10 East Anglian Daily Times Saturday, December 19, 2009 www.eadt.co.uk Waking up THE Joy Martin without the of EssEx Newell Wogan wit Comment Joys of Christmas and Lynne Mortimer

NO longer will I Wake Up to Wogan. the rock and roll lifestyle The man with the vocal equivalent of a warming glass of Baileys will no longer “It’s a mighty long way down be gently stroking my aural sensors rock’n’roll” – Mott the Hoople with his velvet Irish brogue as I slither (1973) reluctantly from my bed to the shower uring the mid-1970s, Keith each weekday morning. Christmas’s dad owned an He is, of course, a National Treasure optician’s shop on North – an accolade most often granted to those Hill, opposite the present who have ceased to be, or who have never Sixth form College. Your been, sex kittens. Dyoung correspondent, at this time, While Sir Tel may dispute this, there is was working in the restaurant no doubt in my mind that he would not next door as a part-time scullion. have appreciated vast numbers nubile Whenever the outside drain young women throwing themselves at overflowed I would be sent out to him, offering him their bodies (check this, sluice the pavement down, while Ed). Mr Christmas Snr. stood over me But old broadcasters never disappear, growling about the mess. One they simply get shuffled off to Sunday day, he said to me: “I understand slots. And so it is with Sir Terry Wogan you sing in a pop group of some whose new show will go out on St sort?” I nodded. The optician told Valentine’s Day, Sunday February 14. me that he had a son, Keith, who Roses are red, violets are blue was in the business and perhaps I Terry is back… er, Terry who? might have heard of him? Oh yes, the public can be fickle – but I, I had indeed heard of him. for one, will wait for you, Terry. Like so many of our first wave For decades our Tel’s radio show has of popular musicians, acoustic enjoyed the highest ratings on British guitar legend, Keith Christmas radio but in a world where all good things grew up in an England left come to an end - unlike a lot of the bad threadbare by war. He was born ones - the day had to come when the alarm at Myrtle Villa, in Wivenhoe High went off and you woke up knowing it Street in the autumn of 1946. would never be Wogan again. He went to school at Wivenhoe I am already missing his self- Primary: “A dear old battleaxe deprecating humour, his mischievousness used to keep us in check. We used and that wheeze of a laugh that to run to the railings to see the occasionally renders him incapable of old steam trains go past from speech when one of his Togs (Terry’s old Brightlingsea – ‘Brittlesea’ as we geezers/gals or similar) makes a naughty used to say it. We’d play out on the but nice joke. Or those silent moments Rec all day ( the present King V LEGEND: , who had Keith Christmas fly out to New York to try out as electric guitarist on the 1974 during the reading of a Janet and John playing field) which seemed like Diamond Dogs tour. “Since I didn’t know one end of an electric guitar from the other, it was doomed, he said. story when he attempts to regain his a national park then but looks tiny composure. to me now. his solo albums In retrospect, it off for some vital royalties, was That said, there is still some He has described the J&Js as My mother – as they all did does sound extraordinary. Forty completely broke and could see no great music being written and “masterpieces of double entendre, and then – stayed at home, cleaned, years ago, though, in the more way out of it.“ he said produced. It just doesn’t have the disgusting in their own homespun way”. cooked, mended and fought battles egalitarian days of the rock “So I started labouring on backing of the mainstream music Wogan’s gift of the gab is reinforced with the greengrocer’s scales.” underground, it wasn’t an unusual building sites for £20 a day. I business.” by a quiet intelligence that shows no sign Keith attended Colchester Royal thing. retrained as a teacher after some Long resident in the West of diminishing. And you can’t help but Grammar School and briefly, Singer-songwriters such years – then I settled down in Country, Keith Christmas recently be impressed by a 71-year-old who knows played drums in a local pop group. as Keith Christmas, or his Bristol and it was there, in the visited his birthplace for the first what happened yesterday and remembers Being an excellent acoustic guitar contemporary, Al Stewart, 90s that I wrote and produced time in years. His recollections of the names of the people he is speaking to. player, however, he soon gravitated might have found anyone from the blues album Weatherman, an 1950s Wivenhoe are refreshingly He is an inspiration all of us who towards the folk scene. He pitched Led Zeppelin’s Jimmy Page instrumental CD, Acoustica and at odds with those who believe feverishly complete crosswords and up in London, in the late 1960s. It to Rod Stewart helping out on the solo CD Light of the Dawn.” that all change has been for the Sudoku in the hope of keep-ing our brains was good timing. recording sessions. He now recalls Currently working on a new CD, worse. alert. Keith Christmas featured on “There was a genuine family of Keith is circumspect, both about “I was very pleased to see all It would be good to think that it is the David Bowie’s debut album A musicians then – and given the the music industry and his own the new development down along frequent exercise of gentle irony that has Space Oddity: “I played acoustic precarious nature of the life of a career. “It has become a formulaic the waterside. keeps him in such fine mettle. guitar on his first album, as a musician or songwriter, it was a business whose only purpose is to “I always thought that it was This was nowhere more evident than result of being a regular guest great comfort and support.” churn out money-making dross. a depressing area with all those in his Eurovision commentary. While at his club ( Bowie’s now-famous Keith’s Bowie connection rotting buildings and wasted most of us would have been on the second Arts Lab) in Beckenham.” endured a while longer. “He also space. It’s so different from when I bottle of vodka and throwing things Keith also played the first-ever flew me to New York to try out was growing up there. at the presenters by the time the last in 1970. for electric guitarist on his 1974 “Then, it was a fishing and Balkan country had cast its top vote for During the early 1970s he toured Diamond Dogs tour but since I cargo port – and of course, a a neighbour, Wogan would utter a mild: with or supported , The didn’t know one end of an electric ship-building centre – more than “And there’s a surprise.” Kinks, , , guitar from the other, it was a little cut off from the world It Some might say he is the reason the UK Ten Years After, Frank Zappa and, doomed from the start. seemed a poor place then, with doesn’t take the song contest seriously unbelievably, Captain Beeheart. “I had a great time in New some very dour inhabitants. I and, if that’s the case, we have every When I badger him for stories, he York, though, and met lots of have no idea what they’d make reason to thank him. is frustratingly tactful: “Lots of fascinating people. I also did some of the waterfront tables and art So now my morning moves temporarily memories – many of which are jamming with him on a late-night galleries now.” from Irish cream to Scottish malt as entirely unprintable, for legal session in London in the late 70s, Keith Christmas, something of Johnny Walker caretake the morning reasons. Suffice it to say that what which is supposed to be part of an acoustic guitarist’s acoustic show until the new year when Chris I can remember of it all was a lot some legendary long-lost tape. guitarist, now rekindled his Evans moves in for good on January 11. of fun!” But MP3 samples I have been music career to a manageable Wogan is a tough act to follow but if Refer to Keith’s discography sent don’t ring any bells.” says a size, which, when you study the anyone can pull it off Evans can… ginger and you’ll find the likes of Cat bemused Keith. casualty list of the era which wine, anybody? Stevens, Rod Argent and half It wasn’t until the 1980s that spawned him, is quite a neat trick. [email protected] of King Crimson guesting on disaster struck. “I got ripped MUSICIAN: Keith Christmas