with Dave. Noon. Hall will Wia^ in Bdfang Gsy Finger Lakes Gay/Lesbian Sup­ tion caU Ralph. 271-7649. Sixth Saturdays, dinner/ineeting. Theatre, 8 pm. Also Nov. 21. Finger Lakes chapter. port Gcoi^ cisco African American lesbian au­ Interweave of First Unitarian FRIDAY 13 265-3186. FesdFsL Just B«if£do pfc9eats pby­ Business meerit^/lunch. CaU Bob, Rocbester Freedom Singeta CaU Steve, 271-8719. SATURDAY 21 Third Tuesdays, first Fridays. Ffontfurmets/Fr ontw aUcers thor, reads from her new book Po' Universalist Church, Rochester. HaUwaUs Ways in Being Gay MONDAY 16 wright Tony KUAHBDHSI; interviewed 442-7185. Mixed chorus. Rehearsab 7 pnt. Write VO Box 941, Geneva NY 8:30 am run/walk. Meet Geotge Festival. Art opening: Falling by Bmpty Closet deadline. Articles, COAP nite out. 10 pm. Dave, by Loma C HiB and Ron Ehmke. Rochester Rc-Hab Center. 334- Maft, 7:30 pm at HallwaUs, Tri-Main Monthly meetings wUl now be on Women's Dinmniing Cirde 14456, or caU (315)536-7753, ask 8617. Eastman House parkif^ lot 461- Rockwell Hatt, 7 pm. First Sundays, GAGV Commuoity for Sam Edwards. Mercy Spiritual Con^Hmion 4246. FRIDAY DSC 4 Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. Noon- 2 Atlantic Five 0 Coalidon for Lesbian Visibility pm. Rose, 865-3906. Gay men 50 and over. Second Hattwalls Wa^ft in Being Gay Evening of reflection for those im­ Second Sarurdays. Finger Lakes HOMUMY Tuesdays, 7:30 pm, GAGV Com­ area, poducks/socials. CaU Becky Featrral. Film: th Prafiitedis by Gary and Lesbian Stqspott munity Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. pacted by HIV/AIDS. 7-9 pm. Triangle Talk CaU 671-6070 or 473-6893. Bly, (315)539-6271. Lawrence Brose. HafiwaUs^ Tri-Main 461-0821. Group Women's basketball Tranagender Organization Ihitd J^pesbyterian Chutch, 4 Meigs GettingOut Pnseaied by Borden OHI Hm BMSV Center, Main St, Bu&lo. 8 prti^. Thursdays and Mondays, 7-9 ptn. Second and fourth Saturdays, 2-5 % SATURDAY DEC S St First and thitd Mondays, 7:30-9 Support/sociaJ group. Every Tues­ Downtown United Presbyterian pm, GAGV Community Center, ™, 271-6513. day, 7-9 pm. Kevin, 227-6675; Church. 121 N. Fitzhugh St 7-9 179 Altnatic Ave. 442-2425; http:/ Rocster Wosaen^s Commu­ Wmnen^s basketball Marge, 787-9254. nity €3ionw« Singing in the Season, pm. Ramona, 244-1640. / www.samashcr.com/'^perette WkoiMmooi tbtt Xttt ti wkB Monday and Thursday nights, 7-9 Men Grieving Men St. Mlaiy's Connection Euchre Night 8 pm. Calvary St. Andrews Church, ptn. Downtown United Presbyte­ First third and fifth (if any) Tues­ For gays and lesbians, famiUes and Open Atms MCC, 175 Norris 95 AveriU Ave. Tickets $10 regular, rian Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh St days, CHN, 758 South Ave. 7-8:30 friends. Third Thursdays, 7-8:30 Drive. First Samrdays, 6 pm. 271- $8 students/seniors^ $5 children 12 7-9 pm. Ramona, 244-1640. pm. 787-8351; 244-9000. pm, 15 St Mary's Place (near 8478- After AIDS Beieaveooent S«^3poct Orleans Rainbow Fellowship and under. GEVA.) 454-4573. Hmpite Bears Second, fburth Mondays, 4-5:30 Support/social group, meets third .Greater Rocbester Gay and Pwrf ViMfli^ CSW Crystal BaO. Transgender hoU­ Foraging at the Forum. Second pm. AIDS Rochester, 1350 Uni­ Tuesdays, 7 pm. Fot location caU Lesbian Business Forum Saturdays, Bachelor Forum, 470 TrIongI* Talk, an InfdmMil discussion M^Hos focusing on books day celebration, Owego Treadway versity Ave. Free. 442-2220. Dale, 589-9107, or e-maU ond Issuos of portlcular iW|orost to tho/goy, losblan, ond blsoanral Professionals' social group. Second University Ave. Beariine: 234- Inn, 7 pm. Sponsored by STG Rochester Historical Bowling DLAubacl [email protected] 3381. community* Is hoid ot Bordws tho UM Mondoy of ovory month. (Southern Tier GiHs). E-mail Ait ovonts oro froo^nrfopon to tho public [email protected] CONE IMSIDE. Martiui M. Howden, CSW, CASAC BOOKS, MUSIC, VI9E0. AND k CAfE . Books (71«) 292*5900 Music (71«} 292-0070 496 White Spnice Blvd 1000 Hylan Drivo, Rochostor ii«i^if & Used C«ir Rochester, New York ^ire^ X

•^•i -' * HANDLING Anxiety • I>qpre«si«B • AlciAoi • Stress • Grief nefaitioMhip •» Fauiiy Pais •» ileetlficstioe Worfc THE HOLIDAYS Htriotnqiic Bmdnvorfc SpedmUw^tH Wmrk With tndtridiuUs mmd Ftumma tm ttu Cmmimg Out Process Frank Barone and Marilyna Upshutz, two area therapists with individuai pmctices. wiit explore the unique issues that arise for .^•^fx^ 3{Lk^'CHxl 6ooUtf, ctrvd Clx>rx»j* yT^cwubcng. gay. lesbian, bisexual and transgender peopie r when celebrating the hotideys. iPbzzulo Ms. Ed TARA missowr. nu>. .,. :-.> p^^u«.f-. $10 WEDNESDAY; NOVEIieERllO Af TPM Ck>unselor for all '• c Scudcrvc/Scnfof-: $S GAGV Convnunity CMitor, 179 Altanite Aw*. motional concems BMMfpOO AVmUK OKtL^re*> 12 Sc yowwocr: $5 Sign ItnguiQs inisipfsitfs Mslibis i^on isqusflt ual and couple therapy WMkt noios-€si 244-SS40.

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NOVEMBER 1998

Election Day TEADANCE Football Freaks SLOW JAMS V.LP. HUMP NrTE! LADSCSNnE Mel's NETE OUB NITE I TWilltc T* Dance FREE PIZZA! 2 fori Show your card-enjoy 1 hour 1rt&3n^ Thursdays 2«br1 Dance Your As OfF 7pm-1afn $1.50 RoHing Rocks Soft Misic for Quiet open bar 1130pm-12:30afn $1.50 Mich Utes Wdl and Domestic 10pn»^3am Get TogelticfS ao's&sasft^i $1.50 Wdt ^^Mfta DILen 2for1 Wdl/Dom 3 TVs DJ Henry OJ Sammy Rock and Aitemative 10pm-2am 9mH2am DJJay Tpm-Zam oi Damian Spinning tn Sam

8 veterans Oay 11 12 FfMayt^iath 13 ASpcdafStww 14 Foo^Mll Freaks SLOW JAMS VJ.P. HUMP NfTEl AOLPbrty MM'S NITE The Reigning FREE PIZZA ! 2 fori Show your canl-cftjoy 1 hour Hfeor yotir user mj/ne 2fbr1 Mas Mother's ^ After tiie^lww 12:30am Wdl and Domestic ao^ASorsMixi gctyour IstDrittkFREE Cot^suela 3TVs Oct Togethcrs DJDandan 10pni--nii(lnight with spedtti guests! peff^jriittee by Rock and AHemative 10pm-2am DJ Henry OlJay 'Miss B«rnadette- 7pm-2afn Spinning in 3am 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 1 TEADANCE f=dotball FreaScs SLOW JAMS VXP. HUMP NHEI LADIES NITE MerSNTTE OUeMTE ^ Twitite T" Dance FREE PIZZA I 2for1 Shewymrcaftf-enjoyi hoor 1** & 3^ Thursdays 2for1 Danoe Ybur Ass OfF Soft Music for (Met open bar 1i:30pm'12:30am $1.50 Mich Utes 7pm-1am $1.50 Rolling Rocks 80*sA9tfsMb£l Wdl and Domestic 10pm«'3am oet Togethen $150Wdl\AMttca DJLen 2fori Wdl/Dom 3TVs DJ Henry lOpm-midnight DJ Sammy Rock and Aitemative 10pm-2am 9pm-2am DJJay DJDaniiafi Spinning ttt 3am i 7pni-2am 22 23 24 25 Happy TfiansiEgMfkg 26 1S7 55 TEADANCE Football Freaks SLOW JAMS Bi9oestBar»me AOLPMy ^rarsNTTE OUBNTIE Twiljte T* Dance FREE PIZZAI 2f6r1 <^ the Year! Same spedab foiksl 2 fori Oance Your Asi Off 7pm-1am $1.50 RoHing Rocks SortMigteftyOatet Bring in ytKir VlP. caHl Bartmnstxtepni 1Cteni-*3ani H'-.i 2 fbr 1 Wdl/Dom 3 TVs Oet Togethers QJ Damian DJ Damian WdtandOomestfe 10pm-2am W DJ Sammy Rock and Aitemative lOpmnmidnight 7pm-2am Spinning «3ain 29 30 TEA DANCE Football Freaks ^ Twitite T-Dance FREE PIZZAI ^ 7pm-lam $1.50 RollitM Rocks ^ 2f6r1^l/Dom 3 TVs P; DJ Sammy Rock and Aitemative ^ 7pm-2am

• Rozen Margaritas Mon* thru Fri. 12-7 «/Hdppy Hour iv/JefF - Mon. thru Fri. / Saturday Happy Hour w/ Pmd 12*7 YlOURS: 12no(m'2am f • Sunday Hi^ipy Hour «r/ Brandy 12-7 <• FRFE MUNCHIES DURING HAPPY HOUR • BUY TWO DRiNKS GFl O^ I M:^r 21 AND OVER ONLY WITH PROPER li). • NO COVER CHARGE • fWOONS AMMLAMIMEXT OOOtt TO THE VJ-VVL J

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I NightOut Classifieds att SS/orth^Jirtt SO't^imk fmy ttddsHottal 10 words is //. 7^ deatl&tte tithe \ ^>f9fthett>ontbforthefolhmngtttottth'sisstt^,^ all rwqtttntt^nts far the Classified seetiott ^^tpfy^Satd 9rMttg ad a^dpayment to The Empty Chset, 179 AtiattticAtfe,, Rochester NY 14607-1255. SERVICES Thc best body/musde lubs. It's ihc time of the year to be thankful, and you wiU Ifyou're looldng for 6REAr em in ttic bc after a one-hour refrershing. rcjuvenat- ing> tciaxing tubdown.l Six years experience and many pleased repeat customers are rea­ area, antf you don't have a money tm sons to call me. In/Out appointments. Rea­ sonable rates. For the best, call (716)235- 6688 today! bacl(yard...glve us a tiVf HOT OIL RUB. Very relaxing full-body rub, on massage table. Affordable rates $15/ hour; students only Sl 2/hour; odiers S15/ MasterMinutes hour. Male attendant. Discretion assuted. Many repeat customers. Evening/weekend appointments, call (716)325-7241 Monday- CHECK OUT OUK PRICESllli Thursday 10-11 pm. no IW Mosa CfiurwtfS «N 4M0I * IO*' for 90 Minutes (120 per minute) Sensuous fill] body deep muscle Swed­ ish style oil rub. By experienced, profes­ *30^ for 5 hours (IO0 per minute) sional, attractive, slim, dark-haired guy in his 40s. Session done in a vety safe, pleasant, $10000 for 2 hours a day for 30 days (40 per minute) comfortable atmosphere in a private townhouse in the Charlotte area. Swedish ...to purchase MasterMinutes call 464*0000 rub has gained more and more resurgence TTie Qutreacli Proj and respect as a definite method of facilitat­ of AIDS Rodiester, ing healing. It releases tension and muscular pain and gready improves mental and physi­ 716.442.2220 MasferDafciMherteri Oritiiutf CamieclMi! cal fatigue. Highly recommended by top phy­ sicians. Student rates available for you guys glbreach@aidsroch^ter.org 25 and under. Discretion assured. Call Mark any day for appointment, (716)581-2282.

C OrHl»" Cownmnteaitens, Inc. 18+. Customar aonim 4644)000. Benefit ar — cold weather... FOCUS

Jeff Palmer's 1999 AIDS Benelit Calendar is now available. Black and white images of men alone and men with men celebrate the beauty 4>f male couples. Proceeds fronrt the Calendar are distributed to agencies across the country which provide direct services to people living with HiV and AIDS. Over $400»000 has been distributed since the first Calendar in 1990* . New this yean fhe 1999 Plssiijon CalerMlar also featurtts Irniigiw cif m with nnen. To receive^tlie t#i9MI^ Calendar 49r the ^mltttitott%^&imti^^ $13 each, plus $3 sh^p^f^i^l ahd hancttm^ Origliiais,iaiiptilK»^B^ 230034,

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