Scholastic Vol

-._-_.-'.'--- - scholastic Vol. 120, No.1, September 8, 1978 Notre Dame, Indiana - 1------, I Scholastic - I FEATURES Think about it. What do your parents hear I LaFortune Student Center I _I Notre Dame, Indiana 46556 I 4 Mountain Paradox Mary Beth Dakoske about Notre Name while you're here? The I I 7 Meet the Provost Elizabeth Donovan pink slips, the report cards, the room damage I Please send ... ;...... years of Scholastic I I I 8 Whipped Cream and Jimmies Paul Korzeniowski fees, the Bill. This year, give them something I at $5.00 per year to: I I .' I 10 Gentlemen, Place Your Bets Jim Trausch to smile about. Give them a taste of the thrill , N . I- I arne ...... ; ...... ······· .. 1 and excitement of Notre Dame as you see I I Address ...... ;. it every day-give them a subscription to the I I I C't " ,- REGULARS Scholastic. I I y...... ·····:···,1 13 People at ND Theresa Rebeck 1S t - . I I t a e ...... ~...... Zip... ;•...... I 14 The last Word Jake Morrissey L --II

Illustrations: All illustrations done by Mike Cantwell except page 15, done by Cynthia Dykhoff. '" .• _. ' - , Photographs: All photographs _done by Phillip Johnson. Cover: Mike Cantwell.

Do little elves do it? Do starry eyed English profs do it? No-YOU do it: Editor Staff John Morrissey Marcie Weigle, Cindy Dykhoff, Craig Smith, leo J. MulcaheYI Greg 'G. Gregory, John Managing Editor McDermott. . Theresa. Rebeck . Write stories Art Director Mike Cantwell Read copy Production Manager Bernie Valenti Learn layout procedures News Editor Liz Donovan Organize pandemonium' Culture Editor Dave Satterfield Sports Editor Mike Kenahan The opinio'ns expressed in Scholastic are those of the authors' and edi'tors of Scholastic Fiction Editor The Scholastic. 3rdfloor LaFortune Student and do not necessarily represent the opinions of the University of Notre Dame, its Tom Balcerek administration,' faculty or the student body. . . '. Center•. Stop by at lunchtime or come up to Copy Editor Bob Southard - .' . . Layout Editor Activities Night, September 11. We want you The magazine is represented for national advertising by National Educational Advertising Lisa Hartenberger Services and CASS Student Advertising, Inc. Published fortnightly during the school year to do it. Photography Editor Phil Johnson except during vacation and examination periods, Scholastic is printed at Ave Maria Press, Business Manager Notre Dame, Ind. 46556. The subscription rate is $5.00 "a year and back issues' are Kimberlie Gumz_ ,- ., available from Scholastic. Please address all manuscripts to Scholastic, Notre Dame, Ind. ',46556. All unsolicited material becomes the property of Scholastic. Advi~ory Board copyright © 1978 Scholastic I all-rightsreserved I none of the. contents may be repro-_ Elizabeth Christman, John Reid. duced without permission. _,

2 SCHOLASTIC . SEPTEMBER 8, 1978 3 - scholastic Vol. 120, No.1, September 8, 1978 Notre Dame, Indiana - 1------, I Scholastic - I FEATURES Think about it. What do your parents hear I LaFortune Student Center I _I Notre Dame, Indiana 46556 I 4 Mountain Paradox Mary Beth Dakoske about Notre Name while you're here? The I I 7 Meet the Provost Elizabeth Donovan pink slips, the report cards, the room damage I Please send ... ;...... years of Scholastic I I I 8 Whipped Cream and Jimmies Paul Korzeniowski fees, the Bill. This year, give them something I at $5.00 per year to: I I .' I 10 Gentlemen, Place Your Bets Jim Trausch to smile about. Give them a taste of the thrill , N . I- I arne ...... ; ...... ······· .. 1 and excitement of Notre Dame as you see I I Address ...... ;. it every day-give them a subscription to the I I I C't " ,- REGULARS Scholastic. I I y...... ·····:···,1 13 People at ND Theresa Rebeck 1S t - . I I t a e ...... ~...... Zip... ;•...... I 14 The last Word Jake Morrissey L --II

Illustrations: All illustrations done by Mike Cantwell except page 15, done by Cynthia Dykhoff. '" .• _. ' - , Photographs: All photographs _done by Phillip Johnson. Cover: Mike Cantwell.

2 SCHOLASTIC . SEPTEMBER 8, 1978 3 personal need to feed his family was only as "Mrs. Hill, Sedric's wife." As out what might be special about it.) clearly more urgent than the long- we talked, she occasionally lowered With a twinkle in her eye, she ex range, . collective need to save the her voice to tell me some of the grim plained: "'A summer-born young soil. But the cracked voice, the facts of her life: "Sedric whups me 'uns from wintertime lovin'.' clouded eyes raised to scan a shaved from time to time, but I don't let him Haven't you ever heard that?" 1 had mountainside told me that this man lay a hand on the young'uns. He'll to admit that was a new one for me. MOUNTAIN PARADOX was not a strip miner by choice. wander off for weeks when he gets In fact, there was much that was When work becames a burden not the notion. But he always comes new to me in her experience, much only . to the body, but to a man's back to us. Sedric's a good man, that 1 couldn't understand. I very soul, who can blame those who really. He don't drink, nor smoke, Although she puts up with .her by Mary Beth Dakoske give up the work and simply nor curse." Sedric still didn't sound husband's "whuppings" and "wander whittle? too terrific to me. I was thinking ings," Mrs. Hill is a capable, intelli On a summer night in Roses Creek Visitors to this third-world pocket The people are themselves a para The ,women of Appalachia reveal how I'd prefer a little drinking, gent woman. I couldn't understand Hollow, a squeaky front porch rocker in Anierica's South' look at- the dox. Though they lease their land I, something quite,. different. The smoking and cursing to Sedric's style. why she would hide her strength keeps time .with the chirp of crickets. shacks, the filth, the disease and from alien, absentee landlords, strong, resourceful matriarch man- On this particular day, Mrs. Hill from her husband and feign submis Cool ~ountain breezes lift the wonder: "How can 'peopie live that mountain people possess the earth in ages her household on her own store had already carried ten gallon jugs Si0I1. There were lessons for me that lingering scent of honeysuckle from way?" Consider the feudal system a unique way. In this Bible belt,the of grit; but this same woman will of water from the public water day in the. local laundromat, many: the vine, and the mist settles in 'til that operates in Appalachia and the promise in Deuteronomy is pro cower in the presence of "herman." spigot, fixed an·· ample breakfast 1 still ponder. As we parted, -Mrs: morning. Somewhere "up the holler" answer becomes painfully clear. The claimed at Baptist revivals as' a Pioneer-spirited, very few are ac- for her family of eight, weeded tlie Hill remarked, "I don't know wliy the suppertime smell of cornbread coal companies own the land, the pledge to be taken~ qhite seriously: tually liberated. One morning in the garden, fed the chickens and packed I've told you all my troubles, and and sausage finds it way down the houses, even the grocery stores in a "The Lord your God has given you local' laundromat, 1 met a woman the. pickup truck for a trip to. the you a stranger." There was a strange valley.·. For, the city-bred volunteer system that resembles serfdom in the this land for your own.... You who alerted me to this contradiction. laundry. Bathing her babies in. the bond between. us, strangers though to Appalachia these simple, even Middle Ages. Why paint your house shall possess it and you shall live Loaded down with two, babies, a sink, she, mused: "Life ain't none we were, ,and at the same time, dis~ sensual pleasures were welcomed or dig a well or install indoor plumb on it." pickup truck full of. clothes, and a too easy on this mountain,· but 1 tance. 1 could not share the values treats. But country living in the ing when the coal company that Listening to that reading and see jug of detergent, she welcomed an wouldn't live nowhere else in all that 'determined her .life, nor accept Cumberlands is not all crickets and owns your land might evict you ing its' denial in the physical land extra hand, even from a stranger. God's whole creation." When I ad strength masked as weakness. .' But cornbread. The contrasts 1 discovered next month? scape were sharp contrasts for me. , Our' chat that morning was inter- mired her little, blond-haired baby, I knew, that for her, 'those values were often staggering. Many.families live in houses with- For the people of" Appalachia, the rupted occasionally to.change a load splashing in the sink, Mrs. Hill gave gave her life meaning. Appalachia is a land of paradox. out foundations, without screens (or incongruities seem' to 'go unnoticed. of laundry or a diaper, but in those me a meaningful look and said, "He's . Mountain 'children, shy and reti Surrounded by magnificent moun- even windows), and without running Some call it "foolishness," others few hours I came' to' admire the summer-born you know." My blank cent at first, offer another contrast; tains, rich natural resources, and water. And yet electrical appliances call it "faith,". bu£ there. remiliris quiet strength of this moimtairi wom- look told her, I didn't really under Once they know you, these same lush greenery, the people of this abound. A color television set. is an abiding trust that the limd they an. Though she was close to my." stand the'· 'significance of that. youngsters can be openly affection~ land live in stark poverty. In the not an unusual sight. One morning call "home" will someday be theirs own age and I gave her my first (Come to think of it, I'm summer ate. Once they kriow they're loved, midst of a flourishing "coal boom," I was visiting a family who lives in once more. name, she introduced herself to me' born m~self.l was curious to find you have a friend for life. mountain people continue to live on a tumble-down trailer in Chadwell Men, women and children operied ....-.~ ';. ~" \'V-'" , The first' day 1 arrived in Roses land owned by huge coal corpora- Holler. As we chatted over coffee on my eyes to the paradox of Appa ~ r>; Creek, I met a thirteen-year-old boy, tions and in shacks leased to them the front stoop, the television game lachia. The men on this mountain ~~~=~jj~~ "'t,j_..#\ . ~{\h'{t;. /'1;;/ ~ y..:: ')',~J ~Jt who was to become' a real friend: by. landlords who' would sooner see show inside promised lavish cash . are caught in the. dilemma of. either '" <", ~~. Robbie looked like· a tough child, them leave than fix a crumbling prizes, a Hawaiian holiday, and a strip mining the land they love or ~~ taking deep drags' from' a cigarette, foundation or repair a septic system. sporty red Porsche. I wondered what collecting unemployment. Women, '"' kicking a soft-drink can, and eyeing A large portion of Campbell County, that would mean to 'a mounta~n who rule' their households ,with up "that new female with the Michi Tennessee, is owned by a single com- _ family living below the poverty level. matriarchal . might, ani strangely gan license plates." A few days later, pany, "The American Association." 'What possible appeal would. such submissive to their husbands;"spo Robbie came to' our door' badly The company name is intentionally blatant consumerism have for them? radically indulgent to their children, bruised and bloody. He had taken a misleading; the American Associa- The fantasies that, flashed from that and shy in the presence of strangers. pretty bad fall from his motorbike tion is, in fact, a British Corpora- '''television box" were all such easy, The youngsters are' a stoiCal breed, onto ,the rough, gravel road beyond tion operated from offices in Lon- instant escapes from the injustice all at first bashful and distant, but our house. The' tough-guy facade don by executives who have never around them. As I squinted against openly affectionate once they know was forgotten, and Robbie was sim seen northeastern Tennessee. The the midmorning sun, the trailer it they're loved. ply a little kid in' need of attention. families have lived in Central Ap- self blurred into a box. 1 had an One evening in July, a coal nurier I washed his scrapes; bandaged'his palachia for several generations, but alarming image of boxes within sat on our front porch; whittling a bumps and we sat on the front porch they are fairly mobile in terms of boxes, and then-people inside those 'piece of oak as he talked. His eyes swing eating ice cream. A strange •housing .. ' It is' not unusual for a . boxes. People, who so warmly asked fixed on' the bit of wood; he -caught and wonderful friendship had begun. ,mountain family to be evicted from n1e to come in " . peopleIso des my own gaze with quick;' guarde~ I couldn't help' thinking how easily .. one home after another once coal is perately wanted to let out. glances. But his feelings poured out the little boy inside him had'tumbled 'discovered in their backyard. Sur- Diseases that had been long for-- with a candor that touched:'me out, how close to the surface his rounded by a wea.lth of minerals and gotten in middle Americarimram~ deeply. Glen Hembley told' me . how need for care. rich' resources; the lives. of these. pant in Appalachia~polio, goiter, reluctant he was to "mess with that Robbie is an amazingly indepen people remain'. untouched .• by their ,. scurvy, ringworm,. black' lung. But strip mining," how he hated 'the job dent child. Hisniother lives in - environment's economic.potential. In there are still old folks on the moun of blasting away at the mou'ntalnside Dayton,' Ohio, his father in the State winter some families· still have,· tain who can tell you where to find to unearth the surface COlii. In an Prison at Oak' Ridge, Tennessee. So trouble buying enough coal to heat the herbal cures for everything from' area where the, only reaL source of Robbie stays occasionally with "some their homes, even when coal is mined "yeller jaundiCe" to "sleep' twitch income is coal mining, his illternative kin up Buffalo Creek." Most of the right up the road. ing". was unemployment. The immediate, time he wanders up and down the 4 SCHOLASTIC SEPTEMBER 8, 1978 5

-'-"~ personal need to feed his family was only as "Mrs. Hill, Sedric's wife." As out what might be special about it.) clearly more urgent than the long- we talked, she occasionally lowered With a twinkle in her eye, she ex range, . collective need to save the her voice to tell me some of the grim plained: "'A summer-born young soil. But the cracked voice, the facts of her life: "Sedric whups me 'uns from wintertime lovin'.' clouded eyes raised to scan a shaved from time to time, but I don't let him Haven't you ever heard that?" 1 had mountainside told me that this man lay a hand on the young'uns. He'll to admit that was a new one for me. MOUNTAIN PARADOX was not a strip miner by choice. wander off for weeks when he gets In fact, there was much that was When work becames a burden not the notion. But he always comes new to me in her experience, much only . to the body, but to a man's back to us. Sedric's a good man, that 1 couldn't understand. I very soul, who can blame those who really. He don't drink, nor smoke, Although she puts up with .her by Mary Beth Dakoske give up the work and simply nor curse." Sedric still didn't sound husband's "whuppings" and "wander whittle? too terrific to me. I was thinking ings," Mrs. Hill is a capable, intelli On a summer night in Roses Creek Visitors to this third-world pocket The people are themselves a para The ,women of Appalachia reveal how I'd prefer a little drinking, gent woman. I couldn't understand Hollow, a squeaky front porch rocker in Anierica's South' look at- the dox. Though they lease their land I, something quite,. different. The smoking and cursing to Sedric's style. why she would hide her strength keeps time .with the chirp of crickets. shacks, the filth, the disease and from alien, absentee landlords, strong, resourceful matriarch man- On this particular day, Mrs. Hill from her husband and feign submis Cool ~ountain breezes lift the wonder: "How can 'peopie live that mountain people possess the earth in ages her household on her own store had already carried ten gallon jugs Si0I1. There were lessons for me that lingering scent of honeysuckle from way?" Consider the feudal system a unique way. In this Bible belt,the of grit; but this same woman will of water from the public water day in the. local laundromat, many: the vine, and the mist settles in 'til that operates in Appalachia and the promise in Deuteronomy is pro cower in the presence of "herman." spigot, fixed an·· ample breakfast 1 still ponder. As we parted, -Mrs: morning. Somewhere "up the holler" answer becomes painfully clear. The claimed at Baptist revivals as' a Pioneer-spirited, very few are ac- for her family of eight, weeded tlie Hill remarked, "I don't know wliy the suppertime smell of cornbread coal companies own the land, the pledge to be taken~ qhite seriously: tually liberated. One morning in the garden, fed the chickens and packed I've told you all my troubles, and and sausage finds it way down the houses, even the grocery stores in a "The Lord your God has given you local' laundromat, 1 met a woman the. pickup truck for a trip to. the you a stranger." There was a strange valley.·. For, the city-bred volunteer system that resembles serfdom in the this land for your own.... You who alerted me to this contradiction. laundry. Bathing her babies in. the bond between. us, strangers though to Appalachia these simple, even Middle Ages. Why paint your house shall possess it and you shall live Loaded down with two, babies, a sink, she, mused: "Life ain't none we were, ,and at the same time, dis~ sensual pleasures were welcomed or dig a well or install indoor plumb on it." pickup truck full of. clothes, and a too easy on this mountain,· but 1 tance. 1 could not share the values treats. But country living in the ing when the coal company that Listening to that reading and see jug of detergent, she welcomed an wouldn't live nowhere else in all that 'determined her .life, nor accept Cumberlands is not all crickets and owns your land might evict you ing its' denial in the physical land extra hand, even from a stranger. God's whole creation." When I ad strength masked as weakness. .' But cornbread. The contrasts 1 discovered next month? scape were sharp contrasts for me. , Our' chat that morning was inter- mired her little, blond-haired baby, I knew, that for her, 'those values were often staggering. Many.families live in houses with- For the people of" Appalachia, the rupted occasionally to.change a load splashing in the sink, Mrs. Hill gave gave her life meaning. Appalachia is a land of paradox. out foundations, without screens (or incongruities seem' to 'go unnoticed. of laundry or a diaper, but in those me a meaningful look and said, "He's . Mountain 'children, shy and reti Surrounded by magnificent moun- even windows), and without running Some call it "foolishness," others few hours I came' to' admire the summer-born you know." My blank cent at first, offer another contrast; tains, rich natural resources, and water. And yet electrical appliances call it "faith,". bu£ there. remiliris quiet strength of this moimtairi wom- look told her, I didn't really under Once they know you, these same lush greenery, the people of this abound. A color television set. is an abiding trust that the limd they an. Though she was close to my." stand the'· 'significance of that. youngsters can be openly affection~ land live in stark poverty. In the not an unusual sight. One morning call "home" will someday be theirs own age and I gave her my first (Come to think of it, I'm summer ate. Once they kriow they're loved, midst of a flourishing "coal boom," I was visiting a family who lives in once more. name, she introduced herself to me' born m~self.l was curious to find you have a friend for life. mountain people continue to live on a tumble-down trailer in Chadwell Men, women and children operied ....-.~ ';. ~" \'V-'" , The first' day 1 arrived in Roses land owned by huge coal corpora- Holler. As we chatted over coffee on my eyes to the paradox of Appa ~ r>; Creek, I met a thirteen-year-old boy, tions and in shacks leased to them the front stoop, the television game lachia. The men on this mountain ~~~=~jj~~ "'t,j_..#\ . ~{\h'{t;. /'1;;/ ~ y..:: ')',~J ~Jt who was to become' a real friend: by. landlords who' would sooner see show inside promised lavish cash . are caught in the. dilemma of. either '" <", ~~. Robbie looked like· a tough child, them leave than fix a crumbling prizes, a Hawaiian holiday, and a strip mining the land they love or ~~ taking deep drags' from' a cigarette, foundation or repair a septic system. sporty red Porsche. I wondered what collecting unemployment. Women, '"' kicking a soft-drink can, and eyeing A large portion of Campbell County, that would mean to 'a mounta~n who rule' their households ,with up "that new female with the Michi Tennessee, is owned by a single com- _ family living below the poverty level. matriarchal . might, ani strangely gan license plates." A few days later, pany, "The American Association." 'What possible appeal would. such submissive to their husbands;"spo Robbie came to' our door' badly The company name is intentionally blatant consumerism have for them? radically indulgent to their children, bruised and bloody. He had taken a misleading; the American Associa- The fantasies that, flashed from that and shy in the presence of strangers. pretty bad fall from his motorbike tion is, in fact, a British Corpora- '''television box" were all such easy, The youngsters are' a stoiCal breed, onto ,the rough, gravel road beyond tion operated from offices in Lon- instant escapes from the injustice all at first bashful and distant, but our house. The' tough-guy facade don by executives who have never around them. As I squinted against openly affectionate once they know was forgotten, and Robbie was sim seen northeastern Tennessee. The the midmorning sun, the trailer it they're loved. ply a little kid in' need of attention. families have lived in Central Ap- self blurred into a box. 1 had an One evening in July, a coal nurier I washed his scrapes; bandaged'his palachia for several generations, but alarming image of boxes within sat on our front porch; whittling a bumps and we sat on the front porch they are fairly mobile in terms of boxes, and then-people inside those 'piece of oak as he talked. His eyes swing eating ice cream. A strange •housing .. ' It is' not unusual for a . boxes. People, who so warmly asked fixed on' the bit of wood; he -caught and wonderful friendship had begun. ,mountain family to be evicted from n1e to come in " . peopleIso des my own gaze with quick;' guarde~ I couldn't help' thinking how easily .. one home after another once coal is perately wanted to let out. glances. But his feelings poured out the little boy inside him had'tumbled 'discovered in their backyard. Sur- Diseases that had been long for-- with a candor that touched:'me out, how close to the surface his rounded by a wea.lth of minerals and gotten in middle Americarimram~ deeply. Glen Hembley told' me . how need for care. rich' resources; the lives. of these. pant in Appalachia~polio, goiter, reluctant he was to "mess with that Robbie is an amazingly indepen people remain'. untouched .• by their ,. scurvy, ringworm,. black' lung. But strip mining," how he hated 'the job dent child. Hisniother lives in - environment's economic.potential. In there are still old folks on the moun of blasting away at the mou'ntalnside Dayton,' Ohio, his father in the State winter some families· still have,· tain who can tell you where to find to unearth the surface COlii. In an Prison at Oak' Ridge, Tennessee. So trouble buying enough coal to heat the herbal cures for everything from' area where the, only reaL source of Robbie stays occasionally with "some their homes, even when coal is mined "yeller jaundiCe" to "sleep' twitch income is coal mining, his illternative kin up Buffalo Creek." Most of the right up the road. ing". was unemployment. The immediate, time he wanders up and down the 4 SCHOLASTIC SEPTEMBER 8, 1978 5

-'-"~ mountain, . sleeping in a different me in the strange way I felt about can hear the coal trucks lumbering house every night or outdoors if it's leaving Appalachia. For weeks I had up the highway, the dynamite blasts not raining. By midsummer, Robbie struggled against feelings of isola in the distance, and the cry of a was staying at our house quite often. tion and loneliness. Yet 'when the "summer-born young'un/' That cry He would be up and off most morn- time came to leave, I knew I had echoes through the hills and "hollers" ings before I was stirring. Offers to formed some very special friend of Appalachia. Some nights it spans delay him until breakfast usually got ships. There were days when I felt the miles and reaches the heart of a firm "Yuk." I soon learned not the loss of all that was familiar and one who has left Appalachia' for to overdo the hospitality or this comfortable, but moments when I academia. The sound reminds me little Huck Finn would be long gone. felt at home. Sometimes the moun that there are still .men struggling The day I left Roses Creek, Robbie tains that encircled the hollow with the strip miner's dilemma, , stopped to say good-bye, hugged me seemed like a shelter; at other times, women masking their strength· as f from atop his motorbike, and then they felt like an enormous trap. I had submission, and children keeping I zoomed off down the dirt road. A few been a stranger in their land, and their distance, but" craving love. • minutes later, he returned. He these people had welcomed me, asked Hidden in those "hollers" are truths watched me pack the last of my me to stay, even offered me' a-job. long shrouded in paradox,· truths I suitcases into the car and finally Why was I itching to leave? As I have yet to probe; but the paradox spoke up: "There's something I fer drove down the mountain and prevails.. Last spring, after Father Burt resume of committee chairmanships, thus making the President .the lead got. I just gotta ask you." At this yielded to the Interstate, my muddled chaell resigned as Provost, the Uni scholarly publications, and admin ing spokesman for the university. point I was prepared for anything. emotions settled into a singular feel versity began its search for. a .suc istrative appointments. This past On occasion, in an effort to promote Shyly meeting my gaze, he said ing of solidarity with a peopleI had Mary Beth Dakoske, a graduate cessor. . Advertisements for a. new year O'Meara was a visiting scientist the school's welfare, the Provost simply, "You· really like me, don't grown to love. In my very confusion, student in the Department of· Eng~ Provost described him as "the first at the University of Toronto, and must also address "off-campus" con you?" To some questions, the an I had experienced the paradox of lish, teaches Freshman Composition ranking academic officer under the this. summer he was in Germany at stituencies: the general public" gov swers come so easily. ' Appalachia. and .Literature. The volunteer ex President." As q~tlined by the Fac the Gottingen Academy of Science. ernment officials, the Trustees, and I came to Clairfield, Tennessee, for On a' quiet night in the Cumber p~ence described here was ar ulty Senate, the '. chief academic of The Board of Trustees elects. a the alumni. a summer of volunteer service. With lands, the serenity is only on the ranged through the Office of Pastoral ficer "must be himself dedicated to Provost for an indefinite number of Notre Dame has established itself secret delight, I had left my grad surface. If Yl?u listen carefully, you Ministry by Monsignor Jack Egan. academic excellence. To faculty and years, but by O'Meara's own request, as an excellent institution of higher uate studies behind me. This was to students he should represent the in his tenure as Provost will be limited education. One task O'Meara feels be a long-awaited break from aca tellectual life,. distinguished by a to four years, at which time he will is set before him is to further im demic life. But there were lessons career of teaching, research, and return to teaching. It has been prove the university's reputation in for me in the hills of Appalachia, scholarly publication." rumored that the office of the. Pro academic circles. "Right now I feel lessons unheard of in the halls of Indeed, a tough bill to fill. Dr. O. vost is a. training ground for the we have a. very good undergraduate academia. Timothy O'Meara headed the Provost presidency, and in this light, program, faculty, and student body. The job description I responded to Search Committee which presented a O'Meara's appointment may· have Our mission has always been to be was an exciting array of possibilities. list of candidates. to Father Hes been controversial, for traditionally a champion of. human and' spiritual - I was to begin an oral history, re burgh. The President of the Uni the president has, always been a values. We have come a long way in search grant proposals, write news versity is empowered to recommend clergyman. The rumor is unfounded, scholarship and research, and we paper articles on the activities of other possible successors. Father however, because the duties of the can distinguish ourselves even fur local groups, publish a brochure on Hesburgh exercised this authority Provost and the President are ther through recognition of our fac a community Health Fair, catalogue and made one addition to the list: clearly distinct, arid. the former is ultyand attraction of more scholars." books for a new children's library, Dr.. O'Meara himself.. "It was news not necessarily a stepping-stone to , Aside from the strictly academic work in the Day Care Center, and to me," said O'Meara in reference to the latter. As stated by the Faculty side of his duties, O'Meara' would hold a Children's Story Hour. How his reaction to the Board of Trustees' Senate, "the Provost provides the like to see more minority members would I ever accomplish all this in approval of Hesburgh's recom University with the leadership in its added to the faculty and student ten weeks? A' familiar fear set in. mendation. . Yet after reviewing intellectual endeavors, while the body. Increasing the number of wom-' n was like that overwhelming panic O'Meara's background, the choice is President _ offers a 'more general en at Notre Dame is also a considera at the start of a new semester. So indeed .consistent with the require leadership, which might be called tion for the new provost. much. to do in such a short time! I ments set forth by the Faculty Sen- moral, or ideological, or even spir O'Meara's interest in Notre Dame was back in the. mind-set I had ate. . itual. The Provost should be chosen . and its future is undeniable. Any traveled hundreds of' miles to O'Meara was born in Cape Town, for his qualifications as Provost, father who would send four' of his avoid. But after a few. weeks, a South Africa. One of five children rather than for his promise as a children (Maria, Tim,Jean, Kate) strange thing happened.. I started to of an Italian mother and an Irish President." to a university has obvious faith in slip into a slower pace of living. The father, he describes himself as "half Created in 1970, the position of the school's ability to provide an ex leisurely rhythms of. life in Appa Irish, half Italian, all South African," Provost united into one office several cellent education. As "chief academic lachia felt more and more com and since his naturalization in 1977, administrative positions that were officer" of Notre Dame, O'Meara will fortable. I decided to do whatever "all American." He earned his B.Sc. formerly distinct. The Provost,' by be a strong influence on the Univer I could in that short period of time, and M.Sc. from the University of definition, is "the leading academic sity and the academic path which it leave a certain factor to fate, risk Cape Town, then completed his doc officer." His duties include oversee takes in the next four years. the inevitable failures, and simply toral work in mathematics at Prince ing all. academic. programs, faculty BE. Curiously enough, it was at this ton in 1953. In 1962, after teaching appointments and promotions, and pOint that I started to make· prog at Princeton for several years, the relationship of students to fac Elizabeth Donovan, a senior Ameri ress, and 'my :work was really un O'Meara joined the Mathematics De ulty and academics. The Provost can Studies major from South Bend, der way. partment at Notre Dame and has concerns himself primarily with the is News Editor of this year's Schoo. . There was a personal paradox for since . accumulated an enviable internal affairs of the ,university, las tic.

6 SEPTEMBER 8, 1978 7 ' mountain, . sleeping in a different me in the strange way I felt about can hear the coal trucks lumbering house every night or outdoors if it's leaving Appalachia. For weeks I had up the highway, the dynamite blasts not raining. By midsummer, Robbie struggled against feelings of isola in the distance, and the cry of a was staying at our house quite often. tion and loneliness. Yet 'when the "summer-born young'un/' That cry He would be up and off most morn- time came to leave, I knew I had echoes through the hills and "hollers" ings before I was stirring. Offers to formed some very special friend of Appalachia. Some nights it spans delay him until breakfast usually got ships. There were days when I felt the miles and reaches the heart of a firm "Yuk." I soon learned not the loss of all that was familiar and one who has left Appalachia' for to overdo the hospitality or this comfortable, but moments when I academia. The sound reminds me little Huck Finn would be long gone. felt at home. Sometimes the moun that there are still .men struggling The day I left Roses Creek, Robbie tains that encircled the hollow with the strip miner's dilemma, , stopped to say good-bye, hugged me seemed like a shelter; at other times, women masking their strength· as f from atop his motorbike, and then they felt like an enormous trap. I had submission, and children keeping I zoomed off down the dirt road. A few been a stranger in their land, and their distance, but" craving love. • minutes later, he returned. He these people had welcomed me, asked Hidden in those "hollers" are truths watched me pack the last of my me to stay, even offered me' a-job. long shrouded in paradox,· truths I suitcases into the car and finally Why was I itching to leave? As I have yet to probe; but the paradox spoke up: "There's something I fer drove down the mountain and prevails.. Last spring, after Father Burt resume of committee chairmanships, thus making the President .the lead got. I just gotta ask you." At this yielded to the Interstate, my muddled chaell resigned as Provost, the Uni scholarly publications, and admin ing spokesman for the university. point I was prepared for anything. emotions settled into a singular feel versity began its search for. a .suc istrative appointments. This past On occasion, in an effort to promote Shyly meeting my gaze, he said ing of solidarity with a peopleI had Mary Beth Dakoske, a graduate cessor. . Advertisements for a. new year O'Meara was a visiting scientist the school's welfare, the Provost simply, "You· really like me, don't grown to love. In my very confusion, student in the Department of· Eng~ Provost described him as "the first at the University of Toronto, and must also address "off-campus" con you?" To some questions, the an I had experienced the paradox of lish, teaches Freshman Composition ranking academic officer under the this. summer he was in Germany at stituencies: the general public" gov swers come so easily. ' Appalachia. and .Literature. The volunteer ex President." As q~tlined by the Fac the Gottingen Academy of Science. ernment officials, the Trustees, and I came to Clairfield, Tennessee, for On a' quiet night in the Cumber p~ence described here was ar ulty Senate, the '. chief academic of The Board of Trustees elects. a the alumni. a summer of volunteer service. With lands, the serenity is only on the ranged through the Office of Pastoral ficer "must be himself dedicated to Provost for an indefinite number of Notre Dame has established itself secret delight, I had left my grad surface. If Yl?u listen carefully, you Ministry by Monsignor Jack Egan. academic excellence. To faculty and years, but by O'Meara's own request, as an excellent institution of higher uate studies behind me. This was to students he should represent the in his tenure as Provost will be limited education. One task O'Meara feels be a long-awaited break from aca tellectual life,. distinguished by a to four years, at which time he will is set before him is to further im demic life. But there were lessons career of teaching, research, and return to teaching. It has been prove the university's reputation in for me in the hills of Appalachia, scholarly publication." rumored that the office of the. Pro academic circles. "Right now I feel lessons unheard of in the halls of Indeed, a tough bill to fill. Dr. O. vost is a. training ground for the we have a. very good undergraduate academia. Timothy O'Meara headed the Provost presidency, and in this light, program, faculty, and student body. The job description I responded to Search Committee which presented a O'Meara's appointment may· have Our mission has always been to be was an exciting array of possibilities. list of candidates. to Father Hes been controversial, for traditionally a champion of. human and' spiritual - I was to begin an oral history, re burgh. The President of the Uni the president has, always been a values. We have come a long way in search grant proposals, write news versity is empowered to recommend clergyman. The rumor is unfounded, scholarship and research, and we paper articles on the activities of other possible successors. Father however, because the duties of the can distinguish ourselves even fur local groups, publish a brochure on Hesburgh exercised this authority Provost and the President are ther through recognition of our fac a community Health Fair, catalogue and made one addition to the list: clearly distinct, arid. the former is ultyand attraction of more scholars." books for a new children's library, Dr.. O'Meara himself.. "It was news not necessarily a stepping-stone to , Aside from the strictly academic work in the Day Care Center, and to me," said O'Meara in reference to the latter. As stated by the Faculty side of his duties, O'Meara' would hold a Children's Story Hour. How his reaction to the Board of Trustees' Senate, "the Provost provides the like to see more minority members would I ever accomplish all this in approval of Hesburgh's recom University with the leadership in its added to the faculty and student ten weeks? A' familiar fear set in. mendation. . Yet after reviewing intellectual endeavors, while the body. Increasing the number of wom-' n was like that overwhelming panic O'Meara's background, the choice is President _ offers a 'more general en at Notre Dame is also a considera at the start of a new semester. So indeed .consistent with the require leadership, which might be called tion for the new provost. much. to do in such a short time! I ments set forth by the Faculty Sen- moral, or ideological, or even spir O'Meara's interest in Notre Dame was back in the. mind-set I had ate. . itual. The Provost should be chosen . and its future is undeniable. Any traveled hundreds of' miles to O'Meara was born in Cape Town, for his qualifications as Provost, father who would send four' of his avoid. But after a few. weeks, a South Africa. One of five children rather than for his promise as a children (Maria, Tim,Jean, Kate) strange thing happened.. I started to of an Italian mother and an Irish President." to a university has obvious faith in slip into a slower pace of living. The father, he describes himself as "half Created in 1970, the position of the school's ability to provide an ex leisurely rhythms of. life in Appa Irish, half Italian, all South African," Provost united into one office several cellent education. As "chief academic lachia felt more and more com and since his naturalization in 1977, administrative positions that were officer" of Notre Dame, O'Meara will fortable. I decided to do whatever "all American." He earned his B.Sc. formerly distinct. The Provost,' by be a strong influence on the Univer I could in that short period of time, and M.Sc. from the University of definition, is "the leading academic sity and the academic path which it leave a certain factor to fate, risk Cape Town, then completed his doc officer." His duties include oversee takes in the next four years. the inevitable failures, and simply toral work in mathematics at Prince ing all. academic. programs, faculty BE. Curiously enough, it was at this ton in 1953. In 1962, after teaching appointments and promotions, and pOint that I started to make· prog at Princeton for several years, the relationship of students to fac Elizabeth Donovan, a senior Ameri ress, and 'my :work was really un O'Meara joined the Mathematics De ulty and academics. The Provost can Studies major from South Bend, der way. partment at Notre Dame and has concerns himself primarily with the is News Editor of this year's Schoo. . There was a personal paradox for since . accumulated an enviable internal affairs of the ,university, las tic.

6 SEPTEMBER 8, 1978 7 ' the man's butt. Jill thought for a to the Clorox boxes. TWo elderly screamed. The crowd let out a gasp moment, then she realized that she women were staring intently at the of disbelief. The man stopped hUm was on _television. This must be a man; One of the women whispered . . .. ming. Candid Camera sketch done by the to her companion, "He must' be on "Can't you let me die?" he asked. creW- from Saturday Night Live. Her drugs." Her companion nodded her. As he spoke, he raised his right hand Whipped· Cream With Jimmies . eyes I searched, for the. hidden head in agreement. The people stood to his 'face. The palmaf his right camera. .- silently waiting for the man to make hand was' drIpping with .blood. A '."O.K. Now where is the hidden some type of movement.· Suddenly stream of blood ran down his right camera ?', she asked. he stopped whistling and he began side and onto the floor. He scratched The man continued to whistle. Jill to hum the "Notre Dame Victory' his cheek with his right hand, leav by Paul Korzeniowski became agitated."Just what do you March." ing streaks of blood on his face. The think you are doing?" she asked. As he was humming the chorus, a noses of the two' elderly ladies As Jill Halley's left hand reached have her. period, and the last· thing Mr. Goldsteitl's idea. He was a "I'm dying," the man answered." short, bald man of about fifty years wrinkled and they closed their eyes. over the clear glass panel and into 'she wanted to do was look all over pretty smart Jew. r. , \ "Oh, I. see,"Jill replied. "But why of age came jogging down the Jill turned her head to the side. Jef the frozen food container a chill . the supermarket for her four-year- "What kind of tricks was he do are you. dying in the cookie aisle of cookie aisle. He had a smock similar frey stared at the man on the floor. from the cold air went up her left old son.' . ing?" Jill asked. Newman's Market?" she asked. to the stock boy's smock. He did "Come now, Jeffrey, we have arm and down her spine. She picked "Jeffrey, Jeffrey," she cried. "He was stickhig. swords in him "It's God's' will," the man' an not have a large yellow stain' on his shopping' to do," Jill said as she up two' packages of Green. Giant '. 'As she pushed her shopping cart self. Real long ones," Jeffrey re- swered; left side but he had a name tag over started to push her cart up the aisle French Cut Beans but as she was down the aisle, her son turned the plied. '; : Jill stood silently staring at the his right pocket. His name tag read toward the girl behind the cash reg lifting the box up she realized that corner iri front of her and'ran to-· "Really, where is he?" Jill asked. man. He . continued whistling. Jill "Mr. Smith." ister. Jeffrey remained stationary she had the wrong kind of beanS' ward her: He was" small,' even for a "He's right there," Jeffrey. said;' looked down the cookie aisle and she "What do you want?" he asked for a moment, then he ran after his and she let· the packages fall back' child of four years. His eyes were pointing toward the end of the aisle. spotted a stock boy at the other end the stock boy. Before anyone could mother. into the' freezer. After her eyes had dark brown like his father's eyes; Jill pushed her shopping cart .past of the aisle. She waved her hands to speak Mr. Smith saw the puddle of "Mommy, what was that man scanned the freezer she reached in but . his hair was blond and· curly the Bird's Eye Frozen' Foods dis get his attention. The. young man blood and the man sitting on. the doing?" he asked. once more but this time she grasped like his mother's hair. Many people play. As she turned the corner she moved toward -her. He was wearing floor." "I don't know, Jeffrey," she said. two packages of Green Giant Six thought he was a girl, and sometimes looked for a magician. She didn't a white smock that had a large yel "Oh,shit,". Mr. Smith said. "Does "What's 'God's will'?" he aSked. Ounce String Beans.' They were sale his father feared ·that the boy would see one. low stain onthe left side and a' small' a'nyone know who this man is?" he "Jeffrey, how would you like a priced at two for one dollar. Then be a homosexUal when he grew up. "Where is he?" she asked: blue name tag over the right pocket. asked. hot fudge sundae?" Jill asked. she· casually dropped the two boxes When Jeffrey was within an arm's "He's right there," Jeffrey said, His name was Steve. .·"1 do," Jeffrey said, "he's Mr. "With whipped cream and jim into her half-full shopping cart. As length of his mother her right hand pointing to 'a man "who was seated "Yes, ma'am, can I help you?" he Magician." . , mies?" he asked. she dropped the beans into the cart, reached out,' grabbed him by the on the floor. The man had a few asked. Jill's face turned red. "Isn't she "With whipped cream and' jim she raised.' her. right hand to chest; shoulder, and pulled him toward strands of blond hair on the top of his Jill raised her right hand and cute, Mabel," the' elderly .woman mies," she answered. , level. In her right hand:was a small her. She pointed her left index finger head. These strands looked. like they pointed at the' man sitting with' his said. Her' companion 'nodded her. "Yummy, yummy, yummy," Jef~ piece of' paper with jagged edges. at his face while bending down so had not been combed in a month.' back to the bOxes of Clorox Bleach. head in agreement. Both' of the frey said, running his tongue across Printed on the back of the paper that her face was about eight inches His eyes were small' arid brown' and' The stock boy. moved toward him.; women smiled as they stared at Jill., his lips in a circular motion:' was the date, January 17, 1974. Jill from his nose. Looking him straight he had a brown mustache. He was The . man . was ,now whistling Ignoring Jeffrey and both the elder "Let's go, then, we've done enough had ripped this piece of paper from in the eye she said, "Jeffrey, how dressed in blue overalls which per "DixIe." " ly ladies, Mr. Smith bent· down and shopping today," she said. ' an old journal that she had found many times do I have to tell you to fectly matched his blue-striped "Can I help you, sir," the boy moved . closer' to the man on the in· her kitchen earlier this morning. stay close to me? Why don't you· shirt. His hand were folded, 'resting asked. .'. '-. ,,' floor. Mr. Smith. fixed his eyes on' Jill·looked at the items .that' were ever listen to me? Next time I will on top of his black belt. He· was ;uNo, I'm fine," the man said, and the object, that was sticking, out of Paul Korzeniowski is 1978 grad written on the paper: . potato chips, give you a good . whack." Jeffrey's sitting with his . legs outstretched a he' began whistling again.· The stock the man's stomach. "Jesus Christ,. uate with, a B.A. in American celery, beets, Rice-a-Roni·"- Beef brown eyes stared sheepishly athis and his back was supported by three boy reached with hisleft hand at'the it's ian ice pick," Mr. Smith Studies. style, milk,: apples;· oranges. WhEm mother. cases of Clorox Bleach; The top case she was sure that none of :the items' "Where did you go?" she asked. was' open .and a sign was" hanging puddle that'. was on the floor. He on the list could be found in the ."I was going to the cookie 'aisle to over it. The sign said: SALE 3 BOT-· ilip~d his index finger in· the. pud-. Frozen Food aisle,' she reached into get some Fig Newtons so you: TLES OF CLOROX BLEACH FOR dIe then he raised "his finger to his eyes. After looking at his finger for, her brown pocketbook and took out wouldn;t forget; ..~ but I guess I ONLY' $2.00 LIMIT 9 BOTTLES her pen. Then she placed' a small forgot. Guess. who I saw Mommy," PER' CUSTOMER.. The man was a few seconds the boy turned, and called:to blonde-haired girl who checlcinark next to the item marked he said. whistling "Camp Town' Racetrack'" . a Green Giant Six Ounce String Beans· . "Who?" she asked. while he sat. was, standing behind the cash regis~ < on the shopping list. She placed the '''Oh, guess, Mom," Jeffrey whined.'. '-'What made you think that' he ter.:, "tori, call Mr. Smith for me, pen and·: paper in· her : left shirt . Jill was in no mood to play guess-., was, a magician,"Jeffrey?" : Jill please," he said .. ' • pocket, : then she pUshed her shop ing games. "All right. Let's see, asked. :, "What for?" the girl a·sked. . "JUst' call him, please," the boy. ping cart toward the end of the Grandma?'.' she asked. , . "Look near his belly button, Mom s3Jd.' - . '. ' aisle. "Jeffrey, whai· kind of ' ... -"Nope, I saw a magician," Jeffrey my. He had a long sword and he Jeffrey, Jeffrey, where:iare 'you?" said. stuck it into his belly button. See •She reached under the register. . she asked.' Her eyes quickly looked "A magician. In the cookie aisle?" the handle," Jeffrey said." . and picked up a telephone. She up and down the aisle but"her four Jill said with atone of disbelief. " Jill's eyes scanned the man's body~ diaJed·. 9 for the intercom. The year-old son was not·insight.- She "Honest; Mommy," Jeffrey said. ' Gazing at his folded hands she saw', easy liste~ing music that was being, let out a deep sigh. Her son had a Jill.thought it would be a good a'brown handle sticking out of his: played for the shoppers.' was inter-' habit of getting lost in grocery idea to 'have someone to entertain stomach. His hands partially cov-' rupted by. her. voice. "Mr. Smith, stores. Once she found him sleeping children while.' their parents ered the handle. As she look~d closer cookie, aisle. .Mr.. Smith, cookie behind a stack -of loaves of· Wonder: shopped. She could leave Jeffrey she saw some blood on hi~ hands' 'aisle,'!' she said. " Bread. Jill was not in a good mood there and not haye to worry about . and on his shirt. A small ;pool·, of: Shoppers_· had. begun' to form a this morning. She was starting to ·him. getting lost. It was:probably blood was forming on the floor near' circle, around the man seated next·

8 SCHOLASTIC SEPTEMBER 8, 1978 .9 the man's butt. Jill thought for a to the Clorox boxes. TWo elderly screamed. The crowd let out a gasp moment, then she realized that she women were staring intently at the of disbelief. The man stopped hUm was on _television. This must be a man; One of the women whispered . . .. ming. Candid Camera sketch done by the to her companion, "He must' be on "Can't you let me die?" he asked. creW- from Saturday Night Live. Her drugs." Her companion nodded her. As he spoke, he raised his right hand Whipped· Cream With Jimmies . eyes I searched, for the. hidden head in agreement. The people stood to his 'face. The palmaf his right camera. .- silently waiting for the man to make hand was' drIpping with .blood. A '."O.K. Now where is the hidden some type of movement.· Suddenly stream of blood ran down his right camera ?', she asked. he stopped whistling and he began side and onto the floor. He scratched The man continued to whistle. Jill to hum the "Notre Dame Victory' his cheek with his right hand, leav by Paul Korzeniowski became agitated."Just what do you March." ing streaks of blood on his face. The think you are doing?" she asked. As he was humming the chorus, a noses of the two' elderly ladies As Jill Halley's left hand reached have her. period, and the last· thing Mr. Goldsteitl's idea. He was a "I'm dying," the man answered." short, bald man of about fifty years wrinkled and they closed their eyes. over the clear glass panel and into 'she wanted to do was look all over pretty smart Jew. r. , \ "Oh, I. see,"Jill replied. "But why of age came jogging down the Jill turned her head to the side. Jef the frozen food container a chill . the supermarket for her four-year- "What kind of tricks was he do are you. dying in the cookie aisle of cookie aisle. He had a smock similar frey stared at the man on the floor. from the cold air went up her left old son.' . ing?" Jill asked. Newman's Market?" she asked. to the stock boy's smock. He did "Come now, Jeffrey, we have arm and down her spine. She picked "Jeffrey, Jeffrey," she cried. "He was stickhig. swords in him "It's God's' will," the man' an not have a large yellow stain' on his shopping' to do," Jill said as she up two' packages of Green. Giant '. 'As she pushed her shopping cart self. Real long ones," Jeffrey re- swered; left side but he had a name tag over started to push her cart up the aisle French Cut Beans but as she was down the aisle, her son turned the plied. '; : Jill stood silently staring at the his right pocket. His name tag read toward the girl behind the cash reg lifting the box up she realized that corner iri front of her and'ran to-· "Really, where is he?" Jill asked. man. He . continued whistling. Jill "Mr. Smith." ister. Jeffrey remained stationary she had the wrong kind of beanS' ward her: He was" small,' even for a "He's right there," Jeffrey. said;' looked down the cookie aisle and she "What do you want?" he asked for a moment, then he ran after his and she let· the packages fall back' child of four years. His eyes were pointing toward the end of the aisle. spotted a stock boy at the other end the stock boy. Before anyone could mother. into the' freezer. After her eyes had dark brown like his father's eyes; Jill pushed her shopping cart .past of the aisle. She waved her hands to speak Mr. Smith saw the puddle of "Mommy, what was that man scanned the freezer she reached in but . his hair was blond and· curly the Bird's Eye Frozen' Foods dis get his attention. The. young man blood and the man sitting on. the doing?" he asked. once more but this time she grasped like his mother's hair. Many people play. As she turned the corner she moved toward -her. He was wearing floor." "I don't know, Jeffrey," she said. two packages of Green Giant Six thought he was a girl, and sometimes looked for a magician. She didn't a white smock that had a large yel "Oh,shit,". Mr. Smith said. "Does "What's 'God's will'?" he aSked. Ounce String Beans.' They were sale his father feared ·that the boy would see one. low stain onthe left side and a' small' a'nyone know who this man is?" he "Jeffrey, how would you like a priced at two for one dollar. Then be a homosexUal when he grew up. "Where is he?" she asked: blue name tag over the right pocket. asked. hot fudge sundae?" Jill asked. she· casually dropped the two boxes When Jeffrey was within an arm's "He's right there," Jeffrey said, His name was Steve. .·"1 do," Jeffrey said, "he's Mr. "With whipped cream and jim into her half-full shopping cart. As length of his mother her right hand pointing to 'a man "who was seated "Yes, ma'am, can I help you?" he Magician." . , mies?" he asked. she dropped the beans into the cart, reached out,' grabbed him by the on the floor. The man had a few asked. Jill's face turned red. "Isn't she "With whipped cream and' jim she raised.' her. right hand to chest; shoulder, and pulled him toward strands of blond hair on the top of his Jill raised her right hand and cute, Mabel," the' elderly .woman mies," she answered. , level. In her right hand:was a small her. She pointed her left index finger head. These strands looked. like they pointed at the' man sitting with' his said. Her' companion 'nodded her. "Yummy, yummy, yummy," Jef~ piece of' paper with jagged edges. at his face while bending down so had not been combed in a month.' back to the bOxes of Clorox Bleach. head in agreement. Both' of the frey said, running his tongue across Printed on the back of the paper that her face was about eight inches His eyes were small' arid brown' and' The stock boy. moved toward him.; women smiled as they stared at Jill., his lips in a circular motion:' was the date, January 17, 1974. Jill from his nose. Looking him straight he had a brown mustache. He was The . man . was ,now whistling Ignoring Jeffrey and both the elder "Let's go, then, we've done enough had ripped this piece of paper from in the eye she said, "Jeffrey, how dressed in blue overalls which per "DixIe." " ly ladies, Mr. Smith bent· down and shopping today," she said. ' an old journal that she had found many times do I have to tell you to fectly matched his blue-striped "Can I help you, sir," the boy moved . closer' to the man on the in· her kitchen earlier this morning. stay close to me? Why don't you· shirt. His hand were folded, 'resting asked. .'. '-. ,,' floor. Mr. Smith. fixed his eyes on' Jill·looked at the items .that' were ever listen to me? Next time I will on top of his black belt. He· was ;uNo, I'm fine," the man said, and the object, that was sticking, out of Paul Korzeniowski is 1978 grad written on the paper: . potato chips, give you a good . whack." Jeffrey's sitting with his . legs outstretched a he' began whistling again.· The stock the man's stomach. "Jesus Christ,. uate with, a B.A. in American celery, beets, Rice-a-Roni·"- Beef brown eyes stared sheepishly athis and his back was supported by three boy reached with hisleft hand at'the it's ian ice pick," Mr. Smith Studies. style, milk,: apples;· oranges. WhEm mother. cases of Clorox Bleach; The top case she was sure that none of :the items' "Where did you go?" she asked. was' open .and a sign was" hanging puddle that'. was on the floor. He on the list could be found in the ."I was going to the cookie 'aisle to over it. The sign said: SALE 3 BOT-· ilip~d his index finger in· the. pud-. Frozen Food aisle,' she reached into get some Fig Newtons so you: TLES OF CLOROX BLEACH FOR dIe then he raised "his finger to his eyes. After looking at his finger for, her brown pocketbook and took out wouldn;t forget; ..~ but I guess I ONLY' $2.00 LIMIT 9 BOTTLES her pen. Then she placed' a small forgot. Guess. who I saw Mommy," PER' CUSTOMER.. The man was a few seconds the boy turned, and called:to blonde-haired girl who checlcinark next to the item marked he said. whistling "Camp Town' Racetrack'" . a Green Giant Six Ounce String Beans· . "Who?" she asked. while he sat. was, standing behind the cash regis~ < on the shopping list. She placed the '''Oh, guess, Mom," Jeffrey whined.'. '-'What made you think that' he ter.:, "tori, call Mr. Smith for me, pen and·: paper in· her : left shirt . Jill was in no mood to play guess-., was, a magician,"Jeffrey?" : Jill please," he said .. ' • pocket, : then she pUshed her shop ing games. "All right. Let's see, asked. :, "What for?" the girl a·sked. . "JUst' call him, please," the boy. ping cart toward the end of the Grandma?'.' she asked. , . "Look near his belly button, Mom s3Jd.' - . '. ' aisle. "Jeffrey, whai· kind of ' ... -"Nope, I saw a magician," Jeffrey my. He had a long sword and he Jeffrey, Jeffrey, where:iare 'you?" said. stuck it into his belly button. See •She reached under the register. . she asked.' Her eyes quickly looked "A magician. In the cookie aisle?" the handle," Jeffrey said." . and picked up a telephone. She up and down the aisle but"her four Jill said with atone of disbelief. " Jill's eyes scanned the man's body~ diaJed·. 9 for the intercom. The year-old son was not·insight.- She "Honest; Mommy," Jeffrey said. ' Gazing at his folded hands she saw', easy liste~ing music that was being, let out a deep sigh. Her son had a Jill.thought it would be a good a'brown handle sticking out of his: played for the shoppers.' was inter-' habit of getting lost in grocery idea to 'have someone to entertain stomach. His hands partially cov-' rupted by. her. voice. "Mr. Smith, stores. Once she found him sleeping children while.' their parents ered the handle. As she look~d closer cookie, aisle. .Mr.. Smith, cookie behind a stack -of loaves of· Wonder: shopped. She could leave Jeffrey she saw some blood on hi~ hands' 'aisle,'!' she said. " Bread. Jill was not in a good mood there and not haye to worry about . and on his shirt. A small ;pool·, of: Shoppers_· had. begun' to form a this morning. She was starting to ·him. getting lost. It was:probably blood was forming on the floor near' circle, around the man seated next·

8 SCHOLASTIC SEPTEMBER 8, 1978 .9 :v

Over 150 college football teams Muro and two-time All-American more of the same as the Irish nosed OKLAHOMA with the' return of seven starters. bechler, who has never won at Pasa start their season with one goal Jerry Robinson in the linebacking out 'Barna and claimed the national On the line Hugh Green, Dave' De dena, faced the heavy underdog to be ranked number one by the wire positions. Terry Donahue, third-year crown. Bear Bryant, third winning At Oklahoma there are 15 return ciccio, Bob Gruber, and Dave Logan Huskies, and still the team was service polls. Last year it was the -coach, has to be optimistic about this est coach of all time, is not accus ing starters, four All-Americans, and are coming off outstanding years. clipped; Leach, who proudly points Fighting Irish of Notre Dame, this year. After a disappointing start tomed to losing ways and this may a controversy brewing. Newspaper Team leader in tackles, Jeff Pelusi, to his passing records when his year there are many teams waiting . last year the Bruins rebounded to be the year the Tide beats the Notre stories report that Barry Switzer, heads a fine linebacker corps. Over ability is questioned, has looked like to ambush, the Irish. College foot post five victories in the last six Dame jinx and ascends to the top head coach, is going to quit. Switzer all this is another fine Pitt defense. anything but an All-American in his ball, like basketball, has become bal games and came within seconds of spot. labelled those stories as false. Sherrill has a relatively . easy three bowl appearances. anced and no longer does a small earning a trip to the Rose Bowl. Bryant must rebuild to get there. Switzer, when not rebuking news schedule to start the season. This That is not to say that Michigan cadre of elite teams dominate the Bashore is the key.. , He gained val Only two starters return from the paper stories, spent his summer re will enable his newcomers to gain will not have a good team. The of scene. The race for the national cham uable experience last year when he offensive line but one is All-American vamping the Sooners' wishbone at experience before killer road games fensive backfield returns and fea pionship is up for.grabs and anyone became the first Bruin sophomore to candidate Jim Bunch. Jeff Rutledge tack. The offense, led by Thomas at Syracuse, Penn State, and Notre tures Leach, who is a good runner of the ten teams mentioned below pass for over 1,000 yards and is is back to run the wishbone and he'll I Loot at quarterback, features vari Dame. ,The Panthers rare a year and a master at the option, lettennan could claim the title. Here ,are the ready to emerge as one of the best hand off to Tony Nathan, who ations of the wishbone and the I for away from a real shot at regaining , Harlan Huckleby, Russell Davis, and prime candidates for this year, quarterbacks in the country; UCLA's scored 15 touchdowns last year, or mation. The object is the same as their '76 glory. choose your. own order of finish. season hinges on their November 18 Mitch Ferguson. always-to get the ball to speedsters confrontation with crosstown rival The defense, meanwhile, has lost like Billy Sims, Freddie Nixon, and USC USC. If they leave the coliseum four starters. Fortunately for Barna David Overstreet and then get them with a victory, it is on to Pasadena fans the outstanding linebacker trio outside. Southern California merits consid and the national championship. of Barry Krause, Rich Wingo, and Defensively, the Sooners are solid. eration simply because they are SC: Ricky Gilliland remains intact. Ala George C. Cumbry and Daryle Hunt, The potential is there-33 letter bama also gets a break in that their ARKANSAS both outstanding linebackers are men, 11 starters, and 10 prep All.: two big games" with Nebraska and back. The line is thin but standout Americans, considered the best Arkansas, coming off a 41-6 Southern Cal, are at home. The road Reggie Kinla# is also back. In the freshman crop in the country. How thrashing of Oklahoma in the for Bear Bryant's boys leads to the backfield' Sherwood Taylor, Mike ever, who will fill 'the' quarterback Orange Bowl; is a definite contender Sugar Bowl and oops . ' ...' a possible, Babb, and Byron Paul should com spot remains a' big question mark. Gentlemen, for the national crown. Lou Holtz, matchup with Notre Dame. If so, pensate for the loss of All-American Coach John Robinson's top candi fast-talking coach of the Razorbacks, good-bye National Championship. Zac Henderson. Uwe VonSchamann dates are Paul MacDonald, a junior, had an outstanding' debut at 11-1 makes the Sooner kicking game one and'senior WaIt Ransom. Neither last year and this year bodes well. PENN STATE of the best in the country. saw much action in '77. ' Place Ron Calcagni, all-Southwest Con If Switzer can get the Sooners What makes the Trojans a threat ference quarterback, runs the offense The Nittany Li0l1S are coming off concentrating on football and not on is their running backs.' Charles and he is one of the best. When a fine year in 1977 and have visions off-the-field rumors then Oklahoma White is on his way to smashing all throwing he will look for wideouts of bringing the national champion will be powerful. How powerful, ,it SC rushing records and he is backed Robert Farrell, Bobby Duckworth, ship east in 1978. Coach Joe Paterno remains to be seen. When the Sooners up by Dwight Ford, who'rushed for Your Danny Bobo, and tight end Charles is optimistic. With quarterback meet a team than can defense the nearly 800 yards as White's substi Clay. Joining Calcagni in the back Chuck Fusina,' running backs'Matt run, like Arkansas in the Orange tute last year, and by Rod Conners. field are Ben Cowins, Michael' For Sohey, Bob Torrey and, .Booker Bowl, .they could be in big trouble. They run behind the' best, interior rest, and Orange Bowl hero Roland Moore, and receiver Tom Donovan They· have done nothing to shore up line in the nation; They are Pat' Bets' Sales. Everyone in this group is a returning it is easy, to, see why. their passing attack but fortunately Howell (255 Ibs.), Tony Munoz (280 lettennan. Fusina, who Paterno feels is the play no team in the regular season Ibs.), four-year starter Brad Budde On defense eight returners high best he has ever coached, is a strong that can pass. Bowl games are dif (250 Ilis.) and Otis Page (2651bs.). light what will be a stingy Arkansas candidate for' the Heisman' trophy. ferentstories and Oklahoma has a If Robinson can find' another Pat eleven. AII-SWC performers Jim Add: t6 this a sound offensive line weak shot at No. L Hayden' or .Rob Hertel among the ':. Walker, Vaughn Lusby and Larry and you have a strong offense over quarterback hopefuls ,the' offense Jackson head a fine cast. Only t~e all. PITTSBURGH, will, be' explosive. ,The defense will secondary is suspect. Free safety Defensively, Penn State has some be the usual SC-tough. Their'sched Larry ·White must return success holes to fill. The. entire secondary The Pitt Panthers will be back in ule is; however, murderous, featur~ Ralph Clayton. The' offensive line by Jim Trausch fully' from neck surgery or teams must be replaced and' All-American the top ten but : the loss of eight, ing' Texas Tech, Alabama, Michigan they run behind is young but tal , will pass on the Razorbacks. Arkan Randy Sidler is gone. But Matt starters and four All-Americans pre~ State, UCLA, and Notre Dame. The ented. On defense, Michigan must UCLA sas should make it through the SWC ,Miller, Bruce Clark and Joe Lally I, vents them from seriously contend Trojans' are unpredictable; but aren't replace half : of last year's group. , . ~~: schedule undefeated but a loss in the lend stability to' the defensive line. ing for the top.spot this year. Coach quite ready to vie for number one. The entire secondary is inexperi The Bruins, have all the ingredi Cotton Bowl to a team that can pass Overall, Penn .State will be' less Jack Sherrill has Rich Trocano, who encedand will be tested severely in ents needed to bring the national will deny them the national cham exciting, especially without big play quarterbacked three games last year MICHIGAN a September 23rd matchup with championship to' Westwood for the pionship. back Jimmy Cefalo. Their schedule when Cavanaugh was hurt, as his Notre Dame. ' first time since the early fifties. They is rough-road games at Kentucky, , i I top choice to lead the Panther of Last year was the year Michigan Maybe this is the year that Leach boast seven returnees on offense in ALABAMA the only team to beat the Lions last fense. At split end is the dangerous should have won the national cham will put together the passing game. cluding 'Rick Bashore at quarter year, and Ohio State. Notre Dame Gordon Jones, holder of four school pionship. . Unfortunately, Minnesota I don't think so. With the horses Bo back, with James Owens andTheotis The seasons of 1966, 1973, and proved last year that an· early records. The tight end is likely to and Washington forgot' to check has in the backfield it will be' run, Brown'in the running back positions." 1974 were not banner football years season defeat does not put a team be Steve Gaustad. with AP andUPI before they run, 'rim, to the Big Ten, champion The defense is also solid; . Manu in the state of Alabama: For some out of the national championship pic , . On defense the Panthers must re dumped the Wolverines. The loss to ship for the Wolverines. But then it Tuiasosopo and Billy Don Jackson, a. reason they failed to win the national ture, so a loss by Penn State toone build around. the loss of Randy Washington in the Rose Bowl has to: is out to Pasadena where, for the pair, of outstanding tackles" anchor championship. The villain. in ' each of these teams will not be disas Holloway and Bob Jtiry, both All~ be particularly grating to Rick 11th consecutive year, Michigan will the line. They are backed up by Jeff ,case was Notre Dame. Last year was trous. Americans. This is accomplished Leach and Bo Schembechler.Schem- drop its last game. 10 " SCHOLASTIC SEPTEMBER 8, 1978 11 :v

Ten. The reason will be their record. MSU. plays an unbelievable schedule. They' open at Purdue, then play Peop Ie' At 'NO by Theresa Rebeck .. Syracuse, Southern California, Notre Dame, and Michigan. They will lose a couple of those games, but Who is the typical Notre Dame do not be deceived by what may student? According to the Admis seem a poor record for. the Spartans sions Office, the average student is are a fine team. a young man who graduated in the top 10% of his class from: a private college preparatory high school in the midwest and scored· a ,1110 on NOTRE DAME, the Scholastic Aptitude Tests. f' I None of this news is really news. At Notre Dame a National Cham The Admissions Office comes out pionship is like a glass of beer: as with virtually the same set of statis soon as you are, finished with it, tics ,every fall. But what is the aver your thoughts automatically turn to age student actually like? What does another. ,Another national cham he do on weekends? Is he a pre pionship, . however, unlike pouring professional throat or a two-fisted, another beer, is not an' easy task. hardheaded redneck? In an effort to ' Being, the national champion makes answer some of these questions, the orie the target of every' team aspir Scholastic lo(!ated the "average" ing 'for the top spot. Losses .include' Notre Dame Student (according to All-Americans Ken MacAfee, Ross the Admissions Office' data) and Browner,and Luther Bradley. Also found out what it means to be av gone are dependable starters Steve erage at,Notre Dame. McDaniels, Ernie Hughes,' Terry Edmun<:l K. O'Shea' is the typical Eurick, Willie Fry, Ken Dike, Doug Notre Dame student. ,He was born Becker, and kicker Dave, Reeve. and!eared in a rural suburb of Chi-, They will be sorely missed. ,' ' ' cago, 'TIlinois, he graduated, thir < • : ~ , - But the nucleUs back for the Irish teenth in a class of 130 from an aU , ' is excellent and they will once again male,. college preparatory Catholic be, serious contenders. Joe,Montana" high school, and he scored a 570 on a surefire candidate for ·All-Ameri the verbal, and 640 on ,the math can: and, Heisman honors, leads an SAT's. His father and six of his Although he does enjoy football life's simple. pleasures,· such as ' offense . featuring eight returning uncles attended Notre Dame, and his (Ed played tight· end, on his high watching television.. His favorite AP Championship Trophy starters. Joining him in' the : back~ UPI Championship' Trophy grandfather played football under school .team) the. real reason he, program ·is a,', toss-up between field is the explosive running, back Knute Rockne. He is indeed the came to Notre Dame was, he insists, "Three's Company" and "Sixty Min- MICHIGAN STATE tandem of Jerome Heavens' and the offense; moves to one corner mid typical Domer. . to get an education. Ed is double utes"-he' can't decide whether or Vagas Ferguson. Add to~is Jim' Tom Flynn handles the' other. , Over~ Ed "Banana Face" O'Shea is very . majoring in Pre-Law and Nuclear not he likes Suzanne Sommers' legs Since 1967 the Big Ten has been Stone, ,tight end. Kevin Hart, spgt all, 'the secondary is untesied~' open to discussion of his normalness. Physics, a combination major which more than Dan Rather's interview- end Kris Haines, and a solid line. dominated by two teams-Michigan Defending '3. national. champion~ ·.~I guess I'm just your typical wild he, thinks,is extremely practical. ing techniques.' " and Ohio State. This year that trend The offense looks in .' fine shape for, ship is not an easy job,but it is not and crazy guy," he says with a "If I. don't, get into Law, School I Some 'of Ed's other: ,interests in- will end when Michigan State cracks the season; an impossible task. Since the na Steve Martin grin. "I like to,drink, I can work for the government in one .. elude ice hockey, wrestling, boxing, the elite two and replaces Ohio ,Defensively, the line and second tional championship:was established like to play football, and hey, I even of the many <,nuclear plants that and chess., "I like breaking heads," State as runner-up to Michigan. ary have huge gaps to filL An in in 1936, only six teams have suc enjoy studying sometimes." When have been springing, up lately," he " claims this alleged' human beiIlg. , Coach. ,Darryl Rogers, . who jury; to ScottZettek, who seemed cessfully defended., their, croWns. asked what he thought of girls, how- exp!ains. "And if Ido make it as a "But there's nothIng: like 'a. good grabbed Big .Ten.Coach,of the Year ready to, continue, the Irish tradition' They are Minnesota in 1940 and '41, ever, he replied, "Girls?'.'. The sub- lawyer, I figure I can make a for- game of chess' to keep your mind in honors)ast year, eagerly awaits the of outstanding linemen, leaves Mike, Army in ,1944 and .'45, Oklahoma in ject was dropped:, ,tune as a prosecutor for the Envi- shape.": " " , return. of 45' lettermen .. , Among: Calhoun, surrounded by: question 1955 and '56,Alabamain 1964 and His friends dubbed Ed "Banana ronmental.ProtectionAgency."He When asked if he considers him- those are the ,Big, Ten's best quar marks. Jay, Case,. J effWeston, . and '65, Nebraska in 1970' and ".71, and F~lCe;' the 'evening of the. Notre manages his' course 'load, which self a true representative of ,the John Hankerd will have to have big , Dame-Southern, 'California' .• game, might be considered somewhat im- Notre, Dame student body, Ed terback Ed Smith, who holds: vir~ the Irish did it back in 1946'and '47., I' tually all·the. MSU passing marks,. years or the front f9ur will be weak. Jimmy· the: Greek makes the Irish, i when he went to the dining hall and possible by many people (24 iiours) , - laughed.. "The statistics say I am, r ate 83, b~nanasin a row; attempting by throating out Monday ,through and hey, I hear that statistics never and Kirk Gibsen,' a potential All The linebackers are the real co-favorites with Alabama' and' i American. bright ,spot ,on the defense., Bob Arkansas at five ;to' one. A two , to set the world record .for banana Thursday, and drinking himself into lie." His suitemates agree. "When . Defensively, the, Spartans . are Golic, is , the, best middle linebacker; dollar bet on the Irish to win would eating. "Ihadto do ~omethingafter oblivion Friday and Saturday. "Hey, ever I try to' explain the spirit of strong. Gone:isLarry Bethea, Big: in the country. He, is flanked by be a wise choiCe. '- \ agame like that. and food fights are I've got to have some rest and re- Notre Dame to ~y friends back Ten'MVP, but returning are .. lin~ Steve Heimkreiter and Bobby Leo-,. against University policy," he say~. laxation, don't I?" he Points out. home, I just tell'them about Ed," men Melvin Land and Angelo Fields, pold. In the, secondary, Randy Har Jim Trausch,a senior Government' \. "Besides, they waste food." He's not Sundays are set aside for recupera- says one. "He's one hell of a guy." .. linebacker Dan Bass, and, the entire rison, if he can, escape injury,. will major: from Arlington Heights, Illi 'sure if he broke the record or not; tion, although he does' make sure secondary. .' battle Joe Restic for one safety spot nois, is' Scholastic's off-the-track the Guinness Book of World Records he doesn't miss the 10 p.m. Mass. With this biting social commen '. AP and UPI may not agree ·with while Jim Browner holds down the oddsmaker. ' ,This. is his first' cOn has no' statistic for the number of In the midst of his hectic sched- tary, Theresa Rebeck begins her ten my pick of State as one of the Top~ other,"one. Dave Waymer, over from tribution. ' bananas eaten in.a~row.· . 'we,Ed finds.time to enjoy' some of

12 ,SCHOLASTIC SEPTEMBER 8, 1978 13 _~J -

12 ,SCHOLASTIC SEPTEMBER 8, 1978 13 _~J u -

6. One of the most important parts of any winter wardrobe is: a; Mittens Grand~a made for TheLastWord you; b. A scarf Grandma made for by Jake Morrissey you. c. A hat Grandma made for you. . I was 'called a' "p'reppie" today,. d. A lift ticket from a ski resort and it occurred to me that there prominently displayed across really is no definitive test to de the front of your $150 ski IPRE- M'bN\GHT. PRE-M\ON\l,\IT aPRE-M\\)W\GOHT affiE- M\\SN\c-".tt8 termine one's "preppiness." .' parka. The following is a preppie test, designed to determine; once and for 7. Do you sweat? all, whether or not you are one of a. Of course not. that rare breed known as "preppies." b. Well .... c. Profusely. 1. When you were born, were the diapers your mother put on you 8. If your house were on fire, and· decorated with little green alli you had the choice of saving Do you sing? Tap dance? Tell jokes? gators? your "Docksiders" or your little Play the spoons (or any other instrument)? a. Yes. brother, would you save: / If so, your campus needs you. b. No. " a. Your "Docksiders;" your Come up to the Student Union booth little brother is replaceable. Activities Night, September 11 2. Are you ever mistaken, for b. Your little brother. Woody Allen? c. Your little brother, only if I or call 7757 and find out a. Yes. he's wearing your "Dock how to become an overnight success. b. No. siders." Perform at the Nazz.

3. Do you have shirts with a grey 9. Do you play: sweater sewn onto the back and a. Backgammon, of course. ' , shoulders? b. Backgammon, only at cock a. Yes. tail parties. IPO$T-M\nW\GBT. B)$T-M\tlN\Gs-rW PQS\-M\\)NSC:zBTa\OiT-M1nS\GHT • b; No. c .. Checkers.

4. ,Where are the u.s. Tennis 10. Do the number of khakis you Championships held? own: . a. Who cares? 'a.' Exceed the Gross National . b.' Tennis, what's that? Product of' the NATO. al- c .. Leave me alone: liancecountries. . d. Somewhere in the east, I b. ~mbarrass you, since you think. . . don't own any. Opening Sunday, September 10, 12 PM-4 AM . 5. What kind of liquid refreshment Scoring: Give yourself 1 point' for For those who can't study before midnight Darby's Place offers do you enjoy on a casual eve- 1) a; 2) a; 3) a;4) d; 5) c; 6)d; .• ningf . coffee, donuts,. companionship and moral support. 7) a; 8) a or c; 9) a; 10) a; nothing Sunday through' "t.. a. 'Beer. for the rest of the answers. 0-3: b. Milk You're out of "Father'Knows Best"; Thursday. t;:~p."""'-:....----~r=-"'--7 c. A' light. Chablis, with an 4-7: There's hope for'you,try read~ aroma that's aggressive, but ing'the New'Yorker's cartoons; 8-10: not overpowering. ' , welcome to preppiedom.

• 14 SCHOLASTIC

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• 14 SCHOLASTIC

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