Part 6 - The Adversaries of Love

1 Strange Love - Part 6 Handout - March 17, 2021

Today’s Text: 1 Corinthians 13:4b 15 Ways to Love In this epic treatise on love, the Apostle Paul is so intent on ensuring people understand its core element of action, that he painstakingly delineates not one or two, but 15 characteristics that capture its essence—each of which are worthy of examination. Remember The 3 Ls… As we delve into each characteristics of love, remember to do the 3 Ls: 1. Listen: This time of day, it’s easy to drift and be satisfied with just being present. But the approach we’ll take with these characteristics of love have the potential to change your entire view of love, so you’ll want to be all ears.

2. Learn: Look for new information or concepts you didn’t know, and try to ingest them so that they become a part of your Christian worldview.

3. Live: Don’t be satisfied with simply learning something new, but always strive to look for ways to incorporate what you’ve learned into your life-style, otherwise it just becomes information. In other words, live it out!

2 Strange Love - Part 6 Handout - March 17, 2021 Characteristics #4 & 5 Verse 4b - “It does not boast, it is not proud.” An Important Note! It’s important to understand that the Apostle Paul’s inclusion of boasting as another characteristic of what love is not has its grounding in what was going on in the Corinthian Church at that time. Remember that what prompted Paul to pen this chapter was the apparent flaunting of spiritual gifts by some members in the Corinthian congregation. In fact, it is highly probable that some were even boasting about their gifts, creating an atmosphere of tension and inferiority among some members—hence, Paul’s notation that such behavior is clearly not love. Words Focus We all understand boasting to be extravagant self-praise; speaking of oneself with excessive ; self-aggrandizement

Interestingly enough, pride is the source of all boasting. We boast because of our pride. Boasting is: • An outgrowth of pride • Ramification of pride • A residual effect of pride Hence Paul’s choice to list them together. They exhibit a parent—child relationship, with pride being the parent and boasting being the child. Different words, but same family.

3 Strange Love - Part 6 Handout - March 17, 2021

The Apparent Conflict The tension between agape love and its adversaries, boasting and pride, couldn’t be more apparent. If agape love is the act of the will to unconditionally treat others with the highest good, then boasting and pride would be clear barriers to this end. Think about it… • How can we possibly treat others with the highest good while boasting about ourselves? • How can we possibly treat others with the highest good while wallowing in our own , self- importance, and inflated sense of self? It’s simply not possible. We cannot truly agape others while massaging our own egos at the same time. It is no wonder pride is listed as one of the seven things God hates: Word Check: • Proverbs 6:17 (“a proud look.”) So boasting and its problem parent, pride, are deadly enemies of love because they both work against the true intent of love, which is to treat others with the highest good (as God does us). But because pride is at the core of boasting, it’s important that we be able to identify the main symptoms of a prideful heart.

4 Strange Love - Part 6 Handout - March 17, 2021 Five Symptoms of a Prideful Heart 1. Self-exaltation: Pride gives credit to itself. This is exactly what we think it is… It’s when we succeed and give credit to ourselves, as if our success is all our own doing. This is the athlete who declares, “I’m the greatest!” It’s the student who yells, “I’m the smartest.” It’s the politician who brags, “Without me, this country would not be where it is today.” But Jesus warns that God will humble those who exalt themselves: • Matthew 23:12

2. Self-: Pride thinks it deserves. A common attitude nowadays, self-entitlement is rooted in a prideful heart. You name the privilege, and we feel entitled it. We feel entitled to the best of everything: the best jobs, the best salaries, and the best opportunities. We feel entitled to live in the best neighborhoods, drive the best cars, and live in the most impressive houses. The irony, however, is that at the core of the gospel is the idea that we aren’t entitled to anything, except punishment for our sins. • Romans 6:23

5 Strange Love - Part 6 Handout - March 17, 2021

3. Self-Reliance: Pride relies on itself. What’s the number one reason many people don’t get saved? And no, it not unbelief, although that’s a close runner-up. But the number one reason people reject Christ is self-reliance. “I don’t need God.” “I can live a good life on my own.” In addition, self-reliance is the reason many won’t accept help from other people.” But at the root of this is nothing but pride. • Proverbs 16:18

4. Self-Justification: Pride excuses itself. Ever found yourself making excuses for why you did this thing, or why you did that thing, when ultimately you were at fault? Well, at the heart of this is nothing but pride. Whenever we find ourselves trying to justify actions for which we were clearly at fault, it’s s sure sign of pride. Pride has no room for humble transparency, only cover-up to save face. But God clearly tells us that we have to take accountability for ourselves. • 2 Chronicles 7:14 •

6 Strange Love - Part 6 Handout - March 17, 2021 5. Self-Righteousness: Pride promotes it’s own righteousness. This was a huge problem with the scribes and Pharisees of Jesus’ day. They were constantly demonstrating their immense pride through their self-proclaimed righteousness. Posturing themselves as the holiest of holies, they walked around as if they were the end-all and be-all of Judaism. And unfortunately, some today have taken a page out of the pharisees’ books. They love projecting the “Holier than thou” image of someone who is above all things human. They love posturing themselves as someone who walks the walk, talks the talk, and who knows more about God than God himself. But Jesus warns against this kind of sanctimonious behavior. •Matthew 6:1-2

7 Strange Love - Part 6 Handout - March 17, 2021

Your Breakout Group Challenges ! Pride & Boasting in the Word! Group Challenge #1 Brainstorm with your group members two examples from the Bible where you see the sin of pride clearly at play. Who were they? What was the context. Please be prepared to explain.

Group Challenge #2 Brainstorm with your group members two examples from the Bible of persons boasting about themselves. Who were they? What was the context? Note: boasting can often times be communicated through overt action as well.

8 Strange Love - Part 6 Handout - March 17, 2021 Now, Let’s Live It! Looking Inward On the Hunt for Pride 1. Take some time to think about the five symptoms of a prideful heart. Are there any symptoms you honestly see as a pattern within your own behavior? If so, write them down. This will be your first step toward addressing it.

2. Once you’ve identified any areas of pride in your behavior, then do the hard work of thinking about how those patterns of pride may have impacted your relationships—whether platonic or romantic. You’d be surprised as to how destructive pride patterns can be in the area of relationships.

3. Then pray and ask God for help in overcoming these areas of pride in your life. In other words, make a concerted effort to address and put this area of pride on the alter.

9 Strange Love - Part 6 Handout - March 17, 2021

Quotable… !

“No one has ever choked from swallowing their pride.”

10 Strange Love - Part 6 Handout - March 17, 2021