AFF Neoowslerrtte r ottf thhe Aeebra h aPmP Lieencoooln Appssoclliaeteion V ol ume 8, Numb er 4 Wi n ter 2006 Spr i n g f i el d, I l l i n oi s

The Other Side of Mary Part 1 By Jewett E. Ricker Jr.* which in many cases are entirely with - something about the stock from which t the very beginning I wish to out foundation, and in others are so she sprung. This is desirable because a make it clear that I feel it pre - distorted as to be almost criminally surprisingly large number of people A sumptuous of me to talk on libelous. Some of you may have read have the idea that Mrs. Lincoln was an the subject of Mary Lincoln. I certain - the article entitled “The Woman in uneducated social upstart. Nothing ly make no claims of being qualified to Lincoln’s Life” which was published in could be farther from the truth. It is do so. Indeed, there is only one thing the January issue of THE READERS doubtful if many persons of her period that impelled me to accept Mrs. Wil - DIGEST. This article is condensed possessed such sterling ancestry and helmi’s kind invitation. That was a from the larger work by Dale Carne - certainly few—if any—had such oppor - desire to set right—as far as it is possi - gies entitled, “Lincoln, the Un- tunities both from a social and educa - ble for me to do so—some of the erro - known.” This appraisal of Mrs. Lincoln tional standpoint. Moreover, certain neous ideas that are prevalent today in is so terribly unfair that I wish I had facts about her ancestry seem to make regard to the wife of . the time and the ability to take it up it easier to understand, if not excuse, Some historians have dealt very mali - item by item and refute—or at least some of the characteristics and eccen - ciously with the character, and particu - challenge—many of the statements it tricities which she developed in later larly with the eccentricities, of this lady contains. It is true that there is basis for life. who presided over the White House some of the charges, but, as a whole, it The family tree of Mary Todd Lin - during the most troublous period of is totally devoid of the sympathetic coln goes back to Scottish Covenanters our history. There had unquestionably understanding which any person must who, strong in their faith, stubbornly been some basis for the criticisms that have who attempts to deal fairly with fought the King and defied the estab - have been leveled at her, but—as is the trials and tribulations of Mary Lin - lished Church of . In the usually the case—the good qualities of coln. I hope, in the course of my famous clash at Bothwell Bridge, it will Mrs. Lincoln have been almost remarks, to disprove some of the state - be remembered that several hundred ignored. Fortunately in recent years ments made in this one-sided biogra - Covenanters were captured and some historians—such as Carl Sand - phy. deported to America. Two hundred of burg, William E. Barton and Dr. To my mind the laws of the Unit - these were shipwrecked off the William A. Evans—have taken the ed States should be strengthened to Orkneys. Two of those drowned were trouble to explore the facts concerning make it impossible for writers to hand of Fenwick and James Mrs. Lincoln and have brought forth down to posterity statements concern - Todd of Dunbar. This was in 1679. In some very excellent, and very fair biog - ing the lives, character and personality the same year, John Todd—their sur - raphies about her. It was my good for - of persons who have passed from this viving brother—fled from the persecu - tune to know Mr. Barton very well and earthly scene—unless such statements tions of Clavershouse in to to talk with both him and Dr. Evans are fully and completely supported by find refuge in the north of Ireland, about their findings. While they both documentary proof. We are entirely where he became a wealthy landowner. admitted her frailties and eccentricities, too free these days with our criticisms This John Todd and his wife had quite they both agreed that there were many of the great public characters of the a large family, and each of their sons fine points in her character and they past—and statements that would be and daughters had many children. One both expressed the opinion that few criminally libelous if uttered against of these was Robert Todd, who was women in history have been more living people are accepted and con - born in Ireland in 1697, and this mar - unjustly maligned. I feel it safe to say doned if uttered against those who riage, David and John. David, though that Mr. Sandburg also shares this cannot rise in defense of their own he came to America with his father and opinion. honor and reputation. mother, was born in Ireland and there The tragic fact remains that Mrs. In talking of Mrs. Lincoln, it is married Hannah Owen. Their third Lincoln is still the target of attacks probably well—first of all—to find out continued on page 3 2 For the People

Lincoln Never Said That By Thomas F. Schwartz 1861, as president-elect on his way to made a mistake, elect a better man next n e-mail query recently sent Washington, D.C. Lincoln told the time. There are plenty of them.” asked: “Is this quote from crowd: “By your Constitution you have A very popular attribution to A Lincoln: No President, by any another chance in four years. No great Abraham Lincoln is easily found on measure of incompetence or deceit, can harm can be done by us in that time— Internet sites as well as greeting cards: do great harm to the republic in the in that time there can be nobody hurt.” “And in the end, it’s not the years in short span of four years.” While Lin - Extolling the virtues of elections, Lin - your life that count. It’s the life in coln never said it in this way, he did coln saw in them the self-correcting your years.” It was even used in First convey the essential meaning in a brief mechanism for failed leadership. He Lady ’s remarks at the speech given to well wishers in went on to add: “If anything goes memorial service for Frankie Hewitt, Steubenville, Ohio, on February 14, wrong, however, and you find you have continued on page 8

New Members Cyndy Alaimo, Santa Fe, NM Fred & Sandra Groves, Normal, IL Robert Okun, West Suffield, CT John Allen, Springfield, IL Mr. & Mrs. William H. Gumprecht, Mr. & Mrs. Richard Owen, Harvey Alvy, Cheney, WA Wilmington, DE Bloomington, IL Edmund Ames, Beverly Hills, CA Bruce F. Hart, Streator, IL Richard E. Pearson, Galesburg, IL Anne Anderson, Villa Grove, IL Margaret M. Hastings, Samuel A. Perroni, Little Rock, AR Mr. & Mrs. David N. Barkhausen, Kenilworth, IL Kathleen L. Phoenix, Tulsa, OK Lake Bluff, IL David Hatton, Springfield, IL Robert W. Porter, Bloomington, IL Peter Barry, Champaign, IL Ramona E. Henderson, Scott Rager, Normal, IL Sandy Bellatti, Springfield, IL Bloomington, IL Elizabeth Renner, Springfield, IL Lawrence Bensky, Madison, WI Jon & Sandra Hockenyos, Amber Achilles Ritter, Chicago, IL Stephen Berry, Chapel Hill, NC Springfield, IL Carol A. Rose, Uniontown, OH Roger Billings, Cincinnati, OH Anita Hodge, Seymour, IL Joe Rubinfine, West Palm Beach, FL Darrel Bigham, Evansville, IN Catherine & John Huther, Stephen & Donna Sauer, Lincoln, IL Daniel H. Borinsky, Lake Ridge, VA Springfield, IL Henry J. Schmidt, Antioch, IL Hugh D. Boyle, Bensalem, PA Jeffery H. Johnson, Astoria, OR Tim Schweizer, Springfield, IL Kevin & Lisa Callis, Bloomington, IL Kevin Orlin Johnson, Dallas, TX Matthew C. Sherman, St. Louis, MO David Carroll, Tinley Park, IL Seth Kaller Inc., White Plains, NY John P. Shook, John Corey-Qua, Springfield, IL Elizabeth D. Kater, Peoria, IL Rancho Palos Verdes, CA Nancy Dahl, Minnetonka, MN John & Betty Kay, Jacksonville, IL Jim & Mary Anne Singleton, Wayne Drayer, Fairbury, IL David Keehn, Allentown, PA Springfield, IL Richard Dubberke, Chicago, IL Patrick W. Kelley, Springfield, IL Ralph Smykal, Wheaton, IL Bruce J. Einhorn, Canyon, CA Ronald G. Klein, DeKalb, IL Mrs. Dell Colby Souther, Tracy L. Elliott, Indianapolis, IN Sy Kushmar, Garden City, MI Springfield, IL John P. Elterich, Bloomington, IL Jules C. Ladenheim, Teaneck, NJ Thomas & Suzann Spada, Thomas W. Ewing, Pontiac, IL Ray LaHood, Peoria, IL Rochester, IL Mr. & Mrs. Richard Farmer, Fraser A. Lang, Block Island, RI Roland Spies, Bloomington, IL Deerfield, IL George J. Lincoln, Villanova, PA Edward Stamm, Lexington, KY Connor S. Feinour, Bear, DE Patrick McDaniel, Decatur, IL Richard Stewart, Chatham IL Julie M. Fenster, DeWitt, NY McLean County Museum of History, Mark Swerdlik, Normal, IL Kevin Finger, Chicago, IL Bloomington, IL Darlyn Thomas, Madison, WI William A. Finke, Milwaukee, WI Madison County Historical Society, Shawn Thomas, Bay Shore, NY Rolland G. Fitch II, Summerville, SC Edwardsville, IL Eva Gaither Thornberry, Carol J. Fox, Bloomington, IL Tracy Meyer, Chatham, IL Louisville, KY Friends of , Inc., Bill Moorehead, Mt. Auburn, IL W. Whalen, Chicago, IL Manchester Center, VT Donald Motier, Harrisburg, PA Jeffrey D. Wohl, Hillsborough, CA Jack Gaffigan, Lakewood, CO Stephen Mudge, Edwardsville, IL Jeanne Koring Wroan, John R. Gehlbach, Elkhart, IL Jeff Mueller, Springfield, IL Bloomington, IL Francis X. Golniewicz, Chicago, IL William D. Mulliken, Chicago, IL Christopher Young, Donald R. Graham, Springfield, IL George E. Myers, Springfield, IL Crown Point, IN For the People 3

THE ABRAHAM LINCOLN ASSOCIATION RICHARD E. H ART The Other Side of Mary Lincoln President P ar t 1 BARBARA HUGHETT ROBERT J. L ENZ continued from page 1 were cultured, ROBERT WILLARD son, , married Jean Briggs. refined, able men and women. In fact, Vice-Presidents They also had a large family. Their sev - they were unusually successful—out - THOMAS F. S CHWARTZ enth child, , mar - standing leaders of their day. James Secretary ried Eliza Ann Parker. Eliza Parker was Henthorn Todd was one of the great ROBERT A. S TUART JR. Treasurer seventeen years old, and a daughter of Irish scholars of this day. Henry John ROGER D. B RIDGES Major Robert Parker, a Revolutionary Todd edited Johnson’s Dictionary, the Immediate Past-President War officer. She was a first cousin of authority of its time. Robert Bentley MARY SHEPHERD Levi Todd, and therefore the second Todd was a physician of great Executive Assistant cousin of her own husband, Robert renown—the Charles Mayo of his day. Board of Directors Smith Todd. To this union seven chil - His statue may be seen today at King’s Kenneth L. Anderson Molly M. Becker dren were born. The fourth of these College Hospital. David Todd won Michael Burlingame was Mary Ann Todd, who became the world-wide fame as an astronomer. Brooks Davis wife of Abraham Lincoln. The seventh, The “Mary” of Cooleridge’s verse was Rodney O. Davis Robert S. Eckley a baby brother of Mary Todd, was Mary Evans Todd. Among the Pilgrim Allen C. Guelzo born on July 4, 1825, but the mother Fathers from Yorkshire was Christo - Kathryn M. Harris did not live to see him. Thus, in the pher Todd. He was one of the Earl W. Henderson Jr. Fred B. Hoffmann loss of her young, 31-year old moth - founders of New Haven, and Yale Col - David Joens er—Mary Ann Todd, who was then lege—its entire campus—was original - Ron J. Keller seven years of age, met the first great ly a part of his estate. Sarah Todd was Lee McTurnan Richard W. Maroc tragedy of her life. Later her father the wife of the original John Jacob Myron Marty remarried. His second marriage was to Astor. Eben, Thomas and George Richard Mills a very estimable lady, Elizabeth Todd were all ranking officers in the Susan Mogerman Georgia Northrup Humphreys of Staunton, Virginia, American army under Washington. Phillip S. Paludan but—as is so often the case—the fami - Timothy Todd was a member of the James W. Patton III ly of the first Mrs. Todd was never rec - Revolutionary Council. David Todd Mark Plummer Marvin Sanderman onciled to this marriage. Meanwhile, was one of the first governors of Ohio. William G. Shepherd Ann Maria Todd—younger sister of John Todd helped found Mt. Holyoke Brooks D. Simpson Robert S. Todd—had come to take Seminary. Daniel W. Stowell Nicky Stratton care of Mary and her five brothers and And so it goes—Mary Todd’s Louise Taper sisters. great-grandfather on her mother’s side Donald R. Tracy Now, in passing, please note that was General Andrew Porter, close Andy Van Meter Margaret Van Meter Mary Todd’s mother and father had friend of Washington. An uncle was Daniel R. Weinberg the same great-grandfather, Robert governor of Pennsylvania. Her uncle— Stewart L. Winger Smith Todd. Also that on both her John Todd—became so distinguished Kenneth J. Winkle paternal and maternal side there were as a Presbyterian minister that he is Honorary Directors Governor Rod R. Blagojevich exceedingly large families nearly all of regarded as one of the pillars of this Senator Richard Durbin the Todds and Parkers having from church in America; he was founder of Senator Barack Obama seven to twelve children. These facts, it . John Congressman Ray LaHood Congressman John Shimkus seems to me, have never been given Todd, another uncle, was appointed by Justice Rita Garman sufficient attention by historians, but— Patrick Henry to be the first civil gov - Mayor Timothy J. Davlin in considering the mental make-up of ernor of what is now our own state— Emeritus Directors Mary Todd Lincoln—I feel sure they . His son—another Col. Cullom Davis John J. Trutter would be given very great weight by Todd—was appointed by Thomas Jef - Harlington Wood Jr. the eugenists and psychiatrists of today. ferson, then governor of Virginia, as Distinguished Directors The ancestry and family connec - colonel of Fayette County, — Mario M. Cuomo tions of Mary Todd Lincoln are so his lieutenant colonel being Daniel David Herbert Donald John Hope Franklin interesting and important that I wish it Boone. Throughout the pages of early Harry V. Jaffa were possible to dwell upon them at American history—to say nothing of Robert W. Johannsen greater length. However, about all that the history of Scotland and Ireland— Garry Wills can be said in a brief talk is that nearly you will find written in large letters the all of the ancestors and relatives of continued on page 4 4 For the People

The Other Side of Mary Lincoln P ar t 1

continued from page 3 She was so persuasive that the butler mother, she was, of course, under the names of the ancestors and relatives of finally told the great statesman that jurisdiction of her father’s second wife, Mary Ann Todd. They were nearly all Mary Todd was outside and insisted on Elizabeth Humphreys Todd. Her step- leaders in their fields of activity. More seeing him. mother was, on the whole, good to important still, they were all patriots. Mr. Clay came out, bringing his Mary and her sisters, but Mary was so Practically every male member of the friends with him. Mary, delighted, put much in the company of the Parkers— Todd, Porter and Parker families the pony through its paces—and, the parents of her own mother—that fought in the Revolutionary War and always an expert in such matters, she her mind was probably poisoned some - the . Many of them gave and the pony put on such a creditable what against her step-mother. While their lives for their country. show that Mr. Clay insisted she remain they never had any serious clashes, It was the blood of these early for dinner. there seems to be little doubt that patriots—these American leaders—that At the table—during a lull in the Mary and her step-mother failed to see flowed through the veins of Mary Ann conversation—Mary exclaimed sud - eye-to-eye on many subjects. Todd. By the time she was born, denly: “Mr. Clay, my father says you However, Mary had great admira - , 1818, nearly all of the will be the next President of the Unit - tion for her new grandmother—Mrs. Todd family had emigrated to Ameri - ed States. I wish I could go to Wash - Mary Humphreys, at whose home, in ca. Her father and mother were living ington and live in the White House. I Frankfort, she often visited. The elder in a great, spacious home in Lexing - begged my father to be President but Mrs. Humphreys, while not an aboli - ton, Kentucky—a home that had been he only laughed and said be would tionist, had decided views on slavery. built by Mr. Todd next to the house of rather see you there than be President She owned eight slaves, and in her will his wife’s parent’s Major and Mrs. himself. My father is a very peculiar granted to all of them. She Robert Parker. Not far off—on the man, Mr. Clay. I don’t think he really was in many ways a remarkable Richmond Pike—was the ample estate wants to be President.” There was so woman—a free thinker, a prodigious of Mary Ann’s grandparents—General much disappointment in her voice, reader of Voltaire and Volney. Mary and Mrs. Levi Todd. This estate, that Mr. Clay said, reassuringly: “Well, once witnessed her grandmother known as “Ellersly,” was one of the Mary, if I am ever President of the Humphreys, who was 73, lead a grand showplaces of Lexington, and was the United States I shall expect you to be march at Franklin. She was so dig - birthplace of Mary’s father. one of my first guests. Will you come?” nified, so regal, that Mary afterwards Close to “Ellersly” was the “Helm Mary’s face lighted up with enthu - said: “If I can only be, when I am Place”—the beautiful, rolling estate of siasm. “Yes, I will. If you were not grown up, just like Grandmother Mary Ann’s older sister—Emilie Todd, already married, I would wait for you.” Humphreys, I will be perfectly satisfied who became Mrs. Ben Hardin Helm. This anecdote was always one of with myself.” And—in dress and Nearby, also was the ivy-covered man - ’s favorite stories. I relate it deportment—she was, as all historians sion, and it was a mansion, of Henry just to show how such an innocent seem to agree. Clay. childhood story can be twisted into a At fourteen Mary Todd—she had Mary Ann Todd early in girlhood malicious yarn by a modern “de- dropped her middle name “Ann”— formed a great liking for Henry Clay. bunker” of history. For, oddly enough, entered the boarding school of He was her councellor and friend, and this simple incident is the basis for the Madame Victorie Charlotte LeClere she his. One day, having been given a fabulous take that from girlhood Mary Mentelle, which was located just out - new white pony, she galloped over to Todd had possessed an almost insane side of Lexington. Madame Mentell “Ashland” to show her new pet to Mr. ambition to someday live in the White was a scholar, musician, dancer, and Clay. The butler told Mary that Mr. House and that it was to gratify this stylist. Her husband had been “His - Clay was very busy—that he was desire that she later laid siege to the tographer” to the King of France, entertaining five or six important offi - heart of Abraham Lincoln. but—following the French Revolu - cials. As a girl in Lexington, Kentucky, tion—the Mentelles had fled to Amer - Mary, however, would not be Mary Todd was high-spirited, impetu - ica, and Madame Mentelle had opened denied. She insisted on seeing Mr. ous, high strung. She was often very her famous school. Clay. She informed the butler that she willful, but all unbiased accounts of her The Mentelle school was entirely had ridden over especially to show her childhood state that she was well liked aristocratic in tone. Its proprietors friend the new pony and that she was and unusually popular. Her sisters lived on memories of King Louis XVI certain Mr. Clay would gladly excuse claim that she was somewhat of a tom- and Queen Marie Antoinette, and the himself from his gentlemen friends. boy. After the tragic death of her atmosphere of the school was that of For the People 5 the royal court of France. It was here tle education he had, and whose out - was always comparing Lincoln to that Mary became such an expert look on life was anything but cheerful Henry Clay—and Mary fairly idolized dancer and gained her love for exqui - and optimistic—a young, flaming fire her old neighbor, Henry Clay—it was site clothes and jewelry—a fad that about to encounter a pile of smolder - natural that she was pretty much pre - cost her dearly in later years. ing ashes! pared to admire Lincoln even before Madame Mentelle taught class, For many years the siren voice of she met him. breeding and manners from the stand - the rich prairie state of Illinois had Against the admiration of Stuart, point of feudal Europe, and her own been calling out to the sons and Mary heard other folks telling of Lin - objective was to bring up ladies of daughters of Kentucky. Indeed, there coln’s plainness—his sadness—his charm, culture and accomplishments. had been such an exodus from the blue moodiness—his uncouthness. She In this she had good raw material in grass region that—by 1836—Illinois heard others telling of his homely elo - Mary Todd, who became her most was two-thirds composed of Kentuck - quence; of his ability as a story-teller. brilliant pupil—an expert dancer, and, ians. Two of the Todd sisters, Eliza - Probably the thing that interested her as Madame Mentelle later said: “The beth and Frances, had settled in most were the reports of his shyness. star actress of the school,” for Mary Springfield. Elizabeth, at sixteen, had In any event, it is doubtful if any young took the leading part in most of the married Ninian W. Edwards, and lady was ever more curious to meet a school plays. Frances, at a somewhat older age, had young gentleman than Mary Todd was One of her fellow students at the married William Wallace, one of the to meet Abraham Lincoln. Mentelle school described Mary Todd leading physicians and druggists of the But, during the three months she in these words: “She was a merry, com - town. visited her sister, Mary Todd failed to panionable girl with a smile for every - So, at twenty-one, it was only nat - meet Abraham Lincoln. When he was - body. She was really the life of the ural that Mary Todd should accept the n’t away making speeches or trying law school, always ready for a good time. invitation of her sisters to come to the cases, he was too tired to go to social She was also one of the brightest girls thriving, bustling city where they had gatherings. However, it was not long in the school, always had the highest found such pleasure and happiness. after Mary had returned to Lexington marks and took the biggest prizes.” Almost instantly—living with her sis - before she was besieged with letters After she had completed her edu - ter, Mrs. Edwards—she became one of from her sisters and others urging her cation at the Mentelle school, Mary the “belles” of the town. Her sister return. She had—they told her—made Todd entered actively into the social describes her appearance at this time in a place from herself in Springfield; life of Lexington, and became one of these words: “Mary, although not everybody wanted her to come back. the most popular young ladies in that strictly beautiful, was more than pretty. Some historians claim—probably to be part of Kentucky. We can best appraise She had clear blue eyes, long lashes, sensational—that Mary had quarreled the Mary Todd of that day by quoting light brown hair with a glint of bronze, with her step-mother and was desirous from two sources. The first as Mrs. and a lovely complexion. Her figure of leaving home anyway, but the more Margaret Stuart Woodrow, one of her was beautiful and no Old Master could careful biographers have been unable intimate friends, who wrote: “Mary have modeled a more perfect arm and to find any such reason for her return Todd was very highly strung, nervous, hand.” to Illinois. impulsive, excitable, having an emo - The male viewpoint was probably In any case, gaining the consent of tional temperament much like an April best expressed by Mr. Edwards, who her parents, Mary Todd returned to day, sunning up all over with laughter once said of her: “Mary could make a Springfield in 1839—this time for the one moment, the next crying as bishop forget his prayers.” purpose of making an even more though her heart would break.” In any event, Mary had not been extended visit at the home of her sister, William H. Townsend, a Lexing - long in Springfield when she began to Mrs. Edwards. ton man who devoted many years to hear of the town’s rising young lawyer Soon after her arrival, Mary made searching all existing records and inter - and politician—Abraham Lincoln. her appearance at a cotillion. She was, viewing scores of people concerning John Todd Stuart, her first cousin, was as we have explained, an exceptionally this period in the life of Mary Todd living in Springfield, and it was he who graceful and expert dancer and was says this: “Brilliant, vivacious, impul - had persuaded Lincoln to study law. soon surrounded by young men beg - sive, Mary Todd possessed a charming They had lodged at the same house, ging for dances. personality marred only by a caustic, even occupied the same bed, had It was during one of these dances devastating wit that cut like the sting served in the Black Hawk War togeth - that she saw—for the first time—a tall, of a hornet.” er, and—just before Mary Todd came spare but powerfully built man in con - There you have the Mary Todd to Springfield—Stuart had formed a versation with her cousin, John Todd who was soon to enter the life of a law partnership with his protegee, Lin - Stuart. She had guessed at once that he young man who had been sobered by coln. Mary had been hearing many sto - must be the much-discussed Abraham misfortune and tragedy—a man of the ries of the charm and ability of his law Lincoln. plains who had given himself what lit - partner from her uncle. And, as Stuart continued on page 6 6 For the People

The Other Side of Mary Lincoln P ar t 1

continued from page 57 about the desirability of marriage; in turned abruptly and left the house. Naturally, girl fashion, Miss Todd one she asks the question, “Why is it Later he went back to the Edwards contrived to have her partner lead her that married folks always become so home sought out Mary—and told her by the place where her cousin and Lin - serious?” that, as she had made her choice, he coln were standing, and naturally, too, Lincoln, on his side, was far from intended to release her from her she made certain that she did her fan - happy. He, too, was anything but cer - engagement. Mary was furious, and ciest steps under his gaze. Hardly had tain that he and Mary would be con - stamping her foot, ordered him to the music stopped before her cousin genial. leave and “never, never, come back brought Mr. Lincoln across the floor In a letter to her friend, Mercy again.” to meet her. After being presented he Levering, Mary Todd tells of her own There you have the two diametri - said: imperfections and shortcomings. Of a cally opposite versions of this affair. “Miss Todd, I am very anxious to sudden she seemed to have acquired an The first, the story about the wedding dance with you.” Miss Todd accepted inferiority complex. Lincoln, during that did not take place, originated with but he danced so badly that her pro - the same period, was equally afraid. Herndon, Lincoln’s law partner, and gram was “filled”—for him—during Finally, on January 1, 1841, there has been repeated and embellished by the remainder of the evening. But this came the break-up of their engage - later historians. In fairness to Mrs. Lin - fact only made Mr. Lincoln the more ment. coln, it should be borne in mind that anxious to know her better. So, before Historians differ on what Herndon loathed her and that many of they left the hall, he asked if he might occurred. Dale Carnegie, in The Read - his stories have since been proved to be call the following evening. She said she ers Digest article, tells graphically how without any foundation whatever. would be delighted to receive him. this date had been set apart for the Careful historians have been unable to For two years after this, Mary wedding, how the guests were all find the slightest proof that Lincoln Todd haunted Lincoln. They quarreled assembled for the ceremony, and how ever failed to show up at any wedding and made up. They clashed bitterly, Mr. Lincoln failed to put in an appear - alleged to have been arranged prior to savagely, and then smoothed things ance—of how Abraham Lincoln literal - the time-—early two years later—that over. He told himself time after time ly left his bride-to-be waiting at the they were actually married. that he and Mary Todd were absolute - church. It is a graphic, picturesque A third version, and probably the ly unsuited to each other. She told her - story, as this historian, and a few others correct one, is that Lincoln did self the same thing. Yet, somehow, tell it. endeavor to break his engagement to they couldn’t give each other up. Dur - The other version—the version of Miss Todd on this memorable first of ing this period Lincoln was racked with the Todd family—is entirely different. January, 1841, that she broke down misgivings. He became a victim of Their story is that on this same day and cried, that he took her in his arms, hypochondriasis, and was under treat - there was a big family gathering at the ment of two or three physicians. At Edwards home; that Lincoln was sup - times it seemed as though his career posed to call for Mary and take her to was over; that his life was broken. a New Year’s party; that—being in one Never before had Abraham Lincoln of his brooding moods—he had pulled For the People (ISSN 1527–2710 ) is been so perplexed. He confided his himself together too late for the published four times a year and is a doubts and fears to many of his friends. appointment; that, when he finally benefit of membership of the And yet—Mary Todd still had a arrived at the Edwards home, he found Abraham Lincoln Association tremendous power over him. that Mary had gone; that he followed 1 Old State Capitol Plaza Some time toward the end of quickly to the scene of the party, and Springfield, Illinois 1840, Lincoln and Mary became there—much to his surprise and cha - 62701 engaged. But, hardly had the arrange - grin—he found her dancing happily ment been made, than both of them with Stephen A. Douglas, his arch Editorial and design services by again became doubtful. The quar - political rival. William B. Tubbs rellings and misunderstandings contin - According to this version, Mary— ([email protected] ) ued. They grew even worse. Miss noting the tardy arrival of Mr. Lin - Todd, in letters to friends, said—with - coln—not only ignored him, but flirt - out mentioning her betrothal to Lin - ed a little with Mr. Douglas. Seeing coln—that she was much puzzled this, Lincoln was so humiliated that he For the People 7 comforted her, and the engagement This is indicated by the manner in It was not an altogether happy was on again; that about two weeks which he asked and obtained release marriage. Some historians claim it was later—both having considered the from his tentative engagement to Mary tempestuous throughout. Others, matter carefully—Mary Todd released Owens, as well as in the reasons he more discerning, claim that Abraham him, both agreeing to go their separate gave for wishing to be released from and Mary Lincoln were better suited ways. There are many letters from both his engagement to Mary Todd. His and far happier together than the Lincoln and Mary Todd that seem to earlier love affair with Anne Rutledge world has been willing to believe. I confirm this version. was—without the slightest doubt—the think I have read very nearly all of the In any case, they did not meet great romance of his life, and proved a books, and many of the articles, that again until late in 1842. Meantime, sobering influence on all of his later have been written about Mary Lin - Mary Todd, though greatly concerned relationships with women. Certainly it coln and about her married life both about Lincoln’s health, remained was no ardent lover who courted Mary before and during the White House active and even saw quite a lot of Owens, nor was it an ardent lover who years. A great many of these, the Stephen Douglas. But, in letters to her courted and eventually married Mary majority, are cruel in their denuncia - best friend, she confided her sadness Todd. That side of Abraham Lincoln tion of her. These claim that she was over the turn of events. In addition to was buried with his first love, Anne. nothing but a shrew—that she made Douglas, Miss Todd received some It was in the fall of 1842—twenty- the life of her immortal husband attentions from Edwin B. Webb, a wid - two months after their estrangement— almost unbearable. ower, but, in letters, she told her inti - that Lincoln again saw Mary Todd. There is no doubt that Mary Todd mate friends that there was not, and They were brought together at the was highly temperamental. There is no could not be, anything serious home of Mrs. Simeon Francis, wife of doubt that she was super-critical. between them. Lincoln’s friend, the editor of the There is no doubt that she was often Lincoln, following the breaking of Sangamo Journal. It was a pleasant sur - devoid of tact. There is no doubt that the engagement, became consumed in prise for both. The meeting with Mary she was—during a large portion of her gloom. Indeed, for many months he Todd and their mutual friend, Julia married life—a nervous and mental was in a precarious mental condition Jayne, in writing pieces for the Journal invalid, subject to violent fits of anger, and his best friends feared that he satirizing James Shields, state auditor, and almost childish tantrums. There is would never again be himself. He who challenged Lincoln to a duel, no doubt that she was almost insanely became an even worse hypochondriac which, fortunately, ended in apologies jealous. There is no doubt that—at than he had been, and was practically on both sides. time—she nagged her patient husband unfit for work of any kind. But, after he It was not long after this—on outrageously. recovered from his period of mental November 4, 1842—that Lincoln and But, against these traits, it is only , he too began to see life in Mary Todd were married at the Ninian fair—I think—to contrast her almost a brighter light and to seek compan - W. Edwards home. The Reverend fanatical loyalty; her excellent judge - ionship elsewhere. Charles Dresser performed the ring ment in times of great stress; her The fact seems to be that Lincoln ceremony for the groom, thirty-three unswerving love and devotion both to had serious doubts of his ability to years old, and the bride, twenty-three her husband and to her children; make any woman permanently happy. years old. continued on page 8

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The Other Side of Lincoln Never Said That Mary Lincoln continued from page 2 Lincoln makes separate references to P ar t 1 the women who spearhead the effort dogs or cats throughout his writings, to restore Ford’s Theatre. But where he never uses the phrase “dog and continued from page 7 did Lincoln say it and in what context? cat.” The phrase “dog and” appears and—from a practical point of view— Lincoln uses the phrase “in the end” once in his poem “The Bear Hunt”: her driving ambition which forced Lin - seventeen times in his writings but “Now man and horse, with dog and coln to make the most of his ability and never followed by the rest of the gun.” his opportunities. Even those who quote. Nor can one find the phrase Finally, some confusion exists on have most bitterly assailed the disposi - “years in your life” or “life in your what people are calling “Lincoln’s for - tion and temperament of Mrs. Lincoln, years” in any of Lincoln’s writings. giveness speech.” In point of fact, it is have been forced to admit that— noted that the defeat of two the fictional musings of famed story - except for her indomitable will—Abra - of Lincoln’s congressional critics teller and motivational speaker Andy ham Lincoln never would have been brought him a sense of satisfaction. Andrews. In his best selling book, The president of the United States. It was The president did not share Hay’s joy. Traveler’s Gift: Seven Decisions that she who drove him forward and Rather Hay noted in his diary that Determine Personal Success (2002 ), upward. It was she who pulled him out Lincoln mused: “You have more of Andrews devotes the eighth chapter to of his despondent moods and gave him that feeling of personal resentment a story about Abraham Lincoln’s dis - the proddings which he so often than I. Perhaps I may have too little of cussion with Andrews’s main character, required. it, but I never thought it paid. A man David Ponder, at the Gettysburg has not time to spend half his life in National Cemetery shortly before Lin - *This is transcribed from a type - quarrels. If any man ceases to attack coln delivers his famous address. Lin - script presentation by Jewett J. Ricker me, I never remember the past against coln talks about forgiveness and hands Jr., who delivered it to the Joliet Illi - him.” Ponder a folded paper that contains nois Women of Rotary in February Lincoln’s religious sentiments Lincoln’s address on forgiveness: “The 1937. Ricker is the grandson of Mary remain a great mystery in spite of a Sixth Decision for Success: I will greet Todd Lincoln’s friend, Reverend recent wave of new studies. Many Web this day with a forgiving spirit.” David Swing. For additional informa - sites have attributed to Lincoln the fol - Andrews reflects not only on Lincoln’s tion, see Ann Ricker’s “Mary Lincoln lowing statement: “I care not for a notable forgiveness of enemies but also and the Swings,” which was published man’s religion, whose dog and cat are includes the forgiveness of one’s own in the spring 2000 issue of this not the better for it.” Not surprisingly, personal failings. An inspirational newsletter. This article will be conclud - the words are more frequently found piece, the words are entirely those of ed in the spring 2007 issue. on vegan and animal-rights sites. While Andy Andrews, not Abraham Lincoln.

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