Includes 1985 Index February 15, 1986 Quaker Thought FRIENDS and Life OURNAL Today FRIENDS JOURNAL (ISSN 0016-1322) was escablished in 19SS as che successor to The Friend Whose Death Is It, Anyway? (1827- 19SS) and Friends /ntelligen~r (1844-19SS). II is Emily T . Wilson ...... 18 associated with the Religious FRIENDS Society or Friends, and is a The Elastic Thread Rose Ketterer ...... 19 member of Associaced Church Press. A Meditation on the Tapestry of Life STAFF JOURNAL Grace Yaukey ...... 20 Vinton Deming, Editor-Manager Eve Homan, Assodatt Editor The Four Doors Bliss Forbush ...... 21 Barbara Benton and February 15, 1986 Vol.32, No.3 John Davis Gummere, Design A Remembrance-Esko Saari Carolyn Terrell, Advertising/ Cir~u/ation/Promotion Mary B. Howarth ...... 22 Joyce Marie Martin, Gene Contents Miyakawa, and Ruch Laughlin FRIENDS JouRNAL 1985 Index ...... 34 Typography Among Friends: Worth the Trip Jeanne G. Beisel, Secretarial Services Eve Homan ...... 2 Reports ...... 23 Resources ...... 28 James Neveil, Bookkeeper Renee C. Crauder, Editorial Moses Bailey's Lifetime Wellness Plan WorldofFriends .24 Milestones ...... 29 Assistant Larry Cargill ...... 3 VOLUNTEERS Forum ...... 26 Classified ...... 30 Jane Burgess (Index); Older Friends Respond ...... 4 Emily Conlon and Alia: Loxley Cover photograph by Terry Foss of Rachel (Editorial Assistan~); On Being 90 Floyd Schmoe ...... 6 Mary Erkes (Office Azistance) Except for Mirrors and Memories: Davis DuBois, 94-year-old member of Phila­ BOARD OF MANAGERS 1983-1986: A Conversation With Phyllis Sanders delphia Yearly Meeting's Committee on Aging. Kirk L. Bjomsgaard Dean Bratis Vinton J. Deming ...... 8 Helen Morgan Brooks Sol A. Jaeobson Have Minute, Will Travel Norma Jacob 11 Leonard Kenworthy Rowland K. Leonard Friends House: Living in the Present Mary Mangelsdorf Linell McCurry (Clerk) Elizabeth Folger Boardman ...... 12 1984-1987: Frank Bjornsgaard Preparing for the Later Years Judich Brown Emily Conlon (Azistant Clerk) Irven Roberts ...... 14 Peter Finaescen Mary Howarth A House of One's Own Phyllis F. Agard .. 15 Marcia Paullin William D. Scrong (Treasurer) Things That Matter, and Bulldozers Thomas Swain Allen Terrell Cheri Junk ...... 17 Mary Wood 1985- 1988: John Breasced Carol H. Brown (Secretary) Teresa J. Engeman Norma P. Jacob Herbert L. Nichols Elizabeth B. Wacson HONORARY MANAGERS Friends: Worth the Eleanor Scabler Clarke Mildred Binns Young ne man recently lamented that so much to have a special meaning. As we were FORMER EDITORS Oleucc Sanders written about aging just doesn't ring them for publication, I was also visiting my Susan Corson~finnen y true-like a travelogue written by some­ cally ill grandmother. I wondered, as she Ruch Geibel Kilpack O James D. Lenhart one who never made the trip. In this special issue dered, why she kept on living when she Alfred Scefferud Franca Williams Browin on aging, the articles are written by people who to die. As this issue went to press, she did. William Hubben are making this trip-or are helping others make Vinton Deming was also moved by the •fRIENDS JOURNAL is published che firsc and fifeeench of each month it-with grace, style, and humor. ing that this special issue came to have for him (exa:pc January June, July, Augusc, and Sepeembet, when ic is published Aging is a trip that I, who recently struggled Vint spent the week with his parents in Chicago monchly) by Friends Publishing Corporacion, I SOl Cherry Sc., past my 30th birthday, am just learning about. His father died in a nursing home during Philadelphia, PA 19102. Telephone (21S) 2A I·7277. Second-class poscage Mary Hoxie Jones's reflections on the things that time, while Vint's mother was still paid ac Philadelphia, Pa. she yearned for at various stages of her life-only from hip surgery. • Subscriptions: one year SIS, two years $29, chree years $43. Add $6 to discover to her surprise that at age 81 those The positive, thoughtful articles on living per year for poscage oucside Uniced States and "possessions." Foreign once all-important desires don't mean much to death and dying helped me consider death as remiccances should be in U.S. dollars her now-have helped give me a new perspective part of life, for, as William Penn wrote, " or adjusted for currency differential. Single eopies: $1; samples sene on on decisions I'm facing at this stage of my life­ is no more than a Turning of us over from request. • Information on and assistance children? house? career? save the world? to Eternity." with advenising is available on requesc. Appearance of any Vinton Deming's conversation with Phyllis advertisemenc does noc imply Sanders helped underline the immediacy of endorsemenc by FRIENDS JOURNAL. Copyrighc © 1986 by Friends planning for a life many years in the future. Publishing Corporacion. Reprincs of articles available ac nominal c:ost. What kind of "old lady" do I want to be? What Permission should be reeeived before reprinting excerpcs longer than 200 can I do to ensure that I do not end up old, A note to subscribers: The trouble we've words. Available in micromm from University Microfilms International. alone, and dependent on an inadequate Social having with our computer software is Security check? our prompt response to your requests: Especially encouraging is the way that Norma of issues not received or received in ... u.., .., ...... Jacobs has emphasized the growing in growing changes of address, renewals, new su POIIIIIUitr: send oddnss cb- lo old. And the articles by Bliss Forbush and Emily FRIENDS JOURNAL, 1501 Cherry Sl., We regret any inconvenience that this is "''"u"'".!'l Phhd

2 Moses Bailey's Lifetime Wel1ness Plan

Read the Bible again and again. When someone learns that you are a by Larry Cargill Take what is helpful to you. Quaker and begins to lift you up on a pedestal, resist it. Friends don't belong Moses Bailey has taken me on many Choose lifework that you enjoy. on pedestals. In truth they are found philosophical travels, as we made our Figure it out and don't settle for less. moving forward, standing still, or sit­ weekly pilgrimage to Friends meeting Television can be helpful, but on a ting on their backsides. in my car. Based on those conversa­ daily basis its greatest utility is as a Learn French and German (with your tions-and with rampant rhetorical resting place for good books. English) to unlock key areas of knowl­ license-/ have written my interpreta­ edge and to communicate broadly. tion of what I call "The Good Friend Mentor continuously. Spread wellness Moses Bailey Lifetime Wei/ness Plan. , to all continents. Constantly look over your shoulder to Think future. What issues are coming avoid that dreaded Quaker nemesis, Keep the desire for knowledge burning 10 to I00 years from now? hypocrisy. strong. Appreciate what you know Pause before speaking-to ensure that and marvel at all that's left to learn. Read two new books a month for a lifetime. Build a tower of knowledge, mind and mouth are connected. Be a lifetime athlete. In early years book upon book. When you put together thots that you jog from village to village in Palestine. After 50, take long walks and do daily like, print them and send them to floor exercises. friends. Plant seeds of wellness philosophy far and wide. Avoid all advertising. It'll rile the In the Quaker faith, with its simplici­ blood. ty, harmony, equality, and communi­ Strive for integrity. Make it your daily ty, there is great power. Only living mantra. the faith releases that power. A steady correspondence with friends And like Moses' front door, keep the old and new provides stimulation and heart open to all. 0 satisfaction. When you marry and think reproduc­ tion, read about world population and repeat "two" over and over and over. . Eat vegetarian. A visit to a slaughter­ house will provide motivation. Eat only when hungry, and befriend yogurt. Laugh heartily when you won't hurt feelings. Store up those other laughs till you get home and then hold your A member of Hartford (Conn.) sides to keep them from splitting. Meeting and clerk of its Peace Have some of the best laughs on and Social Concerns Committee, Larry Cargill is also a member of yourself. the American Friends Service Committee's New England Peace Nurture family. The fruits of your Committee. Moses Bailey is a nurturing will go on and on. member of Hartford (Conn.) Meeting, an author, and a retired Keep a pad, pencil, and typewriter Old Testament professor. He is handy. There's no telling when a good in his tenth decade. that (Moses' preferred spelling) will surface. Older Friends Respond joyously the fact that our spirits need never grow old! Dorothy Steere is one of the revivers of Radnor What Is the Most (Po.) Meeting and has been a mainstay ofthe life ofthe meeting/or 55 years. She has served on the American Friends Service Committee's personnel commillee and as an AFSC work camp leader. For Important Lesson more than 30 years she and her husband, Douglas Steere, have traveled throughout the world on Life Has Taught You? behalf of Friends. Edwin C. Morgenroth for service at home and overseas, close­ Hiram H. Hilty ness to human tragedy-all these and A few things life has taught me: more have arisen out of accidental oc­ Among the things that have been If the idea is spiritually sound, some­ currences, leading into new illumina­ borne in on me in threescore years and one will arise to sustain it. tion, guided and authenticated by the ten are these: Learning (change) is continuous. If personal religious reflection of those People often do not mean what you think you have finished, you are. who, in Fox's words, gave forth the say. This leads to misunderstandi Guidance (direction) is available. You Scriptures. Never to know what is go­ and even estrangements. cannot design, devise, organize, or plan ing to happen next but to be ready to Our society moves from one o to bring about an answer. Wait. Be ex­ try to make something of it is the key sion to another, some good, some pectant and aware so the moment does to the experience of which Fox spoke good, and some absurd. Good causes not pass you by. ("Divine truth is au­ when he wrote of seeing an infinite merit support, but the wise person seeks nique kind of uncertainty . . . it comes, ocean of light and love that flowed over a position which transcends the transient. if it comes at all, unexpectedly, at some the ocean of darkness and death-and Imagery is of the essence of religion, moment of unknowing, or exile or of that is what Christianity is about. for spiritual truth defies neat formulas. abandonment," E. Lampert.) The person who would mind the Light In 1940 Roger Wilson was fired from the British Do not fear the unknown. ("I have Broadcasting Corporation for being a conscien­ will be eclectic in method, choosing persistent music in me, like water under tious objector. For many years he taught social visual, auditory, or meditative paths ac­ ice, that says warmer days will come, work, education, and social development in Third cording to need. blossom and leaf return again. I live in World universities. He was clerk of London Yearly If, by the grace of God, we manage that, a flimsy enclosure, but the song's Meeting from 1975 to /977. to avert Armageddon for another for singing, not to dread the end," years, we may escape it altogether. De­ Wendell Berry.) Learn to leap forward spite the rhetoric and the problems, "com­ into our past. munism" and "capitalism" are converg­ A retired teacher and psychologist, Edwin C. ing slowly, and as differences diminish, Morgenroth was a founding co-director of Pacific confrontation will become pointless. The Oaks College with his wife, Molly; later, he was seeds of peace are being sown silently in president. He is a former clerk of Pacific Yearly the midst of our present agony. Meeting and has served on the board of Pendle Dorothy Hill, where he has been a student and Friend-in­ Emeritus professor ofSpanish at Guilford College, Residence. Hiram H. Hilty has been active in New York, Steere Cuba, and North Carolina yearly meetings. It is hard to discern one particular most recent publication is Toward Freedom lesson that life has taught me, for I have All: North Carolina Quakers and Slavery. had to learn so much. Perhaps learning to accept has been one of the most im­ portant. To accept one's own inade­ quacies and yet not be downed by them. To try to accept one's gifts with grati­ tude. To accept the limitations of body Roger and mind that stand in the way of ac- ~ Wilson complishments. To accept the Darkness ~ as well as the Light in oneself and in the .1: Daisy In the words of Kenneth Barnes­ world without succumbing to Darkness ~ God is reliable but unpredictable. or failing to trust the Light. To accept © Newman Surprise-whether enjoyable or shat­ the deeps in me that make me certain tering- contributes much more richly to that I am loved by God, as are all other Well, there are a great many impor­ life's discoveries than any amount of persons and life in this universe, and tant lessons life hasn't succeeded in get­ planning. The quality and extent of per­ that we are all interconnected. To try to ting through my head. I still commit sonal relationships, unexpected changes accept death as well as life, realizing that myself to doing twice as much as I was of job and residence, sudden openings they are parts of one whole. To accept able to accomplish when I was half my

4 February 15, /986 FRIENDS JouRNAL present age. And I haven't yet learned Sufferings of London Yearly Meeting, and as long­ Viola E. Purvis how to balance my checkbook. But time chairman ofthe North-West 1652 Commiflee, formerly I struggled until it came out she is known for her insightful introductions to Learning to pray has been the most groups visiting "George Fox country. " right, no matter how long that took. important lesson life has taught me. Now I give up when the difference be­ Because of family influences, when I tween my arithmetic and the bank's is was quite young I discovered how prayer only seven cents. Life has made me protected people and events. As I grew realize that there are better causes to older, and learned to listen in prayer, I devote myself to. experienced, especially through the The chief thing aging has taught me Lord's Prayer, deeper dimensions and is the prevalence of kindness-the kind- ~ lovelier mysteries of life than I ever ness I've received, unexpected and un- .~ dreamed of. Eventually I realized that deserved, right in the midst of the ill will ~ only as I turned to the Lord with a that exists in our world. The love my

FRIENDS JouRNAL February 15, 1986 5 with amusement at that naive assump­ Genevieve B. Cole tion, for I have had a rich, full, in­ credibly interesting life. A Mount Holy­ As I look backward, I see that what oke College alumna returned to speak has mattered most in my life is based on in chapel my junior year there; she sent the word of God speaking through the us into gales of laughter by announcing, Bible. I am grateful for a Christian solemnly: "I have learned to make every family, Sunday school teachers, and by Floyd Schmoe moment a golden unit of efficiency." pastors who have taught me by word This is not a goal I ever want to achieve, and example that "the fear of the Lord y grandchildren ask how it but I have learned to take opportunities is the beginning of wisdom ... a good feels to be 90. What can I say? and to enjoy them. understanding have they that do his M Since I don't "feel" 90, My mother, all too often, asked me commandments . . . blessed is the man how do I know how it feels? to do something to which I replied, "I that feareth the Lord ..." Jesus told True I have lived for 90 years, and don't want to!" Her quiet response was: his disciples to "seek first the Kingdom certainly there has been enough change "Then do it without wanting to!" It was of God." This is where I began at age in me, and in the world of my day, to marvelous advice. I absorbed that from six, seeking the risen Christ. I have validate that fact. On the morning of her. From my father I absorbed his ad­ learned that the decision to commit my September 21 , 1895, there appeared in vice: "Choose to believe that the black way unto him and trust in the guidance the small farm cottage of Ernest and squares on the checker board of life are of his Holy Spirit has brought the Minta Schmoe, in the township of Lex­ on a white background. Not white deepest satisfaction and inner peace. ington, Johnson County, Kansas, a red­ squares on a black background." Regrets are based on those times I failed faced, squalling, man-child to be named to seek God's guidance and went my Floyd, who, if I am correctly informed, Author of several books, including three volumes of poetry, Mary Hoxie Jones has been involved own way. Jesus said, "Every one that grew up to be me. for more than 30 years in sorting and collecting heareth these sayings of mine and doeth On the morning of September 21, the papers of Rufus M. Jones, her father. She has them shall be likened to a man who 1985, I arose from my bed and looked been a research associate for Quaker Studies at builds his house upon a rock." I have in my bathroom mirror. It was me, and Haverford College since 1962. learned that this is Truth. I had changed somewhat. My hair was white, there were bags under my eyes, Genevieve B. Cole has been a librarian at George Fox College and a member of the Peace section I needed a shave; I looked 90. But still J. Floyd Moore ofthe American Friends Service Committee in its I did not "feel" 90. Oregon office. She lives at Friendsview Manor in Other things had changed also. When The dominant factor in the survival Newberg, Oreg., and is a member of Northwest I looked out my window I saw, instead of life seems to be the exertion of some Yearly Meeting, Evangelical Friends Alliance. form of power (force, influence, wealth) of the barns and fields of a Kansas farm, Lake Washington, Seattle's towering over weaker inanimate or animate be­ skyline, and beyond that the snow­ ings. Nevertheless, many of those as­ pects which appear to be characteristic capped Olympics and Cascades of Wash­ of the weaker (vulnerability, kindness, ington State. I was 2,000 miles from the wheat fields of Kansas. patience, altruism), though not entirely Instead of my mother frying ham and absent in the stronger, continue to sur­ vive even when they are subservient to eggs over a wood fire in the kitchen and the dominant forms. my father milking the cows and tending Personal freedom is limited by social the horses in the stable, a Boeing 747 was flying overhead, and my wife was factors, but individuals within and out­ Wilbur side sympathetic groups must decide turning up the rheostat, and tuning in the televised morning news. whether they will exercise their convic­ Kamp Wars are still being fought, people are tions courageously and sacrificially to I am 90 years old and life has taught dying of hunger in Africa, crime is on keep their convictions alive. There is me so many lessons. However, early in the increase in the United States ... constant tension between these two my life I became a disciple of Jesus-a everything is, like me, bigger and worse. views of existence, one in which the con­ learner at his feet. That has been the Things have changed. centration of power diminishes all life; beginning of a life of faith, hope, and one in which it enlarges, whether in the But I still do not feel 90. love for me. I became a disciple of this At my birthday party that afternoon family, politics, economics, or religion. Jesus, and the wisdom of this has been of September 21, 1985, I recalled the The nature, even the existence, of our the most important lesson life has taught planet's future depends upon our choice: story of the celebration of the 100th me. birthday of a Southern mountain man, to diminish or to enlarge. Wilbur Kamp served~ ~tor to Friends churches J. Floyd Moore, now retired, w~ professor ofrelig­ in New York, New England, Indiana, and Wilming­ A long-time member of University (W~h.) Meet­ ious studies at Guilford College. He also taught in ton yearly meetings. As a conscientious objector ing, Floyd Schmoe is perhaps best known for the Friends Boys School in Ramallah (then Pales­ to World War /1 hew~ rele~ed in 1918 to the " Homes for Hiroshima," his project of building tine) and in 1966-67 w~ executive secretary ofthe American Friends Service Committee for recon­ homes in Hiroshima and Nag~aki after 1945. An Friends World Committee for Consultation's struction work in France. His avocation is farm­ author, scientist, artist, and humanitarian, he has Fourth World Conference of Friends. ing and the preservation of small family farms. entered his tenth decade.

6 February 15, 1986 FRIENDS JouRNAL OnB

at which a neighbor rose to remark: "Ah don't know what all this here fuss is about anyhoo . . . all Jake ever done was live to be a hunnert-an it took him a powerful long time to do that." Then I looked about me and saw our children, and their children, and the children of their children . . . more than 40 of them, and I said to myself, and to their mother who was with us in spirit, "Together and with God's help, we did this. These are our children. They are good children and they are beautiful and they are wonderful, and the world is going to be better because of them. We have accomplished something." Then a reporter from the local daily said to me, "You have lived a long time, you have seen much of the world, you have been involved in a dozen wars, and Above, left and right: you have degrees from several univer­ F.ioyd Schmoe as an AFSC worker in France, 1918. could work in her garden, tend her hens, sities . .. what have you learned?" Below: Floyd's 1985 visit to Hiroshima, where he and "put down" jars of fruit and vege­ worked after World War 1/. "Perhaps," I replied, "the most im­ tables for the winter's food supply. portant thing I have learned is that there A few years later when as a high is vastly more to be known than I know, houses. They bore down on us to "come school student I was reading Emerson, that knowledge does not of itself bring to the altar, confess our sins, and be Thoreau, and old John Burroughs more understanding, and that, since there is saved." We would "dwell in the house often than I read the Bible, I began to still such a vast ocean of the unknown, of the Lord forever." think that to know all mysteries-to it is the destiny of man to continually This was painful to me. I remember have total understanding . . . that seek knowledge and to strive for under­ lying awake half the night thinking that would be Paradise enough for me. standing." heavenly mansions on streets of gold I remembered that when I was about When I was a child a wave of "evan­ were not my style. I was sure that Dad six or seven and did "know" a lot and gelism" swept across the Kansas plains, would not like it, and that Mom would had one day been expounding the facts and imported Quaker "evangelists" not enjoy such a life either . . . cer­ of life to my uncle Bill Rice (who never from North Carolina and Indiana held tainly not for "all eternity." went to revival meetings but knew his "revival meetings" each winter at the Dad really enjoyed his horses and Bible better than most preachers did), Hesper and Prairie Center meeting- fields and Mom was happiest when she he looked down at me and said, "Bud­ dy, how cum you know when I kin hardly tell?" And so, at the still not-so-ripe old age of 90, when I go to my bed each night thankful in my heart that I have been given another full day of life, but keenly aware that thereby I am one day nearer my end, I pray for "the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, to lead a life worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God" (Col. I :9-10). So at 90, I feel that though I have at­ tained my adulthood as a human being, and may have, after considerable effort, reached adolescence mentally, I am still an infant spiritually with a great deal of "growing up" yet ahead of me. D

7 "Except for Mirrors and Memories A Conversation With Phyllis Sanders

by Vinton J. Deming of my children. I hope that it will be honored. I think we also ought to be discussing VJD: Phyllis, I just want to ask you what many of us feel and hope: that we about the importance of planning for would like to be at home. If we are really old age. Would you like to say a few terminally ill, why should we be at the things about that? hospital having tubes stuck in if it PS: We now live in a world in which doesn't do any good? These are the things more people are going to grow older that the hospice movement is finding than ever before, so if we're smart we out. We might suggest to people to will plan for that time in our lives. Very check with a nearby hospice and find out soon it may be that there will be five some of the things they're doing, such generations all alive at the same time. as what to do if somebody dies at home. That will be a whole new problem that VJD: What are some very practical we've never had to face before. ways, Phyllis, that older women in par­ A second problem tliat we've never ticular can take more control over their had to face is how separated people have lives? become. It used to be that we all lived PS: Well, those women of my genera­ within a few blocks of our relatives. It tion, who got married right after World really didn't matter how long we lived. War II, are saying to our daughters, We could stay in our house and we "Do something you really enjoy doing; could see our relatives and they could learn a skill so you can earn money. see us. But when, in one family, children Then if you get married and have a are living in different states across the family, keep one finger in the world that country, the problem of care for those you enjoy so that if anything happens of us who grow older becomes more and at any point you can get more involved more difficult. to plan while we're healthy and young and continue." This means that we One of the realities is that women are enough to plan, and not wait until some should have a resume prepared which going to outlive men by eight to ten disaster overcomes us. We should dis­ shows how we have been active. years. In the year 2000 all the oldest cuss now, while our health is good, In my generation the plan was you people are going to be women. We things like how I can control my living found a man and you married him and women had better start planning for or my dying; things like what I can do you dropped everything and you went how we are going to live in that society. to be assured that when I am too ill to where he was-that's what l did. I was And since women are also hit with the take care of myself that some things an administrator, and I left my job in greatest poverty, this is an added might be guaranteed. the East and went to Texas to live. problem. For instance, I would not like to con­ Fortunately, I was married to a man I think of three women I know who tinue living as a vegetable somewhere. who needed a woman who could work are part of three couples, very good It would not be a good thing for me, and along with him, and so I felt like we friends. If anything happens and they I think it would be disastrous for my were doing a job together. At one time are eventually left alone, they are going family, the cost and the care-and for I actually ran the AFSC office in Texas to move into a house together. That's what? For nothing. So we should know for seven months while Olcutt was the smart planning. But for some of us who about things like living wills. We should interim director for a program in are alone and don't have an arrange­ be working toward making it possible France. And there were ·times that he ment of that kind, we must think where for people to say, "This is what I took over the family of five children so we are going to move, what we are going want." It's a smart thing to think ahead that I could go to the Soviet Union. So to do, and our problem often becomes so that there's no question in anybody's I was not a typical wife of that gener­ our children's problem. It's important mind that the person who's handling ation. Many women of my generation, your finances is also deciding whether however, didn't finish school, or never Vinton Deming, a member ofCentral Philadelphia or not to pull the plug on you, you had a job of any kind, or wanted to get (Pa.) Meeting, is editor-manager of the JoURNAL. Phyllis Sanders is also a member ofCentral Phila­ know. I have appointed one of my chil­ back to work when their children got out delphia Meeting. Her husband, Olcutt Sanders, dren to do that, and I have made copies of school-but their husbands said, was editor of the JouRNAL when he died in 1983. of the form and have given them to each "Not my wife; people will think that I

8 February /5, /986 FRIENDS JouRNAL can't take care of my family with my welfare. Fortunately, her 60th birthday have discovered that a woman alone is money.'' So these women would not go will come in three months and she will a potential threat to women who are against their husbands; they said that be able to get Social Security. This married or who have a man. The impli­ would be just too demoralizing to him. "widows' gap" is one of the things that cation is that a woman alone is not really We now are saying to our young women have not adequately planned for. complete and is out to get somebody. women that not only will they outlive VJD: Ever since I've known you, She's looking for somebody and you men (not all women, but a lot of wom­ Phyllis, I've seen you as someone who better watch out. en will) but also they never know when plans well. When you became a widow I also discovered, I think, that for an accident can leave them without a two-and-a-half years ago I'm sure you women generally, society, Friends meet­ husband. Also, the divorce rate has learned some new things about yourself. ings, and other groups just assume that grown so high that there are many wom­ Perhaps you could share some of this she can take care of herself. The woman en being suddenly left alone after 40 with us. is supposed to be the homemaker, and years of marriage. Olcutt and I were PS: Well, I did some reading-The so what's different? She's in her home, married 37 years, and I find that trying Grieving Time was helpful [see Re­ she's got her kitchen, she did things to live alone after 37 years of living as sources on page 38]. I soon discovered before like that, so she's okay. Whereas part of a couple has taken some working that we live in a society that's made for a man becomes everybody's concern. at. You have to sort of think to yourself couples; and when you're part of a That poor man can't cook for himself again and ask, "What was I like before couple you do things together as a so there's a lot of casseroles and a lot I was married? What were the things couple in terms of social gatherings and of taking care of the poor man who is that I did that I really wanted?" everything else. And when you're one left alone. The reality is that men tend What women have to realize is that at person, suddenly there just aren't those to remarry very fast after widowhood any point they may be caught in a di­ social gatherings. I don't think it's delib­ and divorce, and women don't. Seventy­ lemma. I'm concerned about the group erate, but it's a little confusing for five percent of men are married-older of women who weather widowhood (the people who are having a dinner party. men-and only 23 percent of women. average age of widowhood is 56, which They wonder whether to invite the I learned something else about loss, is fairly late). A woman who may have woman alone, and they wonder what and that is that it's not only the loss of been a full-time homemaker until her other person to invite to make it the person alone, but it's the loss of husband's death is not entitled to get her balanced-meaning, is there another history. husband's Social Security until she is at single man to make the party complete? VJD: I know that your career in least 60, and then she gets the minimum. What is interesting is that this doesn't broadcasting has become a very impor­ I have a friend whose husband died happen with men. If a man's alone, tant thing to you. when she was 56. (He was older and was whether widowed or divorced, people PS: Yes. I started on radio and televi­ already on Social Security.) She said the can always include an extra man in a sion 14 years ago. In 1972 there weren't first year she went through their savings dinner party and not have to have many women doing news on television and the last three years she's been on another woman. Women all through life or radio. I saw that women were doing things, but there was nobody my age. I Phyllis Sanders with her family, 1957. started in New York at age 52, and learned on the job. I figured I was smart and could learn, so I did. What I was pleased about was that when people would tune in the program they could see an older woman. Women, just like men, have got to see a role model. Tele­ vision is so powerful now. Whatever is on television is assumed to be factual and important. And whatever isn't there, by implication, isn't important or we'd have seen it. The first program I did on aging was in New York City on WNBC TV. They had a program called "The Prime of Your Life," and I was the regular commentator for four years. Arlene Francis was the host. I chose the title for the TV series I did in Philadelphia, "Growing Older in Style." I also made it clear to the pro­ ducers that I was the host of the pro­ gram, not a hostess. They said, "Why aren't you?" I said, "Hostesses serve coffee and tea. I'm not serving coffee or buns-I'm a host. I direct this

FRIENDS JouRNAL February 15, 1986 9 discussion." It meant that when people watched that program they had to look at an older woman and they had to listen to what I thought was important. In this series we tried to talk about different aspects of growing older, saying that there are some good tricks that will help, like health and exercise, and food and finances. And also some good news as well as the bad. I think it's good news to say to peo­ ple, "You aren't going to change; you're going to be the same person." I think of myself as whatever age I was when I felt I was most in control. That's the way I feel inside. But as somebody has said, and I love this quote, "Except for mirrors and memories I feel as if I were the same, 18 or 20." But it's those mirrors that make you feel down, and you say, "Oh dear, I don't look like that!" The memories, which is what you never had when you were 20, that's the good thing. You've done all that living, so you know you're not 19 or 20. PS: Well, I'm guessing. I know that alone and need some kind of help? There's a lot of good news, too, like overseers in my own meeting, Central Our meetings must learn to think of the fact that we can have control of our Philadelphia, for instance, appoint the people who may have the most dis­ health if we are careful about what we somebody to be your friendly overseer advantageous situations and anticipate eat, careful about how we exercise. who keeps in touch with you, and that's their needs, and not wait until such VJD: What are some of your goals for very nice. But I think the friendly over­ people pick up the phone and call us. the next few years? seer plan is likely to be a more formal Because when you are down, you do not PS: It's a good question. We say to and structured thing. I'm talking about pick up the phone. everybody, make a five-year plan. And, a buddy as more one-to-one, somebody VJD: What is it that's very special about you know, I haven't made one yet. I who would know when you were com­ being an older person? would like to do more broadcasting. I ing to meeting, when you were not com­ PS: Well, I think it's the years of ex­ guess my goal would be to continue to ing to meeting; would know when you perience. I'm richer by five children, try to represent a group of women who were sick; would know when you were richer by having had a good husband, have been forgotten, ignored, and hurt doing something. richer by having traveled and lived in unjustly. And that's the reason I'm de­ What happens as you get older is that different places. So in that sense I'm lighted to be doing something on "Mod­ your needs may be greater and the un­ richer. I also have leisure in a sense. I ern Maturity," a national program on willingness to share them may be great­ guess I'm not quite that old, but they say aging being produced now on public er. It's a lot easiser to ask for help when that when you're 80 you begin to say, television. you're young and say, "Oh, I can't do "Age makes no difference, I can say VJD: Do you think Friends are doing that quickly, help me"-that's okay. anything, I can do anything." I can't better than others in addressing them­ But when you get older you begin to say, quite get to that point yet. We all go selves to the problems of aging? "I'm already a burden on everybody through life and we say, "Well, I'd like PS: I don't tl)ink so. I think Quakers are and I don't want to start acting needy." to do such and such, but I don't think very much a product of our society. I think meetings ought to have some way I can because I have children at home. Even Quaker families or individuals of knowing, especially about their older I'm not free to go." As an older person may,. well have the same hang-ups, even members. I am free to go wherever I want. in relationships between husbands and And I think it would be good for When I was talking to the people in wives. I think Friends need to do a little meetings to plan discussion groups. Washington about doing this TV spot thinking ahead, too. We should be dis­ We're hoping to have one at my meet­ for the Roving Reporter, I was asked, cussing ways in which we can be more ing on what things would be helpful to "Would you be free to go to Florida?" sensitive to the needs of our older mem­ know about aging. And the discussion I said, "Sure!" I don't have to ask my bers, people who may be virtually alone should focus on more than just retire­ children, I don't have to ask a husband, with maybe the meeting as their only ment homes. Some of us may never end I'm free to do it. close contact, and their children are far up in a retirement home. It isn't for You're free to pick up and go if away. I'd like to see some kind of buddy everybody. But if a retirement home is you've kept your health and if you have system. not for you, what provisions do you have the money to travel. So it's important VJD: How would that work? for the time when you may be absolutely for us to plan and prepare ourselves. 0

10 February 15, 1986 FRIENDS Jou RNAL Have Minute, Will Travel by Norma Jacob or the fascination of being taken by boat I had a room to myself and a private each day to the Kennedy Library on the phone, but that was highly unusual; as mainland for a week-long course which a rule it's dormitory life with one or gave us an inside view of what the insti­ more roommates and the bathroom ome Friends who have reached or tution of the presidency is all about. down the hall. Food is generally good passed retirement age may now There were tears in the eyes of some of and the intellectual stimulation is tre­ Sfind themselves with considerably us as we parted from our teachers, some mendous. The instructors are almost al­ more time but rather less money. If their of them veterans of the Kennedy admin­ ways young-our Russian friend was the desire for new experiences is unquenched, istration, and our new friends. exception there-and they make it clear the way for them to satisfy it at a sur­ Nor shall I forget the course on Push­ that they are enjoying contact with such prisingly low cost is through Elderhostel. kin, taught by an elderly man who told an unusual group of students. Freed Not long ago I was privileged to hear us how he had arrived on campus as a from the need for tests and grading, the about the beginnings of the Elder hostel penniless refugee without a word of instructors can indulge their creativity, idea from one of those most directly in­ English and had moved steadily upward and it's astonishing how much they are volved, a man whom many Quakers from janitor to head of the department able to communicate in just an hour and might recognize as in some ways a of Russian. Or the class on our debt to a half on five successive days. kindred soul. To hear him tell it, he was classical Greece, where it turned out that Elderhostels run from Sunday to Sat­ wandering through Germany with a one of our fellow students was a profes­ urday and the cost is under $200 this rucksack when he fell in with a group sor of Greek. She and the instructor had year. And by adding a day at each end of older people who were systematically a marvelous time indulging in scholarly of the trip, you could visit two new digging up parking lots and planting badinage and writing on the blackboard Friends meetings. A fine way to do this grass and flowers. They did this because in hellenic characters, while the rest of and save money as well is to procure a they believed there was too much as­ us, caught up in their enthusiasm, ea­ copy of the Directory for Traveling phalt and too few public parks-and by gerly drank it all in. Friends published by Friends General the time the local municipality had got Then there was the course on Herman Conference. When you've decided what itself organized to stop them, they had Melville's Biliy Budd, an extraordinary new area of Quakerdom you would like moved on to another town. The world­ story full of things to provoke hard to explore (Canada, Europe, even Aus­ wide movement today is exceedingly thinking among pacifists. And the one tralia) and have chosen the campus law-abiding, but one can still catch an on astronomy, where we all learned to in that part of the world with the most iconoclastic gleam in its eye. This is a build our own astrolabes and, at least tempting offerings, then look to see if group of people who are saying, "If you in theory, became able to locate and you can find in some nearby city a listing thought we had retired from active identify almost every visible star. Last for a Quaker family who, with sufficient interest in the world-think again." year I was tempted to go to West Vir­ advance notice, will be happy to wel­ Things have come my way in the past ginia and learn how to make and play come you as an overnight guest. Re­ few years which have enriched me more a mountain dulcimer, but the spirit of warding and lasting new friendships are than I could have believed. What was adventure won out and instead I went made that way. perhaps the most rewarding vacation to Nantucket to join a group of people Just one suggestion may be in order: week of my whole life was spent on an who rode around on bicycles studying if it is summer and you do not find it island in Boston Harbor. Never mind the natural history of the seashore. easy to sleep in a hot room, especially that the temperature when we arrived This year, in Texas, it was minicom­ with a roommate whom you have never was 100 degrees and the dormitories puters. From a wonderfully patient met before, take along a fan, or better uncooled except for sea breezes, or that instructor with a roomful of 15 begin­ yet, choose from the catalogue a campus jets bound for Logan Airport at certain ners, I learned to operate a word pro­ where it is stated that dormitories are times of day went over just above roof cessor and can now say with confidence air-conditioned. The catalogue will also level at three-minute intervals. No such that I don't want one in my life, though list local places of interest and oppor­ trifling inconveniences could take away it is agreeable to know better what the tunities for sports of various kinds. from the pleasure of making new friends younger generation is talking about. So wait no longer for adventure, older To be an Elderhosteler, one needs to Friends. Write to Elderhostel, 80 Boyl­ A retired social worker and author oftwo Pendle be at least 60, but there is no upper limit ston Street, Boston, MA 02116, for a Hill pamphlets, Norma Jacob lives at Kendal at Longwood in Kennett Square, Pa., and is a mem­ and hostelers in their 80s are by no copy of their current listing, and also to ber of Kendal Meeting. She is on the JouRNAL's means uncommon. One does have to be FGC for a new travel directory. The board of managers. a little bit adaptable, however. In Texas world lies open before you. 0

FRIENDS JouRNAL February 15, 198~ 11 At Friends House in Santa Rosa, California Living in the Present by Elizabeth Folger Boardman n this world of sin and sorrow, the When people actually come to Friends Some were able to go home because most fortunate of us have shelter and House, of course, they begin to see how they could continue, during the day, to I health, enough to eat and drink, and wrong they were. No one wears gray; get nursing and therapeutic care through a little extra for recreation. We also have there are people of all ages, very few of our adult day health program, which work which allows us to put our faith whom are dying; and the rare crotchety people attend five or six hours a day, into practice and gives us a rich feeling folks are among our favorites. There is from two to five days a week. (This is of meaning and fulfillment. much, much more which is positive. a new venture designed to reduce the I am a person with such good fortune. Friends House has 50 apartments for necessity for institutional care for frail But people often hear of my work with about 60 people. Half the residents are people by making it possible for them dismay. "You run a nursing home? You Quakers or friends of Friends. Almost to live at home.) mean one of those places where every­ all are over 65 . Meals, interdependence, Being administrator of Friends House one is dying?" "You are administrator emergency assistance, group decision lets me put into practice most tenets of of an adult day health service? Whoever making, cultural and political activities, my faith, which combines Quaker and heard of that?" "You are really an gardening, and parties are all patt of the humanistic existentialist beliefs and apartment landlord, fixing the plumb­ scenario. Ages, background, physical idealism. ing and dunning people for the rent? condition, and personalities vary greatly Roman Catholics most often use the And it's all crotchety old people?" to make for a rich interchange in all expression "vocation." For me, having The only good reaction I get is when arenas. (So much for the gruesome task a vocation has meant that from my early people hear that Friends House in Santa of being a landlord!) youth way has opened, often unexpected­ Rosa, California, which incorporates Friends House has a 30-bed skilled ly, preparing me for the responsibilities these three services, is run by Quakers. nursing service with a dual emphasis on I now have; that there was an intense ex­ "Oh, we have heard of them. They are rehabilitation and terminal care. Most perience of "calling" when I sat " quak­ honest, good people who wear gray, don't clients come from the town of Santa ing" over this same typewriter eight drink or swear, and help the poor.'' Rosa, but some Quakers have come years ago, writing out the dream of the from quite a distance, and apartment College Park Quarterly Meeting's Com­ Elizabeth Folger Boardman has been with Friends mittee on Aging which led to Friends House since its inception. A member of Davis residents are in and out often. In the (Calif.) Meeting, she attends Redwood Forest first year of operation, 60 percent of the House; and that the work uses all my Meeting in Santa Rosa, Calif. She has written a clients got well and went home. (So talents. It is a blessing to have such a number of articles on the elderly. much for "everyone is dying.") vocation.

Meals, interdependence, cultural and political activities, gardening, and parties are all part of the scenario.

12 February 15, 1986 FRIENDS JouRNAL Friends House was built with money vivaciousness or joy. We are doing this daughters, nephews, men as well as wom­ raised in imaginative ways, and it is at Friends House. en, often very frail people themselves. operated according to a stringent budget The crux of it all, however, is helping The public is distressed at the idea of consistent with the Quaker tradition of to change the U.S. perception of ex­ adults becoming dependent and child­ frugality. Analyzing line items on finan­ treme old age, something that is ''revo­ like. But for all things there is a season cial reports is not a totally dry and prag­ lutionary" in my view. Here are some and in all things a virtue. When people's matic activity when there is that little " revolutionary" ideas: body functions break down and they glow of Quakerly good stewardship The very old are the truly liberated need help with the most personal mat­ about it. people. They are substantially free of the ters, an intimacy develops between them Long-term services for elderly people compulsions of the young and middle­ and their assistants which is quite an have been mismanaged and misused and aged: to make a good impression, to antidote for the famed anomie of U.S. are now very heavily regulated by gov­ make a living, to live up to someone society. When a relative is dying gradu­ ernment agencies. An improved knowl­ else's standards, to keep a spouse hap­ ally and we share the family's slow edge of the governmental constraints, py, to keep busy, to "be happy." The loss over the days and weeks, a bond particularly the financial ones, within older you get, the more these frenetic grows between staff and family, and which services for the elderly try to func­ among staff members, which can reduce tion, would be good for Friends every­ our individual sense of loneliness. where to have. We could use your polit­ From some The only real problem about institu­ ical help. tional care for chronically ill people Basic to Friends faith and practice is (when it is done right) has to do not with the idea of promoting social equality. spiritual source the way in which residents are treated Any health care service has a wide varie­ but with the way the staff is paid. Much ty of tasks to be done, so there are dai­ comes a drive of the work at Friends House is done by ly opportunities to carry out employ­ poorly educated people who are poorly ment practices toward this end. We have to incorporate paid according to an economic system male nurse aids doing a top-star job at which we cannot ignore but must strive "women's work," and our yardman is a to change. These people often deal with woman. Many people, especially young the fact of death staggering problems at home and then mothers, work part time, share jobs, or come to work to do hard tasks for ill rotate from one job to another. The age into my life, people with anxious families. range of our staff is from 15 to 68, and Death is a word like love, a word too the racial and social background is richly without any small to accommodate the many varied varied. We hire handicapped and homo­ experiences it tries to represent. The sexual persons. Despite our substantial reduction of death which scares us all is untimely, or differences, we work together quite • • violent, or pain-ridden. In a skilled nurs­ smoothly, working through disagree­ ing facility, no death is violent, almost ments with direct discussion, seeking VIVaCIOUSness all deaths are timely, and few are pain­ consensus on difficult issues, reducing • ridden. At Friends House, it is a matter to a minimum any sense of hierarchy. or JOy. of skill, love, and pride that we can act It is a treat for an idealistic Quaker to as "crossing guard" to help make the work in such a situation. concerns fade away and you begin to vital experience of dying as easy and ap­ An important teaching from many re­ have time to observe. Our elders at propriate and graceful as possible for ligious traditions is to "live in the pres­ Friends House watch us younger work­ our patients and their families. ent." Perhaps this is one characteristic ing people all the time, mostly without And it is a matter of pride among us of a vocation. Certainly in a job as in­ judgment, which has a reassuringly that we accommodate these events with­ tense as this one, there is no chance of grounding effect on us. in a general atmosphere of liveliness and whiling away the time in regrets or It is only a myth that in the United enthusiasm and fun. The place is full of fantasies. States we "dump" our elderly in nurs­ young people, mostly staff, some volun­ Similarly, the ideal of letting go of ing homes. Many people who spend teers, some kids. The first thing you see those matters that you cannot control is time in nursing homes do not have rela­ as you come up the drive is a basketball well encouraged at Friends House, where tives- remember that some 10 percent net; as you come in the door, a Ping­ staff and residents alike must be respon­ of our population never produce chil­ Pong table, often in use; as you cross sive to the unpredictable acts of fate dren and that many others outlive their the airy lobby, a calendar with parties, which determine who is well, who gets children. Most people in nursing homes classes, cultural events, and meetings well again, and who is now ready to have been cared for in the family home every day. Residents say it is like living move on. It is a spiritually sound stance, by spouses and "children" in their 60s on a college campus, there is so much easier to maintain in this context than, for heroically long periods of time, and intellectually stimulating activity going for example, in work with the young. these relatives continue to play a very on. Friends House is a sort of intention­ From some spiritual source comes a important role during the nursing home al community, where we, staff and resi­ drive to incorporate the fact of death in­ stay. We observe these loving and stal­ dents, share our abilities and needs in a to my life, without any reduction of wart people daily- wives, husbands, way which benefits us all. 0

FRIENDS Jou RNAL February 15, 1986 13 thetic to the idea, started organizing, fundraising, and looking for a suitable site. They set forth the following ob­ jectives in keeping with Quaker ideals: The community should have people of all ages and faiths living together in har­ mony; respect for the rights of all indi­ viduals; management by consensus and cooperation; mutual support in day-to­ day living; concern for peace and a non­ violent environment; simple, practical structures and energy conservation; near­ by availability of skilled medical and nursing care; and outreach aimed to im­ prove conditions locally and beyond. :;- In 1974 a level site of 86 acres was ~ located in North Easton (now called f Friends Crossing). With the approval of - New England Yearly Meeting, an inde- pendent corporation, Friends Commu­ nity Development Corporation, was formed and work proceeded on the project. The land was purchased, archi­ Preparing for tects were hired, and a construction management team got to work. Retaining equity in one's own home the Later Years was felt to be more desirable than in­ vesting in a life-care community of just elderly people. Accepting Medicare cov­ hope was that a caring community could erage for illness and obtaining supple­ by Irven Roberts be developed by Friends to meet the mentary health insurance were consid­ need for support in those later years. ered more economical over the long ow do we prepare for old age? When revered Friend Daisy Newman term. Hospitals and nursing homes were New England Friends were pointed out that she would not want to to be within easy reach. H asking this in 1971 , when they live in a community of just old folks, the Ground was broken in November held a workshop on " Retirement idea of an all-age community was 1978, and the first homes were occupied Needs" at yearly meeting, and obtained adopted with great enthusiasm. The con­ in December 1979. Of the 56 homes approval to send a questionnaire to the sensus was that people should be able to built, 23 were bought by Friends. A new entire membership. The results showed stay in their own home with supporting Quaker meeting was established, and what might be expected from Yankees: people and services nearby, with the Friends work together for the safety and they wanted to be independent. They warmth of understanding neighbors, well being of all residents. Togetherness didn't want to be moved to a rest home and the fellowship with people of all is evidenced in sharing of meals, social or a nursing home when they grew old. ages and faiths. times, transportation, and maintenance At yearly meeting in 1972, another During the next two years, another ad chores. And the presence of young peo­ workshop reviewed the questionnaire hoc committee gathered those sympa- ple helps keep the community lively! 0 responses, and recommended that an ad hoc committee be set up to go into the matter further. It was found that Friends were willing to think ahead and to plan for their retirement years, but they didn't want to leave their own homes and neighbors. The thought then arose that Friends should get settled into a new community before they reached retirement so that they wouldn't be up­ rooted when they started to fail. The

A member ofNo rth Easton (Mass.) Meeting, Irven Roberts has been an administrator of hospitals and of homes f or the elderly. He is on the maintenance and safety committee at Friends Crossing.

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- :'- -..~)~ ~ l_. • • • "'' A House l of One's Own ~ L------~ by Phyllis F. Agard vegetable garden, fruits, berries, and ing at, or have many fond memories at­ flowers. tached to. We are planning for the yard e love having our own house. But as we grow older, the questions to do double duty or simplify work: We enjoy feeling we can paint keep confronting us: when will the shrubs and ground cover will eliminate W the front door purple if we pleasure stop outweighing the work? mowing the bank, a hedge bears rasp­ want to without asking anyone first. We How can we adapt present housing to berries, a foundation planting bears have a big old farmhouse which was changing needs? At what point will we blueberries, flowering shrubs and peren­ once on the edge of town and now is in need something easier to take care of? nials largely take care of themselves, and the center (so much do New England What should the next step in housing raised vegetable beds will be easier on towns grow in 100 years), and we have ourselves be? stiffening backs. Admittedly these chang­ always done our own remodeling, main­ We began by simplifying our home es take a lot of work to introduce, but we tenance, and repairs (having learned life. Periodically (birthdays are good expect them to pay off later. how partly because of necessity during times) we look over our possessions and We are trying to train ourselves to hire periods of marginal income). We live on ask ourselves whether we have used help to do jobs that years ago we would the first tloor and rent two apartments them in the last two or three years. If have done ourselves without hesitation. upstairs, which pays for heat and taxes we haven't, why are we moving them, When, five years ago, it became obvi­ and makes our housing costs almost dusting them, polishing them, building ous that we would never get around to zero. We have a big yard, old trees, a shelves to hold them? Each time a few climbing up on the roof to repair a more things go to the children, the furni­ crumbling chimney, we bowed to the Phyllis F. Agard's avocation is home design and ture exchange, the tag sale, the survival march of years and called in a mason. the remodeling of houses with her husband. A member of Mount Toby (Mass.) Meeting, she is center, the "take it or leave it" section We finally had the rest of the gutters active on the New England Yearly Meeting's Com­ at the town dump. What we keep we use replaced (the ones we hadn't yet done mittee on Aging. constantly, take great pleasure in look- ourselves). A young carpenter friend has

FRIENDS JouRNAL February 15, 1986 15 just installed our new kitchen sink and our self-sufficiency evaluation: Consider how much fun you are having, counter; while she worked I wrote let­ as well as how well you are managing. I ters to our daughters. Sometimes this Can I (or we) handle the following, or think this is very, very important. Natu­ arrange to have them done for us, or ar­ rally you want to feel that you are han­ approach strikes a snag because many range exchanges? (These are not neces­ dling your activities of daily living, and contractors don't really want to bother sarily goals to be reached; they are for it is difficult to have fun if these are ill­ with small jobs. They would come in a help in answering these questions: How managed or-burdensome, but I would like minute to replace our vast roof, but who near to this goal are we, or how far away? to see a category which assesses how wants to re-roof just the bay window? How does our performance compare with much positive pleasure you are getting out Our carpenter friend has suggested a a year ago? five years ago? And, as we of life, as well as how adequately you are whole new approach to repairs. She pro­ get into our 70s and 80s, how self-suf­ performing. poses contracting with older home­ ficient are we? At what point will others The overall criteria are extremely owners to be their inspector and re­ need to take over, and in which areas?) demanding. I would like to see the time pairer. For a moderate retainer, she Personal cleanliness and grooming: in my life when I don't dress in sloppy take baths regularly, wash and cut hair, clothes unnecessarily; make doctor and would agree to inspect the house with cut nails, shave, keep up a presentable dentist appointments; write letters once the owners-perhaps twice a year-and appearance. a month, do my income tax (before April together they would settle on the work Medication and physical therapy: take 15), keep my quarters clean and in repair; needed, its probable cost, and the prescribed medication without forgetting do washing, ironing, and mending; use priorities. Then she would either do the or doubling up on doses; manage own hot supplements wisely; take care of yard and work herself or find contractors to do baths, warm packs, exercises, etc.; get garden; dispose of trash; and keep in it at the going rate. prescriptions refilled; make and keep doc­ shape. What paragons are you hoping to Other arrangements for helping us to tors and dentist appointments. be in your declining years? live longer in our own home have oc­ Communications: make phone calls I think year by year we need to assess curred to us: a high school student to and write letters appropriately;. keep in what all the daughters are doing, and touch with people. what we would like to do to be of help. come in once a week to help with all Transportation: drive car safely and If only your various offspring would set­ heavy lifting, carrying, reaching, and keep it in repair; get to grocery and other tle down and get stable perhaps you climbing jobs (our own daughters did stores; use bus, plane, taxi, Senior Sur­ would feel less obligated to manage your this for an elderly friend when they were rey as needed. aging without relying on us to take up the young); a housekeeping aide, available Finances: do own banking, invest­ slack (at least, in your letter I sense an through our local senior center; some­ ments, income tax. Is income adequate to avoidance of the possibility of eventual­ one to mow, rake leaves, paint, shovel meet needs? Are bills paid regularly? ly needing to rely on us). I know we seem snow; professional services for house­ Housekeeping: keep quarters clean and awfully unreliable, but I think any of us cleaning, income tax, trash removal, in repair, especially bathroom and kitch­ individually or all of us collectively could transportation; a grocery store that en; move furniture for cleaning; keep and would come through when needed­ closets orderly. even if it meant reassessing how far apart takes phone orders and delivers; a Clothing care: keep up on washing, we are living. (For instance, we might very clothes dryer and a self-cleaning oven; mending, dry cleaning. Buy new clothes well want to consider whether one of us family, neighbors, meeting. With any as needed. could come to live in the house with you, luck, we might find a tenant who would Nutrition: cook properly planned if there was a need for that.) exchange some services for rent. The im­ meals, clean up, buy groceries, use food portant thing is to remain open to all supplements realistically, control weight. After that, I added one more query: these possibilities and to look for more. House and yard: take care of yard and What satisfying projects are we involved To help with our planning, several garden, if any; keep house painted and in? Are we enjoying life? How much fun years ago I developed a set of "queries" in repair; get firewood. are we having? designed to keep us and our children Rubbish removal: dispose of trash or What is the next step? It depends on arrange to have it collected; throw out or our condition at the time. If we are aware of our degree of self-sufficiency recycle bottles, paper, etc.; avoid ac­ over the coming years. I was impelled merely low in energy or strength but still cumulation of junk. Keep attic and cellar reliable in personal and medical care, partly by having watched my husband's weeded out. parents live on together in their own Pet care: feeding, bathing, vet. perhaps a condominium, where others home, becoming less and less able to Physical and emotional condition: walk would do yard care and maintenance. If cope, with no modifications and no to stores, climb stairs, deal with unfamil­ we become less reliable about personal plans for the future, until at last they iar situations, use good judgment, keep and medical care and diet, using availa­ could obviously no longer remain where in touch with outside affairs and people. ble visiting nurse and home health aide services might be an answer, or possibly they were. They had long since passed The first set of queries we mailed the stage where they could have planned a convalescent home, or supervision by brought a quick response, and made me daughters in our home or theirs. realistically for their own needs, and the very proud of the children we have decision had to be taken out of their It may be very hard to learn to accept raised. One in particular is worth others' judgment about our needs, but hands. So now each year we answer our quoting: queries briefly and mail them to our we recognize this as something we must four daughters. (How did we ever man­ Watch tendency to file things (even ag­ work on. One of our girls once told us: age before copying machines?) Some ing evaluations in aging fi le). Leads too "Don't forget that we are always there day we will begin to ask them to do the easily to tendency to keep old hearing aid for you, just as when we were small you same when they are visiting us. Here is batteries in box labeled "old batteries." were always there for us." 0

16 February 15, /986 FRIENDS JOURNAL on more than one occasion. It would be easy to blame them and think them greedy and out for a buck. But that would only serve to put off what has to be done anyway: accept the fact that next year at this time the bulldozers will be gone, the house will be gone, the yard, gardens, well pump, garage, mock orange bushes, bridal wreath bushes, hydrangea bushes, and birdbath will all be gone. I will never again be able to walk through the front door, sleep in the. front bedroom, walk downstairs in the morning, lie on the back porch, or walk in the back yard. I will never again hear the sounds and smell the smells of that house. There will be no more Christ­ mases there. No one seeing the spot for the first time will have any idea that a simple white frame house, more than 100 years old, once stood there, and that only two families ever lived in it. Our family was the second and last, and four generations of us have called it home. Another building will have its address. And, amazingly, as I begin to accept all that, I am left with the clear feeling that even when all visible signs of our family's house are gone, it doesn't mat­ ter. The things that matter are these: No one can ever take away our expe­ riences and memories of life in that house. I've heard people say similar things before, but now the thought has much deeper meaning to me. I will always bear our house inside me Things That Matter, because it is more than a building. The building is only a shell, like my body, and the house's life has meaning because and Bulldozers of the living that took place inside it, just as our souls are our real homes, not by Cheri Junk a high-rise condominium. The condos our bodies or anything we can build. No had been closing in for 15 years until all bulldozer can destroy that. that was left of a block once full of My grandmother, sister, and mother ur family home has been sold. large, lovely turn-of-the century homes are free of the house's burden on them. My grandmother is a brave and were three of those homes at the end of They are wise to part with anything O thoughtful 83-year-old wom­ the block. Two of them were vacated material which becomes too much of a an-brave enough to realize that, even and then bulldozed, to be replaced by burden. though she had lived there for 79 years, condominiums which will be right next We all cried together when I went the house had become too much of a door to where my grandmother's house home to say good-bye to the house. And burden for her, and thoughtful enough stands. Hers is the last house left. And I will, for a very long time, be unwill­ to want to sell it now so that my mother, who wants to look at a seven-story ing to drive past the condo which will my sister, and I would not have to bear condo after a lifetime of watching birds stand in its place. I will feel a great loss, that burden after she is gone. in the birdbath, listening to bees hum in as if the bulldozers have violated some­ The most difficult part is that the the bridal wreath bushes, and seeing thing very precious to me. But that's all house has been sold to a real estate com­ your neighbor, through the kitchen win­ right. I am glad to have to go through pany and will be leveled to make way for dow, washing dishes at night? No seven­ this process of letting go of what doesn't story condo can even come close to that. matter. How awful it must be to grow Recording clerk of Durham (N.C.) Meeting, Cheri Junk works as on administrative secretary at Duke The temptation is to rant and rail at up in a house that is easy to say good­ University Medical Center. Her article fvst appeared the real estate men. I have even been bye to. And because God's presence is in the Durham Meeting Newsletter, November 1985. guilty of calling them highway robbers real, my peace and trust are real. 0

FRIENDS JOURNAL February 15, 1986 17 Whose Death Is It, Anyway?

expensive drugs, and the ever-increasing that we are here because Kendal­ by Emily T. Wilson and exorbitantly costly diagnostic and Crosslands provides us the opportunities surgical procedures that might make us for learning the lessons we still need for t's mine-it's yours-it's everyone's. more comfortable, and perhaps prolong our growth, and it is where we can find No one who has ever lived has ever our lives for a little while, when we the joy and companionship and love I escaped, but I'd like to start by talk­ realize that the professional skills and that bless our lives. ing about life-about the meanings and hospital facilities and financial resources And now to the subject of the living purposes our long lives have given us the involved might better be used for will. I am glad it is so named. It is not opportunity to discover, about the deci­ younger, needier people with their lives called the dying will. Its name implies sions we may have come to realize were still ahead of them? Do we think about that it is the living during our terminal of increasing importance to us, and the fact that Medicare costs for the illness that is the important thing. For about our responsibilities to our families elderly are an enormous percentage of those of you who are not familiar with it, and those we love, both here and else­ the funds that are available for the this document states that you do not wish where, and to Kendal-Crosslands where health care of the entire population, and any heroic measures used to prolong we are free, and encouraged, to live our that the aging population is growing at your life. We have to think about several lives as we please, while being protected an explosive rate? things long before we reach this stage. and cared for as needs arise. The great rabbi Martin Buber wrote We must consider our loved ones. Do According to the sages of all time, the that, at any time, we are where we are we want to spare them unnecessary older years are supposed to be the time supposed to be. I interpret that to mean anguish by refusing to demand all kinds for acquiring wisdom. We've gone of artificial means to prolong our lives? through the difficult and exciting years Are we sure they agree with our decision of youth and preparation, the busy and that the quality, not the quantity, of life demanding middle years of family and is the important thing? Are there areas of career responsibilities and satisfactions, what Elisabeth Kubler-Ross calls "un­ and now we have the time and the op­ finished business" in our lives that we portunity to put that other area of our ought to settle while there is yet time? lives in order-to rethink our values, Have we made our peace with ourselves and refine our spirits, and search for the and our God? satisfactions that can be ours when we No one has ever died and returned to come to terms with our inner selves, our tell us what was experienced. We have ultimate meaning, and our God. countless stories of people who have had I read somewhere that old age is a near-death experiences of most extra­ time of gradual diminution; a time of ordinary beauty and wonder, but they accepting restrictions, of relinquishing did not die. While I do not want any some activities; a time of learning to live heroic measures to prolong my life, I do within our limitations. Granted, there is want medication to control unbearable no universal timetable for this-many of pain, if I have it, but not to the point at us are quite obviously still in the latter which I am unaware of what is happen­ part of the second stage of life, being in­ ing. Never having died, I believe it is an volved with all manner of constructive experience I don't want to miss; I want and useful activities. But sooner or later, to experience dying in its entirety, if cir­ we will all have to recognize that we cumstances permit. I don't know what have come to a quieter and I hope more lies ahead, but I am convinced that meaningful period of our lives. Here is nothing of value in all of creation is ever where we can exemplify the validity of lost, and surely a divine-human spirit the wisdom we may be acquiring. Can must be of value. we accept with good grace and valiant Howard Thurman, the great theologi­ hearts less than total freedom from pain an and preacher, has a beautiful medi­ and discomfort? Can we decide against tation on the Old Testament story of Jacob's ladder, at the end of which he says, "At the top of the ladder is the Emily T. Wilson, a member of Kendal Meeting, is Figure, face to face encounter with a medical doctor. This article was taken from a re­ cent talk she gave at the Kendal at Longwood retire­ Whom no man can escape. The search­ Ment home·in Kennett Square, Pa., where she now ing question is, 'How have you lived your resides. life in the light of your truth?' " 0

18 February 15, 1986 FRIENDS JouRNAL were socially adept and pleased to be ing. Or reminiscing. visited. Convinced that boredom must be a They were able to discuss their limita­ factor in the dozing, I composed a long tions with good humor. One woman list of activities and presented them to told me she had prepared carefully for the residents. They showed surprisingly The her retirement and learned several kinds little interest. Only three activities were of highly skilled handwork. ' 'And look requested: I was to make more frequent at me," she said wryly, "half-blind and extended one-on-one visits, to find gen­ Elastic all crippled!" She held out her hands, tle stretching and strengthening exercises ruined by arthritis. Then she laughed that could be done in bed or in a wheel­ heartily. Another resident told me she chair, and to sctedule small-group had grown up a short distance from the discussions. Thread nursing home, which neighbors then At least the small group sounded referred to as the "Old Ladies' Home." promising. I came to the first meeting When she and her friends walked home prepared to facilitate a discussion of pa­ from school in the spring, they'd pick tients' rights or a sharing of complaints. wildflowers and give nosegays to the They wanted to talk about how to live "old ladies" sitting on the porch. " I out their ideals when faced with pain, by Rose Ketterer never thought," she chuckled, "that I frustration, or neglect. A major topic he first time I walked through the would ever be one of the old ladies." was how to respond to a surly aide who nursing home where I was to Not all the residents were so easy to worked the 11 p.m. to 7 a.m. shift. The T serve an internship in social ger­ communicate with. One was deeply de­ residents tended to wake early, between ontology, I was appalled. The place was pressed and usually sat hunched over in 5 a.m. and 6 a.m., but the sullen aide dreary and the residents, most of them her geriatric chair, with a bleak expres­ generally refused to help anyone get out slumped dozing in wheelchairs, were sion on her face. Although her health of bed, go to the bathroom, or dress. very old, severely disabled, and seemed was good and she was able to walk, the She insisted that morning chores were barely conscious. Although two resi­ woman rarely responded to any social the responsibility of the day shift. Oc­ dents were only 77 and in good bodily overture. I was told by her visitors that casionally, when ordered by a nurse to health, both had suffered strokes that this woman had suffered from de­ help a resident wash or dress, the aide left them mentally confused, with severe pression since her 30s. was as slow and unhelpful as she could memory and language disruptions. Most Another resident, who told fantastic be, refusing to turn on water taps (a of the other residents were 90 or older tales about attempts to poison her, painful task for arthritic fingers early in and suffered from multiple disabling wrote so many generous and uncollect­ the morning!) or deliberately choosing conditions. Some were in chronic pain, ible contributions to charitable organi­ clashing color combinations rather than several were incontinent, and few were zations that her checkbook had to be the clothes residents wanted to wear. capable of independent movement. taken away. She once threatened a nurse The woman had never committed a Looking at the residents, I saw human with her heavy cane while demanding a physical act of violence, but her nasti­ wreckage. Had I been laboring under cocktail from the medications cart. Still ness and refusal to answer questions their physical, mental, and social bur­ another resident thought she was in were quite upsetting to several residents. dens I would have been furious, embit­ prison, being punished for a terrible After a long discussion that included tered, or despairing. Walking past the crime that she couldn't remember. One many examples of petty tyranny, one residents as they dozed, I expected them of the few male residents was a gentle resident said, " I try to ask myself, to feel that way. And my first task was wanderer, restless and incapable of sit­ 'What would Jesus have done if he were to visit and interview each one. ting in one place or answering any ques­ in my place?' but it's so hard." At first I roamed the hall, searching tion with more than a monosyllable. Hearing the details of their daily lives, for people who looked alert. There Most of the residents, however, de­ learning that very few residents had the weren't many. In time I learned that if spite many and serious health problems strength or agility, for instance, to put I carne quietly into a room and sat down and a marked propensity for dozing, on a sweater was what was hard for me. next to someone who was dozing, she were well connected to reality through They were interesting, caring people would almost always open her eyes and television news and talk shows. with a full range of the emotional and be ready to interact. Each interview was Why did they doze so much? I won­ social concerns of any adult population, to take about 15 minutes and cover a dered if medication could be responsi­ but they had outlived their bodies' use­ few specific areas. Instead, I found ble, but soon learned that drugged peo­ fulness. Sometimes visitors would come myself spending two hours or more with ple don't move so easily in and out of out to the nurses' station, weeping, and each resident, mostly listening. Far from consciousness as these old people did. ask, "Why don't they die? Why can't being the "vegetables" or miserable Sometimes folks were weary, but then they die?" The oldest resident answered wretches I had anticipated, the residents they usually asked to be helped into bed that question for me one day. She was and slept more heavily. 103 years old, rather fearful and quiet, A member of Haddonfield (N.J.) Meeting, Rose Ketterer is active on many Quaker committees. She Were they bored? When I asked resi­ and deaf in one ear, but, unlike many is working on a Ph.D. dissertation at Temple dents that question I was told, no, they younger residents, she could walk with University in the field of human development. were just resting. Or thinking. Or pray- the aid of a cane. Tapping her fingers

FRIENDS JoURNAL February 15, 1986 19 nervously, this woman said to me, great age. What were they doing when stage of life. Extreme pain, physical or "When all the good ones, and so many they sat in that lightest of sleep? No one emotional, interferes with the mystical younger ones, were taken, and I was gave me a very clear answer, so I set out process, at least for some people. Drugs left, I used to pray and ask for my time on an extensive literature search on lei­ may interfere, but it's hard to know to come. I thought I was being made to sure pursuits among the aged. Sure what a drugged person is experiencing. stay here because I wasn't good enough enough, it was there. Researchers had Mental disruption need not detract from for the Lord to take. But now I feel found repeatedly that the very aged the mystical tendency. there's some work I still have to do. I spend most of their discretionary time Earlier I mentioned a resident who don't know what it is, but God must "sitting quietly," "relaxing," or "just thought she had been imprisoned. She have something left for me to do. And thinking.'' Those were some of the very could not remember her crime, and so after I've done it, then I can go home." terms residents used to describe what I would open every conversation with By this time I was beginning, like the called dozing. "I'm losing my mind!" One day, this oldest resident and the weeping visitors, The more I observed, the more I be­ woman called me into her room. "I'm to puzzle over the reason for the exis­ gan to feel their dozing was like medita­ losing my mind," she began. I started tence of the last stage of life. Before tion. I had learned one form of medita­ to reassure her that she had lost portions having any contact with old people, I tion as a Catholic schoolchild, and two of her memory, but that her mind was assumed that old age had one of two ori­ other forms as an adult, through hyp­ fine. The resident interrupted me. "I'm gins: either old age was a biological notism and yoga. The old people I was losing my mind," she said, "but it's all adaptation, a way of serving the species working with were not Quakers. I didn't right. If I have no mind, I can't be dis­ in preliterate times by extending the know any Quakers at the time, or my tracted by the things of this world. I'm memory of the group, or old age was a search might have been briefer. As I free to concentrate on God. It's a great fluke, an accident connected with mod­ reflect on the dozing now, I see that it blessing I've been given." For once she ern medicine. In neither case did I ex­ felt like silent worship. The reason I kept was at peace. Of course, she lost her pect debilitated old age to be helpful to feeling a spiritual presence was that beautiful insight-it was too recent in the aged individual. Spirit was present. her memory to be retained. But at least As I grew to know this particular This then was the gift, the stunning, for the few moments while she explained group of very old people, and to cau­ unexpected treasure I found in the nurs­ her case to me, the woman was happy. tiously question others who worked in ing home. The very old seem to fall easi­ And she spoke out of eternity to me. gerontology, an uneasy sense of Pres­ ly into what I can only call communion. If being free of "mind" lets one into in­ ence played, as it were, around the corners This does not seem to happen only for finity, what does freedom from the bur­ of my vision, just out of sight. After saintly folks, or for those who have den of waking consciousness do? In the nearly 20 years of convinced agnosti­ studied and practiced meditation. I desert of frail old age, is dozing a sweet cism, I was surprised to find myself believe that a natural predisposition to oasis? thinking I was seeing a Creator's foot­ meditation and contemplation, a natural I no longer think of old age as an print in the lives of the old people. mysticism, is built right into old age. adaptive mechanism or a medical fluke. Something about the very old seemed, The urge to inner quiet feels to me like For me, the last stage of life appears as unreasonably, to be blessed. And it was a developmental compulsion, a given an elastic thread, an unbreakable bond connected in some way with their doz­ ability as strong as the urge to speech is between each of us and the Source of ing. I began to wonder whether dozing in a young child. Worship is, I believe, life, a bond that guides us irresistibly might be a defining characteristic of both the gift and the purpose of the last home. 0

can be the blue of summer skies, the clasps and close embraces. A Meditation white of floating clouds, the green of Such a tapestry is woven, its colors fields, the yellow of dandelions and chosen, its design complete. 0 on the Tapestry buttercups. There can be the purple of of Life distant hills, the shadows of ravines, the blackness of rock, and the dimness by Grace Y au key of the deep dark woods. There can be caves, unexpected and e cannot choose the loom on unknown, that must be entered, con­ which the tapestry of life is quered, divested of their fears. Out Wwoven, nor can we even beyond them lies the glory of the au­ sketch a design. Still, we can gather the tumn woods ablaze with browns and yarns which the shuttle will carry be­ golds and silvers. tween the threads of the warp. There Best of all come the lights of candles, the red holly berries, the Grace Yaukey, a poet and author, lives at Friends House in Sandy Spring, Md. Her medita­ fragrance of evergreens, the sound of tion appeared in the November 1985 newsfeller music, the aroma of Christmas cook­ oj Bethesda Meeting, of which she is a member. ing, the joy of voices and warm hand-

20 '.

Where children live today tells a lot about where they will be tomorrow. Seg­ ...... ········ ·····~ ...... ·-- .. ---·-··· regated housing hurts all children-it can mean inferior schools and restricted opportunities for minority children. All too often, it means little hope for a better future. The Four Doors Learn how you can earn competitive in­ terest rates on your investment dol­ lars-and help to fight the injustice of just go to sleep-and that is all. Our racial segregation in housing. Send by Bliss Forbush genes, our family 'stock' continues, and this coupon today for facts on Fund for an OPEN Society investment opportuni­ perhaps what we say or write may have ties to: tely I have been moved to a smaller some influence for a generation or two, room in this hospital unit of a but this is all." Quaker lifetime care center. A third possibility is suggested by Jomes Former & Morru Milgrom I L Fund for an OPEN Society ·From my second-story window I have Arnold Bennett, who told of an elderly 311 S. Juniper Street - Suite 400 I an interesting view of the main parking statesman of India who had served his Philadelph~ . PA 19107 I I lot, where something is always going on, nation well. He sat on a promontory NAME I from the movement of the daily mail overlooking a large city. Here he had an AllOR£SS I truck to a large moving van bringing in " illumination." He could see into a CITY STATE ZIP I the property of a nev · resident. To my typical slum, where a woman was soon Thl$ is not ;an otrtr to sell sccuriUts. Tht otftri,.. is rNdt I J only by the o&rine circulu. This offtrinlll is not mNt in ;any left I see a thick woods that marks the to have a baby. In his prophetic revela­ I .ut• whc" prohibited ~>~' 1aw. 1 boundary of our property and an exten­ tion he realized that he was to be that sion of the building that cuts off the baby. L------~~~1 south, and to the east a long one-story The fourth possibility was expressed structure which houses the apartments. by an Episcopal minister who taught a Residents on my hall are convalescing class in our center. He was a scholar, a ,i: ~;.,\; :il ': from some illness or, like me, are ter­ philosopher, a mystic, and a..,_ panen­ !· . ' 4 1'!1 '--. .,... minal cases. Things go slowly here. Only theist, that is, one who believes that the 1 with intimate friends or relatives do we Divine is present wherever there is life, · ~v (· ..., t t o \, talk about what lies ahead, which is in nature or in man, but that this is not death. Many of us have signed a living the whole of God's being. When death / Sell<)( ~1 will, and all of us have stored our legal comes, that of God returns to the .. papers in a safe-deposit box. unlimited Divinity or God. . - Facing the future I can conceive of at One night I had a dream. There was least four possibilities. a heavy rain, and as I looked out of the WESTTOWN The first was shown to me by a dear window, fog was still rising from the friend whom I had known for 60 years. parking lot. Looking to the east all had SCHOOL He spoke feelingly of his wife, who had changed. The long row of clusters had Westtown, PA 19395 died six months before. As I left his disappeared and in their place were four (215) 399-0123 room he said, "I will be with Elizabeth sets of noble pillars, and between them PK-10th Grade Day in a few days." He died two days later. were four large doors. I stepped out of 9-12th Grade Boarding By contrast, a "weighty Friend" who my window and approached the doors. "I think Westtown is special because the had served her meeting well in many Halfway to them I could see distinguish­ people are willing to share, willing to capacities over the years, declared, "We ing markers on each. On one was a care, and willing to dare to be different. You can be your own person!" Now 90, Bliss Forbush, a member of Baltimore Christian cross; the second showed a Betsy Brown '86 (Md.) Meeting, has been executive secretary of family genealogy; on the third was a Baltimore Yearly Meeting, headmaster of the figure of Buddha, and the fourth was For Further Information Friends School in Baltimore, and chairman of the plain. PleaN Contoot: Friends General Conference central committee. Bradley J. Quln, His books include Elias Hicks, Quaker Liberal, I walked forward toward the four Director of Admlalons and Moses Sheppard, Baltimore Philanthropist. doors. 0

FRIENDS JoURNAL February 15, 1986 21 by Mary B. Howarth ne of the leading Finnish Quakers, Elvi Lahja Saari, died in Hameen­ O linna, Finland, August 15, 1985, after a long struggle with cancer which never dimmed her cheerful spirit. Elvi was born December 23, 1910, in Kirvussa, Kerava, which is now in the USSR. As a child her eagerness and strength so resembled a tousled brother in the Finnish classic Seven Brothers, that she was called "Esko" even though she was a girl. Esko left eastern Finland for Helsinki in who elaborates further: "The idea took like 1935 . While a candidate for a doctor of divin­ a lighted fire and before we got up from our ity degree she worked in girls' clubs and with morning's closing session, we had dreamed the Finnish Girl Scouts. Unable to return to up the way it should work under the Chris­ her home in eastern Finland after the Winter tian Settlement Movement's authority and War, she served as a director in the Women's [with] a close relationship with both KVT Defense Work Alliance. Following the war, and the Quakers." through her association with the Finnish Money was raised to purchase property on Christian Settlement Movement, Esko went a lake near Hameenlinna, southern Finland. north to Lapland to act as an interpreter for In 1951 Elvi Saari was chosen director of the the American Friends Service Committee re­ new school "Viittakivi." To the present lief team in the winter of 1945. In this posi­ time, classes are given in both English and tion with the Quakers, she gradually shifted Finnish. The Finnish government pays 85 from full-time relief work, distributing food percent of the teachers' salaries, gives allow­ and clothing, to more involvement with the ances for depreciation on buildings, and even budding work camp movement. gives student scholarships. In 1946 Esko spent a year at Pendle Hill . For 25 years, Esko served as director. Dur­ This association, as well as time at Wood­ ing that time many Friends and others who brooke, moved her rapidly from her former­ had worked in Finland in relief and work ly nationalistic stance to an international, camps returned to teach and lecture at Viit­ nonviolent outlook. After directing two sum­ takivi. Esko successfully continued to draw mer work camps sponsored by the AFSC, students from around the world, including Esko became the first Finnish director of the Eastern European countries. During the early newly formed Kansanviilinen Vapaaehtoinen years an Indian student from Shantiniketan, Tyoleirijarjesto (KVT; the International Tagore's schoo!'in Bengal, India, introduced Voluntary Workcamp Organization). Her Esko to the practice of yoga. She, in her beneficial influence has helped KVT continue usually thorough way, became an expert yogi to the present. and taught yoga for years. In 1949 she returned to Rovanieni, Lap­ Until the conclusion of World War II, land, to direct the Rovala (Settlement) adult Helsinki Meeting, under the care of British school. At a planning conference of leaders Friends, consisted primarily of elderly, of the Finnish Settlement Movement, KVT, Swedish-speaking Finns. Esko was one of the and Quakers (including Horace Alexander, first Finnish-speaking Finns to join the Swedish Friend Emelia Fogelklou Norlind, meeting. Subsequently she lectured and Douglas Steere, and Thomas Harvey), Esko traveled extensively in Europe, Africa, and made the suggestion that perhaps this group the United States. In 1972, she was awarded FRIENDS SELECf SCHOOL could assist in establishing a "Finnish Pendle the Suomen Kulttuurirahaston (Finnish Cul­ Hill," using as a pattern the indigenous Scan­ tural Prize). 17th and the Parkway, Philadelphia dinavian folk high school. The group felt Of her writings, Friends should note par­ Kindergarten through 12th grade in that this "would be a gift which would ticularly "Kveekarien jaljilla Suomessa" a supportive, caring environment. memorialize the almost New Testament-like ("Quaker Footsteps in Finland") and Paavo Small classes, strong academics, fellowship that the three groups had had in Ruotsalainen- George Fox ofFinland. This and Quaker values; a dynamic set­ those three years of relief work which they fall her autobiography Ei Minulta Mitliiin ting for children in the heart of did together," according to Douglas Steere, Puutu (I Shall Not Want) was published by Philadelphia. WSOY, Finland. Friends are seeking to have Mary Howarth was one ofthe founders ofthe Fin­ it translated into English. Richard L. Mandel, Headmaster nish work camp movement. She was in Finland Margaret Harkins, as a relief worker from 1945 to 1948. A member Esko's pioneering spirit in the field of East­ Director of Admissions of Media (Pa.) Meeting and a sojourner at Univer­ West relations and her deeply spiritual coun­ (215) 561-5900 sity (Wash.) Meeting, she is on the JOURNAL's sel, both to individuals and groups, will be board of managers. sorely missed by both Friends and friends. 0

22 February 15, 1986 FRIENDS JoURNAL fore we flew on to Japan. In Tokyo, we were taken to the office of Whet experts have said about . . .. the Japan National Council of Churches, where we were given a friendly welcome, and IRe~orts Aiko Carter told us of the conference she is planning, centered around the plight of the Vietnamese women whose husbands from Messengers of Hope: The North or South Vietnam were exposed to Pacific Peace Delegation Agent Orange during the Vietnam War. The wives are held responsible for the malformed Margaret Clark, from Australia, and babies born to them, are being divorced, and Marian Lyftogt and Muriel Morrison, from feel ashamed. After meeting for worship on New Zealand, were chosen by their yearly Sunday we saw slides of present-day Viet­ meetings to visit Hawaii, the U.S. West nam, showing the devastation of forest and Coast, Japan, Korea, and Singapore as the agricultural land. Circle Pacific Peace Delegation: A Quaker In Hiroshima over dinner we met a wom­ Initiative, October 6-November 14, 1985. en's group of great courage and gaiety mak­ Our purpose was to meet with Friends and ing a strong witness against the male domina­ peace groups to tell about our peacemaking tion so general in Japan. We were taken to and to hear about their hopes and endeav­ see the Peace Park, crowded with busloads ors. We hoped to strengthen the ties of affil­ of school children of all ages, and Japanese iation and friendship wherever we met with and other tourists. We listened to the story those active in working for peace around the of the woman Hibakusha (victim of atomic Dealing Creatively Pacific. bombing) who now works daily at the Inter­ In Hawaii, where we were so kindly cared national Center, teaching visiting children the with Death for by Rusty and John Schweitzer at the necessity of peacemaking from her own life. AManual of Friends Center, Margaret and Marian at­ In Yokohama, we were given very loving Death Education & tended classes with students at the university, hospitality for three days by Susumu and his while I spent a day with Jim Albertini on his wife, Michiko. Susumu took us to Yokocus­ Simple Burial community farm on Big Island (Hilo). Jim ka, where we met with a very well informed, ~ Ernest Morgan is out on bail after jumping in the harbor in active peace citizen's group. One of their members took us up the hill to the point front of a U.S. nuclear warship, in protest, • 'I have used It for years and love It!'' as it entered the port of Hilo, which had pre­ which he visits every day with his binoculars - Elisabeth Kubler-Ross viously been declared nuclear-weapon free. to observe and record the movements of the "A gem of a book ... "- Nursing '85 nuclear-armed warships for which Yokocus­ In San Francisco we were welcomed by "The best book of any length in its Carl Anderson. After meetings with Friends ka is a home port. field." - Medical Self-Care and a visit to the Livermore Laboratory, Marian and Margaret went to Korea for Marian and Margaret traveled north, Mar­ two days where they were guided by Yoon An outgrowth of the Burial Com­ garet to Victoria in Canada and to Seattle, Gu Lee to further valuable contacts. I stayed mittee of Yellow Springs Friends Meeting, this small encyclopedia on where she joined the Ground Zero Group in in Tokyo and attended Japan Yearly Meet­ ing, where the clerk of Hong Kong Meeting death-related concerns deals with their weekly, early-morning leafleting of the death in a holistic way. ALL NEW workers at the Trident base where the White and I were the overseas visitors. The EDITION-concise, comprehensive, Train unloads its cargo of death. Together Japanese Friends committed to peacemak­ simply written, technically sound. An we visited the American Friends Service ing as an expression of their Quaker faith are expanded, up-to-date version of an Committee office in Seattle, and Marian a small group working in a difficult situa­ established classic. visited Portland and George Fox College. In tion and need our support, encouragement, the San Francisco Bay Area we sailed in the and loving concern. ORDER NOW peace navy of about 27 boats, counter­ In Singapore we had a good meeting with AND RECEIVE BONUS DISCOUNT! ing the U.S. Navy's "Fleet Week" display some of the staff of the Christian Conference _ Dealing Creatively with Death of warships entering the harbor. We also ad­ of Asia. $6.50ea.; $3.90ea. for10+ copies dressed meetings in San Jose (FOR), in It was a good, a joyous, and a sad time _Harvest of the Years-our classic · Modesto, Santa Rosa, Sacramento (Lawyers for me, to be a messenger of hope from New pamphlet on aging at a 20% disc. Zealand to the United States and Japan and $1 .75 ea.-offer good till4/15/86, Alliance for Arms Control), in Visalia, and must be purchased with above title Fresno. We met with peace activists, talked at the same time to experience the darkness. to high school classes, and gave radio and Our presence among peace groups was more Please send my book(a) to: TV interviews. We also attended Grass Val­ meaningful than I had anticipated. I experi­ Name:______ley Quarterly Meeting at John Woolman enced a growing sense of the interconnected­ ness of all things. School, where we enjoyed meeting and shar­ Address _____~------ing with Friends. To all the people I have met on this jour­ In the Los Angeles area we spoke to ney and to all I will meet working in different Friends, to an Alliance for Survival meeting, ways and committed to different paths, I City to a freeze group, and to the Friends Com­ want to send "positive, hallowing love mittee on National Legislation. I took part energy." I want also to contact more close­ State, Zip ______in the weekly demonstration outside the Nor­ ly that Life-giving Source within me to find All books shipped postpaid. Return ton Air Base which the Riverside Peace Cen­ ever freshly my own path for the healing of your prepaid order to: Celo Press, the world. Dept. FJ, 1901 Hannah Branch Road , ter holds every Friday afternoon. We all met Burnsville NC 28714. (704-675-4925) with the AFSC committee in Pasadena be- Muriel Morrison

FRIENDS JouRNAL February 15, 1986 23 IWorld of Friends

• ~3.<;e ce1KtF1cat:es "Choose Life!" is the theme of the 1986 Small international aid projects are Miami • az.oatZ0s •1f25C~pclot2S • World Day of Prayer on March 7. Begun in (Fla.) Meeting's way of making a difference • e1~ct2 announcemencs • the United States in 1887 by laywomen of the in the Third World. The meeting adopts Presbyterian church, the World Day of projects too small for the American Friends • <;~eec1~ ca£0 bes1<.;ns • Prayer has now spread worldwide and is a Service Committee or the Friends World •1nvtcac1ons • sc~u.s · catalyst for Christian women to come to­ Committee for Consultation or other organ­ gether in continuing relationships of prayer izations by channeling donations to these :H""l':f!Ttiiresr and action for peace. Each year women from projects. Friends and others can send tax: 609-786-tSZ+ a different area in the world write the serv­ deductible monies to the meeting, which ice. This year Australian women wrote are then forwarded to the projects indicated "Choose Life!" to articulate the prayerful by the donors. Present projects include help­ choices to be made if peace is to be achieved. ing Haitians find jobs, housing, and medical It calls women of faith to take actions that care in the Miami area; helping Guatemalan will begin to change the injustice and inequi­ students with advanced education through CREMATION ties that cause suffering in the world. Church Tom and Trudi Hunt of the Guatemala Ci­ Friends are reminded that the Women United, the sponsor of the World ty Meeting; and assisting the AFSC director Anna T. Jeanes Fund Day of Prayer, is an ecumenical movement in Mexico City to buy a house to help young will reimburse cremation costs. that brings Protestant, Roman Catholic, and men from the villages with temporary hous­ (Applicable to members of Orthodox women together in one Christian ing, job skills training, and job placement. Philadelphia Yearly Meeting only.) For Information write or telephone community of prayer, advocacy, and service. Miami Meeting also supports the Peace RICHARD F. BElTS Center in San Jose, Costa Rica, and the 500-B Glen Echo Rood Women's Cooperative in Bangladesh. Philodelpblo, PA 19119 Youth Quest '86, a youth delegation to the (215) 247-3354 Soviet Union, June 24-July 24, is being Friends wishing to help any of these projects sponsored by the Fellowship of Reconcilia­ can send checks (indicate the project) to tion. The trip will give 20 U.S. young peo­ Miami Friends Meeting, 1185 Sunset Drive, ple (ages 16-20) an opportunity to meet with Coral Gables, FL 33143. Contributions to Soviets and explore together the meaning of the Peace Center and the Women's Cooper­ Watch nonviolence and reconciliation and to learn ative may also be sent through the FWCC. the birdie. to appreciate our cultural differences. The trip costs approximately $2,000. Full or par­ The Cathedral Church of St. John the Divine Make . tial scholarships are available to ensure a in New York City declared its grounds and diverse (ethnic, class, geographic) group. For buildings a nuclear-free zone at its 1985 New sweet mustc. applications or more information, write Year's Eve Peace Concert. By joining the Youth Quest '86, Box 271, Nyack, NY almost 3,000 communities in 17 nations that Take a hike ..... 10960, or call (914) 358-4601. have declared as nuclear-free zones, the dean of the cathedral stated that the church ''has The Associated Committee of Friends on resolved to disengage, however best it can, At Mohonk there are 24 special Indian Affairs (ACFIA) will hold its !17th from the Nuclear State and the Nuclear State theme programs. just about one annual session in Des Moines, Iowa, April of Mind." Every day at noon, the bells in every other week. Ranging from 11-12. Friends and others interested in native the cathedral tower ring for peace and the antiquing to birdwatchjng. con­ Americans are encouraged to attend the ses­ International Peace Prayer is read. certs to hiking. whodunits to sions to find out what is being done in the how-to-do-its. All in an inspiring. areas served by the ACFIA. For more infor­ A Quaker writers' network is in the works one-of-a-kind natural setting mation, write Sterrett L. Nash, Secretary of around a glacial lake in the for Canadian Friends. Those who are in­ Education and Publicity, 612 Plum St., Box terested in developing a "morale-boosting Shawangunk Mountains. only 90 161 , Frankton, IN 46044, after March 10. miles from New York. With thou­ support group" and in sharing their literary sands of acres to hike. ride and Meet Finnish Friends at the Viittakivi Inter­ endeavors may send their names, addresses, dream in. Delicious meals. Con­ national Center, the "Pendle Hill" of and areas of interest to Bob Foster, 373 genial companions. Come for our Finland. Isolated and off the beaten track, Wardlaw Ave., Winnepeg, Manitoba R3L programs. Come to be yourself. Friends in Finland are always interested in OL8, Canada, or to Alison Pirot, 2629 meeting Friends from abroad. Viittakivi has Garnet St., Regina, Saskatchewan S4T 3A8, both winter and summer programs. The Canada. winter course, which aims at increasing understanding of world problems, also in­ "Many Roads, One Journey" is the theme cludes two weeks in Lapland to study arctic for the 1986 Friends General Conference life. Viittakivi sits in a rural setting, which Gathering of Friends to be held June 28-July provides opportunities for skiing, walking, 5 at Carleton College, Northfield, Minn. The and other open air activities. For details on Advance Program will be sent to Friends in attending programs, write Viittakivi Interna­ mid-March, but in the meanwhile, mark the tional Center, SF-14700 Hauho, Finland. date on your calendar.

24 February 15, 1986 FRIENDS JouRNAL The 1986 Martin Luther King, Jr., Award goes to Myles Horton, who has spent almost all his 80 years helping people to help them­ KENDAL MANAGEMENT SERVICES selves through reflection and action. On a non-profit subsidiary of Kendal-Crosslands offers adminis­ Christmas night in 1931, Horton couldn't tration and management to other non-profit groups which sleep because he was envisioning a school in provide care and services to older people. which poor Southerners, blacks, mountain people, and factory workers would be wel­ For more information, please contact comed as students. Out of this dream the Lloyd W. Lewis Richard R. Dewees Highlander Research and Education Center Executive Director Associate Director was founded in Tennessee. At that time it KENDAL-CROSSLANDS was the only place in the South where blacks BOX 100, KENNETI' SQUARE, PA 19348 and whites could meet as equals. Shortly after attending a Highlander workshop, (215) 388-7001 Rosa Parks launched the civil rights move­ ment by refusing to sit in the back of a bus. Martin Luther King, Jr., found strength and renewal from his many visits to Highlander. Threatened many times, Highlander Center and Myles Horton survived a devastating fire, a conviction for illegally practicing inte­ gration, and being labeled as "Communist." .A JI'Un~ cfi/etime Care Cenfer Sponsored by the Fellowship of Reconcilia­ tion, the award is presented annually to a o/fe,.iiUJ a rewa,.Jing person who is a "drum major for peace and justice." wa'J o/ f;/e /or older men and women

This "Prayer for the Aging" was sent by 13801 York Road Olwen Palmer to New Zealand Wider Cockeysville, Maryland 21030 Quaker Fellowship members. The original (301) 628-6900 author is unknown. "Lord, I thank you that I am aging. For many folk jt is an impossible privilege. To know this blessing gives every day a fresh reason to wonder. I thank you for the joys which I can now suddenly ALTERNATIVE ENERGY CAN BE appreciate: for the freeing of my fingers from worthless business, for a more simple life, MORE THAN RESPONSIBLE ••• for songbirds meeting in flight over a sunlit field, for moments of tranquility in which IT CAN BE PROFITABLE! to nurture a faith in your past blessings, for holy ti.mes when everything falls into its Our Investors have profited from Altematlve rightful place, and heavenly pleasure absorbs Energy because we have Invested In: all the world's sad bustle. D Cogeneration D Geothermal D Insulation D Auidized Bed Burning "Father in heaven,give me a consciousness of the beauty of the autumn of life, a time D Clean Utilities D Garbage to Energy D Solar Glass to fulfill, a time to harvest. Let old age be & Heating D Conservation D Solar Cells (Photovoltaics) seen as part of your plan for the world and The NEW ALTERNATIVES FUND is a Mutual Fund that gives you the for us, so that the years may weigh, not as choice to concentrate your investment in solar and alternative energy, a burden, but as a blessing upon us. Free us and growth companies that capitalize on energy cost consciousness. from self-pity which shrivels up the soul. Write for a FREE prospectus that tells you why there is substantial Although our wrinkles increase and our investment potential in the stocks of companies meeting this need. bodies tire, do not wither our spirit. May See how it can work for you. every new hour be worthy of enquiry."

The Quaker Universalist Fellowship will hold NEW ALTERNATIVES FUND A Mutu~l Fund concentrating in its annual meeting on March 8 at German­ Alternate Energy, Solar Energy and Conservation Investments town Meeting in Philadelphia, Pa. Open to Quaker Universalists and other interested persons, the day's program includes a talk • See our track •••••••••••••••••••••I NEW ALTERNATIVES FUND, Inc. FJ-F 1 by Howard Bartram on "Quaker Universal­ record 1 295 Northern Blvd., Great Neck, NY 11021 I ism-Centripetal, Centrifugal," and by • Examine our list I Please send me a Prospectus and Fund package. Michael Sells on "Universalism, Silence, and of investments I Mystical Traditions." For more information, • ~~~s~vestment: 1 NAME 1 call Bob Rubinstein, (215) 527-6387 (eves.) • Call collect: ADDRESS I or Alfred Roberts, (215) 923-3969. For 516-466-0808 1 I overnight hospitality call Carolyn Terrell, or send coupon 1 CITY STATE ZIP • (215) 842-3342 (home) or 241-7279 (work).

FRIENDS JoURNAL February 15, 1986 L..-----·····················-=25 leads him to simplify what is complex. He "translates" the Gospels by dropping OLNEY out what he doesn't like; he replaces reason with passion. He deceives himself FRIENDS IForum and his followers. Just when I was recognizing I needed SCHOOL to be_ free from Tolstoy's false simplicity, Aging Creatively I rediscovered his true simplicity through Call or write: • Quaker "Where Love Is, God Is." The rest of Barnesville, • Boarding Many people ask me how I keep the essay should be clear from these Ohio 43713 • Grades 9-12 myself so creatively active at age 94. comments. 614-425-3655 • College Prep. My answer is: will power. I work at it Paul A. Lacey every morning. Richmond, Ind. EDUCATING THE 1. Reflexology-massage bottom of WHOLE PERSON feet and use electric stimulators on every Otney wttcome1 atudenrs from all raciaJ and religious backgrounds. part of body. Slanting board 15 minutes Wolf in Sheep's Clothing twice a day. Blood to the head then rest. 2. Exercise on floor in the a.m.-do The splendid article "Sister Horse and yoga-acupressure to cure arthritis and Brother Ox" (FJ 12/ 15/85), which details bursitis. our cruelties to God's other children, the 3. Chiropractic-in nearby town­ animals, is flawed by two small but works on spine. crucial pieces of misinformation. 4. Food intake-difficult to be Hi Doty points out "countless obscene On West Grand Lake complete vegetarian. I follow a dietary ways we are killing God's creatures" then In Eastern Maine program based on having one's active life goes on to say he hopes Friends are last to 120 years or more. I use natural supporting "World Wildlife Fund, We are looking for young men and herbs, much yogurt, lots of fresh fruit, Greenpeace, and National Wildlife women 11-17 for our 30th year to and cottage cheese. Federation." I hope we're all supporting 5. Spiritual meditation-one half-hour Greenpeace, but the National Wildlife JOIN US FOR or longer. I face the rising sun, holding Federation is affiliated with the National CHALLENGING CANOE EXPEDITIONS my Quaker philosophy: "There is that of Rifle Association and, like World IN THE WILDERNESS God in everyone." I prefer the word Wildlife Fund, has as its goal the supply OF MAINE AND CANADA Divinity. Humanity is evolving. I'm a of quarry to hunters, that they may part of it. Everything in the universe is continue to indulge in blood sports for Four, six, and eight weeks connected. At a certain point I hold amusement. particular individuals. To stop the truly obscene killing of George and Claire Darrow Now I am ready for breakfast and one God's creatures, Friends should be Route 68, Box 16F cup of coffee. supporting People for Ethical Treatment Cushing, Maine 04563 I live alone in a four-room house built of Animals (P.O. Box 42516, (207) 354-8128 for me across the yard from my nephew Washington, DC 20015), Mobilization for and his wife and two teen-age children. I Animals (P.O. Box 1679, Columbus, OH do as many things for myself as possible, 43216), and Fund for Animals (200 W. most of my cooking, etc. When elderly 57th St., N.Y. , NY 10019). people begin to let others do things for Hi Doty's article is deeply moving, and Oal(,wood them, their bodies accept it and they the errors are understandable because become less and less active. the two organizations to which I take By_ noon I'm working at my desk, exception masquerade as humane groups. keepmg up with creative activities connected with my work. If I've had to Beatrice Williams be out late I plan to spend most of the New York, N.Y. next day in bed. The books from which I get the most guidance are: Joy's Way by W. Brugh Would Woolman Wear Fur? Oakwood helps to prepare young Joy, M.D., Alternate Realities by adults for college and beyond by Lawrence LeShan, and The Turning Your December 1, 1985, issue presents teaching them to live and work with Point by Fritjof Capra. a paradox. It contains the article, "John their hands, heart.s, and minds. Come, Woolman and Animals," in which writer take the risk of success. You 'II discover Rachel Davis DuBois Joan Gilbert exhorts us to examine our that Oakwood is the place to achieve Woodstown, N.J. !nsensitivity ~oward animal suffering, and and excel. 1t also contams an ad in the classified section for one fox jacket (value $1 ,500), Call now to anange a visit: Quaker Author Responds proceeds to benefit the Community Thomas J. Huff, Friends School Scholarship Fund. Admissions Director 1 am sorry if my essay for "Quaker Now, fox pelts neither grow on trees (914) 4624200 Authors Respond" (FJ 11 / 15/ 85) nor are willingly relinquished by foxes 515 South Road exceeded the available space, but friends wishing to escape the summer heat. And, Poughkeepsie. NY 12601 here tell me that the missing second only one species of fox-the silver paragraph leaves them baffled. May I gray-will reproduce in captivity. It alone A Friends Co-EducaUonal ' impose on your good nature and briefly is commercially "ranched," a euphemism Boarding and Day School explain what I said there? for the factory farming of wild animals. Tolstoy the artist led me to Tolstoy the ~ost foxes are taken in the wild by steel­ Grades 9-12 moralist, at just the time I was most Jaw traps, set throughout our woodlands TulUon reduction for Quaker {amUles vulnerable, but the moralist is very during winter. dangerous. His intensity of conviction These traps are designed to clamp onto

26 February 15, 1986 FRIENDS JOURNAL and crush the animal's leg. They destroy chess at times. I suppose even bingo is tissue and bone. They cause the animal better than no hobbies at all, but every­ to thrash frantically in pain and terror, one should have useful hobbies, and to bite and gnash at the metal, thus younger people will find them of destroying teeth as well. This agony increasing benefit as they grow older. continues until the trapper returns, perhaps days later. Death comes by Clifford North Merry clubbing or strangulation (so as not to Los Angeles, Calif. damage the pelt's value). What kind of person would condone or reap profit from this disgusting, violent, Corning to Terms and cowardly activity? R. C. Varden I think a special aspect of the later Mercersburg, Pa. years is that we may find ourselves doing well to confront important issues that we were able to gloss over earlier. The The following letters were received in process of coming to terms with oneself response to Edward N. Wright's Forum can be difficult at any age, yet energies letter "On Aging: What Are the can be redeemed by committing to a Answers?" (FJ 2115185). Although the deepened understanding of one's own letters were received too late to publish character as principal architect of one's with the others, it seems appropriate to destiny and internal condition. To be more specific, I find it useful to print them now. -Ed. recognize the extent to which we may prop up our lives by leaning on other people, rushing to their aid, and Old Age: Hobbies Help manipulating them like objects in our need to be needed and gain acceptance FRIENDS' CENTRAL SCHOOL Edward N. Wright's Forum letter and control. Overbrook, Philadelphia, 19151 (FJ 2/ 15/ 85) was interesting. I am The same compulsion and impulsion • A co-educational country day school nearly 75 years of age, so 1 am operate in all manner of relationships. on a 23-acre campus just outside of increasingly interested in the subject. Any The problem is that often beingness is Philadelphia. hobbies, preferably those helpful to missing. Without it, there's nothing much • Pre-primary (four-year-olds) through others, are essential to useful longevity. left inside when we cease manipulating 12th grade. Those who have developed no hobbies our objects. When circumstances, due to • A Friends school established in 1845, usually don't last long after retirement. change, no longer afford the patterns of Friends' Central emphasizes the pursuit In October 1977 I found I could print relating in which we've invested so much of excellence in education through booklets on my mimeograph, and energy, it's little wonder that we feel our concern for the individual student. although I still don't get professional foundations have turned to sand. results, by doing it all myself the cost is ThomasA. Wood In our pain and barrenness at any Headmaster lowered to what I can afford, and I can calendar age, we may be prone to ask present interesting ideas to more people. what, if any, are the answers? It seems to Seniors have had more experience and me that asking for answers is apt to be a can make their latter years the most request to be told what to do by some beneficial in their whole lives. Some other human voice. In so requesting, we projects require a long development refuel the fires of avoiding the decisions period before coming into general and choices only we can make for acceptance. ourselves, individually. As someone said, A constantly increasing proportion of the crown of life is the exercise of choice. our population is reaching senior age, therefore the need for satisfactory occupations for them is increasing. Also Wilfred Reynolds individuality is apt to increase and should Evanston, Ill. be matched by an increase in available occupations. I can still swim at the YMCA, A Full, Active Life Sandy Spring although at a slower rate. It is a healthy exercise. Recently I swam three miles at Edward N. Wright asks what the Friends School one time. I have swum over 75 miles answers are to aging, and I felt I would each of the past two years, and since like to offer some comments on this REGISTER NOW January I, 1967, my total distance is inquiry. Let your lives speak further than the highway distance from I shall be 83 years old next birthday • Enriched liberal arts curriculum L.A. to Providence, R.I. I also play and have lived a full and active life-my health is good in mind and body. I'm a • Coed Day grades 7-12 little slower in my movements, a little • Boarding Community grades 9-12 arthritic in my knees, which makes • School bus transportation jogging not feasible, but my bodily and • Quaker values mental functions are as good as when 135-acre campus, 35 miles from I was 60-so my doctor tells me­ Washington, D.C. or Baltimore consequently in my years of retirement I have found that I really did enter into new reaches. (301) 774-7455 or 744-4531 Clive Packer-Doust 16923 Norwood Road, Kerikeri, Bay of Islands Sandy Spring, Maryland New Zealand

27 ------Subscription • Qlft • !Resources Address Ch•nge Form Please enter a subscription to FRIENDS JOURNAL, Selected Resources on Aging payment for which is enclosed. 0 One year $15 0 Two years $29 Books 0 Three years $43 (Extra postage outside the U.S., $6 a year) • After Ninety. By Imogen Cunningham. Univer­ 0 Enroll me as a FRIENDS JOURNAL sity of Washington Press, Seattle, 1977. Associate. My contribution of $ ___ is in addition to the subscription price and is • Aging. By Henri J .M. Nouwen and Walter J. tax deductible. Gaffney. Doubleday, New York, 1974. • The Aging Game: Success, Sanity and Sex After D Address change or correction: Sixty. By Barbara G. Anderson. McGraw-Hill, New (1) For your old address, send your address label from a recent issue of York, 1979. FRIENDS JOURNAL, or write the • Aging and the Human Spirit: A Reader in Relig­ numbers from the top right of your address ion and Gerontology. By Carol LeFevre and Perry • Understanding Aging Parents. By Andrew D. label here: LeFevre. Exploration, Chicago, 1981. Lester. Westminster, Philadelphia, 1980.

or give your name and old zip code here: • Avoiding Drown.ing and Seeing the "Me": An • The View From 80. By Malcolm Cowley. Viking, Essay on Old People and Loneliness. By David New York, 1980. E. W. Holden. Argenta Friends School Press, Ar­ (2) Give your name and new address below: genta, B.C., 1981. • You and Your Aging Parent: The Modem Fam­ ily's Guide to Emotional, Physical, and Financial Name • Don't Give Up on an Aging Parent. By Problems. By Barbara Silverstone and Helen Kan­ Lawrence Galton. Crown, New York, 1975. del Hyman. Pantheon, New York, 1982. Address • An Easier Way: Handbook for the Elderly and Handicapped. By Jean Vieth Sargent. Iowa State Zip University, Ames, Iowa, 1981. D This is a gift subscription in my name for : Organizations • A Good Age. Alex Comfort. Simon and • American Association of Retired Persons Name ------Schuster, New York, 1976. (AARP), 1909 K St. NW, Washington, DC 20049. Address ------• The Grieving Time: A Month by Month Account of Recovery From Loss. By Anne M. Brooks. Del­ • Cathedral College of the Laity, Episcopal apeake, Wilmington, Del., 1982. Church House, Mount Saint Alban, Washington, Zip DC 20016. • Growing Old: A View From Within. By Norma -=- JouRNAL. 150t Cheny St., Jacob. (Pendle Hill pamphlet #239), Wallingford, • Friends Committee on Aging, Philadelphia Phlltdelphi-,PA19102 Pa., 1981. Yearly Meeting, 1515 Cherry St., Philadelphia, PA 19102. ------• Growing Older, Getting Beuer: A Handbook for Women in the Second Half of Life. By Jane Por­ • Gray Panthers, 311 S. Juniper St., Philadelphia, cino. Addison-Wesley, Reading, Mass., 1983. PA 19107. • A Guide to Caring for and Coping with Aging • National Council on the Aging, Inc., 600 Mary­ Parents. By John Gillies. Nelson, Nashville, 1981. land Ave. SW, West Wing 100, Washington, DC 20024. Friends • Let the Patient Decide: A Doctor's Advice to Older Persons. By Louis S. Baer. Westminster, • Older Women's League, 1325 G St. NW, Lower Music Camp Philadelphia, 1978. Level B, Washington, DC 20005. Form•rly called Friends Music Institute • The Myth of Senility: Misconceptions About the Many of these organizations have local chapters. Brain and Aging. By Robin M. Henig. Doubleday, A four-week New York, 1981. swnmer program for 10-18 year-olds • Nobody Ever Died of Old Age. By Sharon Cur­ Periodicals/Catalogues emphasizing tin. Little Brown, Boston, 1972. • Aging. Published by H.H.S. (U.S. government Music-Quakerism • Old Enough to Feel Better: A Medical Guide for Community Seniors. By Michael Gordon. Chilton, Radnor; publication) six times a year. $15. Superintendent Pa., 1981. of Documents, G.P.O. Washington, DC 20402. June 29-July 27 • Creative Aging Journal. Friends United Meeting, at Barnesville, Ohio • The "Old" Speak Out. By Bonnie Bluh. Hori­ zon, New York, 1979. Meeting Ministries Commission, 101 Quaker Hill Write: FMC, P.O. Box 427, Drive, Richmond, IN 47374. Yellow Springs, Ohio 45387 • Our Older Friends: A Guide for Visitors. By Joel Keyes. Fortress, Philadelphia, 1983. • Friends United Meeting Creative Aging Library for brochure. Ph. 513-767-1311. catalogue. Free copy from Creative Aging Library, • Planning for Your Retirement. Tony Lamb and 101 Quaker Hill Drive, Richmond, IN 47374. Dave Duffy. Penguin, New York, 1977. • Modem Maturity. Monthly magazine of the This Publication • Thirty Dirty Lies About Old. Hugh Downs. American Association of Retired Persons (AARP). is awilable in Microbm. Argus, Niles, Ill., 1979. 1909 K St. NW, Washington, DC 20049. Unhoersity Microfilm<; International • To Your Good Health: A Practical Guide for • Nica Inform. A publication of the National 300 Nonh :Z.:eb Road. Dept. P.R .. Ann Arbor, Mi. 48106 Older Americans, Their Families and Friends. By Interfaith Coalition on Aging, Inc., P.O. Box 1924, Robert Skeist. Chicago Review Press, Chicago, 1980. Athens, GA 30603.

28 February 15, 1986 FRIENDS J ouRNAL Marriages surgery at the University of Pennsylvania, medical director of Friends Hall, chief of surgery at Phila­ Maloney-Bailey-Max Bailey and Rosaleen delphia General Hospital when it closed in 1975, Maloney on November 16, 1985, at the First Bap­ and an active Rotarian, William Inouye was also IM¥estones tist Church in Waynesville, Ohio. Max is a member appreciated by his many friends and neighbors for of Miami (Ohio) Meeting. his beautiful garden, his quiet humor, and his con­ cern for the spiritual life of the meeting. Born of Celebration of Commitment Japanese parents in San Francisco in 1920 and in­ terned with his family in California in 1942, he Haosen-Sparks-William Roberts Sparks, Jr., and nevertheless reached his goal of becoming a doctor, Births Roger Charles Hansen on October 5, 1985, under graduating from Swarthmore College and the Cook-Kiri Hess Cook on November 9, 1985, to the care of Homewood (Md.) Meeting in Balti­ School of Medicine of the University of Penn­ Megan Hess and Sid Cook. Both parents are more. Both are members of Homewood Meeting. sylvania. He is survived by his wife, Eleanor; a members of Germantown (Pa.) Meeting. Her ma­ sister, Miyoko Bassett; three sons, David, Robert, ternal grandparents, Beverly and Dick Hess, are Deaths and Richard; and five grandchildren. members of Lancaster (Pa.) Meeting. Ayars-Rebecca Caudill Ayars, 86, on October 2, Undley-Amelia Ruger Lindley, 91, on November Wajda-Levie-Dylan Andrew Wajda-Levie on 1985, in Urbana, Ill. A beloved member of I, 1985, in Wallingford, Pa. Born in Tillson, N.Y., January 6 to Michael Wajda and Alison Levie. Urbana-Champaign (Ill.) Meeting, Rebecca en­ Amelia worked her way through Oakwood Friends Both parents are members of Harrisburg (Pa.) couraged those she met to develop their talents and School and Earlham College, where she graduated Meeting. ideas. A graduate of Wesleyan College and in 1920. The day after graduation she married WilHamson-Jesse Ian Williamson on November Vanderbilt University, she taught for two years in Lawrence Lindley. The young couple spent five 16, 1985, to Frances Williamson, a member of Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Later, she edited a maga­ years working with Indians in Oklahoma, and then Central Philadelphia (Pa.) Meeting, and Bruce G. zine for teen-age girls for the Methodist Publishing were transferred to Philadelphia, where Lawrence Williamson, a member of Springfield (Pa.) House in Nashville, Tenn. She was a prolific worked for the Indian Rights Association and Meeting. Jesse's paternal grandmother was Hazel writer; her many books include A Certain Small Amelia worked as a volunteer, speaking to schools Williamson of Wooster (Ohio) Meeting. Shepherd, A Pocketful of Cricket, and Did You and women's groups about Indian problems. A Carry the Flag Today, Charlie? The public library member of Media (Pa.) Meeting, Amelia was a in her hometown of Cumberland, Ky., is named recorded minister of New York Yearly Meeting. Adoption for her. She is survived by her husband, James, She was active in the religious and social activities Lambert-Gerald Jacob Lambert, on October 8, and a daughter, Rebecca Baker. of her community. She is survived by her husband, 1985, by Mary Louise and Marc A. Lambert. Inouye-William Y. Inouye, 64, on July 20, 1985, Lawrence; a son, L. Eldon, Jr.; five grandchildren; Gerald was born August 20, 1977. His mother is at home in Elkins Park, Pa., after a long and cou­ and six great-grandchildren. a member of Clear Creek (Ind.) Meeting, and his rageous struggle with mesothelioma, an asbestos­ Lucas-Livia Lucas, 78, on July 3, 1985, after a father is a member of Strawberry Creek (Calif.) linked form of cancer. A long-time member of long bout with cancer. For many years, Livia was Meeting. Abington (Pa.) Meeting, an emeritus professor of a member of Flushing (N.Y.) Meeting. Then for

A Wealth of Ideas for First-day School - Friends General Conference

~vingTheword Bl....__ _ Trash Bag Simulation - for Younger Youth Give each student a large plastic trash disguised- we might behave in ways we bag, asking the student to poke a hole in might not otherwise consider appropriate. the bottom for the head to fit through. Have Ask the class to identify classes or persons everyone put the bags on over their heads, who conceal their identity such as the Ku covering the upper body. Ask: What effect Klux Klan, bank robbers, church officials do the bags have? How do you feel about wearing vestments, etc. Ask how such being covered by a bag? What effect do the covering might free them to act different­ bags have on some of the aspects of your ! y. Ask the students to read Gen. 1 :26-31 identity? Does wearing these bags give you and Rom. 12:4-8 and discuss what the any clues as to why different people and passages imply about identity. Jointly com­ groups of people wear uniforms? Would pose a prayer of thanks in light of the you like wearing bags like these all the uniqueness and the discoveries of identity time? Why or why not? Talk about the safe­ and read it in unison. ty we feel when we are partially hidden or

This is part of one lesson taken from the Joint Educational Development (JED) Living the Word curriculum. There is a wealth of ideas and material available at FGC. For the FGC Catalog or more information on JED, write to Friends General Conference, 1520-B Race St., Philadelphia, PA 19102. Call Cindy Taylor, Religious Education Coordinator and our new Publications Manager (215) 241-7270 if you want to discuss ideas or problems.

FiuENDS JoURNAL February 15, 1986 29 ,! II years, she was a member of Sarasota (Fla.) Marie; and two sisters, Gail Newby Newhall and Meeting, and most recently she attended Celo Joy Newby Cronk. (N.C.) Meeting. Livia Lucas was born in Budapest Nicholson-Edith DeCou Nicholson, 83, on and came to the United States after World War November 4, 1985, in Richmond, Ind. A native Classified II. Her concerns for peace and international of Moorestown, N.J., she attended Moorestown dialogue continued until her death. Celo Meeting Friends School and graduated from Westtown in remains grateful to Livia for bringing her own inti­ Classified Rates 1921. She then attended the Philadelphia School Minimum charge $8. $.40 per word. mate prayer and the closeness of the Holy Spirit of Industrial Art for two years, until she married Classified/display ads are also available-$25 for into meeting for worship. E. Leslie Nicholson. They moved to Llanerch, Pa. t". $45 for 2". Please send payment with order. Newby-Richard Prouty Newby, 62, on December in 1928. Edith was a member of Lansdowne (Pa.) {A FRIENDS JOURNAL box number counts as three 9, 1985, in Muncie, Ind. Born in to a Quaker family Meeting. She moved to Richmond, Ind., after words.) Add 10% if boxed. 10% discount for three consecutive insertions, 25% for six. in Iowa, Richard decided early in his life to become Leslie died in 1977. She is survived by sons Ed, a pastor. As a student at William Penn College Dav, and Bob; a daughter, Edith Stackhouse; 2 Appearance of any advertisement does not imply endorsement by FRIENDS JOURNAL. he was pastor of Buffalo and Center Friends sisters, Elizabeth Wolcott and Carol Howard; 13 meetings in Iowa. He was recorded a Friends­ grandchildren; and 10 great-grandchildren. Copy deadline: 35 days before publication. minister in Iowa Yearly Meeting in 1945, the year Thompson-Carney S. Thompson, 95, on he graduated from college. He then was a pastor September 19, 1985. A life-long resident and of meetings in Kansas and Minnesota, and of farmer in O'Brien County, Iowa, Carney was an Accommodations Friends Memorial Meeting in Muncie, Ind., twice, active, much-loved member of Paullina (Iowa) most recently in 1974-85. He was instrumental in London? Stay at the Penn Club, Bedford Place, London Meeting. His wife Mary Hobson Thompson, son WCIB 5JH. Friendly atmosphere. Central for Friends starting Friends School, a preschool institution Wendell Thompson, and daughter Hazel William­ House, West End, concerts, theater, British Museum, housed in the Friends church and open to the com­ son preceded him in death. He is survived by six university, and excursions. Telephone Ot -636-4718. munity. After retiring as full-time pastor at Friends grandchildren, Virginia Wilson, Ann Armstrong, Washington, O.C.-bed end breekfat. Capitol Hill Memorial Church, Richard was pastor at Back Bruce G. Williamson, Victoria M. Williamson, location. Reservations advisable. William Penn House, 515 Creek (Ind.) Meeting. He was also active in civic Pamela J. Williamson, and Wenda F. Williamson­ E. Capitol St., Washington, DC 20003. Telephone: (202) and humanitarian affairs in Muncie. He had served Hymes; and a brother, Isaac Thompson. 543-5560. on the board of trustees of Friends University, Mexico City Friends Center. Pleasant, reasonable Van Nostrand-Iris Van Nostrand, 88, on Septem­ Earlham College, and William Penn College, from accommodations. Reservations. Directors, Case de los ber 20, 1985, in Greenport, N.Y. Iris was a former Amigos, Ignacio Mariscal 132, Mexico 1, D.F. Friends which he received an honorary doctor of divinity member of Manhasset (N.Y.) and Jericho (N.Y.) meeting. Sundays 11 a.m. Phone: 705-0521 . degree in May 1985. The citation mentioned that meetings, and later of Southold Executive (N.Y.) he was being honored for his "exemplary work Meeting. She is survived by a son, Robert; a New York City, Penlngton Frlende House, 215 E. among Friends as pastor, teacher, author, active 15th St. . New York, NY 10003. Friendly lodging at daughter, Valerie Montgomery; four grandchil­ member, and leader of significant Friends pro­ reasonable rates. Single and double occupancy, in· dren; and three great-grandchildren. breakfast grams." Richard Newby is survived by his wife, eludes delicious and evening meal. A country Correction: Under births (12/15/ 85) Tacy Bell inn in the heart of Manhattan. Call ahead for reser­ Doris; a daughter, Darlene Ann; two sons, James vations: (212) 673-1730. Richard and John Charles; a granddaughter, Alicia Emens was incorrectly listed as Tracy Bell Emens. CHANDLER HALL HEALTH SERVICES Buck Road and Barclay Street, Newtown, PA 18940

SKILLED NURSING FACILITY PERSONAL CARE HOME CARE COMPANION SERVICE • Registered Nurses RESPITE CARE • Physical Therapy ADULT DAY CARE • Occupational Therapy TRAINING • Speech Therapy CONSULTATION • Medical Social Work TRANSPORTATION HOSPICE CARE A MEDICARE CERTIFIED AGENCY Expansion completion summer 1986 • Applications now being accepted. Contact Admissions Director at (215) 860-4000 or 968-4786.

30 February 15, 1986 F'IuENDS J oURNAL Southeut Florldll, lake Worth. Comfortable, quiet ing applications lor residency. Please inquire at (212) Single Booklover. gets cultured, single, widowed, or 673-1730, or write Cathi Belcher, 215 E. 15th St., New York, atmosphere. Walk, bike, trolley to ocean, restaurants, divorced persons acquainted. Nationwide. Run by Friends. village, meeting. (305) 582-4027, 582-1848 (messages). NY 10003. Established 1970. Write Box 117, Gradyville, PA 19039, or Powell HouM. Old Chatham, N.Y., near Albany in Colum­ call (215) 358-5049. bia County. Reservations necessary. AD 1, Box 160, Old For Sale Chatham, NY 12136. (518) 794-8811 . Programs available. Handwoven Guatemalan fabric, 100% cotton. large Wllahlngton, D.C. Bed and breakfaat in Friendly home. selection of contemporary and traditional designs. $5/yd., Convenient location. Children welcome. Reservations. less for bulk orders. Samples, $3 (refundable). La Paloma, Stony Run Frlenda Meeting is seeking applicants lor a lull­ Monthly residence also available. (202) 265-4144 eves. and Box 7824-FJ, Missoula, MT 59807. Partial profits aid time posnion as executive secretary. For job description and weekends. Central American refugees. information wrneto: Search Cornmntee, Stony Run Friiends Meeting, 5116 N. Charles St., Baltimore, MD 21210. (301) Bed and breakfaat In Jamaica. Idyllic rural setting ten Bamboo nutee, kalimbas, drums, tapes. 2 stamps: Box 273 435-3773. miles from Montego Bay. Children welcome. Episcopal Mountainview, HI 96771 . rector and Quaker wile. Full details from: Patricia 011ey, ~arch Interne. Three positions available assisting St. Mary's Rectory, P.O. Box 2, Montpelier, St. James, FCNL's lobbyists w~h legislative work. These are 11-month Jamaica. Housing Needed paid assignments beginning Sept. 1, 1986. Duties include Quaker, profeaalonal, alngle parent with two school-age research, writing, monhoring issues, attending hearings and Books and Publications daughters (no pets and no smoking) needs a two-bedroom coalhion meetings, maintaining clipping and issue files. Ap­ plications close March 15, 1986. For information write or llociU-Quaker aplrltual clasalcs, history, biography, and apartment or house. Can exchange care-taking for reasonable rent. Excellent references. West Chester, call Friends Committee on National Legislation, 245 2nd current Quaker experience published by Friends United St. NE, Washington, DC 20002, (202) 547~ . Press, 101-A Quaker Hill Dr., Richmond, IN 47374. Write eastern Chester County, western Main Line, Pa. Karen Murphy, (215) 692-4177. American Frlenda Service Committee seeks: Quaker lor free catalogue. Reprnentatlve at United Nations Office, NYC: senior Three Hundred Yean~ and Mora of Third Ha~en position lor Friend to represent world body of Quakers, Quaker/am, Kenneth Carroll. $9.75 including postage. Opportunity organize conferences, seminars; supervise staff and Molly Bond, treasurer, Claiborne, MD 21624. Develop your own bualneaa with a very supportive budget; give leadership to program. Requires: broad ex­ Magazine MmpiH. Free listing of over 150 magazines company with excellent ethics, a proven success formula, perience in international affairs, strong analytic and com­ offering a sample copy-$.50 a sample. Send stamped, and superior products. We are Friends. Call (215) 328-1710. munication skills, ac;jministrative and program experience, self-addressed 110 envelope to: Publishers Exchange, P.O. knowledge of UN. Also director, Quaker HouM In NYC: Box 220, Dept. 216A, Dunellen, NJ 08812. Personal residential position involving arrangements for meals, Sheepl Magazine. Learn wool crafts, spinning, sheep­ meetings, seminars. Requires: skills lor managing,.!_ raising savvy, and more. Free sample issue, write: P.O. Box Ca aaaaldo. La kato regardas Ia muso. La muso regardas hospitality center and building; ftexibilhy, patience, stamina, 329, Jefferson, WI 53549. Ia lromago. La taso esas sur Ia tablo. Me drinkas teo de good humor. Positions can be filled by a couple or single Ia taso. Me sidas ye Ia tablo. Me skribas letro. To learn ldo, persons. Starting late '86; inhial application deadline March Communities please write Tom Todd, 3709 West Main, Kalamazoo, Ml 15. Contact: Karen Cromley, AFSC, 1501 Cherry St., 49007. Philadelphia, PA 19102. AFSC is an Affirmative Ac­ lntere.ted In IMng In a Quaker community while studying tion/Equal Opportunhy Employer. Concerned alngiH newsletter links compatible singles or working in Manhattan? Penington Friends House, in the concerned about peace, environment; nationwide, all areas. Gramercy Park area, is adjacent to the 15th St. Meeting Free sample: Box 7737-F, Berkeley, CA 94707. Paator wanted. Starting July 1, 1986, in a small rural and AFSC offices, and only 15 minutes from downtown or Hudson Valley community 75 miles north of New York If you are ualng, or planning to use, dBASE Ill, for your midtown Manhattan. Recently renovated and undergoing City. For details contact Jerome Hurd, P.O. Box 409, meeting records, please contact George Webb, 5622 spiritual revitalization, PFH is based on mutual respon­ Clintondale, NY 12515. sibility, trust, and Friendly values. We are now accept- Alhambra Ave., Baltimore, MD 21212. (301) 435-6928.

TOTAL RETIREMENT LIVING • 1- & 2-bedroom apartments • 80-bed skilled nursing facility • indoor heated swimming pool • physical therapy facility • 3 meals daily • on 45 acres in Historic Bucks County, Pa.

Write For Complete Brochure: 280 Middle Holland Road, Holland, PA 18966 (215) 322-6100, ext. 40

A non-sectarian life care community offering gracious, independent living.

FRIENDS JouRNAL February 15, 1986 31 Executive Director, Life Care Community. Leader in life WILLIAM PENN CHARTER SCHOOL Est. 1689 care for the elderly seeks director to provide long-term Kindergarten leadership for established retirement community. Friends Lifetime Care Center of Baltimore, Inc., known as J. Three Centuries of Quaker Education Through TweHth Grade Broad mead, is a nonprofit life care community. A majority of its Board of Trustees are members of the Religious Socie­ ty of Friends. Locatad on 80 acres of land, 10 miles north Penn Charter's coeducational, preparatory environment stresses excellence in of Baltimore, Md., the community serves 380 residents liv­ ing in 240 ILU (garden-styte apartments) and 66 SNF bads, academics, arts and athletics. Penn Charter is committed to nurturing girls and boys f.-..lll_us 35 PCU, food service facilities, and a community of diversified economic and social backgrounds in an atmosphere designed to center. The community has a staff of approximately 200, stimulate each student to work to his or her fullest potential. including a part-time madical director. Applicants should have general administrative and managerial skills and ex­ Applications from Quaker students and teachers are Invited. perience in long-term care, sensitivity to the needs of older people, knowladge of madical and fiscal issues affecting Earl J. Ball III 3000 W. School House Lane the elderly, and be sympathetic to the social concerns and business practices of Friends. Position available March 15, Headmaster Philadelphia. PA 19144 1986. Send resumes to: Lois Forbush, president, Friends Lifetime Care Center, 1211 Berwick Road, Ruxton, MD 21204. Broadmead is an equal opportunity employer.

FRIENDS ACADEMY

A Quaker-affiliatad, co-educational country day school including over 690 students in grades pre-kinder­ garten through 12. A strong .. lectad student body, made div«M by our cosmopolitan community and a generous scholar­ ship program, Is nurtured by a full- and part-time faculty of •75. Friends Academy, which is over 100 years old, seeks to provide demanding, somewhat traditional but lively, college preparatory, academic, athletic, and activit lee program within a friendly, supportive atmos­ phere. Each year we usually -'< one or more top-rate beginner or experienced and Verll8tile teachers who are strong in the classroom and competent and willing to coach boys' and girts' team sports. We-'< teachers who can command the respect and affactlon of young people and coleagues. Write to Frederic B. Withington, Head­ master, Friends Academy, Locust Valley, NY 11580.

~WOODSCOUR~•------~ New Friends elerrlei1Wfy school seeks a Director/Teacher and a Teacher. School ownad by Adelphi Meeting (suburban Washington), opening in September 1986, Now available-New one-bedroom grades K-3. Applicants should be creative, dynamic, and organized, with experience in elementary education and/or Friends schools, comfortable with Quakerism and Quaker apartments for senior citizens consensus process. Salary/benefits negotiable. For information and application, send inquiry letter and resume by February 28 to Search Committee, Friends Community contact: School, 2303 Metzerott Road, Adelphi, MD 20783. Construction compeny requires a truck driver-gofer to Robert Smith, Administrator assist our construction superintendent. Cali Henry Weis. Friends Home at Woodstown (215) 468-4800. 1W()(X)STOWN Woodstown, NJ 08098 Telephone (609) 769-1500 Retirement Centers RETIREMENT CO-OP Blackwater Homestead can be your retirement home. Locatad on 50 acres in the foothills of Virginia's Blue Ridge, 70 miles from Washington, D.C., Blackwater is Do yOY h.ve • service to offer, • product to sell, a solar-heated retirement project for three families. Make • Splash In • t•lent to promote; •nnouncements, mesuges, or Each family occupies its own complete apartment and person•l requests? By ~ertlslng In FRIENDS JOUR· shares the use of five extra badrooms, two extra baths, NAL yOY c•n help yOYrself •nc:t the publlc•tlon •t FRI.NDS .JOURNAL a large mult~purpose room, laundry and storage rooms, the ume time. a sauna, an indoor swimming pool, and a large garden. Two couples, ages 64 to 69, seek a third family. You can enjoy the benefits of rural living without the handi· cap of being pinnad down by the garden, pets, and chickens, and you can have complete privacy along with the support of an extended family as you grow older. We hope to avoid the eventual necessity of living with our children or in a retirement institution. One-third ownership of Blackwater involves an investment of approximately $160,000, most of which can be financed. All inclusive monthly expenses are about $300 per family. For more information write to Blackwater Homestead, Ate. 1, Box 301 Boston, VA 22713, or p hone (703) 547-3920 or 547-3934.

32 February 15, 1986 FRIENDS JouRNAL Friends HouM. Fifty apartments, meals, pets, personal Counaallng-psychotherllpy for individuals, couples, Moving to North Carolina? Maybe David Brown, a Quaker assistance, and hea~h care in Friendly, lively communal and families in the privacy of the home. Visiting Home real estate broker, can help. Contact him at 1208 Pinewood center close to cultural and commercial amenities. 684 Therapists Association. (215) 543-7525. Drive, Greensboro, NC 27410. (919) 294-2095. Benicia Drive, Santa Rose, CA 95405. YNrty Meeting Friends Home (The McCutchen), 21 Fruatratad by ""* clutter? Office and household records Summer Camps ~Ave . , North Plainfield, NJ 07060. (201) 755-8600. organized for your special needs. Filing systems design­ Apartments, boarding, and nursing home facilities on two ed, work spaces planned, organizing solutions for moving New, 1188, at Friends Music camp (formerly called acres of lawn; gardens and trees. Write for further or retirement. Horwitz Information Services, (215) 544-8376. Friends Music Institute): Age range extended to include information to Marianne A. Longstreet, Administrator. ages 10, 11 . Write FMC, P.O. Box 427, Yellow Springs, OH A Family of Friends. New England Friends Home, 86 45387. (513) 767-1311 . Turkey Hill Lane, Hingham, MA 02043. Telephone: (617) Journey's End Farm Camp is a farm devoted to children 749-3556. for eight weeks each summer. Cows, calves, burros, chicks to care for. Gardening, swimming, fishing, nature, ceramics, Schools shop. A wholesome, supervised program centered in the life of a Quaker farm family. For 35 boys and girts, 7-12 Sandy Spring Friends School, Sandy Spring, Maryland years. Ralph and Marie Curtis, Box 136, Newfoundland, PA 20860, (301) n4-7455. 9th through 121h grade, day and 18445. (71?) 689-2353. boarding; 6th through 8th grades day only. Small academic classes, arts, twice weekly meeting for worship, sports, service projects, intersession projects. Individual approach, Summer Rentals challenging supportive atmosphere. Rural campus, urban Shelter Island: Furnished, 3 bedrooms, 2 baths, living, din­ area. Headmaster: Edwin Hinshaw. School mollo: " Let your ing, electric kitchen with dishwasher, washer, dryer, study, lives speak." 4 skylights, screened porch and deck. Ground floor ramped Quaker School at Horsham, 318 Meetinghouse Road, for disabled. Water view. Overlooks Friends meeting site. Horsham, PA 19044. (215) 674·2875. A friendly, caring Friends meeting group/s, famlly/ies ideal. Memorial Day to environment where children with learning d isebilities can CALLIGRAPHY Labor. $8M. (516) 747-6092, evenings, weekends, or 6 grow in skills and self-esteem. Small classes. Grades one Butler Place, Garden City, NY 11 ~ . through six. IDia.ne~marot{co Adirondacks. Housekeeping cabins on natural, living lake. The Meeting School, a challenge to creative living and 215·]66 -S]')J Swim, boat, fish, hike, bike, play, study. (215) 922-a975 or learning. A Quaker high school that encourages individual write Dreby, Cranberry Lake, NY 12927. growth through strong academics and an equally demand­ ing emphasis on community cooperation. Students live in faculty homes. Art and farm programs. C<>-ed, boarding, General Contractor. Repairs or alterations on old or Wanted grades 9-12 and post grad, college prep. Founded in 1957. historical buildings. Storm and fire damage restored. John Can you help this young man? Experienced milker and Rindge NH 03461 . (603) 899-3366. File, 1147 Bloomdale Road, Philadelphia, PA 19115. farmhand looking for work on a dairy farm. He has a learn­ 464-2207. ing disability but learns farm routines well. Willing to work Services Offered Need TypeMitlng? FRIENOS JouRNAL's typesetting service for small stipend plus room and board on a farm where can g ive your newsletters , brochures, pamphlets, there are kind and patient people. Excellent health, 21 years Thinking of moving to Bucks Co., Pa? Call Howard Lunin manuscripts, etc.,a clear, clean, professional format that old. If you can help or know someone who can, please con­ at WEICHERT CO. REALTORS. For information, (215) is easily read. We provide fast, friendly typesetting service tact Bain or Marj Davis, RD 2, Box 114 A , Middletown, NY 345-7171 . Member Doylestown Meeting. at reasonable rates. Call Joy Martin at (215) 241·7116. 10940. (914) 462-9266.

• Apartments for Independent Living • Personal Care Boarding Home A Quaker-Sponsored • Health Care Center Retirement Community

Call or Write Today for More Information (215) 844-0700 6300 Greene Street Philadelphia, PA 19144

FR.IENDS JoURNAL February 15, 1986 33 Hypki, Cinder /4 FRIENDS JOURNAL lnnerst, Stuart 3/ Jack, Homer A. 56 Jackson, Laura L. 139 James, Etta Marie 88 Jeavons, Thomas H. 38, 152 Jim 93 Index Johnson, Sonia 42 Johnston, William E., Jr. /48 Kenworthy, Leonard S. 82 How to Use This Index Deming, Vinton 2, 5, 7, 18, 36, 47, 48, 60, Kerman, Kate 77 74, 75, 8/, 90, 92, 124, /26, 135, /41, 142, Kilpack, Ruth Geibel 57 The numbers after the author and subject entries /46 King, Martin Luther, Jr. 94 below refer to the numbered articles beginning on DiRienzi, Dorothy A. 95 Knudsen-Hoffman, Gene /06 the next page. Articles are listed alphabetically by Donaghy, Mary 83 Koppelman, Joan 24 title and include author, issue, and page number. Doty, Hi 30, 79, /27, 145 Lacey, Paul A. 108 All book reviews and poetry are listed by author. Reports are listed by organization. Doudna, Greg //8 Lakey, George 8 Downing, Allison /4, /03 LaMotte, Alfred K. 109 Dreamdigger, Ruth //2 Lampen, Diana 1 DuBois, Rachel Davis 108 Larrabee, Kent R. 66 Authors Eldridge, Richard 15, 16 Lauer, Robert Frederick 49 Ellin, Stanley /08 Lazar, Ed /00 Adams, Michael K. 44 Emerson, Mark F. 53 Levering, Patty 140 Alger, Louisa /44 McCauley, David 34 Aron, Lucy /57 English, James T. /25 McDonald, Ron 6, 107 Bacon, Margaret Hope 9 Fardelmann, Charlotte 85 80, 1/9 Mace, David 108 Bailey, Moses 108, 159 Ferm, Carol Virginia 96, /33, 108 Milne, Teddy 39 Barnett, Kerttu 35 Fingesten, Peter Fletcher, David J. 23 Moen, Elizabeth 121 Barnhart, Betty 1 7 99 Morley, Barry /08 Bear, Richard S. /50 Forbush, Bliss Nelson, Marjorie E. Bell, John 134 Friend, Anne 9/ 65 Oates, David 76 Benson, Lewis 22 Gabbertas, Ray /6/ 26 Berrigan, Daniel 87 Gibas, Grace 98 Obadia, Cynthia Best, Jim 122 Gilbert, Joan 7/ Olmsted, Ruth 97 Palmer, Candida 20, 108 Birchard, Bruce J/3 Gilmore, Patricia Kent /38 Gilpin, Mariellen 0. Peerless, David J. 25 Boardman, Elizabeth Jelinek 105 50 Grosser, Kate /36 Penberthy, Jill 160 Bradley, Francis E. J/7 /49 Pfeil, Cliff 4/ Brainerd, Carol P. 153 Gummere, John F. Harris, Arthur S., Jr. 128 Preuss, Nancy 6/ Brandenburg, Kurt 37 Hartzell, Dennis J. J/5 Reynolds, Earle /29 Bratis, Dean C. T. 78 Reynolds, Wilfred 55 Brinton, Howard H. /32 Hastings, George S. 27 130 Rifkin, Arthur A. 1/0 Bronner, Edwin B. 2/, 84 Hernandez, Albert W. 29 Brooks, Helen M. 108 Hirabayashi, Gordon /56 Rose, Ralph A. Rossman, Vern 1// Browne, Gordon 58 Hoare, Ted /54 Hodgkin, Christopher 123 Sanders, Olcutt 64 Burt, Steve 62 Hostetler, Virginia A. 120 Scott, Anne Farrar /31 Cadbury, Henry J. 137 /3 Shore, Marjorie 32 Campbell, Ruth G. 43 Howe, Lind?. A. Humes, Anne 59 Smith, Selden W. 28 Celaya, Pilar /4 Snyder, Audrey /9 Clark, Marguerite /5/ Spears, Larry 46 Clark, Rebecca Timbres 116 Spears, Lawrence D. 45 Clarke, Eleanor Stabler 3 Spears, Lillian 70 Conger, Susan F. 89 Spickard, Jim 68 Cocks, Nancy M. 139 Stern, Christopher 12 Crauder, Renee C. /58 Sutton, Marshall 0. 63 Cronk, Elwood 72 Taylor, Thomas F. 54 Crowe, Avis /04 Urner, Carol 86 Darling, Dorothy /47 Van Dellen, Rich 101 Walker, Richard L. 73 Watson, Elizabeth /08, //4 Wiegers, Michael 51 Winston, Lindley M. 33 Wolseley, Isabel Champ 69 Wright, Margaret Haworth //, 67, /55 Yarnall, Elizabeth Biddle 102 Young, Mildred Binns 40 Yungblut, John /43 Zimmermann, Helen W. 4

34 February /5, /986 FRIENDS JouRNAL Friends Meeting / 7, 19, 20, 25, 38, 43, 44, Race 94, 151 45, 53, 58, 61, 74, 79, 80, 84, 96, 99, /OJ, Religion and the World /, 35, 85, /33 I 19, 124, /34, 144, 158, 160, 16/ Sanctuary /4, 4/, 103, 122 Subjects Games and Puzzles 4 Science and Technology 30 Healing 56, 57, 69, 93, 95, 126, /40 Self-Realization 24, 40, 42, 55, 70, /04, Abortion 98 History 3, 9, I 1, 21, 22, 33, 43, 54, 57, 63, /40, 157 Advancement 46, 64, 130, 154 67, 71, 72, 78, 82, 89, 99, 101, 102, 118, Sexism 42, /38, 139 Animal Rights 71, 127 127, 128, 132, 133, 137, 145, 150, 152, 153, Simplicity 120 Bible 10 155, 156 South Africa 5 Biblical Analysis 109, 140, 150, 159 Human Rights 26, 42 Spiritual Growth 9, 12, 38, 40, 50, 68, 73, Capital Punishment 3 I Humor 2, 44, 129, 134, 159 86, 93, 96, 101, /04, 107, 109, I 14, I 16, Children 15, 45, 77, 79, 97 International 7, 8, /4, 18, 28, 29, 34, 35, 140, /43, /58 Christmas 16, 49 39, 41, 51, 57, 85, 88, 105, 106, 112, 117, Stewardship 49, 120, 121 Christocentrism 6, 22, 110, 150, 152 121, 147, 148 U.S./USSR Reconciliation 6, 34, 39, 66, Citizen's Rights 52, 87, 94, 11 I , 156 Music 47, 54, 89 106,147 Community 38, 60, 1/4, 143 Native Americans 59, 78, 85 War Tax Resistance 123, 160 Conscientious Objection 23, 36, 91, 128 Nonviolence 8, 9, 1/, 15, 18, 21, 28, 42, Worship Sharing 158 Death 17, 24, 70, 84, 95, 161 56, 69, 83, 87, 88, 94, 100, 105, 107, 111, Women's Rights 42, 98, 138, 139 Deterrence 8, 148 119, 124, 145, 148, /55 Disarmament 8, 56, 66, 87, 100, 11 I, 115, Personal Presence 27, 41, 42, 47, 55, 60, 119, 131, 136, 148 63, 67, 73, 74, 92, 95, 104, I /3, 115, 125, Departments Draft 36 135, 149, 151, 155, 157 Education 15, 32, 37, 48, 51, 77, 81, 97, Personalities 28, 30, 65, 70, 72, 79, 82, 83, Among Friends 2, 5, 7, 18, 36, 47, 48, 60, 117, 125, 149 93, 108, 131, 137, /44, 155 74, 75, 81, 90, 92, 124, 126, 135, 141, 142, Evil 113 Political Action 9, 14, 21, 26, 29, 52, 66, 146 Family 45, 74, 77, 126, 135 68, 76, 82, 87, 88, 105, 107, 111, 117, 119, Junior Journal 4/ 15, 611-15, 10115 Fiction 13 124, 131, 136, 156 News From QUNO 26, 136 Friends Institutions 22, 29, 32, 37, 51, 59, Prayer 50 Quaker Philately 30, 79, 127, 145 61, 85, 99, 102, 117, 118, 121, 125, 141, Prisons 70 149, 154 Profanity 62 fRIENDS JouRNAL Activities 3, 46, 64, 75, Quakerism Today 6, 12, 58, 68, 110, 118, 90, 141, 142, 146, 153 130

Articles 21. "Commitment for Conscience' Sake in the 17th Century and Today," Edwin B. Bronner, 111-15: 10-/J I. "Across the Sectarian Divide," Diana Lampen, 411: 6-7 22. "Concern of the New Foundation Movement, The," Lewis 2. "Advices for the Winter Weary,'' Vinton Deming, 3/ 1: 2 Benson, 4/ 1: 10-/J 3. "After Thirty Years,'' Eleanor Stabler Clarke, 7/ 1-15: 3-4 23. "Conscientious Objection in the 'Voluntary' Armed Services: How 4. "Aiphabestiary: For Kate, Eleanor, and Alice, An,'' Helen W. Friends Can Help," David J. Fletcher, 11/1: 8-11 Zimmermann, 11/15: 18 24. "Conscious Living and Conscious Dying," Joan Koppelman, 2/1: 4 5. "Amanda Kwadi-A Plea for Justice,'' Vinton Deming, 10/ 1: 2 25. "Consensus-A Dangerous Practice," David J. Peerless, 3/15: 17 6. "Apologetic or Liberating Religion,'' Ron McDonald, 1/ 1-15 : 4-6 26. "Convention Against Torture, The," Cynthia Obadia, 3/ 1: 18 7. "Approaching the Mountain,'' Vinton Deming, 2/1: 2 27. "Cows Will Be Cows," George S. Hastings, 8/ 1-15: 3 8. "Arms Race as Addiction: Deterrence and Spiritual Challenge," 28. "Creating the Space for Nonviolence," Selden W. Smith, 9/ 1-15: George Lakey, 5/ 1: 10-JJ 12-13 9. "Belief Into Action, Action Into Belief: Religious and Political 29. "Crossroads for Peace," Ralph A. Rose, 11/1: 14-15 Aspects of Effective Peacemaking,'' Margaret Hope Bacon, 2/15: 7-9 30. " David William Fraser: From Health Research to Swarthmore College," Hi Doty, 4/ 15: 25 10. "Bible Alphabet, A,'' 12/15: 14-15 31. "Death Penalty, An Anachronism, The," Stuart Innerst, II. "Calcutta Miracle, The,'' Margaret Haworth Wright, 1/1-15: 7/1-15: 15-16 14- 15 32. " Dialogue Process: An Alternative to Censorship, The," Marjorie 12. "Call to Come Home, A," Christopher Stern, 5/ 15: 11- 12 Shore, 4/ 15: 18-19 13. "Caretaker's Dream, The,'' Linda A. Howe, 2/15: 3-4 33. "Did Philadelphia Quakers Really Fail?" Lindley M. Winston, 14. "Celaya Family Testimony, The," Pilar Celaya, translated by 3/ 15: 14-16 Cinder Hypki and Allison Downing, 10/ 1: 5 34. " Discovering Common Peace Priorities," David McCauley, 2/1: 15. "Child's Peace, A,'' Richard Eldridge, 4/ 15: 7 10-12 16. "Christmas Story, A,'' Richard Eldridge, 12/15: 4-5 35. "'Do No Evil, Do Only Good,' " Kerttu Barnett, 12/15: 10-12 17. "Clearness Committee for Dying,'' Betty Barnhart, 2/1: 5 36. "Draft Dolls, Not Students,'' Vinton Deming, 11/1: 2 18. "Climbing to Higher Places,'' Vinton Deming, 611-15: 2 37. "Elitism and Quakerism in Friends Schools,'' Kurt Brandenburg, 19. "Cobscook Friends: An Acorn Meeting,'' Audrey Snyder, 4/ 15: 10-11 11/1: 4-5 38. "Encountering the Teacher: The Beginning of Community,'' 20. "Coming With Hearts and Minds Prepared," Candida Palmer, Thomas H. Jeavons, 10/ 1: 12-14 7/1-15: 5-6 39. "Exploring the Paradoxes,'' Teddy Milne, 2/ 1: 12-13

FRIENDS JOURNAL February 15, 1986 35 40. "Expression of Religion in Our Private Life," Mildred Binns 85. "Message From Below the Equator, A," Charlotte Fardelmann, Young, 7/1-15: 8-10 3/ 1: 6-8 41. "Father Kino, the Border Patrol, and the Waters of Babapoc," 86. " Modern Lazarus, A,'' Carol Urner, 4/ 1: 5 Cliff Pfeil, 5/1: 14 87. "Modest Proposal to the Court, A,'' Daniel Berrigan, 5/ 15: 7-8 42. "Feminism: The CenterPeace," Sonia Johnson, 10/ 1: 6-10 88. "More Light Than Before: Peace and Friendship Caravan,'' Etta 43 . "Fierce Feathers, 1955," Ruth G. Campbell, 7/1-15: 20-21 Marie James, 2/ 1: 17 44. "Fifth Major Fidget Effect, The," Michael K. Adams, 3/15: 3 89. "Music and the Society of Friends,'' Susan F. Conger, 12/1: 4-7 45 . " Forcing Children to Meeting," Lawrence D. Spears, 6/1-15: 90. "New Face to the Future, A,'' Vinton Deming, 10115: 2 12-13 91. "New Look at Conscientious Objection, A,'' Anne Friend, 11/1: 7 46. "Friendly Persuasion," Larry Spears, 2/ 15: 13 92. "New Stirrings of Life and Hope," Vinton Deming, 4/ 1: 2 47. "Friendly Rhythms," Vinton Deming, 12/1: 2 93. " Night Visitor, The," Jim, 111-15: 3 48 . "Further Deprivation," Vinton Deming, 11/15: 2 94. "Nonviolence and Racial Justice," Martin Luther King, Jr., 49. "God in Unlikely Places," Robert Frederick Lauer, 12/15: 3 7/ 1-15: 17 50. "God, It's You I Love," Mariellen 0. Gilpin, 10/ 1: JJ 95. "Of Feathers and Floods," Dorothy A. DiRienzi, 2/ 1: 3 51. "Guests of the Chinese People," Michael Wiegers, 4/ 15: 4-6 96. "On Contemplation,'' Peter Fingesten, 7/ 1-15: 7 52. "Guidelines for Civil Disobedience," 5/ 15: 9-10 97. " On Educational Leadership,'' Ruth Olmsted, 4/ 15: 12-13 53. "Gwynedd Meeting: Lively and Vigorous," Mark F. Emerson, 98. "On Taking Away the Occasion for Abortion,'' Grace Gibas, 4/ 1: 15-17 3/ 1: 12-13 54. " Harmony, Community, and Listening: Friends Testimonies and 99. "On the Recording of Ministers,'' Bliss Forbush, 9/ 1-15: 5-6 Music," Thomas F. Taylor, 12/ 1: 8-ll 100. " Opportunity and a Challenge, An," Ed Lazar, 8/1-15: 9-JJ 55. "Hawk's Cry, The," Wilfred Reynolds, 3/ 1: 3 101. "Oxymoron: Joyful Suffering, An,'' Rich Van Dellen, 6/ 1-15: 6 56. "Hiroshima and Nagasaki: Nagging Ethical Dilemmas," Homer A. 102. "Oyster Crackers in the Spring,'' Elizabeth Biddle Yarnall, Jack, 8/1-15: 7-9 7/ 1-15: 24-25 57. "Hiroshima Maidens, The," Ruth Geibel Kilpack, 7/1-15: 18-19 103. "People of Hope,'' Allison Downing, 10/ 1: 4 58. " Holy Place, The," Gordon Browne, 10/ 15: 3-4 104. "Pheasants, Ferrets, and Hope,'' Avis Crowe, 4/ 1: 3 59. "Hope and Commitment Amid Great Need," Anne Humes, 105. "Phoenix Trip: Notes on a Quaker Mission to Haiphong, The,'' 3/ 15: 18 Elizabeth Jelinek Boardman, 11115: 6-10 60. "How Much Farther?" Vinton Deming, 5/ 1: 2 106. "Planting Seeds of Hope,'' Gene Knudsen-Hoffman, 2/ 1: 15-16 61. "I Wish You Silence," Nancy Preuss, 11 / 1: 6 107. "Postures of Peacemaking, The,'' Ron McDonald, 12/15: 6-9 62. "Identifying True Profanity," Steve Burt, 8/1-15: 12-13 108. " Quaker Authors Respond," Paul A. Lacey, Rachel Davis 63 . " 'If Thine Enemy Hunger . . . ,' " Marshall 0. Sutton, DuBois, Elizabeth G. Watson, Moses Bailey, Peter Fingesten, 7/1-15: 22-23 Candida Palmer, David Mace, Helen M. Brooks, Barry Morley, 64. "If You Can't Speak Up, At Least Answer Back," Olcutt Sanders, Stanley Ellin, 11/ 15: 3-5 2/ 15: 12 109. "Quaker Gospel of Original Beauty, The," Alfred K. LaMotte, 65. "In Memoriam: Sister Phi,'' Marjorie E. Nelson, 6/ 1-15: 3-4 6/ 1-15: 8-9 66. " Incident in Leningrad,'' Kent R. Larrabee, 5/ 15: 13-14 110. " Quaker Non-Creed, A," Arthur A. Rifkin, 4/ 1: 8-10 67. "Intruder in a Special Place,'' Margaret Haworth Wright, 11 I. "Quaker With a Hammer,'' Vern Rossman, 5/ 15: 6-8 3/ 15: 8-10 112. "Quick but Heartfelt View of Nicaragua, A,'' Ruth Dreamdigger, 68. "Inwardness and the Outward Way," Jim Spickard, 2/ 15: 5-6 12/ 1: 15-17 12-13 69. " Jelly Beans,'' Isabel Champ Wolseley, 5/ 15 : 4-5 113. " Recognizing Evil,'' Bruce Birchard, 12/ 15: 70. " Jimmy Lee Gray: Portrait of a Mississippi Death Row Inmate,'' 114. "Reconstituting the World," Elizabeth Watson, 10/ 15: 8-10 Lillian Spears, 3/ 15: 10-14 115. "Reflections on the Yorktown Naval Weapons Station,'' Dennis J. 71. "John Woolman and Animals,'' Joan Gilbert, 12/1: ll-12 Hartzell, 2/1: 8-9 72. " Judgment Day in Breeches,'' Elwood Cronk, 7/1-15: 12-13 116. "Religious Concept at Age 88, A,'' Rebecca Timbres Clark, 2/1: 9 73. "Kite, The,'' Richard L. Walker, 11 / 1: 3 117. "Removing the Barriers to Friendship,'' Francis E. Bradley, 4/ 15: 8-9 74. "Learning Our ABCs,'' Vinton Deming, 3/ 15: 2 118. "Returning to Quaker Roots," Greg Doudna, 5/ 15: 14-15 75. " Learning to Live With It,'' Vinton Deming, 12/15: 2 119. "Ribbon of Cloth, A,'' Carol Virginia Ferm, 10/ 15: JJ-13 76. "Lie of Politics, The,'' David Oates, 6/ 1-15: 10-12 120. "Riding in Style and Missing the Boat," Virginia A. Hostetler, 77. " Living Together, Learning Together,'' Kate Kerman, 4/ 15: 14-17 10/ 15: 17 78. "Loren Eiseley: Concealed Quaker,'' Dean C. T. Bratis, 121. "Right Sharing in India," Elizabeth Moen, 10/ 15: 14-16 9/1-15: 10-12 122. "Sanctuary: A Growing Network,'' Jim Best, 5/ 1: 15 79. "Love for the World's Children,'' Hi Doty, 11 / 15: ll-12 123. "Second Thoughts on the World Peace Tax Fund," Christopher 80. "Magic of Meeting, The," Carol Virginia Ferm, 6/ 1-15: 6-7 Hodgkin, 3/ 1: 8-10 81. "Making Way for Schools,'' Vinton Deming, 4/ 15: 2 124. "Seeking Another Path,'' Vinton Deming, 8/ 1-15: 2 82. " Margarethe Lachmund: Radiant Friend and Reconciler,'' Leonard 125. "Shaking Hands,'' James T. English, 4115: 3 S. Kenworthy, 11 / 15: 12-15 126. "Simple Request, A,'' Vinton Deming, 9/ 1-15: 2 83. " Margarita's Gifts,'' Mary Donaghy, 4/ 1: 14-15 127. "Sister Horse and Brother Ox," Hi Doty, 12/15: 18 84. "Memorial Meetings: Do We Need Them?" Edwin B. Bronner, 5/ 1: 4 128. "Some Friends From Cambridge,'' ArthurS. Harris, Jr., 11/1: 12-13

36 February 15, 1986 FRIENDs JouRNAL 129. "Some of My Best Friends Are Rocks," Earle Reynolds, 11 /15: 17 130. "Speaking to the Quaker Condition," Albert W. Hernandez, 111-15: 7-8 131. "Spring," Anne Farrer Scott, 3/15: 4-5 132. "Stand Still in the Light," Howard H. Brinton, 7/1-15: 14-15 133. "Standing in the Light," Peter Fingesten, 5/1: 6 134. "State of the Meeting," John Bell, 9/1-15: 9 135. "Step at a Time, A," Vinton Deming, 2/ 15: 2 136. "Survival of the Non-Proliferation Treaty, The," Kate Grosser, 8/1-15: 15-16 137. "Susan B. Anthony, Quaker," Henry J. Cadbury, 7/1-15: 10-11 138. "Ten Queries for Quaker Women," Patricia Kent Gilmore, 3/1: 14 139. "Ten Queries: Two Feminists Respond," Nancy M. Cocks and Laura L. Jackson, 8/1-15: 14-15 140. "To Forgive," Patty Levering, 5/15: 3-5 141. "Trail to Two Cities, A," Vinton Deming, 5/15: 2 142. "Turning Over a New Leaf," Vinton Deming, 111-15: 2 143. "Union Differentiates," John Yungblut, 10/ 15: 5-7 144. "United in Joy," Louisa R. Alger, 9/1-15: 6-8 145. "Vietnam Veterans Memorial Stamp, The," Hi Doty, 3/ 1: 16-17 146. "Vigorous Journalistic Expression, A," Vinton Deming, 7/ 1-15: 3 147. "Visiting Soviet Christians," Dorothy Darling, 2/1: 14-15 148. "War Against Deterrence, The," William E. Johnston, Jr., 511: 7-10 149. "Welcome!" John F. Gummere, 4/15: 12 150. "What Canst Thou Say?" Richard S. Bear, 3/ I: 4-5 151. " What Don't We See?" Marguerite Clark, 9/1-15: 3-4 156. "Why Revive the Japanese-American Wartime Cases?" Gordon 152. "What Is the Question: An Easter Meditation," Thomas H. Hirabayashi, 8/1-15: 4-6 Jeavons, 4/1: 4-5 157. " Winston," Lucy Aron, 12/1: 13-14 153. "What It Took to Start Friends Journal," Carol P. Brainerd, 158. "Worship Sharing: A Way to Deepen Communion With Friends 7/1-15: 4 and With God," Renee C. Crauder, 12/1: 3 154. "What Price Witness?" Ted Hoare, 111 -15: 16 159. "Yahweh's Sex-Pepper Tree," Moses Bailey, 2/15: 14 155. "Why Don't You Sit Down?" Margaret Haworth Wright, 160. "Yield and Overcome," Jill Penberthy, 3/ 1: 11 2115: 10-12 161. "Your Coming and Your Going," Ray Gabbertas, 5/ 1: 3

North Carolina YM (Cons.), Damon D. Hickey, Ashford, Oliver M., Prophet or Professor? The 10/ 15: 21-22 Life and Work of Lewis Fry Richardson, 11 / 15: Reports Pacific YM, Keith Wedmore, 1111: 16 24 (Kenneth E. Boulding) Philadelphia YM, Martha G. Smith, 6/1-15: 16-17 Barker, Rodney, The Hiroshima Maidens, 11 / 15: 22-23 (Ruth Geibel Kilpack) Friends Consultation: Spiritual Authority and Quarterly Meeting Group Visits the Soviet Union, Accountability, David Bills and Diana Dille, Shirley Dodson, 12/15: 23 Bowman, David (see Shivers, Lynne) 4/ 1: 18-19 South Central YM, Yvonne Boeger, 5/15: 16 Boyer, Ernest, Jr., A Way in the World: Family FGC Gathering 1985, Vinton Deming, 9/1-15: 14 Southeastern YM, Mary Dee, 8/1-15: 17 Life as Spiritual Discipline, 6/ 1-15: 20 (Brad FWCC Annual Meeting, Sharli Powers Land, Sheeks) Southern Africa OM, Jane Zietlow, 411: 19 5115: 16 Brown, Robert McAfee, Unexpected News: Read­ FWCC 16th Triennial, Roger Naumann, 11115: Sweden YM, Ingmar HoUsing, 9/1-15: 16 ing the Bible With Third World Eyes, lOl l: 21 27-29 Switzerland YM, Robert J. Leach, 8/1-15: 17 (Renee C. Crauder) Illinois YM, Lewis Walton, 10/ 15: 20-21 Western YM, Elizabeth A. Garter, 1111:17 Caldicott, Helen, Missile Envy: The Arms Race and Nuclear War, 5/ 1: 23 (Lenna Mae Gara) Indiana YM, Marie McCracken, 12/ 1: 18 Wilmington YM, Sharon Trivett, 10/ 15: 21 Clubb, Oliver, KAL Flight 007: The Hidden Story, World Gathering of Young Friends, Jonathan Intermountain YM, Mary Lou Coppock, 10/1: 15 12/1: 21-22 (Paul W. Rea) Vogel, 11 / 15: 26-27 Iowa YM (Cons.), Deborah Fink, 11 /15: 30 DuBois, Rachel Davis, All This and Something Lake Erie YM, Thomas F. Taylor, 10/1 5: 20 More: Pioneering in Intercultural Education, London YM, Irene Tester, 9/ 1-15: 15-/6 11/ 15: 20-22 (Karen L. Cadbury) Nebraska YM , Hannah J. Roberts, 811-15: 16-17 Book Reviews Dyson, Freeman, Weapons and Hope, 511: 21-23 (Stephen P. Dunn) New York YM, Steven W. Ross, 1111: 16-17 Aharoni, Ada, and Thea Wolf, Thea: To Alex­ andria, Jerusalem and Freedom, 3/ 1: 23 Ham, Sok Hon, Queen of Suffering: A Spiritual New Zealand Friends Peace Committee, Bill Car- History ofKorea, 11115:25 (C. Lloyd Bailey) ter, 6/ 1-15: 16 (W. D. Ehrhart) Hayes, John P ., James A. Michener: A Biography, New Zealand YM, Olwen Palmer, 9/ 1-15: 15 American Friends Service Committee, San Fran­ cisco, Joan Boder, ed., Taking Charge of Our 11115: 23 (Leonard S. Kenworthy) North Carolina YM, Barbara Davis Howard, Lives: Living Responsibly in the World, 3/ 15: Henry, Marie, The Secret Life of Hannah Whit all 11115: 29-30 25 (Helen Zimmermann) Smith, 10115: 26 (Margaret Hope Bacon)

FRIENDS JouRNAL February 15, 1986 37 Hilty, Hiram H., Toward Freedom for All: North Good, Phyllis Pellman, and Rachel Thomas Pell­ Carolina Quakers and Slavery, 12/1: 22 (Larry man, From Amish and Mennonite Kitchens, Ingle) Books in Brief 5/ 1: 24 (Susan Hardee Norris) Hinshaw, Seth B., The Carolina Quaker Exper­ Gutierrez, Gustavo, We Drink From Our Own ience, 1665- 1985: An Interpretation, 6/1-15:21 Alexander, Howard, ed., with Wilmer A. Cooper Wells, 10/ 15: 27 (Renee C. Crauder) (Damon D. Hickey) and James Newby, Practical Spirituality: Hartman, Robert H., ed., Poverty and Economic Huuerian Society of Brothers and John Howard Selected Writings ofFrancis B. Hall, 11/15:25 Justice, 5/ 15: 26 (Walter Bethel) Yoder, God's Revolution: The Witness ofEber ­ (Renee C. Crauder) Heine, Jorge, and Juan M. Garcia-Passalacqua, hard Arnold, 2/ 1: 22 (Howard Alexander) Allman, T. D., Unmanifest Destiny, 411: 25 The Puerto Rican Question, 111-15:22 (Walter Kozol, Jonathan, Illiterate America, 10/15: 26-27 (Ed McCaleb) Bethel) (Marjorie E. Peary) Asher, Marty, Fifty-Seven Reasons Not to Have Huddle, Norie, Surviving: The Best Game on Marietta, Jack D., The Reformation of American a Nuclear War, 10/ 1: 24 (Eve Homan) Earth, 3/ 15: 26 (Walter Bethel) Quakerism, 1748- 1783, 2115: 25 (Larry Ingle) Bacon, Margaret Hope, The Quiet Rebels, Ill!: Jewell, Robert, The Captain America Complex, Marty, Martin E., Pilgrims in Their Own Land, 24 (Eve Homan) 10/ 1: 24 (Walter Bethel) 4/ I: 22 (Lloyd Lee Wilson) Baker, Leon (see Fate, Nancy) Johnston, William, Christian Mysticism Today, Meltzer, Milton, Ain't Gonna Study War No Bonner, Raymond, Weakness and Deceit: U.S. 1/1-15: 22 (Walter Bethel) More, 12115: 26 (Joan Broadfield) Policy and El Salvador, 2115: 25 (Ed McCaleb) Kirby, M. W., Men of Business and Politics: The Meyerding, Jane, ed., We Are All Part of One Bradley, David, No Place to Hide, 19461/984, 511: Rise and Fall of the Quaker Pease Dynasty of Another: A Barbara Deming Reader, 11 / 15: 24 (Ed McCaleb) North-East England, 1700-1943, 5/ 15: 26 (Walter Bethel) 21-22 (Margaret Hope Bacon) Brockman, James R., ed., The Church Is All of Moore, Howard W., Plowing My Own Furrow, You: Thoughts of Archbishop Oscar Romero, Kohler, Charles, Grampa Tell Us a Story, 3/ 15: 11 / 15: 23-24 (Jonas Mather) 4/ 15: 36 (Walter Bethel) 26 (Renee C. Crauder) Morgan, Robin, ed., Sisterhood Is Global: The Budiardjo, Carmel, and Liem Soei Liong, The Kotre, John, Outliving the Self, 10/ 15: 27 (Ed International Women's Movement Anthology, War Against East Timor, 10/ 15: 27 (Ed McCaleb) 6/1-15: 20-21 (Jenny Beer) McCaleb) Liong, Liem Soei (see Budiardjo, Carmel) Nagi, Takashi, The Bells of Nagasaki, translated Carlin, Vivian F., and Ruth Mansberg, If I Live McGann, Diarmuid, The Journeying Self, 10/ 15: by William Johnston, 10/ 1: 21-23 (Lynne to Be 100 ... Congregate Housing for Later 27 (Ed McCaleb) Life, 12115: 28 (Renee C. Crauder) Shivers) MacPherson, Myra, Long Time Passing: Vietnam Pinkney, Alphonso, The Myth ofBlack Progress, Carroll, Kenneth L., Three Hundred Years and and the Haunted Generation, 5/ 1: 24 (Susan 5/15: 25 (James A. Fletcher) More of Third Haven Quakerism, 3/ 15: 26 Hardee Norris) (Renee C. Crauder) Punshon, John, Portrait in Grey: A Short History Maharidge, Dale, Journey to Nowhere: The Saga ofthe Quakers, 41 I: 22-23 (Edwin B. Bronner) Cooper, Wilmer A. (see Alexander, Howard) ofthe New Underclass, 12115: 28 (Ed McCaleb) Roberts, Nancy L., Dorothy Day and the Catholic Crankshaw, Edward, Putting Up With the Rus­ Manning, Doug, Comforting Those Who Grieve, Worker, 5/ 15: 25-26 (Ruth Geibel Kilpack) sians, 511: 24 (Ed McCaleb) II/I: 24 (Karin Spiegler) Sanford, John A., ed., Fritz Kunkel: Selected Cummings, Stephen, and Dana Ullman, Every­ Mansberg, Ruth (see Carlin, Vivian F.) body's Guide to Homeopathic Medicines, 5/ 15: Writings, 1211: 22 (Marilyn Dyer) Marsh, Michael, A Matter of Personal Survival: Scattergood, Elizabeth McLeod, Meditations: 26 (Walter Bethel) Life After Death, 11/15: 25 (Renee C. Crauder) Dadd, Debra Lynn, Nontoxic and Natural, 6/ 1-15: Selections From a Century of Mottoes, 12/ 15: Mertz, Herbert, Jr., Peace and Affluence Through 21-22 (Walter Bethel) 26 (Leonard S. Kenworthy) the Multinational Corporations, 6/ 1-15: 22 Schell, Jonathan, The Abolition, 111-15 : 22 (Bruce Davis, Alison, A Sense of Wonder: A Spiritual (Walter Bethel) Guidebook, 41 I: 25 (Renee C. Crauder) Birchard) Montgomery, Herb, and Mary Montgomery, The Shivers, Lynne, and David Bowman, More Than Didsbury, Howard F., Jr., Creating a Global Christian Pattern Book: Dozens and Dozens of the Troubles: A Common Sense View of the Agenda, 5/ 15: 26 (Ed McCaleb) Creative Activities for Children, 1/1-15: 22 Northern Ireland Conflict, 2115: 25 (John Dilling, Yvonne, with Ingrid Rogers, In Search of (Walter Bethel) Lampen) Refuge, 3/15: 26 (Walter Bethel) Montgomery, Mary (see Montgomery, Herb) Steere, Douglas V., ed., The Classics of Western Dooling, D. M., ed., The Sons of the Wind, 4/ 15: Morgan, Arthur E., The Small Community, 4/ 15: Spirituality: Quaker Spirituality, Selected Writ­ 36 (Ed McCaleb) 36 (John Steitz) ings, 3/1: 23-24 (Patricia Waddell) Early, Richard E., Weavers and War: A True Munnik, Len, Nothing to Laugh About, 3/ 15:26 Tateishi, John, And Justice for All: An Oral His­ Story, 12115: 28 (Walter Bethel) (Ed McCaleb) . tory of the Japanese-American Internment Camps, 3/15: 24 (Fred W. Swan) Fate, Nancy, and Leon Baker, Forest ofAlgae and Newby, James (see Alexander, Howard) Ivy: Outside/ In, 121 15: 28 (Ed McCaleb) Taylor, Marvin J ., ed., Changing Patterns ofRe­ Newlin, Algie 1., Friends "at the Spring": A His­ ligious Education, 9/ 1-15: 22 (Cindy Taylor) Fernea, Elizabeth Warnock, and Robert A. Fer­ tory of Spring Monthly Meeting, 5/ 1: 24 (Ed nea, The Arab World: Personal Encounters McCaleb) Tomes, Nancy, A Generous Confidence: Thomas 12115: 28 (Renee C. Crauder) Story Kirkbride and the Art ofAsylum-keeping, Nowakowski, Marek, The Canary and Other Tales 1840-/883, 3/ 1: 24-25 (Samuel B. Burgess) Fernea, Robert A. (see Fernea, Elizabeth) of Martial Law, 4/ 1: 25 (Ed McCaleb) Torjesen, Elizabeth Fraser, Comet Over Nan­ Foreign Policy Association, eds., Foreign Policy Pellman, Rachel Thomas (see Good, Phyllis tucket: Maria Mitchell and Her Island, 12115: Choices for Americans, 4/15: 36(Ed McCaleb) Pellman) 26 (Kate de Riel) Galtung, Johan, There Are Alternatives: Four Revel, Jean-Francois, How Democracies Perish, Willens, Harold, The Trim tab Factor, 3/ 15:24-25 Roads to Peace and Security, 1011 : 24 (Ed 10/ 1: 24 (Ed McCaleb) McCaleb) (Robert Schutz) Richards, Jerrold, Nuclear War and You: Before, Wolf, Thea (see Aharoni, Ada) Garcia-Passalacqua, Juan M. (see Heine, Jorge) During, After, 1/1-15: 22 (Walter Bethel) Wyden, Peter, Day One: Before Hiroshima and Gardella, Peter, Innocent Ecstacy, 11/15:25 (Eve Rogers, Ingrid (see Dilling, Yvonne) After, 2/ 1: 22 (Jhan Robbins) Homan) Shibley, David, and Naomi Shibley, More Special Yoder, John Howard (see Hutterian Society) Good, Merle, Who Are the Amish?, 11/1 : 24 Times With God, 4/ 15: 36 (Ed McCaleb) (Karin Spiegler)

38 February 15, 1986 FRIENDS JouRNAL Shibley, Naomi (see Shibley, David) Reynolds, Kay, "I Hear You," 4/ 1: 17 Interconnections, Elaine Prevallet, 10/ 1: 23 Simon, Arthur, Bread for the World, 12115: 28 Sarton, May, "The Great Transparencies," Introducing Elias Hicks, Norma Jacob, 5115 : 24 (Renee C. Crauder) 7/1-15: 6 Jesus, Jefferson, and the Task ofFriends , Newton Smedes, Lewis B., Forgive and Forget: Healing Smith, Charlotte Mcgurty, " Woodthrush," 311: Garver, 10/ 1: 22 the Hurts We Don't Deserve, 411: 25 (Renee 15 C. Crauder) Larzac-A Victory for Nonviolence, Roger Raw­ Stetser, Virginia, "Breaking the Dune Barrier," linson, 51 15: 24 Spohn, William C., What Are They Saying About 10115: 4 Scriptures and Ethics?, 5115: 26 (Walter Bethel) The Light Within and Selected Writings of Issac Stevens, David A., "haiku" and "senryu," Penington, Tract Association of Friends, 5/ IS: Swomley, John M., The Politics of Liberation, 111-15: 8 24 12/ 15: 28 Swaim, Alice MacKenzie, " Hospital Gift," 5/ 1: The Lome Agreement: Europe and the Third Totten, Martha Wescoat (see Totten, Sam) 5; " Sun on Bleak Water," 12115: 17 World, Quaker Council for European Affairs, 12/ 15: 27 Totten, Sam, and Martha Wescoat Totten, Facing Troy, Jack, "The Wind in the Jug: For the Aboli­ the Danger: Interviews With 20 Anti-Nuclear tionist Potters of Chester County, Penn­ The New Foundation Papers, 12115: 26 Activists, 611-15: 22 (John Steitz) sylvania," I 0/ I: 3 Nurturing Contemplation, Carol R. Murphy, Treben, Maria, Health Through God's Pharmacy, Tucker, Leigh, "Storm," 12/ 15: 17 10/ 1: 22 6/ 1-15: 22 (Ed McCaleb) Wallace, Terry S., "Coming of Age in Mount Hol­ One Explorer's Glossary of Quaker Terms, War­ Ullman, Dana, (see Cummings, Stephen) ly, New Jersey, 1741," 1211: 12 ren Sylvester Smith, 12/ 15: 26 Zuckerman, Edward, The Day After World War Werner, Elaine, "Christmas Query," 12/ 15: 5 Paying for Peace, Quaker Council for European Ill, 211: 22 (Ed McCaleb) Affairs, 12115: 27 Wheat, Maxwell Corydon, Jr., "Vietnam Veterans Memorial," 6/1-15: 5; "Carolina Wren," The Prophetic Stream, William Taber, 10/ 1: 23 12/ 15: 5 Sanctuary for Refugees From El Salvador and Poetry Wiltsey, Robert, " Who Gathers Honey for the Guatemala: Resource Guide for Friends, Hive," 5/ 15: 5 Friends Peace Committee of Philadelphia Yearly Meeting, 12/ 15: 26 Wohl, Jane Elkington, "Peace in November," Brandenburg, Kurt, "When I Was Five (August 12115: 5 The Seeker, Seekers Association, 5/ 15: 24 1945)," 8/ 1-15: 8 Yarnall, Naomi, " The Edge of Nothing," 5/15: Seekers Meetings, Adda Dilts, 5/ 15: 24 Brooks, Helen Morgan, " In Faith Believing," 2/ 1: 26-27 7 Servant of the Meeting, Cecil Sharman, 51 15: 24 Councilman, Emily Sargent, "Beyond the The Shackletons of Ballitore, Caroline Nicholson Dream," 12/15: 17 Jacob, 51 15: 24 Dimitrova, Blaga, "Cassandra With a Tail," The Spiritual Quest, Meg Chignell, 5/ 15: 24 translated by John Balaban, 5/1: 13 Friendly Words Stewardship of Wealth, Kingdon W. Swayne, Duryee, Samuel S., Jr., "For Anna Brinton," 10/ 1: 23 7/ 1-15: 19 All About Ourselves, Maggie Goodrich, 5/15: 24 Tempted By Happiness: Kazantzakis' Post­ Ehrhart, W. D. , "A Warning to My Students," Around Europe, Quaker Council for European Christian Christ, Peter A. Bien, 10/ 1: 22-23 1111: 11 Affairs, 5115: 24 Tending the Light, Mary E. B. Feagin, 10/ 1: 23 Endo, Russell Susumu, "Kite Flying With Artist on the Witness Stand, Fritz Eichenberg, There Is a Unity: Quaker Thoughts on Racial Father," 3/ 15 : 6-7 10/1: 23 Justice, Peggy Heeks and Martin Wyatt, eds., Forsythe, Helen G., "Untitled," 3/ 1: 14 Bridging the East-West Divide, Quaker Peace and 5/ 15: 24 Service, 5/ 15: 24 Fowler, Christopher B., "From Meeting," 4/ 1: 17 To Martin Luther King With Love: A Southern A Conversation With Henri Nouwen, Henri Quaker's Tribute, David W. Pitre, 10/1: 23 Goodridge, Thomas, "Soweto," 9/ 1-15: 4 Nouwen, 12/ 15: 27 The Two Cinnas: Quakerism, Revolution and Hancock, Marjorie, "May Morning at Woolman Daniel Wheeler: Quaker Adventures in Russia and Poetry; Laurence Lerner, 5/ 15: 24 Hill," 5/ 1: 5 in the South Seas in the Early Nineteenth The Way of the Cross, Mary C. Morrison, Heiman, Frances, "Candlefire Seen Through a Century, John Ormerod Greenwood, 5/ 15 : 24 10/ 1: 23 Honey Jar," 1/ 1-15: 9 Defense of the Peaceable Kingdom, Marshall When Silence Becomes Singing, Helen Kylin, Hickman, Mark Lee, " Winter Hymn," 2/ 1: 7 Massey, 12/ 15: 27 1011: 23 Howe, Evan, "Queen Hecuba of Chicago," The Desert and the Market Place, Jack Dobbs, Woodstown Friends Meeting: 1785-1985, 111-15: 9 5115: 24 12/ 15: 26 Hubben, Trudy B., "Grief," 211: 7 Directory for Traveling Friends, Gretchen Castle, You Are Your Brother's Keeper-The Divine Im­ Kirsch, S. Clair, "Aggression," 8/ 1-15: 9 ed., 12/ 15: 26 Perative, Simeon Shitemi, 12115: 27 Medvescek, Chris, "Rhythms Remembered," Facing Old Age With Courage, Ruth Fawell, 5/15: 4/ 15: 11 24 Michener, Jeannette S., "In Memoriam, Norman Friendly Business, Robert Schutz, 12115: 27 R. Morrison," 7/ 1-15: 13 Geraldine Cadbury 1865-1941: The Problem of Film and Play Morris, Laura Nell, " He is not here-He is risen," Deprived and Delinquent Children, Maggie 4/ 1: 6 Goodrich, 5/15: 24 Reviews Paxson, Katherine, "Communion in Meeting," Growing in the Light: Toward a Better Under­ The Killing Fields, 3/ 15: 22-23 (Larry Miller) 311 : 15 standing ofQuakerism Today, Religious Educa­ tion Committee of Philadelphia Yearly Meeting, Kiss of the Spider Woman, 1211 : 23 (Dennis Povolny, Joyce W., "Answer," 2/ 1: 4 12/ 15: 27 Hartzell) Randall, Judith, "Easter," 4/ 1: 6; "Searching," A History of Providence Meeting at Media, Penn­ The Sword of Peace, William Hardy, 8/ 1-15: 19 12/ 15: 16 sylvania, Ralph H. Pickett, 12/ 15: 27 (Robert Gwyn) Rawlins, Winifred, "This I Can Now Affirm," Holistic Economics and Social Protest, Jack Witness, 5115: 23 (Eve Homan) 7/ 1-15: 11 Powelson, 10/ 1: 22 Witness to War, lOl l: 20 (Phyllis B. Taylor)

FRIENDS JoURNAL February 15, 1986 39 Dear Friends: I welcome this opportunity on behalf of the Trustees of Medford Leas to share with readers of the Friends Journal some of the philosophy and practices of our continuing care corrnunity. Large organizations may unwittingly present barriers to individuals seeking information or attempting to assist others, and to the extent possible, we would like to remove those barriers . The staff of Medford Leas are available as a resource to offer suggestions and information to Friends and Friends Meetings who may have questions or concerns about Friends or relatives and friends of Friends who are aging or require care. You need not be inquiring about Medford Leas. Please do not hesitate to telephone or to arrange an appointment for a longer discussion. All too often Friends delay such discussions and then fewer options may be ~vailable. For Friends who are specifically interested in living at Medford Leas, financial assistance is available to those with limited funds. Confidentiality is always maintained so that the privacy of the resident receiving financial assistance is protected. The gift that all residents bring to Medford Leas is the gift of them­ selves. We are enriched by the diversity of our cofim.mity and the individual contributions of each resident. You may have a special situation that makes you wonder if you or your loved ones would be accepted by Medford Leas . Again, please contact us because alroost always we have been able to make adjustments for special needs. We have built a variety of living accommodations to provide options for residents. In addition to the 250 full service residential apartments, those options range from a secluded cottage overlooking the Rancocas Creek for those who want to live in a woodl and setting, to one and two bedroan apartments in Mt . Holly, New Jersey, on land adjacent to the Friends Meeting for residents who want to be an integral part of an active town. All residents have full medical and nursing coverage but may select acconmxiations with or without meals or housekeeping. The opportunity to move to a full service apartment at a later date is available to residents who initially elect to provide their own meals or housekeeping. Finally, we can occasionally offer a direct medical contract to individuals requiring nursing or personal care. We feel a particular commitment to people on the waiting list. Although the waiting time cannot be shortened, we can serve as a continuing resource,and outpatient medical care is available to prospective residents. Space is too short and words inadequate to fully discuss Medford Leas . We are here to serve you and to grow in understanding of how best to carry forward our mission.

Sincerely, ~~~ Tak l-briuchi