MARRIAGE, , REMARRIAGE, CONCUBINES, & JESUS; Another Look for Christians. COPYRIGHT JANUARY 14, 1995 All rights reserved. Portions of this file/document may be posted/published as long as the paragraph of the portion, the paragraph before the portion and the paragraph after the portion are included without any additional breaks or spaces, and the source and author are included with the protion posted/published. Copyright 01/12/96; 11/10/05; 5/13/09; 11/29/10; 3/15/11 (Revised) By L. Tyler SanDiego, CA 92162-0763 http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PolyPolygamyPolygnyNJesus http://groups.google.com/group/BiblicalChristianPolygamyPolygyny http://www.flickr.com/groups/christian_polygamy/ http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=6382095167 http://biblicalmarriagepolygyny.yuku.com/directory

TOPICS: FOREVER CROSS CULTURALLY, FORMAL AND INFORMAL CHRISTIAN , COMMON LAW MARRIAGE, CHRISTIAN DIVORCE, CHRISTIAN REMARRIAGE, CHRISTIAN CONCUBINES, CHRISTIAN POLYGYNY (), RACISM, ETHNOCENTRICITY, AND THE SWEARING OF OATHS

TABLE OF CONTENTS (PLEASE USE YOUR FIND TOOL TO FIND THE CHAPTER BY THE CHAPTER ROMAN NUMERAL)

I. INTRODUCTION: PRIORITIES RECONSIDERED.

II. DIVORCE DEFINED, A Surprise

III. DIVORCE! A PLAGUE AND ITS CONSEQUENCES. IV-A. MARRIAGE AND POLYGYNY FROM GENESIS TO JUDGES

IV-B. MARRIAGE AND POLYGYNY FROM JUDGES TO JESUS

V. MARRIAGE, POLYGYNY, JESUS AND THE APOSTLES

VI. ADULTERY DEFINED: A SURPRISE! ISNT POLYGYNY ADULTERY?

VII. SO, WHAT ABOUT CONCUBINES & POLYGYNY TODAY IN MY COUNTRY?

VIII. ARE POLYGYNISTS AND CONCUBINES LIVING IN ERROR TODAY?

IX. MARRIAGE, CONCUBINES, CIVIL LAW, PERSONAL LIBERTY AND A LOVING CONSCIENCE!

X. DOES GOD FORGIVE BROKEN VOWS, DIVORCE AND ADULTERY?

XI. CAN YOU COME BACK TOGETHER & REMMARY AFTER ADULTEROUS REMARRIAGE?

XII. WHAT ABOUT THE HEALTH QUESTIONS INVOLVED IN SUCH REUNIONS?

XIII. CAN ADULTERY, DIVORCE, VOWS AND REPENTANCE RESULT IN POLYGYNY/?

XIV. ADULTERY, DIVORCE, CONCUBINES, POLYGYNY AND THE UNSAVED.

XV. THE MARRIED MAN WHO WOULD ADD WIVES/CONCUBINES TO HIS "HAREM".

XVI. ARE POLYGYNY & CONCUBINES OPTIONS FOR THE ABANDONED MAN?

XVII. POLYGYNISTS, CONCUBINES AND THE LEADERS OF GOD'S PEOPLE.

XVIII. POLYGYNY & CONCUBINES AND THE WESTERN CHRISTIAN WOMAN.

XIX. WHAT'S WRONG WITH ?

XX. HUSBAND RULE OVER THE WIFE? IF SERVANT- TEACHERS RULE .

XXI. THREE CHEERS FOR ! THE BEST FOR MOST!

XXII. LISTEN TO THE WORD ABOUT VOWS, COVENANTS AND PROMISES

XXIII. BIBLIOGRAPHY

APPENDIX ONE: WHAT MAKES A &/OR A MARRIAGE?

APPENDIX TWO: WHEN ONE SHOULD MARRY AND WHO NOT TO MARRY

APPENDIX THREE: THE PRACTICE OF POLYGYNY IN AN HOSTILE ENVIRONMENT

APPENDIX FOUR: BIBLICAL POLYGYNOUS WEDDING COVENANTS

APPENDIX FIVE: RACISM, INTERRACIAL &/or INTERETHNIC MARRIAGE

This work is dedicated with love and honor to Carol Lynn McIntyre (of Oceanside's Camelot), Beverly Tyler (of Tennessee}, Diane Tava Lovelady (of Santee CA), Lua Nguyen (of Vietnam), Marilyn Tyler (of Canada), Paula D. (of San Diego, CA); Meli Bunnell (of Tepic, Nyarit Mex), and Carmen Guerrero (of Mazatlan, Mex).

This document can be found at the following Yahoo web site: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PolyPolygamyPolygnyNJes us http://biblicalmarriagepolygyny.yuku.com/directory

It is also dedicated to all those who have suffered through divorce and the complexities of remarriage, and to all of the following:

1. The shattered African polygynist husbands and their families who are made to feel like second class citizens in the local church because of their polygyny, made to feel less loved by Christ and made to feel less a child of God by the local "Christians". 2. The broken hearted Chinese polygynist wives and their children in their local churches who are shunned by the "proper Christian" women and made to feel less welcome and spiritually inferior because of their polygynous families. 3. The devastated Burmese polygynist husbands who believe in and have received the Lord Jesus Christ, but who are rejected and shunned by the local "Christian" church/leader because they love their wives too much to divorce them. 4. The grieved, stumbled, offended and broken hearted born-again and Spirit sealed Indian wives and children of the born-again and Spirit sealed husband who loved his wives and children too much to renounce and repudiate them in order to be baptized and accepted by the local"Christian' church, and so now live in Christ, denied fellowship by their local congregation of "Christians". 5. The discouraged Mid-Eastern polygynist husbands who genuinely wanted to know Christ and the fellowship of the saints but who were embittered and kept from saving faith by the campaign of "Christian" leaders/churches against them and their polygyny. It would be no surprise if they were the most active in the community in resisting the Gospel and those who preach it. Talk about closing a door and making an enemy of the Gospel! 6. The troubled Liberian polygynist wives and children who genuinely wanted to know Christ and the fellowship of the saints but who were embittered and kept from saving faith by the campaign of "Christian" leaders/women against them and their polygyny. It would be no surprise if they were the most active in the community in resisting the Gospel and those who preach it. Talk about closing a door and making an enemy of the Gospel! 7. The broken hearted, stumbled, offended and grieved Kenyan polygynist wives and their children whose husbands and fathers were forced to reject and renounce them in order to be baptized and join the local "Christian" church.; especially in the case where a carnal husband used the church rule as an excuse to get rid of a wife and children he didn't want. 8. The disconsolate Pakistani polygynist husbands who are stumbled, grieved, offended and broken in their faith and love for the Lord Jesus Christ because of how badly they and their loved ones have been treated by the local "Christian" leader/church. 9. The grief stricken Bengali polygynist wives and children who are stumbled, grieved, offended and broken in their faith and love for the Lord Jesus Christ because of how badly they and their loved ones have been treated by the "Christian" women of the local church. 10. The miserable Thai polygynist husbands who, with grave doubts and troubled hearts, succumbed to "Christian" pressure to renounce and reject (Malachi 2:13-17) all of their wives except one to satisfy the demands of some misguided "Christian" leader, or association of "Christians". 11. The miserable American Christian woman, a genuine believer in Christ, who divorced her genuinely saved Christian husband for "irreconcilable differences" as her pastor recommended, married a "more godly" man, and now has realized that the Bible says she is maritally bound to her genuinely saved exhusband in the Kingdom of God as long as they both live, making her present marriage adultery - - - and she doesn't know what to do. 12. The miserable American Christian man, a genuine believer in Christ, who was divorced by his genuinely saved Christian wife for "irreconcilable differences" as her pastor recommended, who has gone on and married a "godly" Christian woman, and now has realized that the Bible says he is maritally bound to his genuinely saved exwife in the Kingdom of God as long as they both live, and he doesn't know what to do about the situation.

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I. INTRODUCTION: PRIORITIES AND PARADIGMS RECONSIDERED This study is the result of my own marital experience where I was divorced from my wife and both of us claimed sincerely and earnestly that we were born again believers in the Lord Jesus Christ. I was faced with the question, "What does a Christian do about his/her need to marry when in a divorced-from-one and wanting- to- marrry-another situation, and he believes that he/she and the Christian exmate are bound to each other maritally by the Lord until death parts them?" Or ---- "What does a Christian do in a divorced-from-one and remarried-to-another situation, and he/she believes that he/she and the Christian exmate are bound to each other maritally by the Lord until death parts them?" And the moral question: "Is it adultery or is it something else?"

As I read the papers and listen to the news many questions come to my mind. According to the census department, 40% of Black women never marry. Single parent households abound. Welfare undermines marriage by giving the mother an artificial and unearned financial independence of the father. It gives them the option of being able to have a child without having or needing a husband. It is very difficult for most man to comfortably stay with a woman who doesnt need him and often has a more sure and steady income than he has. Where are the Black men who love and desire these Black women? TV news special after news magazine articles after newspaper articles tell about so many Black men who are in serious trouble with the law. For many this reflects a economically crippling attitude towards authority, society, their families, their women and their children. This crisis for so many Black men, not wanted or needed by their women and rejected by the majority society, is devastating to the Black family. So what is the solution for sincere Black Christians dealing with the issues of divorce and remarriage in this context? I believe this document has some radical but realistic solutions.

What about the of Rwanda, Burundi, Somalia, Viet Nam, Cambodia, Sri Lanka and Bosnia? Are they doomed to a lifelong widowhood, never to remarry because of the scarcity of men? Is remarriage not possible where there are so many more women than men? What kind of life in those countries is a or a single mother doomed to when they are not able to remarry? I believe this document has some radical but realistic solutions for such people, especially if they are of the Judeo-Christian persuasion.

Our relationships with our mates and our children are second in importance and emotional intensity only to our relationship with Jesus. In San Diego's Union-Tribune several months ('95) ago they reported on a study of the effects of divorce that involved thousands and lasted over 20 years. The social scientists screened the participants so that they had two groups that basically differed as follows, one whose parents had divorced or separated and the other group whose parents did not divorce or separate. They found that the average life expectancy was five years longer for the group whose parents did not divorce. Divorce made a five year difference in the life expectancy of the two groups. Dr. Griffith Banning conducted a study of 800 Canadian children.It was reported that their parents' divorce, death or separation, resulting in the children's felt lack of love and affection, did greater damage to their growth and development than disease and all other factors combined.>a [>a Love, by Leo Buscaglia, Fawcett Crest, NY,1972,p.78

What we do with our marital relationships has a profound effect not only on us, but on our children, for a lifetime. We already know that a divorce, statistically, usually results in serious health problems ranging from ulcers and cardiovascular problems to hormonal and emotional problems. Divorce can devastate us and our loved ones. How can we afford to let our marriages, which Jesus intended to arenas filled with love and testimonies of His life changing all-sufficiency, become instead arenas of suffering, bitterness and hatred --- trophies for the enemy of our souls?

Yet look at the relationship most of us have with our loved ones and our God. Most of us live our lives devoid of the life changing power and compassionate cherishing of our living and reigning God. Most of us are falling short of compassionately cherishing our mates and children. We wonder why we dont see the power of God in our lives. Yet how can Jesus bless us miraculously and and powerfully intervene in our lives when we have let