Non Profit Org. Address Correction Requested U.S. Postage Return Postage Guaranteed PAID Permit 11278 Providence, RI

PUBLISHED BY THE KWAN UM SCHOOL VOLUME FOUR, NUMBER THREE 528 POUND ROAD, CUMBERLAND, RI (401) 769-6476' OCTOBER 1987

�'FfiE 1;Y.f,lOLE W.ORLP IS A �IlJ9fE, FLpry£R"-In late August 80 students representing these countries came up to express their understanding of the phrase, from the U.S. -and Europe gathered ill Korea to celebrate Seung '8ahri 's "l'he Whoie World IS-A Single Flower". In the evening there was a celebration of 60th birthday, an important milestone in Korean culture. The gathering (ncluded a the publication in Korean of a major biography of Z-en Master Seung Sahn, some, two-day event at Su Dok Sa. Temple, talks 'by visiting dignitaries Ven. 700 pages long and containing many photographs. The Kwan Um Zen School Mahaghosananda, Maezumi Roshi, Jakusho Kwong Roshi, and Ji Kwang Poep Sa presented gifts, a hand-sewn quilt and a carved plaque. Following the ceremonies, . Nim, and a kido in a building under construction forfuture international Kyol Che s about 70 people went on a.week-long tour of major , a trip Several later over 2000 monks and nuns made their warmth and The 1988 issue . (meditation retreats). days laypeople, special by extraordinary hospitality. February ', gathered at the Hyatt Hotel in downtown Seoul to meet at the International Young of PRIMARY POINT will include a full report and photographs of these events. Buddhists Symposium. As flags of many countries decora�e¢ the stage, people Photo by Paul Best INDEX YOU ARE DYING SOMETIME WE WILL ALL AND DIE ALREADY HOME An account of the "Conscious. Living, Conscious Dying" By Master Teacher Robert Moore � WORLD

workshop In December 1986 in a ceremony at the Providence Zen Center, Robert Moore was By Elien Anthony 3 recognized by Zen Master Seung Sahn as a Master Dharma Teacher in the Kwan Um PEACE Zen School. Bob' is, the seventh American Zen student to be named as an MDT, which is to "sensei" in the tradition. SPECIAL PHOTO equivalent Japanese Following the Certification The Conference on Assembly, it is traditional for the new teacher to give a formal Dharma speech. FEATURE . Bob, a Texas-born composer and martial arts teacher, has been a student of Soen "Conscious Living, Sa Nim's 12 Married and the three he teaches On the 5th Annual School for years. father of children, music at the University of Southern California in Los Angeles and is a Tai Chi instructor at Conscious and Soen Sa Nim's Dying" Congress the Aikido Ai Dojo in Whittier, where he leads a Zen group. He is also the resident . Sid 60th Birthday Celebration teacher at Dharma Sah Zen Center in Los Angeles. A former music professor at Yale By Kemp and Oberlin, he was a co-founder of the New Haven Zen Center ...... 4· (SL): A fellow has a heart attack, a heart fibrillation. His friends (Bob holds the ceremonial Zen stick above introduce us to Soen Sa 'Nim. We invited "MAY OUR BODIES reach out to him in fear. Touchinghis mo­ his head, and then brings it down for a hard Soen Sa Nim to give a talk at Yale Universi­ ment in "What BECOME A PRAYER­ conflict, they say urgently, � hit on .the altar table in front of him) ty that fall. After becoming acquainted should we do, what should we do?" STICK FOR THE WORLD" About one thousand. years ago a monk with Soen Sa Nim, through shenanigans of He answers, "No heart is came to Sahn Shou-Ch'u Zen Master one sort or another which I never totally problem. My The re- Tung engaged only singing." This is a diseased heart. But and asked, what is Buddha? Tung Sahn re­ understood, we then decided to take the treat artists 'at , this is a healed heart, if ever I've seen one. for Ojai ( plied, three pounds of flax. (Bob hits the . [first five lay precepts of No conflict. Having a heart attack, I stop By Ellen Sidor..... u ••• 8 table a second time) Buddhism] It was exactly 12 years ago the A few decades earlier a monk that the five New Haven war. approach­ tonight original i Soen Sa Nim (SSN): When your mind is ed Yun Men Zen Master, who was Tung' students came here. We drew straws to see /. like clear that's Zen mind. Good \ Sahn's and what is Buddha? who would the from our water, A CELEBRATION OF teacher, asked, give \1 then mind. then '" Yun Men shit on a stick. those there were about thinking, good Suffering, � . replied, dry (Bob group (in days only- � IN , WOMEN BUDDHIST plain mind. Thinking appears, then your hits the table a third time) four Zen Centers), and I got the short \1 PRACTICE mind is changing. No thinking, then no Tung Sahn Zen Master said, three straw .: � mind. Then your mind, Buddha. The Berkeley pounds of flax. Yun Men Zen Master said; I'm used to lecturing, so I worked very my mind, �1 gathering Christ. mind are all the same clear shit on a stick. So I ask what is the hard and had a 3D-minute talk all mind, 'dry you, prepared, . By Julie Wester ll Zen mind. real Buddha? with a long story to tell. In those days Soen A thousand there was a (loud shout) Hoh! Sa Nim used a moktak [wooden ·clapper] years ago, for the end of famous Zen temple on Diamond Mountain, READING MATTERS I see before me many smiling faces. signaling your talk time. I got I in Korea. On a mountain there 'was Twelve and a half years ago three of us up to give my talk, started in and got about nearby A new book review column a temple called Mu Jeung-Sa. Five made a trip here to Providence from New two minutes into it when-tok! So I Sid 13 a Continued on 2 By Kemp Haven to talk with monk who wished to Continued on page 10 page

. , 2 pRIMARYpOINT OCTOBER 1987 CONSCIOUS LIVING, CONSCIOUS DYING Continued 1 from page Conference with Zen Master Seung Sahn and 'Stephen Levine hundred monks lived at the Zen temple. Be­ may even notice the curl of the heat around

III lutt: .1111/(' 11J87. .111111(' /3() at tlu: Providcnc« /ell Center a tween the was a wonderful hot Ilell/lle gllfhaet/ [or thc kettle that touches the hand. You may two, there. " cntitlet/ "( ·1I1I.ICill//.1 I. iI'illg. ('111/.1 citrus I)ying let/ 11.1' /ell .\I(I.ller Sel/lIg spring with hot tubs. All Korea was Bud­ (,Oll./L'I'('IIC(' notice as millisecond of that fear of being Sahn (II/(I l.evinc. n ationullv h 1111 'I'll autltor ,," '//11 Dies?" The 111'11 leach­ dhist then, so Zen monks and sutra monks Slephell IIf burned. But it's all in a flow, one thing af­ ('1',\' hilt! 1/('1'('1' met 11111 were u» 11I1I'art/.1 each other as 111'0 could all come for free. So the monks were bcfot:«. IllIich'y uffcctionun: ter another. That is "Just doing it." brothers. 11'111'1' a tluu th« their IIe­ very Together tlicv lapl'.l1l'r helpet! purticipttnts explore happy. it" to do that 111/(1 attitudes (lIIOI/{ 11/111 introduccd torms otmcditation nndrelax­ To "just do is thing only, One the most famous sutra monk in Iiets dving, They day, to live a breath at a to be arion that lire oriented WIt'III'l/.1 /II tension 1I11t! he completely time, Korea came from Mu to the /tel,lillg rclcus« .I'illlll!.l· present, Jeung-Sa in the moment to moment, 'I'a,\' in Zen wholly present present. baths. This monk already had a problem: , Stephen Levine particularly helpful introducing Suhn 1I11t! tlu: hi» 1I/1l1 10 those who had "I am a sutra monk. I have authentic Bud­ .\ltl.H('I'Sl'/lIIg mrunint; of 111'l!l'fi('£' tcuchin; The hand retracts from the pot. Feel the 1It11 met him before. S1I1II1' tlu: s luul recent ericn Cl'.I· or which .dha-speech and Buddha-action." One day, of nurticipunt eX11 jobs muscles as they contract and expand. Feel­ rill' ;.1'.\'111'. or dcutl: 10 tlu: their lives. but went he comes down to take a hot bath. It was a hrought lil/·e.�rollllt! III' tlu: contcrencc ing the sensation of this moment, -in this those 10 look at not how we die and bill also death, . very good feeling, very clear. 'So. when he is far beyond particulars only face body, making a cup of tea. Not waiting for how ...(' live Will/ill',' 11'1' can. he ilion' 1111'111'1' ill the 1I'0r/cI. 'ready to leave; he goes to 'the woman who the rea to boil; just making a cup of tea. Sit­ /.('11 ,\lII.Hel' Suhn is tlu: 781/t t'utriarct; otthc Korean Order 1If1t! I runs the baths, and says, "Oh, thank you Se/lllg ('ltll�re [irs ting down, feeling your buttocks on the Koreun /.ell \l1I.Her W lire 1I11t! teach ill lite" Sinc« ';I',he l 'nited very.much, Your hot tub is very wonderful, est, coming '.,';1111'.1' chair, .your feet on the floor, your arm on ;11 iIJ7!. he the I'rovidcnc« Zen ('ellli'1' 1I11t! 01'1'1' 5() and ·the best in the world." husfoundcd affiliated groilps the table. Just si.tting. Not someone in a

{·('III('I'.\· ;11 lite {·.S.. CWIlIt!((,.'lI'll�il, WIt! Korea, which lite "'11'1111 The owner said, "Thank' you very 1-.'/I/'(l/le compris« room, in a male or female body, waiting for l.·111 /('11 Sduwl. I Ie 11'II1·1'/.1 worldwide t Zen, 1I/1l1 much." cuchhu; IlI'illgillg peopl« Illgellter a cup of camomile or jasmine. Just being international work, "Nowadays, do many monks come in for pcac« experienced, unfolding from moment to l.evine i.1 II 1I11t! teacher 1Il;'iollollllr kilo 11'11 his '1'01'1. with here?" SI('"h('1l [ather, floel, [or moment. You can hear the bubbles starting the ill. l I« ha« -wort.o«! cvtcn vivcl v with rli.I'lI';el/t "'/lIIier-NII\'.\ and N((III "Yes, both Zen monks and sutra monks 1('I'III;IIl(!ly to form in the kettle. Maybe you can smell /)1l.1'.\·. lI'ilh his Undrca, tu: 1(,1It!1 wit! (,1I1I.I'III{.\' with II number come here. Do you meditate?" II'UL',' ,rein'lItl /;1' the water as it just begins to boil. All there and mcditat ill 'he I ·.S. 1I11t! CIIIIlIlIli. "Yes, we meditate at .the sutra temple. �htl.lpillli. hospice unigroun» is, all there ever will be, is here, moment to We also study and have dharma com- moment. No conflict, no waiting, just be­ , ,bat.�' ing. You hear the tea. Ah, a moment of woman Then the said.v'Masier , I have .� satisfaction. " V) .questiori." , "What kind of question do you have?" � Standing, noticing before you stand, the. "I want to understand the dharma." � intention to stand. What a miracle! Not kind of ask "Okay. Any question, me." c drawn, not driven, not automatic, not com­ (I am a sutra master.) e:) pulsive, not mechanical. Noticing that the "Okay, my question is: You just took a � mind produces intention before every ac­ hot bath; so your body is very clean. You � tion. What an exquisite opportunity to un­ clean your body in the hot tub. Where do ct lock the ancient cornpulsivity, to take con- you clean your mind?" scious birth, at last; instead of compulsively That's the point. Your body is cleaned in falling through our lives. Hand touches the the hot tub. Where do you clean your kettle. Ah, the heat. The feeling of weight. mind? If you clean your mind, then no pro­ Feeling it. Feeling it. The muscles doing blem. Every day you use your min-d, think­ their job. A miracle of body, of mind, of ing: "I like that. I don't like that. Here is heart. Walking back to the table, hearing good. Here is bad. I go over there. Oh sound of your feet on the floor, feeling life, wonderful. I'm not so good." You use your feet on the floor. The pot in hand. Water mind, and your mind becomes ,dirty. So, pouring. The fragrance, that first millisec­ is: You all clean in ond of the fragrance of the. tea as it touches my question your.bodies "

.. the shower every day. How do you clean )yoU.I>!1QSl�.j) .. And therush 6F conditioning "_ -tha ii your mind every day? iR(fels , liking, disliking, expectation,

'. Don't know? . happiness, unhappiness. Your whole life is

. �.,' If you doi1'i have a �ii1d,:clean'ing'it is in that millisecond. Just do it. Each mo- not necessary. But if you have a mind, you ment. One thing at a time. must clean it! How do. you clean your No weren't drinking the tea in our minds .:-;" I' ing. thinking is clear like space. That is . was we weren't Whisk in the cup. That · mind? before it Where im­ whisk-whip, substance: clear like space means tlear like ready? If are at the same time? .whip, whip, whip, whip-against the side you always ch��,!(,i�g·,. checking, a mirror: Red comes, red. White comes, patiently doing.five things of the the Not you have a Don't Conflict is in the mind. cup. "Not listening to radio. .checking, .problern, white. The.s!

. across the sensations probiem for him. When he his last know." If you keep this don't-know mind bumper sticker. But what does it mean to Walking floor, <;Ire died, a in the feet. is breath just left. He didn't grasp for the next , 100%, then already thinking is cut off, make cup of green tea that stops the war'? generated Expectation maybe, in the mind. Over to the stove. You hear the breath. It went out, and he went with it. there is no thinking. No thinking means I mean, have we ever made a cup of green No No conflict. No one empty mind. Empty mind is before think- tea that didn't continue the war? Where we pop o� the gas; perhaps, as it ignites. You problem. dying. OCTOBER 1987 pRIMARYpOINT-��__""'--'------3 FIRST QUESTIONER: I have difficulty mind reaches out, says "Give me a solu­ "just doing it" sounds like there is no connecting the inner work toward be­ tion," but the mind is the problem. thinking, and no consciousness. Is there a coming peaceful as an individual and the FIRST QUESTIONER: I'm not happy difference? work on the larger level, for world peace. I with your answer. SL: Most of our life is an afterthought. don't quite see the connection or the move­ SL: The mind is not happy with not get­ We're hardly here, we're hardly born, we're

. ment from one to the other. ting what it wants. The mind is at war. hardly present. We're thinking ourselves SSN: I only ask you: What are you doing walking down the path in.the woods:We're now? thinking ourselves seeing a rose, but we're SL: It isn't the people that make war, it's FIRST QUESTIONER: I am feeling sad. not smelling, we're not walking. There's the state of mind. It's greed, it's fear, it's now. not the crunch of gravel, there's not the it's distrust. How can we end the war anger, SSN: Sad. What kind of sad? miracle of nature around. We are someone when these are still within us? Internal work FIRST QUESTIONER: Because I did inside a shell, .peering out through thought may seem like it's not enough. "But that's not get the answer I was looking for. as a protective mechanism, not allowing the "not enough" mind speaking, just do , SSN: Sad is part of it, it is your feeling. ourselves to die into the' moment, to just be it, and then see what happens. See how What are you doing, what is your body po­ there. To just do it, is to just he. much more intuitive you are:" See how much sition, and how are you feeling. Usually we're thinking our lives, instead more are present you .. What ends. war? FIRST QUESTIONER: I am sitting here, of just being. What we are describing may Going beyond the conflicted mind and feeling sad. sound like another self-conscious process opening' into your heart. Compassion ends SSN: All right. Just do it. If you're sad which is, only going to cause more pro­ war. Caring ends war. 100OZo, then there is no "I." When you blems. But when you are moment to mo­ People' marched with peace signs in the asked your question, you said "I" feel this ment meeting with a merciful awareness, sixties. "Stop burning the children' in' the way, and "I" don't see that. This "I" has a the senses; the experience-once you get in­ jungles of Vietnam." That was a good in­ problem. The "I" makes my opinion, my side that experienCe-you see that the fear tention, wanting the end of suffering. But condition, my situation. If you put down of. being overly, self-conscious ·is. only ano­ did they stop the war .in the name of peace? your opinion, your condition, and your sit­ ther thought about the experience. Inside of thousand American men and Fifty-three . then is .no it, it is not that. It is not self-consciousness. uation, everything problem.'. women were killed in Vietnam during the Where does sadness appear? It is instead more consciousness of ·self. , , Vietnam War. A few hundred thousand FIRST QUESTIONER: I don't know. Only the mind confuses it. The experience iii _ men and' women returned. Many were met . SSN: You are holding "my opinion, my not confusing at all. by people with peace signs who spit on understanding." If you have too much un­ One even gets so that the watcher is no­ rhern, who called them baby killers, who re� derstanding, then you have a problem. You ticed as just another object floating in the viled them. These people held signs saying, must digest. your understanding.r-then wis­ vast spaciousness of awareness. There is no "Make Peace, Not War," but they burned dom appears. Then with wisdom, if this watcher, just a watching. Because, as long ';: QUESTioNER:'. killed themselves. Were they met by peace? ,'_ I find your treasure? The word "peace" is nothing if there is 'an­ SSN: WHO ARE YOU? That's all. there ger in the mind. feeling. is confusion. I hope everybody goes inside, inside, There are two kinds of sadness. I don't know. how we can make peace un­ "My" In fact, as long as there's a point of view, inside, until inside ,and outside disappear. sadness is me sad. there's war. .til we can just make a cup of tea, and meet only my opinion making The inside and outside become one, and when someone sees and the conflict and the confusion within our­ But suffering says, THIRD QUESTIONER: I tend to w.orry you find your treasure. I hope everybody then is a selves with mercy. Without the heart-cen­ "That's very sad," that Bodhisattva lot about the world situation, about fa­ finds their treasure, gets enlightenment,.

tered without tile lack of conflict sadness. Keeping your direction clear every mine, about nuclear war.' I was struck by and helps all beings . Thank you. peace, / If all within, it is impossible to stop the war. The day is very important. '.'help beings" your comment, Stephen, thatgivingup suf­ SL: In away, the wars outside ourselves

. is your direction, then, and feeling-happi­ fering is the hardest thing we will ever do. I are a mirror, an opportunity to 'See the war ness, suffering, sadness=-any 'feeling is no don't know why, but I keep feeling as much that has been going on inside us forever, the problem.. . suffering as possible. And I was wondering, , war between the mind and the heart. Let us I , ,;;' Once a had a .child mother child: That 'how do I overcome his resistence? . _" stop ,the war. '0 was very sick. The child doesn't understand 1

ize stillness. Visualize the distress 'before Ellen old friend I'd never met, which is not unlike there: to be with this tired old critter for an By Anthony " and let it arise. Let it float. dying. afternoon while his mom ran errands. In you go Soften. As meet it will Some participants that I talked with that moment I realized I was already at the you your distress mercifully, dissolve; as all things do. Resistance invites couldn't recall having a "reason". for at­ conference on dying and that I had a choice it to makes it more intense." The weekend of "Conscious' tending the weekend; But many of us. work to be angry with my friend or to be present 'stay, . One-man who was of ALS Living/Conscious Dying'; with Stephen in hospice or with people with AIDS or to this dog. So I knelt down by Pretzels and dying (Amyo­ Lateral Sclerosis, Lou Levine and Soen Sa Nim (Zen Master Seung have had' the experience of visiting a friend stroked' his whispy face hairs. When my trophic Gehrig'sdis­ talked about the of was I am not used to sit­ or relative who is Some knew friend came home I her ease) .grief losing every­ Sahn) very: special. dying. people hugged good-bye. - . one at once and some of ting still on a cushion and just listening for Stephen. from his· wonderful books, Wh9 "Late" became "ample.':' lingering feelings about his brothers. two but one hundred and of us A Gradual on' The next "There is no disappointment days, -. thirty Dies, Awakening, Meetings day Stephen said, business means did just that. '. the Edge, and Grist for the Mill (with' Ram such thing as 'waiting patiently.' Only Stephen said, "Finishing not for someone else to "Pain is not suffering. Resistance to pain' Dass). Others had read Bone of Space and 'waiting' or 'patie·nt.''' Over and over dur­ waiting respond. Not and Not to wait for is suffering. In these next days maybe we Only Don"t Know by Soen' Sa Nim and ing the weekend, I heard just what I needed give take, just give. them to respond to it-then you have unfin­ can open to our own pain ... touch with wanted the rare privilege of sitting with to hear from Stephen, Soen Sa Nim and

ished business, .. Just send mercy and kindness that which has been him. other participants. forgiveness, give, �

. touched with fear," Stephen said. I hope I can give you the flavor of the' just give." "l' am one of those people who is always Meditations on the "Some day we are all dying ... Nobody weekend by relating it to my own situation. forgiveness, "ahnhh" the room,'.' said a woman and SOFT BELLY were guarantees your life. So to When I was getting ready to leave for the busy rearranging breath, moment " 'lNh'o had been' visiting a dying friend, our and moment you die," said Soen Sa Nim. conference on Friday night; my friend was interspersed throughout questions "because the is too hard." answers. I with a Much of the time, Stephen and Soen Sa late returning my car. I began to feel hot and pain paired up massage .if do were in mind "Wliat happens you nothing?" therapisrto ream "co-breathing." He lay Nim dialogue with each other 'and restless, my around, ."Where . darting ' asked on the floor face I watched his with us, back and forth, telling stories, jok-. is she? What can she be doing? This always Stephen. 'up. " "It's very sheanswered. abdomen as he I breathed out ing listening to our stories, sharing 'their happens ... I was about to' escalate to just painful," and, exhaled, "Is 'Or' course, the sound of let­ spirit in the large meditation hall. "Doesn't she respect my time?" when I 'just very painful' 'okay? audibly "ahhhhh," great the to rescue is common. So "Ahhh" allows release. Co- When Soen Sa Nim introduced Stephen looked at her dog, whom I was dog-sitting tendency very ting go. energy some small first. Start with little is one to be with who as the more famous one, Stephen laughed .because he was near death, and saw his' try pains '-''breathing way people

moments confusion... an'd build are restless or.in coma or near death.' warmly and said, "I had .the feeling about brown and white fur heaving out. and back, ofdistrust,

on ... Before Soen Sa Nim that lwas about to be with an out and back. I remembered why I was your capacity you visit,' visual- Continued on page 16

. ,. 16 pRIMARypOINT ------OC-T-OB-E-R-19-87

, angry preferences, like and dislike, trying 10 laughed, recognizing our own mind­ SOME DAY ARE ALL ,,, WE DYING 'gel it. rnanipulat ions. '-- Continued from page 3 In my relationships I often don't let feel­ "Whcn you arc thinking, then your mind rise and rise and I hold on and mind arc different. But when we knees a little as I walked and breathed lower ings pass, pass. my One of the most helpful ideas for me was to them. I want to control other don't thcn we have same down. I attention to his feet maneuver­ myself, 'know, mind, SOFT BELLY. "The belly. Very paid the brick people, my feelings, theirs. So now I ask my empty mind, before thinking. Stillness, important," Stephen said. "Much tension ing walk, grass, flagstones, planks to ... 'Be still and go sof't , let all rising and pass emptiness. silence know that of deck. I saw how careful he was, how pre­ belly falling in the belly. We can use it as a diagnostic ' I am God ... If 'don't then he his foot to lift at each rise through. you say know,' for how present we are. If we keep coming cisely prepared One man who was with AIDS arc the universe is of the brick walk. And I realized that he diagnosed you universe, you."- back to soft belly, we can tell the ground, "I have found and Some of us took the to sit or not fall and I or said, people agencies opportunity degree of our presence by hard belly." might might might might who are very to me die. I've in the early morning and not catch him. Don't know. But at least my willing help evening. been fortunate that I've also found some What a privilege to sit with others and to I had been HARD BELLY with a friend arms would no longer surround him with who are willing to help me liv e. What have chant in that full-bodied', no-room-to-think of mine who has AIDS. I would get scared my anxious tension. I began to enjoy walk­ seen in who their way. that he would fall down or scared that he with him. I to notice the you people go beyond , ing began poppies " "There is nothing you can do for your­ would insist on walking beyond his capacity and sweet peas near his ankles. And later diagnosis? Stephen with a story of a very self that will give you what a daily medita­ and collapse or that he would be angry and on, when I rubbed his back with lotion, I responded hard businesswoman who was tion practice can give you," Stephen said. hostile toward me because he was tired of felt his skin under my hand, the fine texture belly dying of cancer and alienating everyone around "I I' you only meditate when you feel like it, all the "helpers." All of these things had of it, the bones underneath. I felt less separ­ her by judging and blaming. "After six then all you see is the 'feel like it' mind. happened before. So, two days after the ation-- his back, my hand, his breathing, weeks in the she couldn't stand it You can't just do it when you feel like i!. conference, I was walking next to him and mine, comfort, time passing. hospital anymore ... She let herself i�to the Then you lose the opportunity to bring into he was unsteady on his feet. I touched the Stephen said, "It isn't that we don't have drop pain. All of a sudden she her­ balance the 'feel like it' mind and 'not feel back of his.waist to support him. He didn't feelings, but not to be afraid of our feel­ experienced self as a black Biafran woman on her side in like it' mind." like it. He took my hand away. I got afraid. ings. Let them pass through. 'Don't know" a hut a child. She I had sat at the Providence Zen Center He had already fallen that morning. Then I is soft belly. 'Don't know' is receiving heal­ nursing dying experienced 'herself as an Eskimo woman of for two last winter and had remembered. SOFT BELLY. I bent my ing. Hard belly is 'can't let healing happen,' dying days difficulty starvation with great pain in her back. She with the chanting--too demanding, foreign experienced herself as an Asian woman sounds, 100 long sitting, not enough breath

crushed by a rock ... Finally she said, 'I ex­ in me. But I was told to do it anyway, "This Sixtieth tribute book for Soen Sa Nim nOli" available, Birthday perienced the ten thousand beings suffering is not a spectator sport!" This time, I really Only DOing It for Sixty Years - Celebrating the Sixtieth Birthday at the same moment. It changed from being heard Soen Sa Nim when he said, "You can of Zen Master Seung Sahn my pain to the pain.', In the next six do anything. The choice is: I can or I can­ months,. her room became the center of not. Don't check, moment to moment, and and edited Diana Clark compiled by mercy. Everyone came to her room ... ButI you can do anything." So I got into it. I don't know what is anymore. I blasted out my of Korean and healing . syllables from Soen Sa Nim's friends and .students all over the Tributes, stories, poems many don't know," thoroughly enjoyed not having room. to world, plus ashort history of his life. think. I have to admit that I did not understand the most moment 236 pages, dozens of photographs, $10.00 (private printing) all of Soen Sa Nim's weirds, but it didn't Perhaps touching for me was Soen Sa Nim's to the maucr. "Don't to response ques­ Shipping costs: $1.25 per copy. Overseas: surface $2.00; airmail $4.00 really try understand," tion, "Do you have he said. "Just do it! ... Someone hungry, suffering?" "If have I have My check for $ is enclosed. Allow 3-5 weeks for delivery. Iced them. Someone dying, comfort them. you suffering, suffering. When your then I have no No outside, no inside. No no ob- suffering-is over, . subject, " Order from: Kwan Urn Zen School jeer. Just do it." suffering. 528 Pound Road then ended "Let Socn Sa Nim gave us several very animat­ Stephen with, yourself

... die ... Iet all fall Cumberland, RI 02864 ed performances where he played all of the name., reputation solidity away. Let come, like ice cube melt­ roles in the story. "When child play out­ fluidity ing ... In our life, do one at a time. Name doors, fall down,' bleed, go play again. just thing That's the way to for death." O· Then the mother comes, sees the blood, prepare

says, 'Oh! blood! Child remembers ... much Address crying. Our mind makes everything!" He Ellen Anthony is a writer, artist and former flung his arms around wildly as the child TVproducer living on' Cape Cod. A Quaker she works _ Zen ______Zip playing, drew his eyebrows up in a horrified and student of Buddhism, expression as t hc mother, then heaved great with the Provincetown AIDS Support sobs as the wailing child. We laughed and Group.

ORDER FORM ten Please send me the following number of copies: qates ____Ten Gates ($7.95) Shipping cost: $1.25 per copy Only Don't Know ($7.95)' The Kong-An Teaching of -;-- Overseas: surface $2.00

_____ of ZEN MASTER SEONG SAHN Gathering Spirit ($6.95) airmail $4.50

In this n-rnark ablc honk, a brillinnt contcmpor arv Zen �1aster dcruonsr rntes hi, simplified appruach ttl kong-uris and return:' virulirv, humor and clnritv [0 this vastlv misundcrsroo.] tcuc hing rcch niquc. Ten kong-ans, culled (rlll11 a collection of i ,jl\ h''''l' lvccn ,ek-cted anJ il­ check for $ is enclosed. lusrrnrcd througb Zen Master Scung Salin's \\'llrld"'iJe correspondence "'ith students. My 13LJ pages, 12 phorogruphs. 5,.l)) ISf))'.; ll-l).j2'l)j-OI-6

For Ten Gates and A Gathering Of Spirit only: On orders of 3 to 10 copies of either book, there is a 10070 discount off the list -A Gathering of Spirit price and a reduced shipping charge of $.75 per book. Women Teaching in American Buddhism .. Allow 3·5 weeks for delivery.

Edited by Ellen S. Sidor lVame �------�------

Address -,-- _

The authentic voice of women vibrantly connected with spiritual practice and daily life. �______Zip------Includes Bhikshuni Ane Perna Chadron; Ruth Denison; Maurine M\,n-O;, Frccdgood, Roshi, Gesshin Prabhasa Dharma, Roshi: Dr. Joanna Macv; jacqueline Schwarrc Mundell, Toni Packer; Barbara Rhodes, Master Dharma Teacher: and Jan Chozcn Soule, Sensei. Plus panel discussions and a list of 50 recommended hooks. We accept payment by check or money order drawn only on a 86 pages, 23 photographes, $6.95 ISBN 0-942795-00-8 U.S. bank. Canadian and over:seas customers: please send Ca­ nadian Postal Money Orders in U.S. dollars, International Postal Money Orders, or bank checks payable on any U.S. bank or banker's agency. Make checks payable to: Also available through Primary Point Press:

Dropping Ashes on the Buddha: The Teaching of Zen Master Seung Sahn A delightful, irreverent and often hilariou» rl'l'md of the cncounrcr« (If Zen �1aster Scunu 5,'\111 '1I1LI hi, Anwri,'l""1 ./...,J i students. Consisting of stories, formal Zt'n urvrvicws , Dhnrm» �I't'l'l'hl';-:, and the Z(.'11 \1;;;-:[l'r\ :,\'ontanl'l)ll:- intl'r:H.'· Primary tions with his students. (Grove Press. Il)76) S Ill.l)'i Point Only Don't Know-The Teaching Letters of Zen Master Seung Sahn A wlb·tilln of !ettl'r, [rom t1w l·ll,.­ Press respondence between Western students and Zel1 Muster Scunu Snhn, the first Korean Zen M",tLT to live al1d tl':!l'h in the Wes(. Contains a rich selection of letters rcprcscnrinp thl' full ral1J,:l' of human conccr ns=-nbout 111\T, n-lnrion­ 528 Pound Road ships, work, the response of a.brilliunr kt'l'l1-el'l'd Zen Master. (Four Seasons Foundation, 1l)021 S,.l)'i .. suffering-and Cumberland, RI 02864

,', j..