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Soul Journey: Rediscovering the Sacred Paths for Body, Heart, and Mind Christopher Fillingham [email protected]

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Soul Journey: Rediscovering the Sacred Paths for Body, Heart, and Mind Christopher Fillingham Cfillingham16@Georgefox.Edu Masthead Logo Digital Commons @ George Fox University Doctor of Ministry Theses and Dissertations 2-1-2019 Soul Journey: Rediscovering the Sacred Paths for Body, Heart, and Mind Christopher Fillingham [email protected] This research is a product of the Doctor of Ministry (DMin) program at George Fox University. Find out more about the program. Recommended Citation Fillingham, Christopher, "Soul Journey: Rediscovering the Sacred Paths for Body, Heart, and Mind" (2019). Doctor of Ministry. 319. https://digitalcommons.georgefox.edu/dmin/319 This Dissertation is brought to you for free and open access by the Theses and Dissertations at Digital Commons @ George Fox University. It has been accepted for inclusion in Doctor of Ministry by an authorized administrator of Digital Commons @ George Fox University. For more information, please contact [email protected]. GEORGE FOX UNIVERSITY SOUL JOURNEY: REDISCOVERING THE SACRED PATHS FOR BODY, HEART, AND MIND A DISSERTATION SUBMITTED TO THE FACULTY OF PORTLAND SEMINARY IN CANDIDACY FOR THE DEGREE OF DOCTOR OF MINISTRY BY CHRISTOPHER FILLINGHAM PORTLAND, OREGON FEBRUARY 2019 Portland Seminary George Fox University Portland, Oregon CERTIFICATE OF APPROVAL ________________________________ DMin Dissertation ________________________________ This is to certify that the DMin Dissertation of Christopher Fillingham has been approved by the Dissertation Committee on February 11, 2019 for the degree of Doctor of Ministry in Leadership and Spiritual Formation. Dissertation Committee: Primary Advisor: David Robinson, DMin Secondary Advisor: Carole Spencer, PhD Lead Mentor: MaryKate Morse, PhD All Scripture references, except those quoted by other authors within quotes, are from the New Revised Standard Version of the Bible. Copyright © 2019 by Christopher Fillingham All rights reserved ii DEDICATION To those who love the Church and those who have given up on the Church. To those communities and individuals who have guided my soul in their own way. And to my children, who need the Church to become all that it was created to be, so they might become all they were created to be: Noelle, Elijah, Theodore, and Brandt. May you discover the immensity of God’s life and love for you. iii ACKNOWLEDGMENTS This work has been stirring deep in my soul for a long time thanks to a pastor, mentor, and friend of mine, Burt Burleson. Not only did he help me discover my own calling in the way he lived out his calling, but Burt introduced me to contemplative Christianity and the gift of ancient guides. In the process, he may have just saved my soul. Since then, there have been a number of people who have nurtured the curious longing in me that gave birth to this work, including various spiritual directors, guides, and teachers: Doug Hardy, who first taught me to listen to my body; Paul Ritter, who encouraged me to take the leap into a D.Min; Belden Lane, whose Backpacking with the Saints cultivated my imagination and whose spirit made the spirit in me leap; Suzanne Stabile, who not only taught me the Enneagram and centers of intelligence, but taught me about myself and gave a great gift to my marriage; John Phillip Newell, whose pilgrimage and conversations on Iona in May 2018 continue to reverberate in my soul. I am also grateful to Portland Seminary, especially MaryKate Morse who listened to my muddled thoughts and spiritual questions, encouraged my writing, allowed the space for this work to find its own way into the world, and, most importantly, nourished my body, heart, and mind in the Leadership and Spiritual Formation program. I am indebted to my advisor, David Robinson, who helped me find my way through countless ancient voices and whose early feedback on Bonaventure sparked my idea for the framework of this dissertation. Special thanks to Rochelle Deans, whose edits, suggestions, and personal feedback were a gift. And to my LSF2 cohort, thank you for iv encouraging me to believe that I have something worth writing and for your life-giving friendships. Jason, Ken, and Mike, you have made the journey rich. I want to also offer my deepest gratitude to Dayspring Baptist Church in St. Louis who provided the time and resources to make this program possible. Thank you for your generosity, your encouragement, and your love. You are a delight to pastor. A special thanks to everyone who read chapters along the way and have been conversation partners, both at Dayspring and online: Jerry, Shirleen, Trisha, David, John, Margarette Ann, Dean, Gail, Jordan, Chuck, Aaron, Candice, Rob, Dad, and Mom. To my family, who have loved and supported me, who kept me honest, who cheered me on, and who made me laugh, thank you. And to my love, my journey companion, my first editor of every chapter, my conversation partner, my encourager— Jessi, without your hours of sacrifice and grace, none of this would have been written. You inspire my soul. v EPIGRAPH Thou art above us, O God. Thou art within. Thou art in every living thing, Yet contained by no thing. Teach us to seek Thee in all that has life, That we might see Thee as the light of life. Teach us to search for Thee in our own depths, That we might find Thee in every living soul. —John Phillip Newell, Iona Pilgrimage, May 2018. vi Table of Contents DEDICATION ...............................................................................................................iii ACKNOWLEDGMENTS .............................................................................................. iv EPIGRAPH .................................................................................................................... vi LIST OF FIGURES ......................................................................................................... x LIST OF TABLES .......................................................................................................... x ABSTRACT ................................................................................................................... xi CHAPTER 1: HERE WE GO AGAIN............................................................................ 1 We Are Lost .............................................................................................................. 1 What Are We Looking For? ....................................................................................... 6 Misconceptions About Spirituality ........................................................................... 6 Spirituality as Eros ................................................................................................... 8 Aim of our Eros ..................................................................................................... 11 Cultivating Eros ..................................................................................................... 14 Lost in the Weeds .................................................................................................... 15 The Fallacy of Knowledge ..................................................................................... 16 The Deception of Experiences ............................................................................... 18 The Rigidity of Behaviors ...................................................................................... 19 The Container or the Contents? .............................................................................. 20 Mirages: The Enlightenment and Rationalism .......................................................... 22 Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness? ........................................................... 22 The Reduction of Creation ..................................................................................... 24 The Reduction of Humanity ................................................................................... 25 The Reduction of God ............................................................................................ 26 Consequences for the Soul ..................................................................................... 27 In Search of Guides ................................................................................................. 28 CHAPTER 2: A SACRED MAP – BONAVENTURE AND THE THREE ESSENTIAL PATHS .......................................................................................................................... 31 Looking for Maps .................................................................................................... 31 Map-Maker Extraordinaire ...................................................................................... 32 The Seraphic Vision............................................................................................... 35 Map Key .................................................................................................................. 36 Wordplay: Itinerarium Mentis in Deum ................................................................. 37 Three Pairs of Wings—Three Contemplative Paths ................................................ 39 The Crucified One—One Central Road .................................................................. 40 Desire—The Essential Fuel .................................................................................... 41 The Three Paths ....................................................................................................... 42 The Outward Journey of Francis ............................................................................ 42 The Inward Journey of Augustine
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