O REGO N D AILY GAS LEAK NEAR CAMPUS HOUSING Workers accidentally puncture a gas line near Wild Duck Cafe Monday, leading the University to alert students about a potentially dangerous gas leak. Emerald DAILYEMERALD.COM new media with a history since 1900 dailyemerald . c o m vol. 113, issue 141 tuesday, may 8, 2012

ATHLETICS The Cost of Roses

alex mcdougall photo editor The Rose Bowl Stadium, one of the most famous in the world, just prior to sunset during Oregon’s 45-38 victory over Wisconsin Jan. 2, 2012. The Ducks’ trip cost the athletic department over $1.5 million to fund transportation, lodging and per diem for University officials, band, cheerleaders and others associated with the University. $220,107 $123,851 $43,480 Amount the athletic department spent Amount the athletic department spent Amount the athletic department spent on on transportation for 212 team and staff on transportation for the official party transportation for the 247 members of members for nine days of 56 people for seven days band and cheerleading for seven days

The costs associated with the Rose Bowl totaled just under $1.6 million, leading some to question its extravagance

sam stites a football game seems strange, but to these schools it’s only a President Dave Frohnmayer. news reporter fraction of what they reap. “The faculty and students on the Intercollegiate Athletics The numbers for the Ducks’ trip to Pasadena, Calif., may look Committee have spent the past year trying to get a straight an- owl season is a special time of the year. It caps off average, but broken down the equation is much more complex. swer from athletic director Rob Mullens on why he can’t afford every football season with fun matchups that fans The athletic department spent $220,107 on transportation to keep this promise, and now we know he blew the money rarely get to see and it allows those teams that have for the team and staff (212 people), but they spent $123,851 on on all-expenses-paid trips to the Rose Bowl,” Harbaugh said. B done well a chance to prove they’re the nation’s “If a Duck football player got benefits like these the NCAA transportation for the official party (56 people) and only $43,480 best. Bowl games are ingrained into the culture and tradition of for the band and cheerleaders (247 people). The team and staff infractions committee would ban them faster than the Black collegiate football, but the expenses to send teams to these spent 9 days traveling and the other two groups only spent 7, but Mamba’s kick-off return.” games recently has been anything but traditional. the expenses don’t equate between the groups. ASUO President Ben Eckstein and Vice President Katie Taylor The Ducks’ 45-38 Rose Bowl win over the Wisconsin Badgers The official party consists of athletic department officials, were both part of the official party that received all-expenses- was a crowning moment in Oregon football. It was a victory that representatives of the University’s third-party rights holder IMG, paid trips to see the Ducks play. Their names were among those ended a 95-year drought. It cost $1,599,307 to send 515 people and 6 students whose names were redacted from the list. It also redacted under the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act. — including team, staff, band, cheerleaders and athletic officials includes University administrators such as Lorraine Davis, who Eckstein and Taylor — selected through a student outreach — to southern California in order to obtain that win, well within has a clause in her contract that outlines all-expenses-paid trips program — spent three days in California, attending events, the athletic department’s $1,942,000 allowance. to games like these for her and her family. helping with a service project and talking with prospective stu- “For many people, their first interaction with the University “The numbers are difficult to compare,” Pintens said. “The dents about the University. Despite being part of the 56-person of Oregon is from hearing about our football team,” said ath- primary difference is student-athletes are two per room and staff official party, Eckstein said that he recognizes there is a problem letic department spokesperson Craig Pintens. ”It’s important we in some instances are one per room.” with how much is being spent in certain areas. continually perform at our highest level, which culminated this Despite the bunking situation, there are still great “The NCAA cartel and a variety of other factors lead to an year in a victory at the Rose Bowl.” disparities in the costs between the groups. Economics professor environment where students are consistently exploited,” Eck- This nearly $1.6 million is seen as about average for a large Bill Harbaugh said that expenses like these may be a reason that stein said. “The difference in cost suggests that we do not priori- football program to spend on a bowl appearance. For example, a the athletic department will not commit to an annual financial tize the student-athletes and participants who are the core of our year ago Iowa State spent $1,286,477 on its 27-13 loss to Rutgers contribution to the academic side, a deal agreed upon years ago athletic and academic success.” in the Pinstripe Bowl. Spending millions on a simple trip to play between former athletic director Bill Moos and former University [email protected]

o n l i n e e x c l u s i v e s — g o t o dailyemerald . c o m forecast

visit us online B AseBAll: CIVIL WAR PREVIEW MOVIE Review: THE AVENGERS TODAY dailyemerald.com On the heels of a series victory over the Pac-12 Humor, action and character clashes combine well High: 70 @dailyemerald Low: 41 second-place Wildcats, the Ducks return for a in Joss Whedon’s take on Marvel’s supergroup facebook.com/dailyemerald Partly cloudy matchup with the Beavers tonight — PAGE 5 scene | page 3 TALK TO US OPINION Limit submissions to 800 words. Submissions should include name, Editor Franklin Bains phone number and address. The Emerald reserves the right to [email protected] edit all submissions. One submission per person per calendar month. 541-346-5511 x321

stirring up debate and stimulating discussion on campus tuesday, may 8, 2012 THE HORNETS’ NEST | ANDREW SALDANA What are Fight Club requires scrutiny by higher-ups you saying

Before we delve into this week’s Oregon Student In reality, they’ve allegedly circumvented what is on the web? Association mishap (considering that it appears to now be a supposed to be a democratic system. And for what? weekly occurrence) I want to give a shout-out to some other Is it because they want more funding? Continued events I feel are worth spending some time on. funding? Or does it just boil down to wanting people who are On “Auction of authentic First, Cinco de Mayo happened this past Saturday and for sympathetic to your cause to be in power? athletic gear draws former the most part it was just another Saturday night in Eugene It doesn’t really matter what the justification is because (granted, the closest I came to the campus bar scene was nothing can justify this behavior. players’ ire” ANDREW Oak Street). Now, some apologists I’m sure at this point are SALDANA Thankfully, I didn’t encounter much cultural insensitivity, going to point out that it may not have been the OSA as a “Whoa whoa whoa! If players like Pryer A senior but if you saw me and began to apologize for wearing a “silly whole that was complicit with this scheme but rather from Ohio State get in trouble for selling double major big hat” and “pancho” then you probably made a poor choice “rogue” employees. their own objects then why should a Univer- in political dressing up. This is entirely true. But it doesn’t absolve them of sity make money off it? Basically selling a science and I enjoy drinking and having fun as much as the next condemnation, nor should it. football helmet because James or Thomas psychology, and lifetime Oregon person, but that doesn’t mean I lose the ability to discern that Even if higher-ups were unaware what was going on, it wore it…c’mon UO. It sounds alright but if resident, my behavior is likely to offend. doesn’t excuse them and in some ways it is worse. players didn’t get busted at other schools Andrew enjoys On a lighter note and in the spirit of drinking and having Where is the oversight? How could this take place for so doing then the Athletic Departments hiking, shooting, fun — Sasquatch Brew Fest is this Saturday, May 12. If you long without anybody picking up on it? We aren’t talking shouldn’t be able to do it.” video games enjoy local brews, good music and delicious food then there about some clandestine organization here. Gu est, may 7 and movies. is no better place than the Hilton this Saturday. Did I mention Furthermore, there needs to be some acknowledgement that it’s also for a good cause? What more could you ask for? of these allegations from the OSA. And more precisely, an On “Editorial: Fighting ‘Fight Back to your regularly scheduled programming. investigation into these claims. Fight Club’s well-known first rule is simple: Do not talk If this occurred in any other organization you would find Club’ by making the process about Fight Club. It seems that for nearly a decade those many a PR person trying desperately to get ahead of this story more transparent” involved followed this rule extremely well. and reassure the public that it was getting investigated. There are many facets to this story — all of them There has been no such report here. “OSA is not worth the $100,000 plus disgusting — but some more than others. Going forward, it will be interesting to see how far this students pay now. That cost is simply to be It is difficult to even determine where to begin. rabbit hole goes. As it will also be interesting to see what — if a member school and have an on campus As one commenter on the original story pointed out, the any — action OSA takes to remedy the situation. staff person. It doesn’t include board meet- only way this could have been worse (or better, depending Considering they now employ two former ings or conferences. Which, by the way are on your view) would be if the potential candidates actually beneficiaries of their alleged impropriety, I won’t hold my the same group of students going every got in the ring to duke it out until only one was left standing. breath for the latter. time. We can pretend fight club is the fault It should come as no surprise that lobbying and money Fortunately, now that this story is out there, there is a of individuals but the fact is every current are involved in politics at every level. Recently, this notion of possibility for real change in campus politics. The community OSA staff member from UO was directly money in politics has been strengthened and reinforced by is now privy to these under-handed practices and now that involved in ASUO elections if not a member the Citizens United Supreme Court ruling. this behavior has been exposed it will make it more difficult But for such blatant political favoring from an for those who wish to continue with said practices. of exec, if that connection doesn’t bother organization, which is a nonprofit and whose goal is to give Ironically, this might be OSA’s greatest accomplishment; I you it should. The “student run” organiza- students a lobbying voice in Salem and D.C., is contrary to eagerly await their newsletter praising their efforts. tion really only gets input from a handful of everything they claim to stand for. [email protected] political hopefuls and the group of students who go to conferences and help with on campus campaigns is not diverse at all. the opinion desk gives thumbs Maybe ethnically but only to appear pro- up — and thumbs down — to gressive while secretly choosing and devel- THE GOOD & THE BAD big issues this week oping students of color to tokenize. I agree student lobby organizations are extremely important but OSA is not the answer. I have faith UO students are capable of doing this Willamette Valley music g oing once, going twice, sold! work and organizing with other schools in festival rocks on As of this writing, former Oregon running Oregon for a lot less than we pay now. I By all accounts, students just watched back (and, lest we forget, erstwhile boxer) think a student group could be accessible in a spectacular set of concerts take place all LeGarrette Blount’s locker panel is bidding at a way it will never be under ASUO EXEC. It over campus last weekend. Even the Student $158 and has six days left. (His locker panel!) would also be easier to hold the group ac- Stage, which saw a group of performers’ And though Blount is now a two-year player countable during budget season. Let’s face equipment literally erupt in flames, was in the NFL, he won’t see a cent of what will it OSA is a campaign running organization unencumbered by the anything-but-certain become a several-hundred-dollar transaction. whether its get out the vote, dream act, Eugene weather. Beyond being able to take in Same for LaMichael James, a second-round student government, or a counter attack awesome music, students got to experience NFL draftee, who will watch his old jersey sell campaign. All students, not just ASUO affili- all the local talent that Eugene has to offer. for nearly $2,800 that he won’t touch. ates need to take a close look at OSA and decide if there’s a better, cheaper, more apologies to mexico for all the oregon baseball, once again honest way to represent students in Salem sombreros because there is.” We know, it’s gotten a bit redundant to As many have said, Cinco de Mayo is both keep endorsing the Ducks baseball team, but a popular drinking holiday in the U.S. and a solution, may 7 over the weekend they reasserted their domi- commemoration of the Battle of Puebla which O n Twitter nance in the Pac-12’s pecking order with two ended in a victory for the Mexicans over the solid wins against the next-closest team, the French. So, hundreds of gigantic sombreros, “I love how the @DailyEmerald lists Wildcats of Arizona. With several key players false mustaches and margaritas later, we De’Anthony tweeting “HAPPY CINCO DE returning from injury, the team is a couple know there have been far too many cases of MAYO” as the top tweet of the week.... of series away from being able to look at the cultural misappropriation throughout Eugene. really? #smh” larger NCAA picture. Sorry for all of that. S teven kirby (@stevenkirby7), May 7

NEWSROOM Special sections editor Opinion editor x321 Scene editor x321 Photo editors x327 Design editor x326 BUSINESS Delivery ADVERTISING Editors-in-chief x325 Rebecca Sedlak Franklin Bains Kelly Ardis Michael Ciaglo Griffin Fun Publisher x317 Dominic Allen Director x303 Tyree Harris, 2011-12 Sports editor x322 Columnists Scene reporters Alex McDougall Designers Ryan M. Frank Nicholas Baker Brittney Reynolds Patrick Malee Suzy Doss Andy Rossback, 2012-13 Sam Bouchat Amanda Barker Photographers Erin Garza Marketing Marcus Hidalgo Representatives Oregon Daily Emerald Managing editor x324 Sports reporters Kenny Ocker Ben Kendall Nate Barrett Nate Makuch coordinator Jackson Jorman-Miller Alyssa Adkisson 1222 E 13th Ave., #300, McKenna Brown Lucas Clark Jacob O’Gara Kevin Piaskowski Tess Freeman Jacob West Ian McKivor Jamie Barclift Eugene, OR 97403 David Lieberman Andrew Saldana Mitch Small Jenny Kao News editors x320 Jeff Matarrese Multimedia editor x326 Kawika Bernal Isaac Rosenthal Digital Media Jeff Kresse 541.346.5511 Becky Metrick Copy chiefs x323 Dan Freimark Developer Jeff Leanse Daniel Bonner Josephine Woolington Ponta Abadi Multimedia producers Ivar Vong Emily Letcher Mary Duke The Oregon Daily Emerald is Tim Hays News reporters Jonathan Bowers Tyler Carrington Manager x302 Zach Kezer Kat Koury published by the Oregon Daily Branden Andersen Matt Walks Eliza Collins Kathy Carbone Zach Kirihara Emerald Publishing Co., Inc. Kirsten Ohlendorf Sydney Madge Ryan Dutch Copy editors Administrative Riley Shanahan at the University of Oregon, Tommy Pittenger Conor Stott John Goodwin Lindsey Tucker assistants Thomas Weaver Eugene, Ore. The Emerald Mia Schauffler Sam Uyeki Eddie Paskal Chelsea Wicks Ritchie Benevedes Madyson Zetterberg Amber Wilmarth operates independently of Will Rubin Jason Lohman Creative the University with offices in Emily Schiola services Suite 300 of the Erb Memorial Sam Stites Michele Ross Union. The Emerald is private Betsy Swanback Tara Sloan property. © 2012 Editor Kelly Ardis SCENE

arts, culture and entertainment from a student perspective tuesday, may 8, 2012

MOVIE REVIEW s ‘Avengers’: More than just another superhero movie Director, writer Joss Whedon’s screenplay spans from the expected action scenes to the heroes’ character flaws

rebecca sedlak supernatural aspects. special sections editor “How you mix the two of those works very well in the comic books,” “Iron Man” director and “The Avengers” pro- “The Avengers” is a mega movie. ducer Jon Favreau said in 2009, “but it’s going to take a lot of It shattered the opening-weekend record, pulling in $207.4 thoughtfulness to make that all work and not blow the reality that million (and beat previous record-holder “Harry Potter and we’ve created.” the Deathly Hallows: Part 2,” which had set the bar with But in the end the combo worked. $169.2 million). Whedon’s script captured the clash and moments of understanding between the larger-than-life characters. The super- The film has also been in the planning books since 2005, when heroes have previously been in their own isolated worlds, and Marvel Studios decided to ride the comics and superhero movie putting them all in one room doesn’t automatically mean they’ll craze to the limit — release separate main character films and be friends. Egos clash, and they point out each other’s weak- then create a whopping cross-over flick. First came “Iron Man” nesses. In Captain America’s eyes early in the movie, Stark is just and “The Incredible Hulk” in 2008, “Iron Man 2” in 2010, and a “big man in a suit of armor” — lose that and he’s powerless. “Thor” and “Captain America: The First Avenger” last summer. To which Stark replies, “You’re a laboratory experiment, Rogers. (Plus more are in the works.) Everything special about you came out of a bottle.” Ouch. If you saw any of these Marvel Cinematic Universe films and But there are good moments between the characters, too. Stark stuck around after the credits, you might have caught Samuel and Banner connect in the lab. Both are crazy-smart scientists L. Jackson’s cameos and heard him mention “the Avengers (which Stark’s rambling dialogue and playboy attitude can some- initiative” — that would be this movie. times make you forget), and both feel the terrible privilege that Directed and written by Joss Whedon, creator of “Buffy the comes with their superhuman powers. Ruffalo, the third actor to Vampire Slayer,” “The Avengers” is all about bringing a group play The Hulk in less than a decade, makes a good addition to of superheroes together to save the world. Namely Tony Stark’s the cast (replacing Edward Norton after negotiations with Marvel Iron Man (Robert Downey, Jr.), Bruce Banner’s The Hulk (Mark fell through). Ruffalo), Captain America aka Steve Rogers (Chris Evans), and And even though these guys have tense arguments, battle Loki Thor (Chris Hemsworth), a Norse god from Asgard. and fight off an alien invasion, there are also tons of light mo- The movie opens with Loki, a delusional would-be tyrant and ments sprinkled around. The humor is packed with a lot of one- Thor’s adoptive brother, successfully stealing an object called a liners and brief moments of comedy, and it doesn’t feel forced or Tesseract from the U.S. government. The Tesseract is a powerful fabricated. We all know Tony Stark’s brand of charming douche- cube of energy from Asgard that has the ability to open portals be- baggery, which is one of the reasons the two Iron Man movies tween galaxies (which is convenient for Loki, since he’s planning were so successful, so humor isn’t new in the way Marvel has an alien invasion). S.H.I.E.L.D., a secret military law-enforcement handled its superhero movies in the past. The film’s midnight agency led by its eye-patch-wearing chief Nick Fury (Jackson), is premiere had the entire audience bursting out laughing at the jokes. pretty pissed that Loki stole it. “As of right now, we’re at war!” The combination of the heroes might seem odd to some. The The bottom line: You don’t have to see all the other movies Fury announces, to which an agent responds, “What do we do?” Avengers are not a family like the Fantastic Four, and they’re not a before this one, though it would help. While there are most likely Cue “The Avengers” title appearing on screen. group of outlaw mutants like the X-Men. back stories and details that were over my head, the stellar script and acting made “The Avengers” an enjoyable movie event. Fury and Russian double agent Natasha Romanoff (Scarlett The Avengers are a government-sponsored mishmash of Johansson) gather the different superheroes together. And strong, individual characters with their own origins. Iron Grade: A- they’ve got to figure out how to work together to stop Loki. Man, for instance, is a tech-based hero, while Thor has [email protected]

Study in PORTLAND

take cRedit classes and woRkshops • Art and Digital Arts • Arts and Administration • Architecture • Product Design • Creative Technology and Fabrication

We welcome newly admitted and continuing UO students as well as community members and professionals, UO tour today! alumni, and university students from around the world. lease for From weekend workshops to full eight-week summer session classes, check out the UO School of Architecture 2012 and Allied Arts summer program located at the White Stag Block in historic Old Town-Chinatown. SUMMER in the City2012

RegistRation begins May 7, 2012, for current UO students on DuckWeb. May 11, 2012, for non-UO students, contact UO Academic Extension to register: 800-824-2714 or e-mail [email protected].

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University of Oregon in Portland School of Architecture and Allied Arts 70 NW Couch Street Portland OR 97209-4038 503-412-3718 [email protected] livearenadistrict.com 888.450.9281 31209 4 Oregon Daily Emerald Tuesday, May 8, 2012 SCENE For a full list of today’s events go to TODAY dailyemerald.com/section/scene/ WHAT’S GOING ON?

Academics/ Arts/ Culture Sesame Street Live Involvement Curren$y Where: Matthew ‘The Ecology of Where: WOW Hall Knight Arena Indoor Environ- When: 9 p.m. When: 7 p.m. ments’ by Jessica Cost: $14 — $60 Green Cost: $20 Where: 182 Lillis Sour Beer Funk Fest When: 7 p.m. Poetry in Song Where: Bier Stein Cost: Free Where: Beall Concert Hall When: 11 a.m. — When: 7 — 9 p.m. 11 p.m., today and tomorrow Cost: Free Cost: Free Siri Vik Where Or When The Life & Lyrics Jack of Lorenz Hart DeJohnette Fri, May 18 Chick Corea Sun, May 20 Stanley Clarke Wed, May 9 7 p/9:15 p Mike & Nancy Oft Rose

The Shedd Institute 05.09 Jack DeJohnette 70th, Carrie w/ Corea & Clarke 05.10 & 13 The Emerald City Jazz Kings Rodriguez On The Road w/ Jimmy van Heusen Sat, March 12 05.12 Carrie Rodriguez 05.18 & 20 Siri Vik: Where Or When, The Life & Lyrics of Lorenz Hart Tickets/more info: 541-434-7000 or theshedd.org 868 High Street (E Broadway & High), Eugene College students 10% discount most shows.

DUCKS AFTER DARK DOUBLE FEATURE ME AND YOU AND EVERYONE WE KNOW A lonely shoe salesman and an eccentric performance artist struggle to connect in this unique take on contemporary life.

LIFE IN A DAY A documentary shot by filmmakers all over the world that serves as a time capsule to show future generations what it was like to be alive on the 24th of July, 2010.

FREE COLUMBIA 150 MAY 10th – 9pm + 11pm FREE PIZZA, DRINKS, AND GIVEAWAYS facebook.com/DucksAfterDark ‘WE TALKIN’ BOUT PRACTICE’ SPORTS On the tenth anniversary of the infamous Allen Iverson Editor ‘practice?’ video, have we taken sports references too far? Patrick Malee sports | page 6 [email protected] 541-346-5511 x322 your home for oregon sports news tuesday, may 8, 2012 BASEBALL s rivalry round two Oregon will take on Oregon State in their second of five Civil War games this season, and the last at PK Park

michael ciaglo photo editor Oregon’s Thomas Walker slides to tap the base before Oregon State’s Ryan Barnes can tag him out. The Beavers lead this year’s Civil War series 1-0 over the Ducks despite Oregon’s eight hits, three walks and an Oregon State error in the April 24 Oregon loss.

Isaac Rosenthal against Stanford. Jones hit .250 for the sports reporter Ducks last weekend with hits in all three games against Arizona. Oregon enters the game as the winner of seven After a key series win against The Beavers are ranked sixth in a deep of its last eight games, a decidedly different then-No. 11 Arizona last weekend, the Pac-12, but their offense is among the No. 9 Ducks return to action Tuesday conference’s best. The Beavers trail only situation than the two-game losing streak night against No. 23 Oregon State in the Arizona and Stanford in runs scored, and the Ducks rode into their April 24 matchup. second Civil War matchup of the season. no Pac-12 team has drawn more than the Oregon State won the first game between Beavers’ 197 walks on the season. the two foes by a 7-1 score. It will be the 17th game of the year The nonconference game is the against a ranked opponent for the head coach George Horton and his San Clemente, Calif., native hit .353 second of five matchups between the ri- Ducks, who are 12-4 against the top 25. Oregon State counterpart Pat Casey (6-17) last week and added six RBI vals this season and the last at PK Park. Oregon State is 7-7 against ranked teams pits two coaches who focus on the little in the critical series. For his efforts, The Ducks (34-14, 16-8 Pac-12) will this year, including two wins against things, and not surprisingly the Ducks Payne was awarded the Pac-12 offen- close the season with three Pac-12 games then-No. 12 Stanford last weekend. and Beavers lead the Pac-12 in sacrifice sive player of the week award for the in Corvallis May 25-27. It’s yet another test for a strong bunts with 63 and 62 respectively. second-straight week. Oregon enters the game as the winner Oregon pitching staff that leads the Pac- Oregon State’s bats are led by the The Ducks will look to avoid the of seven of its last eight games, a decid- 12 in ERA, and the Beavers’ plate disci- tandem of Tyler Smith and Michael Con- missed opportunities that haunted them edly different situation than the two- pline is a particularly tough task for a forto, who are each batting above .340 in their April loss to Oregon State. The game losing streak the Ducks rode into Ducks team that has been vulnerable to for the Beavers. In addition to his .346 Ducks lost that game 7-1 despite the their April 24 matchup. Oregon State giving up walks this season. batting average, Conforto has a confer- benefit of eight hits, three walks and (30-15, 11-10 Pac-12) enters on a two- That plate discipline has helped the ence best 55 RBI and a slugging per- a Beaver error. Horton said after that game win streak after taking two out of Beavers to a .380 team on-base percent- centage of .566 to go along with a team game he felt his team played with an three games from Stanford last weekend. age, more than 100 points better than leading eight home runs. uncharacteristic lack of enthusiasm. The Ducks also have the services Oregon State’s team batting average Second baseman Aaron Payne will Neither team has named a starting of Aaron Jones, who missed the last of .276. look to stay hot for the Ducks after pitcher for the game. Civil War with an ankle injury suffered The coaching matchup of Oregon another big weekend in Tucson. The [email protected]

follow us on twitter @odesports like us on facebook.com/dailyemerald 6 Oregon Daily Emerald Tuesday, May 8, 2012 Supported by Knights of Columbus #1430 SPORTS

THE RED ZONE | PATRICK MALEE

29006 Cut the cliches; you’re not being clever

I was scrolling mindlessly of white pigment — recite the through ESPN.com the other day Iverson diatribe verbatim, apply- when I saw, in the “Have You ing it to some situation in their ... We’ve managed Seen?” box at the center of the own life (yes, I’m one of those peo- page, the infamous Allen Iver- ple). They muster their best (read: to ‘meme’ Allen son “practice?” video was be- horrible) impression of Iverson’s Iverson into oblivion. Summer Term at the ing celebrated for its momentous Hampton, Va., twang and scream, Congratulations, tenth anniversary. “PRACTICE? WE TALKIN’ ABOUT Patrick University of Oregon A year ago, I probably would have … PRACTICE??” everyone. Malee is a senior clicked on it, just for old time’s sake. And then, on cue, everyone journalism REL 303: Japanese Religions: Zen It remains, to this day, one of the erupts in laughter like it’s the most bury my head in my hands. student from best press conferences of all time. original sketch since Saturday & Pure Land Buddhism Among the other great things Chicago. And yet for all its brilliance, I also Night Live’s glory days. Entering his MTWR 10:00-12:20 June 25th - July 22nd we’ve managed to ruin: 4 credits felt strangely repulsed by the video Enough. I can’t take it anymore, third year at the ADVERTISER AD NUMBER SALES REP Emerald, he will Fulfills Social Science and International Cultures — somehow, in this moment, it took and that’s why I didn’t click on that LeBron James serve as editor General Ed requirements -don the form of the last slice of pizza ESPN link. In what has to be the An obvious pick, but seriously, of the sports that looks positively repulsive an first of many side effects of this In- it feels like people talk about ev- desk this year. REL 102: hour after you’ve stuffed yourself. I formation Era, we’ve managed to World Religions: Near erything but LeBron’s actual game An avid Chicago felt physically repelled from clicking “meme” Allen Iverson into oblivion. Eastern Traditions anymore. His crunch time prow- sports fan, he the link. Congratulations, everyone. hopes to one MTWR 10:00-12:20 July 23rd - August 15th original size/color: ess, his personal life, how he trav- PRINT DIGITAL AD COLUMNS ______X ______IN. The funny thing is, none of this And to be clear, Iverson is far day work as a 4 credits els to games, his hairline — it all has anything--” to x do --”with the video from alone. It’s so easy these days feature writer RUN DATE Fulfills Arts & Letters, and Identity, Pluralism & Tolerance If this isn’t the size ordered, you must contact amounts to an endless stream of for a national COLOR ______itself. Allen Iverson is still hilari- to overuse popular references that MON TUE WED THURSGeneral FRI Ed requirements your client to get correct size. OR turn in this nothingness, dissecting things that magazine. ous, and formhis withrelative a work disappear order have- ad withinremade evenat a week, a brilliant mo- never needed to be picked apart in SPECIAL SECTION ______ance fromcorrect the public size. eye remains ment can be sanded into sawdust. REL 304: Religions of India the first place. Maybe we should saddening to most basketball fans I used to love the HBO show “The MTWR 10:00-2:20 August 20th - Sept. 9th stop worrying about whether he’s (including myself). You see, what Wire,” for example, until people 4 credits the next Michael Jordan, or how actually kept me from watching began to reference it in connec- Fulfills Social Science and International Cultures spoiled he can be, and just enjoy General Ed requirements the “practice” rant one more time tion to everything from basketball

32093 watching him play basketball. was everything but the content games to political power struggles. Not everything he does has some of the video itself. That is to say, Look at anything Fox Sports’ Ja- profound meaning; in fact, almost it’s become such a staple of sports son Whitlock writes (on second none of it does. At times it feels popular culture that, like bacon thought, don’t), and I guarantee like people want to project every- (yeah, I said it) or the song “Hey you’ll find a Wire reference some- thing about life on LeBron James Ya,” we’ve managed to ruin it by where in the column. The show PIZZA & A PINT — injustice, personal failure, sheer overuse. still has a special place in my greed, receding hairlines — rather I can’t tell you how many heart, but now any time someone than just sitting back and watching ALL TUESDAY times I’ve heard people — mostly brings it up, my first reaction is to him gallop across the open court for a dunk. Because really, that’s NIGHT! all he’s doing. Everything else is conjecture. $ .95 Jose Canseco’s Twitter Become Actually, this isn’t a “great” 9 thing at all, and if the constant an egg retweeting of Canseco’s account Every Tuesday night is Pizza and a Pint Night! donor. has ruined anything, it’s my gener- From 5 PM to close for only $9.95 you can get al sanity. First of all, if I wanted to any 10” regular size pizza with your choice of Earn see his inane splatters of thought, any Steelhead micro-brew or our famous I’d follow him myself. Mainly, draft rootbeer. $4,000! though, it seems a bit seedy to cel- ebrate the ignorance of a man who • MAGHERITA PIZZA • HAWAIIAN is pretty clearly suffering psycho- • GREEK • BARBECUED CHICKEN logical turmoil. Plus, even if it was • FOUR CHEESE • BREWHAUS SPECIAL funny once upon a time, the joke gets pretty old. • PEPPERONI • CALZONE Holograms This is a new one, but lately everyone’s been wondering how the Help Yourself bY Tupac hologram technology could be used in other realms of entertain- ment, and … wait, what’s that? I Helping otHers wrote about that two weeks ago? I’ll go back to my corner now. [email protected] 199 E. 5th. Ave. • Eugene The Help infertile women make their Restaurant: 686-2739 Fertility dreams come true. Since 1978, Keg Hotline: 341-1330 Center The Fertility Center of Oregon has www.steelheadbrewery.com helped many women achieve pregnancy. Procedures are done in our pleasant Eugene clinic over a period of just six weeks. If you are a healthy woman, age What’s trending on campus? 21–31, and are interested, please visit Campus of www.FertilityCenterofOregon.com or Find out. OregOn call 541-683-1559. summER JOBs @dailyemerald ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ 2x5p_1 Interviewing May 9th & 16th 10-2 pm Ducks Bistro Meeting Room For more information call Quantum Recruiters (541) 683-1757 32061

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uosummer.uoregon.edu facebook.com/uosummer That’s my editor! MARY SHARON MOORE | Editor, Writer, UO alumna 541-346-3475 The New York Times Syndication Sales Corporation ESL specialty | Student620 rate Eighth | Avenue, 30+ Newyears York, experience N.Y. 10018 EO/AA/ADA institution committed to cultural diversity. © 2012 University of Oregon DES 189p For Information Call: 1-800-972-3550 [email protected] Release Tuesday, | 541.687.2046 May 08, 2012

Edited by Will Shortz No. 0403 Across 34 Eater of lean, in 56 ’60s teach-in 123 45678 910111213 1 Morning times, rhyme grp. for short 36 Like the 57 Missouri river to 14 15 16 4 Come to pass bathroom after a the Missouri 9 Chose, with “for” hot shower River 17 18 19 14 Vital fluid 39 Restaurant chain 58 Spirit of a culture 20 21 22 15 Hangman’s with syrup 59 French pronoun halter dispensers on 60 Gives a darn? every table 23 24 25 26 16 Bones below the 61 “Likely ___!” 40 Gymgoer’s pride tibia 62 Six-foot runner? 27 28 29 30 17 Top prize in the 43 Tough guys Juegos 44 Narrow cut Down 31 32 33 Olímpicos 45 One of several 1 At present 34 35 18 Mosquito on a French 2 Words from an Magnets and door aspiring fiancé 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 flypaper 46 Always, in 3 Bratty, say 20 Snack chips sonnets 4 Source of the 43 44 45 made from corn 47 Feature of a headline “World 22 Loving to bits gladiator sandal Death Rate 46 47 48 23 Campers’ 49 How some Holding Steady lightweight professional at 100 Percent,” 49 50 51 52 cover-ups services are with “The” 26 Opposite of old, offered 5 Faithfulness 53 54 55 56 in Germany 52 Modern sight on 6 S.&P. 500 27 Gathering many an Indian listings: Abbr. 57 58 59 clouds, e.g. reservation 7 Put into service 60 61 62 28 Amo, ___, amat 53 Working 8 Quick 29 Whistles of relief components of summaries an engine … or Puzzle by Paula Gamache 31 Hump day: Abbr. what the ends of 9 ___ von 32 Winter forecast 18-, 23-, 34- and Bismarck 32 ___ Club 37 Bette Midler film 45 Components of 33 Sermon server 47-Across are? 10 Catherine who (Costco loosely based on scores: Abbr. was the last wife competitor) Janis Joplin’s life 47 Film director Lee of Henry VIII 33 Knight, to a 38 Old Volkswagen ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE 11 Instructor’s 48 Fresh, in an damsel seven-seater impolite way APART DEBS S I S charge 40 Coffeehouse PRI ES ALAI L IMP 12 Disney-owned 34 Binge server 50 Home of the cable Cowboys, PORCHSWI NG EXPO 35 Punxsutawney 41 Endlessly informally SPYR ING MATTER broadcaster of ___ (Groundhog 42 Withdrawal’s game highlights Day celeb) 51 Individuals UR L SMASHH I T opposite 13 Gross out 54 Lawyer: Abbr. PLAI T DUO PEG 36 Second wife, to 44 ___.com (urban 19 Causes of end the hubby’s kids myth debunker) 55 Fraternity “P” L I NT TUBULE ROB zone AMY BULLRUN ABA celebrations, for For answers, call 1-900-285-5656, $1.49 a minute; or, with a credit YAO OGL I NG I DOL short card, 1-800-814-5554. LAY EMS KNEEL 21 Big weight Annual subscriptions are available for the best of Sunday 24 Wildly crosswords from the last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. MUDSLIDE MID AT&T users: Text NYTX to 386 to download puzzles, or visit ANT HEM E A S YW I N 25 Nubby fabric nytimes.com/mobilexword for more information. ILIE PIANOSCORE derived from a Online subscriptions: Today’s puzzle and more than 2,000 past cocoon D I MS LORD MARKS puzzles, nytimes.com/crosswords ($39.95 a year). 29 Shawl or stole Share tips: nytimes.com/wordplay. STE YUKS ERNST 30 Batter’s datum Crosswords for young solvers: nytimes.com/learning/xwords. health & wellness tuesday may 8, 2012 keeping you fit and fresh for your college lifestyle ,

GUEST COMMENTARY | Ben kendall Health center offers much more than a typical clinic

BEN I was walking down the KENDALL sidewalk one late winter Eugene has been day in the drizzling frigid rain captured by when I spied a puddle in front hill people of me next to the curb. For some and writes his stories odd reason, I imagined myself using only as a sort of chubby gazelle, and his tongue I leapt off the curb as though while bound launching myself from one river- hand to foot in bank to the other somewhere in a moonshine the Serengeti Plain. My left foot shack. hit the pavement outside edge He is also a junior at the first, with all of my weight on University’s top of it. I heard several cracks School of and pops. Journalism. At the time it seemed funny to me, despite the dull pain that began to rise up my leg. I began to laugh. Knowing I had to get out of the road (as I was now in the middle of it) I hazarded a step. Immediately that dull pain became a crashing sen- sation and between cackles, I gagged. “OK, I’m really hurt,” I said. That made it even funnier. Maybe it was a stress response to the horrible pain I was feel- ing, but at the time I couldn’t stop laughing, and I was barely holding down the vomit as I nate barrett photographer dragged myself off the road. The Students enter the University Health Center through an entrance along Agate Street across from Hamilton complex. Any student can obtain physical therapy or other forms of medicine for as low as $15 per visit. curb was only a foot high. It was remarkably embarrassing. It was only after two weeks The not-so-cool thing was that way for students to relieve a little of trying to be macho and walk I found out too late that there are bit of stress incurred during the it off that I went to the Physical shuttle rides for students who term. You may have to get your The University Health Center is Therapy and Sports Medicine lab can’t walk around campus easily. appointment early as they fill up at the University Health Center. I It’s a great service, but now that I quickly, especially near the end of well-rounded for a small student was seen by a wonderful woman could walk around well enough I the term. service clinic on campus. If you’ve got a named Clodagh Thompson. A didn’t need it. Weeks of hobbling If you’re traveling out of the medical problem that doesn’t involve physical therapist originally from to classes all over campus had country over the summer, the Cork, Ireland, she told me that been in vain. Health Center’s Travel Clinic an emergency situation, the Health I had a stage-two (out of three What else does the Health may be the place for your vacci- Center can probably help you out. stages) tear in the connective tis- Center do that we might not know nations. When they review your sue in my ankle. I’d have to use about? Well, how about equally travel itinerary the clinic suggests thread with all University Health Center is well-rounded for a a brace for a few weeks and do affordable massages? They cost the particular vaccine cocktail Center services, the prices will be small student service clinic on some rehab exercises. a dollar a minute and you can you may need. Afterwards, they quite reasonable. campus. If you’ve got a medi- The cool thing was the cost schedule appointments for 30, provide you with an interna- The Health Center also cal problem that doesn’t involve was remarkably low for my visit 45 or 60 minutes. This is pretty tionally recognized certificate offers dental services, mental an emergency situation, the — about $30 altogether. It was far below the average going rate of vaccination to take with you. health services and even healing Health Center can probably help around $15 for the visit and $15 for massages, which could be It isn’t free of course, but keep- touch (Reiki) services. Strangely you out. for the brace. around double that. This is a great ing in line with the common enough, the University Health [email protected]

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Round out your schedule with an upper division credit.

Spring Weekend Workshops

Substance Abuse Prevention Program SAPP workshops are an excellent sapp.uoregon.edu opportunity for students to explore 541-346-4135 [email protected] a variety of interesting topics and career options. Workshops are EO/AA/ADA institution committed open to all students. to cultural diversity.