e Independent Student Newspaper

Number 778 Friday 28th February 2014

Published in Cambridge since 1947 www.varsity.co.uk

e Oscars Graduate Gamblers Helena Pike Hannah Wilkinson speaks to the students that are on why there’s more to fi lm

gambling with their careers P18 Vulture than awards

MATHIAS MARX MATHIAS CUSU fi sh fail to hook students

Jack McConnel News Correspondent

Only 1 in 5 students say they will vote in the upcoming CUSU elections, and 14 per cent do not even know what CUSU is, a poll conducted by Varsity has found. e poll of 192 students also sug- gests that 26 per cent did not know the diff erence between CUSU and the Cambridge Union Society. One fi rst- year student from Jesus said: “I love CUSU because they got me to meet Russell Brand.” It was revealed earlier this week that no candidates will run for two permanent salaried sabbatical posi- tions of CUSU co-ordinator and wel- fare & rights offi cer, while three posi- tions are uncontested. ese include the Presidential candidate, Helen Hoogewerf-McComb, as well as the candidates for women’s offi cer and education offi cer. Flick Osborn, the current CUSU president, said it was “disappointing” “I’m current public enemy number one”: Len McCluskey spoke to Trinity Politics Society about Unite’s maligned Labour links (p. 5) that there are fewer nominations for CUSU-GU sabbatical positions than in previous years: “CUSU have trialled many new methods of engaging with Harassment policies are ‘shocking’ students about elections this year.” e publicity campaign for the elec- tions consisted primarily of a depiction Sexual harassment sexual harassment or assault. Downing, with its policy stating that Centre, said that she found the word- of a goldfi sh jumping into a larger bowl. CUSU Women’s Offi cer Lauren the college hopes that most cases of ing of some of the policies “shocking”. Posters of the cartoon were displayed policies in colleges fail to Steele said that the complaints proc- harassment can be dealt with by “pro- e University’s Dignity@Study in colleges and on CUSU’s website. protect students ess “is often not oriented around the viding information about the conse- policy, upon which a number of col- Two thirds of students surveyed student’s needs and desires but taken quences of off ensive behaviour,” with leges base their own complaints poli- did not know the name of the current Hannah Wilkinson into members of the college’s hands,” the aim of “establishing communica- cies, says: “If your complaint is not CUSU president, while 90 per cent of and that “the inconsistency across tion between the individuals involved”. upheld and is found to be malicious students said they were unaware of how Investigations Editor colleges and lack of specifi ed proce- Amelia Horgan, a former Women’s or vexatious, disciplinary action may CUSU has aff ected them this year. dures means that cases may not always Offi cer at King’s, is currently helping be taken against you.” is wording is However, Osborn argues that “many Sexual harassment policies of colleges be handled with these Best Practice to draft a revised sexual harassment widespread in University harassment students have engaged positively with at the University of Cambridge could Guidelines at play.” policy for her college. policies across the country. CUSU” this year. She said that CUSU cause “distress to students”, a Varsity A number of college policies suggest She wanted to create a policy sensi- “All the emphasis here is on potential has “consistently worked on issues that investigation has revealed. that as far as possible cases should be tive to the psychological trauma caused victims being accused,” Al-Ani said. students really care about”, citing the ere are marked discrepancies resolved informally. by encounters between the complain- “It perpetuates the myth that those Living Wage campaign, the campaign in the procedural clarity of policies Emmanuel College’s policy states: ant and the accused. who experience sexual violence make on socially responsible investment across the University. Concerns have “Since formal complaint is commonly She said: “We wanted to keep the false allegations. and the petition against the govern- also been raised over inconsisten- stressful and burdensome to all par- students separate until the investiga- “In reality the number of false sexual ment’s immigration bill signed by a cies in welfare provision detailed by ties, it is important to make every ef- tion was carried out, which included harassment and assault allegations are thousand students. the policies. fort to achieve resolution informally allowing them to live in separate places extremely low.” George omas, president of the Harassment policies describe what before resorting to it”. if that’s what they wanted.” Maggie Bridge, the Women’s Offi cer JCR at Peterhouse cites the “decentral- actions an institution will take should Resolving complaints through me- Norah Al-Ani, the Development at Gonville and Caius, criticised the ised nature of the Cambridge colleges one of its members report a case of diation is cited as the best option at Offi cer at Cambridge Rape Crisis CONTINUED ON PAGE 4 CONTINUED ON PAGE 6 Reviews: Lars von Trier’s Nymphomaniac Parts 1 & 2 (p. 28) 2 Friday 28th February 2014 Editorial 11 News Cambridge Israel Apartheid Week has enfl amed the ongoing student debate ? about the Israel-Palestine situation 1 4 Zero tolerance policies

Comment is week’s Varsity investigation has uncov- experienced some form of sexual harassment – a found to be one of the main obstacles to reach- Harshadha Balasubrama- ered the current inadequacy of college sexual stark illustration of the extent of the issue. ing a satisfactory outcome in these cases. While harassment policies across the University. e While it is clear that there is a wider problem, more formalised welfare training for new col- nian on making the policies are inconsistent, and many lack clarity there are obvious issues at Cambridge which lege tutors should address this in part, it is not most of Cambridge regarding the procedure that should be followed. must be addressed. e lack of transparency enough. is means the decision to come forward with a about college procedures and some of the lan- ere needs to be an urgent review of college student life without the complaint is more diffi cult, particularly consider- guage used suggest that there is a university-wide sexual harassment policies, which diff erentiates ability to see ing the emotional state of someone that has been culture where the greater concern is to hush up sexual harassment from bullying and racial har- sexually harassed. complaints, rather than seeking to discipline assment. A policy concerning sexual harassment e lack of clarity and discrepancies across those found guilty of sexual harassment. should clearly detail each stage of the procedure, colleges is perhaps refl ective of a wider cultural e focus on informal resolution in a number and who to go to for advice. In fact, Jesus College problem where sexual harassment is often not of the policies seems to be indicative of this. already has a policy that does this and there is dealt with directly, and where many are ignorant Emmanuel College’s policy, for example, which no reason why other colleges should not follow of the prevalence of sexual harassment. ere is taken from the University Student Handbook, suit. Examples of what constitutes sexual harass- has been a distinct lack of research into sexual states: “Since formal complaint is commonly ment and what actions should be taken in each 2 harassment policy in the UK, with a recent NUS stressful and burdensome to all parties, it is instance would be a welcome addition to college 0 report on ‘lad culture’ noting that research into important to make every eff ort to achieve resolu- policies. ere should also be no implications in “violence against women students in the UK tion informally before resorting to it.” the language that complaints will not be taken is still in its infancy”. However, in 2010, 68 per Anecdotal experience suggests that a lack of seriously or brushed aside. We need a zero-toler- VVulture cent of students questioned were found to have training and general understanding has been ance policy to sexual harassment that works. Not our forte? Jackson Caines laments the year’s Reclaim the Night march. People spoke on the streets at night really only harnessed if of the empowerment they felt as they walked its a group of just women marching. She said of less than thriving through the streets course the campaign were trying to get as many student music scene in men to help as possible and pointed me to a However, this anger was matched by the sense solidarity march for all men who wanted to help. Cambridge of solidarity throughout the group, a solidarity It was 100% reasonable, and I genuinely felt my born of a confi dence that those around us were assistance in the movement was wanted! supportive of our desire to speak out and shout about issues too often shut down. e problem is that it was so simple for me to Write to us fi nd out that men weren’t at all ‘banned’, that we [email protected] Rhiannon Lloyd-Jones, Girton could all be involved, that there was potent sym- bolism at work, that it seems curious to me that        the people quoted here cared not even to ask a 3 I can’t help but feel the many comments and simple or quick question when something (sup- 0 In Reclaim the Night we marched to demand jus- commenters who address the ‘banning men’ posedly dear to their hearts) seemed wrong? tice for survivors of sexual assault, to empower and ‘women only’ aspect of the march only the 95% of women who told More magazine betray their own complete laziness/apathy and When people hear bad stories about the women’s in 2005 that they don’t feel safe on the streets (bordering on wilful) ignorance for feminist campaign why do they always never ask the at night and to put the issue of female safety, activism, rather than sharing any real concern for campaign members directly? I can only assume Sport regardless of the time of day, onto a platform of ‘feminism’. it’s because people actually don’t care enough For the Love of Sport: discussion. about the movement to go through the bother of When I had these same concerns well before that, and you end up with half baked anecdotes Matt Worth dusts off his e impact it has had in Cambridge was clear, the event, I simply pinged a quick message to that make all of us (both outside and inside the bow and arrow and tries opening speeches from leaders of the feminist someone involved, and she reasonably and Women’s campaign) look bad. society at Anglia Ruskin described how they kindly pointed out that the some of symbolic out the medieval sport of had been inspired to start up their group by last power of trying to make it safe for women alone Eric Hambro, Magdalene archery

E  Emily Chan EDITOR @VARSITY .CO .UK D E  Amy Hawkins DEPUTYEDITOR @VARSITY .CO .UK B M Michael Derringer BUSINESS @VARSITY .CO .UK P   D E  Mike Curtis PRODUCTION @VARSITY .CO .UK N E  Martha Elwell (Senior), James Sutton & Chloe Cli ord-Astbury (Deputy) NEWS @VARSITY .CO .UK N F  I E  Hannah Wilkinson NEWSFEATURES @VARSITY .CO .UK C E  Louis Degenhardt, Ra aella Taylor-Seymour (Deputy) COMMENT @VARSITY .CO .UK S E  Toby McMaster SCIENCE @VARSITY . CO .UK M  E  Helena Pike MAGAZINE @VARSITY .CO .UK L   Gigi Perry LIFESTYLE @VARSITY .CO .UK C   ea Hawlin, Franciska Fabriczki CULTURE @VARSITY .CO .UK T  Aron Penczu THEATRE @VARSITY .CO .UK F  Jacob Mallinson Bird FASHION @VARSITY .CO .UK R Caroline Hopper REVIEWS @VARSITY .CO .UK S E  Matt Worth SPORT @VARSITY .CO .UK I E  Jilly Luke INTERVIEWS @VARSITY .CO .UK I E  Emily Handley INTERNATIONAL @VARSITY .CO .UK O  E  Edd Bankes S M  E  Jess Franklin C  S E  Daniel Simpson C    S -E  Raphael Gray SUBEDITOR @VARSITY .CO .UK S S -E  Jess Baker, Grace Readings P E  Daisy Scho eld PHOTO @VARSITY .CO .UK Chief Illustrator June Tong ILLUSTRATION @VARSITY .CO .UK L A  M Alice Taylor and Sophie Rutherford LOCAL @VARSITY .CO .UK V B Dr Michael Franklin (Chairman), Prof. Peter Robinson, Dr Tim Harris, Chris Wright, Michael Derringer, Aliya Ram (VarSoc President), Chloe Stopa-Hunt ( e Mays), Nicola Love (BlueSci), Alice Udale-Smith, Emily Chan & Amy Hawkins

NEWSPAPERS SUPPORT Varsity, Old Examination Hall, Free School Lane, Cambridge CB2 3RF. Tel 01223 337575. Fax 01223 760949. Varsity is published by Varsity Publications Ltd. Varsity Publications also publishes BlueSci and The Mays. RECYCLING Recycled paper made ©2014 Varsity Publications Ltd. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means electronic, mechanical photocopying, recording or otherwise without prior permission of the publisher. up 78.9% of the raw material for UK Printed at Iliffe Print Cambridge — Winship Road, Milton, Cambridge CB24 6PP on 42.5gsm newsprint. Registered as a newspaper at the Post Offi ce. ISSN 1758-4442 newspapers in 2011 NEWSPAPERS SUPPORT News Friday 28th February 2014 3

“BEING HOMELESS AND GOING “I’d rather live in a TO CAMBRIDGE MADE ME FEEL Nymphomaniac bin than work in a QUITE LIKE A FISH OUT OF high-up position in WATER” m MacDonald’s” Week 7 Poppy Noor on fi nding a home in Value of new Stephen Hawking Job snobbery: a pandemic Cambridge professorship (p. 14) (p. 12) (p. 9)

THE TOP 5 ONLINE News meeting 5pm on Thursday, The Maypole 1. Interview: Ha-Joon Chang Comment meeting 2. eatre: Grey Matters 5pm on Monday in Varsity offices 3. VarsiTV: Arcsoc Cabaret, Voluptuosous We’re looking for photographers and illustrators. 4. An open letter on rape culture Email [email protected] for more information 5. For the love of sport: Karate 4 Friday 28th February 2014 News

CAMBRIDGE COLLEGES SEXUAL HARASSMENT POLICY CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1 section of her college’s general policy GIRTON which states that it “will take less seri- FITZ JESUS GREEN ously comments and suggestions that seem frivolous”. She said: “A report of CHURCHILL ? ? sexual harassment or assault is never MURRAY EDWARDS ‘frivolous’. It shows a real lack of nu- anced thought about this issue, and MADINGLEY ROAD MAGDALENE therefore a real lack of any kind of proper provisions for it as and when instances arise.” Jennifer*, who reported an incident of sexual assault involving a tutor at her college, said that she found the JESUS words “vexatious or malicious” intimi- dating. She said: “When you’re low and JOHNS ? have just been victimised, the fear of saying the wrong thing is so strong: the JESUS LANE idea that your words could potentially be scrutinised and that you could be ? penalised for what you say is always in back of your mind”. SIDNEY She also pointed towards lack of clar- ity in her college’s harassment policy: TRINITY “I approached a tutor who had to check CHRISTS PIECES the college guidelines irst as reporting of cases is so rare. When I saw them I ? was unnerved by the shortness of the GRANGE ROAD CHRIST’S ? policy. It didn’t seem very clear”. CAIUS Policies are often brief, with bullying ? and harassment dealt with under the TRINITY HALL same procedural guidelines. Gonville and Caius does not have a sexual har- ROBINSON CLARE assment policy that is independent of their general complaints procedure, KING’S KING’S PARADE EMMA “I FELT SO SCRUTINISED CORPUS ? AND SO VULNERABLE THAT CATZ ?

QUEENS ROAD QUEENS REGENT STREET ALL I WANTED TO DO WAS QUEEN’S GET OUT OF THERE AS WEST ROAD QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE” PEMBROKE SELWYN ? DOWNING and four colleges – Sidney Sussex, Trinity Hall, Fitzwilliam and Girton – PETERHOUSE do not have a sexual harassment policy individual to their college. SIDGWICK AVENUE DARWIN Al-Ani emphasised the importance of standalone policies that deal with NEWNHAM HOMERTON sexual harassment and assault. “If it’s WOLFSON incorporated into a general policy, it becomes diicult to give it the space to describe what it is, and it shows that the college isn’t recognising the experiences of students.” She added: “Standalone policies show that the col- lege is taking the issue seriously”. ? Often students are called before disciplinary bodies for the formal No speciic Unclear formal Dedicated Clear sources of harassment oicer “A REPORT OF SEXUAL harassment policy procedure support HARASSMENT OR ASSAULT TrinityTrinity Hall’s Hall’s harassment harassment policy Girton’sGirton’s sexual sexual harassment harassment proce- ClareClare Harassment Harassment Oicer Oicer Cathie Cathie MostMost colleges colleges dedicate dedicate an an area area of was not available online. Instead dures simply state: “Any individual Clarke says: “I think that the role of pftheir their policy policy document document to to listing list- IS NEVER ‘FRIVOLOUS’” the college stated its “approach” via who considers that another’s behav- Harassment“I think Oicer that is the a useful role one of ingsources sources of welfare of welfare both both internal inter- an FOI. iour (whosoever that person may Harassmentin the College Oicer even though is a useful the oc-one nalsources, sources, including including tutor, tutor, chap- Fitzwilliam, Sidney Sussex, be) falls into the category of sexual incasions the College on which even I am though called the on areoc- lain, college nurse, and external and Girton refer students to the or racial harassment, may consult casionsinfrequent. on which Each demands I am called a difer- on are sources, such as the University complaint to be investigated. Jennifer University’s Dignity@Study Policy. their own or any of the Tutors, the infrequent.ent approach. Each he demands priority isa alwaysdifer- Counselling Service, Linkline, and suggests that this process was unsym- Caius devotes one article in its College Nurses, or the JCR Welfare entto ind approach. a solution he that priority is in theis always the Cambridge Rape Crisis Centre. pathetic to the sensitivity of her case: “I general complaints procedure to or WomensWomen’s Oicer.” tobest ind interest a solution of the that people is in afected the best Jesus college details appropriate wasn’t treated as a vulnerable witness. I detailing the process for sexual Most colleges go on to specify the interestwhile at ofthe the same people time afected maintaining while sources of support which can be ac- felt like I was being closely scrutinised harassment. formal process and how it should be atconidentiality the same time and maintaining respecting coni-the cessed by students at each stage of and questioned, and that a lack of sen- initiated. dentialitywishes of complainants.”and respecting the wishes the complaints process. sitivity was shown whilst dealing with of complainants.” that very painful period of my life.” “I felt so scrutinised and so vulner- can go for support at each stage. in person from members of staf. At a for students, has been approved and Steele noted that the University is able that all I wanted to do was get out Seven colleges have dedicated number of colleges, students are asked commended to Colleges for adoption working with the Women’s Campaign of there as quickly as possible”. Harassment Oicers. to initiate the complaints procedure by the Senior Tutors’ Committee. “in potentially reviewing and creating Most colleges detail a comprehensive Al-Ani says that it is “essential” that themselves by describing their experi- As independent legal entities, it is policy at both University and college list of internal and external sources of students be made aware of sources of ence in a formal letter, often without appropriate for Colleges to have their levels, introducing training and work- welfare advice. However, six colleges – welfare support throughout the proc- any guidelines or template for this let- own complaints and review proce- shops for staf and students”. Churchill, Corpus, Fitzwilliam, Caius, ess. “Otherwise it could have a hugely ter and with no support. dures within the context of this guid- For Jennifer, these changes will come Queens’ and Selwyn – make no clear detrimental impact on someone’s self A spokesperson for the University ance. Colleges are always prepared too late. “I felt like I was the guinea pig,” reference to welfare provision for com- conidence and self belief”. said: “he Dignity@Study guidance to discuss areas where there appears she says. “It’s good that procedures can plainants in their harassment policies. At St Catherine’s, Queens’, and sets out recommended procedures for to be a lack of clarity. his is best be ixed after it all comes to light, but Only Jesus College makes reference Pembroke, guidelines ask for students dealing with complaints of inappropri- done through student representation for the test cases the system often fails to sources of welfare throughout the considering making a complaint to ate behaviour across the University. he on appropriate committees for to protect vulnerable students”. process, specifying where complainants collect their sexual harassment policy guidance, which is intended primarily student welfare.” *Name changed to protect identity News Friday 28th February 2014 5 Cambridge professor Labour funding cuts are coming, says Unite leader slams latest Women in Science report McCluskey says Tories use him as ‘baseball bat’ James Sutton against Ed Miliband ANTHONY MCK Deputy News Editor Dame Athene Donald, professor of Louis Degenhardt experimental physics at Robinson Col- Comment Editor lege and a supporter of gender equal- ity movements in academia, has at- Unite, the largest union in the UK, tacked a report produced by the House will consider slashing donations to of Commons Science and Technol- Labour by half, general secretary Len ogy Committee for being “fairly weak” McCluskey has suggested. Speaking in its recommendations. in Cambridge on Wednesday evening, Speaking to Varsity, she said that he acknowledged that the relationship the focus of the recent report, which between Unite and Labour needed re- aimed to establish measures for in- form, telling the audience to expect a creasing women’s role in the academic signifi cant announcement next week. sciences, was misjudged. She said the He pointed to internal Unite polling, recent report “called on higher edu- which indicates that only 50 per cent cation institutions collectively to do of the union’s members are Labour more. Cambridge doesn’t need to be voters. Unite currently gives around told this because we are already hard £3 million per year to Labour. at work on the issue and I think so are many other universities.” She said that many of the issues af- fecting women’s involvement in sci- “FROM TIME TO TIME THE The relationship between Unite and Ed Miliband’s Labour party has become fraught ence were outside the control of uni- MEDIA NEED AN OGRE – I’M versities, and that the report failed to rent public enemy number one.” think Labour will end up as the larg- actions, which he argued amount to acknowledge this. THE CURRENT PUBLIC ENEMY “[ e media will] try to use that to est party, and I think they may just fall “robbery in plain sight.” “Funders may have processes in destroy the message of people coming short of an overall majority.” He said He addressed Cambridge students place that disadvantage women in NUMBER ONE” together, resisting and trying to defend that it was up to Ed Miliband to “off er specifi cally, urging them to aspire to quite subtle ways.  e short term con- the way of life that we’ve been used to a radical alternative.” Nick Clegg, he more than “a big house in the country” tracts that are the typical lot of early for the past 65 years,” he said, “since said, is a “soggy Lib Dem sieve.” and driving a Porsche, acknowledging career researchers upon completion In an interview with Varsity, Mc- the end of the war and the creation of McCluskey was in Cambridge to ad- that he was speaking to “our future of their PhDs was one issue raised. To Cluskey said that the Tories use him the welfare state.” dress the Trinity Politics Society, where generation of leaders.” modify this pattern of employment “as a kind of baseball bat to hit Ed Mili- McCluskey also repeated the calls he he launched a new leverage campaign Regarding the potential changes would need a huge, collective discus- band over the head with. And we’re made on Newsnight this week for Ed targeting the private healthcare “vul- to the fi nancial relationship between sion of many bodies, most notably in- conscious of that – that means I have Miliband not to join with the Liberal tures” he says are preying on the NHS. Unite and the Labour party, a spokes- cluding funders. Personally I believe to be a bit more careful of what I say Democrats should they fail to achieve He was damning in his criticism person for Unite said yesterday: “ e many of the problems are societally- and how it can be distorted.” an outright majority in 2015. of the government’s healthcare re- level of our affi liation to the Labour based. For young girls contemplating He added that “from time to time Speaking about his predictions for forms, saying that Unite will ensure Party and funding will be discussed STEM subjects it is hard for them to the media need an ogre – I’m the cur- next year’s elections, he told Varsity: “I politicians are “accountable” for their next week by our executive council.” fi nd role models.” Interested in postgraduate journalism training?

A major scholarship and/or bursary may be awarded to students graduating from the University of Cambridge or ARU who are about to undertake an approved course in journalism in the coming academic year.

Past beneficiaries of the awards have gone on to successful careers at a variety of media organisations.

For further details on the Trust and to check eligibility, visit www.varsitytrust.org.uk or email [email protected] for an information pack.

Deadline for applications: 5pm, Monday April 28 2014

The Varsity Trust offers funding to students planning to undertake journalism courses in 2014-2015. Registered Charity No. 1012847 6 Friday 28th February 2014 News

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1 VARSITY POLL DO STUDENTS CARE ABOUT CUSU? and their respective JCRs” as the main what to think of them.” reason for the lack of student engage- Ivan Tchernev, President of King’s ment with CUSU. College Student Union, is more posi- Are you aware of how CUSU has affected you? He added: “A lot of the work CUSU tive about CUSU, though he is “sad- does is with JCR committee mem- dened by the lack of interest in sab- bers rather than students themselves. batical positions.” Yes No Absence of engagement from the He said: “Any institution that gives majority of students should therefore out free condoms to all its students is come as no surprise.” clearly doing something right. Rachael Anderson, a fi rst-year stu- “CUSU has an image problem, and dent at Jesus, said: “I wish CUSU one that’s hard to overcome. CUSU Will you vote in the CUSU elections? would reach out more at a college has to deal with all of the problems of level.  ey’re too distant and no-one’s student apathy, and has none of the lo- quite sure what they do.” cal appeal to alleviate it. Yes No Elections? “ at means that even when they accomplish amazing, excellent things, students just don’t hear about it.  e “I WISH CUSU WOULD lack of interest in the [sabbatical] po- Do you know the name of the current CUSU President? REACH OUT MORE ... sitions is symptomatic of that lack of engagement. CUSU is vital, students THEY’RE TOO DISTANT AND just don’t realise it.” Helen Hoogewerf-McComb, the sole Yes No NO-ONE’S QUITE SURE presidential candidate, said: “CUSU WHAT THEY DO” did a lot to publicise these elections… I honestly wish that CUSU President was contested. “CUSU needs to be better at engag-  e poll also uncovered that scepti- ing all students, but also at empower- cism is rife over CUSU’s 2013-14 budg- ing and inspiring new student leaders 26% es et, which forecasts an expenditure of so that they feel like they can stand for Y £674,000. 18 per cent of respondents sabbatical positions.” Don’t know the difference thought that the expenditure was not Rob Richardson, who is running W worth it, and three quarters of stu- uncontested for Education Offi cer, o between Is it h

dents did not think that they knew regretted the lack of nominations, but N worth spend- o

enough about CUSU to answer “yes” said that “running uncontested does

ing £660,000 k

or “no”. Only 7 per cent of respondents not really alter anything within the n

thought the money was being well campaign process.” on CUSU? o

spent. He believes that “engagement is w

s Max Odenghar, a third-year student a two-way aff air,” and that “the high and ? at Trinity College, was not surprised proportion of uncontested positions at the lack of student interest: “If they could be purely circumstantial.” [CUSU] spent time telling us what they  e main campaign hustings will do rather than just spending money, take place at 4pm on Saturday 1 March we’d all have a better idea of in the University Centre.

Department of Engineering extension to cost £13 million Tutor training campaign yields results Helen Amos University will now

News correspondent provide welfare training UCDMEDICINE Plans for a £13 million extension to the for all tutors University’s engineering department, which will see a fi ve storey addition to James Sutton the Baker Building in Fen Causeway, were approved last week. Deputy News Editor Planning permission was received to build on a portion of the Royal A centralised welfare training scheme Cambridge Hotel’s car park.  e for new college tutors is to be rolled out University stated that the extension by the University in the next academic will permit the development of re- year, it was announced this week.  is search projects, and resolve existing follows a CUSU campaign that high- problems caused by a lack of space. lighted the pitfalls and discrepancies “ e extension to the Department in the college welfare system. Minutes of Engineering is aimed at providing from the CUSU council meeting show more offi ce space, particularly for post- that CUSU’s Welfare and Rights Offi c- graduate students and post-docs,” said er, Helen Hoogewerf-McComb, called Professor Dame Ann Dowling, head of this news “a win.” the Department of Engineering. “ e Under the plans, new tutors will be new building will provide offi ce space invited to receive one day of training, for about 240 students and post-docs overseen by the University Counselling and about 20 academics and research Service.  ere will be contributions group administrators.” from the Disability Resource Centre, Students commented that they senior tutors, CUSU and the Graduate have not yet heard news from the de- Union. It is hoped that this will better partment about the extension. Lizzie prepare tutors for dealing with welfare O’Leary, a fi rst-year engineer, said: issues such as mental health, and pro- “£13 million seems huge but the whole vide a more “joined-up approach” to department is a little outdated, from welfare throughout the University. Hours spent in the library can often cause unhealthy stress levels a mix of oldish technology to the fact Currently, welfare training for tutors that the buildings themselves aren’t is optional and infrequent, and some was considered that a future expanded However, criticism of the plans is al- not resolve all the welfare problems that nice. Having said that, some of the tutors receive no training whatsoever, training session would be useful.” ready mounting, as the number of in- in Cambridge,” and pointed to the old pieces of equipment that are used despite often being the fi rst point of In response to the announcement coming tutors is small and the training “dire need for reform of intermission really don’t need to be replaced, either contact for students facing welfare of greater training for tutors, the men- will not be mandatory. and how colleges respond to rape and because they’ve stopped being made or problems. tal health campaign group, Student Chris Page, a former CUSU- sexual assault on campus.” because they function perfectly well.” A spokesperson for the University Minds Cambridge, announced that Graduate Union Welfare and Rights  is sentiment was echoed by She added: “However, in a fast grow- explained: “In the light of feedback they were “delighted” with the plans Offi cer and a mental health activist, Hoogewerf-McComb, who said in a ing industry like engineering, it’s al- from participants on previous [tutors’ for tutor training. “[We] are glad to called this “only a small step”, despite statement that “there is more work to ways important to have the most up- training] courses, and as part of our see the University working to improve applauding the progress made. be done to ensure that high quality, to-date facilities possible so in that ongoing eff orts to optimise welfare what could be a fantastic system,” a He argued that “we must also not consistent pastoral support is available respect I can’t see it as a bad thing.” provision in the collegiate university, it spokesperson said forget that tutor training alone will in all our college communities.” News COMMENT leave the premises by the end of June. Pembroke, St Catharine’s, Darwin and Queens’ colleges have proposed redeveloping the buildinginto bythe accommodation. redeveloping graduate leave the endofJune. premises have Pembroke, colleges proposed andQueens’ St Catharine’s, Darwin DEAD AS ADOJO AS DEAD training. training. need not do tutors their that view the take will colleges many sume as- unreasonable to be It not would tutors. existing for mandatory not is training the that is standing individuals. of under- handful Our mere a means which tutors, new at targeted be only will training ised improve. prom- automatically e will matters that assume or compla- cent, become not must dents development, stu- latest this with eff for its commended orts. it is glacial at CUSU best. should be and Cambridge, in change of the pace observing been have we new one, relatively a is campaign our inthis training. involved be will University Counselling Service year. academic of the new  e the before start training session tutors aone-day receive will new are sketchy, that butitwouldseem at this point Details tutor training. I Speaks ItsSpeaks Mind Cambridge first step, says but it only the is important, is Tutor training However, though we are pleased pleased are we However,though excellent step. an is is ough ing, CUSU has fi has CUSU ing, nally secured ofhard campaign- years after recently that, announced t was : Cambridge noodle bar Dojo is joining its feathered inthe namesake afterlife. its  joining is Dojo bar noodle Cambridge notifi been has students for 15years, serving been which has erestaurant, t ed

CAMBRIDGE SPEAKS ITS MIND from living in the city if they take take they if city the in living from students ban cannot it that cepted ago. years few a campaigning hard such of focus the was which process a mission, inter- with problems ongoing to the attention call to body student the urge problems would We Cambridge. at welfare numerous to remedy the important one just is recur.never will us that with shared have students responses times college horrifi at c, and saddening, the that sure making for strategy best the is this that belief its in unequivocal students. porting tutors with when faced sup- be will which issues of range vast the ers cov- and day one than longer lasts which programme, training tutor comprehensive a need we – tinues the con- that pressure is however, important, is What direction. right that this is merely a small step in the CUSU of appreciate to simply is It . COLLEGES WELFARE” ABOUT OF REFORM, QUESTIONING IN THISTHE PROCESS LEAD “STUDENTS MUST TAKE hl te nvriy hs ac- has University the While training tutor said, being  at is Mind Its Speaks Cambridge effthe belittle orts to not is is STUDENTWELFARE IN CAMBRIDGE simply leave itat that. University donot andcolleges to make sure the students need in the door, afoot is butweas able students to feel alone. it,”over get forcevulner-many can stressed, that“everyoneis ideology  often. too far issues dismiss or e other each normalise : port people for provision. better out strategies fl setting identifying and sup- aws, port, welfare about colleges their this process of reform, questioning bytheir colleges. failed being of indignity the endure also to had assault and have rape of periences ex-their shared have who students survivors. to support their power in everything do and assault, and harassment sexual to policies ance Cambridge. in toler- zero adopt to assault relatingneed frightening Colleges sexual testimonies to the of amount on comment deserve. they and allthe support respect, aff dignity, be orded must most vulnerable in Cambridge, and in- the among are reformed: students termitting be must It this. of evidence see to page Facebook our return to study their . in unaided going or forgotten, being then and intermit, to forced or pressured being dents stu- of testimonies countless have studies, still their we from break a In short, the new ‘tutor training’ ‘tutor the new training’ In short, At the same time, we need to sup- in lead the take must Students that unacceptable simply is It but help cannot we Similarly, at look to need only you Again, or email:[email protected] 60850or01223760850 form, call network: College. For fulldetails andanapplication accommodation, dinnerandbreakfast in and graduate students. plus £270perweek, challenging work for Cambridge undergraduate The offer International SummerSchools 1 July–16August 2014 this summer? forLooking work [email protected] Got anewsstory? Write tousat Friday 28th 2014 February o 7

DAISY SCHOFIELD 8 Friday 28th February 2014 News

Graduate Gamblers

Facing poor odds on the jobs market, Hannah Wilkinson meets the grads who have turned their gambling habits into careers

he days are getting longer, and the gaps between “And now this is what you do all day?” I ask. “Not all day. buses to get us there, but we could never get enough people worried emails from my dissertation supervi- I go out too,” he replies. “But this is what I want to be do- interested,” he says. sor are getting shorter. Exam term cometh. And ing in ten years time. There’s no job I can imagine myself with it, graduation. And with that, the real world, doing that would come close to this. My passion for this “I think for lots of people at Cambridge gambling is associ- Tfraught with unfortunate trappings like ‘having a job’ and outweighs anything else”. ated with murky working men’s clubs. And not many peo- ‘earning money’. ple from Cambridge have been to working men’s clubs. Or Unsure I could ever drum up such dedication to a website horse races”. Hoping to avoid starving artistically in the hedgerows, I containing so few pictures of cats, I call up Chris Humpleby. seek help from Ken Cheng. Ken is a stand-up comedian In his second year at Cambridge, Chris won £5,000 from Chris doesn’t deny that there is a ‘murky’ side. Betting, he and former Tab Columnist. And since he dropped out of an £8.50 stake he placed on a horse race. Since graduating, warns, can consume your life. “It’s a very insular world. his maths degree at St John’s, he’s been funding his BNOC Chris has managed to turn his passion for racing into a ca- People who gamble all the time struggle to hold down rela- lifestyle by playing professional poker. reer writing race previews for the Press Association. tionships and friendships, even if they’re doing well”. . Ken is mid-way through a game on the website Poker Stars Chris isn’t in it for the money. “Even if I could never bet Writing race previews, Chris is on “the right side of the when he lets me into his roomy flat in central Cambridge. on horse racing again I’d watch it just for the sport,” he en- fence” – advising the punters so they can win a few quid As he clicks away, cards and virtual money fly around a vir- thuses. “It’s so exciting when you link a human to an animal. against the bookies. But he worries that the decade he tual table. Racing is as much about understanding human beings as it hopes to spend in horse racing will one day prevent him is a sport: who trains the horse, who rides it, who owns it”. from pursuing a career as a teacher: “I’ve been told people might have a problem with it, morally and ethically”. Chris paints vivid pictures of “a constant cycle of making AS WE CHAT I NOTICE KEN’S WINNINGS HAVE history, drama, heroes and villains”. With hyped up horses But for now Ken and Chris seem more than happy to spend who might suddenly decide they don’t want to race that day, their post-Cambridge days with cards, or horses. With DROPPED BY $1,000. HE DOESN’T FLINCH. there are infinite variables at play at all times. thousands of pounds up for grabs, it’s nice work if you can bet it. “ONE DAY I LOST $100,000”, HE EXPLAINS. I, personally, have never trusted horses. They are difficult to reason with, and have large teeth. But Chris’s wwholesomeholesome betting beginnings, watching racing in his grandad’grandad’ss living HEAP DAN room in Carlisle, makes me forget my equine Thousands of virtual dollars are won and lost as Ken con- inhibitions. tinues clicking throughout our conversation. He assures me that people gamble with tens, sometimes hundreds of thou- “On Saturday afternoon when sands. “I’m not at that stage,” he says “It’s quite ridiculous”. there was the racing on telly he’d Ken first deposited on Poker Stars while he was still in sixth get us to pick horses and put on form, about seven years ago. He and a few friends played fake bets – just daft things like poker for fun, then made the transition to online gambling. that,” he tells me.

“I first deposited about $100 online. By the time I started “My grandad was a small stakes uni I’d made a few thousand. Since then it’s just been going punter. He wasn’t into reading form up. And now it’s quite high stakes. “I make easily enough to or anything. He had favourite jockies live on per month. Last month I made about £15,000. I’m in and trainers and put bets on them”. quite a good situation”. At Cambridge, where Chris read History As we chat I notice Ken’s winnings have dropped by $1,000. before switching to Education, he also He doesn’t flinch. “One day I lost $100,000”, he explains. had trouble fitting gambling around his academic work, and even more trouble Ken describes his year at Cambridge as a “hindrance” to his drumming up interest in the horse racing poker career. “I had to fit poker around my schedule and society. social stuff, and work, which I didn’t do much of”. Sitting through lectures, all Ken thought about was poker. “That’s “It was just me and a couple of lads and we one of the main reasons I dropped out, because I was think- went racing quite a lot. Newmarket offered ing a lot about poker but I didn’t get the chance to play it.” us free entry and they were going to lay on News Friday 28th February 2014 9 Hawking professorship gets the go-ahead Controversial and highly- paid Stephen Hawking professorship confi rmed E VAN DEN HEEVER MERÉSZ TALÁLMÁNYOK CAMBRIDGE SPY Zeyang Gao News Correspondent Rumour has it...

On Tuesday, the Stephen W. Hawking mbarrassment struck for professorship of cosmology was es- Eone member of a swap as tablished by the Regent House by 746 he already had a picture of the votes to 606. girl next to him printed on a e University will now accept a T-shirt, despite never having $6 million donation from the Avery- met her... Tsui Foundation, set up by Hawking’s late friend Dennis Avery, to fund the resher fever has struck for post. e donation allocates $2 mil- Ffour fellows at one college, lion for the “core endowment for the who have all been bedded by professorship”, while the remaining $4 the same student... million will be used to fund a salary of up to £140,000; double that of other hurchill Spring Ball wasn’t professors. Cthe classy aff air it claimed to e approval of the professorship is be, with human excrement being likely to stir debate, and the close vote found in all sorts of places... suggests that the issue has already di- vided opinion within the University’s professedly non-Labour governing body. Critics of the dona- Avoting student was guilt- tion have argued that the high salary Stephen Hawking’s professorship title has been highly controversial tripped into campaigning for is a threat to meritocracy. Others fear the party after coming face-to- that it will lead to donors increasing- infl uence include the renaming of of Cosmology which, thanks to the speculation was unconstrained by any face with the local candidate at a ly asserting their infl uence over pay New Hall to Murray Edwards College generous gift from the Avery-Tsui reliable observations. In those days we meeting... within the university. in 2008, following a £30 million dona- Foundation, will be duly created on 1 didn’t even know if the universe had a Adam Hill, a fi rst year MML stu- tion by alumna Ros Edwards and her March 2014 as a way of maintaining beginning, or if it had existed forever ne fresher’s search for dent, is concerned about the role: husband. Professor Hawking’s scholarly legacy.” in a steady state. Ospring romance may have “With the cache of Stephen Hawking’s e University issued the following In a statement released by the “ at we know more today is in a started her on a slippery slope. name attached to the professorship, statement: “ e University’s demo- Department of Applied Mathematics major part because of work done in this Perhaps love is the hardest drug there surely will be no need for this cratic process, through its self-gov- and eoretical Physics (DAMTP), department. It is therefore fi tting that of them all. exorbitant salary to attract academics erning body of academics, the Regent Professor Hawking said: “When I the Avery-Tsui foundation has given a to the role.” House, has approved the creation of joined DAMTP in 1962, cosmology generous donation, to establish a chair Miss V x Other recent examples of donor the Stephen W. Hawking Professorship was regarded as an area in which wild in cosmology in the department.” Can you do beter? Drink coffee Join our team for Easter and Michaelmas 2014 AND save the rainforest No experience is needed to get involved next term, and there’s never been a better time to join Varsity and try one of our positions. We use Fair Trade, Organic and For more information and to apply, email the editor, Rainforest Association certified Emily, [email protected]. coffee bean to make great coffee Formal applications are also invited to edit at Sam Smiley. and section edit Varsity in Michaelmas 2014 Not only is our coffee totally Application forms are available for download from ethical, we will also donate the varsity.co.uk/get-involved amount needed to protect 10 square feet of rainforest to Cool The deadline for editorial applications is Earth, for every cup of coffee sold. 5pm on Monday April 28 2014 The deadline for section editor applications is Endorsed by David Attenborough, 5pm on Monday June 2 2014 Cool Earth is a charity which works with local rainforest communities to protect All students are encouraged to apply. them from being cut down. No experience of Varsity is necessary. Check it out at www.coolearth.org If you have any questions, please email the current editor on [email protected]. VOUCHER Positions on the team include: Come to Sam Smiley at 68 Trumpington News Editor, Production Editor, Street, Cambridge CB5 8HS and use this Comment Editor, Features Editor, voucher to help yourself, and the world! Arts Editor, Reviews Editor, Corpus Christie Trumpington Street Sport Editor, Fashion Editor, College Sam Cappuccino Science Editor, Theatre Critic, Sam Smiley Smiley or Music Critic, Classical Critic, 68 Trumpington St Film Critic, Visual Arts Critic, Latte Literary Critic, Food Critic, Cambridge Photographer, Illustrator Silver Street just CB5 8HS Silver Street 95p PLUS a FREE Cake AND save 10 square feet of rainforest

Valid to: 31/03/2014 10 Friday 28th February 2014 News

NEWS IN BRIEF We need a new economics, says Ha-Joon Chang

Leading economist to burst. He said: “It is quite possible that DISCOTT worries another fi nancial some kind of fi nancial crisis hits some crash may be on horizon part of the world economy and we all get sucked into trouble again.” Questioning the possibility of ef- College fi nes revealed Louis Degenhardt fecting necessary change, Chang said Comment Editor that the prevailing consensus, which CAMBRIDGE An investigation car- sees the fi nancial sector as sacrosanct, ried out by e Tab has revealed Leading economist and Cambridge has taken such a hold on the British that from 2011 to 2013, 11 Cam- academic Ha-Joon Chang has issued a mindset that reform will be diffi cult bridge colleges fi ned their students renewed call for a fundamental change to aff ect. a total of £16,398. e highest-fi n- in the practice of economics. “[L]et’s hope that something hap- ing college, Emmanuel, was found Speaking in an interview with pens, because this hold of free mar- to have collected a total of £4,140 Varsity last week, Chang warned ket ideology, in this country at least, over this period from library fi nes that the disparity of knowledge be- that the fi nancial sector is paramount and late-paid college bills. tween specialists in the fi eld and and everything has to be sacrifi ced Downing College fi ned one stu- the general public has become worry- has such a hold on the British mind- dent £200 after an attempt to steal ingly large, and suggested that more set that it’s not going to be easy,” he candles from another college. e has to be done to address this. told Varsity. student was also compelled to write He also added that it was particu- letters of apology to the Master, larly important that “younger genera- Bursar and Head Porter. At Jesus, tions [are] beginning to question these a student was banned from college “IT IS QUITE POSSIBLE THAT things” and hopes that this will lead to premises for a year. something changing. SOME KIND OF FINANCIAL For Chang, economics is inherently CRISIS HITS AND WE ALL political, and he sees it as imperative that this is acknowledged and em- GET SUCKED INTO TROUBLE braced, instead of the “rather out- dated”, “nineteenth century” idea that AGAIN” economics is a science. “ at’s the huge achievement on the part of the professional economists, Cambridge trails Oxford because you have basically persuaded on global stage He dismissed the idea that econo- the people that this is so diffi cult that mists are “workers of some higher you cannot even have an opinion about CAMBRIDGE A QS study has ranked truth”, and labelled the increasingly it,” he said. Ha-Joon Chang calls for ‘common sense’ in economics Cambridge below Oxford on the inaccessible nature of economics as “We’ve got this profession wrong; a global stage. It looked at 800 uni- being “dangerous”. lot of professional economists think Chang worries that modern soci- praised the work of the Cambridge versities across the world, evaluat- Chang also warned of the likelihood what they do is too diffi cult for ordi- ety has carved out an essential part of Society for Economic Pluralism. ing them on their performances in of another fi nancial crisis if things do nary people. You’d be surprised how our life that is “totally insulated from He was also positive in his assess- 30 disciplines. not change. He denounced the harm often these people are stupid enough common sense, totally insulated from ment of the likelihood of reform, ar- Cambridge was considered done by the fi nancial sector as “scan- to say things...like ‘you wouldn’t un- democratic pressure, totally insulated guing that “cracks” are appearing, and the best place in the UK to study dalous”, and suggested that the current derstand what I do even if I explained from the deliberative process.” that once the assumption of rational- 14 subjects, while Oxford came growth of the British and American it to you’. If you cannot explain it to In his calls for reform, Chang em- ity is rejected, “the whole thing might top in 10. e London School of stock markets is a bubble likely other people, you have the problem.” phasised the importance of youth, and unravel”. Economics ranked fi rst in three, leaving Edinburgh, Reading and the Institute of Education to excel in one subject each. Marking boycott would put graduations at risk Worldwide, however, Oxford overtook; it was ranked the best place in the world to study English language and literature, modern Lecturers threaten to Cambridge Universities Labour Club, languages, and politics. said: “No one likes it when their course boycott marking exams BOYO OLLY is disrupted, but we must remember next term in pay dispute that the people who were the driving force behind our fee increases are the same who are now driving down pay of Richard Nicholl ordinary staff . News Correspondent

e pay dispute between the Universities and Colleges Union “IT MAY WELL AFFECT THE Funding for MPhils to (UCU) and an association of British AVAILABILITY OF RESULTS boost research higher education institutions shows no sign of abating as students face a FROM EXTERNAL MARKERS CAMBRIDGE A pilot scheme or- marking strike by lecturers from the ganised by colleges, the Isaac end of April. is has raising fears that AND EXAMINERS” Newton Trust and the Cambridge some graduations could be at risk. Home and EU Scholarship Scheme e ongoing and highly visible in- (CHESS) has unveiled plans for 70 dustrial action over a one per cent pay “Unifi ed and successful strike ac- postgraduate students to receive rise for university staff has reached tion undertaken by students and staff up to £12,000 each to support their heights described by Sally Hunt, will benefi t students too; in the future, research. General Secretary of UCU, as “the ul- sympathetic ears among the staff could is money will be available to timate sanction”. mean the diff erence between achiev- postgraduate students in any sub- In contrast to similar action in 2006, ing what is in the interest of students, ject, as long as they are members universities are likely to impose salary and being ignored entirely.” of the 19 colleges taking part in the deductions on striking staff , escalating Will queuing be worth the wait for this year’s finalists? A University spokesman said: “ is trial. It is hoped that these non-re- already-high tensions. is a national dispute and the University payable bursaries will cover living e Cambridge branch of UCU will Speaking to Varsity, Ronald Haynes, Cambridge students, emphasising that is represented through the new Joint costs for postgraduates. be participating in the marking boy- the president of Cambridge UCU, said: the eff ects would depend upon the Negotiating Committee for Higher e pilot scheme is set to run for cott if no deal is reached before the “Most of the staff who keep our uni- University’s response. Regardless of Education (JNCHES) framework, sup- 3 years. deadline. UCU members form part of versities running are having their pay the outcomes here, however, he noted ported by UCEA [the Universities and Professor Jon Parry, Director of the staff of most university faculties, cut. eir pay has fallen by 13 per cent that due to the national character of Colleges Employers Association] on the Isaac Newton Trust, explained and the impacts of the strike action in in real terms since 2009 and now staff the dispute “it may well aff ect the avail- behalf of university members. that “the Trust wanted to fi nd a way the past year or so has been felt across are angry because their employers ability of results from external markers “In such circumstances it would to support more students in this most disciplines. have been refusing to off er any more and examiners”. be inappropriate for the university to crucial fi rst year of graduate study” However, unions taking part in pre- than 1 per cent for the year.” Previous strikes have received sup- comment at this stage. We are moni- as funding becomes increasingly vious walkout action, including Unite Haynes added that it would be port from CUSU as well as Cambridge toring the situation and awaiting fur- diffi cult to fi nd. and UNISON, will not be taking part very diffi cult at this stage to know Defend Education. Tom Wilson, ther information to be released by the in the marking boycott exactly what the impact would be on a member of the Executive of the trade unions or by UCEA”. News Friday 28th February 2014 11

NEWS IN BRIEF LUCY LU WILSON

Big Bang Theory ‘friend equation’ for academics CAMBRIDGE Researchers at the university’s Department of Genet- ics have developed an algorithm for matchmaking academics at confer- ences. e algorithm has been lik- ened to Sheldon Cooper’s ‘friend equation’ from the American sit- com e Big Bang eory. Dr Rafael Carazo-Salas realised that academics are fed up with speed-dating style events at confer- ences which result in “like sticking with like”. He developed the algorithm to “enable new links to be made” be- tween researchers, trialling it suc- cessfully on 40 volunteers.

Cambridge academic wins prize for reducing animals in research CAMBRIDGE Dr. Meritxell Huch TAKING TO THE STREETS: An estimated 135 Cambridge women took part in a Reclaim the Night protest against sexual violence last week. has been awarded a prize from the Lauren Steele, CUSU Women’s Offi cer, told the crowd: “Sexual violence has to stop…We demand to use public space without fear”. National Centre for the Replace- ment, Refi nement and Reduction of Animals in research. Dr. Huch has developed a meth- Israel Apartheid Week causes controversy od which can be used to grow fully- functional liver tissue from adult mouse stem cells. anks to this method, cells from a single mouse Week-long awareness could be used to create enough tis- sue to test 1000 drug compounds, campaign branded a a process which would have previ- ‘smear’ by student ously required 50,000 mice. Biologists have attempted to grow Helen Amos liver cells for some time, but until now no laboratory had successfully

News Correspondent ANA NOGUIERA AND ERON DAVIDSON done so. Dr. Huch is also testing the meth- Cambridge’s Israel Apartheid Week od on human cells. It is possible that (IAW), an awareness campaign this will allow a patient’s own tissue launched on Monday by the Cam- to be grown and used if they require bridge University Palestine Society, a transplant. has reignited the ongoing student de- bate about the Israel-Palestine issue. Yacoub Kureh, a post-graduate stu- dent at Emmanuel and one of the or- ganisers of IAW, said that he hoped that the campaign would educate students about “decades of institu- tionalised racism, occupation, dis- crimination, ethnic cleansing [and] di- aspora,” and about “the global Boycott, Stag attack victim feels Divestment and Sanctions [BDS] cam- A still from Roadmap to Apartheid, which was screened on Tuesday “lucky to be alive” paign and other nonviolent grassroots CAMBRIDGE Dr Kate Stone, a movements that aim to dismantle this solution in the Israel-Palestine region, e IAW talks and exhibitions debate with Israelis,” said Galloway. former researcher at the universi- policy of injustice.” expressed concerns that IAW is not “in aim to “raise awareness of Israel as Cambridge Univeristy Jewish ty’s Institute for Manufacturing, has However, Eylon Aslan-Levy, an the spirit of constructive dialogue” and an apartheid state.” Events included Society does not take a political stance said she feels “ lucky to be alive” af- MPhil student at Girton and blogger said that the use of the word apartheid a screening of the 2012 documentary on the issue. “ e Society provides so- ter she was gored in the throat by a for the Times of Israel, has blasted the “does not refl ect the complexity of the Roadmap to Apartheid and a panel cial, cultural and educational events stag in Scotland over the New Year. campaign. “IAW is a nasty smear cam- situation and is misleading”. discussion entitled: “Separate But Not for Jewish and non-Jewish students She is recovering at her sister’s paign designed to demonise the Jewish “Sadly, IAW is focused on pushing Equal: Palestinian Refugees’ Right alike and is proud to welcome all stu- home in Dundee, but aims to return state. It seeks to use an emotive label a one-sided narrative, which makes it of Return”. dents no matter what their religious or to Cambridge to run her high-tech to obliterate all nuances and deliber- harder for those of us working on cre- e status of the Israel-Palestine de- political beliefs may be,” said President printing fi rm. She has spoken about ately distort the facts,” he said. ating real dialogue.” bate in Cambridge was highlighted last Hilary Davidson. her feelings about her injuries: “I’m In response to Aslan-Levy’s criti- However, Paul Rubenstein, a fourth- year when Professor Stephen Hawking IAW was established in Toronto in told it stopped just a few millime- cisms, Kureh said: “It’s in fact ironic year computational biology student at withdrew from Israel’s Presidential 2005 and has evolved into an annual tres from my spinal cord. I’m also to hear Aslan-Levy accuse IAW of us- Emmanuel, has defended IAW. “ ere Conference at the request of pro-Pal- series of lectures and rallies in 55 coun- told that if it had been slightly to the ing emotive labels. When he says ‘de- [has been] no hint of anti-semitism, estinian activists, in a move that was tries. Its mission statement says: “IAW left of the right I would have bled to monise the Jewish state’ what he re- nor [a] dismissal of the concerns of interpreted as support for BDS. has played an important role in raising death at the scene.” ally wants you to hear is ‘demonise the Israelis living in the region today,” he Respect MP George Galloway last awareness and disseminating informa- She called the realisation that Jewish.’ We are not trying to obliterate said of one of the week’s events. year notoriously walked out on a de- tion about Zionism, the Palestinian her injuries were life-threatening nuance nor distort facts – Israel’s poli- He argues that rather than attack- bate at the Oxford Union after learning liberation struggle and its similarities “strange”, and added that she had cies are apartheid, by defi nition.” ing Israel, IAW is “a call to end poli- that his opponent, Aslan-Levy, then an with the indigenous sovereignty strug- envisaged dying in a car crash, but Joel Fenster, a third-year student at cies and practices that have made lives undergraduate, was an Israeli citizen. gle in North America and the South now feels that “a stag accident is Selwyn who campaigns for a two-state miserable for decades.” “I don’t recognise Israel and I don’t African anti-apartheid movement.” much more my style.” 12 Friday 28th February 2014 News The Interview: Poppy Noor

THE BENEFITS OF BENEFITS SURAJ MAKWANA Amy Hawkins talks to Poppy Noor about teenage homelessness, Trinity College, and thinking differently about the welfare state eople always talk about peo- [about] whether or not people had Sky Noor and her friends from the hostels she having somewhere to go when you come which is a real thing, and is a really important ple from state schools that boxes. I just thought that it was so stupid spent her final teenage years in faced when it back. thing. “P go to Cambridge, but, be- that that was what people were talking about came to applying to university. Low expecta- “I mean, in the end, after I went to visit “But people seem to think that the fact ing homeless and going to Cambridge instead of how much [welfare] costs, or how tions are part of the problem, she says, argu- Trinity, I just thought I’d be really stupid that we have…a system of benefits that traps made me feel quite like a fish out of many people are on benefits, or what their ing that the government should be “celebrat- if I decided not to go, but I don’t know if I people means that we should cut benefits. water.” Indeed. ultimate plan is.” ing and supporting and encouraging people would’ve gone if I’d got in somewhere else.” Which is not true. We have a system of ben- On paper, Poppy Noor’s story is extraor- “I feel like there needs to be a concrete def- from hostels who get into university or want She worries that the rarity of cases like efits that traps people because jobs don’t pay dinary. With a difficult family background, inition of where we’re going, because that’s to go to university”. hers means that there is a lack of pressure to enough, because we subsidise businesses by her domestic situation eventually escalated when you get an idea of what people actually improve the support available. A rebuttal she not paying enough, rents are massively high, to the stage where it was no longer safe for believe in. often faced while lobbying was, she tells me, there’s inflation and wages aren’t going up. her to stay at home. At the age of 16, Noor “If people think that we’re going towards “Oh, well you know there aren’t really people She continues: “I’m not sure whether I be- was on the streets. having no welfare state, they’d probably feel “IF YOU’RE LUCKY YOU’LL in your situation, it’s a rare situation.” lieve in [the idea] that getting rid of the thing “I’m keen not to make it a sob story,” she differently about cuts than if they think we’re GET A JOB AT SAINSBURY’S, Suffice to say life at Cambridge hardly that means that you have something to live tells me in our email exchange before our in- just trying to make work pay or if we’re just amounts to a typical student experience, but on when you’re unwell, or out of work, or terview. And in fact, looking at her now, there trying to help people get jobs, or whatever.” AND IF YOU’RE NOT LUCKY government and university grants made sure you’ve lost your job, is a way to deal with the doesn’t seem much to sob about. Despite her Noor also sees a problem in apathy of the that Noor was able to at least enjoy largely fact that people don’t have money to live.” precarious home situation, Noor managed young people, largely thanks to a feeling of YOU’LL GET HIV” the same lifestyle as her peers. However, with regards to the increas- to get a place to read PPS at Trinity College, powerlessness: “People in my position don’t As well as accommodating her in the holi- ingly successful Cambridge Living Wage matriculating in 2009. really end up interested in politics very often, days, Trinity ensured that the smaller aspects campaign, with King’s College becoming the She is part of the six per cent of young and I don’t think they often end up having Council workers, although there to help, of student life were covered as well. She sug- latest college to commit to paying the living people in care who make it to university. She the tools to be able to argue their case, I feel aren’t always particularly encouraging. “I just gests that the college was “so nervous that I wage to all its staff, Noor is wary of overly now works in local government in London, like they’re often ignored”. think the assumption is always there, that if would ever feel left out because of money, simplifying the matter. “I feel like it’s not but has recently been thrown into the spot- Certainly, Noor is not one to be ignored, you’re lucky you’ll get a job at Sainsbury’s, and that if anything probably went the opposite an isolated thing,” she tells me. “What’s the light, and has appeared on Channel 4 News not to accept powerlessness. This is not the if you’re not lucky you’ll get HIV, so someone way”, and notes that her tutors would pay for point in paying two pounds extra an hour in flooring the Conservative MP Nigel Mills in first time she has spoken out on behalf of better tell you to use a condom.” dental appointments, prescriptions – “they a climate where people can’t afford to rent a a debate about benefits. Noor was invited her often seemingly voiceless generation. By this measure, Noor was more than paid for me to do everything.” Noor adds place? I don’t think that colleges paying the onto the show after she wrote a column for While at Cambridge, she vigourously lob- lucky. However, to attribute her success to that if she were at another university, she living wage is going to deal with the fact that the Guardian in which she blasts the gov- bied – much to her tutor’s concern about her mere luck would belittle her tangible hard probably wouldn’t have been able to do lots we’ve massively subsidised businesses in our ernment’s planned cuts to benefits for the studies – for the government to change their work, and the help she received along the of the things other students did. fucking welfare budget.” under-25s, benefits that Poppy depended on policy on youth homelessness. As it stood, way. She realises that she is an exceptional Now, free from a critical dependency on Poppy Noor is a remarkable character, to during her sixth form years. if, while being housed by the council you case, and that Cambridge made the differ- government support, Noor is able to express say the least. While she was once a home- “I was just annoyed,” Noor says, “I was lis- moved out of your borough, for example to ence. “Even for me, it was a big decision to a more philosophical attitude to benefits. In less sixteen-year-old fish out of water, she tening to [people on the radio] argue about go to university, you would be made home- go to university,” she admits, “because you’re particular, she is wary of the rhetoric that is now making waves out in the real world. Benefits Street and the like, and I just felt re- less again. giving up all of your security when you come dominates public debate: “I think that a lot of However, do not forget that she is a triumph ally angry that this was the level of debate, This is just one of the many deterrents that back, and it’s really scary, the idea of not the time, people talk about the benefits trap, of the welfare state: dismantle it at your peril. Science Friday 28th February 2014 13 DAVID FOLTZ DAVID

Sex on the Brain Varsity Science talks bridge’s Department of Psychiatry, correlation in this study between dif- collated data from 126 studies, encom- ferences in the size of brain regions and to the team examining passing many thousands of brains. specifi c neurological and psychiatric One notable fi nding was that al- conditions associated with those con- whether size matters though men on average have a larger brain volume than women, by a mar- Robert Cronshaw & Amy gin of up to 13 per cent, they do not “THE OVERLAP BETWEEN Hawkins tend to perform better than women in ANIMAL intelligence tests. SEX AND BRAIN Science Correspondents “It is important to note that we only of the investigated sex diff erences in brain DIFFERENCES CAN NO New research has found that there structure,” said Ruigrok, a PhD can- are a number of diff erences between didate. “Integrating across diff erent LONGER BE IGNORED” the brains of men and women, both in levels will be an important goal for terms of size and composition. future research.” WEEK Amber Ruigrok, lead researcher, “[Amber] makes it clear that this is along with John Suckling and Simon purely at the structural level, and that ditions, this evidence is not suffi cient Baron-Cohen, professors from Cam- from this we cannot infer anything to draw any kind of conclusion. about function, cognition or behav- However, it does provide a use- TOP 5 SCIENCE STORIES iour,” said Professor Baron-Cohen, a ful signpost for future research, renowned autism expert and author potentially through investigat- of the controversial book  e Essential ing sex-specifi c developmen- e spotted salamander 1. Cannabis could be deadly Diff erence. tal processes in the brain and is the fi rst and so far even when not mixed with  e analysis also found that men whether these diff erences are only vertebrate shown other drugs, scientists claim. tend to have a larger and denser hip- related to skewed sex ratios of mental pocampus, the part of the brain that health problems. to use photosynthe- is damaged in people who suff er from It has already been shown that the sis. Its eggs absorb 2. Researchers have found that depression. Studies have shown that manifestation of autism in adults is algae from the sur- while women are twice as likely to be sex-dependent, with men tending to a previously unidentifi ed female rounding water, al- mummy was killed in a South diagnosed with the illness than men, display more autistic characteristics prevalence is in fact equally likely be- than women. It is highly possible that lowing the grow- American ritual sacrifi ce. tween the sexes. other neuro-psychological conditions  e overlap between sex and brain have sex dependent pathologies, ing salamanders to 3. French researchers have diff erences “known to be implicated in with diff erent changes occurring in take a leaf out of the found that brain blood-fl ow is psychiatric conditions”, can no longer the male and female brain. book of plants and be ignored, Ruigrok tells me. Future If so, it may be that future treat- key to remembering dreams. research should “test whether sex dif- ments are tailored to an individual’s produce their own ferences in brain structure underlie sex to allow for these diff erences. For food using energy 4. Harvard scientists have skewed sex ratios of neurological and this to happen neuroscience research- from sunlight. produced a new method for 3D psychiatric conditions. ers will have to be more mindful than “It is very important to examine ever before of the sex and gender of printing of biological tissue. males and females independently to their research subjects. investigate if the same brain areas are However more research into the 5. Cambridge scientists have implicated in the same psychiatric aff ect of sex on brain function is still discovered the secrets of stick conditions for each sex, or if this dif- needed. According to Professor Baron- fers dependent on sex.” Cohen, “Such infl uences need to be insects’ sticky feet. In other words, although there is a teased out, one by one.” 14CommentFriday 28th February 2014 Comment Sight loss needn’t mean defeat

hanks to clumsy wording – try to learn your own way between sharing common nationalities, values, best tackle the medical consequences ‘blindness’, ‘visual impairment’ lectures, essay deadlines, and rowing and interests. Developing these ideas or economic problems experienced by T – when we hear of sight loss outings, or, indeed, to gently coerce an to further and more powerful insights those with a visual impairment, often we think by default in terms of defi - organiser to walk there and back with comes easily with a wild imagination, without considering the importance ciency, a person manqué, drastically you. Finding the fi rst and last options especially that stretched from years of of reforming attitudes towards such Harshadha diff erent from fellow humans who are rather uncomfortable, and the second addressing questions from the brain disabilities and appreciating the in- apparently whole. occasionally unfeasible, I decided that the eyes cannot answer. numerable contributions of those Balasubramanian Such terminology obscures the fact instead to organise my own events  e paralympic sport Goalball aff ected. that sight loss can also be an excel- and assist in starting up non-profi t demonstrates the creativity of people In Cambridge, I witness such lent opportunity for the individual endeavours, gladly helping myself to aff ected by sight loss, determined not small changes occurring as those Arriving at and their surroundings to undergo some leadership and event manage- to be inhibited by prevailing cultural going about their daily routine on a some positive changes. As one who ment skills at the same time. Sight loss attitudes. It consists of blindfolded busy bridge pause to make way or Cambridge with a fully satisfi es all of the above condi- does not have to mean defeat. players aiming to score goals with move obstacles as I approach.  ey tions, a few weeks living and studying Similarly, the detrimental impact of a ball that contains bells for sound consciously recognise the diffi culties visual impairment in Cambridge was enough for me to sight loss can often result in the sharp- recognition.  is venture has put of the environment, and take respon- presents challenges, acknowledge this truth. ening and growing appreciation of Cambridge on the Goalball map; two sibility to rebuild it for others. Such On an individual level, sight loss other senses, especially as you dodge of the city’s players currently compete considerations improve all pedestrian but throws up may threaten to confi ne you in social between Cambridge’s spellbound on the British team and are potential journeys, regardless of sight loss. and intellectual darkness, but can also tourists and its equally stubborn and Rio 2016 paralympians.  ey also make other people aware opportunities as well. fl ing the doors open to fresh light. obstructive trees on Sidgwick Avenue. My dedication to rowing encour- that their surroundings are not in any Problem-solving skills, wild imagina- Doing all of this and still arriving at aged Selwyn College Boat Club to go sense fi nished or complete; they don’t tion, and confi dence can actually be 9am lectures is bound to boost any out of their way to make me feel at have to stay exactly as they are, and built on the loss of sight. But how? individual’s confi dence. home in a boat. From simple things can be remade to the benefi t of all  ink of your fi rst Michaelmas Sight loss has also proven an op- like attaching a straw to blades for through the smallest of actions and term! After having spent hours listen- portunity to come upon original tactile marking, to planning in numer- considerations. ing to a screen-reading software mo- interpretations in academia. As a ous individual training sessions, to We must continue to search be- notonously announcing the glory of student of Social Anthropology, it’s providing focused technical coaching, yond the negativity generated by the each event and society, you eventually perhaps only normal, albeit impracti- they have taken the leap, paving the rhetoric of “lacking” to become more admit you can’t attend most of them. cal, that I watch ethnographic fi lm. way towards more accessible rowing aware of the abundance of brilliant  ey are located in vague corners of  e absence of vision here has enabled at Cambridge. opportunities ignited by sight loss, Cambridge you have not yet ventured me to grasp that understanding the Sight loss awakes us to the fact of which this article is indeed one. to, and you can feel them mockingly “other” in Social Anthropology can that our built environments only suit Undoubtedly, there is still much that glaring out of a Google Map you can- frequently shed light on one’s own cul- certain needs and not others, of which the individual and our surroundings not read. tural reality, specifi cally the fact that those resulting from sight loss are only have to undertake, but my experiences It is often possible, as I do, to drag we all have vastly contrasting ways a small proportion. Most government suggest that both can gain as much as reluctant friends along, to desperately of perceiving the world, even while policies seek to understand how to they lose from visual impairment. Job snobbery: a new pandemic

ews just in: a terrifying scavenge from abandoned Gardies competitively-paid position at a lowly that one of the main reasons young new epidemic is spreading boxes than work in a high-up man- energy company: “When my friends people go to university was ‘to make N through Cambridge and agement position at McDonald’s,” talk about how they aren’t earning myself attractive to prospective other universities across the country. said one interviewee. “At least that any money, I feel left out. A lot of the employers’, closely followed by ‘to  e situation is progressing at such way I could live with some dignity.” time, I think it would be better to be get away from my annoying younger alarming speed that reports suggest “I want a job where I can use my massively in debt and chase a big- brother’, and ‘to feel dead brainy’. Harriet Cartledge that the threat is in fact close to being Master’s degree in Classics,” said an- name company than to earn a living Combined with the expanding cost upgraded to pandemic status. other, “and I’m not willing to compro- at a decent if less prestigious fi rm.” of higher education, it seems that It seems that many intelligent mise simply because I can get all the Lizzie Brown added: “It seems if seeing university as a path to more Get-a-Job disease Cambridge students have been benefi ts of a high-profi le company at you don’t work at a Goldman Sachs highly-skilled jobs is the key to why infected by the dreaded ‘ergophilis a lesser-known fi rm, even if it does or a McKinsey type fi rm, then you young graduates have been holding is sweeping the digestivum’ virus, commonly known have more potential for long term really are missing out on…something. out for some kind of return on their as ‘Get-A-Job’ disease.  e disease growth and promotion prospects.” I feel really ashamed to be earning an investment: usually in the form of a country, and we’re all seems to infect those in their fi nal 100 percent of our interviewees honest living at a solid company that job that they couldn’t have got had year of study in particular – some- complain of general feeling of hope- provides many with valuable services they left school after completing struggling to fi ght it. thing about the gaping void of an un- lessness about the future, and ru- and resources.” Pokémon Sapphire. planned future seems to make these mours of a graduate position at Aldi Despite its devastating eff ects, Nevertheless, the fi nancial crisis, students, for some unknown reason, with a £40,000 starting salary have some are saying that the contagious the rising levels of tuition debts and especially susceptible to the virus. only fuelled complaints that there spread of ‘ergophilis digestivum’ may the subsequent need to pay them off  is horrifying parasite compels its are no good jobs any more. Current be a good thing, forcing those who can only account for so much. human hosts to accept jobs at fi rms advice is for students to put off refuse to work to enter the jobs mar- “Too many whingers, that’s the Have that their parents haven’t heard of or graduation at all costs, and instead to ket, which has famously been doing problem. Not the ‘economy’, what- in sectors that are a bit ‘iff y’, leaving discover a never-before-manifest love great the past few years. ever hocus-pocus that is,” said one any views them hideously disfi gured by allevi- for Management Studies. Ill-advised “My kids are lazy and do nothing high-level government offi cial who on this week’s ated student loans and friends from postgraduate programmes and trips all day except watch Take Me Out – a graduated in a jobs boom and rolled outside the Oxbridge bubble. to Africa to ‘fi nd oneself’ also exhibit good dose of ergophilis would be just into a law fi rm with a  ird. comment pieces? We spoke to three Cambridge similar levels of effi cacy. what they need,” said mum-of-two “If you won’t get a minimum-wage Tweet us @VarsityUK, students who refl ect the majority of And those who accept places in Barbara, as she attempted to spatula job cleaning up coff ee-fl avour baby- views across the university. Many of professions that are beneath them her daughter off the sofa. “I just don’t sick in Nero’s just because you feel or write in to their friends have been stricken by often fi nd themselves paying for understand: they’ve never had to that, as a graduate who’s spent a great letters@varsity. the illness, going to work at sewage their decision in other ways too. work for anything their entire lives so deal on their education, you should companies and lesser-known ac- One recent graduate, who wishes why would they expect to not have to be working in a graduate job, then co.uk countancy fi rms. to remain unnamed, has said that work for things now?” you are a job snob – no two ways “I’d rather live in a bin and she feels alienated since accepting a However, recent polls suggest about it.’ Comment Friday 28th February 2014 15

e great Teach First debate

new Teach First recruits. e show is have achieved at least a 2:1 in their results? Who can give you the chance FOR fi rsthand evidence that the graduates- degrees, to good use in changing the to make a diff erence after only six turned-teachers don’t need more than education system. Few would disagree weeks of training? When it comes o other graduate scheme in two years to make a positive impact with the long-term benefi ts the pro- to leadership opportunities and the e Times’ top 100 is criti- – they need a few weeks. Teach First gramme off ers. chance to work for a scheme that is N cised quite like Teach First. may not encourage a long career in So students who fi ve years ago still rapidly expanding and has huge Currently the top graduate recruiter teaching but it encourages something would have walked into Deloitte, PwC potential, no other graduate scheme in the UK, it seems like a mere vehicle far more important: a career that can or the Civil Service are now changing can match Teach First. for Russell Group graduates wanting a make a diff erence. the face of education. What’s in it for People have diff erent reasons for shortcut into an easy career. In reality, the diff erence that Teach the graduates who essentially sacrifi ce going into Teach First. For some, it’s a Of all the assumptions, the saying First teachers make may not necessar- just under half their potential salary in means of entering their dream career ‘Teach First, then get a better job,’ gets ily occur in the teaching profession. order to work the same hours, with far without having to spend more time Morwenna Jones thrown around the most. But those Indeed, the second part of the saying, less material compensation? in education getting a PGCE. For who use it miss the point. In a recent ‘then get a better job,’ is heavily ironic In the fi rst place, there’s the intrin- others, it’s a way to give something interview, James Westhead, Teach as 70 per cent of recruits go on to have sic reward derived from teaching and back. For others still, it’s the company First’s Director of External Relations, careers in education. Accordingly, the satisfaction of making a diff erence that trained the teacher who helped said that “schools need high-quality to complain about Teach First being to the lives of struggling students. But them pass their GCSEs. Teach First teachers in order to succeed and that’s used as a stepladder for power-hungry even more so, what other graduate off ers everybody something, and to what Teach First is all about.” is graduates is to complain about Teach scheme is going to give you complete condemn it is to condemn the most is evident in BBC3’s Tough Young First putting the brains of those authority? Where else are you going powerful instrument for educational Teachers, a series that follows six power-hungry graduates, all of whom to have total responsibility for your change we’ve seen this century.

For many, the programme is more which lets non-law graduates practise graduate teacher. In Tough Young AGAINST of a ‘gap year job’ rather than the fi rst law, while the Teach First graduates Teachers, Science teacher Claudenia step in a teaching career. e pro- get a paltry six weeks’ training. is actually fell asleep during one of her e probably all had an inspi- gramme lasts two years, after which a means that the Teach First teachers classes as she had been up all night rational teacher at school large number of the teachers move on are unlikely to be outstanding teachers planning lessons. W who encouraged us to aim to other professions. For them, Teach in their fi rst two years, even if they Admittedly, this kind of pressure for A*s and to apply to Cambridge. First is a chance to give something have the potential to be if they pur- and stress is to be found in other is breed of life-changing teachers is back to those in need. e recent sued a career as a teacher. graduate jobs, but they tend to be a lot what Teach First is trying to cultivate BBC3 series Tough Young Teachers Moreover, this lack of prepara- better remunerated: even Gove’s new in targeting people who succeeded featured a number of graduates from tion makes the job of the Teach First pay scheme won’t see a new teacher academically at school and beyond. privileged, privately-educated back- graduate incredibly challenging. on a salary anything like a peer’s pay Indeed, fewer than one in fi ve Teach grounds who stated that they wanted Unrealistic workloads, all-nighters package in the City. And it is this kind Will Amor First graduates didn’t go to a Russell to help those less fortunate than them. and a diet of caff eine may be familiar of fi nancial comparison that really Group institution. A commendable ambition this may to Cantabs, but at least as students makes Teach First unworkable. Even However, more than half of these be, but being a teacher as a charitable we don’t have to put up with mouthy graduate civil servants, with the ben- graduates leave the teaching profes- pit-stop before another career is likely teens, nor are we responsible for the efi t of swanky Whitehall offi ces and sion within fi ve years: a much larger to do more damage than good. Most education of hundreds of students. no boisterous kids, earn more than proportion than those who joined teachers will have had to study for the Despite six weeks’ holiday in sum- graduate teachers. teaching via other routes. So why year-long Postgraduate Certifi cate of mer, term time is a veritable night- More should be done to get the best can’t Teach First keep these graduates Education, the professional equiva- mare for any teacher, and especially people into teaching, but not in the teaching? lent of the Graduate Diploma of Law, an inexperienced, under-qualifi ed form of Teach First. 16 Friday 28th February 2014 Comment Voices from the Syrian front

espite being on my year A friend of mine has told me many denounced the BBC or Fox News for abroad in Jordan, I know only times about close Alawite friends of its lies or misreporting on a given D a handful of Jordanians. is his from home, many of whom were incident. At the same time, there is is largely because, through a series of active in the opposition before the a powerful rumour-mill. Friends of choices, half-coincidences, and lucky revolution. He also regularly men- mine (who work with many other chances, I have ended up ensconcing tions Christian friends of his family. Syrians) heard from their friends A View from myself in the Syrian community here Even those people who are quick there that there was soon to be an in the city of Amman – a community to describe the Alawite faith and election announced – the election the Bridge made up, for the most part, of refu- Shi’i Islam as ‘not real religions’ (in never materialised. gees (offi cially registered or other- contrast to Christianity, Judaism and Also surprising is that attitudes to- wise) fl eeing the awful humanitarian Sunni Islam) tend to stress that this wards Islamist groups are mixed and Alice Udale-Smith situation in their country. is nevertheless none of their busi- ambiguous. Although people usually Chris Hitchcock I’ve made a lot of friends here, had ness. Any sectarianism now present leap to condemn al-Qaeda, it doesn’t Congratulations, you’ve made it to a lot of fun, and acquired plenty of is attributed, generally, to the regime’s necessarily follow that their poli- the end of Lent! Except, of course, anecdotes completely unrelated to tactic of ‘divide and conquer’. tics will be anti-Islamist. My friend in the calendar sense, in which case e Syrian confl ict the ongoing revolution, but inevitably People were and remain generally regularly argues for the restoration of Lent doesn’t start for another week. discussion often turns to politics, and supportive of Western intervention, the Caliphate (an Islamic state) in our But it’s not just students who will has now dominated what Syrians have to say about the although they tend to emphasise the conversations, while also referring to be celebrating the Easter break: crisis is often not what you’d expect. diff erence between a “new colonial- the common tropes of liberal democ- one taxi driver has complained to headlines for over It would be silly to claim that the ism” and a humanitarian interven- racy – the nation-state, fair and free Cambridge News that he has been people I’ve spoken to here are uni- tion. People have asked me exasperat- elections, and so on. having increasing problems with three years. Here, versally representative: they’re almost edly why the British parliament voted ese ideas, for many, are in no drunk ARU students throwing up a year-abroad all active or semi-active members against intervening in Syria, with way contradictory. As for the al- in his cab, refusing to pay and even of the opposition, with well-formed their own conclusions generally being Nusra Front (a branch of al-Qaeda), threatening to beat him up – lead- student refl ects on political views and a strong desire either callousness or stupidity. most people I have spoken to – in- ing him to contact the police. to talk about them and to ask their It’s also striking that individuals cluding some whose political orienta- Bad behaviour isn’t just con- the surprising views own questions of me. I obviously often are very curious to know (and, tions you could defi nitely describe fi ned to the young. is week a can’t present every single story or if necessary, discredit) the Western as Islamist – resent the idea that the Cambridgshire county council- of refugees who opinion I’ve heard – but I’d like to view of the confl ict, and also of Islam Front wants to assert its own idea of lor and his wife pleaded guilty to have escaped to try and bring out some of the com- and Arabs in general. I still haven’t Islam. One of my friends asked me, £25,000 worth of benefi t fraud, mon threads that have emerged in come up with a pithy answer for rhetorically, “Do they know better after lying about where they lived neighbouring Jordan. conversation. “What is your opinion of Muslims?” than me what Islam is?” to claim income support. e People regularly stress that there is despite having been asked over fi fty ese are, of course, just some of councillor was suspended from no sectarian element to the confl ict in times, and I have no idea how I am the many issues and points of dispute UKIP following the charges last Syria, or rather, there are no underly- supposed to respond to “What are surrounding the Syrian revolution, a month. He must have realised then ing sectarian tensions. Often people the main fl aws of the Arabs, in your confl ict which remains both com- that things were really going badly elaborate on this by explaining that opinion?” More generally, people plicated and obfuscated by a lack if his party considered him more while sectarian elements have come are usually convinced that Western of clear data and the preference of off ensive than Godfrey Bloom. to the fore – and that the Alawites media is exaggeratedly pro-Israel and media for a compelling, cohesive In breaking news elsewhere, in particular, the religious group anti-Arab. narrative. We must not allow these it was revealed that being self- President Assad’s family are from, People in general are perhaps narratives to drown out the voices of deprecating in order to get people have attached themselves solidly to understandably given to mistrusting individual Syrians, who are, after all, to like you actually works. is the regime – these problems were not the media; several Syrians who follow those who hold the highest stake in week Russia poked fun at its own present before the revolution. Western newspapers have angrily the future of their country. technical problems in the Olympic opening ceremony by recreating the now infamous failure of the fi fth Olympic ring to light up, this time with people. e rest of the world reacted with surprise, mostly Stating the Bloom-ing obvious because until then we’d all assumed Russians lacked a sense of humour, before immediately deciding that Russia perhaps wasn’t so bad after here has been some com- immigration and gay marriage, in re- Newsnight. Along with Mr Bloom all (as long as we all conveniently ment on my decision to invite sponse to which he indicated his con- this term we have hosted Members forgot the whole LGBT+ issue and T Godfrey Bloom, the previ- cerns on both topics arose not from of Parliament Jacob Rees-Mogg massive corruption). ously UKIP MEP, as a speaker at a bigotry but in the former case from and Chloe Smith, both fascinat- I would like to propose that, Cambridge University Conservative economic arguments, and in the case ing speakers with perspectives that purely for research purposes, we all Association event earlier this of gay marriage a fear of inadequate cannot in anyway be described as start making each essay worse than term. Several of these negative protection for religious dissenters dull. In the past we have welcomed the previous one in order to see remarks have sought to criticise the against European courts. After the Norman Tebbit, Nigel Farage, and whether this makes our supervisors Association for welcoming a speaker event was fi nished he was also happy Roger Scruton, along with many like us more. Just please don’t tell they described as “sexist, homopho- to carry on discussion and debate other speakers who have challenged your DoS I told you to. bic, and xenophobic.” Yet during the with many members in the bar. the views and preconceptions of our Finally, I feel I must apologise course of the evening I, and those I Even had Mr Bloom proved to be members and engaged them to you all. Last issue I mentioned James Mottram have spoken to who were actually in the villain he has been slandered as in dialogue. that I was expecting Big ings attendance, found Mr Bloom to be Mr Bloom certainly fi t the model from this year’s CUSU candidates: none of these things. of a speaker we always aspire to if Oxford could have a President e CUCA Chairman It’s perhaps unsurprising that such invite: not only this eagerness to fully who promised a monorail, surely charges would be levelled at a man “I WOULD CERTAINLY engage, but also an entertaining man- we could come up with something defends his decision who has been demonised in the me- REPEAT MY INVITATION TO ner of speaking, views which may not weirder? Personally I would vote dia for certain turns of phrase, but as get adequate exposure in usual media for anybody who off ered to per- to invite the most of the public appreciated at the MR BLOOM” coverage of politics, and a reputation manently freeze the Cam, simul- time , terms such as ‘Bongo-Bongo that will draw a high attendance not taneously freeing the University controversial Godfrey land’ and a joke in which he referred only from our members but from of boaties and providing us with a Bloom to speak. to his own supporters as ‘sluts’ indi- students at large. Luge track to entertain ourselves cate not retrograde views but rather by the national media, this willing- CUCA is at its best when we post-Winter Olympics. an irreverent sense of humour, some- ness to engage would, to my mind, fulfi l our aspiration to provide our Sadly however, I’ve been once thing rare among the bland majority confi rm the wisdom of my decision to members with the opportunities to again disappointed by this year’s of contemporary politicians. is invite him. develop and challenge their beliefs, student elections. Of the six CUSU judgement was certainly confi rmed CUCA is not a branch of the to explore new ideas and encounter sabbatical positions, one is contest- for those of us who had the pleasure Conservative Party; our Committee the most capable or infamous fi gures ed, three have one candidate and of meeting him. is not responsible for ‘endorsing’ any of right-wing politics. University is a two nobody could even be both- But more important than the fact person by inviting them. Our respon- time for broadening one’s mind and ered to stand for. e one silver lin- that Mr Bloom proved the aspersions sibility is solely to our members, to seeking out new experiences and ing is that this announcement has on his character to be false, was the provide them with the opportunity perspectives, and university politics made the election so boring that fact that he was willing to engage to hear, meet and preferably interact should be no diff erent. even the student newspapers will and be challenged . After his talk Mr with interesting speakers. Were I in a position to make the be tired of it come Monday. So at Bloom took many questions from the We fulfi l that duty best by invit- same decision again I would certainly least on voting day you’ll be spared audience and was happy to give full ing speakers who will do something repeat my invitation to Mr Bloom, if the distress of having to articulate and honest answers to all of them. more than simply trot out a party line anything more confi dently with the quite how much you don’t care. ese included questions on that can be heard every evening on benefi t of hindsight. BARNEY COUCH

Vulture FEATURES ■ LIFESTYLE ■ FASHION ■ CULTURE ■ THEATRE ■ REVIEWS 18 Friday 28th 2014 February THE ART OF THE AWARD by ovninl ewrig o the of remark- re-workings conventional ably radical, apparently market mass to individuals well-placed few a of eff orts well-funded the rewarding cinema’sfor lation commanding, most self-congratu- of ceremony glorifi a ed than more little are Oscars famous mainstream? cinematic the of progression gradual the of recognition arbitrary an merely what extend should we think of this as to offi rigmarole, and of cial occasion executives another mark we Awards. as But Academy annual 86th try’s indus- the of honour in brightest, and fi best among lm’s out doled are men C

nraigy i ses ht h (in) the that seems it Increasingly, as a series of small gold gold small of series a as breath bated with watch fi its of all will – critics lm least at or – world the much of Sunday, this ome metamorphosis into a gargantuan, gargantuan, a campaign. marketing grotesque into slow Award’s metamorphosis Academy the off of another shoot just applauded, being is what of content actual the than carpet red the down traipsed being are that schemes colour the with preoccupied reflfor cultural andrevolution. ection of alisation cinema’s as potential a tool re- eventual the herald or mentation, experi- artistic real up oc- hold to an casion hardly in but will, year you the if 35mm, of retrospective A tion. thatjust as event a – celebra- an event, the of understanding an to contribute announcements, actual the tersperse in- that the pieces set on and performances placed with emphasis now increasing and 1953, since televised Dream. American Nowadays, some people seem more seem people some Nowadays, awards, the of nature whole  e Vulture you die of natural causes, everyone everyone causes, natural of die you you’re Billy the around Kid and people If say? I can “What quipping, quoted once also was He Playbook’s contest. the in Linings part Silver handle to offi lations manager campaign and cer re- public former Obama’s recruiting that the year found last campaign, him game. Oscar thegreat player in dastardly most defi and the nitive, as the process garnering himself a reputation in nominations, 300 astounding an near something up racked dustry, in- the in decades two over just in has, the who man a is WeinsteinHe of Company. co-chairman and Miramax of co-founder Weinstein, Harvey is that conglomerate Hustle, one-man the of tactics American the to given been was has attention much that dozer Such is Weinstein’s commitment to Weinstein’scommitment is Such offi box bull- the ce of wake the In abounds. If these were awards based based awards were these If abounds. deservedness of par- discussion year ticularly, is race. the in what’s of with the worthiness preoccupied seem but the extent to which they sometimes arbitrary them render that Oscars the , by.go to anything Weinstein’sare if budgets of awards thatto up be appear for sale, set a of futility the of be enough evidence surely should strategy and of games terms discussing are people  at roll their competitors into submission. of attempts corporate-funded to steam symbolism their and Oscars the about unbearable exactly is that everything Millionaire. Slumdog against campaign smear of a in involvement allegations his the to response jovial you thinks shot them?” – a remarkably It’s element of the economic not just embodies this of all aside, Ethics Culture

MIKE CURTIS Culture Vulture Friday 28th February 2014 19

on art alone, should the fact that Le- through which they can speak to, and ment of the whole awards season that ity of our deeply entrenched capital- onardo DiCaprio has been nominated be seen by, a much larger audience is underlined again and again by the ist mantras ( e Wolf of Wall Street), three, four, fi ve times without success should never be downplayed, or argua- accompanying commentary, littered or the collapse of historic tenden- be of any relevance? bly discouraged.  e Oscars, and all of throughout with reference to the ‘race’ cies to mute or romanticise the Afri- And why is Matthew McConaughey’s their other institutional counterparts, and its ‘contenders’ – are more appar- can American experience (12 Years a weight loss such a source of overawed play a vital role in providing a platform ent than ever before with the diversity Slave), or even the ethics behind the fascination? Amy Poehler provided for lesser-known, equally evocative of this year’s nominees. faceless, soulless drugs companies the most insightful – if unrelated to and important cinema. Any cinema-goer who has seen both that control our health (Dallas Buyers this debate – fi nal word on the mat- Chiwetel Eijiofor’s painfully dignifi ed Club), fi lm should say something and ter when she pointed out that this was performance in Steve McQueen’s 12 it should encourage its audience to say exactly what every woman ever put “Going to the Years a Slave and DiCaprio’s despotic something back. in front of a camera had been asked turn as Jordan Belfort in  e Wolf of  e winner-loser dichotomy and to do. cinema should Wall Street, will realise the impossi- competitive, market-driven rhetoric But it does nonetheless raise an in- bility of ever fi nding common ground that is fuelled by award season blunts teresting debate about the relevance of on which to assess the two. In fact, it all of this, transforming the cinematic an actor’s commitment to the produc- not be a passive would be hard to fi nd a more polar- experience into a series of statistics tion – and the industry as a whole – to ised, but nonetheless equally enrap- and tick box achievements. an award that should surely be prima- experience, exist ing turing pair – and therein lays the es- Ultimately, it seems to me that cin- rily about performance alone? sential problem of awarding art. ema can be more thorough and fairer  is is before you even get caught up solely within the Film is powerful, or at least it can be, in its recognition through reviews, in the Academy’s preoccupation with and while Michael Bay’s ever expand- rather than reducing it to the posses- both conservatism, an uneasiness that cinematic walls” ing repertoire might not lend itself to sion of a single, quite small statuette, might well damage the chances of Ste- deeper artistic evaluation, fi lm relies which may or may not be the product ve McQueen and company, and self- However, the very categories that on debate and discussion. A good fi lm (among other things) of an exceptional congratulation, which paid off well last many of these off er up remain bland – an Oscar worthy fi lm, if you will – spin doctor. Just as you cannot con- year for Silver Linings Playbook and and generic in the face of the sheer should provoke argument among its dense the power of performances or its charming, if hardly ground-break- variety and scope of today’s cinematic audience. Going to the cinema, much cultural impact of a piece of drama ing portrait of mental health. spectrum. How can we ever even pre- like reading a great novel or wandering into sculpted metal, neither can you All of this is wading dangerously tend to qualify what is best or better? through an extraordinary exhibition, measure merit – and we should stop deeper into the murky waters of the  is article is presuming that cin- should not be a passive experience, ex- trying. merits of awarding art altogether. Ob- ema, or at least cinema as “good art”, isting solely within the confi nes of its When Weinstein looks to his un- viously recognition is crucial, espe- does not have the standardised meas- cinematic walls and lasting an average precedented achievements in facts cially in today’s cut-throat economy, ures that are needed to rank and rate of 120 minutes. and fi gures, he may well feel, and where the prestige that accompanies their relative performance. As small, freestanding snap shots rightly so, that he has won the Acad- a prize can make or break a box of- My frustrations with a series of insti- of social commentary and cultural emy Awards hoopla, but surely there’s fi ce run. In the same vein, the value of tutions that insist on the head-to-head portraits, cinema has the potential to more to cinema than just jumping awards, particularly in cinema, as an confrontations and comparisons that open up a conversation with its view- through hoops? otherwise unprecedented showcase these measures necessitate – an ele- ers. Whether it be about the moral- Helena Pike

FESTIVAL PICKS DIRECTING CHRIS WILLIAMSON Border patrol (Germany) Cambridge’s international fi lm e plans of two border cops are Q: What has been your favorite Watersprite thwarted when they fi nd a suicide festival is just around the corner. moment? victim in the woods. Varsity talks to Marianne Styger, director of this year’s event A: In my fi rst year we had Bill Nighy speak, FICTION so as a very intimidated fresher that was very A Hard World (Iceland) funny. A struggling young boy is instructed Q: What do you think of the Cambridge fi lm by a stranger on how to stand up for scene? himself. Q: What would you say is the purpose of the A: It’s increasing, defi nitely. What’s really reas- festival? suring is that the more people we speak to ACTING about Waterpsrite, the more people then want A: We want to help nurture the next generation Seagulls (Belgium) to go and make a fi lm. of student fi lmmakers. While you think fi lm- Two young actors struggle to exist making is becoming more accessible, it’s actu- together outside of their fi ctional lives. But it is diffi cult when the ADC has such popu- ally becoming more opaque in a way. larity in Cambridge, and that’s how people see ANIMATION entertainment in Cambridge. It’s defi nitely the Wedding Cake (Germany) Q: Are there any events that you’re more prevalent art form. A couple made of marzipan come to specifi cally looking forward to? life and attempt to create a perfect marriage out of icing. Q: Any advice for students in Cambridge A: Yeah, I am actually really intrigued – we have who want to get involved with fi lm? a talk called Journey into Film Design and it traces the art department side of fi lmmaking. I SCREENPLAY A: Well join the committee...It’s a really great think that’s a really fascinating way of looking at More an Two Hours (Italy) way to learn about fi lmmaking in Cambridge, in it, because so much of fi lm has become techni- A boy and a girl wander the streets at the sense that there are several diff erent facets cal now, but there still is this tradition and it’s night, looking for a hospital. and forms you can get involved with, be it the still a form of art and a very creative process, so awards side or the events side. I’m really looking forward to that one. 20 Friday 28th 2014 February it comes to fi Form in aband nding acts. ofchoiceexactly when have the luxury don’t atthat organisers Cambridge event it’s Iknow this, due to the partly fact also well, in the butwhatever truth down goes ourset because often so back are invited Venusband Envy. Ilike to think that we WutheringCats, Wuthering andmy own and Lewis Blonde,Laurie Dirty eFat are Lorelai, time.Amongthese every thatthere ofbands play are ahandful held at  eFountain tell can youthat livemusic nights the occasional frequents Any at studentNot so Cambridge. who music venues to play. huge,is andthere are numerous serious ofgenres butthe variety bands form dents Notonlydoplenty ofstu- ones. vibrant me that the there livemusic scenes are ing at Manchester, tell andBristol Leeds current study- music scene. My friends upits whenyousize to make sense starts  bands ofnotable Cambridge edearth sion to the status ofgreatness. Bandit’s fu- brandofclassical-electronic Clean the weelevate settle before dust let I’d –butpersonally Rather Be prefer to with the charts have topped just Bandit alumniClean College to 2014andJesus Fast-forward inLondon. school at art WatersRoger uphere, met the band grew that is but the truth and whileSyd Barrett of walls on the refurbished eAnchor, celebrated to PinkFloydmight be links  ButCambridge? to list. bands etown’s many too great produced meanwhile, has London, Manchester andthe Smiths. to andthe Beatles Liverpool age, from to their herit- linked musical inseparably are cities northern to mind.Certain W the fi torst town spring isn’t Cambridge music, raphy popular ofBritish hen itcomes to the geog- Jackson Caines asks Caines Jackson why isn't the music scene Cambridge in be it should all Caines asks why the music scene in Cambridg of workloads (our bassist is a NatSci), not a NatSci), is (ourof workloads bassist Butthe reality aweek. or fourthree times wouldloveto rehearse andintheory band In Venus we’re Envy allcommitted to the at suicide worst. academic at best, it’s at Cambridge, feasible, is problematic this indulgence at universities dents some and‘fistyles nding your sound’. For stu- your fellowyourself with members’ band countless for familiarising hoursessential the no replacement rehearsals, for regular allthe innate talent inthe world is great; don’tGreat bands become magically diffi for one. oftimemanagement, culty are more specifi –the c to Cambridge music scene that to athriving obstacles there are other Isuspect not everything. it’s weallknow then, matters, butas Size for musicians.” opportunities and varied could defi donetonitely more provide be butmore artists, interesting Cambridge and new at job publicising doing agreat are Creatives People like Cambridge inwhat’s variety less putoutthere. being there’scrowd, butthen obviously much it’s onanight so event agood to get easy “blessing: onlyone ere tends to be Cambridge’s amixed Lorelai, sees as size sextet singerinsoul-pop Grant, Sophie livemusic opportunities. fewer venues and fewer equals A smallertown names. the ofhousehold spawn majority all,that after It size. the is large cities, Perhaps inCambridge’s lies the answer our student for? world dramais famous that standards andhigh variety richness, bythe same scene notcharacterised Why the is music this the is case? talent, Why, musical burstingwith inatown supply.simply outstrips coterie musical –demand privileged andit’sCambridge nothard this to join Vulture still have aPA.  isn’t is aproblem for andfewer have fewer amps, kit, a drum have inmind.Some bands with designed are rarely too, rehearsal rooms, College pastime. pricey a music playing quickly becomes on taxis; have bands toaround, rely andthis means have to lugtheir amps guitarists out; feeble PA leave singersdrowned systems andcymbals; butsnare drums sticks just not to bring are asked Drummers desired. muchof the leaves set-up often to be the quality arestudent organised, gigs remains that the fact when However achance." liveacts giving Folk for Maypole are good really Nights "Institutions andthe like Ents new Clare Blonde. ofDirty guitarist says GuyClark, "I think the music scene's pretty good," to the box”. think college bar outside my which is thing have –youjust sicians, andfolk mu- scene for singer/songwriters “of Delamere. ere definitely amusic is Daughters offolk trio says Ruby Zajac, have alotontheir plates,” people because simply abitlimited be can gigs organised “Ithink student- organisers. to event extends themselves the from musicians immune is tobridge the timeproblem: it ifwemanagetwo.NooneinCam- lucky Churchill we’re means rehearsal room, to mention availability the ofthe limited much much to be desired." up often leaves quality of set- the are organised, the student gigs"when cry, didthey? that with battle inCambridge revolution at  e Fountain a started . Butnooneever at andmore nights Cindies fewer means eff to challenge theort status quo. is wemake live music aconcerted unless ahub for become never will Cambridge though, When itcomes to andpop, rock ofexcellenthandful bigbands . quite claim the there same prestige, are a cannot Andwhilejazz the ADC. as verse auni- andproductive busy as scene is cal Inmany the ways classi- groups. chamber there are plenty ofelite and orchestras have colleges Most achapel choir, and music. scene is eclassical thriving. other dimensionsofCambridge obscure My interest shouldn’t, inbands ofcourse, for it. music poorer scene is Cambridge May may the wider as balls be, fun that, AndI’d to risks. take and organisers argue reluctance musicians amongboth certain along to.  eside-eff a is ofthis policy ect sing can they something want guests ball inebriated tuxedoed, In other words: are why which encouraged is they setting, . counted well onto inanybe godown Coverscan playin common: covers. they  tend to musicians have ese onething etc. thegroup, acoustic-guitar crooner the reggae band, medley hits the chart menu ofcontrasting aset styles: to expect have come prominence. guests some Ball which livemusic during enjoys calendar exceptional days ofthe Cambridge few scene: May balls. May Week the provides music quirk ofthedistinctive Cambridge sional experience.  to us a brings is amuchwhich promises more profes-  ofcourse, ofgig, type ere acertain is you. against conspiring is bridge but ifyou’re like feel Cam- itcan inaband harmony groups, andclose quartets string e isn't all it should be Culture

DAISY SCHOFIELD

DAISY SCHOFIELD Culture Vulture Friday 28th February 2014 21 INTO THE WILD DAISY SCHOFIELD DAISY SCHOFIELD

Jilly Luke talks to Cambridge literary phenomenon Rob Macfarlane about the language of nature, and the nature of language

arshly lit by the bluing hard sun that dismiss with the deeply troublesome idea that the the water, a means of encouraging us all to Keep an appreciator of the small beauty of colloquial February hoards for itself, college gar- wild is some pure zone or realm then it becomes Calm and Carry On." words and names. In Sussex, a “smeuse” is the H dens in winter both promise delights much more interesting.” Macfarlane is gently but irmly indignant at small hole left in a hedge where an animal has to come and hold beauty at hand. Emmanuel While attracted initially to “very remote and this posturing, noting that former environment moved through it repeatedly and thawing is given College’s garden holds for me a russet-branched high places”, Macfarlane has increasingly been secretary Caroline Spelman "tried to sell of the “compressed poetry” of “ungive”– “that still birch tree, a paddling of ducks, and nature writer interested in the idea of the wild as a complicated the forests" while "Owen 'Badgers Moved My stops me short.” and English fellow Robert Macfarlane, who wants and diicult place: “I recently spent three or four Goalposts' Paterson" has proposed an "ofsetting he acknowledgements at the back of his latest to introduce me to trees. days under Paris in the catacombs there working scheme for ancient woodland which is earmarked book he Old Ways include a healthy list of mu- he crown of Emmanuel is its Japanese Plane out what a city is like from the inside and under- for destruction, as if a 400-year-old oak forest is sicians – “I’m a total Johnny Flynn fangirl.” he Tree which roots again and again wherever it side out and up”. a fungible asset.” fruitful conversation with other artists into which throws its branches down. he tree has been Recourse to nature has long been held as a Macfarlane’s books, which are made up of the Macfarlane’s work can be brought is emblemised there for hundreds of years, watching the sta- tonic for trauma. Might it be – whisper it– that lightest of lyrics, the most heady of myths and by the writer’s real life walk along Holloway Road tion and the college, wintering its leaves down most “culturally contraband” of words 'spiritual'? warmest of histories all at once, do not come to with folk musician Frank Turner, talking about on heads and buses and bikes. We walk in and Macfarlane says he inds himself reaching for a him easily: “I re-write obsessively. Each sentence “the strange way that a city street can possess the around it for a while, feeling our smallness. “semi-sacred language” to describe the gift and will be re-written ifty or sixty times and my same layered density as a deep Dorset lane.” Retiring inside, Macfarlane describes his love good of landscape: “I am interested in the very books take me ive years. hese close artistic ties include a friendship of wild places as going back as long as he can re- private processes of consolation and grace and “Light is a non-verbal medium and scent and with the sculptor Steve Dilworth, who made member, to his childhood “in deep England at the happiness and beauty and encounters with won- air and atmosphere and all the things that make Macfarlane a sculpture of “a dead starling en- end of a country lane in Nottinghamshire” and der that go on throughout the country on a per- up what we call landscape," he explains. "Cliché is cased in dolerite with bronze legs and a vial of holidays spent on Scottish mountainsides. sonal moment by moment basis.” always prowling at the perimeter because so many ink gagging its beak open.” He pauses: “I haven’t Wildness is a diicult term, uncertain of its David Cameron is a man well aware of the people write about landscape and landscape has subjected it to intense interpretation.” place in a "post-natural world”. Macfarlane says consolatory abilities of landscape. Macfarlane attracted this layer of cliché which clings to it and Macfarlane was the chair of the 2013 Man he began his book he Wild Places with a “blithe charges him with “encouraging a cosy, cupcakei- is hard to get through.” Booker Prize jury, a job which allowed him to ignorant deinition” of the wild as “a place abso- ied, Hunter-wellied vision of the rural landscape, Macfarlane takes great pleasure in the layered “read a year’s dreams and visions of writers from lutely beyond human inluence, which is unten- with which the brutalities of austerity politics density of place names and a sense of knowing around the Anglophone world.” But how to even able in the British context and almost disposed can usefully be softened and foliaged." He sug- your own landscape: “Language is a way of bring- begin to judge a book? He laughs and with up- of in a global context". However, he says, "if you gests that "it serves as a kind of green ketamine in ing us into careful intimacy with places.” He is turned palms says: “You read it.” A Closer Look: Bonington THE FITZWILLIAM MUSEUM Gabrielle Watts takes a closer look at what's on display in the Fitzwilliam

occadasse, Genoa, with anticipates the later mastery of his mountains master a quiet drama – Monte Fasce in the back- neighbours across the channel. their monumental form echoes that of ‘B ground’ is a long title for a he painting, oil on board, makes the towering clouds, and as their painting that is beautiful in its sim- good use of the softness that that me- foothills fall down into the sea, so plicity. Depicting both coast and dium allows. Light is used brilliantly their shadows become the darker town, with mountains swallowed by here: the sandbank on which seagulls blue of deep water. rolling clouds in the background, and perch is left gleaming. Next to the his is an ideal painting for invit- gold skeins over the shallows which sea, sun-baked houses, both cream ing meditation – in the masterful dominate the foreground, it is easy to and muted beige, play nicely in a con- relections edged into the shallows, see why Bonington acquired so great trast of texture with the water. in the brief humanising touch of a a reputation for his landscapes. he palette of the painting is woman in the foreground. It is the It is also easy to understand the aesthetically pleasing: gold, blue landscape’s dreamlike atmosphere placing of the piece: tucked in a cor- and white recall the idylls of sum- that makes it enchanting, some- ner just outside the Impressionists mer, and it is no great leap to how recalling Chitty Chitty Bang gallery, since it is here as in his other ind romanticism in Bonington’s Bang, both Hushabye Mountain and works that the artist quite clearly work. In the background, the Lullaby Bay. 22 Friday 28th February 2014 Vulture Lifestyle

THE LENT DELUSION

As exams loom closer, bitter black beer-free bops and our ancestors’ seems a noble gesture against being coffee pervades the air and an icy weeks of near-starvation. Except we defined by consumerism, pretend- draft whistles through the windows, are still warm, healthy and allowed ing we can give it all up whenever we the prospect of pre-Easter abstinence to eat lasagne. Ironically, even a late want. The adolescent idealist beaten looms ever closer. Our flesh seems medieval faster was mimicking the down by years of cynicism is allowed sufficiently flagellated by each morn- hardship of former generations. Pope to emerge once more, whispering ing’s battle to awaken our corpse-like Gregory I ordered that believers ab- that all this ‘stuff’ isn’t that great frames. So why do we still give things stain from “flesh meat, and from all anyway. up for Lent, voluntarily furthering things that come from flesh, as milk, this hardship? Why do even the most cheese, and eggs”. But the rules re- As students reel off their lists of secular of us jump at the chance to laxed to allow not only fish, but also forbidden goodies: sugar, carbohy- renounce our afternoon Snickers for (bizarrely) puffins and beaver tail. drates, foods containing the letter ‘e’, forty days and nights? For centuries we’ve been enjoying it seems many of us don’t even expect the benefits of self-imposed suffering to succeed. Lent is a time of pos- Lent is a kind of second-chance for while minimising our actual denial as sibility; the icy puddles reflect the the New Year’s resolutions we threw much as possible. selves we could be if we didn’t spend out with the leftover sprouts. A year so much time chugging Sainsbury’s is a jolly long time; a month without There remains an undercurrent of Basics wine. We purge ourselves indulgence seems more achievable. piety in Lenten abstinence. Friends of alcohol and chocolate to mirror With the most common resolution might tut at the prospect of the 5/2 an internal cleansing, yet another being to lose weight, popular choices diet, but tell them it’s for Lent and chance for reinvention. But this self- for Lenten abstention – chocolate, al- see the approval pour in . We demand discipline can verge on procrastina- cohol, junk food – offer another shot alcohol-free wine, super-foods and tion. If we can just keep our sticky at bodily perfection. Spring sunshine sympathy for a hardship that is, es- fingers from the biscuit tin, it feels on our shoulders, we have greater sentially, self-inflicted. We masquer- more acceptable to hand in a medio- hope than our fatter and more hung- ade as Mother Teresa while striving cre essay or stay in watching 4oD in- over January counterparts that a for Cara Delevingne. The promise of stead of rallying for the living wage. bikini body is just around the corner. celestial reward still lingers in every Kit Kat we forego; and even the most In the twenty-first century, Lent During the Middle Ages, Lenten fast- irreverent can dress up their vanity means passivity, not activity; abstain- ing involved purgation of the sinful as moral fervour. ing rather than initiating. We can do flesh: ‘Shrove Tuesday’ originates nothing, and still manage to retain with being ‘shriven’ through Catholic And, of course, we cut things out to our demeanour of gleeful smugness. confession. There remains a delicious convince ourselves we don’t need Lent is a time to surprise ourselves, sense of self-sacrifice in indulging them. Like a raging drug addict or to wearily recognise we are exactly this Miltonian ‘purification by trial’. insisting it’s a ‘lifestyle choice’, some- as we thought. We can draw parallels between our how turning down a Burger King Sarah Howden

True Star Cocktail Blockbuster Taste GIGI PERRY e Oscars Who says popcorn is only Ingredients: for eating? Ice Roll out the red carpet, get out the gold men! Shot of gin To recreate the taste of the Dash of caster sugar e Oscars have arrived. Embrace the glitz and glamour as a prelude to May Week. Admit- movies, try this salted Squirt of lemon juice caramel popcorn fl a- Sparkling white wine tedly, the cobbled streets of Cambridge won’t voured vodka, play host to Leo or Judi but we can nevertheless available from Sains- Instructions: bury’s. 1. Put your ice, gin, sugar and celebrate the 86th Academy Awards, Cambridge-style. lemon juice into a jam jar. Oddka do a whole range Give it a good shake. of fantastic fl avours (from 2. Strain into a glass (discard- For fl icks with kicks, check out the student Fresh Cut Grass to Elec- ing the ice) and top with your membership deal at the Arts Picturehouse. For tricity) but this one’s a wine. just £10, they off er a huge variety of winner when it comes to 3. Stir it like the star you are. celebrating the Oscars. 4. Adorn with a thin slice of benefi ts and discounts. lemon and treat your com- Enjoy straight or drop a panions to a rousing accept- Or throw an Oscar-themed bash. Decor: red shot (or two) into a mug before topping ance speech as they thank you with hot chocolate. For the hot choco- profusely for their drinks. and gold. Drink: Gigi’s True Star Cocktail.Out- come: simply fabulous, darling. late, melt chunks of bitter dark choco- Gigi Perry late into steaming milk. Lifestyle Vulture Friday 28th February 2014 23 GIGI PERRY OF THE BEST 3 MEN’S SWEATERS 1. Jemporium Vintage, Grafton Centre Check out this independent vintage shop to nab yourself a bargain. With Cosby-style sweaters as well as more conservative pieces, this is the place for one-off gems.

2. Dogfi sh Men, Trinity Street If you’re after a simple yet casual knit to bridge the seasonal gap, here’s your place. With staple sweaters from Barbour, Carhartt and Folk Clothing you’ll be spoilt for choice.

3. Giulio, King Street You don’t have to be male or in looking for a sweater to fall in love with this store. Stand out from the crowd with their orange crocodile knit jumper. For a more day-to- day piece, their Acne range is sure to hit the spot.

Tales from Tinder

RICH: “It’s pretty addictive. I know a girl from Magdalene with over a thousand matches” By Shrove, you’ve got it! JESS: “My friend met an England rugby player through Tinder - Marland Yarde - and went on a couple of dates with him. They had sushi on their unsure then incorporate a sneaky spatula into second date” Ingredients the move. 2 cups plain flour, pinch of salt, 2 eggs, 2.5 3. With both sides golden and bespeckled, AMY: “My friend went on a tinder date with a guy cups milk, knob of unsalted butter. slide the beauty onto a plate. Either serve the who ‘worked in music’ at the Junction. She queued pancakes as they are ready (these are best for an hour by herself before he turned up devoured hot) or you can cover them with a because he ‘doesn’t do queues’ and it turned out Instructions cloth to keep warm. he in fact worked in McDonalds” 1. Sieve the flour into a big bowl and add the JUDITH: “I’m hideously generous with my Tinder salt. Add both eggs and gradually beat into To top it off likes” the flour to incorporate them. You’re looking For something simple and spectacular, enjoy to eliminate bumps or lumps. Add one cup of your cake with a squeeze of fresh lemon juice milk and beat. Add the rest of the milk and and a scattering of sugar. There is, however, Best Chat stir into the mixture before leaving the batter much comfort and pleasure to be gleaned to chill in the fridge. from different toppings. An easy deviation SAM: “Hey babes. What has 2. When you’re ready to eat, heat a frying pan from the traditional is to substitute the lemon seventy two teeth and holds back the Incredible and drop in some butter. Swirl around before juice for orange and caster sugar for brown. Hulk? My zipper” spooning in enough batter to thinly coat the A gloriously decadent alternative is to serve JOSH base of your pan. Cook until the bottom is : “I bet your name is Jacob. You’re a real with whipped cream, melted dark chocolate cracker” golden before flipping. If you’re confident, the and berries. My personal favourite is lemon no-utensil flip is darned impressive. If you’re curd, thick cream and crushed meringues. WILL: “You are one hot slice of berry pie”

oulez vous coucher avec because she hasn’t come across your moi ce soir?”. is isn’t just profi le… “ V a Labelle lyric, but also Love me Tinder Is there any validity in judging oth- the opening line of a recent Tinder ers solely by their appearance? is encounter. At least it made more of Gigi Perry on Tinder charm and chastity is, indeed, part of Tinder’s charm. an attempt at class than, “Sit on my We constantly judge people on ap- William?”, though it lacked the wit left to disregard. It’s all anonymous of novel terms such as ‘tindercide’, procrastination in the library? pearance, and Tinder rewards this. of another charmer’s “You’re sau- until someone you ‘like’, likes you ‘tinderoni’ and ‘tindernoia’, among What better way to pass the time Judgement is the name of the game. cier than a direct hit from the Heinz back. umb’s the word. And then others. than checking out the locals? And It appeals to our ego, tapping into factory”. you chat. And the rest, as they say, Many students need a helping most of them, you already know. what we all want to know: who, of Tinder: the smartphone dating is history? hand on the dating front, yet on- Countless Cambridge hook-ups those we fi nd attractive, is attracted app that blends profi le matches and According to Tinder, it is. e app line options seem more reserved for happen thanks to Tinder. at guy to us. Matching with the guy you’ve texting. Or, as urban dictionary puts claims to generate more than six those in their thirties. Hello, Tinder! you met on a swap? Check. e girl been checking out is instantly grati- it, “ e McDonalds for sex”. It gath- million matches a day, and says there Little time investment is required, you spotted in the UL? Ditto. Pre- fying, and adds to the addictive na- ers basic information from your have been fi fty resulting marriage ditto personal information and it can Tinder, you had to hope to somehow ture of the app, fuelling a craving for Facebook profi le to match you with proposals. Such is its popularity that be passed off as a bit of fun. It gives bump into them in Fez, or embrace approval. And all without emotional like-minded people. Compatibility is a new condition has been diagnosed: us the confi dence we might have the bold Facebook add. Now, there is investment. As a generation with a based on geographical location and Tinderitis. e localised pain is, ap- lacked in reality. It has encouraged a an alternative. All without the fear of craving for immediacy and a reliance mutual friends and interests. For parently, a harmful side eff ect of in- dating revival. rejection: because Tinder appears to on smartphones, it seems fi tting to the uninitiated: you see their pho- cessant swiping. It has even widened It is well-suited to our time-de- suggest suitors at random, if that girl surrender even this aspect of our tograph, then swipe right to like or our vocabulary, seeing the invention prived lives. Five minutes of bored hasn’t liked you back, it might just be lives to our hand-held device. en 24 Friday 28th February 2014 Vulture Fashion ror

Fallen Decadence Fashion Vulture Friday 28th February 2014 25

Styling by Jacob Mallinson Bird. Make-up by Olivia Galvin and Jacob Mallinson Bird. Photographed by Barney Couch. Models: Ruth Jenkins, Sarah-Jane Ewart and Marina McKennel Clothes: Sian Hofman, he Model Traitor, Christian Louboutin, Hermes, Versace and models’ own. 26 Friday 28th February 2014 Vulture eatre RACHEL HUNTER RACHEL HUNTER

Another Line What can we learn from the reception of e Other Line? A P

1. Reviews vary. Of the four which e Other Line received, two gave it fi ve stars (Varsity and the Tab); one four (CTR); and one six points out of ten (TCS). ey varied in length (from 396 to 612 words), in formal- ity, in quality, and in subject matter. 2. Reviews converge. Each touched on plot. Each admired the acting; three singled out Mary Galloway (‘Mads’) for praise. All four review- ers were women. Each mentioned the feminist angle. 3. Reviews diverge. e feminist RACHEL HUNTER angle was a source of disagreement. An extended debate in the Tab comments about female-written ADC shows does little to illuminate RACHEL HUNTER Sophie Williams’s claim that e Other Line is “important historically and politically”. Hannah Greenstreet is probably closer to the truth in ad- mitting that “the play itself is not an excoriating interrogation of gender relations. But why should it be?” Why indeed? Marketing aside, it seems incidental that it has no real male parts. 4. Reviews converge and diverge at the same time. You might call this the paradiastole eff ect: the rhetori- Charlotte Taylor talks to the director and cast cal term for making virtue of a vice. (A coward is cautious, a simpleton sincere.) Sophie Williams and Becky Rosenberg thought the play-world’s “restrictive reproductive policy” was subtle and believable; Hannah Greenstreet labelled it gratuitous, and Sian Avery felt the “play strug- gles to focus on any one subject”. ey comment on precisely the same thing – the tangible distance between emotion and politics in e Other Line, its refusal to adopt a decisive position on the policy – to conclude opposite things. (I’m kind of with the naysayers on this one: I don’t quite see what the play is targeting. It keeps mention- ing China: are ‘thresholds’ and ‘im- plants’ analogous to the much-ma- e Duchess of Malfi ligned One Child Policy? Or are they aimed more generally, at policies . S. Eliot famously said that all about chastity”. She is a strong woman, and – likewise the set is going to do the same.” Sound that restrict control over one’s own Jacobean dramatist John Webster one “whose desire is given value within the play”. will also play an important role in the produc- body – abortion laws, for example? was much possessed with death, ere is also interest for the actors in the role tion, descending into a mix of broken chords and It’s not impossible that the system and saw “the skull beneath the skin” reversal between Antonio and the Duchess: jarring sharps to match the scenery. ey create was both well-introduced – that is, in every act on stage. In none of “She has the power, she comes onto him”. is a sense of a “whole world being deconstructed” piecemeal; avoiding clunky exposi- Webster’sT plays can the skull be seen so clearly production stages Antonio as the “wife-fi gure” as the tragedy tightens its grip on the characters. tion – and implausible.) leering through the drawn, waxen fl esh as in e to the Duchess. It is these ideas of gender, sex, is production is set against a backdrop of 5. e Other Line was good. If Duchess of Malfi . and power that Quinney says she would sell the Italian Fascism in 1933. Kettles states that when Sophie Williams’s exuberance feels Death pervades this tale of love, corruption, play on. she was reading the play the idea of Fascism exaggerated (“I couldn’t help but and the violent domination of women. In an at- What immediately becomes clear of the illuminated her understanding of it: it seemed admire everything they have done tempt to secure her own happiness, the Duchess cast and crew is the delight they take in their to be a natural fi t. Says James Bloor, who plays here”), it is also understandable. of Malfi , played by Charlotte Quinney, marries characters and Webster’s idiosyncratic dialogue Ferdinand, “What is contained in fascism, which So much in the play was splendidly against the wishes of her tyrannical broth- for each. “ ey’re real”, says Quinney, and as a focuses this play”, is its ideological nucleus: “one, done that it’s frightening it was done ers – Ferdinand and the Cardinal – to the lowly result Kettle is determined to put the emphasis strength; two, control; and three, order. And by people my age. Antonio. is starts a chain of events which on the characters in this reading of the play. purity comes out of order, and control of women 6. e Other Line wasn’t perfect. result in tragedy and the merciless shedding of “It’s not trying to get across any message”, she comes out of strength and order”. You assume you don’t adjust your innocent blood. asserts, and her aim is for the audience to “fi nd e cast and crew express some dissatisfac- standards too much for student writ- Isabelle Kettle, the production’s director, the truth in it through the actors and through the tion with updates of plays which add aesthetic ing, but it’s probably no coincidence acknowledges that the more sensational aspects relationships”. As much as the characters strive eff ects but contribute little to meaning. Bloor that only the severest review didn’t of the Duchess’s plight may be the ones which to fi nd their own individuality and meaning in remarks that a traditional “costume drama” feels mention its writers, Ellen Robertson draw people in. She herself laughingly quips that an oppressive and masculine world, so must the too much like a story and produces something and Hellie Cranney. ey are indis- she thinks “sex and violence are really interest- audience in the course of the play. that feels distant. at is the very antithesis of putably brilliant. But elements of ing”. It is the characterisation which has helped e actors hope to induce the same emotional- Quinney’s Duchess, and I hope they will succeed the play – cringe-making comedy the play endure, however, and this was what ity that they experienced in rehearsing this play. in creating the forceful, realistic and nuanced revolving around the handling of a attracted her to directing it, in particular the Quinney admits freely that she felt overwhelmed production they hope to. homosexual relationship, for exam- role of the Duchess – a rare example of a woman by e Duchess of Malfi at times. Kettle has ple – may have been less happily re- at the centre of a Jacobean tragedy. Quinney sought to rack up the emotional turmoil, and Charlotte Taylor ceived from a known playwright. notes that what Webster seems to be doing for “there will be a strong sense as the play goes e Duchess of Malfi runs at the ADC from 7. Reviews matter. Fallible, cer- the fi rst time is portraying a woman who “isn’t through – and everything collapses and unravels Tuesday 25 February to Saturday 1 March. tainly; but useful catalysts for criti- cal thought and debate all the same. heatre Vulture Friday 28th February 2014 27

Les Parents Terribles Eloise Davies reports on an unconventional interview with the team behind Les Parents Terribles... here’s a charming simplicity Olivia Morgan, Assistant Director, “It’s a disagreement. very careful to make sure they were the right in George Kan’s reason for di- hard play to work with. I would be a bad farce “She’s a very interesting character – so people at the auditions. Léo’s deinitely the recting Cocteau’s Les Parents if you played it too comically – you have to uncommonly textured,” responds Freeman, hardest. Ella’s got very hard things to convey, Terribles: “It’s just a good try and get the truth of the characters.” “here are deinite moments of sympathy but she’s also a character that can’t be very play”. his is no groundbreak- Particularly striking are the incestual un- for her, when you see how she’s been driven facially expressive and Ella had to get out of Ting project, looking to push the boundaries dercurrents: Georges (Raph Wakeield) is to her incestuous, weird, unbalanced nature. her eyebrow raising tendencies. It’s all about of theatre. What it does look guaranteed to married to Yvonne (Yasmin Freeman), but She’s not a submissive character.” watching her eyes for expression.” provide, however, is a highly entertaining unhappy because his wife’s excessive love “he family revolves round her craziness. Konzon has been rehearsing with a ciga- evening out. for their son Michel (Jamie Armitage) leaves here’d be a huge void without her,” contin- rette to try and create this facially relaxed Written during an eight day opium binge, him feeling excluded. Yvonne’s sister, Léo ues Morgan. performance. It’s been very successful, al- the play is an unusual mix of parts. Even Kan (Ella Konzon), also lives with them. She has “he men in the play are the ones who though unfortunately the Corpus Playroom inds its intentions somewhat confusing; always loved Georges, but had to accept that are being messed around – the women rules don’t allow smoking during a show. “Some scenes it’s like farce, and then sud- he married her sister instead. To further have the upper hand – especially Léo. And Kan is disappointed. “he play’s not re- denly there’s some strange sincerity about complicate things, Michel is in love with Madeleine’s got a lot of power over both ally related to time and place, but it has love. Part truth, part melodrama, part com- Madeleine (Kay Dent), who just happens Georges and Michel” Konzon adds. got that air of culture, opera and smoky edy, part not – it’s just the right zone for me. to also be his father’s mistress. As Freeman How does Kay Dent, playing Madeleine, lamboyance.” He thinks he’s written a kitchen sink drama, puts it, “It’s like Cocteau took the character deal with that level of admiration? “Oh, I’m he intimate Corpus set does have its ad- but it’s Cocteau’ s kitchen, so it’s on opium list and then scribbled all over it – that’s the used to it – it’s great,” she jokes. vantages though, and Morgan hopes this will and bears no relation to reality.” relationship.” Freeman can see something of the point create the claustrophobia of the family lat he cast seem well-suited to represent I have to ask one irresistible question. Cavendish is making, though. “I suppose you for the audience: “he play’s so dependent this world of endearing chaos, although they Given the incest in the play, do they feel could read Yvonne as creating the problems, on the relationships. he atmosphere chang- assure me that they have not tried rehears- they’ve become particularly – um – close as by making Georges so impotent as the head es with every character that enters and exits. ing on opium themselves. Our interview a cast? of the household, and she has a very hysteri- It’s all about who’s in the next room...” is illed with relaxed laughing and joking, “In some ways!” laughs Konzon, “here is cal nature. But then Léo is such a contrast, Dramatic tension even manages to seep sporadic interruption from the door alarm, a certain degree of intimacy...” so there’s a very mixed dynamic, and no into our interview. “You haven’t given away a monologue about gloves and a discussion “hough I hope that nothing quite like stereotypes.” the ending have you?” asks Kan of the cast. of what the directors would do if the actors that happens to any of us in real life!” says “Yes, I’d say I’ve worked with many char- hey had not, did not, and would not. So mutinied and started a spontaneous sword- Morgan. acters like Georges before, he’s normal,” it seems the only way to discover the secret ight on stage (put on a blackout, if you were Incest is not the only theme that has agrees Morgan, “But the female characters is to go buy a ticket. wondering). brought the play critical opprobrium in the are very diferent. I’ve never worked with a For all that, this is a play with a dark side. past. Dominic Cavendish once said that the Léo or Yvonne before. Every character had a Les Parents Terribles runs at 7pm You just “end up enjoying the characters’ role of Yvonne “lirts with misogynist cari- really distinctive voice, and we’ve spent most from March 4 to March 8 at the Corpus tragedy because its so twisted”, explains cature”. he cast, however, are unanimous in of the rehearsal time on that. We had to be Playroom.

Pornography What’s Trending? ADC Theatre, 26th Feb to 1st March, 11pm Reviewed by Alice Corr Roughs @Rebekah-Miron Clayton () When you choose to stage a play called Pornography, you know you are court- “the whole production team is to be applauded ing controversy. he Clare Actors took for successfully tackling such a strange and chal- up the challenge with their unnerving lenging pair of Beckett’s pieces.” and at times underwhelming produc- tion of Simon Stephens’s insight into our national psyche during the week of On Her Majesty’s Business @ChloeCliffordAst- the 2005 London bombings. bury () he complex and abstract play is a brave undertaking for director “Often humorous (...) many roared with laughter Maddie Skipsey, whose admirable (...) far from unpleasant.” interpretation is critical to the play’s success. Stephens’s instructions are that Pornography can have any Footlights Smoker @LilyLindon () number of actors, and that its scenes “A number of themes recurred in sketches can be performed in any order. What we get is a cast of seven who, through throughout the evening” monologues and ensemble pieces, relate the ostensibly unconnected Grey Matters @SiobhanFlesher () stories of eight people in London over the days surrounding 7/7. “the most accessible portrayal of mental illness I he voyeurism implicit in have ever encountered” Pornography is captured efectively throughout. All of the characters en- acting is powerful and engaging: the down by what appeared to be the odd gage in some form of forbidden activ- way the cast conveys the physical on-stage giggle. Don Giovanni @ImogenSebba () ity, whether a schoolboy stalking his space of a bus, train or tube trip is While we never escape the sense “the cast (...) and orchestra below were bursting teacher (Harry Gower), siblings enter- utterly compelling, and the bomber’s of unease that pervades the play, it is ing into an incestuous relationship thrill as he heads towards the eu- not always for the right reasons and with talent” (Laura Waldren and Lilly Lindon), phoric act of terror is tangible. he the lack of emotional engagement is or setting of to commit a terrorist play succeeds in making us ultimately disappointing. he production is at its Murder in a Cathedral @KenzaBryan () attack. Audiovisual material is used complicit in the devastation, revealing most successful when we are drawn well, reinforcing the pornographic to us our own destructive tendencies. into the humanity of its characters, “truly masterful, relying only on the strength of its treatment of modern living: contem- Outside the ensemble scenes, and Laura Waldren as the troubled, acting and the ethereal setting” porary news reports are screened at however, the acting is weaker. he incestuous sister deserves particular the back of the stage, stylising terror- cast’s portrayal of relationships and mention in this regard. However, it ism for our consumption. emotions all too often lacks authentic- never feels controversial, provocative Science! The Musical @JamesTaylor () he production’s most triumphant ity. he pace drags at times, and, while or poignant, which, for a play entitled “a light-hearted tale (...) packed with charmingly scene is its ensemble portrayal of the the humour provides light relief, its Pornography, can leave the audience bomber en route to destruction. he otherwise efective delivery was let feeling rather short-changed. bad puns and amusingly ill-fitting rhymes” 28 Friday 28th February 2014 Vulture Reviews

House of Cards, Season 2 Netfl ix If you haven’t watched Season One of Underwood which sends a very clear House of Cards, my advice is to do so, message: Underwood is, for now, now! Binges of the show are so addic- in control of who, how and why he tive (Netfl ix releases all the episodes speaks to people. at’s not to say on the same day) that once you’ve there isn’t humour - Underwood now watched the opening episode, you can smokes an e-cigarette and delivers the look forward to a productivity-free line “Addiction without the conse- ings I’ve learnt weekend as you become captivated by quences” with a confi dence that will Spacey’s North Carolina accent. e probably be appropriated in future from awards season way he pronounces ‘Majority whip’, advert campaigns - but what’s on the ‘where’, or any word with ‘wh’ in it is line for each character in this season is worth a Netfl ix subscription alone. more important. Fiona Stainer Season Two begins where Season Netfl ix’s model of releasing the One left off . Francis Underwood episodes all at once is something I e Oscars this Sunday mark the (Spacey) has been told he’s to be Vice applaud. I hope it continues for many end of awards season: sad news for President of the United States. Zoe more shows in the future. Although statuette engravers, excellent news Barnes, journalist and Underwood’s Game of rones continues to rake for my productivity levels. former extramarital interest is, with in the awards and the viewership e amount of times in the last her colleague Janine Skorsky and her ratings, it is also a show that fails to few months that my friends and boyfriend Lucas Goodwin, trying be formally progressive. It is the most I could be found hidden in the to uncover how Underwood got the pirated show on the planet and this, library scrolling through red carpet position. Claire, Francis’ wife, remains surely, must be down to the fact that photos and poring over dresses, stuck in a bitter court battle. Douglas they sporadically release episodes at when we should have been por- Stamper (Underwood’s right hand diff erent times in diff erent places. ing over journal articles, are too man) is working to keep his boss House of Cards’ supreme great- numerous to bear thinking about. safe and Raymond Tusk, the nu- ness lies both in its narrative and the It hasn’t been a complete waste clear magnate and power hungry progressiveness of its format. I’m of time, though.* Here are some advisor to the President remains looking forward to watching the things I’ve learnt: a pain in Under wood’s Peachoid. rest of Season Two and the third How to combine work with my Season season when it addiction to live feeds. Twitter Two’s fi nally comes is bad enough, but awards season opening out (report- is a diff erent ball game entirely. lacks the edly in e good news is I’ve got pretty humour 2015). good at pretending to read articles of Season David while stealthily refreshing a tab on One. Godwin my phone every three minutes for ere news of further wins. are fewer PHIL KNEEN I should never designate dramatic the morning after an awards asides from ceremony for important work NETFLIX because I will invariably end up From Root to Tip: Botanical Art fl icking between fashion blogs and Fitzwilliam Museum, until 11th May YouTube as I deconstruct every wardrobe decision and watch every Located in the Shiba Gallery at the Joseph Banks to Princess Elizabeth, single acceptance speech and press Fitzwilliam Museum, this exhibition daughter of George III. Among its room video available. is the perfect choice to usher in the most delightful details are the Banksia I must accept that I will never spring. A selection of watercolours by fl owers as a visual pun below Banks’ be as classy as Lupita Nyong’o. I both professional and amateur British name. At the other end, Georg Ehret’s can’t decide if her best look was the artists, it draws on the eighteenth paintings are diagrammatic, carefully bright blue SAG awards dress or and nineteenth centuries. ough deconstructed and labelled. Next to the emerald green Dior gown she one may not expect the sort of drama the splendour of roses, weeds add sported at the BAFTAs. I just know that can be found in the neighbouring welcome diversity. Among these is that I really need to borrow one of John Craxton exhibition, this small an illustration of Cat’s Ear by Paxton them for May Week. space is full of unexpected stories. Chadwick, commissioned by Penguin Critics love to moralise. It’s Among the artists whose work is books. all ‘Everyone must watch 12 Years exhibited is Mary Moser (1744-1819), Finally, there are some that repre- a Slave for its stark portrayal of the fi rst woman in Britain to pursue a sent remarkable fl owers in themselves: slavery’, and ‘No one should watch professional career as a fl ower painter one such specimen is the Hibiscus e Wolf of Wall Street unless they and one of the Royal Academy’s two Splendens drawn by W Green. e support exploiting the poor and female founding members. A painting plant, notoriously diffi cult to bring to degrading women’. Yes, everyone of hers that stands out is from a series bloom, had fl owered under the care should watch 12 Years A Slave, but in which the season of a bouquet is of W H Osborn in Birmingham the everyone should watch e Wolf of matched to the corresponding zodiac previous year. Nymphomaniac Wall Street as well. Why? Because on the vase in which it was painted. An attractive plant native to part tips the scales at just over two they’re both brilliant fi lms. I’d like While Moser and others were clear- Eastern Australia, Hibiscus Lars von Trier hours. You would think that this, cou- to think that I have enough of a ly painting fl owers for their own Splendens and other newly pled with the often brutal viscerality of moral compass myself to acknowl- sake, others are more accessible varieties of the fi lm, would make it unwatchable. edge that the behaviour exhibited functional. On fl ower contributed to the Yet Von Trier’s particular skill is not by DiCaprio et al is probably not one end of popularity of botanical to overlay the drama, which is spread the epitome of moral conduct. this spec- drawing in this period. If, as Alfred Hitchcock says, “ e suffi ciently evenly so as neither to is Jennifer Lawrence infatu- trum are the e exhibition fi nishes length of a fi lm should be directly bore, nor to overwhelm his audience. ation is getting out of hand. It’s mixed fl ow- on the 11th of May and related to the endurance of the hu- Given Stacy Martin’s insistence in not like I don’t love her. I’ll be the ers painted by is the perfect rem- man bladder,” it would seem Lars Von the post-screening Q&A that she and fi rst to admit that I’ve spent slightly Franz Andreas edy to the stresses of Trier has got it all wrong. ough Charlotte Gainsbourg never explic- too long watching her photobomb- Bauer (1758- weeks 7 and 8, and a the Picturehouse were particularly itly discussed the protagonist whose ing Sarah Jessica Parker, revelled 1840). ese gentle segue into the cruel in screening the two parts of his role they share, the consistency of perhaps a little too much in my fl owers border new season. Nymphomaniac back-to-back (albeit the characterisation of Joe across ‘Awards Season J-Law’ result a whimsical note Gabrielle Watts with a brief, merciful interval), each the two parts is impressive. Martin’s

on BuzzFeed’s ‘Which Jennifer written from Sir THE FITZWILLIAM MUSEUM Lawrence are you?’ quiz, and would cite the microwave incident in American Hustle as one of my EVENT CONCERT EXHIBITION WATERSPRITE favourite cinema moments of the season. But truthfully, that Golden Globe probably belonged to Lupita. Watersprite Hiroaki Takenouchi The Moving Word Ditto the BAFTA. So hurry along Oscars, and allow The Cambridge International Student Kettle’s Yard will host internationally A celebration of the manuscripts me to bring this prolonged period Film Festival featuring talks from Rob renowned pianist Hiroaki Takenouchi held by the University Library and of procrastination to a close. Oh, Brydon and Richard Curtis - and it’s as part of the 2014 New Music colleges in Cambridge. and please keep your speeches all free! Series. brief and your dresses unremark- able – I’ve got an essay to write on 7th-9th March 12.15pm, 2nd March Until 17th April Monday. John’s Divinity School Kettle’s Yard, Cambridge University Library *Okay. It probably has. www.watersprite.org.uk Reviews Vulture Friday 28th February 2014 29

Only Lovers Left Alive Jim Jarmusch Over the past few years, literature, Adam is portrayed as the ultimate MAGNOLIA PICTURES television and cinema have been romantic hero. With raggedy hair, a littered with various depictions of pallid complexion and an eff ortlessly vampires, werewolves and supernatu- cool demeanour, he is the refl ective, ral creatures. From tween favourite poetic and tortured ‘artiste’.  e only Twilight to the more recently televised person keeping him alive is Eve, his Dracula, the genre never ceases to soul mate, who is more balanced and be a goldmine of entertainment and satisfi ed with life. inspiration. Only Lovers Left Alive is Jarmusch fi lms in two contrast- alternative cinema stalwart Jim ing locations, Detroit and Jarmusch’s fi rst foray into the Tangiers. Both are shabby vampiric. and worn-down cities. Jarmusch’s last venture  ey are the perfect loca- was the narratively complex tions for the artistically-  e Limits of Control, but inclined characters, here he turns to comedy. both cities being sub-  e wry humour and ject to social change deadpan quips from and upheaval. the protagonist Despite the work well with vampires’ bohe- Jarmusch’s lan- mian lives, they guorous and slow face looming plot style, not to mention threats, such as his studied, intellectualised the arrival of Eve’s brat- dialogue. In one scene, Kit tish and volatile sister (John Hurt) casually drops Ava, and contami- into a conversation with his nated blood from the vampire friend Eve (Tilda ‘zombies’ – hu- Swinton) that he wrote mans. However, Hamlet, later gesturing to the vampires a picture of Shakespeare continue living that he is an “illiter- through reinvention ate philistine.” It is also and nomadic lifestyles. revealed that Kit is in fact RPC In addition to the existential Christopher Marlowe. musings and intellectualism,  e academic tone does not feel music features heavily in the fi lm. contrived or irritating. It is more Adam is a musician, desperately a tongue-in-cheek humour, like clinging onto to his reclusion and the names of the main couple, Adam relative unknown.  e overall sound- (Tom Hiddleston) and Eve. All past track blends a mix of haunting guitars culture and art is turned on its head and traditional Maghreb music. during the fi lm. Artists are revealed to Visually and aurally evocative, be frauds, such as when Adam men- Jarmusch’s fi lm creates a searching tions that he gave one of his pieces to and melancholic tableau of life and Schubert, and Byron is described as a romanticism. terrible bore. Rebecca Rosenberg

CUMS Chorus West Road Concert Hall In their rendition of three renowned fl ute. Although the mezzo-soprano Baroque Psalm-settings, Cambridge passages delivered by Helen Charlston University Music Society delighted occasionally felt strained, the soloist the ear with an energetic and performances were mostly highly pol- rhythmically tight performance that ished.  e chorus exhibited a master- imbued these works with something ful handing of Rameau’s counterpoint, new. It being my fi rst visit to West attentively and sensitively voicing Road Concert Hall, I was thoroughly each and every layer. Poor pitching in impressed with the venue’s acoustics. the upper strings took away from the Despite a less than optimal seat in the harmonic brilliance now and then; fi rst half, the music came in mighty however, this was a small glitch amid waves, fi lling every corner of the hall. otherwise highly competent playing.  e performance began with  e night ended with Handel’s Dixit Bach’s Cantata no. 196, Der Herr Dominus, which was well-placed in visible confi dence and sexual candour While nudity, sex and violence innocent and contrast with Joe’s denket an uns.  e fi rst chorus was the programme, allowing the concert demonstrate a maturity that belies pervade the fi lm, the humour and expectation of judgement. brought glowingly to life with gusto, to fi nish with a work in which all her inexperience. Gainsbourg, who humanity prevail. Joe (Charlotte Nymphomaniac is a narratively and the conductor Ralph Woodward soloists came into their own - Camilla plays the older Joe, grates as the Gainsbourg), has been beaten up thematically dense fi lm, it as much a skilfully bringing out the full contra- Seale’s contributions were particularly self-pitying narrator of Volume I, and is taken in by Seligman (Stellan story about life as it is about sex.  e puntal depth in Bach’s notes.  e fi rst outstanding. though by Volume II is showing off Skarsgard).  eir one-room conver- overarching importance of nature aria, performed by soprano Rachel Overall, CUMS gave a supreme her characteristic ease in even this sation drives the narrative, framing and Joe’s search for her ‘soul tree’ Ambrose Evans, delivered complex performance, introducing new most demanding of roles - one which Joe’s recollections under chapter underline the crux of the fi lm, the passages of heavy ornamentation with warmth and vivacious colour to these verges on psychosis. Smaller roles, headings inspired by objects in the desire to become settled with oneself. eff ortless lyrical simplicity. A tenor celebrated psalm-settings of the High however, are more of a mixed bag: on room.  e fl itting back from Joe’s sto- However, as with any Von Trier fi lm, and bass duet followed which, while Baroque. A sense of Woodward’s love the upside, we have Jamie Bell shining ries to the room to show Seligman’s there is no satisfying or resolved end- perhaps slightly lacking in dynamic for the works was conveyed by his as a sunken-eyed sadomasochist; on reactions provides the comedy. ing. Von Trier has instead highlighted variation, was tight in execution. sensitive yet strong conducting, an the downside, we have Shia LaBeouf’s  e audience sees his bewildered and problematised the link between Rameau’s setting of Psalm 84 Quam emotion which was reciprocated by hopelessly inscrutable accent. expressions; his geeky digressions marginalisation and female desire. dilecta tabernacula opened with the performers, enriching the great Rivkah Brown inspired by the stories are delightfully Rebecca Rosenberg light, gentle passages of lilting com- music. munication between strings and James Taylor

THEATRE EXHIBITION THEATRE ALBUM DAVID BALTZER DAVID Western Society Translations Notes G I R L Returning after last year’s We English Touring Theatre return with Showcasing the very best works of Are Gob Squad And So Are You, Certifi ed superstar Pharrell Williams the story of a clash of two worlds, art published in Notes over the past Cambridge Junction welcome back follows up his Blurred Lines succes which threatens the heart of the 2 years alongside new works from international innovators Gob Squad with a paen to all the “helpless community as they struggle to practicing artists. with brand new show Western romantics” out there interpret each other. Society. 28th February 3rd March Tue 11 - Sat 15 Mar Judith E. Wilson Studio, English Faculty 1st March Columbia Records Cambridge Arts Theatre Cambridge Junction 30 Friday 28th February 2014 Sport Let’s stand up for the FA Cup

LIZZIE MARW City’s domination of Chelsea in this e Cup still has year’s fi fth round kept alive Manuel something to off er all Pellegrini’s dream of winning four trophies in his fi rst season. Arsenal’s For the love of teams - great or small defeat of Liverpool, though, was the RONNIE MACDONALD fi fth-round highlight – a classic high- SPORT Charlie Moore tempo cup-tie. Both managers made Sports Perspective changes to their teams - it is apparently Matt Worth customary to play one’s second-choice e benefi ts of the FA Cup to lower goalkeeper in the FA Cup - but the big ARCHERY league teams have seldom been ques- names nonetheless featured. For the tioned. Sell-out ties with big clubs of- Gunners, Mesut Oezil graced the pitch King Harold taking an arrow in the ten provide fans with season highlights, with his poise and balance, while Alex eye. Peasant militiamen getting in create much-needed revenue and give Oxlade-Chamberlain’s pace gave the some sneaky practice in the forest players a chance to impress. to please the King. Robin Hood. Recently, though, the value of the FA Men in tights. I’ll admit that my un- Cup to Premier League teams has been derstanding of archery could prob- questioned. In early January, Aston “EVIDENCE SUGGESTS THE ably have used some updating prior Villa boss Paul Lambert gave a scathing TOP TEAMS STILL TAKE THE to this weekend. assessment of the fading status of the Wenger and Arsenal: renewed interest in the FA Cup? Nonetheless, there was some- FA Cup in modern football. He con- FA CUP SERIOUSLY” thing about the sport that drew me troversially claimed that most Premier major piece of silverware disappear. Look at Sunderland’s recent example in. e quiet intensity of this an- League managers would rather do For weaker clubs, progress in the Successful cup runs have been instru- cient art, the solitary focus of the without the competition: “If they were Cup might be a double edged sword. mental in gelling Gus Poyet’s players archer as he hones his craft, draw- being honest, they probably would.” He Liverpool defence a torrid time. Birmingham City went down hav- and providing them with self-belief. ing ever closer to the perfect score... argued that the Cup clogs an already ere was no sign that either man- ing won the League Cup in 2011, and At this stage of the season, the games all this seemed consistent with, but hectic schedule and distracts from the ager wanted to do away with the FA Wigan won the FA Cup and were rel- do come thick and fast. But winning also a refreshing break from, the more important fi ght for victory or Cup. Arsene Wenger, after eight years egated in 2013. them builds momentum and makes for scholarly lifestyle I like to think I survival in the Premier League. without silverware – a period in which In truth, though, it seems unlikely a healthy dressing room. lead. So it was that I found myself Lambert is surely misguided. Of Pep Guardiola retired as a player, be- that the mere removal of a few cup e FA Cup off ers Premier League at the University Sports Centre on the last 20 Cups, Chelsea have won came a manager, won 16 trophies with games would have transformed Wigan’s teams another chance for silverware Sunday morning for my fi rst ever 5, Manchester United 4, Arsenal 4 Barcelona, took a year out, returned ability to compete in the entirely dif- and can actually help them out of a taste of the sport. and Liverpool 2. Manchester City and and won two trophies with Bayern ferent context of a 28-game league sticky situation in the League. So long A brave friend had off ered to Everton also feature on the winners’ Munich – has understandably become campaign. Wigan’s defence in particu- as the Cup remains full of rivalry, dra- show me the ropes. I arrived to fi nd list. It is clear that the top teams have more willing to play his best players in lar had been a growing liability for at ma, upset and delight, most Premier him fully strapped up and armed to taken the FA cup seriously. cup competitions. Brendan Rogers, on least two years. In any event, a cup run League managers, teams, and fans will the teeth, looking ready to accom- ey continue to do so. Manchester the other hand, saw one shot at his fi rst can have a positive impact on a team. rightly continue to take it seriously. pany John Rambo deep into enemy territory. Assuming the enemy is the Sheriff of Nottingham. Anyway. He (my pal, not the Sheriff of Orienteers take Cambridge Nottingham) explained archery to me as a mixture of muscle memory,

fourth place at ZUZANA STRAKOVA men the stars of intense concentration, and health and safety. e latter is critical, as BUCS duathlon the silent power of a speeding arrow could easily be lethal if you got in the way. e basics: never step for- ward of the fi ring line unless given Zuzana Strakova Beth Campbell and Matt the all clear, and never have an ar- Sports Correspondent Jones row in your bow except at the line. Sports Correspondents e rules are pretty simple. e Orienteering requires runners to get classic target of black, blue, red and round a series of points drawn on a Sunrise greeted over 70 Oxbridge stu- yellow concentric rings sits down map in as short a time as possible. e dents as they racked their bikes for the range, and the closer to the centre route in between the control points is start of Varsity Duathlon, which saw you strike, the more you score. I set for each person to decide. is year’s more entrants for the run/bike/run myself the target of landing three BUCS event took place in Leeds last event this year than ever before. Cam- successive arrows - the full contents weekend, with Cambridge fi nishing in bridge took the men’s Blues title with of my quiver, or rather my belt loop a creditable fourth place. Oxford winning the other events. - on the square piece of paper that With Sheffi eld and Edinburgh the In the Men’s opening race, only contains the actual target. is soon traditional favourites, Cambridge usu- a brave run from Cambridge’s Max proved to have been rather under- ally fi ght for third with Oxford and Jenkins kept up with Oxford’s domi- selling myself, because archery is Durham. nant pack. In the bike leg on the other a sport of narrow margins. It be- e weekend consisted of an indi- hand, CUTriC President Matt Jones comes relatively easy to get some- vidual race on Saturday and a relay on and fellow Light Blue Petros Giannaros where near the target, but very hard Sunday, with results from both days picked off Dark Blue rivals. Jones and consistently to fi nd the centre. e added up to give an overall winner. For Giannaros entered the fi nal run just wonky sight on my bow (so said the purposes of scoring between uni- seconds apart, with Giannaros leading my knowledgeable friend) didn’t versities, the fi rst three best women/ the race. Jenkins then powered past help me, but nor did my wayward men individual runners, and the best Jones, with a Dark Blue shadow in the newbie’s technique. e draw and women’s and men’s relay teams, are shape of James Felce. release are highly technical, requir- counted. e stage was set for a dramatic and ing a precise honing and memory of e individual day was held at Ilkley even comic fi nish. Felce fi rst reeled in repeated muscle action. It’s a sport Moor, an area of craggy, open moor- Jenkins, then Giannaros before opening that rewards dedicated practice. land close to Leeds which demands in- his lead and gunning back to the start Perhaps the best thing about the telligent reading of the contours, plus line. Unfortunately for him, the start sport for the beginner is its innate physical fi tness for the hills. 14 run- Carrie Beadle handing over to Andrea Stefkova line was a turn away from the fi nisher’s quietness. e lack of noise is what ners from the fl atlands of Cambridge tunnel. Before Felce could rectify his I most remember; in sharp contrast stepped up. e planners had laid out points, 16 points more than Oxford but the considerable strength of their error, Giannaros had taken fi rst. Felce to gun shooting, there is virtu- an extremely tough course, adding fi ne (the lower score wins). Oxford rivals meant hopes of beating settled for silver whilst Jenkins came ally none. e senior Blues archers map-reading and astute choice of route e relay on Sunday proved to be the Dark Blues overall gradually dis- third. Oxford’s squad depth saw them to my right fi re off shot after shot to the skills required. the decisive point for Cambridge. For sipated. Cambridge did however put clinch the Men’s Mob Match title. from their hi-tech bows with an al- Cambridge stood in 5th position after Durham, in third position but lack- enough pressure on Durham to take e Women’s race was a battle for most sinister silence. More so than the fi rst day, just beaten by Oxford. For ing a competitive men’s team, it was 4th place, a creditable placing out of 25 second place. Despite some great cy- in other individual sports, you feel the men, Matthew Vokes fi nished fi rst going to be a question of hanging on. competing universities. cling from Cambridge and a strong fi - yourself competing against yourself from CUOC in 12th position, followed Cambridge focused on clawing back Boding well for the upcoming Varsity nal run from Light Blue Ursula Moore, and against the target, rather than by John Ockenden and Mark Salmon the defi cit against Oxford, making a event, however, Cambridge would have Oxford took overall victory based on a against others. It’s curiously both in 34th and 36th positions respectively. splendid start to the women’s relay with beaten Oxford in both the women’s runaway individual performance from an intense and a relaxing sport, and For the women, Carrie Beadle was in Carrie Beadle storming in to fi nish 1st, category and the men’s category had Sophia Saller, who fi nished more than a wonderful antidote to a stressful 11th position accompanied by Andrea handing over to Andrea Stefkova on the actual times counted rather than 8 minutes clear. Oxford then took a week. Stefkova and Jess Mason in 27th and second leg. the race positions. e Varsity races narrow 12 second victory in a close 28th. Overall, CUOC scored 148 e men’s team stayed in touch, take place in Sweden in April. fought women’s Mob Match. Sport Friday 28th February 2014 31 Look out for women’s rugby Ice hockey blues beat Cardiff Cambridge get the better Brassard joined in on the scoring along with another from Gagnon whose Captain Jess Gurney tells of Redhawks for the stickhandling mesmerised the Cardiff Varsity about raising the CUWRUFC second time defense. Period two wound to a close profi le of women’s rugby with Cambridge up 12 – 5. Jaason Geerts In the third period, the men in Light Blue tightened up their defence despite Richard Stockwell Sports correspondent penalty trouble, and simply wore down Rugby correspondent the valiant Redhawks. Excellent play by e men’s Light Blue ice hockey team Cambridge goaltender Mike Kang kept Jess Gurney, captain of Cambridge journeyed to Wales on Saturday night Cardiff to just one goal in the period, University Women’s Rugby Team, is an to beat the Cardiff Redhawks 24-6. is while the Light Blues’ snipers added experienced player herself, but the vast was the second game against the Red- freely to the lead, with Kroshus (4), majority of her 40 regular squad mem- hawks within two weeks, Cambridge Gagnon (3), Brassard, Ben McDonald, bers were complete beginners on arriv- having won the fi rst exchange 22-4. Oscar Wilsby, and captain Jaason ing in Cambridge. Nonetheless, partic- Cambridge opened, as British Geerts all getting on the scoresheet. ipation and enjoyment are certainly on Universities Ice Hockey Association Despite the late landslide of goals the rise: “ ere are so many girls that (BUIHA) leading scorer Eric Kroshus that hit them, Cardiff played hard un- come to Uni having never played be- The women’s squad celebrate their win over Chichester rounded the goaltender to score. til the fi nal whistle, especially their fore and leave saying they don’t know However Cardiff fi red right back with a how they ever lived without it.” had a promising season so far, winning there is an awful lot to be done before hard shot from the high slot that found Despite the initial inexperience of 13 of 16 matches, reaching second place we reach that.” the back of the net. e Light Blues many players, women’s rugby is as in both leagues. League competition e profi le of the Women’s Varsity stepped up the off ense, with Kroshus, “DESPITE SOME SLOPPY much a lifestyle choice as any oth- gives the season a diff erent dynamic to Match is a key target. Rowing will set Julien Gagnon, and Kyle Oskvig netting er university-level sport. With two the men’s season, which is centred on an example from next year, when the six unanswered goals between them to DEFENDING, CAMBRIDGE matches per week, in addition to train- the Varsity Match in December. For the women’s Boat Race will take place end the fi rst period 7-1. men, “the season is all about Varsity,” over the same course and on the same Redhawks, a solid side who have PRESSURED THROUGHOUT” whereas for the women, Varsity “is just day as the Men’s. For rugby, “the cur- tied Warwick and held the mighty another match that we should be just rent aim is for the women to play at London Dragons to a narrow margin “IF WE WANT TO QUALIFY as hungry to win as the rest.” Twickenham by 2017.” this season, did not defl ate but came goaltenders who together faced over Moreover, Women’s Rugby is a con- is year’s Varsity Match is away out for the second period fi ring. eir 75 shots. As always, they proved gen- FOR OUR BLUE, WE HAVE TO ditional full blue sport. is means on Saturday 8th March. Cambridge leading scorer was left alone up front, tlemen on and off the ice. Excellent ACHIEVE CONSISTENTLY” that in addition to participating in the have lost the last two women’s Varsity and beat the Cambridge goaltender in performances on the Cambridge side Varsity match, the team must win their matches, but it is diffi cult to determine the fi rst minute of the second period. were had by Player of the Match Julien BUCS division or reach the quarter- the favourite this year. Cambridge have However, Kroshus banked a cheeky Gagnon with seven goals and fi ve as- fi nals of the Cup. Every match counts: won 7 of 8 games in BUCS, while their goal from behind the net off the goalie sists, Eric Kroshus with 12 goals and ing, weights sessions and individual fi t- “If we want to qualify for our blue we opponents – playing in the league before Cambridge and Cardiff ex- four assists, Dave Brassard with two ness, most of the women have only one much achieve consistently.” above – have lost 7 of 10. e women’s changed goals, increasing the ledger goals, four assists, and one save, and day of rest per week. e women’s relationship with the team are running a supporters’ bus for to 9-3. Sloppy defence enabled the goaltender Mike Kang. e team compete in two league men “is a work in progress” after a the Varsity Match, which will depart Redhawks to pot two more goals in a Cambridge now face the London competitions: British Universities and merger at the start of this season. e Grange Road at 8.30am: “we hope to lively second period, but Cambridge Dragons in Peterborough on Saturday, Colleges Sport (BUCS) and Rugby men’s club has been accommodating have plenty of supporters to help us on maintained enough pressure to keep March 1. is will be the last match Football Union for Women. ey have so far, but “equality is the end goal and the way to a victory!” the margin out of reach. Winger David before the Varsity tussle on 8th March.

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University Centre, Granta Place, Mill Lane, Cambridge CB2 1RU 32 Friday 28th February 2014 Sport

Hard target Matt Worth tries out the silent but Sport deadly sport of archery

SPORT IN BRIEF DAVID TUDMAN DAVID

Lent Bumps So Far

Lent Bumps kicked off on the Cam on Tuesday with four divisions of men’s rowing and three divisions of women’s.  e competition is ef- fectively a ladder contest, in which College crews chase down and “bump” the boats ahead of them with the aim of leapfrogging them in the ladder.  e story of the fi rst two days of men’s competition was Caius’ top two boats losing their leadership of divisions one and two respectively, to Downing and Magdalene respec- tively. Men’s division  ree saw fi ve-place climbs from Darwin II and St. Cat’s II, who each achieved the coveted “overbump”.  e women’s races have so far been quieter, with Downing and Trinity maintaining their hold on the top two places in division one. Star performers of the opening stages were Clare, who gained three places in division one. Cambridge’s Julien Gagnon (r) finds the goal in the Blues’ away win over Cardiff Redhawks Pythons too much for Canterbury Rugby Roundup American footballers second frame, running-back Joe Moore the Canterbury endzone for 32-0. – leaving the score at 38-6. By this showed why he has been an MVP fi ve Otherwise, the early part of the third point in the game, Carr had established Cambridge women’s rugby union seal hold on playoff spot times this season as he darted into the was an inconclusive phase of play, dur- himself as the nemesis of the Chargers’ side have enjoyed a hugely suc- with 44-6 home win endzone for a 13-yard score.  e two ing which Pythons managed a fumble quarterback, picking him off again and cessful week. On Saturday the free- point attempt was no good, leaving on the Canterbury 1-yard line.  e returning the ball 28 yards. Cambridge scoring Light Blues defeated Sus- Jaason Geerts Cambridge ahead 14-0. A quick return Chargers were then able to claw back quarterback Aki Mulay took the reins sex 68-0 in the BUCS trophy Cup. of possession to Pythons saw another six points with their best attack of the and saw immediate results thanks to a Bryony Coombs, Sian McGuinness, American Football Correspondent running drive, which Yarwood himself afternoon. A run-pass combination lightning fast run by Joe Moore to the Helen Lambert, Steph Ledding- closed out with a touchdown from just followed by a 26-yard completion for 1 yard line, and a massive push by SJ to ton, Jess Gurney, Antonia Robbins,  e Cambridge Pythons played their 1 yard. Moore’s catch on the conver- muscle the ball over for a touchdown. Tia Knight and Katie Westlake all last home game of the season ear- sion racked up two more points for the  e Pythons were once more out of crossed for tries. lier this week against the Canterbury Pythons: 22-0. A defensive interlude luck on the two point try and found Almost immediately, on Chargers, taking a 44-6 victory to so- followed for the Light Blues. After go- “CAMBRIDGE ONCE AGAIN themselves leading 44-6.  ere was Wednesday, the team faced lidify their hold on a playoff berth. Py- ing four-and-out and suff ering a sack MADE THE MOST OF THEIR time for cornerback Jack Staff ord to their next Cup challenge against thons now stand second in the confer- by Cambridge’s rugby convert Sam add an interception of his own, shut- Chichester. A 22-9 victory saw the ence with a 6-1 record. Alderson, the Chargers switched to a POWER RUNNING GAME” ting down any last-winded Charger women move through to the semi- Cambridge’s strong defense, led by jumbo package, adding more size to comeback hopes. As Canterbury sur- fi nals of the competition. defensive captain Tom Carr, started the their backfi eld for what would be their prisingly elected to take to the air Also on Wednesday night, the game in fi ne form, forcing Canterbury last drive of the fi rst half. again, Peters snatched another ball out men’s Light Blues lost a lively game to go three-and-out on their fi rst drive. Cambridge continued to show de- a touchdown fi nally put the men of of the sky for a noteworthy return as 27-38 to invitational side Spoon’s With Canterbury resuming possession fensive meanness, however, with Tom Kent on the scoreboard.  eir conver- time expired without further score. Anti-Assassins, in what has become quickly after a Cambridge fumble, an Reynolds shutting down three con- sion failed, leaving the ledger at 32-6 Alex SJ was named Off ensive MVP an annual fi xture. Cambridge en- interception from Pythons defense- secutive Canterbury attacks and cor- Cambridge.  ereafter the Cambridge with 23 carries, more than 100 yards joyed plenty of competitive posses- man Guy Peters returned the ball 21 nerback Hao Yusei batting the fourth off ense continued to misfi re with a run, and two touchdowns. Special sion and exerted pressure, match- yards and introduced Cambridge’s play’s pass out of the air.  ere was time combination of penalties and incom- Teams MVP was Guy Peters and ing Spoon’s at 7-7 and 12-12 before off ense to the fi eld. Matching the de- left at the end of the second quarter for plete passes, and a punt away ended a Defensive MVP was Pete Campbell. mistakes and bad luck allowed their fense’s explosive start, Pythons’ fi rst of- Yarwood to switch to his passing game somewhat disappointing third quarter Joe Moore with 15 carries for 128 opponents to open up a lead later in fensive drive featured a dozen runs, led with spectacular eff ect.  e quarter- for the Pythons. yards and a touchdown, Tom Carr the second half. chiefl y by Alex SJ who burst through back threw passes to Carr for 17 yards Nine back-to-back runs early in the with 69 yards on the ground and two Finally, rugby Cuppers off ered for the game’s fi rst score. Quarterback and Moore for a 29 yard touchdown. fourth quarter pushed Canterbury fur- interceptions, and Joe Yarwood with a some midweek action on Tuesday, Joe Yarwood connected with Carr for James Stratford caught the two-point ther onto their heels, before Yarwood touchdown and three passing touch- with traditional powerhouses of the two point conversion. Cambridge conversion, giving Pythons a 30-0 lead sailed a pass over the Chargers’ defense downs also had outstanding games. the college game, St. John’s, beating closed the fi rst quarter 8-0 ahead. as the half came to a close. into the hands of Canadian wide re- Pythons now close out the regular Robinson 52-10 while Downing saw Cambridge’s power running has been Early in the third quarter, Pythons ceiver Jaason Geerts for a touchdown. seasons against Buckinghamshire New off Jesus 30-12. the heart of their off ensive strength Tom Reynolds and Brendan Loftus  e conversion was no good – a rela- University on 2nd March, before tak- this season, and in the fi rst play of the teamed up to cause a safety in tive Cambridge weakness this season ing on the playoff s.