^bttaoes ~ APRIL FOOLZI Warning: Do not take offense to anything in this issue, we don't want your tears or your emails. THE RAGO The Newspaper of Stockton College That's Dependent on Every Student's Body;) <3 xoxo gossip girl The Bells Tolls on Capital Hill
Nick Hertzberg ing the numbers taken from this year's Afgo Staff Writer Census, proving the Census is indeed jus tified after all. This week President Obama and the This Bill was seen as no surprise by Senate passed an absolutely monumental many, after President Obama's bus broke Legislative Bill, and not the silly down in Wyoming a year ago, the Healthcare Reform one. Though the President and staff members survived on Healthcare Reform Bill notably passed, it nothing but Taco Bell cheesy roll-ups and included insignificant and non-vital five layer nachos for days. Some call it an things, overall, for most upper crust bom enlightening, but Obama called it "the and bread folk, like this nations majority. best five days of eating one has ever Some of these are stale features, like let seen," and was severely impressed by the ting unemployed children stay on their restaurants cleanliness, flexibility and parents insurance until forty-years-old overall healthy nutritional meals- naming and the govemment begirming to tax Taco Bell "Americas Restaurant." beach-goers ten percent for tarming; thus Though some haters see it as the increasing the need for tarming salons to biggest conspiracy theory this side of JFK achieve your "Jersey Shore" glow. The in order to take out the big burger indus Bill overshadowed by this was undoubt try, others see it as a secret way to employ edly of more importance in the long mn more illegal Mexican workers. for America's growth and health. Obviously, Obama (and the Senate) see it The Taco Bell Bill, nicknamed "Legis- differently. The President concluded by dilla" by Vice President Joe "Big Deal" saying, to just "cool out, grab a Baja Biden, passed in a landslide victory; all. Blast, and rock out with your Tac' out." this except for one "nay" from some vegan in Nebraska. The Taco Bill, which was without a doubt the heart of the Obama 2009 Presidential campaign, mandates for a Top photo: President Obama sign minimum of three Taco Bell eateries per ing the Taco Bill ten-mile radius. It is on schedule to com mence by the year 2014. The building Bottom photo: President Obama planning is under way, and at the helm- a endorsing the Taco Bill at a press special leader of the TB-Committee! conference Committee leader Dick Cheney, gather I Didn't Spend 6 Weeks In A Medical License Reinstatement Ethics Class To Have You Call Me 'Mister ? taken from www.theonion.com them—or anyone with a loved and conditions for the next 90 from the witness stand. So should inevitably disappear and be one whom I may or may not have days. you. replaced with an envelope ftill of It's fragic how people treat permanently But it's bigger than me and the money is not only legally doctors in this day and age. The injured through now two separate occasions upon wrong—it's also morally wrong. I lack of respect for the education negligence or out which I've taken the Hippocratic know that now. The teacher. Dr. and training medical profession right dmnken- oath. It's about fradition. The title Brian, even helped me see that als go through, both before and ness—think they of doctor is steeped in history. It my patients were people with after unfortunate ethical trans have the right to is a recognition of years of hard feelings, no matter how little gressions, is downright shameftil, refer to me as one work, and it lets the community money they make or how igno and it has to stop right now. of their own? know that this particular'person rant they are about medicine. I After all, I didn't spend two It's not like has paid the $25,000 in fines wish I could go back in time and evenings a week for a month and they drove 45 required by the courts. Even if his redo those out-of-court settle a half attending a medical licerise miles every lawyer still thinks he can get that ment meetings with that babyless reinstatement class so you could Tuesday and reduced to $15,000. So when I couple. There'd be a lot less call me "mister." Thursday night to mn across people like this coffee swearing and threats of physical Yet just this moming, a cashier share a communi shop worker, it makes me sad, violence on my part. at the coffee shop in the hospital I ty college class because it shows just how much I'm just a different person can now legally work at again room with other our society has fallen. now. actually said it right to my face. disgraced physi You see, not being called So, yes, the mandatory med "Here's your change, mister." cians,! did they? "doctor" doesn't just affect me. It ical license reinstatement ethics Exact words. As if I didn't just Now that I've affects everyone in our hallowed class was difficult, and some- drop $1,200 on that board-certi relearned the frade who ever toiled for years in tirhes humiliating, but it was fied course to eam back the title basic attitudes and medical school or took a bribe so worth it. The nine months I "doctor" after the regrettable morals that should someone would be moved higher endured without a license were events of last May. act as an obvious guide for some That's right. According to the on the organ donation list. If one very dark indeed. Not because I Where does he get off? one in the medical profession, I great state of South Carolina's of us gets caught in the resulting couldn't practice medicine—• Am I the world's best doctor? expect to be called "doctor" in Board of Medical Examiners, I sting operation, then, in a way, which I definitely did—but Absolutely not. But. I am every circumstance. And if you should be afforded the honor and we all get caught in the resulting because people were not techni nowhere near the worst, either. disagree, then just take a look at courtesy of my position, even if sting operation. cally required to call me "doctor." And I'm certainly not the first to what's hanging on my wall: that you're part of that class-action You could say that the ethics Now they are, and by God, I will accidentally remove the wrong diploma, the medical license with suit pertaining to the tainted class I was forced to take has make sure they say it loud and kidney and then have to be the large red "X" stamped over it, blood. The lady who accused me made .me a better doctor. It clear. restrained by orderlies when the and that other, smaller license of sexual misconduct six years reminded me that signing, every Unless they're one of those family has the nerve to question that states I can practice medicine ago had the respect to call me Dr. sheet in your prescription pad and poor kids whose tongues I acci my excuses. So what makes under certain probationary terms Berstyn when she pointed me out leaving it in a spot where it will dentally removed. {609): I want a nerd because they are nice and have feelings and souls. Page 2 March 22, 2010
Chief's Corner *^Protectingy serving and THE ARGO educating America's future "Serving the Stockton Community Since .1971" >• G-202 The Richard Stockton College of New Jersey Pomona, New Jersey 08240 RSC - Responsible, Safe, Choices Email: [email protected] iii Phone (609) 652-4560 Chief Glenn Miller Our park-like setting on 1,600 NEWS!" We need to work on the Fax (609) 74&5565 mostly wooded acres has a lot to other 27% who don't) Advertising (609) 652^297 Welcome back from Spring do with that reputation. The rea •Only a very small percentage [email protected] Break and we hope everyone had son our college has maintained of college students consume alco an enjoyable and safe time. With that reputation is the result of our hol in an irresponsible maimer the warm weather and spring community's commitment to (EVEN GREATER NEWS and Una Wayman Editor-in-Chief Matthew Heidkamp Sports Editor ^ here, our thoughts turn to outside safety and the environment. with your help we can make it a Michelle Petrie A&E Editor activities and getting together There are several factors which much smaller percentage) Amanda Ismail Copy Editors with friends and family. We ask can impede our progress in safety Colleen Jacobsen that everyone remember "R.S.C." and environmental efforts. The As you can see, there are some Casey Phillips Advertising/Business and what it stands for; most important factor is responsi compelling statistics involved Manager Responsible, Safe Choices. This, bility of the individual. Although with the consumption of alcohol. does not refer to just the use of there is great effort put into pro If you choose to drink alcohol, alcohol or drugs, it refers to all viding a safe and clean environ please do it responsibly. If a the life choices you make. ment, an irresponsible person can friend has over-consumed alco Staff Writers For example, should I gamble damage that reputation. hol, please get them help as it Brittany Tenpenny, Mike Mesmer, Michael Ahrens, Mike Assad, my money at the casino; should I For example, over-consump- may be a dangerous medical con Scola Lee, Michael Meinberg, Eric Michels, Ashley Hart, Chris drive my car after drinking alco tion of alcoholic beverages is a dition if not attended to immedi Kerr, Kyle Hennahan, Dave Lamando, Kristopher Keaton, Nick hol; should I buy that new suit personal choice despite all the ately. Contact the police at 9-1-1, Hertzberg, Kelley Anne Essinger, Chris Donkin, Steven McPartlin even though I don't have the educational efforts exerted in the so we can help. Our college has • money to pay for it; should I get area. Concerning an individual a our "good Samaritan" policy so Printed by Borfosfi Printing, Inc. involved with a partner sexually; who may over-consume alcohol we can get these few irresporisi- should I have "that next drink; we need to understand the dan ble people the help they need. The Argo is not an official Publication of The Richard Stockton College of New should I skip class/work today? gers associated with doing that. Jersey, but produced independently by the students. The people listed above are the only qualified representatives of The Argo. Letters, There are many decisions we Here are some sobering facts that COMMUNITY NOTICE: opinions, photographs, cartoons, and articles are welcome by all. Deadlines are make throughout the course of are important for our students to Wednesdays by 5 PM. The Argo reserves f/ie right to edit or deny all submissions. our life that have a real potential be aware of concerning alcohol: Several members of our com Copyright Argo Corporation 2010 of affecting you for the rest of munity have had items stolen your life. R.S.C. reminds you to •Over 1,400 college students frpm their unsecured dorm rooms make those decisions wisely, die each year as a result of alco or apartments. Please make sure which means think about them hol consumption. your doors and windows are Your Friendly first. •Nearly 80% of those deaths locked and do not leave valuable If your decision is to have that are a result of motor vehicle acci items in plain view of visitors Five Pay Forecast next drink and drive your car, is dents. invited to your room. Also, don't frow Weather.eoiH that a good decision? If you •500,000 students are assault -forget to lock your car and decide to buy that new suit, put ed by someone who had been remove valuables from plain the $300 bill on your credit card drinking view. Tornado and pay it off monthly, is that a •70,000 .students report alco •OnDAY high: 117" good decision? Life is about hol related sexual assaults TIP OF THE WEEK: low: -22° choices and part of a young •75% of sexual assault victims In New Jersey, the estimated adult's life is learning to make the were intoxicated at the time of cost of a DWI arrest/conviction is best choices. In most decision the assault * - around $4,000., not including situations we have some time to •60% of students report trou attorney costs. Many lawyers ponder the various options we ble sleeping or studying because charge their services by the hour have. For example, your friends of distraction due to partying on which can range from $200-$500 Hurriane are having a party tonight with campus an hour.^ DWI costs for an attor high: 88° alcohol present. You are 20 years •According to a study con ney can result in significant addi TUESDAY low: 88° old and have been invited to the ducted at Colorado State tional costs to the arrested DWI party. University (1999), 44.2% of the driver. Use this information What are your decision students surveyed did something when making the decision ?/?0 options? You can accept the invi they later regretted as a result af whether or not to drive your car tation or decline it. If you accept, alcohol consumption. after you have been drinking Mostly Monsoon-y you can attend and drink alcohol •21-24 age group, highest fre alcohol. HCDnUDIIY high: 12° or attend and not drink alcohol. quency of driving while intoxi low: 10° You can attend, drive your car to cated (DWI) Remember^ a the party or you can drive with •1 person is killed every 30 somebody else. Have you minutes in a fatal DWI crash community is thought about a designated driver •40% of all fatal accidents only as safe as or not? The decision making involve alcohol process for this simple everit can •$51 billion yearly cost of that community's go on and on, but I think the point DWI '1 has been made. **I ask our womgn to pay par commitment to TIIURIDnY sr low: 68*" Decisions can be made with ticular attention to the sexual its safety. Please some thought in mind when mak assault victim information ing those decisions. Our R.S.C. regarding alcohol consumption. contact us with kh Program asks that you spend the time to make the right decision, GOOD NEWS!: any security or one that will keep you safe and safety concern at Hey, it's my anniver you will not be ashamed of in the •70% of college students have rRIDAY sary! fiiture. never'driven under the influence 609-652-4390 or high: 104° of alcohol (A much lower statistic low: 40° Stockton College has a reputa than 20 years ago) 9-1-1 in an tion as a campus that is safe, •73% of college students use a emergency. ^f/2 enjoyable and environmental. designated driver (GREAT March 22,2010 Gasoline Fight! Page 3 Police Blotter: 3/10/10-4/1/10 3 Suspicious Activities of many fish. is bad for you. Get em Bill. 1 Suspicious Persons 3 Suspicious Vehicles An oil tanker cap sized 1 Creepy guy with a in Lake Pam, killing all Treat me to a nice lob YEAH. mustache scaring chil fish and inhabitants. ster dinner. dren 3 Assaults with a ban- A fish truck fell into nana Lake Fred, allowing 2 Animal Sacrifices fish life to be restored. So Vm having mixed feelings about this 4 Drive-bys week's Plotter By the Numbers: 1 Illegal use of text Professor Bill Daly books karate chopped a Not because it is lacking substance...it 700 Calls to Housing 1 4 Robo-trips Young Republican is actually filled with really amazing, 214 Calls to Housing 2 2 Michael Jackson club leader. truthful happenings. 111 Calls to Housing 3 moonwalk impressions 234 Calls to Housing 4 3 Counts of I'm upset because this is my last week 141 Calls to Housing 5 Shennanigans Tips: as Plotter &uy Starting next week we 1 Large Farva are not allowed to make jokes in the 79 Alarms (14 Bring your green hat Plotter and I am being replaced. Abnormal, 2 Burglar, 9 while streaking. Fire, 22 Air Drill, 14 Highlights I want to appologize to all for abusing Funk Master Flex my responsibilities as Plotter &uy and I Sirens) A student was seen Keep the fish alive, so will miss you all. streaking through the we can hunt them and 6 Parking Complaints quad with his green eat them. 38 Citations shoes and Snoop If you want me back send complaints to 3 MV Accidents Dogg. STK^7708® go.stockton.edu. 4 MV Lockout Don't eat dolphin 6 Housing Lockouts A bus drove into Lake meat...it has a lot of Fred, ending the lives mercury in it and that I love you.
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iHamster To Hit the Market Anything Goes on the Island
Nick Hertzberg Eric Michels gal gambling to midget wrestling. Rago Staff Writer Rago Staff Writer There are constantly bonfires, danc ing, live music, drinking games, fire The iPod, iMac and iPad released It is no surprise to anyone that works, barbecues, and everything by Apple will soon be taking a back there has been a significant amount that college kids could ever want. seat to Steve Jobs newest innova of renovation and constmction going With larger turnouts every night, the tion, in which the billionaire genius on throughout our campus. Stockton island is really becoming a "hot spot" finally Jackles the answer to pet- has been working with NJ zoning in this pine-barrens wasteland. owners problems. Jobs recently professionals throughout the last few Stockton faculty and staff mem unveiled, at a seminar in Los months to determine where campus bers as well as the police department Angeles a new iRodent, not the expansions are possible, only to have expressed concem about the iMouse though, because that's just a uncover an interesting piece of infor safety of all the students on the boring app. The much-anticipated mation. island. iHamster will soon be seeing its way Apparently the island, the small 'We do not have boats, just ener- into the homes of millions world piece of land in the middle of Lake gy-efficient golf carts. God forbid if wide, come July 2010. Fred, is not documented property, something happens on that island, it For years the Tamagotchi has and therefore is not owned by either is up to the State Police to bring in a ruled the virtual pet market, overall Stockton or the State. This could helicopter. This is both costly to the making the need to have "actual" mean that for a short period of time, School and for taxpayers," reported cats or dogs, etc, totally irrelevant. there are virtually no laws or regula Officer Daniels. But, since the malicious outbreak of tions to anyone residing on the While it is expected that state leg the Plague in the Tamagotchi realm in 2007, rewarding Virtual and ePets sector. All of this island. islators are^wojking jyith the^ollege owners have resorted goiiig back to real flesTi follows with^he failures"tjf BiU Gates to create Within the 4ast two weeks tfiere administration tQ rapidly put an end and blood animals-, which have previously been such "iAnimals" as the "Gorilla XP" and have been a lot of students using to this free-for-all, the college stu a total hassle. "Microsoft Bear 7- Home Edition;" Jobs clearly rafts, boats, and anything that floats dents are getting the most out of it The iHamster, according to Jobs came as an has a clear-cut comer on the market of a techno to get to this island. A local frat while they-can. inspiration fi^om the net, and will "Bring joy, logical product for the first time in years. launched an all out kegger last "Of course it won't last. It's peace, and a sense of responsibility to all kids- But what about all the messy work that kids Saturday on the island, having their - Stockton. You pretty much get tased no matter their age." do not like to do? Well no worries- it is all-pro- pledges hard at work sailing students for drinking a beer a few feet from The Cricetinae (hamster subfamily) obses grammable! With the connection of a USB and back and forth to the apartments all your apartment," stated Chris Catelli, sion for Jobs began with the birth of the modem the click of a button, the iHamster's bathroom, night. a junior at Stockton College. Intemet, which was approximately marked by mating, sleep and cannibalizing other iHamsfers "It is so much fim partying on the Rumors are that MTV has been the 1997 creation of Hamsterdance.com. The functions can be shut off or regulated to fit island, everyone just lets loose and considering shooting a short televi adorable little hamsters dancing and singing in YOUR schedule! These state-of-the-art features has a good, spiritual time. You don't sion series of the events called, "The imison reportedly are what made Jobs quit his ensure every owner to only have the best times have to worry about RA's or cops Island." The production team would outdoor plumbing job in 1997 and found the possible with the product, and its almost like a with sticks up their asses trying to set up cameras all-over the island, industry shaking Apple some months later. After real responsibility! For hours on end you will be min your good time!" stated Karen much like a reality show. Whether or all the years of music, computer, and other com dancing, singing, rolling around in plastic balls- Schwartz, a sophomore at the col not they will be able to get permits to munications innovation- Jobs is returning to his and doing whatever Richard Gere might have lege. bring cameras onto the island and 'real love- making coiisunrers happy. This* time ihteptioas of, all vv^th your little new^ syntheti Kids have been getting away with produce the show'is still up in the air. however, it will be with the retum of the highly cally furred fnend. everything on this island, from ille
iji i i{:i: in s i iioiiNT niivi LorMiiNi TME CCHtlCi: IH- mW jfeltSiY 2010 SPRING CALENDAR OF EVENTS Thread Exchange March 30th 12:00 pm TRLC Marketing Your Event or Organization March 30th 4:30 pm F206 Mister Stockton Pageant - Class of 2012 March 30th 7:30 pm Alton Auditorium Alpha Phi Delta Rose Pageant March 31st 8:00 pm Alton Auditorium MCC Boundless Word Poetry March 31st 8:00 pm Upper G Wing ' SET & STD Deal or No Deal April 1st 8:00 pm Alton Auditorium Zeta Phi Beta Sorority, Inc Dance April 2nd 9:00 pm N Wing (ID Required, Doors Close at 11pm) LSU Do You Want to Salsa with That April 6th 8:00 pm Upper G Leading Change April 7th 4:00 pm F206 . ; Greek Week Basketball & Volleyball April 5th 8:00 pm I Wing Gym , Greek Week Dodge ball April 6th 8:00 pm I Wing Gym Greek Week Field Events & Hero Campaign April 7th 12:00 pm Housing IV Quad Greek Week Greek Sing & Banner Competition April 8th 8:30 pm I Wing Gym Greek Week Boat Raccs and BBQ April 9th 3:00 pm Lodge @ Lakeside Oasis T SET Spring Concert Flo Rida & Nina Sky April 9th 7:30 pm Sports Center Water Watch/Energy Corp. Forum April 10th 8:00 am Alton Batde of the Bands Shred for Haiti April 10th 7:00 pm Lodge @ Lake ^ ; • m a Sherman Tank! Emari DiGiorgio Elected U.S. President Dave Lamando Professor Nathan Long and British band Rago Staff Writer The XX were featured. Her skyrocket to power is surprisingly Last week, a historic event occurred unsurprising; Stockton faculty and students when Stockton literature professor Emari have been dealing with intense media cov DiGiorgio was elected as the 45th erage since January. While interviewed on President of the United States of America. the Today Show, former student Jason After Obama resigned to enjoy more time Berlinger said "Well, Eva Marie is a glori with his family, and Joe Biden quit, com ous woman. She likes to be on top of plaining that "this is a big f'cking deal". things and could handle being the president DiGiorgio, an NYU MFA graduate, was of every country in the world. I'm amazed nominated for the position; her national by her eloquent characteristics and her fame began with her appointment as the sexy charm. She will be the greatest pres Consultant in Poetry to the Library of ident of the United States, and I'm in love Congress last month. with her" A landmark election DiGiorgio landed DiGiorgio's first action in office is to 69% of the popular vote, defeating former- create a Poetic Learner's Permit. "Poetic Alaska Governor Sarah Palin; DiGiorgio's Licenses are commonplace, but it would be Inauguration began with her reading per beneficial to poets to have a six-month sonal poetry sUch as "Head in a Hand educational period beforehand. Anyone Basket", "Women in their Twenties", and can write poetry, but honestly, lessons in "No, You Actually Can't See Russia fi-om stmcture are cmcial." There." A line froiji "Twenties" reads; "A Already making waves after a short few offer themselves up to be eaten / We time, it is certain DiGiorgio's time mnning are all hungry", deeply meditating on America will be its most progressive and America's lack of enthused volunteer interesting. action, and the craving for consumption that has helped drag the country to its cur rent state. DiGiorgio's Vice President George Clooney delivered several remarks in-between signing fan autographs. The ceremony was administered by Stockton 2010 Spring Graduates Bare All Kelly Smelly Bigfatbelly actually do some work. Rago Staff Writer The good news is, however, that the Wellness Center will be giving out special $2.49 The Richard Stockton College of New treatment the day before graduation Jersey has run including out of caps and free pedi SIX INCH SUB gowns for its cures, man- 2010 spring i c u r e s , With This Coupon graduates, but spray tans, the school massages, Good only at Galloway Subway & Hamilton MaU Food Court. wants every and — Pick from: VEGGIE, HAM, BLT, CHICKEN, one to wear — most or not wear — important SPICY, COLDCUT, BUFFALO CHICKEN, the same thing ly —body TURKEY, HAM, TUNA. on the day of waxing. commence So hats ment; off (and According to everything President else) to the Herman spring Saatkamp, this graduates means that of 2010 NOT BE COMBINED WITH COUPON OFFERS DISCOUNT CARDS. One "the graduates who will be coupon per customer per visit +tax if applicable. Not for sale. Restrictions may will have to go showing off their best ASSets during this apply. Excludes double meat, bacon and avocado. Offer does not apply to orders to the ceremony naked." semester's graduation ceremony! for Premium Subs or DOUBLESTACKED- subs, incld. THE FEAST. No$ value. Stockton cannot aflford"to order any Prices may vary. Coupon may not be altered or truncated. SUBWAY® is REG more caps and gowns as it has spent too Trademark of DAI. much money on fancy signs and bribes doled out to the campus center.constmc tion workers in hopes of getting them to Ra Ra Oh Ra Raa Taking Action Against the Undead Get Hands-On Experience Kelly Smelly Bigfatbelly ing for new-comers who are will Michael Ahrens about the zombies, and this meas taxes towards wealthy Americans Rago Staff Writer ing and ready try out any and all Rago Staff Writer ure is intended to change that by to help find a cure for the living positions offered. Dress attire for researching every aspect of zom dead virus. It is also logical to Don't know what to, do with this event is minimal. Included in President Obama's bie life in hopes of finding a include the measure in the health your degree? Interested in the sweeping healthcare overhaul cure." care bill because current insur- entertainment business? Then bill, according to a source from Obama^s_^d R^d's^cjaiins, ; ance plans do not cover zombie head down to Stockton's first within the WhitrHouse,tS a po"-" that scientific research is the most bites, the primary way that infect Fleshy Career & Intemship Fair vision that serves as the federal effective way to destroy these ed zombies transmit their disease and find out how you can get government's first major effort to zombies were strongly rebuked to humans, or other undead-relat- some hands-on experience in the address the threat that flesh eat by Sen. Judd Gregg, R-NH, the ed injuries. In almost all circum World of entertainment. ing zombies pose to the American ranking Republican , on the stances, according to Marsh, "The Fleshy Career & people. Speaking at a news con newly-created Senate Committee zombie victims are "left on their Intemship Fair will be a great ference in Washington, D.C., on the Living Dead. "The only own" by big insurance compa way to help Stockton students President Obama - joined by way to stop a zombie is to shoot nies, who normally lock infected gain some real-world experience Senate Majprity Leader Harry it in the head," said Gregg, speak humans in a secure room, wait before heading out after gradua Reid - announced that funding ing from a self-defense seminar for them to zombify, and then kill tion," said Herman Saatkamp, was being put in place so that a sponsored by the National Rifle them and bum the body. "This President of The Richard cure to the deadly zombie virus Association. Gregg also noted measure in many ways is a wake- Stockton College of New Jersey. could be researched by the that the US military was working up call to Big Insurance saying The fair will be located in the nation's top scientists. closely with weapons manufac 'you cannot treat zombie victims I-wing gymnasium after church "The^ threat posed by the turers to finalize completion of a like second-class citizens. They this Sunday where escort servic undead is the biggest danger the new mass-produced assault rifle have rights just like any other es, pom stars, local strippers and American people face on a daily designed specifically for destroy American citizen and you cannot other peeping toms will be look basis," the president announced. ing the undead. "This new rifle is simply ignore them xmtil they "Every time an American leaves capable of firing an acid-tipped die." the safety of their home, they run bullet at nearly 3Q00 feet per sec While public opinion favors the risk of being attacked by ond and comes with a chainsaw the measure, others are still skep zombies. My top priority is to bayonet that's perfect for mash tical that zombie vims research is counter this danger so that ordi ing up a zombie's virus-infected a practical way to address the nary people can feel safe without brain. Sarah (Palin) shot a zom problem. Max Brooks, the chair a chainsaw every time they go bie from a helicopter with one of man of the non-govemmental out to buy milk and bread." these guns and its head literally group ZombieWatch, expressed Obama went on to add that melted and exploded at the same caution. "There's no sign a cure although the number of zombie time. It was so Peking cool." is even possible to find. The best attacks has been on the decline in Randy Marsh, a leading polit thing any concemed people can recent months, that is not evi ical strategist at the University of do is to stockpile as much non- dence that the undead are becom Colorado, considers Obama's perishable food and water as pos ing less of a threat. "If anything, new measure a smart move. sible, find a secure location and this may be a sign that the living Because the majority of zombie- fortify it. The best approach to dead are biding their time, attack victims are lower-income this problem is to accept that strengthening their numbers people living in rural areas, it zombies may soon take over the before they strike again. It's makes "perfect political sense" to world and you have to do what alarming how little we know use proceeds from increased ever it takes to survive." f=riclay, April 9, 2010 Stoclcton Sports Centec Doors Open 7:pO p-mj F«aturlfBSi lATltli Special oiaest ina Sicy D.OO wittl $20^00 Riililic TICKETS llOlllf on SALE at Stockton Performing Arts Center Box Offli Box Office Hours 9:00 am — 3;00 pm fVlonday- Friday, ^ ^ fVlust be 18 years or older or accotupanled toy an adutt. www.stoclcton.eciu S T* U D E NT D E E JL O P IVI E IS| T THE RICHARO S-rOCK-rOfsI COLLEGE OF IMEW JERSey Km so 3008 February 31, 2202 Jordan Loses Bobcats to Mugsy Intramural Sports Matthais Kamper The White Larry Bird News Last week basketball hall-of- Here's what's famer and degenerate gambler Michael- Jordan paid just over As of April 1st happening this $50 million to acquire the Charlotte Bobcats NBA fran KicKa week: chise, a purchase he quickly regretted. Stockton Following the night of the Monday. purchase, Mr. Jordan and fellow College has Space Jam star and father of Nate 3/29 Robinson of the New York terminated all Kjiicks, Mugsy Boges, celebrated by spending a weekend in Reno, intramural Quiditch Nevada. Sources noted that on night one of their celebratory trip, sports activity. ys Rowan Jordan rented a stretch Hunmier limosuine fully stocked with 11pm enough cocaine and hookers to fuel the late Ghris Farley for atleast 12 hours, which by no means should be ingested by any one not on Chris Farleys level. Tuesday. With Bogues' high coming to 3/30 a crash in the early hours of 4:30 AM on Saturday moming, Jordan, still amped up on nqse candy and praise, decided to hit Underwater the roullette tables. To keep Basket Weaving Mugsy safe, Jordan proceeded to duct tape him to the hood of the ys Montclair limosuine as a hood omiment, paying the limosuine driver off State with 10 percent ownership of his newly acquired Bobcats. 3pm Bogues awoke at 9AM strand ed in the desert with nothing on but a Burger King crown. Guys Standing Furious, Bogues used the limo's angry with the prank and called a unconsious body in front of NBA car phone to call Jordan, who, tmce over taking peyote from a commissioner David Stem's Around a after losing 20 percent oWner wandering Native American house with nothing but a Burger Diamond Hitting ship and his son's college tuition magic man. What Jordan didn't King crown on. Bogues is now at the roullette tables and was know was that Bogues did not serving six months in juvenile a Ball with a currently at the strip club buying ingest any of the dmg but dou detention for driving with out a lap dances wit h pieces of the bled Jordan's dose. After throw seatbelt. Stick Bobcat franchise (signed on used ing Jordan in the tmnk for three Jordan went on to attempt to ys Someone napkins), was asked to meet days, Bogues agreed to release sell back the Bobcats, which was Bogues in the desert. Jordan if he signed over what was immediately shut down via 3pm Upon Jordan's arrival to the left of the Bobcats' franchise, prison phone call from new desert, the furious Bogues which he did. owner Mugsy Bogues. assured Jordan that he was not Bogues dropped Jordan's Wednesday 3/31 ©IF tHh© Man Sport vs Catholic 8pm The amount o Thursday-Sunday people injurec 4/1-4/4 amongst the Tiger Woods Various sports scandal: him«!^ and actiyities either at Stockton self. or at some other ^ •• • - ^ school, you don't need me to tell you...get inyolyed. The Cleavland Cavliers have made a prototype to boost their defense. They call it the MechaShaq and it's Shaqtas(fc. Theonion.com W:- _iiBi So are Tribal Tats YouVe so 2000 and latel Brett Favre polls Stockton students to decide next move! Yes! The rumors are absolute ly true. NFL legend Brett Favre and his agents have asked us here at Richard Stockton College to A) Retiuii to tiie Vikiiigs for anotliei season? fill out a poll on what we, the fans, think Favre should do next with his life, as he is so often not B) Go back to Gr een Ba^' able to make up KiS mind. So fill out these surveys and send them to Favre's agent Bus Cook. ...Seriously, send it. C) Retiie all eacfy and go himting e\'eiy da}^? Attn: Bus Cook I Willow Bend Dr Hattiesburg, MS 39402 D) Start a dog figliting ling? (601) 264-9490 Yes, this is not a joke. E) Date a liigli schoolei? •v.'-.,,, ,, F) Dancing with the Stars? ' •. N • G) Mow onto pro baseball \ia Ivhchael Joi dan':" H) Start a rock band? I) Biiy the Charlotte Bobcats fi om o\\n& Miiss\' Bosiies'^ J) Play football in the mud witti his , imathl^c fiimds wMe wejiring "real, comfortable. JejirLS."? The Future of Brett Farve is in your hands! Hey you, reader! Come be a sports writer for the Argo We pay you more than l?an Marino gets for doing a Slim Fast commercial It'sfun You make money &ood resume booster We know you're excited Email - Stk?7708®go.stockton.edu - Page 10 October 8, 2010 2009's Top Online April Fool's Pranks 1. Googlel gave us CADIE, the world's first Cognitive Autoheuristic Distributed-intelligence Entity (CADIE). After scanning the Web, CADIE designed this page to reflect the general populus. 2. TorrentFreak told us that Warner Brothers plans to acquire The Pirate Bay. 3. Arrington announced that he was looking for a date from readers and that General Mills had acquired CrunchGear. 4. CenterNet- MlYReODITS ' RrOOIT.COM **ICS FONNV POLITICS WTF SCIENCE PROGIW^MMING TECIIIWt«^» works announced the News, Images. Videos CN51 Startup Th# Intemat $uck» on April 1#t trm conference. tz ktm-z agrt bf Ksm •'-'•4n4 rofiinietHs s^rfiare 5. SocialBlade '•T fiia •It- claimed they -&jr¥ cracked the * tiardfiuti t .*•'» 9 lwy only. ^permiflnk, iwreiit reply ^ 7. Woot.com ^ dranltygrMfi ,35 y houhs ' r" was selling a I onmd off a#8t»m st^ optkin in pmfs. mucft , " ' - , J.- pw«ift reply bag of crap for ' - 4- ckctofrtK^ o '.ft b Iwmrn C*! ' $3.00 and $1 ifef »»t - 8h« sty^ wm a0f Mm mm «* tt*8 mmrn rnMrnmay wtiiB itxi million ship At least (««*« Oifgl it »»« evsry tinw i tt» pa^. I as:««n« tttat m fymd fey now tout f. up 0(^3 foi bette/. ' , ping. 8. Opera Reddit replaced their entire user interface to look just like Digg. Photo provided by pulse2.com announced face-gestured web browsing. 9. Car and Driver reported that President Obama wanted "a complete withdrawal from America's pre mier racing series is expected to save more than $250 million between GM and Chrysler, a substantial amount considering the drastic measures being implemented elsewhere." 10. Qualcomm stated that their convergence program had implemented tiny base stations into thou sands of pigeons. They also stated that these are no ordinary pigeons but a hybrid wolfpigeon. 11. SlideShare told their users that they are Rockstars. 12. Funny or Die wrote that they have been acquired by Reba McEntire and is now called RebaOrDie.com. 13. AOL Radio was considering playing Rick Astley's Never Gonna Give You Up all over AOLRadio.com. 14. Amazon.com launched brand new cloud computing service called Floating Amazon Cloud Environ ment (FACE). 15. Reddit redesigned its homepage to mimic Digg's. There was even an option to "redd" your favorite ^ postings. 16. YouTube turned its videos upside down 17. Gmail launched an AutoPiiot feature, which "analyzes" your personal messages, and responds (and offends) all by itself. 18. Fark launched its own facebook Ma^ 22,20Q4 Page 77 'W_ " m^: UIGGKIY HOROSCOPES Fiskiii Cilnnii... Taken fronri the experts at www.theonion.com Libra more than to reveal yourS (9/23-10/22) future this week, but unfbrtu-l nately, they're just large lumi-i You will once again bring out nous balls of plasma held! the very best in your local police, fire, and sanitation con together by gravity in space. | trol departments. Taurus a Scorpio (4/20-5/20) I You might be nervous and] (10/23-11/22) intimidated and even a little| Admitting to* past mistakes is scared, but take heart: Those I never easy, so It's a good thing women are just as frightened; you happen to be an unrepen of you as you are of them. I tant bitch. - Gemini Sagittarius J (5/21-6/21) (11/22-12/21) A popular new idiom will; Your hard work and dedication soon be coined, thanks to| will finally pay off this week you, that broken-down applel when you're accepted into pie cart, and all those quarters! Harbard. Unfortunately for you, tumbling out of your ass. I though, that's not a typo. Cancer Capricorn (6/22-7/22) (12/22-1/19) All the praying in the world! The stars indicate that this is a can't save you now Quick,! good week to start up new turn to demon worship and I and steamy romances. Your the black arts before it's too' office's sexual harassment late. policy, however, indicates oth erwise. • Leo i (7/23-8/22) 1^2^; Aquarius Alcohol, a case of mistaken ^ (1/20-2/18) identity, and two screaming Long after the dust has settled, ends of a pantomime horse the smoke has cleared, and will figure heavily this coming everyone has said their piece, Thursday. you'll still be standing there, asking a bunch of ridiculous questions. " (8/23-9/22) Pisces As an educator, you always hoped you'd make a differ (2/19-3/20) ence someday, which just goes The little voices inside your to show that no one is ever head will continue to disagree too old to learn something over what to set fire to first. new. in Aries (3/21-4/19) The stars would love nothing ...'nnff said April 1,2014 _ Be Prepared ~ April Fool's Day Defense Kit Beware strange animals. If a story whiffs even remotely of the hotheaded naked ice borer, it's likely to be a hoax. Technology Review hoaxed its readers with an April Fools' story in 1985 titled "Retrobreeding the Woolly Mammoth." In 1984, * the Orlando Sentinel did the same with a piece about the cockroach-devouring Tasmanian mock walrus. In 1994, London's Daily Star sports pages reported that invading superworms might destroy the Wimbledon green. Turn off your radio. Deejays love to pull practical jokes on April Fools' Day. In 1989, KSLX-FM in Scottsdale, Ariz., broad cast the claim that the station had been taken hostage by Pima Indians, prompting calls to the police. WCCC-AM/FM in Hartford, Conn., told listeners on April 1, 1990, that a volcano had erupted not far away. San Diego's KGB-FM alerted listeners on April 1,1993, that the space shuttle Discovery had been rerouted from Edwards Air Force Base to a local airport. Thousands showed up to view the landing despite the fact that the spacecraft was earthbound that day. It's not just shock jocks pulling the pranks—you can't trust NPR, either. Its "humorists" have aired pieces on portable zip codes you can take with you when you move (2004), federal health care for pets (2002), and advertisements projected onto the moon (2000). Shun the British press. The British tabloids make stories up all the time, but on April Fool's Day, everybody on Fleet Street fabricates. The Times used the day to run a spoof ad announc ing an auction of "surplus intellectual proper ty"—various patents, trademarks, and copy rights. The Daily Mail announced the postpone ment of Andrew and Fergie's wedding because of a clash with Prince Charles' calendar. He was going to be butterfly-hunting in the Himalayas. The Daily Mail told readers that nuclear sub marines were now patrolling ttie Thames. The Independent published a scoop about skirts for men at a fashionable shop. The Guardian declared it would replace the women's page with the men's page. In 2000, the Times com plained that the surreal quality of the news- Labor turning right wing, for example—had taken the ease out of cracking a good April Fools' joke. If they pranked before, they'll prank again. In addition to the British press and NPR, the weekly chain formerly known as New Times Inc. (now Village Voice Media) loves to hoax its readers. Google has established a reputation for silly hoaxes with pages hyping its Google MentalPlex and PigeonRank technologies. It once posted openings for its Googlelunaplex office on the moon and introduced a smart- drink called GoogleGulpl Too good to be true. News organizations sometimes fall for the April Fools' Day pranks perpetrated by outside hoaxsters, so don't expect every clue to be obvious. If an April 1 article declares that something valuable is now "free" or purports to break news about ^hidden treasure," you're being had. Does an organization's acronym or abbreviation spell April Fool? Also, scan copy for anagrams of "April Fools'" or some similar play on words. Discover's story on the hotheaded naked ice borer cited as its authority wildlife biologist "Aprile Pazzo," which is Italian for April Fool. Alex Boese, curator of the Museum of Hoaxes and expert on all things April Fools', advises that you finish reading articles before rushing into the next cubicle to spread the incredible news. Many hoax articles end with an obvious clue or an explana tion that it's all a joke. Double-check all radio warnings of disasters—volcanic eruptions, floods, killer bee invasions—and ques tion any story uncovering a new, onerous tax (say, on Linux). New-product announcements that arrive on or near April 1, such as the left-handed Whopper, should be approached with skep ticism, Boese says, but he cautions against reflexive hoax-spotting. On March 31, 2004, Google released the beta version of Gmail, which featured 1 GB of free storage, cavernous compared to other e-mail provider offerings. That was the same day the company unveiled its Googlelunaplex plans. The moon joke and the generosity of Gmail's 1 GB storage caused some nerds to sense a con and insist—wrongly—that Gmail was a giant April Fools' Day hoax. •' Provided by www.slate.com Page 20. Calendar April 2009 room F-207. We offer "dine- about the transition from student to of 2012? Join class council! arounds" to different resta- practitioner. For more information raunts, hotel tours, network please contact the advisor at STAND - A Student Anti-Genocide ing oppurtunities, and much [email protected]. Coalition - For more info, contact more. For more information STAND , at come to our meetings and find OGRE: Ord^r of Greco-Roman [email protected] or on out what you're missing out Enthusiasts. If you are interested in Facebook! Meetings will be Tuesdays on. Ancient Greek or Roman history and at 4:30 in G 206. culture, this club is for you! We meet Idols of the Tribe Literary every other thursday at 4:30pm in F121 Stockton Christian Fellowship- meets Club - Contact Zaneb Ghaneb to discuss upcoming events. Our next Tues 8pm TRLC. 268 Worship- at stk34704. Idols is open to meeting is February 18th. If you have Sundays at 5pm Lakeside Center. all Stockton students who any questions, email our Secretary, Tori Contact Pastor Ray Laird 609.425.5397 have a love (or just a like) for ([email protected]). or [email protected] SCF was estab all things literary. Find us on lished to share God's message of love, Facebook! (LIT majors, also Philosophy Society - The philosophy and forgiveness with the Stockton stu see Sigma Tau Delta.) society holds meetings and discussions dent body and faculty to strengthen the every other Wednesday in BO 15 at spiritual life of the Christian students International Business 8pm. If you are interested and want to on campus. Society meets every Thursday be in the club, email Jesse at stk26622 in room G-206. Contact for more info. The Philosophy Society The Stockton Entertainment Team Ngozi Areh at is open to people of all majors and meets Thurs at 5 pm in F207. An stk3 5 [email protected]. minors, http://loki.stockton.edu/~sps organization created to provide various IBS promotes awareness social and entertainment programs to among the Student in the Phi Sigma Tau - The Stockton the entire student community. Open to 2011 Junior Class Council- meets off campus. We volunteer at the Richard Stockton Community College "Zeta" Chapter of Phi Sigma all students. Contact SET at x4926 or every Tuesday at 8pm in G208. We are ACRM, animal shelter, suruise assisted on the Global Economy,'as well as the Tau, The International Honor Society [email protected]. www.stock- the leading leaders of our 2011 Junior living, salvation army and many more! Career Opportunities in the for Philosophy meets three times per ton.edu/set. class. Any further questions, email There are many opportunites for leader International Business Arena. semester to discuss issues of philosoph Conor Sullivan at [email protected] ship positions and scholarships are ical import. For more information, The Stockton Fencing Club meets ton.edu available. Looks great on a resume! Lambda Gamma Honor Society- please contact Professor Lucio Monday's and Thursday's 8 PM to 10 "Live to serve. Love to serve." meets in conjunction with GEROS on Privitello: [email protected] or PM, in {he Big Blue Sports Center, Active Minds is a nation wide mental the 3rd Thursday of the month at 4:30 stop by K-161. Court# 3, behind the far side bleachers. health awareness, education, and advo The Economics Society- meets p.m. in Room F-224. Lambda Gamma Everyone is welcome and no prior cacy group. Great for psychology Thursday at 4:30pm at J103. Contact is Stockton's chapter of Sigma Phi Psychology Club promotes the expo experience is need. Come dressed with majors, but all are welcome! We meet Kate [email protected] ,or Omega (SPO), the national academic sure of professional vies of psychology sneakers and long sweat paints. Please, Tuesdays 6pm in room H115. Find us find out more about the club at face- honor and professional society in and enhancing the learning experience check the club's web page for more on Facebook(Active Minds: Stockton book. The society seeks to provide stu gerontology. SPO was established in of students in psychology. Open to all info and last minute updates. Chapter)! dents with an appreciation for econom 1980 to recognize the excellence of students. . Contact Kristen at http://loki.stockton.edu/~fencing/ » ics by offering different activities both those who study gerontology/aging, as [email protected]. Alpha Sigma Lambda is the National at school as well as outside school. The well as to serve as a link between The Stockton Irish Dance Club meets Honor Society for non-traditional stu society offers trips, movies, discussions gerontology educators, alumni, and Pride Alliance Every Thursday at 4:30 every Monday from 8-9:30pm, dents. To join Stockton's chapter, and much more. Students from every local professionals and the outstanding in F 209. Contact Mico at Tuesdays from 9-10:30 pm, and, Epsilon Eta Nu, contact major and minor are welcome. Come, service of professionals who work with [email protected], or visit us Thursdays from 9-10:30 pm in N115. • [email protected] for an have a good time and be ready to expe or on behalf of older persons. on our Facebook group. Pride Alliance Our purpose is to expose the Stockton application, or pick one up in Alpha rience economics in a whole new way. is a social/activist group working to community to Irish culture through fra- Sigma Lambda's G-wing mailbox. Los Latinos Unidos- meets Thurs from bring awareness and educate others ditional Irish Dancing. Contact Return applications to our advisor. The EOF Leadership 5-6 in HI 16. Contact James about GLBT issues, speaking out Cathleen Dower at stk38364 for more Asst. Dean of Students Tom O'Donnell Alliance/A.E.S.N.J. will have meet [email protected]. Find us against discrimination, and forming a info. Find us on Facebook! in J-wing. ings on October 18th and Nov. 1st and on Facebook. LLU acts as a function widely diverse community, and bring 15 th, 2009 in room Nil 5 from 6:00 pm ing vehicle on campus for the promo ing equality to all here at Stockton. All Stockton Speech and Hearing Club : The Argo meets Mondays at 2:30 in G- - 8:00 pm. tion of meaningful dialogue between are welcome to our Safe Zone! meetings are Wednesdays on 10/21, 202. For any questions, call 4560 or different cultural entities. Contact Jen 11/4, 11/18, 12/2. For more informa stop by our office to meet our charming Equestrian Club- meets at 8pm in Perez at [email protected] Public Health Society meets every tion contact Lindsey Sickler at editors. Find us on Facebook. TRLC Meeting Room 1 every other for more information. Tuesday from 4:30 to 5:30 in B105. [email protected]. Tuesday. Contact Jessica Fisch at 609- To provide guidance to all students in The Speech and Hearing Club is open The Art Club meets every Thursday at 805-0938 or M.A.L.E.S. seeks and aims to develop health related program to promote to people with all majors and minors. If 4:30 at the Lakeside Lounge. Invite [email protected] or saddle- young men to become positive contrib social and educational programs. you are interested in normal or disor your fnends, all are welcome! Add the upstockton.tripod.com. Equestrian club utors in their community, personal, and Contact Dan Hickson at dered communication and want to help Facebook for up to date information of participates in activities such as lessons professional lives, as well as the lives [email protected]. promote awareness about health issues events! and shows. Come see what we are ail- of others. Contact Jose Zabaleta at involving communication come and about! [email protected] for more S.A.V.E. (Stockton Action Volunteers check us out! We are also available on The Asian Student Alliance meets information. for the Environment) now meets on Facebook under 2009 Stockton Speech Thursdays at 4:30pm in C-134. ASA F.E.M.A.L.E.S- meets Mon at 5:30 in Thursdays at 5pm in F-223. We are and Hearing Club. welcomes all Asians and non-Asians to TRLC meeting room I. Contact Multicultural Connection - meets New Jersey's oldest environmental stu- promote the Asian culture and the Latrenda Thorhas x. 1825 or find us on every Tueday at 4:30pm in Upper" G- dent-run organization: working for Stockton Surf Club- meets ever Thurs. unique Asian American society. For Faqebook! Wing Lounge. For more information, social and environmental change. For @ 4:30 in F119. Contact Mike Cliver more information contact Jason Kong contact Matthew Romen more information, contact Mike, Kyle, @ 609-442-9316. Surf Club's mission at [email protected]. GEROS Club- meets the 3rd Thursday [email protected], or cell: or• Cori at X4728, email us at is to bring together the Stockton com of the month at 4:30 p.m. in Room F- 609-923-241 [email protected], or stop by munity of waveriders to promote the Catholic Campus Ministry/Newman 224. GEROS or Gerontology our office in G209 positive aspects of the sport of kings! Club -offers Sunday Mass at 7pm Educational & Experience Related Muslim Students Association meets Find us on Facebook! every weekfor all students at The Opportunities for Students was created Tuesdays at 5:00 in F-122. We wel Sigma Sigma Sigma- meets Sundays Catholic Campus Ministry Center, 235 to help gerontology students enhance come all Muslims and non-Muslims to at 8pm in C135. Provides a life long Unified Black Student- meets Thurs at Pomona Road(across from the athletic their skills as future leaders in the make a representation and spread sorority experience for women by pro- 4:30 in F-212. A brother and sisterhood fields and observatory). The Newman gerontology field. GEROS offers its knowledge about the religion. . moting a perpetual bond of fnendship, society that focuses on unity, dignity, Club meets Wednesdsay nights at 7pm members educational and networking develops sfrong womanly character and and pride within one's self, race, and in Upper G-Wing 208. All are wel opportunities and also the chance to N.A.A.C.P - The Richard Stockton inspires high standards of ethical con culture. Contact Tracey Smith at come! For more information call: 609- socialize with other students who share College Chapter of the N.A.A.C.P's duct. Contact Maum Mazza at [email protected]. for more 804-0200 or email: similar career interests. For more mission is to improve educational, [email protected]. Or visit information . [email protected]. information please contact Kimberly social and economic status across all www.sigmatriee.tripod.com http://loki.stockton.edu/~ubss, or on Spangler at [email protected] color lines; to keep the public aware of Facebook. Campus Crusade for Christ - Meets or Bonnie Camp at the adverse effects of racial discrimina Social Work Club- meets the last Thursday evenings at 4:30 pm in room' [email protected]. tion; equality of rights of all persons; Tuesday of the month at 4:30 in C-135. Water Watch- meets Tuesdays at 5:00 F245. Email or Facebook William and to encourage political action Contactill G208. Water Watch is dedicated to Betts, [email protected] Gilda'« Club -forming at Stockton. through voter empowerment. It meets [email protected]. A vol the improvement of NJ's water quality. Living with Cancer? Come join us to every other Wednesdays at 8:30 p.m in unteer organization for students major Find us on Facebook! Campus Marketing Association learn what support services are avail the TRLC meeting room. Contact ing in Social Work. hopes to help marketing/management able to you through Gilda's Club South Derek Simmons at (551) 998-1216 or students gain a:wareness of potential Jersey. Interest Meeting Thursday, room ext. 2768, or email dereksim- Sophomore Class Council- meets on opportunities in the business world. October 29, 2009 4:30 p.m. - Upper N- [email protected] for more informa Thurdays at 8:30pm in the Lakeside The next meetings are TBA. For more Wing. For more information contact us tion, or Sammy Sanchez at x2263. Visit Lounge. Want to help promote school info, contact Brittany Pellak at pel- at: 609-926-2699, 609-926-2688 (fax), N.A.A.C.P's website at spirit, run events, and raise money to [email protected] Also, visit us on www.gildasclubsouthjersey.org www.naacp.org/home/index.htm buy a gift for the school from the Class facebook "Stockton's campus market ing association."Next meeting TBA! Hillel/JSU meets every Wednesday at The Occupational Therapy Club 7:30pm in upper G wing lounge start meets on the first Tuesday of the month Wondering where your club information went? The Certifled Peer Educator Club ing October 29th. We sponsor many at 5:00pm in WQ203. The purpose of meets on Tuesdays from 4:30 to 5:30 in trips and events where you can meet the Club is to promote knowledge F-212. Contact President Kara Lynch at other Jewish students. Non-Jewish stu about the profession of occupational Well, the Argo has decided to not print club information unless it [email protected]! dents are always welcome to learn therapy as well as the MSOT program is updated to represent accurate meeting times and officials. more about Jewish Culture. Free Food of study offered at the College. The Circle K International - meets every always.provided! Club engages in service and social Send all updated club information to; Wednesday at 8pm in room G208 activities geared toward an understand CKI is a student run organization on the Hospitality & Tourism Management ing of disability and the promotion of arqostkgyahoo.com college, district and international level. Society - Be part of all the fun and human occupation across the hfespan. We are a community service oriented excitement. Our meeting days are (ten At the next meeting on 12-1-09 a recent club and also host many events on and tatively) every other Tuesday at 4:30 in graduate of the program will speak to have your club publicized again! March 2007 Page 32 t I o.bf tampons help support the environment by creating 58% less waste" than any applicator brand. As national sponsors of the Great American Cleanup, we're proud to present 1 mthe o.b: mighty, small:'^ challenge. Gather a campus Cleanup team onhneat www.mightysman.com^ob-o'.'sll^ii^qc J't- Ji IN PARTNERSHIP WITH mighty, smalir CREAT AMERICAN challenge CLEANUi Save 20% on housing Limit impact of future tuition increases -:1 ' r -- STOCKTON fH!" RU HAKO STO('K U)N CO! Oi- Ni'W M Nl-VV IHRSltY'S ^j» GRli\iN COlJJXitr Stockton i% m equal OFvporlunUv institution efKouraging a da appjicar>rs See vwvw.stcxkton-edu/affirrmtjve action. 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