G GEVRJL
The MJ n i by
AVENUE OF AMERICAS MINI COLLECTION HANDMADE* EXCLUSIVE MOTHER OF PEARL Dl!1L *TOP WESSELTON DIAMONDS* LIMITED EDITION OF 500 PCS. PHONE: 845.425.98()2 WWW.GEVRIL.CH It costs nothing to ensure your child has the best of everything.
J.MANN 1444 52ND STREET 13ROOKLYN,NY11219
All PROGRAMS !\RE PERFORMED AT CLIENT'S At Amerikids, our early intervention programs are more than HOME, FREE OF CHARGE AND !NCLUOEo just among the best available in the state, they're also free.
Nii CORE & SUPPLEMENTAL EVALUATIONS That means you get the level of professionalism - and performance that only one of the state's top healthcare i'I SPEECH & LANGUAGE THERAPY providers can deliver, and you get it with no out of pocket cost to you. !lM PHYSICAL & OCCUPATIONAL THERAPY Think about it, a program custom tailored to the unique
tli/f FAMILY AND/OR NUTRITIONAL TRAINING & COUNSELING needs of your child and implemented with an eye towards your child's future-all delivered in the comfort of your own ~ SOCIAL WORK home ... and all for free. And because we're part of the Americare Family of Companies - a company with over two IW SPECIAL INSTRUCTION decades of experience as a leader in healthcare services, you
r$i NURSING know your child is getting the absolute best care possible. If your child is between newborn and age three, and ft Bl-LINGUAL THERAPISTS (Y!DOtSH, needs help with talking, walking, feeding, paying attention RUSSIAN, HEBREW AND OTHER LANGUAGES) or getting along with others, you may be eligible for our free Early Intervention Program. Ne THE PEACE OF MIND THAT COMES FROM WORKING WITH SHOMER SHABBOS, WARM AND CARING THERAPISTS Call us today to give your child the best of everything ... AND PROFESSIONALS today and tomorrow.
EARLY INTERVENTION PROGRAM ex!. 3510
NYC Regional Office: 1100 Coney Island Ave., Brooklyn, NY 11230 Corp. Office: 718·256-6000 Westchester Office: 914-696-3200 www.americareny.com. The early intervention program is funded and regulated by the NY State Dept. of Health, and in NYC by the NYC Dept. of Mental Health, Mental Retardation and Alcoholism Services. You Just Won The.Lottery 0 (For everyone else, there's COPE)
When you need a paycheck-COPE can help. For over twenty-nine years, thousands of companies seeking reliable employees have called COPE first. One of them has a job for you. There are many ways COPE -a free service of Agudath Israel of America-helps people find work: •On-the-job training* • Resume building skills • Pre- interview guidance and advice •Assistance procuring vocational training • Ongoing involvement- long after you' re working So call COPE today. Regardless of your experience, financial need, or professional skills, if you need to make a living COPE can get you started. "l,l"Y')'~nt 'For eligible applicants CopG"~Trammg funded through the NYC Department of Small Business Services. A Division of Agudath Israel of America Community Services 212.809.5935 Shevat 5764 • February 2004 U.S.A.$3.50/Foreign $4.50 ·VOL XXXVII/NO, 2
THE JEWISH OBSERVER (ISSN) 0021- 6615 is published monthly except July and August by the Agudath Israel of America, 42 Broadway, New York, NY10004. Periodicals postage paid in New York, NY. Subscription $24.00 per year; two years, $44.00; three years, $60.00. Outside of the United States (US funds drawn on a US bank only) $12.00 surcharge per year. Single 36 copy $3.50; foreign $4.50. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to; The Jewish Observer, 42 Broadway, The New Ideology in Health Care ... And How NY; NY 10004. Tel: 212-797-9000, Fax: 646-254-1600. Printed in the U.S.A. to Survive it, Rabbi Mordechai Biser 12 Working at Tefilla, Ovadya Hertzberg RABBI NISSON WOLPIN, EDITOR
EDITORIAi. BOARD RABBI JOSEPH ELIAS Chairman CONFRONTING THE DANGERS OF THE INTERNET - REVISITED RABBI ABBA BRUDNY 19 JOSEPH FRIEDENSON I. Reactions and Responses, Reader's Forum RABBI YISROEL MEIR KIRZNER 24 RABBI NOSSON SCHERMAN II. Out of the Mouths of Our Children PROF. AARON TWERSKI The Hazards of the Internet as Experienced DR. ERNST L BODENHEIMER Z"L by Our Teenagers, Rabbi Shmuel Gluck RABBI MOSHE SHERER Z"L Founders 28 Reader's Forum
MANAGEMENT BOARD 3 0 Ill. Over Our Shoulders and Looking Ahead, Reader's Forum AVI FISHOF, NAFTOLI HIRSCH ISAAC KIRZNER, RABBI SHLOMO LESIN NACHUM STEIN SECOND LOOKS RABBI YOSEF C. GOLDING Managing Editor 32 "No" to Interfaith Dialogue, Yonoson Rosenblum Published by Agudath Israel of America INSIGHTS AND IMPRESSIONS U.S. TRADE DISTRIBUTOR ISRAELI REPRESENTATIVE Feldheim Publishers lntnl. Media Placement 200 Airport Executive Park POB 7195 197 Jaffa Road Ni!nuet, NY 10954 Jerusalem 94340, ISRAH 34 Blessings, Mrs_ Esther Wagner ;rv
BRITISH REPRESENTATIVE BELGIAN REPRESENTATIVE 36 The Bicycle at the Beginning of Time, Mrs. Sarah Shapiro M.T. Bibelman Mr. E. Apter Grosvenor Work> Lange Kievitstr. 29 46 Blocked View, Mrs. Nechama Ginzberg Mount Pleasant Hill 2018 Antwerp London E'> 9NC, ENGLAND BELGIUM
FRENCH REPRESENTATIVE SOUTH AFRICAN POETRY Rabbi Bamberger REPRESENTATIVE 21 Boulevard Paixlwns Mr. V. Taback 57000 Met;; PO Bo~ 51552, FRANCE Raedene. Johannrsburg 38 Shattered Memories, Etka Gitel Reich 2124 SOUTH AFRICA SWISS REPRESENTATIVE Mr. S. Feldinger Leiman>tras>e 3& BOOKS IN REVIEW 4051 Basel, SWITZERLAND THE JEWISH OBSERVER does not 40 Facing Current Challenges, by Dr, Yehuda Levi, assume responsibility for the Kashrus of any product, reviewed by Rabbi Moshe Eisemann publication, or service advertised in its pages
© Copyright 2004 43 Letters-to-the-Editor
February 2004 VOLUME XXXVll/NO. 2 Rabbi Mordechai Biser
1n• Health Care ...... AND HOW TO SURVIVE IT
An elderly man with health problems that very little could be done to save her, inroads in medical schools and hospi was admitted to a major teaching hospi and that the best case scenario was that tals across the country. tal. His son was shocked to find that a DNR the lvon1an lvould survive as "a vegetable," The new thinking in medical circles, (do not resuscitate) order had been entered so there was no reason to put her on life often expressed in terms of the need to on his father's medical chart. In response support. At the Rav's instructions, the "ration resources;' essentially seeks to jus to the son's inquiry, the attending physi daughter insisted that her mother be put tify letting patients die solely on the basis cian said that the patient had to/.d the doc on a ventilator. The woman revived, 1valked of the doctor's personal view that a tor that he wanted a DNR order. The son by herself out of the hospital two days later, patient's "quality oflife" is so diminished insisted that his father, being an Orthodox and went on to live another four years. as to no longer be a life worth living. Dr. few, would want to be resuscitated if his David Hoffman, a medical oncologist life were in danger. Neither the son nor the THE NEW IDEOLOGY who serves as Assistant Professor at Albert doctor had anything in writing from the Einstein Medical Center and attending patient, who was now incapable of com hese two true stories, recounted physician at Einstein Moutefiore municating his desires. The son managed by Rabbi Reuven Drucker of the Medical Center-and is thus well to get his father's care transferred to anoth TAgudath Israel of Highland Park placed to know how doctors and resi er physician, who removed the DNR order at a roundtable discussion at the recent dents view end-of-life issues-reported and treated the patient. The father recov Agudath Israel of America convention, at the Agudah convention that many res ered, and had no recollection ofany DNR highlight a growing danger facing obser idents and younger doctors now open conversation with a doctor. vant Jews in health care facilities across ly advocate this new approach. Dr. the country. While many people were Hoffman added that many hospitals have An elderly woman was found uncon shocked recently at how doctors and already adopted actual guidelines defin scious and rushed to the hospital. The judges sought to aid and abet the ing quality of life that govern when to examining doctor told the woman's demise of Terri Schiavo, a brain-dam intervene and when not to, and that med daughter that her mother was close to death, aged woman in Florida whose husband ical schools are teaching this material to sought to end her life by depriving her doctors-to-be. Concludes Dr. Hoffinan, Rabbi Biser, Esq. is Associate General Counsel of food and water, the reality is that the "These disturbing trends. .. have made of Agudath Israel of America. His article, and will make more inroads into our "Shal01n Bayis. The Need for Formal Hadracha," thinking that motivated those medical appeared in JO, June '01. and legal experts has made major medical. .. practice."
6 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 BEHIND THE NEW THINKING er condition for transplant purposes if THE TORAH PERSPECTIVE doctors have to wait for a patient's heart ne of the major forces driving the to stop beating, Drs. Robert Troug and here do we, as Torah Jews, new ideology is economics. As Walter Robinson of Harvard Medical stand on this issue? The argu 0 explained at the Agudah con School propose allowing doctors to W ments that what matters is vention roundtable by Betzalel Stern, a remove organs from patients "who are "quality oflife" and that people are enti Managing Partner at Strategic either neurologically devasted or immi tled to "death with dignity" can sound Healthcare Solutions and former Chief nently dying." Writing in Critical Care compassionate, ethical, and at times Financial Officer at Maimonides Medicine, 2003, 1roug and Robinson compelling. To take the extreme case, why Medical Center, most hospitals get a sub attempt to justify their homicidal pro maintain the "vegetable" existence (a stantial percentage of their funding posal by claiming that we already take highly objectionable word which itself from government, which pays "per the organs of those declared brain dehun1anizes a person) of someone in stay" and not per day, with strict con dead, which, they admit, is a highly ques an irreversible co1na? straints on the length of each stay tionable definition of death. 1 For one thing, as pointed out in the based on the patient's diagnosis and treat In short, as Wesley). Smith, lawyer for introduction to this article, the doctors ment. "Discharge planners" at hospitals thus subtly, if not directly, influence health care decisions, not only about when to 1111 discharge patients, but if and when to withdraw life support, nutrition, and t is not for family members or doctors hydration. But economics alone does not Ito decide that a patient has "suffered explain the widespread acceptance of the view that it is legitimate for doctors to enough," and therefore should not seek, by inaction or action, to hasten a patient's death. That position is the prod uct of a culture that has largely aban receive medical treatment. doned the religious worldview of previous generations. If one believes on 1111 some level that the ultimate purpose of life is merely to maximize pleasure and the International Task Force on are occasionally wrong. Medical tech minimize pain, that true happiness is Euthanasia and Assisted Suicide, observes nology is far from infallible, and all the dependent on physical comfort or at least in his book The Culture ofDeath," [T] he more fallible are the technicians and physical activity, and that a person's attitude that it is better to die than to live physicians who attempt to make defin intrinsic worth is measured by his eco cognitively disabled has triumphed so itive predictions and diagnoses. That nomic and social productivity, then the completely in our medical culture that there are people walking around today new medical thinking follows logically. some doctors now report a rush to write who were once diagnosed as about to die There is no good reason, in this view, for off newly unconscious patients as dis or in an irreversible coma should give a person in pain with a terminal illness, posable, and consign them to death by pause to anyone contemplating "pulling or permanently confined to a hospital cutting off life support before they have the plug" on a life support system. bed and connected to machines that help a chance to recover:'We have heard reports More importantly, even where there him breathe, or in an "irreversible" coma, of pressure from hospital bureaucrats to is no likelihood that the person will fully or indeed anyone who will never again have elderly patients sign "do not resus recover, we believe deeply that there is be able to put in a day at the office or citate" (DNR) orders when they are admit value to every precious moment of even a few hours on the golf course, to ted, thus giving their doctors free legal human life, conscious or unconscious, continue to live. reign to let them die. It is therefore not a value that cannot be perceived, let alone The next step, one fears, is that death alarmist to state that the lives of elderly understood, by the world of modern it,elf will, in effect, be medically and legal and disabled patients are at risk in many medicine. As my colleague Rabbi Avi ly redefined so as to rationalize further health care facilities today. Shafran has written, steps to cut short the lives of the elder 1 Indeed: T;~ug and Robi1;~-;;n's an;lysis of brain Suicide is regarded by Jewish law as ly and disabled. Some respected medical death provides medical support for the position a sin, and "pulling the plug'' of a patient experts) albeit still a minority voice in taken by leading poskim that brain death is not on life-support machinery, even where their profession, have publicly called for a halachically acceptable definition of death. See natural death is imminent, is consid also Gary Greenberg, "As Good as Dead: Is There a move in this direction. Noting that Really Such a Thing as Brain Death?" The New ered the taking of a life. All the Torah's many organs will no longer be in prop- Yorker, August 13, 200 I. laws, with the exception only of the
The Jewish Observer, February 2004 7 three cardinal laws (idolatry, sexual 1111 In this regard, Rabbi). David Bleich immorality and murder), are put aside writes of visiting an elderly relative in crit when life - even for a limited period here are a ical condition and in a coma on an Erev - is in the balance. Shabbos. He examined the patient's Whence comes Judaism's exquisite number of things medical chart and saw that his relative valuation of even moinentary human T was not being treated aggressively. The 1ife? A likely reason lies in a recogni that one can do attending physician informed him that tion pondered by far too few, and far this was because the doctors were unan too infrequently .... Ours is a culture, to protect one's imous in their opinion that the patient's after all, where human worth is often condition was ter111inal, and they saw no measured by intellectual prowess or point in trying to prolong her life. Rabbi mercantile skills - even by things like parents and Bleich insisted as a matter of halacha that youth or physical beauty, or the capac she be administered the appropriate med ity to convincingly impersonate a real oneself ... ication. When he returned on Shabbos or fictional character, or to strongly and afternoon to the hospital, he was told that accurately hit, kick or throw a ball. 1111 the patient remained totally unrespon The too-little-pondered recognition sive. He nonetheless went to her hospi is that the true value of men and tubes and monitors? tal bed and greeted her with a loud" Gut women lies elsewhere entirely, in men's Not even lack of consciousness, at Shabbas:' Her eyebrows flickered, and she and women's potential to do good least as medically defined, need hinder quietly responded" Gut Shabbos:' Rabbi things - to prepare, in fact, for an exis what humanly matters most. We Bleich recounts that at that moment there tence beyond the one we know. "When choose to take electronic brain activ flashed in his mind the comment of that idea - self-evident to some, chal ity as evidence of being meaningfully Rabbi Akiva Eiger ( Orach Chayim lenging to others - is interna1ized, a very conscious, of the ability to think and 271:1) that even the simple, standard different sensibility emerges. And choose, and then proceed to conclude Shabbos greeting expressed by one Jew among the perceptions it affords is that that in the absence of such evidence, to another constitutes a fulfillment of the there is immeasurable value in human those abilities must no longer exist - mitzva of Zachar es Yam HaShabbos life itself - even in its minutes and sec without a thought (at least a conscious le'kadslw. "At that moment I realized not onds, and even when it is fettered by one) of the immense tautology we have only intellectually, hut also emotional infirmity, immobility or depression. embraced.2 We do not know, cannot ly, that every moment of life is of ines Basketball or dancing may no know, when a human being is truly ti1nable value. Here was a dra1natic longer be options in the confines of a incapacitated - when his or her soul unfolding of the lesson that every hospital bed, and even tending to one's has been released. Only when a heart moment of life carries with it the most basic physical needs may be has stopped beating can we be certain opportunity for the performance of yet impossible without help. But are acts that life in its truest sense has ended. one more mitzva." 3 there of sheer will - like forgiveness, And so hastening or abetting the For the family and friends of the repentance, acceptance, commitment, death of even a physically or emo patient, there is also profound value in love, or prayer - any harder to accom tionally coin promised human being is prolonging life that can't be measured plish, or any less meaningful? Are they no less an abortion of ineaningful life or even fully described except by those compromised in any way by tangles of than gunning down a healthy one. living through the experience."! felt so close to my mother when I visited her in the hospital in the days after the doc- 2 Studies of those dee1ned to be in "persistent veg etative states" have discovered significant 1ncntal activity and levels of conscious thought and action. See Carl Zin1n1er, "\Vhat if There is So1nething Going ()n in There?': 1\Jcw York Ti111cs Magazine, Septcn1ber 28, 2003, which reports that "a vast number of people who inight once have been con ELI SCI-IOSTAK, C.S.W sidered vegetative actually have hidden reserves of 1nental activity." Children, Adolescents, Adults 3 J. David Bleich, "The Quinlan Case: A Jewish Perspective," Jewish Life, \Vinter J 976. 1 Sd10ol lssnes " Parent - Cbilcl Conflict " .Marriage Counseling ' Rabbi Becker adds that his n1other lived close to two years at hon1e unaided, after doctors said Brooklyn, New York 917-930-5793 New Office in Philadelphia, PA she would no longer have any cognitive func tioning.
8 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 tors counseled us to give up hope," says enccd in these n1atters. ·rhere are cir HOW TO SURVIVE my colleague Rabbi Labish Recker. cun1stances vvhere a poscik inay deter "Every 1non1ent with her was truly pre n1ine that a particular course of 111edical ow, given the new health care cious. ()ur older children got to kno\V trcatn1ent is not required or not advis ideology, can we best protect our their Bubby hctter, and have n1en1ories able, such as where the risks of the pro H parents, our relatives, ourselves? that our youngest \vill unfortunately cedure are high, or even in son1e cases J-I The Jewish Observer, February 2004 9 Professor of Medicine at Chicago doctors who don't subscribe to the new Medical School and Member of the medical ideology, and who will vigorously Ethics Committee at Mount Sinai strive to preserve and prolong their Hospital in Chicago, stated at the con patients' lives. vention roundtable that the first step for all prospective patients (which is all of 3. Make sure you have an advocate. us6) is to contact Agudath Israel of Betzalel Stern, cited earlier, says that Child Development America (212-797-9000) to obtain and it is vital in this new environment for complete an Agudath Israel Halachic family members to be the patient's vig Specialists serving Living Will. Dr. Sokol added, "It literal orous advocate. The reality, says Mr. ly can and has saved lives." Stern, is that "patients rwho] ... have fam infants/toddlers What is the Halachic Living Will and ily members [who J ... are not available how does it work? This legally binding do not get the same kind of treatment and their families document enables an individual to in institutions as patients whose advo designate an agent to make health care cates are available." This is true not only decisions, should the signer become for patients who cannot speak for unable to make or communicate his own themselves, but for everyone who is wishes. The Halachic Living Will stip admitted to a medical facility. It is thus ulates that all health care decisions are wise to designate as health care proxy in to be made in accordance with halacha, the Halachic Living Will someone who to be determined in consultation with will vigorously and aggressively act to the Orthodox rabbi designated in the ensure that the patient's wishes are car document. The basic text of the ried out-not someone who will be eas Halachic Living Will was reviewed and ily swayed by pronouncements from approved by leading poskim, and newly anyone in a hospital wearing a white jack updated and revised Halachic Living et. Mr. Stern adds that it is important for Wills are now available for many states. family members of a patient to consult As Jonathan Rikoon, Esq., a partner in with many advisors (rabbi, lawyer, other the Trusts and Estates Department in the doctors) rather than on relying on one New York law firm of Debevoise & doctor's diagnosis and suggested course Plimpton, who helped develop the of treatment. 7 Agudath Israel Halachic Living Will, Evaluation &Therapy at our center emphasized at the convention round 4. Stay on good terms with siblings and table, the Halachic Living Will "is relatives. or in the privacy of your home intended to be a legally binding docu Aside from the general Torah obliga Bi-Lingual Services Available ment that doctors and hospitals must tion ofloving one's brothers, there is yet respect. No Orthodox Jew should be an additional reason to strive to remain All Services are Free of Charge without one." on good terms with siblings: otherwise, Rabbinic authorities - among disputes over a parent's health care can them Rabbi Yaakov Perlow, arise. This is especially important where Executive Offices: Novominsker Rebbe and Rosh 4228 Tenth Avenue Agudath Israel - concur that obtain 6 ln almost all states, anyone 18 years old or older Brooklyn. New York I 1219 ing and signing a Halachic Living Will can make a valid Halachic Living Will. No one likes is a vital requirement. to think about it, but incapacitating accidents and Queens Office: illnesses can happen to anyone at anytime, and 70-14 141stStreet therefore no one should take the approach of"I'll Flushing, New York 1136 7 2. Pick doctors who will respect and wait until I'm old" to obtain and sign a Halachic carry out your wishes. Living Will. 7 For example, at Agudath Israel we occasional SERVING BROOKLYN, QUEENS, In addition to executing a Halachic Living Will, Mr. Rikoon advises indi ly receive calls fron1 distraught relatives that doc STATEN ISLAND & MANHATTAN viduals to take steps now to ensure that tors are about to ren1ove a patient declared brain dead from life support systems. Despite the hos~ they and their loved ones will receive the pita] adn1inistrator's usual initial insistence that medical care and treatment that is nothing legally can be done to stop this, in each 718•972t:Q88Q needed by choosing physicians and case in New York State that has come to our atten health care facilities that will be respon tion, we have been able to persuade the hospital's legal counsel to order that life support be main sive to their wishes. There are many good tained until the patient's heart stopped beating. 10 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 the person named as health care proxy water. The patient continued to live until that a genial postcard or at least an is not necessarily sensitive to halachic con the time chosen by the Ribbono Shel Olam e-mail once every week from the more cerns, as well as in cases where there is for him to leave this world, rather than observant sibling can have a tremendous no health care proxy and one's siblings dying of dehydration earlier. 9 impact on improving such relationships. are not religiously observant. In this and many si1nilar situations, In one case in which Agudath Israel was the dispute could possibly have been VENISHMARTEM ME'OD consulted, an elderly man living in Ohio' avoided had the observant child taken LENAFSHOSEICHEM was diagnosed as having Alzheimer's. His steps earlier to have himself or herself non-religious daughter felt that he would appointed the health care proxy. Non he bottom line is that despite the not have wanted to live in such a condi Orthodox parents who might be reluc new ideology in health care, there tion, and planned to "let him die" by not tant to sign a Halachic Living Will might Tare a number of things that one providing him with nutrition and hydra be more amenable to a standard health can do to protect one's parents and one tion. His Orthodox daughter contacted us care proxy that names the Orthodox child self long before anyone enters a medical for help. What made this situation diffi as proxy. Failing that, building and main facility. Our Torah commands us to guard cult was that the man had signed a stan taining a better relationship between sib and protect our health, and taking the dard living will, which stated that he did lings, in addition to fulfilling a vital mitzva steps outlined above are now part of the not wish his life prolonged if he became in its own right, can go a long way toward way we need to fulfill this mitzva. terminally ill. We helped find an attorney preventing tbese type of disputes. Even Living in a society in moral freefall, which for the Orthodox daughter, and put the in situations where relations are increasingly devalues life and seeks to has lawyer in touch with a doctor recon1- strained, Rabbi Shmuel Elchonon Brog ten death, we can and must do everything mended to us by the Alzheimer's of Yeshiva Rabbi Chaim Berlin suggests within our power to embrace life. • Association. The doctor was prepared to 8 Saine facts have been change Visa and Mastercard accepted The Jewish Observer, February 2004 II Ovadya Hertzberg . NSHIPWITH eildow~d with the capacity to beseech Proper Tefilla HASHEMTHROUGH TEFILLA Hakadosh Baruch Hu through tefil/a, why do we ask tzaddikim to be mispallel on ut the key is proper tefilla. First, let i1?!:1n 'f'l) tli1'!n N7N: t:l'))'V'l) 1'N ... ?Ni\?.» our behalves, whether it be for a refua us establish what proper tefilla is nvp::n - " [Bnei] Yisroel ... are saved sheleima (complete recovery) for an ail Bnot. It is not viewing davening as only through [the power of] their ing loved one, or a shidduch for a child, a burden, to be gotten over with so one mouths, by prayer and request" or any other consequential matter? can get home to breakfast and The New (Rashi, Bamidbar 31,8). 1'he answer to both questions is that York Times before heading off to work. tefilla does not operate in a vacuum. The It is not 1nindless recitation of prayers, 'il ov:::i llnlN'l, D'D1o:i n7N1 :i:ri:i n?N closer a person's relationship with the with the mind focused elsewhere. And 1'~1l 1l'p':>N - "These Itrust J in the Rib/Jona shel Olam, the greater the effi it is not rushing through the davening at chariot, and these in horses, but we cacy of his tefillos. Due to his Torah and breakneck speed, where kavana and cor pray in the Name of Hashem our rnitzvos, a tzaddik naturally experiences rect pronunciation fall by the wayside. G-d" ( Tehillim 20,8). a special connection to fiashen1. Just as (This is not 1neant as a disparagement hile other nations believe that a king will grant a request from one of of today's overburdened generation. Lack their military might ensures his close advisors far more readily than of kavana is an old, long-standing W them victory, Yisroel knows he will respond to a petition from one problem.)' that it has no need of tre1nendous armies of his plain subjects, so, too, does Rather, proper tefilla is an exacting, or horrific weapons. On the contrary, the Hashem hearken more quickly to the sup concentration-demanding and exhila attitude of" Ko chi ve'otzem yadi - [My plication of a tzaddik. Thus, his tefillos rating experience. And that requires hard achievements are the result of] my for our welfare are particularly desirable work. There is an expression: tefilla strength and the might of my hand" (Nefesh Hachayim 2,15 and 2,10). bimkom avoda- literally, "prayer instead (Devarim 8,17) is the surest path to But each and every member of Kial of work;' a reference to the Te1nple serv Yisroel's downfall. The only weapon Yisroel, on his own level, possesses ice (avoda) being replaced by tefilla after Yisroel needs is its ko'ach ha'tefilla, the ko'ach ha'tefilla. And the potency of tefilla, f-]~~~fos in ~:;;~-bb7i~-1-J8b d/h. "Jy~;1 ·1~(illa" quote power of prayer. when done properly, is that it can a Ycrushaln1i (Bernchos 17b) in which Rav Fro1n where does this aweso1ne power improve every person's relationship Masniya examines, "I'in grateful to my head, for stem? And if every member of Kial Yisroel with Hashem, thereby promoting an esca when I reach Modin1, it bows on its own accord!" lating cycle of increasingly meaningful The Mechaber (98,2), too, states that our kavana is not satisfactory. Nevertheless, our job is to work Ovadya Hertzberg, fonncrly of Nc\v York City, tefillos, and - commensurately - an lives in Jerusalem, This is his first appearance in as hard as we can to must the n1axin1um arnount these pages. increasingly closer bond with Hashem. of kavana that we're capable of. 12 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 the destruction of the Beis Hainikdash. everyone's lifetin1e. But one should ers." That person clearly did not under· Unfortunately, for many, it means tefilla strive to set a routine that honors the stand or appreciate the potential of his [by rote] instead of work[ing on mak ideal: Con1e on tin1e, with "on time" tcfilla. ing tejilla meaningful.] being defined as early enough to put on There are over 1,800 words in Pcsukei But working at tefilla is precisely what tefillin, say Korbanos in full, and com· Dezilnra fron1 "Mizrnor shir chanukas is needed to elevate a person's davening 111encc Pcsukei Dezhnra together with the habayis" until the end of" Yishtabach:' fron1 the 1nundane to the subli1nc. kahal.2 And how laudable it would be if If you complete Pesukei Dezimra in 10 "Le'ahava es Hashen1 Elokeichen1 u'le'av one could arrive a few 1non1ents before n1inutes, you're racing along at the rate do bechol levavchcm - To love Hashem the start of Mincha and Maariv to clear of over 180 words per 111inute, or n1ore your G-d and to serve Hin1 with all your one's head of business matters and all than three words per second.'1 I-Iow inuch hearts" (Deva rim l ],13). Regarding other distractions, and focus on the kavana can be obtained in such pressure this, the c;emora co1nn1ents: "Eizuhi upcoming tefilla. 1 cooker circumstances?5 Moreover, is avoda shehi baleiv? I-lavei on1eir zu that called "be'nachas'? And is it possi tcfilla - V\/hich Iform of] service is Icon· ble to pause between sin1ilar letters and ducted] in the heart? Tefilla" ( Taanis 2a). sounds at that speed? The Torah's choice of the word u'le'av· These words are being written dur· do to designate tefilla is significant. The ing the Asseres Yemei Teshuva. It is bit lesson being imparted is that we need to terly ironic that, at this time of the year, work, both at our overall attitude and when we are striving to improve our approach to tefilla, as well as at its var • selves, there see111s to be a dispropor ious aspects and co1nponents (Shela, abbi Chaim tionate number of instances of"There's Inyanci Tcfilla 8). While the assignment Kanievsky asserts the bell · and they're off:' - After is challenging, it is a n1ost rewarding one R "Shem a Ko lei nu" in Selichos. - That part when one acts upon it. that one is required of the Avoda on Yorn Kippur which the congregation says silently. - Just after that, The Early Davener Gets the Benefit to be an expert in the fourteen or so tefillos beginning with "Ashrei ayin ra'asa kol zos." -And then, he chasiddi111 harishonin1 - the Hilchos Tefilla, and on Motza 1 ei Yo111 Kippur, son1e people early pious ones - arrived for tefilla that learning these seen1 to want to undo, chas veshalom, the T an hour early in order to achieve impact of the day by rushing through the proper state of 1nind) and then dav halachos takes Maariv. 6 ened for an additional hour (Mis/ma, Attitude is everything. Someone who Berachos 5, l ). They would then devote precedence over all i Mish ;;~·13~;;~·;;;··9 3, (J)·:-i~};-~J~·~ st r i~'t.. J~ll~-;: ~ftJ~-~ yet another hour to contemplative n1ed lav.', one is obligated to arrive before the start of itation of their tefilla (Berachos 32b; other learning! davening the a1nount of time it takes to walk 8 Nefesh Hachayim 2,14). And they did all tcfachi1n - less than I second! 3 this three times a day! With nine hours See Shulclwn Aruch, Orach C'1ayi1n 98, 1 & 93,2. 4 a day spent in shul, when did they have The Chafetz Chairnwritcs in Taras Halmyis (2,(3)) • that a person learning Torah can say 200 words time to learn and work? The Gen1ora a 1ninute. I asked Rabbi Chaim Kanievsky, s/1/i~ explains that they merited a special ta, whether that 1neant that a person could also beracha in their "Iorah study and their When the Loser Wins dm'cn 200 words per 1ninute. I Ie replied that that efforts to earn a living (ibid.). was not necessarily so. His reasoning cannot be It is not feasible to emulate them, of gone into here. ((we do not say Pesukei 5 course (Mishna Baura 93,(1)), but we Dezirnra in rushed fash There is a certain segment of the population that intentionally davcnsquickly, in order to mini1nize surely want to avoid being branded their ion; rather [we say them] maclzshavos zaros-- foreign thoughts. Unless you exact opposite. Someone who rushes into unhurriedly (be'nachas)" (Mechaber have a specific pesak given to you by your rebbe, shut when the tzibbur is already halfway 51,8). "One should not skip anyword[s], however, the ruling of the Merhaber and Mishna through Pesukei Dezimra, frantically puts nor swallow them; instead he should utter Berun1 makes it clear t!uit davening slowly takes precedence. on his tefillin, races through the daven· then1 as if he were counting coins" 6 The only plausible-sounding excuse ever prof and then) having "paid his dues," 51,(20) ). ing, (Mishna Berura, fered is that fOr elderly people, even a fevv inin begins removing his tefillin during Many years ago, I mentioned the utes could be vital. It does not hold water. These Ashrei/Uva leTziyon, de111onstrates an above to an individual who took second individuals have the option of davening ahead appalling lack of respect and apprecia place to no one in his speed of daven· and/or leaving early, if necessary. But the kahal 1nust not sacrifice the quality of its tefilla. Of course, tion for tefilla. ing. His response? "Well, some people a 111inya11 comprised entirely or even largely of sen Yes, there are e111ergency situations in count their money differently than oth- ior-citizens is a different story. The Jewish Observer, February 2004 13 appreciates the power of proper tefilla pletion?7 (If you still need to be remind remembered to say "vesein tal urnat will want to make more time for it. ed to turn off your cellphone before you tar livracha," or if he forgot to say enter the sanctity of the Beis Haknesses, "Ya'aleh veyavo." And looking into a II. PERSONALIZING OUR TEFILLOS then this article has failed to make an Siddur and following the sheliach impact on you.) tzibbur will help one to be aware of f a person finds the opportunity to The Ari zal davened from a Siddur what one is answering A1nein to. approach and communicate with so that he could have intense kavana, If you find yourself being distracted I Hashem truly meaningful, then it is and so that he would not swallow by outside thoughts, imagine to your incumbent upon him to devote himself [even] a vowel (Mishna Berura self (convincingly!): "Hashem is stand exclusively to that pursuit without 93,(2)). Most, if not all, people could ing directly in front of me, listening allowing anything to distract him from benefit from following his example. In attentively to every word I say, and it. And what better first step to take than addition to in1proved kavana and appraising the thoughts accompanying to make a commitment not to talk in shul enunciation, a person will also be my davening' (Shela, Jnyanei Tefilla 7). from the start of daveninguntil its com- much less likely to wonder if he Daily Opportunities hroughout the day, we are presented with opportunities to reinforce our Tawareness of our dependence upon VISION. Hashe1n, and to deepen our appreciation of His munificence to us. VVhen a person wakes up, he can groggily recite "Modeh ROWTH. ant without being mindful of what he is saying, or he can take the time to remem ber that he should not take for granted the EXCELLENCE. gift of life that Hashem has renewed for him that morning. Prior to saying "Asher n we first opened our doors, we set out to build a first class, out~ yatzar;' think of those who require a of~town yeshivah ~ including a mesivta, hais midrash and koUel. We catheter, or have other problems with their selected only superb mechanchim for our limudei kodesh staff. We bodily functions. 8 Something to which one accepted the applications of only the finest talmidim, high caliber bnei Torah normally does not give a thought should \vi th excellent midas and a desire to "shreig'' in learning. We established a solid actually elicit feelings of gratefulness on Regents~accredited general studies progra1n. And the Mesivta flourished. one's part.9 Since then, we expanded our facilities twice. Finally, we purchased a large Birchos Hashacharoffer a virtual cat building and launched a c MESIVTA & BAJS MEDRASH OF' must be because I'm not saying 'Asher yatzar' with enough kavana!" he concluded. This inci lvfL'\J'\JJ1ATIAN BEL'\~H dent provides an incredible insight into the power of Asher yatzar. 9 Obviously, this idea, as well as some of the ones to follow, does not apply to someone who does suffer fron1 these problems, Such a person needs to focus on other reasons to be thankful to Hashem. 14 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 gratitude to Hashc1n and his fervor in An entire siman of Shulchan Aruch - responding to the Name of Hashem being reciting this beracha would increase Siman Rei-is devoted to kavanas Hashem, said - must be formed before uttering His immeasurably. And anyone whose back the kavanos one must have when uttering Name ( Rabbeinu Bechaye, Vayikra 24,10 ). has ever gone out on him need only recall Hashem's names. The Siddur Kavanas The translation of Baruch as Source of the pain and crippling effects to arouse Hashem offers an excellent solution for those all berachos is explained in the main article. genuine appreciation \vhen saying the who have difficulty visualizing the required The Aramaic translations of Baruch (i.e., beracha of"Zokei{kefufim" (Makes the kavanos. 1-Iowever, such a siddur is not Berich) and Hashem'sNames needs the same bent upright). always available, and it also doesn't include kavana as their LashonKodesh counterparts; Before reciting the beracha of leha the kavanosfor Baruch and Amein. The fol Hashem's Name written,,.,.,.. means only niach tefillin or any other birchas mitz lowing solution addresses those deficien '7.:ITTJl'll'!· (He is) the Master of all. The Vilna va, reflect for a moment how fortunate cies. Gaon holds that even l'l·l·l'I-' requires you are that Hakadosh Baruch Hu cre On a piece of white cardboard approx - kavana only of'>:l:i Jl'll'!, He concurs, how ated you a Jew who has the opportuni imately 1 1/2 inches wide by 2 112 inches ever, that in the passuk of Shema Yisroel ty to be mekayein1 tnitzvos. long, write the kavanos as provided below. (including its recital when taking out the With what appears to be prescient Some may not feel it necessary to include Torah from the aron kodesh, and in insight, Rabbi Meir Simcha of Dvinsk, the headings (suchas1'tl), or the English Tachanun on Mondays and Timrsdays), who wrote the Mcshcch Chachma in translations. Modify it to suit your own kavana of-~nmtm is also' necessary. 11 approximately 1862 (though it was not needs. Seal it with high-quality transpar All forms of Elokim, such as Elokai and published until 1927, a year after his pcti ent tape. Insert it in a bus pass holder, and Elokainu, need the same kavana. ra), described the Jew in galus: When he place it in your shirt pocket. (In order to 7-Nis not a form of Elokim. (See Rashi, becomes too comfortable in his host be able to enter a bathroom with it, it must Shemos 34,6.) Care must be taken not to country, he learns its language, is affect - be inside a kli besoch kli (Mechaber40,2 & have the kavanos under discussion when ed by its decadence, and ultimately is con Mishna Berura 40,(5) and Mishna Berura elohim does not refer to Hashem (such as vinced that Berlin is Yerushalayim! 43,(25)). A bus pass holder inside a shirt ein elohim zulasecha, and elohim atta in (Meshech Chachma, Vayikra 26,44) And pocket satisfies that halachic requirement Tuesday's .Shir shel yom). so it was. "Even in old and very beloved (Mishna Berura 43,(24))). Unlike the The kavanosof~andi:i.i~rnn~ families, the thought was expressed that Siddur Kavanas Hashem, your card will be rnand ;m>:>;m>do not apply to all berachos. when in the days of Moshiach all the Jews at hand at all times, whenever you want to It is vital that you see for yourself how the would go to Eretz Yisroel: 'We don't see make a beracha. Mechaber (124,6) and the Mishna Berura any good reason for doing that. - Hier 1'tl (124,(25)) explain this. Note also that,,,, in Hambwg ist es doch auch ganz schoen Source.of all berachos ...... rn:m,,.,,,,, (It's also very nice right here in "'"''""'"""~"'is a generic phrase.As the i't~l-11-~ MishnaBerura (ibid.) explains, thespecifit Hamburg)!))' 12 (He is) the Eternal Master of all ...... We, of course, would never be guilty of request should be substituted for """""" ...... - i'l'li'T'li1'1n f'I~ ?:JT'l 111N: m"'Oi. For an explanation of jr'Ol.:li'm',-see such thinking. But is that enough? If we unthinkingly mumble "Te'ka beshofar," 'C'i17~H Chayei Adam 6,l and Mishna Berura Almighty ...... 't'j?l"1 "Velirusha/ayim;' "Vesechezenna," "U'venei 124,(24). All-capable ...... ,,.,,,,,,,'>lr.l Yerushalayim;' or any other similar request The Gemorain Shabbos l19b states that Source of all capabilities ...... t:f7.Jrnn:lTl'>lr.ll Amein means )l:l> The Jewish Observer, February 2004 15 tion) without experienLing an intense yearn is anything more basic than simply saying dependence upon the Ribbono she[ Olam ing for an end to the Caius, are we much "Sim shalon1," "Shalon1 ra1l' and "Oseh (Mishna Berura 5,(1)). better? Everyone can de1nonstrate to shalom bimromav" - all pleading for • There are so many hungry people in Hashem his genuine desire to be reunited peace - with kavana and conviction? the world who have no idea when they will with all of Kial Yismel in Yerushalayim ha'be • Have you shopped for food and drink, eat next, or where that pitifully inadequate nuya by resolving never to say these tefil and paid for them with money you have sustenance will come from. For then1, a full los without feeling keen longing for the worked hard to earn? Yet, as you open the sto1nach is an unknown sensation, and Geula. refrigerator and pour yourself a glass of juice, pangs of starvation are their constant co111- • The situation in Eretz Yisroel needs no does it occur to you that it docs not belong panions. A 1nomenfs reflection before elaboration. Of all the things that one ought to you? Only the recitation of a beracha will beginning Birk.as Han1azon or a beracha to be doing to try to invoke Heavenly mercy, make it truly yours (Berachos 35a). Each acharona can infuse one with appreciation time we say a birchas hanehenin (a bless for one's blessings of abundance. ing before a pleasing experience) offers • Before saying the Yehi ratzon prior to another opportunity to ponder our taking medication or undergoing a nled- SMILOWFAMILY Returns to South Florida MOTHERS AND FATHERS AUGNm SAVING KIDS mforhrm~f~Mtn~~ { CONFIDENTIAL HOTLINE I Parent Support Gl'OllJlS I Yeshiva Liaison { E-Mail Support Group I Sibling Support Gl'OllJlS I STAl!R -Female Sibling Program { Private Consultadon Ft. Lauderdale - Coral Springs Hotel I Refmals to Probionals a Golf Club and Convention Center Orgmdons • GlattKosher,OiohvY!Srod,Noo-Gebrokt • Locatedjust40min. fiomMiami Beach I Educational Forums on Awareness • Beautiful Yorn Tov atmosphere • Free shuttle to beach • Newly built & opened in 2000 Sportsplex (Ia sltating & 16 ttmW ccmts) and Prmntion • Entire hotel facility Kosher L'Pesach • A world ofnearby water, • 10,000 sq, ft. tropical atrium lobby land & air recreation I PM IParent Mentoring) Group • 30,000 sq. ft. banquet facilities • Organized trip~ on Chol Hamoed • Suites & private seder rooms to local attractions For IIiOre ihlbr.mariM plrue b\ll I lending Library • PGA 18-hole, par 72 golf course • Nightly entertainment from world- (305) 534.:-2941 or {800) 379~24()1) • Heated swimming pool famous Jewish entertainers Fa: (305) 718-0669 including Shloime Dachs • Fully equipped fitness center, Email: I>c;ath2004!ihol.coJn sauna & wfurl.pool spa • Rabbi Yaakov Feitman {Woodmere, NY) U.S.A. • Aerobics, aqua tread & kickbox classes Sdwlar-in-Residenc.e Malkie Raskas • Certified Fitness Trainer • Inspiring shiurim & lectures 11 s~sa:o400 • Professional day camp & baby sitting • Five Star dining including special dietary requests • Under the strictest ~.~!!! Rabbinic supervision ~l~Hllrl 16 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 ical procedure (Mechaber 230,4 and dent in his zechuyos (n1erits). Rather, one needs to become thoroughly knowl Mis/ma Berum 230,(6)), it behooves a per should place one's faith in Hashem's edgeable in the halachos, son to recall that all rcfua originates \Vith chessed (Mechaber98,4), There are, to be sure, practical difficul the Ro{ei kol clwlim (The Healer of all sick I)ue to space restrictions, this article ties that have to be considered and dealt people), and that his recitation of this tefilla could only present a very few halachos and with.1b ll111nediatcly incorporate into one's is yet another affirmation that he looks to examples, Rabbi Chaim Kanievsky asserts davcning everything covered in this arti Hashe1n to take care of all his needs. that one is required to be an expert in cle is dearly not feasible, Proper tefil/a takes • f.Jow many times a day do we say, Hilchos Tcfilln, and that learning these hala longer than we are used to, and people have "Bamch Hashem"? And how many of chostakes precedence over all other learn to go to work, or have to watch their chil those times do we actually think about ing! (Orchos fosherchapter 30) dren so that others can leave for work, Each what we're saying? 'fry this: the next time person's situation is unique. l)iscuss it with son1cone asks you how you're doing, IIL CREATING A"CHEVRA" OF your Rav, and let him guide you on how instead of answering, robot-like," J3aruch DEDICATED DAVENERS to proceed, Hashe1n," think to yourself, "I-Jashen1 is But do proceed! You will benefit from the source of all bemchos, and He has t is 111uch easier, and far n1orc inspir your improved tefil/a, And Kial Yisrocl will, blessed me with good health," And then ing, to daven properly when those too, lllll reply, "Baruch Hashcn1, fine!" around you arc also doing so, Speak with I 13 • If at son1c point during davening, you others in your n1inyan to see if they share Rabbi 1-fillcl /_.aks, Rosh Yeshiv;i Knesses f-lagcdola and a grandson of the Cho_(etz Chai111, told 1ne that suddenly realize that you lost kavana, do your co1nmitn1cnt to improved 'n1cn tefilla. the Cho_{etz Chaim encouraged people in this n1an not despair, Dispel the distracting approach your Rav as a (representative of ner, attributing it to Rabbi Yisrod Salanter. The Chofctz thoughts, gather your concentration, and a) group, There's strength in numbers, Chaim would give a nmshaf (parable) of his own to 1 continue with refreshed kavana. -' The bottom line: tcfi/la is not a passive en1phasize the point: A young girl sold apples in the 1narket, and son1e hooligans ca1ne and upset the cart, Should your efforts to improve your dav process. A person has to work at it. He sending the apples flying in all directions. While peo cning lead to success in achieving better needs to learn the n1eaning of what he is ple scram hied to pick then1 up and make off with kavana, be careful not to fall into the trap saying; he needs to concentrate on what them, the girl stood there crying. Someone came up of expecting Hashetn to answer your he is saying; he needs to pay attention to to her and upbraided her, advising her to salvage tefilla in retum On the contrary, this expos how he is saying it; he needs to focus on what apples she could, rather than cry and allow every last one to be lost. The Chofrtz Chai1n concluded, es a person to the danger of having his deeds his daveningto the exclusion of all other "The same with kai•ana. Rather than kt the rest of scrutinized, since he appears to be confi- thoughts, actions and distractions; and he the tefilla go to waste, salvage what you can!" Mommy, \ook, I can do this! ~ Netcare's team of Evaluators and Therapists can help ~ your children reach their full potential and help you, the parent, further promote their development. All services are free of charge, conducted in your choice of setting - and in your language, l~"~lii.·,,Nqs~~~- __ >--' ~1[}: wrwrr: earing ltllrtl .• . 1'.:>~'P!> 7l> ~l>l7 'flln Early Intervention Program NETCARE Early Intervention Program is funded and regulated by the New York State Department ofHealth, in New York City by the New York City Department ofHealth and Mental Hygiene, and in Westchester and Nassau by the County Department of Health. A participating agency of COMPREHENSM •QUALITY [I] NETWO~INC- •INTEGRITY ® When'caringcotmls~ •STABILITY Est. 1985 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 17 10 DAYS/9 NIGHTS APRIL S-14, 2004 (Per person bdsed on double Occupancy· Children. as 3rd or.4th person in room) Adults: $1750 Child 3•11: $.875 Infant 0-2: $400 FOR INFO& RESERVATIONS CAll: 1.866.ARACHIM (1.866.272.2446 This. year, treat yourself and. your family. to a truly unforgettable Pesach holiday with Arachim, at the beautiful Hilton Costa Mesa in sunny Southern California! Here, you will not only enjoy the beautiful scenery and fun-filled local sights and attractions, you will be spiritually uplifted and inspired by our wonderful program for increased knowledge and chizuk! ONLY ARACHIM brings you World Class International lecture Staff with Separate Lecture Programs for Hebrew and English speakers ! As always, Childcare will be providecJ during lectures. Make your own Famih,J Seder, or participate in an inspiring Communal Seder. ASHKENAZI & SEPHARDI MINYANIM SPECIALIZED YOUTH PROGRAMS SINGLES PROGRAM 8EIS MIDRASH AND MUCH MORE ••• UNDER THE STRICTEST RABBINICAl SUPERVISION By Rabbi Aharon Simkin, Senior Coordinator' for Kehilla Kosher and lgud Hakashrus of Los Angeles. Cholov Yisroel • Glatt Kosher • Bishul Yisroel Chassidishe Shechita • Shmura Matza Non-gebrokst available Confronting the of the Internet -Revisited The November issue of The Jewish harrnful repercussions of the Internet. information they offer. We arc grouping Observer, dealing with "Confronting Some representative letters follow in the the letters and articles according to topic. the I)angers of the Internet;' generated pages ahead. I. Reactions and Responses an unusual flow of letters - critical and In addition to the letters, a number II. From the Mouths and Pens of Our complimentary, confirn1ing the n1essage, of articles were submitted expanding on Children yet challenging our treatment of the prob what had already appeared in the len1, some praising the n1edium for its November issue. Several have been III. Over Our Shoulder ... And Two public discussion of the issue, others selected for publication because of the Steps Ahead I Looking Back, Anticipa denouncing it for its detailing of the different perspectives or additional ting The Future I. Reactions and Responses schools throughout North America when it comes to allo,ving the Internet undersigned an "Open Letter to all Bais in our ho1nes. Yaakov Parents;' which outlined, among A well-known Chassidic Rav and other concerns, the dangers of the Dayan, speaking from the pulpit, stat Internet in the home. The letter carefully ed how he was 1nesaderfour gittin (offi described the harm the Internet ciated over four divorces) over a short inevitably causes to hashkafa, tzcnius, span of time due to the infidelity of one arayos, and how it endangers, \.Yith the of the partners, either husband or wife; sin1plc click of the 1nouse, our entire this situation was brought about direct REACTION TO JO ON THE Torah lifestyle. ly by contacts established over the INTERNET: AN ENIGMA 'fo our utter surprise, son1e educators Internet. Why didn't the entire com refused to participate in this letter, munity 'shry chai ve kayo1n' and in1n1e To the Editor: even though it was endorsed by the Board diately remove the Internet from their I cannot begin to tell you how 1nuch of Roshei Yeshivas of Torah Umesorah homes? An enigma. you have accomplished with your and was published in Tlze fewish At a recent Torah U1nesorah November issue of ]~he ]e1vish Observer Observer and 171e Yated. 1~hcse educators Convention, the Telshe Rosh Yeshiva of containing several articles on the felt that the letter was too strong. Chicago, Rabbi Avrohom Chaim Levine Internet. I must admit, however, that I The first enigma to be faced is that N'"V''n>, quoted the Novominsker Rebbe still have an enigma ("Perplexing, baf vvc teach emunas chachatniln, the prin N"P~7-o, Rosh Agudas Yisroel, as saying) fling or seen1ingly inexplicable n1attcr) ciple of listening to the gedolei doreinu, "We should put an issur yichud (forbid etc" - Webster's Dictionary). and yet, find hair-splitting and tortured isolation with a person or object) on the Recently, 82 principals of girls' reasons not to listen to our chachatniln Internet in our businesses." Despite this The Jewish Observer, February 2004 19 clear instruction, n1any of us provide hadracha and n'lussar (guidance and since few will listen to blanket "no's." As Internet access in our homes for our chil reproof) on the basics of our beliefs! educators, we believe that change is best dren to use right under our very own The Philadelphia Rosh Yeshiva, Rabbi effected through a positive approach noses. Is this not an enigma? Shmuel Kaminetsky i-n:,,'n>, told me he using warn1th, chizuk and reinforce1nent, A U.S. senator recently demonstrat has first-hand knowledge of a family not radical and harsh 1neasures, \Vhich ed how after typing in a certain single destroyed by the insidious effects of the lnay alienate. Yet, in the face of such peril, word, 110,000 we!:> sites dealing with Internet. Yet, I was asked by a great ta/mid how can one respond in a pleasant man pornography and depravity will pop up chacham, "How can we asser (prohibit) ner? One does not wish to react in a way onto the screen. It has also been shown the Internet in the home when so that is so shocking and vehement that that a single typographical error made n1any talmidei chachan1im have it in their it appears to verge on hysteria. We know on some web addresses can unwitting own hornes?" Is anyone able to explain people will not easily be receptive in this ly open a pornographic minefield. Is this this enigma? negative atmosphere; yet how can one not an enig1na? A U.S. senator must give Everyone knows that to asser every hold oneself back in our fearful situa Bnei Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov thing is a simplistic and futile response, tion? An enigma. A girls' school recently reported an incident in which a few high school fresh men chatting with each other on Instant Messenger were joined on-line by so1ne It hurts of their brothers. This led to a date for one of the girls, and a completely new 1oc lifestyle change for her. When all the sets of parents were called in to discuss the seriousness of the problem, a few still insisted on keeping the Internet in their hon1es with excuses to justify their actions that didn't hold water. Some of the schools that joined the • group of principals in signing the "Open Letter" are still not able to stop their secular teachers from assigning homework requiring Internet use, despite the clear, implicit dangers It hurts involved. An elementary school attached to a yeshiva posts all of the homework, from all of the teachers ( kodesh and cho[) everyday on the Internet. Recently, a mother discovered her eight-year-old child and a neighbor's child on a web site, observing what the Torah calls "an abomination." The mother was shocked beyond words, and was at a loss at how It feels better just to talk about it. That's to explain to the children what they were why we're here. Our staff is made up of caring and sensitive individuals. Together, seeing. However, she did not remove the we can help you explore your options. We Internet from her home. can refer you to recognized professionals It seems that the Internet has taken for counseling, legal advice or help in finding a safe environment. We can also such a strong hold in our community and put you in touch with some very special is so difficult to eradicate that it can Rabbis. But in order for us to reach out to almost be compared to a form of sub you, you must first reach out to us. stance abuse. In order to prevent further Confidential Hotline 1.888.883.2323 addiction, we must listen to our Gedolim (Toll Free) without question. The enigmas detailed 718.337.3700 here will never be explained, and the Do it for yourself. (NYC Area) problem will not be conquered through education or seichel (intelligence). We Do it for your children. Shalom Task Force'' a 501(cJ(3) charitable organizat1ori know that the yeitzer hara can't be edu- ---· ··-·------·------.. ------·-··------20 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 cated. "Ein apotropos le' arayos;' and, there torial board experienced in this publi From the words of this issue, it appears fore, the only option is for it to be cation, for it reflects a somber recogni that having Internet for the family is a destroyed. tion of a widespread cancer of growing norm. However, I am assured For us to hope to emerge from this destruction within the crown jewel of this is not normal. Many resist this temp quag1nire, we must accept as a chak American Jewry. In a community where tation. We are thriving, and so are our (decree) set hy the Einei Ha'eida- "Thou so many of us are children of survivors children. shalt not have the Internet in thy home. of the physical Holocaust of the 1940s I share my following thoughts as an There is neither wisdom, nor under and who survived the spiritual additional source of strength: standing, nor counsel against Hashem." Holocaust of the twentieth century, we Look around and take note of the per With the acceptance of this chok, we can sadly witness such a destruction, such a centage of people who are of marriage then move forward knowing that the denigration. able age and who succeed in marrying. seemingly insurmountable obstacles in The stories that are told by the Baruch Hashem, they are well within the our path can be breached, that the bat Rosehi Yeshiva and Rabbanim are hor majority. Obviously, the merits that one tle is not lost, and that we can conquer rific. The rate of devastation is horrif needs to become married are easily with the view that the Internet is so essential ic. It is a loss of sanity, responsibility, in our reach. There are some exceptions and pervasive, it cannot be eliminated. self-respect. Such despair. for reasons that we are not privileged to Once a foolproof method to eliminate This was a bold and painful step for know. May Hashem bless us to make it the undesirable material is found, it is many. l take your hand in sympathy and unanimous. hoped that the Gedolim will then sorrow. Next, look around and take note of remove the issur. Please allow me to provide some con the percentage of people who are mar Not everything one thinks should one structive insight - perhaps for another ried and who succeed in having children. say; not everything one says should one issue, if needed. Baruch Hashem, they are well within the write; not everything one writes should Given the context, I did not think that majority. Obviously, the merits that one one publish (attributed to Rav Yisroel it was appropriate for one of the authors needs to become parents are also with Salanter). This wisdom certainly applies to plug a web site in his article, and espe in reach of most people. There are some to our subject. We can, however, think, cially by name. There are other venues exceptions for reasons that we are not say, write and publish a message con for doing this. There are other times for privileged to know. May Hashem bless sistent with the adage: "Listen to our doing this. us to make it unanimous Gedolim." After all, the Talmud advises I would like to have seen the contri Then, project yourself back in time us: "If youths tell you 'build; and elders bution of someone with credentials of a hundred generations. I believe that you tell you 'demolish; listen to the elders and a computer professional, for this person will find these percentages to be the same do not listen to the youths, for the build would have addressed the need for pass for them as they are for us. ing of youths is destruction and the word and computer security. Also, none And now do something painful. Make destruction of elders is building:' of the authors suggested any tools for the somber mapping between the fami RABBI S. AISENSTARK coping with e-mail smut. lies in that generation in our distant past Principal of Beth Jacob D'Rav flirschprung Montreal •Grand Ctinyon Come and connect to the wonders of Hashem's • Vo_m_ .Park creations in some of the most WWW.ENSNARED.COM • Bryce Canyon 1 t spectacular locales in .--Zion National 1 To the Editor: Park ,,, Western America. Your latest issue that featured the •The Golden C amp' ,_ Internet use must have been one of the G.ate Bridge Ma~ Rabu -...... DATEs, most difficult for you to publish. Four • s-wortd r ./ June 27-July 16 For 8th and 9th grade boys. out of five featured articles contained sug •·Motor boating • Scenic hiking gestions for reducing risk and for shield Under the direction of Rabbi Raphael Mendlowitz. ing against damage, which is good for Associated with The Yeshivrl a,{ Greater Washington. those who need this advice. However, I was deeply saddened by the fact that .... CJlll Now,SPACE Is LIMITED! almost every author wrote how impor tant these measures are for us. That is, it is "we" who need the information, and not "they" who need it. I can't imagine the pain and anguish that our dear leadership and your edi- The Jewish Observer, February 2004 27 to their descendants who live with us family, then I provide you with the fol I am enclosing a copy of the cover today. Come up with a statistic for those lowing opportunity for great merit. Don't sheet which states that it is reprinted with who have descendents in our generation, talk about it in public, and tell your kids per1nission. and for those who didn't make it. to keep this quiet, too. In doing so, you Kol ha kavod. I believe that you will conclude that will make it easier for others in our com RABBI MOSHE ZWICK the merits that one needs for his/her fam munity to keep the Internet out of their Executive Director ily to survive and endure through many homes. MRS. SHULAMIS GOLDBERG generations of)ewish history are very elu Do not give up on yourselves. If not Associate Principal sive. "fhey are not easily within our reach. today, you will find the strength for repair, MRS. BATYA NEKRITZ And there are some exceptions for rea il""N soon. Associate Principal sons that we are not privilege to know. RABBI TZVI BLACK Shulamith High School, Brooklyn, NY If I had evidence to prove that hav Lakewood, NJ ing the Internet in the family will defi BREAKTHROUGH IN INFORMATION, nitely hurt its chance of survival, then REPRINTS FOR PARENT BREACH IN PROTECTIVE BARRIERS I would tell you. But I don't have any. If BODY OF SCHOOL I had evidence to prove that keeping the To the Editor: Internet out of the family will definite To the Editor: In the Cheshvan issue of The Jewish ly increase its chances, then I would tell Thank you so much for permitting Observer, a most important issue has you. But honestly, I don't have this either. us to reprint The Jewish Observer arti been addressed, that of the gidrei tzenius I just know that if this trend repeats itself, cles on the misuse of computers and the u'kedusha (safeguards of modesty and that many family lines that exist today Internet. sanctity) being breached. will not survive Jewish history over the We have warned our parents about Although I find all of the informa long term. And I recognize the stress that the dangers of the Internet and we feel tion discussed to be correct, both in its families are experiencing by blocking out that these excellent articles are very content and in its need to be addressed, the Internet. And I know that sacrifices important for them to read. Hopefully I do have one major objection to this col are meritorious. And I now that Hashem they will encourage all parents to lection of articles. The fact that it is counts every merit. increase their vigilance when allowing described in such detail, which is, of And if you have the Internet in your their children to use computers. course, in order to issue a major wake- '..Rabbi', ··Hebrew Ian~ This §il)clio I visi.lli Shall>tn \>old···• 'lf• esseno" .of \:he• A The CQ RQJ'1s .c<> c.oul"ltrg•as )"l>ll aS: to · b" • the •Mo~\:· , pri>Sel"ll:.(>l:ion bf>\:i;>eJI. _i_~----:~ :~~-Y_-: which,,-:e1<;;se: -9,rammtn~- '¢ ~· .si'la1•~rn G61d's''si --;~_~_dipus p:t()c_e_ss _\~_imp Yi~ L~~~n''i~~br"~ •··. ::in --t:_he,:_:_sc_e;rri 22 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 up call to those who feel it is not harm it is inadequate in Jewish tern1s. EDITORIAL RESPONSE: ful, is great cause for distress. A paper or magazine lends credence In many Torah homes, The Jewish to its contents, and anything printed in 111e rabbinical leadership of Agudath Israel Observer is read by young and old alike. it will be associated with the general atti has gone on the record, pointing out major I can only see the reading of these arti tude and message of the publication. moral hazards that exist on the Internet, cles by our youth - especially our teen After all, you have never advertised treif urging people to exercise caution, adopt agers- as a cause for those who arc being foods or niixed dances or any other serv safeguards and impose limitations on its protected to have their curiosity aroused ices that are obviously foreign to Jewish usage, as the articles in the November JO by such detail. This seems to outweigh values or practices. had conveyed. They did not, however, issue the benefits of such articles. One is left with the very uncomfort a blanket prohibition against use of e-mail I feel that issues of The Jewish able feeling that you either do not quite or the Internet. While neither The Jewish Observer, such as this one, should pos believe the n1essages in your articles, or Observer nor any other Agudath Israel sibly carry a warning label, such as "To that you lack the confidence to practice department maintains a website, we do rec be read by mature adults ONLY." what you preach. ogni7.e that many people are dependent on Aside from this, I feel that the JO does Whether an individual business the Internet for their business, professional, a wonderful job at documenting the decides to have/use an Internet facility and even personal needs, such as pur issues of the day, in a format to which is between them and their daas Torah, chasing and research. It is for those who b'nei Torah can turn. but their web sites should be excluded do use the Internet that websites are includ YECHEZKEL NUSSBAUM from advertisements. ed in paid advertisements. Our rabbini Spring Valley, NY MRS. D. LEITNER cal leadership has not prohibited JO Salfard, England from accepting such advertisements. N .W. EDITORIAL RESPONSE The articles that appeared in the Internet Section in the November Jewish Observer were all reviewed and approved by our rabbinical advisors. The Shulamith School, which wrote the Personal responsibitily throughout service - NOT JUST "PAPERWORK" previous letter, is one of a number of ORIGINATOR OF THE PRESENT RABBINICALLY APPROVED METHOD Highly recommended by Gedolai Hador- Here and in Eretz Yisrael yeshivas and day schools that either ordered copies of the November issue or 1043-42nd Street, Brooklyn, NY 11219 received permission to reproduce copies Day & N".ght phone: (718) 8.'il-8925 of the Internet section for distribution 1Vt)IJ:IN1~1:1Nj7 Vl"j7 - 1'1~ 1Nl mo~v 'll~ to their parent body. N.W. Kavod Haniftar with Mesiras Nefesh and compassion for the bereaved family. TAHARAS ffANIFTAR SHOULD NEVER BE COMMERCIALIZED CONFLICT BETWEEN EDITORIAL MESSAGE AND ADVERTISEMENTS' VALUES You can! Just: call wish I could The Yitti Leibel To the Editor: ''r Helpline. Your carefully selected detailed arti HOURS: cles on the dangers of the Internet left Monday-Friday ...... Sam -12pm speak to a Monday-Thursday...... 8pm -1 lpm me more than a little confused. You see Sunday ...... 9am - l 2pm, 9pm - I I pm the same issue of The Jewish Observer, which spelled out the destructive pow frum therapist • 718-HELP-NOW ers of the Internet, also containing no ' ------The Jewish Observer, February 2004 23 CONFRONTING THE DANGERS OF THE INTERNET- REVISITED II. Out of the Mouths of Our Children The Hazards of the Internet - as experienced by our teenagers. Rabbi Shmuel Gluck HOW DIFFERENT JS YOUR CHILD! and girls are actually thinking. should be mutually exclusive in the world I therefore sent an e-mail request to oflogic is comfortably intertwined in the iscussi_ng th~, Jnter,?et with the about 45 of my teenage friends. My e practical world of human weakness. Man intention to scare parents is a mail request said: was created with the ability and a desire D daunting and often impossible I have been asked to speak in a school, to achieve greatness. Man was also cre task. Although the objective mind can to parents, on the subject ofthe Internet ated with the ability to sink to the depth easily find many valid points that and why it is not a good thing to have of immorality. emphasize the risks of the Internet, the in the home. I am looking for some I would like to submit that both these points themselves are not a guaranteed insight on this from the teenage mind. urges can be found within each and every deterrent. For a combination of reasons, I am also looking for horror stories, but one of us. Allow me to explain. parents are likely to dismiss my con only those that involve kids whose par The majority of us perform well when clusions by responding that "My kid ents are unaware ofwhat is happening. placed in a positive atmosphere. The aver wouldn't do that, my child is different:' The reason that I added the last line age teenager will therefore do well in If reasoning is not effective, how can I was to highlight the point that parents school, behave in shul., and integrate well convey my experiences in a manner that think they know their kids, and on a basic within his or her family. The common would override the parents' preconceived level they do. Children, though, like threads in these few examples are that opinions of their own child! adults, are more complex than they these environments support good I realize that what is really needed is appear. This point brings us to our first behavior. Most people do not behave to bring to the public what our children misconception. against the system. Peer pressure is one themselves are saying. Parents have reason, laziness is another, being inher some very sensible views, but their views TO HONOR, TO VIOLATE- OR BOTH! ently good is yet another. are based on assumptions. These views This does not exclude that the same represent how they believe their children arents would like to believe that person, when in an environment that act and react to different situations. My children live their lives in a moral supports negative behavior, will not enter goal is to convey what our teenage boys Ply consistent manner. Let us accept a chat room. It does not exclude the Rabbi Gluck is director of Areivim, an organi that our sons do learn two hours teenage boy, when alone, from staring zation that offers our youth advice and assistance, straight on a Shabbos afternoon without at something that popped up on his with a wide array of support systems. For edu prompting. That does not exclude the screen by mistake. cational material or for assistance: 845-371-2760 possibility that they desire to look at I am not criticizing anyone's child or [email protected]. His article, "Shalom Bayis: A View From Your Child's Eyes," was fea things that they are not supposed to be when I state my belief that they will, when tured in JO Jan. '02. looking at, such as pornography. What it is accessible, take advantage. I am stat- 24 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 ing that they are normal, and react nor mally by demonstrating the typical lack • of self control which almost all of us may he productive kid learns the system have. Here is the first of the several quotes Twell enough to never be caught. It is that I have based my conclusions on. A young boy writes: often a single mistake, often years later, I am a frum yeshiva bachur attend ing a very strict and a very famous yeshi which makes their parents recognize that va. About one-and-a-half years ago, I was eager to look at pornography, but they have been misled during the past I never had the guts to do that aveira. few years. One day, a kid in my class took me to his house to delete the temporary inter net files because he didn't want to get in trouble. As I was erasing them, I was street, to make it a hazard too great to • through unsolicited pop-ups. also looking at them and then we went ignore. Yet we still cross the street. Logic How upset would they be if they were onto websites. And I REGRET SO should then say that we should still allow certain that their child entered a chat MUCH, because it has changed my life our children to have access to the room often and once a week made small forever. Internet. talk with a boy/girl? Adding to this con 'fhere is a 1nisconccption that girls I have put in a lot of thought into this cern, what would their thoughts be if it have more self control than boys and that point. It is a logical one and is based on was the same person each time? I am told less control is needed for them. A Bais the fair assumption that everything in from teenagers that this, too, is a certainty Yakov girl e-mailed me the following life offers risks, yet we all recognize that for those that enter chat rooms. experience: we must continue to live our Jives. My How would they feel if one night every I know a friend who went to Bais response is to ask the reader to consid week or two their child was up until 4:00 Yaakov of . She was smart, pop· er their definition of acceptable risk. in the morning instant messaging? ularand on the top ofher class. I men Acceptable risk is dependent on two Now let us consider the more extreme tion this to highlight that the Internet things that must be considered simul possibilities. I would suggest that a problem is not limited to the under· taneously. We must weigh our anticipated number greater than one out of a thou achiever or the less popular girls. This gain against the risk involved in attain sand is dramatically affected by the girl was just a healthy curious girl who, ing this goal. Because of the nature of Internet. I use this number because it ini behind her parents' back, met, and the Internet, we must add one more fac tially does not cause a stir in the hearts became heavily involved with a boy right tor. In addition to the risk, we must be of parents. My experiences speak of a after their first initial meeting. She was concerned with the general, more sub really broken after that. I don't know if tle exposure that all teenage Internet users she went for help or what, but she began are subject to. smoking pot and suddenly went from The positive of the Internet is the Digest of Meforshim a nornial above-average girl to a prob access to necessary information, such as lem one. Today she is married baruch for school reports, and the ability to keep 'V1i77 inJ 'V1i77 Hashem to a good guy, but there our children busy with acceptable activ ';>"::ll 1l11''m 7Nlr.11?! l"n1i10 remains this real messed up look in her ities such as sports, online purchasing, Available at eyes where she looks like she still has emailing and instant messaging with their LEK UTE I emotional issues friends. c/o Yitzchok Rosenberg The negatives are harder to discuss, 1445 54th Street DEFINING "ACCEPTABLE RISK" as every family has their personal point Brooklyn, NY 11219-4228 system. I personally would not want my 718-854-6701 efore I continue with other exam child to download music from the 20 Volumes on Torah, Perek, Medrash, ples, I feel the need to bring up a Internet, others might not be con Bcommon response. It is true that cerned with secular music. Parents Megilos, Talmud, and Tehilim. the previous example represents an must rate themselves, on a scale of one Proceeds of sales distributed atnong extreme and small percentage of our to ten, if the following took place: Yeshivos and used for reprinting of volun1es out-of-print teenagers' experiences, not the majori How upset they would be if their child ty of them. It could be said that enough saw flashes of hard pornography two PRICE: $8.00 PER VOLUME people get hit by cars while crossing the times a week. This happens constantly ------··-·------·----·----·--··------··--·-·--·--·------The Jewish Observer, February 2004 25 more serious danger. Let us substitute this Docs it n1ake sense that a single decision n1akes their parents recognize that they issue with a deadly sickness, G-d forbid. should decide your approach to par have been misled during the past few Who would consider it an acceptable risk enting, without your ability to make a years. to expose their children to a one-in-a knowledgeable and informed reassess I am dealing with several cases of chas thousand chance of any terrible sickness ment? sanini whose wives have found their hus simply to give them an opportunity to One boy wrote: By the way, there are bands visiting pornographic sites. Can become more educated, or to be updat other ways to track Internet usage you imagine what this does to a marriage? ed with their favorite sports team? besides Temp files, but as the comput Can you imagine how ingrained it Let us now consider that we might er expert in my house, I know how to must be within the boy to continue look have two or three children with access get around them all, so it's not much of ing at such sites, even after marriage? to the Internet. Please tell me, how impor a 'worry' for nie tant are these advantages when compared Another common misconception is THE CHAT ROOM SCENE to the certainty of the Internet's subtle that parents are confident that if they effect, in addition to the more extreme made the wrong decisions, there will be ermit me a comment about chat risks of the Internet? Would anyone con flashing lights warning them of any prob rooms. I have a letter from a fine sider a one-in-a-250 chance acceptable lems. Parents believe that if their child Pgirl who, I believe, never met a boy. risk when it centers around such seri is speaking to a girl then they will sud She nonetheless utilized the chat rooms. ous issues? denly stop doing well in class or maybe She writes: something more extreme like put on an I've been so fed up lately about the THE UNACCOUNTABILITY FACTOR earring. whole AOL online chatting issue. I could Sadly, this is not always true. In these say about 90% ofanyfrum communi here is another aspect of accept past few years, I have spoken to many ty has access to the Internet, and prob able risk that must be considered. parents who believe their child would not ably about 75% ofthe teens and kids that TAcceptable risk must allow the know what to say to a girl, while the child have access to the net are chatting with person to monitor and assess the risk on has admitted to me of aveiros chamuros guys and girls, mostly behind their par a constant basis. Because of the priva (severe transgressions) that he or she has ents' backs. The reason I think it's sud cy your children have in regard to what done. Teenagers consider it a challenge denly bothering me so much is because sites they see, because of their ability to to be able to fool their parents. I used to be involved with these kinda wipe off these addresses as soon as they As a matter of fact, the more put things, and now that I'm back from sem finish viewing them, it is impossible to together the child is, the better he or she inary, it disgusts me. For me, chatting accurately assess the risk. is at keeping secrets. It is the immature was a sort of an escape. I was a Bais Please consider this. Unlike your and unsuccessful child who gets caught. Yaakov girl - never would get involved child's bringing home a new friend, you The productive kid learns the system well with guys in the "real" world, but in a never really have an opportunity to check enough to never be caught. It is often a chatroom, I could be whoever I want up on the advantages versus the risks. single mistake, often years later, which ed and have the fun of talking to guys. So I was involved with things for a while, and it was so easy for me to get Our comprehensive wrapped up in these "relationships" that evaluations and really didn't exist. I would never let a Jum~start therapies are guy call me - or give out any real pri performed free vate info about myself - but I would EARLY INTERVENTION of charge, in the A Division of Women's League Community Residences. Inc privacy and think about the guy for a lot and won der if maybe I should. Ser~ ~ed iHfo't.tr & toddlers, convenience of in, the, Brooklyn-/ NYC area-. It was so bad, and I realized how SERVICES PROVIDED: wrong it was, and now that I'm back "' OT, PT and Speech Therapy 0 Respite from seminary it kills me even more. I '6 Special !ristruction fl Unparaheted servtce hear about little 12- and I 3-year-olds o- Nutrition, V!Sion Therapy, ~ v.ith Assistive Technology ~nat attenU~ by getting involved online without their -tr Psycho!ogCal ~I Social experienced case Won< Services I Parent TrairTg coordinators) parents' knowing. When I was doing i4 the youngest kids involved were like 14, Sheindel (Jeanne) Warman Pinchus Lerner Ph.D.__ ;:,:: EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR CLINICAL SUPERVISOR 15, and now the ages are getting younger and younger, and it's upsetting lNs t<>Jfy itl!eN 26 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 they know! And even ifthe parents know dren are often more shocked with our I would like to close with the fol about the problem and are conscious permissiveness than we can imagine. lowing plea: For those parents who feel about it, if they go out one night to a Please read this last quote from one the Internet is either harmless or sim chassuna, the kid goes online. of my e-mail friends! ply unworthy of the large amount of It makes me sick that parents are so attention devoted to it by our Gedo/im, Another girl wrote me: clueless. It pierces itself into the please reconsider your stance. Do it for I know at least fifty kids that for a neshama and stays there always. Your your children. They themselves are ask period in their lives have gone online kids won't respect you if you let them. ing you to. B after their parents are sleeping and They don't know that you are unaware STAM DID NOTHING from mid of the dangers of the net. They think Jerusalem's only licensed BUYER'S BROKER Personalized weekly update service night to six AM, slug around school, that you know and you don't care. No incl All agents' listings & owners' ads don't pay attention, are not happy kid will respect their parents if they • 2nd home in Israel "'RTZEIH VACUUM AT THE TOP? would like to make one final point. Parents have a misconception that I their children believe that there is nothing wrong with the Internet and that they do not want their parents to inter FOR fere. We therefore conclude that our child THE FINEST· will be angry with us if we restrict their IN privileges. It is true that they will be angry 1 at us. But at the same time, they will also 1111111 understand us. Even more, they want us AND VIDEO to be firm because within every child is the belief that their parents know bet USA/ ISRAEL ter. Within every child is a very clear moral guide. Believe it or not, our chi!- -----·----·--···--·------··--···--··----··---~·------1he Jewish Observer, February 2004 27 CONFRONTING THE DANGERS OF THE INTERNET - REVISITED II. Out of the Mouths of Our Children (Continued) selors and the com munity at large - tap into our yitzrei tov and remind ourselves who we really are, and who we are capa ble of becoming. "Makom shebaalei teshuva omdin, tzaddikim gemurim einam omdin - The place where baalei teshuva stand, the per fectly righteous do not stand" (Berachos 34b ). In other words, explains the NOTES FROM A RECOVERING VICTIM who had commanded a great deal of Rambam, the level of a baal teshuva is respect from chaveirim and admiration higher than that of one who never sinned. To the Editor: from younger bachurim, it was a great The aforementioned baal teshuva is In an important and sobering dis fall. Today, I wake up many mornings not the returnee to whom the term is cussion of the dangers lurking on the with feelings of utter worthlessness. "Who applied colloquially. Rather, the classic Internet, one section from the piece by am I to go to shul today? Who am I to baal teshuva is the subject of our dis Rabbi Aaron Twerski caught my eye ("A learn today? After behaving in such a way, cussion - one who grew up with Torah Ubiquitous Challenge, An Insidious what a hypocrite I am! I'm not worthy values, who strayed, and who has Trap," Nov. '03). He recounts two sto of Torah. I'm not capable of kedusha:' returned. In these dangerous times, it is ries. In one, the wife of a man who fell These are the most dangerous ever more critical that the tenet of teshu into the Internet trap "is convinced (with thoughts that can pass through a Jewish va be broadcast. considerable justification) that her person's head. Even after escaping the We live in the here and now. We must spouse's moral compass has been dam clutches of the Internet, the climb back struggle with society as it is. "Vigilance, aged for life." to frumkeit is daunting. It is virtually vigilance and more vigilance is our only In another instance, a woman who impossible not to become ensnared in recourse:' as Rabbi Twerski says. But for strayed anguishes, "I was the frummest feelings of hopelessness and loss - not those who weren't vigilant enough, we girl in my class and I will never get back merely of self-esteem, but of one's must at the same time remember that there again." entire sense of self. How he or she "Sheva yipol tzaddik vekam - The right While both sentiments may indeed be responds to these thoughts is the dif eous fall seven times and get up." As one true, they need not be. As more and more ference between having sinned and great Rosh Yeshiva put it, "The mark of people are - as your cover puts it, and becoming a lifetime sinner. a tzaddik is not that he, too, falls, but that as Gedolei Yisroel and professional fam The yeitzer hara's most powerful tool he always gets up." ily counselors have concurred - is to have us wallow in self-denigrating May Hakadosh Baruch Hu give us the "ensnared" by the Internet's dark side, pity, crumbling under the stares - real strength to keep standing. it is imperative to remind the readership or imagined - of our family, paralyzed NAME WITHHELD BY REQUEST of the power of the teshuva process. by unimaginable shame. I am a former yeshiva bachur and a It is vital that we as individuals - with A CONFESSION ... recovering Internet addict. For someone encouragement from rabbanim, coun- AND A PLEA FOR SANITY To the Editor: Sadly, the experience is almost com monplace, even in the dens and computer rooms of bnei Torah. I know this letter is not anything new to the now-awak ened community at large. I am simply crying out to the masses from my own personal pain. It is from the realization of the destruction that I find within myself that I request, for the benefit of the kla/., and as a zechus for my eventu al tikkun, that this letter be printed. Entering my adolescent years, I was a very good student, and a very pleas- 28 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 ant person. T was a1nong the crean1 of addict, all else falls with it. It leads to a \Vithout the luxury of a patch. J an1 an the crop. When I entered Mesivta in 9th tortured existence, to living two lives. To addict, my insides destroyed. Yiras grade, everyone expected the best of 1ne, this very day, people think of me as a very Shan1ayin1 is hut a distant 1nemory. J have and their hopes were fulfilled. In my first good bachur. My parents are proud of been living like this for years, not couple of years in Mesivta, I grc\v in ruch me, my Rebbe'im don't suspect that I months. Years. I feel directionless and see niyus tremendously, in an cxtre1ne way, could possibly be involved in the mud no \Vay out. by leaps and bounds. In learning, in yiras of society. One face towards the world To the casual observer, I am a good Slu1111ayin1, in niiddos. I had much to be and one face towards myself. Years of yeshiva bachur in a very prominent yeshi proud of. I was alive, I had direction, pondering: Am I a ycrei Sha111ayin1 or va. I keep sedorin1, daven with kavana, goals. My Rebbe'iln saw a success story not, a be11 TOrah or not - an adan1 kash even do an occasional chess ed. Inside I in me. It was through them that l had er or not? I still don't have the answer an1 controlled, torn, hurt and sen1i come this far, and they saw a future des to these questions. Maybe I'm just too depressed. l ask you to ask yourselves, tined to be filled with continued success. afraid to answer them. is that not sakanos nefashos? If that sakana Skin1ming over the articles in the was a sakana for me, it is probably a pages of November's Jewish Observer, one sakana for your son, husband, and sees a particular ter1n repeatedly: brother as well. If you wouldn't put food saka11as nefl-Ishos. Over and over, the dan on his plate without a hechsher, if you gers of the Internet arc described as such. y parents are proud of pay thousands upon thousands of dol But extre1ne tcnns in today's day and age Mme, my Rebbe'im don't lars in yeshiva tuition so that you are given very little respect. Something suspect that I could possibly should see Yiddishc nachas, you described as "unbelievable" could be eas be involved in the mud of shouldn't, you couldn't, knowingly allow ily fathomed. "Pilei pela'im" doesn't nee· society. One face towards the smallest possibility of such an out essarily indicate something particularly come. For his Olam Hazeh and Olam the world and one face extraordinary. J am \vriting to tell your Habba - I beg of you! - don•t let it be. audience at large that in this case, towards myself. A house filled with only kedusha produces sakanas nefashos n1eans just that, the risk products of kcdusha. A house where one of death of a nefcsh. finds publications or opportunities that l fell into the grips of the ycitzer hara. Life has no 1neaning. I have become don't fit with the ideals of the Torah will It ca1ne in an instant, it was not intend a person full of only selfishness and self. inevitably produce results in kind. ed. In issues of kedusha, I was particu indulgence. Such a life is worse than Years from today, people will look back larly careful. The temptation had come worthless. I've tried to get out of the rut on our generation and wonder - did peo before, but I suppressed it. Just curious, countless tin1es over the years. Picture ple who were careful with kashrus allow "just this once," my entire life turned someone who sn1okcs, without anyone this' The generation of the Second Beis upside down in an instant. I fell, and have knowing it. He can have a cigarette when Hamikdash was missing only one inte yet to really climb back out. ever he wants, where no one will sec. This gral factor. It was possible then, and it When one falls like that, becoming person is told to quit - without family, is still today. Hashem yeracheim. quickly into what in 1nany ways is an friends or a counselor, and definitely NAME WITHHELD BY REQUEST Not just a cheese, a tradition... Hao!am, the most trusted name in Cholov Yisroe! Kosher Cheese. A reputation earned through 25 years of scrupulous devotion to quality and kashruth. With 12 delicious varieties. Haolam, a tradition you'!! enjoy keeping. Al! f-lao!am cheese produc.ls arc made in the U.S.A. under the strict rabbinical supervision of: Cholov Yisroel The Rabbinate of K'hal A.dath Jeshurun, Washington Heights, l'iY THURM BROS. WORLD CHEESE CO. INC. BROOKLYN, NY 11232 Hao lam. The Jewish Observer, February 2004 29 CONFRONTING THE DANGERS OF THE INTERNET- REVISITED III. Over Our Shoulders & Looking Ahead: ~ gression of events in these exchanges often spirals downward leading our teiere kinder to inappropriate relation ships and high-risk situations. MORE TECHNOLOGY When access to instant messaging is STUMBLING BLOCKS AT HAND extended to the cell phone or other wire less device, these unhealthy interactions To the Editor: can become addicting diversions that Thank you for raismg awareness continue 24 hours a day, perhaps even and openly discussing the risks faced by within the hallowed walls of the beis our communities in this era of modern ham id rash. technology. Clearly, awareness is the first RABBI NORMAN LOVVENTHAL) step in addressing this insidious danger M.S. En., MSW to our sacred way of life. St. Louis, MO I have counseled numerous adoles cents and families struggling with the INTERNET USAGE: aftereffects of various Internet-related dif CAUTIONARY ADVICE ficulties. I have also been involved in pre work) swapping ("beaming") files at vention, presenting an interactive school. Many of these files would be con To the Editor: demonstration on this subject for mena sidered innocuous, but some would not. There has been much talk and dis halim at last spring's Torah Umesorah For example, one popular PDA game cussion regarding the Internet. Pages and National Convention, as well as for par involves the glorification of drug use. pages have been written concerning the ents at schools nationally. Additionally, PDAs and cell phones are potentially dangerous effects of the A common thought expressed by par now available in full color, and often have Internet. The articles that The Jewish ents and mechanchim is that they can't cameras built in. They can be used to cap Observer featured were nothing less than keep up with the technology. Children ture, view and trade in1ages of any kind. wonderful! and adolescents, however, are on the cut A pervasive yet under-emphasized I would like to comment about this ting edge in their understanding of hazard for our youth, related to the tech very important issue. We have faced n1any emerging technologies. As parents we nologies listed above, is instant messaging nisyonos (tests and trials) in the past. For have a responsibility to be conscious of (computer, cell phone and wireless ver exan1ple, the influence of television in our children's interests and to stay sions). While the dangers of chat rooms the Jewish home. There are many thou abreast of their activities. and com1nunicating with anonyn1ous sands of families that have not fallen prey Perhaps the greatest risks to our yeshi strangers have been addressed and are to this problem, whereas the Internet va bachurim and Bais Yaakov students well known, parents are less suspecting see1ns to have become quite acceptable are cell phones, laptops, PDAs and of children communicating \Vith their in many households. Why is this so? pager devices which have become "nec friends via instant messenger. Children Business. In order for most businesses essary" for many of our bnei Torah. The often believe that" the friend of my friend to function properly today, they must 1nost obvious threat of these items is sim is my friend:' They are frequently instant have Internet access. Many people have ilar to that of the computer. When these messaging with those whom they have businesses in their ho1nes. 1"herefore, the devices are wireless Web-enabled, they never seen, yet they do not consider Internet has made it into their homes. include all of the same perils of the home them to be strangers. Even though the Then the great nisayon arises. When is computer, with an added dose of privacy participants are frum and their real it really business-related and when is it and availability. Even when these devices names are known, the language and con unnecessary? are not Web-enabled, they can be prob tent of online conversations may quick Schools. Many schools (especially high lematic. It is not unco1nmon to see 5th_ ly cross the line of what is acceptable. schools and seminaries, especially those S'" grade students with PDAs (tbe ones This is due to the impersonal nature of that offer college credits) require infor that they "ne_ed" to record their home- the instant 1nessaging 1nediu1n. 1'he pro- n1ation from the Internet. Again, this 30 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 poses a proble1n when such infonnation May I offer a simple suggestion to help one truly deter111ined to look for trou is required. protect ourselves and our friends, par ble will find. It. Such people unfortunately Torah. This perhaps is the greatest ticularly parents of young children, always did and always will find ways to hcchsher (certification of legitimacy) for against this insidious threat to kedusha indulge in forbidden activities. When Internet usage. Never has any authen and tahara. True, its beneficial effect est ab I ishing barriers to the garbage out tic 10rah organization made usage of tel would be slow in con1ing) but it can only there, we should bear that in mind. evision. 'J'he tv never received a Torah be positive. l have a firewall which, for the ben endorsement, lvhcreas there arc n1a11y, Under the n1ezuza on our doors) affix efit of your readers, is a box through many Torah organizations that have a small but clearly printed sign, such as which all Internet activity must pass. I Web sites. It is very difficult to encour "Our Home is Clean of TV and the have a password-protected lock which age people to refrain fron1 Internet usage, Internet. Welcome!" or a similar sign simply turns off the Internet every when we provide and so1netimes even without the TV reference. evening. Before Succos and Pesach I encourage its usage! This, in n1y opin In addition to their sale in stores, such adjust it to be off completely. I am the ion, is the greatest obstacle in besting this permanent signs should be offered for only one with access to this firewall. tre1nendous nisayon that is creating havoc sale in synagogues and Jewish centers, Another idea for a business run by men in Kial Yisroel. and recommended by the Rabbi and is to have a two-part password. Both have We have to be very honest with our other congregational leaders. to present to type in their own password. selves, and if we really n1ust 1nake use of SAMUEL M. ScmvARTZ I definitely agree that children have no the Internet, it should be done with a reli ]erusalen1 business on the Internet, period! able shmira (safeguards). Here arc some Browsing idly is also not a good thing for suggestions that may help: CONTROLLING THE INTERNET'S anyone! At best, we're exposing and l)o not place your computer near a INFLUENCE: AN UNFINISHED AGENDA desensitizing ourselves to a decadent phone line. Make sure every time you are culture. connected, a long phone line must be To the Editor: Here are some ideas that arc (unfor pulled across the house (dining room, Thank you so much for addressing tunately) very incomplete. I'd love to see living roon1, kitchen etc.). This \vay, this in1portant issue in such an a committee formed of informed indi whenever someone is online, others are informed way! Up until this last issue, viduals to address all these problems and aware. Of course, this nleans no wire I never ca1ne across any rabbinic author come up with real solutions. I'd suggest less access. (Even though this takes longer, ity who was well informed on the var a service provider that sends a weekly or it may save yourself and your children!) ious issues involved with co1nputers and monthly statement to the user of all sites A password must be used every ti1ne Internet access. This had been a source accessed. That immediately removes the so1neone is online. f)o now allow a child of frustration to me. privacy issue. One who knows that his access alone. We have a graphic design business in actions arc being tracked and will be Children (including older children) the basement of our home, with children played back to him will automatically act should not have their own e-mail who grew up in a very con1puter-savvy differently, even if he's the only one see address. The danger is just too great. environment, so we definitely are very ing it! I have a feature on my firewall that Every person must come up with concerned with all the issues you gives n1e that list, but I'1n son1etimes lazy some idea to protect himself or herself addressed! Your articles were very com to read it through, so I'd go a step fur and his or her children from this prehensive, and I was glad to see so n1any ther and create an Internet provider with tren1endous nisayon. One who sincere of my thoughts reflected there. a hcchsher! Filtering doesn't really work, ly puts forth effort and seeks guidance Aside fron11ny obvious need for the but let there be a panel of people randomly fron1 our Gedolirn \vill ;i"~N see dor co1nputer, e-1nail and Internet, I do agree checking through the lists of websites used. yeshariln u'n1evorach. that con1puters and the Internet are here The problem with that would be the con Again, thank you for the wonderful to stay. Although the comparison to the cern of privacy. For example, if someone's articles concerning this issue. history of television is obvious, the dif checking up a medical condition, he may AVIGDOR NEINSTEJN ference is that television is purely for not want that fact advertised. Baltimore, MI) entertainment and the cotnputer is I still feel that these solutions should becoming a way oflife. The best defense not preclude the strong advice to the gen "AND WRITE IT ON THE will be a good offense. eral public to use the Internet sparing DOORPOSTS OF YOUR HOUSE" I'd like to stress the question of who ly. lt should not be an entertainment tool. arc we trying to shield - the people who Let me end hy saying that by putting To the Editor: are specifically looking for trouble, or the our collective heads together, I'm fully Your Cheshvan issue concerning the average child/adult who natural curios confident that our cornn1unity can danger of the Internet leaves us with a ity needs to be protected. I feel that no con1e up with viable solutions. feeling of defenselessness. matter what precautions we take, son1e- NAME WITHHELD BY REQUEST The Jewish Observer, February 2004 31 SECOND Yonoson Rosenblum LOOKS o'' to Interfaith Dialogue Pointless ... For Good Reason literature. There is no n1ore place in the sage. The nature of dialogue is that one halachic process for the opinions of those elicits concessions and compromises he issue of interfaith dialogue is lacking such a grounding, be they Jew from the other side only by making one of those hardy perennials. A or gentile, than there is for polling syn one's own concessions. England's Trecent conference sponsored by agogue members to determine halachic Chief Rabbi Jonathan Sacks' compar Boston College's Center for Christian practice. ison of interfaith dialogue to marriage Jewish Learning discussed the continued Admittedly, it would be a great boon counseling is highly germane, for in applicability of the ban posed on such if Islamic iinams could be convinced to marital counseling both sides will be dialogue by Rabbi Joseph Ber stop issuing fatwas condoning suicide urged to n1ake concessions. Soloveitchik, the towering figure of bombing. But only the most naive 'rhe controversy surrounding Modern Orthodoxy. would expect theological dialogue with Rabbi Sacks' book The Dignity of Atarah Twersky, Rabbi Soloveitchik's rabbis to be the means of persuasion. Difference provides an object lesson in daughter, insisted that her father's views True, Catholic doctrine concerning the dangers inherent in interfaith never changed, despite the changes in the the traditional charge of deicide theological dialogue. Certainly, inter attitudes of the Catholic Church in the against Jews has changed greatly in faith dialogue has few more enthusi nearly thirty years between the Church recent decades. (Unlike rabbis, the Pope astic proponents than Rabbi Sacks, encyclical Nostra Aetate and Rabbi has the power to enunciate new doc who boasts of having met secretly with Soloveitchik's passing. While her testi trine.) Yet here, too, it is doubtful that a leading Iranian imam and has mony may be dispositive as to her father's Catholic doctrine changed because of expressed his desire to meet with views, it is nevertheless worthwhile theological arguments raised by rab Shiekh Abu Hamzu, of the Finsbury revisiting the issue, if only to understand bis, whose area of expertise is pre Park mosque, a Taliban sympathizer how little such dialogue offers and the sumably not the Christian Gospels. who admits to sharing the views of dangers it poses. Rather, it changed because of the Osama bin Laden. Interfaith dialogue is pointless Church's guilt over its complicity in The quest for interfaith dialogue led because it can change nothing. Halacha, Hitler's Final Solution and the legacy Rabbi Sacks to attempt to construct a or Jewish law, is the province of those of Jew hatred based on millennia of general theory of religion in The with a full command of the vast halachic Church teachings. Dignity of Difference. The result, how ------····--- --~- Rabbi Rosenblum, who lives in Jerusalem, is a ever, severely distorted central Jewish contributing editor to The Jewish Observer. He A Dangerously Blurring Influence beliefs, and forced Rabbi Sacks to is also director of the Israeli division of Ain Echad, rewrite the book after not a single the Agudath Israel-inspired educational outreach nterfaith dialogue is dangerous British rabbi across the Orthodox spec effort and n1cdia resource. Versions of this arti cle appeared in The ferusalen1 Post and the because such dialogue inevitably leads trum could be found to defend it. Balti111ore Jewish Ti1nes. I to the blurring of Judaism's own mes- In the process of constructing his 32 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 general theory, Rabbi Sacks was forced For What Function? effusively hug Rabbi Moshe Sherer, the to deny the absolute uniqueness of the long-time head of Agudath Israel of Revelation at Sinai. "G-d has spoken inally, interfaith dialogue is America, whenever they met. Under to 1nankind in 1nany languages: unnecessary because its absence in Rabbi Sherer's leadership, Catholics through Judaism to Jews, Christianity Fno way prevents the develop and Orthodox Jews worked together to Christians, through Islam to ment of pleasant, fruitful relations productively on a host of issues con Muslirns," he wrote. 1,he price of between people of different faiths. cerning non-public schooling and pub such ecun1enicis111 was to ignore the Religious people do, in fact, usually find lic morality, without ever engaging in Kuzari's classic distinction between large areas of commonality between theological discussions. Indeed, avoid Judaism and any of the other thc1n. Orthodox Jews, for instance, ing discussion of the chasm of belief monotheistic faiths: Judaism alone of experience a much higher comfort between them fostered the ability to the monotheistic faiths is based on a level with evangelical Christians than do inaintain a close alliance. revelation to an entire people, not on secular Jews, despite their eschewal of Pointless, dangerous, and unnecessary the claims of a solitary figure. Nor did theological dialogue. - those should be enough reasons for Rabbi Sacks specify where, when, or The late Cardinal O'Connor would avoiding interfaith dialogue. Ill how G-d is supposed to have spoken to Christians or Moslen1s. Rabbi Sacks again failed to empha size Sinai as a unique event in hurnan history when he blithely asserted that no faith is co1nplete and each has so1ne share of the truth. One wonders what a rabbi will tell a young Jew who defends his decision to marry out on the basis of Rabbi Sacks' book: "What's the problem? Each of our FROM : PER DAY faiths has only part of the truth. 15 90 Together we will possess more truth." TYPE OF CAR "The G-d of the Hebrew Bible FIAT PUNTO 3 DR lov[cs] each of his children for what HUNDA! GETZ 1.3 TOYOTA COROLLA they are: Isaac and Ishmael, Jacob and MAZDA6 Esau, Israel and the nations ... " is a MAZDA MPV U.S.A New york B.M.W 520 lovely, politically correct thought. Tel: 1 ·800-938-5000 But it is also hard to reconcile Rabbi 212-629-6090 Sacks' words with a recent Haftorah www.eldan.co.ll reading - "Yet I loved Yaakov; but Esau I hated ... " (Malachi 1:3), or the Torah's description of Ishmael as a wild GEFEN » .-J. 1nan, "his hand against everyone, and everyone's hand against him." FI~~1k~AL ...' "Yitz" Greenberg, another long Registeced Mongage Brokers ..... time enthusiast for interfaith dia NYS Dept of Banking •• logue, went n1uch further towards Cotpurate Headquarters. 2154 W.10P/ Slv~. •Stolen lslantl. NY 10314 heresy and blurring the distinctions Phone 718-983-9272 • 914-MORTGAGE between Judaism and Christianity. 973-MORTGAGE • 212-983-1000 (Rabbi Sacks did eventually release a revised edition absent the offending passages.) According to Greenberg, Jesus was a "failed Messiah," just as Abrahan1 and Moses were also "fail - ures." Both Jews and Christians err in For careful attention to your advancing exclusive claims of cho senness, according to Greenberg, individual needs, call us today! because there is enough love in G-d "to (845) 354-8445 choose again and again and again." The Jewish Observer, February 2004 33 The Hidden Factor erachos. We all need berachos. We need berachos in our marriages, for are lit, proudly show her Bour children, our health, our par causing wide- best friend how it nestles nassa. We struggle to manage, well spread and irrevocable secure1y in a protective velvet aware that without the Ribbono Shel destruction. Guarding our treasures box, carefully stored every night in her Olam's help, we would have nothing. from the public eye is the best way to pro drawer? How can we find and deserve the bera tect them from ayin hara. An amazing example of the danger chos we so fervently desire? of exposure is found in the most holy Our wise chachamim give us a clear The Sefer Torah Paradigm present that Hashem gave us - the Torah. formula: "Bin haberacha shora ella The first Luchos (Tablets) were given to bedavar hasamui min ha'ayin." Beracha onsider one of our most precious Am Yisroel under the most overwhelm flows only to what is hidden, protected possessions, the sefer Torah. It is ing circumstances: three million indi from the public eye. A bank account that Ckept covered with a velvet man viduals gathered around the foot of is flaunted is unlikely to be enhanced. tel (covering), in a closed Aron Kodesh. Mount Sinai. Against a background of Showing off our children's talents will Only when the sefer Torah is required for utter silence, while all nature held its not bring them success. Publicizing the a mitzva, such as krias haTorah, do we breath, Hashem descended, amidst awe berachos that we do possess is imprudent. take it out and place it on the shulchan. some claps of thunder, flashes of light Why is this so? The reason is simple. Even then, we expose it only minimal ning, and a shofar blast that constantly Publicity means exposure, exposure to ly, for bein gavra legavra - between the increased in intensity. The purpose of the elements beyond our control. Not just readings of the separate portions - it is entire creation, awaited for over two to physical pollution, infection, and again covered. Would anyone regard this thousand years, was about to 1naterial stormy weather conditions, but also to "hiding of the sefer Torah" as an indi ize. Hashem began to speak, to convey the dangers that lurk in people's hearts: cation of embarrassment? Would any the Asseres Hadibros - the Ten envy, jealousy, anger. Feelings of "Why one suspect that we lack respect for it? Commandments - to mankind. The can she have, when I lack?" Ravaging fires Of course not! The opposite is true: we effect was so electrifying that each Jew protect it just because it is so precious! present felt that he could not survive the Mrs. Wagner i1"))', a 1nother and housewife in Would a kalla prance through experience, and had to be revived. This Monsey, NY, also devoted her efforts to teaching in the Bais Yaakov of Monsey, kiruv, and teach Manhattan flashing her new diamond was the single most important event in ing kallos in preparation for n1arried life. ring? Or would she rather gingerly and world history. Yet what became of the first 34 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 Luclws? A mere forty days later they were mother of an older single, would send hope to rise to such a challenge? We can, shattered. Even Torah itself is subject to an unnecessary shaft of pain into an because we each possess a superlative the dangers of exposure! aching heart. Instead, she enjoys the ela counter-force within) combined with a The second Luchos, hewn from plain tion, within herself, at the great chessed powerful support without. Each of us car stone fron1 under Moshe H.abbeinu's tent, that Hashem has prepared for her fam ries a nesha1na tehora, a veritable piece given quietly to him personally on Yorn ily. When dressing to participate in a sim of the Divine. (It is invisible and tzan Kippur, were the ones that survived. They cha, or even simply to go on errands, she ua, but so beautiful. .. indeed, an inspir have survived to this day, hidden from is well avvare that it requires little extra ing role model.) And we all have access human view. May we merit to see then1 preparation, for that morning, as she to a "User's Manual" of how a Jew best soon. arose, she had already made herself look functions, composed with the supra her best for the members of her fami intelligence of the Manufacturer Hidden Treasures ly. She knows that Hashem has endowed Himself. He imparted a taste of this wis her with chein and beauty in order to dom to chachan1in1 in every generation, hazal sharpen our focus on the enhance her home life, and she rejoic giving them the siyata diShmaya to pro topic of beracha with another es in the warmth and closeness of her vide relevant and precise direction in C clear statement: Ein haberacha family. Not for one moment would she every situation. We are indeed well armed metzuya besoch beiso ella bi'zechus ishto. want to stir up envy in the heart of a for the battle of life. In what merit will a man enjoy blessings plainer-looking neighbor, or worse yet, Another reference in Tanach to this in his home? Not in the merit of all the in the eyes of that neighbor's husband. quality of privacy is a statement by Shlomo n1itzvos he has performed, not in the The resultant destruction would be Hamelech: "Ve' es tzenuim chach1na" - merit of his Torah learning, but in the unthinkable. Those who turn inward, and have no need merit of his wife. The father, the husband, to model their behavior on capricious the whole family, are dependent upon An Outward Focus public opinion, are indeed wise! the akeres habayis- the mistress of the All Kial Yrsroel can access this wisdom, household - for the gift of beracha. Torah he modern woman is engrossed but women have a special affinity to it. sets the wo1nan on a pedestal, for in her in sensitive concern for others' Our very essence is connected to tzenius. hands lies the power to determine the T needs; her own ego falls away. In Wasn't Adam Harishon created from direction of the ho1ne, to nurture the developing this sensitivity, she created earth, but Chava from his rib? The hashkafos, the personal perspectives relationships of trust and affection, Midrash describes the care with which and outlooks of its members. As Rabbi and she radiates a halo of beracha. this limb was selected as the building Yosi said: " I have always regarded my Micha HaNavi summarizes the three block of womankind. Other possible wife as far more than my partner, for she basic principles of Yiddishkeit- justice, limbs were eliminated, for their negative is my home." She is the mainstay, the loving-kindness and" hatzne'a leches." He connotations; Chava was not created from foundation, without which the whole teaches us that this quality of privacy, of the mouth, so that she should not chat structure would collapse. Proclaiming this modesty, is one of the primary require ter; not from the leg, so that she should concept from the rooftops would only ments of living a Torah life. We train our not be a "yatzanis" who parades exces serve to cheapen it; it is 1brah, and we selves to look inward instead of seeking sively outside her home, etc. Hashem built learn it and live it. to impress outwardly. We are not play her from a rib, which is covered by a layer It follows that for the wife to bring ing for an audience and dependent upon of flesh, and above that by a layer of skin, beracha into the home, she 1nust utilize its approbation for our sense of self so that she should always be doubly care her wisdo1n to exemplify reticence and worth. We know, and this truth is ful with modesty and privacy. This is the protection. In everyday life, this can be deeply embedded in our consciousness, precious quality of the Jewish woman, visible in many ways. When speaking of that only one Audience counts: audience which helps her focus inwardly on gen her husband's acco1nplishn1ents, mod with the King of kings. He sees clearly uine Torah values, and to reflect these val esty is the guide. Maybe the woman with who we are; before Him all false pretenses ues outward as she comports herself. It whom she is talking is married to a less crumble to dust. When our turn comes is truly her crowning glory. con1petent or Jess successful husband; to play out our lives in His presence, it With such a perspective, the hala maybe she is ?"i a widow. Is it not enough is an opportunity to try to live up to His chos of tzenius become precious and to be satisfied, in her heart, with how spe standards, undistracted by the false sought-after signposts to the greatest cial he is? When she is about to conclude glitter of secular standards, or by the blan success in a woman's life - living up to a wonderful shidduch for a child, she will dishments of our own ego. "Shivisi the standards Hashem has set for her, take care to keep it under wraps till the Hashem lenegdi sami The Jewish Observer, February 2004 35 INSIGHTS AND IMPRESSIONS Mrs. Sarah Shapiro The Bicycle at the ·Beginning of Time xcept for having to share the wheels and a bell. In the careful selec band and I picked up the sound of his child, being a grandmother is a tion of a surefire gift, one that would hit crying somewhere else in the house. Epiece of cake. On this occasion, it the jackpot) I invested money, time) and Lucky for me, friends and relations had was birthday cake, for Binyamin's third great expectations. everything under control, so I birthday. In the taxi on the way over to my remained seated. Over and behind and I vvas never one for running and daughter's house, I was envisioning the beneath and through the music and the jumping and working, but all those years moment of presentation. I would place noise, the crying continued. Friends when my children were small, that's pre it before him. He'd look up at me with and relations were taking care of cisely what I had to do, without end. a1nazement, gratitude, joy and aston everything, so I remained seated. These days, I sleep through the night, and ishment. He'd always remember that it People were waiting for Binyamin for this party, I didn't have to clean and was I, GaGa, who had given him his first to come back for the rest of his hair bake and organize. All I had to do was real bike. cut. He'd been burned out by the pub show up, with a present to buy me his lic spectacle. Friends and relations were love, love that would stay put. taking care of everything, so .... Many dear friends and relations- look hat blessed confusion! Such All of a sudden - something from deeply into those beautiful dark eyes and a big crowd! Friends and nothing! - Binyamin materialized out you know they're shoppers - would also W relations in party hats! Close of nowhere into the party's midst, with be there, bearing gifts. relatives! Distant relatives! People big an expectant look on his face and a For Binyamin's third birthday, I just and small, and music playing! head half-covered with his wild yellow couldn't be outdone. Somebody's hands snatched the bike curls, and all sorts of friends and rela from mine and hid it in a back room, tions were hurrying into the living along with all the other presents. room holding the bicycle aloft. Voices t was a gorgeous contraption, from Bagels and quiches, salads and sang merrily, "Look what GaGa gave a store in downtown Jerusalem. speeches. Halfway through his father's you for your birthday!" as it was set I Blue-green and shiny, with training execution of the first haircut - long down before me. before the cake and ice-cream and pres Binyamin, instantaneously enchant Mrs. Shapiro of Jerusalem is a frequent contributor entation of the presents - Binyamin ed, giving me nary a glance, was to these pages, including "Conversation at a Bar vanished. From our perch on the already trying to get on the bike. Mitzvah" (March. '03 ). Her most recent book is A Gift Passed Along. A Woman Looks at the World couch at the far side of the living room, My husband's eyes met mine. Around I-Ier, published by ArtScroll. through all the commotion, my hus- I can only guess what expression was 36 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 on 111y face at that 111on1ent, but what The moment for all that had ever it was, gorgeous bouquets of ;_1pol slipped irretrievably by, into oblivion. ogy started bloo1ning before n1e in a I tried to enjoy myself, then tried flash, in such a profusion of kindness, faking it, but for me, the party had fall~ that J \vanted to sink into the carpet. en flat. "He got so tired, so we told him about the bike and said he could sit on it for the rest of the haircut. Who gave you t was there on that dead end, after for ll!l age groups· the bike, Binyan1in?" the candles' three flames had been for the Orthodox.Jewish community. l3inyan1in gave no indication of snuffed out and darkness was I Rabbinical references available hearing the question. He 1vas entirely upon the face of the earth, that son1e consu1ned by bliss. one sat down beside inc. I looked up. Home: (718} 338~1765 "Binyan1in, vvhat do you say to It was one of 111y daughters. Jn an P er: (917) 486-5655 Gac;af' undertone, she said: "You feel so bad, I'm so sorry! He "Mommy, I know you feel bad, but kno1vs it's fron1 you, though. We told you have to kno1v that this pain him! Binyan1in, you know who gave belongs to you. Way back at the you the bike. Who gave you the bike?" beginning of ti1ne vvhen J-Jashc1n cre "Binyan1in, say thank you to GaC;a." ated the world, it was part of His plan But he couldn't. J"Te was in anoth that one day there vvould be this bicy er world. cle, this little green bicycle, and that you ' ' ' \vould get it for Binya111in for his third birthday. But maybe you had to have here are times I'd really rather this pain so you wouldn't have to lose not know the truth about son1ething bigger. !Jashe111 knew you T niyself - niuch less have others couldn't be the one to give the bicy know it. Who was the child here? A cle to Binyan1in. So1neone else would Specializing in small batim for a perfect fit. grandn1other is someone who, by have that pleasure." definition, should at least have devel 1'hcy say the universe is expanding, oped enough unselfishness and 111atu that it's expanding fast. All at once, l was rity in the course of a lifetime to place expanding the sa1ne way, into a happi the happiness of her grandchild above ness larger than n1y own, vastly larger her own. Yet in truth, it n1ade no dif than n1y O\Vn. I cut 1nyself a piece of cake, • Each Daf is read, ference to me that he loved the bike, cut a few pieces for friends and relations, translated, and explained slowly and clearly in just that it had made the haircut possible and partook of a bigger love, an endless 20 minutes - not to n1ention the continuation of love, the love that stays put. 1111 • $4 per wpe {plus S&H) the party - no difference that I'd hit • Subscription rate: $3 pi.:r tape the jackpot. What I really wanted - (p!us S&H) and couldn't manage to conceal - was Unde Moishy, Dedi for Binyan1in to kncHv, in his heart, not Avrohom Fried, just technically, that it was I who had and other leading given him the bike. Now I would never Jewish entertainers present him with the bike, as I'd so vividly envisioned, and he would are available CHEVRA. OSEH (!dHESED never, ever look up at n1e, the one to visit OE .AGlJD.A'JJll 1SR.A.EiL who'd granted him his heart's desire, seriously ill with a111azen1ent, joy and gratitude. children BURIAL PLOTS thanks to IN ERETZ YISROEL SIMCHAS CHAVA·w. "'"79 KARKA IN ERETZ YISROEL ""'"' ,,,,, Interment in a Shomer Shabbos Reis M"l' ::?i'l'~ ·1 ro nm Olam near Beis Shemesh Call Rabbi Gavriel Beer for information Ad1esscd project run by on obtaining cemetery plots in Beth Agudath JSracl of America • Please phone or write to: ln conjunttion with ·~~ • • • Chevra Oseh Che5ed of ~dath Israel Shemesh and other locations in Israel. Suki & Ding Productions " •;~ '.- ~ • To set up an appointment call: 'J', 'I 4 42 Broadway, New Yoth, NY 10004 011:972·2·656-9427 (212) 191·9000 Ext.:235-' f'_' ., (2 I 2) 7!17-9000 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 37 SHATTERED MEMORIES I do not recall her last name, or her face, or who she was. [Note: I have since Serene silence of the cemetery - found out that her last name was Rais HaChaim. Rechnitz.] A classmate of my cousin's I House of the Living... must have met her, peripherally, during my visits to Israel Surely I must have endless rows of marble, met her, and liked her, and wished her hlanketing the gentle hills of Har HaMenuchos. well on her upcoming wedding. I have Zeide? Rabbe? Can you hear your little one? only warm memories of meeting the wonderfully warm girls in my cousin's class, though all the names and faces have New Tehillim - a gift, from her betrothed. blurred and melded together into one soft, leather-fresh, gold foil spelling out her name fond memory. name-to-be, as bride - Chaya Nechoma was on that bus ... pages rippling in a sudden breeze. and "that awful tragedy in the news" suddenly made my hands shake and my Will you come to my wedding? Be together with me eyes sting. Time seems so assured - as your granddaughter - if, by planning it, we ensure its contin on the most important day of my life? uation ... Those people on that bus were just like me. And in the cool breeze of sweet Jerusalem - They weren't any more ready to die the soundless voices of Zeide, Rabbe- than I am; they, too, had plans and Who, in Heaven, see and know, dreams for their future ... like I do. in painful joy; to be invited by their child Suddenly, I ached. The Teflon ofindif ference had splintered, and from deep whom they must invite now within me a nameless sorrow cried in to join them on High... pain. And when I heard Chaya Chaya Nechomele? Can you hear, little one? Nechoma's father describe that exquis We will soon, indeed itely painful irony of her yet-full clos ets, and her careful chasuna be together... preparations now empty and purpose less, I could not just clinically nod in shal Perhaps she senses this seeming acquiescence low sympathy. for, hopeful and happy, Because to do so is not to understand. It has to rip through me, and tear me, she continues up the Judean Hills and pain me until I cry out. And when on a journey of prayer it hurts me enough, I can cry. to cry a bride's tears at the Western Wall. And pray. And mourn Chaya Nechoma, and the other kedoshim - for that is what they The sun there is brutal, hot and cleansing are- with words that can only be writ and the tears she cries ten with an open heart. burn their way down her cheeks, May her neshama have an aliya - and she prays, and pleads and be an inspiration to us, who remain here to complete the work of those and dreams, who have been taken: to becon1e better A bride people, better fews, and hasten the arrival praying for her future. of the Moshiach ... which will end all this suffering. Edra Gitel Reich, a teacher and graphic artist, lives in Lakewood, NJ Etka Gitel Reich And suddenly, once again korbanos are offered in Jerusalem - a consuming fire on an altar, not of stone or gold, as in days of yore - but of twisted metal struts and sparking wiring, the melted slag of an Egged bus U'Minchatam KiMedubar... Olah temima pure souls Sacrifices: mothers and children and yeshiva boys and highschool students - and a bride, who came to pray. Her closet is full - of dresses, new still in their plastic. Unworn, carefully chosen and fitted - for Sheva Berachos, for many more happy occasions yet to come that will not, now. of wedding gown, of clouds of lace, delicate pearls which seemed to dance already have life of its own, of promise, in its glittering fmery... once. dulled and deadened, now hanging heavily silent and stiff. The closet is full - sheitlach, cut to frame her face curl lifelessly on the shelf listless locks a-tumble - quiet and purposeless. The closet is full of memories, memories that were and of almost-memories - memories that ought to have been. The closet is full- it is our hearts that are empty. BOOS A review article by Rabbi Moshe Eisemann In Judais1n) the applicable categories are in the case at hand, and, depending upon Emes and Shekker. They are accessible in the poseik's attitude, these will lead to Shas and Poskim. "Go and learn; all else wildly different conclusions. is commentary." A good example is the potentially k~w ino1nent Now, let us for a i1nagine that explosive questions concerning the sta Facing Cu~rent Challenges, by Dr. Kahanism would have won the day - tus of Yon1 HaAtz1naut and Yon1 Yehudah Levi (published by Lambda and Dr. Levi demonstrates that, at least Yerushalayin1, and of \Vhethcr or not one Publishers, Brooklyn, NY) in theory, a halachic model might be con· is to recite" Haller' on either of these tvvo structed to favor such a policy-and the days. After a wide-ranging discussion of bulk of Arabs would have left the coun· the literature, I)r. Levi concludes: Challenging Old Preconceptions try. What would now be the ideal So1ne see Independence Day from arrangen1ent for the reinaining Arab the standpoint of, "When the Books of f any of us picked up Dr. Yehudah population? Would it be better to have Life and Death are open before Hin1, Levi's Facing Current Challenges and dare Israel sing praise?" [and others] I simply glanced at the Table of see it as a tangible part of the process Contents and the chapter notes at the end of the corning of the Messiah. Every of the book, he would gain immeasur· Halachic authority will rule ... in ably, even if he never read another word. accordance with his viewpoint. Many issues ahout vl'hich rnost of us have Such an approach creates a vvelcome opinions based on nothing else than our respite froin the constantly raging bat intuition and personal bias, are 1netic tles between heat and light, which ulously analyzed, carefully researched plague us vvhen positions are taken and vvith sources adduced, and a respectable subsequently defended on the basis of introduction to the relevant literature nothing 1nore than subjective assessments provided. While we may quibble here and which can never be proven or rejected. there \.Vith his ideas, we can have so1ne This book has much to offer when stakes degree of confidence that the feelings are high and disagreements seen1ingly which we form for ourselves based upon intractable. his discussions will, at the very least, have some forn1 of Jewish sanction. Valuable Lessons, Even In Disagreement Here is an example. Essay 51 is enti· tled "Kahanism." l would venture to guess r. Levi's range is breathtaking. that for 1nost readers, this is an intrigu This book can serve as a 1nost ing subject, and that they, as l did, will Deffective commentary to the take a little peek right away to see what them live in separate settlements, or contention of Chazal that, ultimately, is being discussed. The late Rabbi Meir should they be integrated among the gen· everything can be found in the Torah. Kahana .,.··~i1, of course, advocated the era! Jewish populace? Before I read the As I was browsing through the Table of expulsion of all Arabs who were unwill· essay, I would probably have had an opin· Contents, many titles caught my eye. I ing to swear allegiance to the State of ion one way or the other, but I would must admit that I have not read the entire Israel. Nobody was ever neutral about have had no idea at all that there is book, but I did take a respectable sam· Rabbi Kahana; he was loved or he was halachic precedent for this issue. The par· piing from among the many tantalizing hated, admired or reviled. adigm, Dr. Levi tells us, is the gcr offerings. The beauty of the system lies From which ground did these loves toshav, the non-Jew who has committed in the fact that even when one disagrees and hates spring? For most of us, from himself to live by the requirements of the with one or the other point, there is still our attitudes and predilections. Were we seven Noahide laws. The details of Dr. much to be learned. conservative or liberal? Were we tough Levi's analysis need not detain us here. For example, there is the treatment or were we pliant? l)id we incline I have cited this example only to demon· in Essay 6 of "The Torah Economy: to\vards confrontation or accon1moda strate the methodology which is used Capitalist or Socialist?" Now, putting tion? Understandable, all; Jewish, none. throughout the book. extre1nely old wine into very, very new Rabbi Eisemann, a Rebbr in Yeshiva Ner Israel Command of the halachic literature vessels that have been manufactured to of Baltimore, is author of the translation and con1- is, of course, no guarantee that the cor house concepts that are ende1nic to mod n1entary of the ArtScroll/Mesorah Yechezkc/, [)ivrei rect p'sak will follow. The situation to ern times and conditions, is a tricky ven }{ayan1irn, and Iyov, as well as other books under which the halacha is to apply must be ture at best. Nevertheless, Dr. Levi is able private label, including The Maclizor Co111panion correctly understood and, as we all know, to make a creditable case that the Torah and Lighting up the Night. He is a frequent con tributor to these pages. there are often maddening ambiguities inclines towards a system that we would 40 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 label "capitalistic;' while providing safe Welcome Balance vs. n1any years ago, he debated this very issue guards, which) if one were so inclined, Passionately Held Views with Mr. Yosef Friedenson in the pages one could call "socialistic," in order to of The Jewish Observer (November '75). protect against the abuses to which pure ll this having been said, we n1ust At that ti111e, 1 \.vas drawn to the cogency capitalis1n is prone. It is an interesting still note that there are subjects of his arguments, and much of my think essay well worth pondering. A concerning which the author's ing in the intervening years was shaped However, such cogitations can go only views are held so passionately that the by them. Even today, I am in full agree so far before they court the danger of dis welcome balance, which inakes the rest n1ent with the essentials of his position. tortion. There is always the possibility of the book so attractive, is jettisoned. 1'here is, however, a vast difference that in the heat of the chase, caution may I was particularly disappointed in essay between a debate in The Jewish Observer be thrown to the winds and assun1ptions 53, "Religious Parties: Benefits versus in which both sides of the issue are avail made which the sources do not yield. Harm:' Here is why: able to the reader, and the totally one Here is what Dr. Levi \¥rites in this essay For me, this essay has a special history. sided presentation, which we have here. about the Yoveil year: I owe Dr. Levi a debt of gratitude because Nothing is gray in this essay. Religious ... [It] is designed to help the needy .... The Remission year protect ed the Jewish people froin deteriorat ing to a situation in which a handful Subscribe or give a gift of of wealthy landlords owns most of the fields and the vast majority are mere sharecroppers .... The.Jewish Observer Now, one of the halachos of the Yoveil year is that a sh afar is to be blown on the and $ave! Yorn Kippur which ushers in this holy year. We pasken that, absent a shofar, the year does not take on the characteristics WHY NOT GlVE OR GET A PRESENT of Yoveil, and none of its halachos are put 11-IAT WILL LAST AN ENTIRE YEAR? into practice. If the theory behind the re1nissions which the year 1nandates were Subscribe, or give a gift at these reduced prices as Dr. Levi asserts, it is difficult to see why and The Jewish Observer~ filled with the views these should be held hostage to a sho of leading Torah thinkers on current issues - will far being available. Clearly the values be delivered each month, directly to your door. which underlie the complex halachos of the Yovel must be grounded in other than The longer you subscribe for, the larger your savings. social values. W11at these n1ight be con Of course, this offer is unconditionally cerns us less in our present context than guaranteed; you may cancel at any time and receive the observation that even in a work as a .refund for all undelivered copies. valuable as this one, the principle of caveat ctnptor is operative. Not every So order today, and the very next issue will be morsel on this voluptuous smorgasbord on its way to you as soon as possible. of learned analysis should be swallowed uncritically. ------The book is at its best when the issues 0 YES, 1 want to take advantage of this money saving offer! Enter my order as follows: are technical rather than involved in value :J SELF W GlFf IM '()IJTSllll judgments. Essay 39, "Organ (NY lM Addre~s Transplants: Halachic Problems" is an 0 '3 years Cover Price $105 Your cost $60 $96 (llV example. In this essay and in others like CJ 2 years Cover Prier $70 Your cost $44 $68 it, Dr. Levi's expertise as a reno\.vned sci 0 1 year Covrr Price $35 Your cost $24 $36 State .__ ,,_Zip_ entist 1neshes nicely with his admirable .JS\'nd gif! card from: __ con11nand of the tah11udic and halachic .J rndosed $ ____ or sources. The presentations are lucid and GIJ~~~R Ch;irgr my: :..i MasterCard -..l VISA 42 Broadway, 14th Floor, New York, NY 10004 inforn1ative. We leave each of these essays fhc Jl'wi>h Ob>erwr i> p\ibliohtd monthly ntept July and i\U(Jll>l. l\rcounl No.-----·------·---... ----·--··-- PkJ~(' allow 4 - 6 W(•eks for d~liwry. with significant knowledge of what is Expiralion Da\l': (monlh/yearl ______... ,____ _ 'Oulsjde U.S.A. prke rdkrls ), l? e,na per year lo defray :iir >hippin!J involved and, so we 1nust hope, an i1npe to;h. Foreiun poymenl must IJ\' made in U.S. dollar;, <.'ither by rheck tus to study further on our own. drawn on a b~nl; in 111~ U.SJ\_ or by VISA()! Mas\er(Jrd. Signature' -... ----·-··---···-·------ The Jewish Observer, February 2004 41 parties are black, their abolition is white, the needs of Chareidi Jewry in the Jewish Thought." This is, of course, a very and, as they say in Israel, "Gamarnu!" Knesset; and the system of almost uni welcome development. There are few peo Dr. Levi lists no fewer than six ways versal Kol/el study in Eretz Yisroel clear ple more suited than our author to be the in which the existence of these parties can ly represents a different, and legitimate, voice of Torah to these benighted souls. bring about a chillul Hashem, and this approach to the conflicting obligations However, we can expect no Jewish leads to the following concluding para of Torah study and livelihood. Dr. Levi sophistication fron1 these youngsters. graph: is entitled to his own reading of the When they are handed this hook, they In sum, the existence of the religious sources and therefore to his own opin have every right to expect that it is Taras political parties contributes but little to ion on these subjects. However, to the Moshe Emes. Do they have to read - in the strengthening of Torah, while caus extent that the book is addressed to peo fact, does anybody have to read - Dr. ing considerable damage. It may well ple who simply have no clue concerning Levi's bittul (dismissal) of the religious be that whatever these parties achieve these issues, it has the obligation to, at parties? Should they be persuaded that could be obtained without them. the very least, mention that the author's the Kolle! system is appropriate to only Above all, let us not forget the string are occasionally minority opinions. the very greatest scholars when they know of chillulei Hashem which they cause If the book were aimed only at the typ perfectly well that the reality, encouraged through their very existence. ical Jewish Observer readership, none of by most roshei yeshiva, does not conform I am profoundly disturbed by this essay this would be particularly worrisome. All to that model? What might be appropriate and others like it in which the author's of us kno\v the difference between opin in an intirnate setting, a Rebbi teaching ideas are projected as though they were ion and p'sak and realize that no man's his talmidim at )TC, becomes lethal in undisputed daas Torah on a particular ideas, not even those of an admired talmid book form. issue. Essay 29, "Torah Study and chacharn as is our author, are the last word Of course, when Dr. Levi wrote the Livelihood: Competing Obligations," on the subject. book, he had no way of anticipating the co1nes to 1nind as another example. But there's the rub. On the back cover wide exposure that it would have. Had Frequently, there is much room for dis of the book we read: "The Hebrew ver he known, he might well have thought agreement. Many prominent Gedolim sion of this book has been chosen by the twice before putting in some of the mate were insistent upon the importance of Israeli Ministry of Education as reqnired rial. Still, these essays could, and should having religious parties representing reading for the matriculation exam in have been weeded out of the English edi- n•~ THE NEW BAfS YAAKOV SEMINARY @Join tfte ntanll talrnitJos Toho /ta11e sur:cess'/)u//y corttplrtefJ our prof!ra11r! CHINUCH: Earn MAXIMUM .-....C_pend the upcoming year within !C Outstanding content and quality of training credit for <...;;:;:;J the right institution, with the !!II: Prerequisites tor traning as a Speech/Language PathologtSt Limudei Kodesh right chevrah, with the right content. !!«: Special Education - exceptional program in both &"Professional" Limudei Kodesh and General Studies ic Challenging program of Limudei Kodesh Courses COMPUTERS1 ic Faculty of Exceptional Caliber M>: Cutting edge technology !C Fully networked M. Weekly Guest Lecturer Series Mo: Learn 4 (or more) M:: Assistance with !C Opportunity to earn full accreditation Programmhg Languages job placement FINANCIAL as a Licensed and Certified Teacher AID: BUSINESS; Pf.LL, M>: Accounting TAP, REBBETZ!N SORA F. ButKA, 117i"1)0 Classes held AND SEMINARY M Marl<.etng RABBI YESHAYA LEVY, 7roo pt:> at our scf!OLARSHIPS !C Finance AVAlLA.BLE MRS. GITT!E NEUFELD, ASST f'RlNC!Pll!. """ Halacha and Business Ethics Brooklyn and Monsey sites. •" ____ " ___ " ______42 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 tion. I hope that when the book will be reprinted, as it surely deserves to be, that some serious cutting will be considered. Missing: A Disclaimer his leads me to a 1nore general crit icism of the way in which these T essays are presented. Any one who knows this modest, kindly, world. class talmid chacharn and scholar, will know exactly the spirit in which they were other Torah institutions were already written. However, based on l)r. Levi's WORTHY OF RESPECT functioning, before Rabbi Levenberg's words in his introduction, "I hope to pro· attempt to open a yeshiva. I come not, vide our youth with the benefit of my fo the Editor: however, to nitpick. The thrust of this experience and to serve as a conduit for The article, "Torah Shines Forth letter concerns the inaccurate and the words of my teachers and other Torah From New Haven;' by Ari Zivotofsky insulting statement in that article to the giants down through the generations," a (Dec. '03), shed fascinating light on a lit· effect that Yeshivas Rabbi Yitzchak flashing yellow light would be in place. tie-known pioneering effort in the Elchanan in New York and Beis Medrash I have the feeling that not all the opin· Torah history of America. One phrase I.aTorah in Chicago " ... were viewed as ions presented in the book are wholly in the article, however, was less than com 'trade schools' and there still were no those of Dr. Levi's mentors, at least to the plimentary. In contrasting the other yeshivas that taught Toral1 only and in extent that these mentors expressed yeshivas of that time with the Yeshiva of which the learning was purely lishrna." themselves in public. Where this is the New Haven, where only Torah lishma was In 1923, when Rabbi Levenberg case, at the very least, a clearly worded studied, the author described them as attempted to open his yeshiva, only Torah disclaimer should have been provided. "trade schools:' The talrnidim learned studies were taught at both of these As a sourcebook for people interest· Shas and poskim in RJETS and HTC - yeshivas. \Nho "viewed" them as "trade ed in understanding the background some of them lishma - with the inten· schools"? Are yeshivas that produced the against which so many of the "Wars of tion of being prepared to serve effectively congregational rabbis, roshei yeshiva, the L-rd" are being fought, the work is as rabbanirn. These were rabbinical teachers and community leaders that invaluable. However, circumstances have seminaries, institutions geared for pro saved American Orthodox Jewry from conspired to make it an authoritative voice fessional training as rabbis, and worthy being completely destroyed in the 1920s of Torah for the masses. It seems to me of respect. and 1930s to be called "trade schools"? that serious editing is required. RABBI BoRUCH B. BORCHARDT Would the Maitcheter Illuy, Rabbi Having said all this, I return to my New York City Moshe Soloveitchik, Rabbi Shimon unbounded admiration of what this book Shkop, among others, have taught in a accomplishes. Under eight general cat· LEARNING FOR RABBANUS- LISHMA New York "trade school" where there was egories: The Nation and the Land; The no concept of Torah lishma? Or would Interpersonal Dimension; The Jewish To the Editor: Rabbi Nissan Yablonsky, one of the great Family; The Individual and his Soul; In the December 2003/Kislev 5764 Slabodka talrnidim, Rabbi Chaim Zvi Torah and Derech Bretz; Torah and issue of The Jewish Observer, there Rubenstein of Volozhin, Rabbi Chaim Science, Medicine and Technology; appeared an article written by a fine Korb, Rabbi Chaim D. Regensberg, also Events of the Times; The Spirit of the talrnid chacham residing here in Israel among others, teach in a "trade school" Torah, it considers a vast range of issues about Rabbi Yehuda Levenberg and his in Chicago that was bereft of "learning which will satisfy even the most far· rang· attempts to found a yeshiva in New that was purely lishma"? ing minds. Haven, Connecticut, and Cleveland, The article on Rabbi Levenberg and The book has very warm endorse· Ohio, in the 1920s, and 1930s ["Torah his attempts to create a yeshiva in two ments from both the Rishon LeTzion, Shines Forth From New Haven ... and communities that at that time had no Rabbi Ovadiah Yosef, and Rabbi Zalman Cleveland," Ari Z. Zivotofsky]. However, schools of Torah learning could certainly Nechemiah Goldberg, High Rabbinic in the article, the author makes a num· have stood on its own merits without Court of)erusalem. Aside from the reser· ber of factual errors about dates and cer· demeaning two of the other yeshivosthen vations, which I expressed above, I lain omissions that should be brought existing (and, I may add, still existing). believe that it will be an important addi· to the attention of your readers. For Instead, an otherwise fine article about tion to the library of anyone who truly example, in the 1920s, Mesivta Torah a previously little-known Torah per· cares about his Yiddishkeit. • Vodaath, Rabbi Jacob Joseph Yeshiva and sonality is sullied with unnecessary ------·--·------· The Jewish Observer, February 2004 43 and untrue references to other Torah their n1ission the training of rabbis, and ing the history of his grandfather and institutions. J>irkeiAvaswarns us that wise included English and secular studies as the yeshiva he founded. men should be careful in what they say. part of their curriculun1. This was RABBI ARI Z. ZIVOTOFSKY, PH.D. They should also be careful as to what their stated goal, and indeed the evidence Bcit Shc111esh, Israel they write. indicates that, as least a far as RIETS is RABBI BEREI. WEIN concerned, that is what was done froin Jerusalern, Israel the earliest days, including in the 1920s. SIMCHA GUIDELINES, I concluded the paragraph with the sen· WITH A BRITISH ACCENT tence that Rabbi Wein quotes, when I RABBI ZIVOTOFSKY RESPONDS: noted that these schools were viewed by To the Editor: some as "trade schools." The choice of Although some of your readers in the I thank Rabbi B. Borchardt and words may have given the wrong USA are impressed with the thought of Rabbi Berel Wein for their comments on impression and for that I apologize. A a modest wedding with only five musi· my article. Rabbi Wein's three central better choice may have been "profes cians and four hundred guests at the din· points - that one should not denigrate sional schools," and the intention was, ner etc., to many people outside the USA, others in order to elevate oneself, that as clearly explained in the rest of the in places such as Great Britain, a "mod one needs to be careful about what he paragraph, that these yeshivas viewed est" wedding would more likely have two writes, and the recognition of the as part of their mission the training of or three musicians and two hundred important contributions made by rabbis, educators, and Jewish profes guests at the dinner. Bar Mitzva seudas Yeshivas Rabbeinu Yitzchak Elchanan sionals. over here are often extended family din· (RIETS) and Hebrew Theological There was no value judgment ners in the home, which give the Rav a College (HTC) - are well taken, and, of intended in the statement. Nor did I chance to speak to the boy about his new course, I am in complete agreement. state that the learning at RIETS or HTC responsibilities. From Vlrhat I have However, the example he chooses and was bereft of Torah lishma. My statement observed in New York, Bar Mitzvas often that he describes as «inaccurate and was nothing 1nore or less than a point overlap with what would pass for a mod· insulting" and "unnecessary and of comparison between the various est wedding in Great Britain. untrue" was, I think, simply misunder institutions and included no assessment What I really want to point out, how· stood. My article concerned the Yeshiva of relative merit. Indeed, as Rabbi Wein ever, is what I see as a real problem with of New Haven and its founder, Rabbi observed, RIETS and HTC succeeded benching at some New York simchos. In Leven berg, and as background I briefly in educating "the congregational rab· London, immediately after the dessert, addressed some of the other yeshivas that bis, roshei yeshiva, teachers and com the inusician begins "Shir Hanzaalos," and pre-dated it. In the paragraph, of which munity leaders that saved American benching follows straight away, before Rabbi Wein unfortunately quoted only Orthodox Jewry from being complete· anyone can dance and/or depart. J have the final sentence, I explained that ly destroyed in the 1920s and 1930s;' been to nu1nerous simchos in New York Yeshivas Rabbi Yitzchak Elchanan and and many more since then, including where the benching was delayed so long Beis Medrash La Torah viewed as part of the 1955 HTC musmach, the esteemed that we were lucky to still manage a 1nin author of the letter. Indeed, a "profes yan for benching and Sheva Berachos. This sional school," i.e. a yeshiva wherein was a serious anti-clin1ax to the sin1cha, Unde Moishy, Dedi talmidei chachamim are produced who to be deprived of fulfilling the precept Avrohom Fried, also learn skills useful in the rabbinate, that "the King's glory is in His multitude." and other leading as is done in RIETS, HTC, and Chafetz Another problem that probably Jewish entertainers Chaim, and was done in Torah annoys people on both sides of the Ocean, Vodaath, could go a long way towards aside from those in Washington Heights are available advancing Torah causes, certainly here and Golder's Green, is the concept of to visit in Israel. "Je\vish Time;' whereby a dinner sched seriously ill I reiterate, no insult was intended and uled for 7:30 p.m. really bes>ins about 9:30 children none should be perceived. A contrast, not and ends about 2:00 a.m. on a night when a ranking, was being stated. people need to be up early the next morn I would like to take this opportu· ing. Could Simcha Guidelines include nity to offer hakoros hatov that was some suggestions of beginning within AChessed project run by inadvertently omitted from the orig· half-an-hour of the time on the invita· Agudath Israel of America inal article. Much appreciation is ti on and benching straight after dessert? in wnjunction with acknowledged to Rabbi Levenberg's May we merit to share only Suki & Ding Productions • • simclws. To set up an appointment. call: , [•.. grandson, Dayan Yechiel Leven berg of JOSEPH FE!.Il (212) 797-9000 Ext.235 London, for his assistance in research- Baltiinore and London ------··"- --- 44 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 • . •u:.>' ''l~·"1 1M~~ ilie .. types·of' J>h.Qn.e•caus',,;A··'~vetfOm•,mii- ·· · supponersa11~m~a: slli~~··~#.foun~in~ .. of.~e .'W9f1d"'1~~ ~i~t5iie:~of~~~~~ff.;i Be~ ~ f~~et and.1!9~. le~~.~~~ecf: • Cott fe: ..~!1d. tll~*r .• fi~~ ~'.ti'J~. · til:~"~y":;~ord~h~ Ha~·~.~ y~ 2;1 · .. ~·I\ ,si~ifipan~ IU:P;~~~& ... <;i, '~9,,~e ... phon~s .. at. ~11r.11uritl: ?~t;~,r;~ ·i ..... ··~~)· ~.c •• ~911t~f·.·.af:t~.~y• P.u;i;i . i;:o.ti~~l\~tlY ,.t;mging .\Vith ~~<;Iii ne\y.~· Mil• Nit From .... B~okl~~·t0donate(i a §'(JPl>Ot!~~ea}~g in•fromallovet .ttie ,, or th~.. zechtis of his 24''' worl~ t?' ~~ 'tl$ .;jtbr;>ut .. the ·immedi~ con!!~ :Puririt· 'fhe next ~les,~~~ ~live experienced. Jn fact, aa~<- .,...... ~~dµch w~ sugg~sted ... here al'e ·.. $l'.)me1,.:of the stories: And ~~/~9\y,.z.tti~•;Jill'fl happily ~ed. INSIGHTS AND IMPRESSIONS Nechama Ginzberg er gnarled brown hand curved H over the carved wood of the holy chair. She pressed her body closer to the raised birds and flowers on the chair back, her eyes closed, her lips moving silent ly. At first, I wondered who she was, as I tried to position myself to get the best view of the red velvet of the seat and the snowflake-like coverlet that rested on the baby. Curiosity turned to annoyance as she shifted her position and begging or grabbing cakes. They were the blood of the circumcision flowed, I blocked my camera's view. I pressed tightly around the chair, prayed that the wanton blood-letting of stepped to the side, and was eyes closed, lips moving in sup our nation ... both physically and spir- about to ask her to do the plication. Their hands were itually, be stopped .... And above all else, same, when I noticed that spread open, palms up, fin I prayed for return ... to our land ... to there were four or five of them. gers beckoning; as if they were our souls ... to our Source. They were each different, and yet welcoming a presence that I, as yet, so alike. Their faces baked brown by the could not see. oo soon, it was over, and I was Mediterranean sun, were full of wrin As I continued to watch, the lines in being passed the cup of blessing. kles ... lines that mapped the stories of their faces softened; and, when opened, T I was about to take the first sip, their lives on their skin. Their scarves their eyes sparkled with a clarity of when I felt myself surrounded. The wrapped their heads like crowns. Their vision. I began to sense a sensitivity and beggar women had left their posts clothes were a patchwork of many col refinement of soul in them that left me around the chair to encircle me, their ors, 1nismatched and tattered ... peas feeling ashamed and clodlike. A shift in hands outstretched, beseeching me to antlike. I remember thinking that they perspective, ever so slight, and suddenly pour the healing liquid into their must be beggars, coming to the bris to I felt an opening within that allowed the upturned palms. For a moment, I felt catch a free meal and to beg. light to enter. The vision took my breath my old sense of indignation rise up I was the elegant grandmother come away! The king's messenger. .. Elijah ... inside me. Don't I come first? After all, from America, skin smooth and pam come to heal and bring peace ... my tiny I am the grandmother! And what about pered) dressed in fine maroon wool with new grandson nestled in his arms ... and my daughter, and my mother, and all delicate velvet roses appliqued all I was busy taking pictures. our honored guests? Didn't these around. Red roses ... blood red ... like the I let the camera slip from my hands and beggar women have any sense of the blood of the convenant. covered my face. The hot tears bathed my socially appropriate hierarchy of Blood ... blue-blood ... refined ... cheeks. To think that I had almost let this importance at this simcha? aristocratic ... our ancestral line reach moment slip by. The chance to beseech I hesitated for a moment, and then I ing back ... impeccable ... and here was I-Iis 1nessenger to intercede with the King looked into their eyes. Their yearning, I, the proud grandmother ... refined and for the healing and peace that we, that I, reverence, and faith put my sense and elegant ... annoyed at the peasants who so desperately needed, and almost had lost. honor and hierarchy to shame. I lowered were blocking her view. I realized then that rather than blocking the cup without taking a sip ... for truly my view, it was they who had clarified it. the first portion belonged to them. And t took a while; but as I continued to The tears flowed freely, and the as I poured the libation of dark red wine snap away at the ritual unfolding before words of prayer and longing followed onto the altar formed by their hands, I I my camera's eye, they kept coming into swiftly in their stream .... I prayed for felt myself being elevated to a place I sharper focus. I noticed that they were not peace ... for our tiny country... so that hadn't known before ... a place where we Mrs. Ginzberg, CSW is a social worker in pri this newest memher of our people were truly one ... where the red wine vate practice. She is the mother of seven children, could have a chance to grow ... to take being poured out was the red blood of four of whom live in Yerushalayim. The grand root in the land of his fathers ... to drink circumcision ... the blood of connec son whose bris is described in this article was from its holy waters ... to flower ... to na1ned Yitzchak Elchanan, in memory of her tion ... a royal blood line that stretched father, Reb Itche Topola. This is her first appear thrive. I prayed for wholeness ... for our its way back to Abraham, and bound us ance in these pages. depleted people ... and for myself.. .. As all forever to our King. • 46 The Jewish Observer, February 2004 <·.• · :"'>\ .'-/, ,,,_::')·'.;:.\ '.'\ OEJ•IGR &. t.R~DUT· •.. !lAYSt~pCJ~~ES.~;~~!~~!!:~$••~ 11 •. STEE~.•fl !~~Tl~ s•. •· ·················.:···· ; 1111.SIJE fµRNl~Hl.~G~·····•··•.···• ...... •....) f••·· DI SCHOOL & CAMP EQUl~~~.~f•.~:. 11 BA~~ETBALL & VOLLEY9ALl ······· SYSTEMS 1111 RUBBER RESIUENTFLOORING II ETC; • Equipment meets or exce.eds allASTM•and CP~C safety guidelines • Sit~.;pl~n~ing.and d~sjpn. s.e~~ic~s with state~oMhe"'art Au UrCAD • sraJ.9!~~~·;~\~·~1· fabri~atio~.;f~r ullimatetilstres· · · · 100 B.•.•~ .• NN~lAVENUE ••..•.... ·....•••...... ,N~v/ BARRY lECH CENTER westbiiry, NY BROWNSVILLE GARDENS BrookfJIJJ, NY NASSAU BDGES GoJdelJ. CUy, NY R~t.~B()W,RHYl'llES CENTER •i•;!•, .> . Bronx, Ny RICHNIONI> GARl>ENS Great Neck, NY - THERESA OF AVILA SCHOOL · ' cl • Ozone Park, NY .pa rl~ '"~c... ::,.:, . . .~,.~ ·ctu.'1 ·~ ·' / ri.. , ·· 1.. s.tru. es : ~·,,. • MaX:!;:i~~,fhe ~~tent~;!"?f~!~riM ,, " ' ) ,•,' ' ' / ' The Jaffa Edition hul humash This new all-Hebrew edition of the Chumash is specifically designed and constructed for synagogue use! large, clear type on 8%" x 1 O" pages makes it easy to read and follow the Torah reading; and ll!.!! ultra-reinforced side-sewn binding means there will be no need to rebind these durable volumes. despite heavy use. for many. many years to come. Gilded page heads add dignity and importance to each volume. The text of the Torah, Haftaros, Five Megillos, and commentaries - Onkelos, Rashi, lkkar Sifsei Chachamim, and Baal HaTurim - in this new Chumash have all been reviewed for total accuracy. • Torah and Onkelos texts begin each page at the same word. • Markers indicating the Sabbath Minchah/weekday aliyos. • Dozens of explanatory illustrations, diagrams, and charts. • The pesuchos and setumos are presented visually, as they appear in a Sefer Torah. The features and sturdy construction of The Shul Chumash make it ideal for school and home use, as well. The 17-booklet Personal-Size Sapirstein Edition Rashi Set is now available in a deluxe hard slipcased gift edition ·. The clarity and reader-friendly qualities of the Sapirstein Edition Rashi have made it a best- - selling and much-used aid in the study of Chumash. So pop- 'tile: SA: !RST(!tN (!tl!TION ular, in fact, that the public is clamoring for a convenient small- ::::-_-_-~:--\rei~ size version. Responding to this demand, ArtScroll is proud to .J\( ~ff~~ introduce the personal-size edition of this masterpiece. Also available - each Chumash in a separate slipcase. ----~-- _t·--~~ PE RS 0 NA L Available in a series of small 4%"x6" paperback booklets, each with several parshiyos, this edition Si ZE includes all of the features of ArtScroll's classic Sapirstein Rashi: the Torah text with English translation; Rashi in "Rashi script"; Rashi elucidated in English, with annotations to further explain this seminal commentary; and the appropriate Haftaros. All in a size you can put in your pocket or purse, ready to go with you for your daily study. They came from all walks of life, from different countries, from differing religious backgrounds. The amaz ing men and women described in the pages of this book had one thing in common -an indefatigable determination that drove them to serve G-d and man in the worst of times. R' Wolf Frey belonged to this group. With unshakable faith, with remarkable foresight and bravery, against impossible odds, he resisted Evil Incarnate. He never thought of himself as a hero, but his courage and inge nuity will remain with you forever. Budapest '44, his story, is an unforgettable tribute to the human spirit. By Moshe Holczler. Prepared for publication by Miriam Greenwald.